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I'm closing my account after being on this site for longer than I can remember right now.

I would like to say thank you to all the columnists that I've met through this site, may your hearts of gold continue to shine through this site.

My reason is simple: I no longer feel I have a use for it anymore. I once was a person who couldn't help other people because of certain difficult situations in my past, but all that has now changed. This site allowed me to be who I really was and for that I'm so grateful for that. It played a very important role in my life and I'll never forget it!

The questions which I answered allowed me to reflect on my life and where it was going, and gave me the opportunity to really appreciate the life that I have, which I'm now living with open arms.

I wish you well for the future,
Triquetra....signing off for the last time.


Member Since: November 24, 2007
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Last Update: December 1, 2010
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16/f

So me and my boyfriend really like each other. Maybe love but I don't like pushing myself into saying that until I am completely sure. He says he loves me and all that. I do believe him and he's completely honest with me.
The thing is, he's moving to another state about 6 hours away.
When we got together we both knew he'd be moving eventually but decided to make the best of it while we can.
Well he is totally serious about me and we have this very long talk about what we're gonna do when he leaves. He brought up three options, we could just break up and go our separate ways, stay friends still after high school then get together if we still feel the same(we only have a year and a half of school left), or long distance relationship.
I'm so confused on what to do. So I talked to a couple people about it and they said if I wanted to at least try it, then we could try long distance to see if it works out, if it just didn't for some reason then stay friends.
What do you think would be the best option?
I think he is completely trustworthy and we've already had a talk about that and we're totally honest with each other and he trusts me. We were also friends for a couple years before we started dating anyway so I knew him pretty well and got to know him more since we've been going out.
I'm not sure if I could handle long distance. He'd call every day and all that. I think maybe I could but I've never dealt with this before so I'm not sure.
Just any advice would help. Thanks! (link)
I've decided to make this my last question to answer before I close my account.

You know, I've got a friend here who has a boyfriend who lives in Alaska, whilst she is here in the UK...that's definitely more than 6 hours (I think!) and she needs to wait months before she can see him. Their relationship (as far as I know) is still going strong and they talk regularly using Skype. So they would fit in with the long distance relationship. Come to think of it, I have many friends who can handle long distance relationships. Yes, they miss their other halves like crazy but they cope well. Just the knowledge that they're going to see them soon is enough to keep them going.

Now, I've got two other friends who live in different parts of the UK, but they sort of split up over the distance issue without (in my opinion) not even trying. That would fit into the remain friends category.

Personally, I don't think that the 'break up and go separate ways' is an option. If you love him, and he loves you, then that should not be on the table really.

If you do love him, try and make it work over the long distance. Set dates for when you can see each other whenever you can. Get Skype so you can talk to him for however long you want, whenever you want and for free! I talk to my parents who are 8 hours away through Skype and you hardly notice the distance. I talk to relatives in Mauritius through Skype and the distance is barely noticeable. The trick is, is to find the ways in which you can communicate with each other. In this day and age, there are many ways you can keep a long distance relationship working.

Bottom line: don't give up on your relationship. Get Skype and work out dates which you can see each other. Long distances relationships are hard, but if the commitment is there, then it will work.

I hope that helps in some way, and I wish you both a long living happy relationship :)

Triquetra....signing off for the last time.


I need to break up with my long-dist relationship boyfriend. We've been dating 7 months. There's no real reason to break up except..I sent him a pic that wasn't me. I know, I know. I'm too ashamed to tell him the truth, and I'm supposed to be 'visiting' him in a month. I need to end it, what do I say? I don't want to hurt his feelings, so nothing like 'I don't love you anymore' or whatever.

I was thinking of saying something along the lines of my dad disapproves, and I have to end it with you, or he'll kick me out or something. I know, just lying more. But seriously, I just want to get out of this now, it's my own fault and I know now to never do it again. Any help would be appreciated, thanks. (link)
So if I've understood this ocrrectly, you've sent him a picture that wasn't you and now you want to break up with him because of that?

I'm going to be very blunt and say that makes no sense to me at all, or what exactly you did wrong.

Have you actually met this guy? How far away is he from you?

Actually, after reading over your question again, I'm just confused. Not trying to be mean or anything, but you haven't been clear as to what you did wrong to want to break up with him, esxcept for sending him the wrong picture, which makes me think that you've never met this guy before.

If you could provide me with a fuller explanation, I can't really help. I keep getting the feeling that you've left something out.

But, based on what you've sent me, I would suggest that you talk to him, and just break it to him gently, saying that you're not feeling that the realtionship is not going anywhere (which I assume is the truth) and that you would feel better if the two of you ended the 'relationship'.

Don't bother lying, because that will only make you feel worse. As long as you tell him the truth, I think it would turn out better. And don't make it overly complicated. Keep it simple and to the point.

OH, hang on........... am I correct in saying that you sent this guy a picture of you (supposedly)naked? If this is the case, then that makes more sense to me. Ok, if that is the case, then I would still suggest the same approach in the above paragrpahs, but also tell him that you weren't exactly truthful.

