I'm 21 years old, have had my share of different types of relationships so I enjoy answering love life questions. Whether it's about getting closer emotionally or physically don't hesitate to ask, hopefully I'll be able to help. I also love the medical field and will be a registered nurse soon. If you have any questions regarding a recent medical diagnosis (don't ask for one please, not a doctor) I can help you better understand it and the treatment as well


.. attractive?

I feel like I don't want to be involved with him because I don't find him to be physically attractive, but at the same time I really like his personality, and I think through that I've become pretty sexually attracted. ugh what a mess

teenage hormones suck. but i can't help from fantasizing about him, even though i think i'd be embarrassed to be seen with him in that way, apart from as a friend. i guess it kind of makes me shallow, but I'd just want to be romantically involved with a guy I could feel is hot, and who I wouldn't be embarrassed to be seen in public with, since I'm physically attractive myself (i'm not trying to be cocky, just being honest). i mean the guy isn't THAT ugly, or even obese, i think he could actually look a lot better if he just took care of himself better, wore better clothes, and perhaps got a gym membership or something.

see, im picky like this and this is how im perpetually single. but i dont want to be desperate and go for a guy i'm not fully into, you know

I don't see how you can be sexually attracted to someone and not find them physically attractive... But alright. For the most part I understand what your saying but if your always single for this reason then the truth is your not as attractive as you make yourself out to be. Some girls have that problem and when she lets it show through her personality its just annoying. My point is You need to understand that just like girls guys like different things different looks. I alot of girls attractive but I've always been more attracted to thicker girls so in a way a small petite girl that's runs and is in shape isn't as attractive to me as a girl that has curves. I workout 6 times a week, I have a good amount of muscle and a 6 pack but I don't put myself above people or think that I can get any girl out there and that's because some girls dont like the look of muscle, or just might not like something else about me. For some girls I'm a 10 and I've had others say that I'm a 7, and I'm fine with that. My advice is to let this "he's not attractive enough for me thing go". I've been in 2 serious relationships with two girls that to me we're very attractive but that only accounted for a very small fraction of how they made me happy when they did. It was the thoughtful stuff, telling me how they felt about me, buying me something, doing things they didn't have to to show that they cared. Those were the things that made me fall in love with them and what made me happy.


What are good ways for a female to masturbate, have lots of pleasure, and not break your hymen

Clitoral masterbations; that is to rub your clit and orgasm that way. I don't see why you want to keep your hymen though, some girls break it without having sex so it doesn't make much sense to me


I'm 19 and my boyfriend of 5 years is 22. We're both virgins because I want to wait til marriage. Last night, I told him I was ready to have sex and I was done waiting. I'm not sure if that's true or not, however. He didn't pressure me but I know he is tired of waiting. Well we went to have sex and he was barely in my and I couldn't stand the pain. We had to stop and then I got really depressed. I feel like I'm failing as a girlfriend and we shouldn't be together because I can't handle him. I don't enjoy being fingered, it hurts too. What's wrong with me?

I'm sorry about that but you really have nothing to worry about, your a virgin and so is your boyfriend and by what you've already said you both have no idea what your doing.
First off if he doesn't turn you on and make you wet of course it's Gunna hurt and be painful! It's your first time after all. So you need to do one of two things (I recommend the first)
You need to be more open about sex; by this I mean tell him what gets you going (you like or want to try him kissing your neck, doing things to your chest, biting) whatever it is that's going to make you want sex and get you wet. If you have NO IDEA which isn't Surpring then try new things.
The second is to go buy and use lube (lubricant), tell him to go to Walmart where all the vitamins and stuff is, find where the condoms are and thats where lube is. Don't get anything fancy just the normal ky lube (theres warming and tinkling too but I find them uncomfortable). Use as much as you need it will definantly help.
Remember that your trying something for the first time that neither of you are familiar with, so give it time, you'll get it right


Can you not give me advice? Your advice really hurts, you know. You said "Well you should think twice next time." on my "It feels like i'm not there question" and GUESS WHAT?! THAT JOKE WASNT EVEN ABOUT MY QUESTION! So stop giving advice to me, ok? Bye jerk

