Free AdviceGet Free Advice
Home | Get advice | Give advice | Topics | Columnists | - !START HERE! -
Make Suggestions | Sitemap

Get Advice


Search Questions

Ask A Question

Browse Advice Columnists

Search Advice Columnists

Chat Room

Give Advice

View Questions
Search Questions
Advice Topics

Login

Username:
Password:
Remember me
Register for free!
Lost Password?

Want to give Advice?

Sign Up Now
(It's FREE!)

Miscellaneous

Shirts and Stuff
Page Backgrounds
Make Suggestions
Site News
Link To Us
About Us
Terms of Service
Help/FAQ
Sitemap
Contact Us


I kissed my gay friend... but I have a boyfriend of three years! <<< Previous Question
Next Question >>> Is my package lost?

11 year old sex


Question Posted Friday November 16 2012, 12:25 pm

I'm 11 years old and have a boyfriend and I ALWAYS invite him over and go on dates with him. 1 year ago we had our first kiss and I feel weird knowing that I kissed someone I met only for three days! anyway, every time I lock the door of my room so we can talk privetly my mum screams out loud "MY DAUGTER IS HAVING FUN SEX!" she thinks that we have sex but we oblivesly don't ! how do I tell my mum we don't have sex? (without saying "just say mum we don't have sex were too young" because I already tried !!)

[ Answer this question ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?


Drewb13 answered Saturday November 17 2012, 12:43 am:
One simple solution to this problem.

1. Leave your door open

or

2. Don't take him to your room to talk. That's what the living room is for. Get him to know your family a bit more and maybe you won't feel the need to hide in your room

I hope this helps and good luck!

~Andrew~

[ Drewb13's advice column | Ask Drewb13 A Question
]




solidadvice4teens answered Saturday November 17 2012, 12:33 am:
She's saying it because she knows that you aren't having sex and believes this is a cute thing she's said or continues to. I don't know why she would think you were but set her straight.

She thinks this is her being cute but you're totally mortified and it is indeed an incredibly dumb and inappropriate remark for a parent to be making to someone your age or at all. Tell her how it bothers you and that you have no desire for sex at all right now. If she doesn't get it consult your father.

Better yet avoid a hassle and keep your room unlocked or open when he is around. You have nothing to hide and she will see that. Locking it isn't the right idea. She will obviously know how to knock so privacy would remain intact. I hope this helps you.

[ solidadvice4teens's advice column | Ask solidadvice4teens A Question
]



adviceman49 answered Friday November 16 2012, 4:18 pm:
There are a couple ways to look at what your mom means when she yells out what she does, but that is not your question.

While I realize talking about sex with a parent is both hard to do and not just a little embarrassing. Though talking with her about this is what you need to do.

First leave out the part about you tried, we will talk about this in a minute. What you need to do is sit down with mom and say something to the effect that. "Mom I know I am to young to be having sex and I haven't." "When I lock my door when me and my boyfriend are together it is so we can talk privately without anyone just barging in."

At this point you can if you wish to discuss with mom what she feels are your rights to privacy at your age. You are 11 and like it or not you have only those rights your parents allow you. As you get older parents generally give their children more freedom in how they conduct themselves. You can if you wish offer to make a deal with mom that when you are ready to have sex you will tell her in exchange for her helping you get proper birth control so she does not become a grandmother at an early age.

Now I will tell you I am old enough to be your grandfather. I am very liberal in my views when it comes to sex, dating and young people. What I will say is I am very disturbed by young people your age dating exclusively.

At 11 years of age you would be in middle school sixth or seventh grade. To me this is way to young to be having exclusive relationships. You should be at best group dating as in mall outings, going to the movies in groups. Doing things such as going bowling, Ice skating and miniature golfing.

To me this is a very important part of your life that you are missing out on. It is how young people learn to socialize properly and properly deal with different situations. Selective or exclusive dating comes later when you are 15 or 16. You can call me old fashion if you want and maybe I am though sociologists and psychologists agree with me.

In everything we do there is a learning curve, this includes dating. You didn't just jump on a two wheel bicycle and start riding you used training wheels for a while. Call this period of dating the training wheels stage. It is important to go through this stage. To put it a different way; life is somewhat like an algebra problem. You can't skip any steps and expect to get the right answer.

Back to your question. I suggest you have a straight talk with mom along the lines I suggested above. Honesty is the best policy in all situations. It may be embarrassing but it will result in the right answer for you.

[ adviceman49's advice column | Ask adviceman49 A Question
]
Recent popular questions:
Want to give advice?

Click here to start your own advice column!

why do adults blame everything on the media?
I had sex with a girl but
Just had my first annual physical exam
When is the right time to lose my virginity?
girl hating my guts
Frustrated over my boyfriends lack of opinion about our relationship
Dirty on FaceTime
I want to help people who think of or try suicide.
having mixed feelings
what does it mean to be a
I don't know how to end it with him?!?!?
Will I ever have a chance with anybody?
its my first time wearing a tampon will my tampon fall out when i swim
why cant I breath propbley
bleeding after fingering
Because of religion is it really over?
Help regarding an abortion at 13 years old
33 year female virgin, never masturbated, should i be?
Meet up with old friend
He admitted he thought of me as a fling.

All content on this page posted by members of advicenators.com is the responsibility those individual members. Other content © 2003-2014 advicenators.com. We do not promise accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any advice and are not responsible for content.

Attention: NOTHING on this site may be reproduced in any fashion whatsoever without explicit consent (in writing) of the owner of said material, unless otherwise stated on the page where the content originated. Search engines are free to index and cache our content.
Users who post their account names or personal information in their questions have no expectation of privacy beyond that point for anything they disclose. Questions are otherwise considered anonymous to the general public.

[Valid RSS] eXTReMe Tracker