Ok I've given some mean advice plenty of times but this wasn't one of them. What I meant by "think twice" was to think about the joke you were going to pull, whether it was a little over the top or not? Maybe try something a little less out there?
I don't know whether you may have a problem or not because you didn't give us enough information. Your asking us if you think you have mental problems and didn't give us much to go off of.
I only give mean advice when I see it's fit, that I need it to get my point across, this wasn't one of the times


sorry for the length..
Im really confused..lately ive been thinking more and more about this and wondering what is wrong with me. I dont really know how to explain this but my whole life, or ever since i could remember, sometimes every now and then i would randomly out of the blue feel this weird feeling throughout my body..and it made me feel gross and uncomfortable..and if i was wearing something a bit low cut i would feel like i had to cover up or just go somewhere and be alone..i know that sounds really strange and i dont even know why that happens but lately ive been thinking about it and its been happening more often. my mom and dad got divorced when i was 12 and ive been living with my mom so i dont really see my dad that much. my dad always tries to talk to me and hangout with me but i just dont really ever want to anymore..i think its because i recently found out that he cheated on my mom while they were married and thats why they got a divorce..but i also just get this weird feeling when i think about him..i just feel uncomfortable. lately ive been wondering if maybe he molested me when i was little and i just dont remember? because when i look back to my childhood i dont have that many memories of my dad..i know he was there, but i really dont have many. i remember this one time when i was in 4th or 5th grade and my sister was in 6th grade, we were walking up a staircase and my dad was behind my sister and he squeezed her butt for a second and she said something like ew stop..and he was like what your my daughter or something like that..and my aunt (his sister) told him not to do that cause its not right. and thats pretty much the only weird thing i can remember..
when i was 16 i became so promiscuous and loved attention from boys which gradually caused me to do things i now regret. i had terrible self esteem problems. i still do. this is really something i dont like to think about but i was so desperate for attention that i hooked up with almost any boy that wanted to. i wanted to someone to like me so bad, or just have a boy care about me. obviously i was too dumb to realize that having sex with a boy will not make them like you or have feelings towards you. i think i just wanted some type of male figure to have and give me attention and care about me.
im 19 now and have had my first boyfriend for about 6 months now. he makes us have sex everyday and half the time i dont want to. sometimes i dont even feel attracted to him in that way and just want a boy that will love me and care about me and not even think about me in a sexual way. its so weird. sometimes when he touches me it makes me feel weird..i honestly dont want to believe that anything happened to me when i was young and more than half of me thinks nothing ever did. but then why do i feel this way?

You don't necisarrly have had to been molested to be confused about your sexuality; with your father gone throughout your childhood you lacked that male figure and everything that comes with it. You learned from your mother but it's really just as important to learn from your father as well. Being promiscuous in high shool isn't exactly surprising since you werent around a husband and a wife that showed affection through words and actions. Everything we do now we've seen; and usually our parents are our models.
What you need to do now is be happy. Go find a guy that doesn't pressure you to have sex, he's not a man and that's what you need. A guy that can show you what real love is and care about you. You may feel down and even undeserving of it but you need to know that EVERYONE makes mistakes, that's how we learn. You sleept with a lot of people you realized that it didn't make you happy and now your moving on to find what does.
But there is one thing that you need to know before doing this. If you don't love yourself (by forgiving your self if you need to) no one can love you. You may have heard this before but you haven't experienced it. What it means is that if you find someone that eventually falls in love with you and you don't love yourself it will not work out. You not caring about yourself, beating yourself up about your past, maybe even putting yourself in danger will not make him happy and it will kill him inside by seing that. Because he will love you and do everything he can to make you happy but it won't be enough because he can't keep you from hurting yourself.
Everyone deserves true love so go out there and find it


I don't know what to do... Sometimes it just feels like i'm "not there". Like, the other day, I played a joke on my friend and her mom called the cops on me(Were good now), and when my sister said "Mom, this lady on the phone said she called the cops", it felt like I wasn't there...
Am I mental or something? Im scared

You didn't give us enough information. What was the joke? If it was just something stupid and she has a over protective mom then ya your alright. If you did something that could have injured her or even worse then maybe you should think twice next time


Ok, so the night of 2/16/12, I had a dream...the dream went a little like this: A lady, kept going on this "rock". The rock was in the middle of a "lake" or ocean or something... Well, once she was on the rock, she stabbed herself in the side, then fell in the water. Then got up on the rock again, stabbed herself, and fell in the water. Then happened again and again and again!! This "lady" looked sorta like me, but older...
Then, last night, I had a similar dream. I was somewhere, and me/this lady stabbed herself again and again!!! But, she was in this restaurant or something!!

My sister used to have dreams of her getting shot, and her friend said "You might have been shot in your past life."

Do you think I stabbed myself in my past life, or something? Please help!

I'm not necisarrly a believer in past lives (I'm not religious either) but even if it's true and you did kill yourself, what the hell does it matter?
Dreams are dreams that's it, I've had scary dreams for weeks at a time and no I don't think I got murdered by monsters in my past lives.
My point is nobody on this earth can prove that past lives are what's true, god is real, or the devil is real. So don't ask questions to where the answer your going to get is a personal belief; it's pointless. This is where we get "don't believe everything you hear" from


Well I used to date this boy and he broke up with me and he said we will probably get bac together but now he is kinda rude. idk what to do

Listen. You like him a lot and that's why your putting up with him but you really shouldn't. He is a high school boy who has no idea what he wants (he's only going to hurt you). There are some boys that just want a nice girl like you and he isnt one of them.
Chances are your not going to listen to us here and get back with him because you really like him and that's ok, sometimes we just have to learn for ourselves.
I know this because I'm 19, a guy, and I had friends like him in high school


my boyfriend wants to do anal but i dont know if its a good idea. i need help!

If your asking if girls actually like it then the answer is yes. Your probably scared that it's going to hurt even more than sex did your first couple of times and it will. But just like sex once you get use to it it's more pleasure than pain.
No matter the size of your guy use lube until you know you can do it without, with some guys you'll always have to use it (7 plus)
Relax and be patient with it, sounds funny but take it a inch at a time, in a couple minutes you'll be use to it and won't hold back.
Gl and I hope you get more input from a women's point of view; I'm a guy but me and my ex were really open to talking about this kind of stuff so all this is basically from her


When I was younger my father would chase me into my room and beat me over the littlest things (ie saying I don't like broccoli), but after he got arrested he stopped, mostly. But now my older brother is taking after him. He is a six-foot-four three hundred pound football player, and has tried to break my neck before, and today punched me in the ribs and now I can't breathe right or move my left arm. When I told my parents they told me to grow up and stop being so dramatic. What can I do? (16-year-old girl)

Your parents Are morons and have failed at being parents, I wouldn't even call them mom or dad if I was in your positiion. A guy hitting a girl even if it's a family member is never ok; I know it's hard to believe since you've been brought up like that but it's not ok. Even though your brother is 6tt tall and 300 pounds he is still a little boy and hasn't matured enough to realize what he is doing is pathetic and needs to get his ass kicked.
Zane is right you need to report this to a police officer or school counselor that's what they are there for. A girl 16 or 30 years old should never have to deal with being abused by a child in a mans body.


I really liked this 17 year old.. and he swore he liked me too... he would tell me he loved me and call me baby and baby and sweetie and hun.. but he txted me this morning and told me he had to work.. i was thrown off because he's never had to work in tha morning.. but i let him go.. i was chillen at home and my best friend called me and told me he was at tha mall with this other girl... they were all over each other and holding hands...

I don't understand... He told me he loved me today b4 he went to "work"! He promised me he would never make me cry and he wouldn't ever use me... I don't understand at all.. was i wring for believing him!? Am i too naive?? Why is this happening to me!?

Calm down; your young and you already proved that what you have isn't true love. When you really love someone you trust them with everything so something a friend told you about them shouldn't make you feel so much as to doubt everything you've ever had with the person (not saying that he wasn't with a girl at them mall).
So instead you COMMUNICATE with the person you "love" by Asking him if what you heard was true or not, if he denys it then that's it you let it go, if he is lying it will catch up with him.
I can't answer whether you are naive or not because you didnt tell me enough about you or how your relationship with this guy started and how it is.
If you think your naive for following your heart even though it got you hurt then your wrong. Its hard to explain but if you don't put yourself out there like that when it feels right (act on your feelings) then you'll never find that someone special.


Ok so i had unprotected sex last thursday. Not this thursday but the last one. And i took plan B on sat morning. I took one at 3pm then 12 hrs later the other pill. My friend said that im supposed to get my period in the next 3 days and its now sunday. Like a week and a day has gone by and still no period. Whats going on? Does plan B ever fail? I mean my friend took it and she got her period 3 days later. So thats getting me really nervous ...
20 F.

There are statistics on how well it works by day you take it (1st day after, 2nd, etc). I don't remember them since its been a while since I've had to get them but you should still be in the 80s since you took it the 2nd day, you should look it up.
Some advice for next time this happens is to go out and buy it right away so it has a better chance of working and try to buy the one single pill.
And if your the one who's buying it you already know how ridiculously expensive they are so I recommend:
. birth control pills if your in a serious relationship/ vcf (vaginal contraceptive film) the first you need a prescription and the second you can find at wal mart or Walgreens
. Condoms if your not in a relationship

O and don't freak out about this, you really won't know until you get your period or you wait a week to take a pregnancy test, if your Gunna take a pregnancy test make sure to read the instructions before you use it


I love my voice, and I plan to be famous. I've always wanted to write a song, but I just don't know how. It seems easy, but it isn't for me. How do I write a song?

Well I can tell you how I write my songs; get a paper a pencil and whatever instrument you play. Make a chord progression or play some notes that will make up your first versus and intro if you want, then you take it one line at a time with words. I've found if I write a full song without the notes with it it's really hard if not impossible to put the music part along with it.
I know you love your voice and all but maybe you should take some lessons just to see if your as good as you think you are. Chances are your not but that's fine, if you really love music then you'll practice until you get where you want to be, gl


So the last week my mom hasn't been home. She's been staying with her mother in the hospital. She finally came home last night for a little bit, and I ran her some hot bath water, made her coffee for her, and everything.

I get off of work at 2 I've been getting up at 6 to take my 7 year old brother to school, and than I have college at 8.

I've been exhausted, but I've been doing it for her.

Well she came home last night, and she ran and was giving my brother hugs and kisses and saying how much she's missed him;

but here I am, all excited to see her, and she pushes me to the side, literally, and goes to him. I'm thinking, 'where is my hug? why aren't you excited to see me?"

Than today I cancelled one of my classes to come home to meet my mom to go with her to see my nana, and she was asleep, woke up at 11:30 and was like, you wanna go wtih me, and I was like yeah, thats why I left school early; she didn't approve of my outfit, said it wasn't appropriate. I was in a joggin suit, just like she wore, but my hair was pulled up;

so I went to go change, and put on some tenny shoes, and she left with out me. Said she don't have time to waste on me?

I just really wanted to see my nana, and I haven't been able to because they won't let me drive that far;

I just don't get her. Why does she treat me so differently? My brother always comes first. I may be older, but I like love and affection too?

Than Crimson (my brother) asked her if I died, would she be upset, and she goes 'i guess'. And than he asked if he died, would she be upset, and she said "Yeah, I don't thinkI could deal with losing you"


I do everything for her! I dn't get a thank you or nothing! I've tried talking to her about it, and she said that i need to get over it, and stop being selfish. Selfish for just wanting attentin for my parents?


It's not right that your mother is neglecting you but your old enough to deal with this. You do know you don't have to go out of your way to please her; stop with the coffee the baths and everything extra you do for her because with the way things are going now nothings going to change (she's still going to treat you like shit).
You have enough things to deal with, which I can completely relate to ( I work everyday and go to college as well). I wouldn't put myself through what you are, as if we don't have enough stuff to deal with


No clue.... Haha don't worry about it though, situation doesn't even apply :) lol

I checked my feed back, you did :). Glad you didn't let that stuff get to you


Haha uh yeah that question? That was from forever ago?

You did get my answer though right?


okay a few months ago i wrote on here cuz the love of my life left and i was devasted.okay i moved on(i just think nout hom 24/7) and i had a two month realtionship with a guy who payed no attiotion to me but the other females i dumped him he came running back i take him and he does the same thing.so i broke up with him again okay 2 days later i get together with the love of my lifes(roger) old bestfriend(till he moved)okay the day we get together he tells my that roger is comin back tommrow so i called roger and its true the next day at school i see him and i get real weak and my legs are shaking and my heart is racing and he comes and gives me a hug.the next day i tell him im going out with(alex)he is ok with it but i realy love roger but he just doesnt treat me right and alex does!! and tonight there hanging out roger trying to make alex be bad cause he isnt and idk what to do i LOVE roger soo much but i dont want to end things with alex.and i already told roger i dont want to become to close to him cause of alex but i have 4 classes with him and he is just sooo cute!!! rember he is the love of my life and i love him so muchh!!! thxx

Roger isn't the love of your life and you don't even know what love is, sorry. I don't have to know how old u are to tell you that your in junior high or in your first years of high school. The feelings that you have around roger the heart beating fast and getting nervous is because you think he's cute, that's it.
So my advice is to dump Alex and tell him that your way too immature and naive to be in a relationship and all your going to do is end up hurting him or... Grow up and see that you have a nice guy that treats you right and cares about you and not fuck things up.
You don't have to believe me but I do know what I'm talking about if you think other wise talk to someone older then you who is in a loving relationship and ask them what u should do


okay. sooo i read your advice to this one girl and i really liked it and i\'m about to tell you the entire story of my relationship (7 months) (things i\'m too scared to tell my friends) and i just wanna see what you say.

alright. i am a fourteen year old girl (freshman) and the guy is a sixteen year old boy (sophomore). it all started about ten months ago when i met him. we\'ll call him jack. (not his real name) and i saw him playing baseball last summer and i thought he was cute. when school started we talked because of a mutual friend. one football game he looked at me and smiled and after the football game we went to bdubs and just talked. after another football game (i\'m a cheerleader) he talked to me and asked for my number. we texted and talked and hung out in groups for about three months and then he asked me out.

I was really really really happy. then one night about a month in he told me about a certain time with his ex girlfriend, and how he had fingered her. i was kinda upset by this but i don\'t really think i had a right to be. it\'s just before we started dating i had never kissed or done anything with a boy and i didn\'t want him to expect anything like that from me. he told me he didn\'t and that he valued our relathionship more than the physical stuff. and i believed him. thing is, i let him finger me. i wouldn\'t say he pressured me into it at all. he would try to slip his hand down there every once in a while and i would stop him, until one night i wanted him to do it and he did. things were fine. about anothere two months later, i gave him a handjob. he kind of asked for that... then we didn\'t go a lot farther for awhile but our relationship started to get really rocky. he would be a complete ass to me sometimes and it felt like all i ever did was annoy him or embarrass him and it sucked. when i went out of town he went out to lunch with this girl kacy. nothing happened, but i was still mad cuz he didn\'t wanna tell me about it. she was the one that asked him and there was anohter guy there but jack and kacy used to like eachother and she\'s constantly flirting with him. jack and i would just fight all the time and it sucked. we almost broke up but he said he was gonna try harder and he did. and things were slowly starting to get better. just four days before he broke up with me (he brok up with me on tuesday) he told me he felt so much happier and that he could tell things were better.

But i\'m skipping a part... a week before we broke up i gave him a blowjob. i didn\'t really wanna do it but i felt almost kind of guilted into it. let\'s just say i\'m really bad at handjobs and i stopped giving them. well he kept fingering me and he could make it feel sooo good. he told me we had been dating for six months and that i should be comfortable enough with him to give him a blowjob. that he felt like the physical part of our relationship was completely one sided. And that made sense to me so i did it... i trusted him when i did it and i wanted to make him happy and he broke up with me in a text message a week later. i don\'t even get why he did it when four days prior he told me how much happier he was...

well its been a few days since we broke up. and i found out that after we broke up on tuesday he alrady started talking to this new girl on thursday. that just hurt really bad... i thought i wanted him back but i don\'t think i do anymore. i just gave so much of myself to this guy and i\'m so hurt right noww because it seems like those seven months didn\'t mean anything to him at all.

i just don\'t know what to do... and i would really appreciate any advice you can give me. thing is i can\'t talk about this stuff with my friends because i\'m too ashamed to tell them that we did all that physical stuff... so please don\'t involve the advice doing that. i really don\'t want to.

I didn't read the whole thing over again because I know I've already answered this question; if there was something new in it (u had another question about my advice) send me another question or a message to my email or something


I am 13 years old and I went to a boy who was 14 years oles house and I asked where the bathroom was and he pointed and sayer down the hall then I was pooping and he came in and sat on my lap then he wiped my ass off and put my thongs back on me then he sayed the way he was sitting was GOOD and we should do it longer HELP

He has problems. I don't know how you feel about this guy but if he's still worth hanging out with then you better tell him that it made you extremely uncomfortable and NEVER to do it again. Lucky for the both of us it's really that simple


Does anybody know any songs by a FEMALE singer about being in love but people keep doubting that love? Like they keep insisting it won't last but the female singer says it will?

Please only list any songs recorded between 2000 and 2011.

I like pop, pop-punk, rock, electro-pop, and SOME country. Like Taylor Swift, Cady Groves, Carrie Underwood, or The Band Perry.



Rachael Yamagata- be be your love


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