Sometimes lying is a good thing, to protect soembody from getting hurt, but lying for your own gain isn't. Tell him the truth and I think that you'll find it easier to say than lying directly in his face.

Sorry if I got completely the wrong end of the stick here, and of this layout, it's just how my mind works :)

If you have any more questions or would like to correct me, don't hesitate to ask another question.

Take care,
Triquetra


i broke up with my boyfriend of almost two years about a month ago and im still not over him. it didnt even bother him though because he was a total ass to me and even cheated with my best friend on me. i was used, cheated on, lied to repeatedly, he tried to turn everyone on me, used all my money all the time even took it and was not a gentleman, i cant seem to live without feeling me in his arms or his kisses. i miss him so much im crying so hard, iv even ben out with friends all this weekend again and i cant get over him. he is already allover many girls and going on dates. helpp please. how do i get over this (link)
Hmm, interesting.

I think it's clear that you love him, even though he did all that to you. Otherwise you wouldn't be having this sort of reacting to the break up.

I think it's also clear that this was a very one way relationship, with you being in love with him and for it to have lasted almost two years is quite an achievement.

But, despite everything, there is no quick fix to a broken relationship nor how to get over it. Especially one where the partner has been treating the other like dirt.

Let's use a very current example. Cheryl Cole's broken marriage. Ok, not exactly the same situation as you, but I think it would be a good guess that she's probably going through something very similar to you. Her husband has cheated and lied to her, and she's fought for their marriage for so long but he did nothing. But having to break up with her husband is clearly taking it's toll on her as we've seen. She's questioning as to whether she's making the right decisions over him, and whether she should try and take him back. Would I be right in saying that at some level, you're going through that as well? Actually, after looking back through your question, you've already told me that you are.

One suggestion, would be to try and do things that will distract you from thoughts about him. You went out with your friends, and that's a very good thing to do. But, don't go with your friends and think about him being there. Throw yourself into your friends, laugh and try to have some fun. Go shopping with them and just do things which you know won't make you think about him.

Second suggestion, would be not to think about the good side to this guy, try and think about the other things which he's done to you. It's true that the only memories which you are left with are only the good ones. But, I'm thinking that if you begin to think more about the things which he did to you, then the more you think about the bad stuff, the less you'll think about him. It's a harsh thing, but the fact is, is that the more time you think about the good things, the harder it will be for you to let go.

Third suggestion, talk to a friend, a friend whom you know will listen to you. Sometimes, the best thing which anybody can do is to just talk to somebody about a certain situation. Just ask her to talk with you about it, how you feel, think etc. From personal experience, I know that it's a great way to get things off your chest and to do some self-reflection as to where you are emotionally.

Do reply with anything else you would like to know, or whether this was useful!

Take care,
Triquetra


Ok my boyfriend is going to be 18 in january. and im a 17 yr old female. my boyfriend is completely head over heels in love with mariah carey since he was 7 years old1 so i thought hey doesnt oprah do nice things for people and i remember seeing an episode were she gave these two girls trips to her show so they can meet the jonas brothers cause they were so in love with them. so i was thinking if i write oprah and email her enough maybe shell be able to get my boyfriend to meet mariah carey for his birthday! my first question is do you guys think that is a good idea? like a good 18 birthday gift? and second. how can i absolutely get her to read them and were do i send them? i send her an email from her site. and i sent a letter to her publisist. and her agent. do you guys know anywere else to send stuff or anything i can say that is sure fire to work. this would make my boyfriends dreams come true. hes loved her since he was 7 and hasnt even been to one of her concerts! how sad! =[ so do you think you guys can help me please!
thanks a bunch!
(link)
Oh go for it. Seriously, I'm in the same position as he is: love Mariah, never met or seen her in concert and I think this is a fantastic idea. Keep doing what your doing and as often as possible, go on twitter and tweet Oprah. There may be a chance that she may see it, if you get it right. I don't know if your read/saw about it, but during one of Mariah's recent concerts, a couple was allowed to get engaged in front of her on stage and it happened by the guy constantly e-mailing her publicist and people until it happened. So just keep on going! Oprah also did something else for a couple of gay fans who got to meet Mariah after showing some enthusiasm. So just keep it going and I hope his wish comes true. He certianly has a lucky girlfriend!!!

triquetra


Dear Triquetra,
I am a young female and I have been dating a 23 year old man who I have know since my late childhood. Not long ago we began a sexual relationship with each other but now I think that we are falling apart. I am afraid that I cannot make him happy anymore which upsets me a lot. The last time I tried to get close to him he got angry and hit me, and kept making me feel uncomfortable. Have you ever had experience with this or can you help me to enjoy our sexual relationship more. (link)
Sorry for the late reply.

After reading your letter, I'm concerned about how he is treating you, cause hitting you isn't right at all. That can be classified as physical abuse and he can go to prison for that!

I'm assuming that he became this way after the sexual relationship began. I can't really offer any advice on that front cause that's a private thing between the two of you, but was his behaviour noticeable after it began or did it just grow over time? Sorry to be like this, but it may help me to give a better answer.

Now, you didn't mention your age which is perfectly fine, but to mention your boyfriends age tells me that there may be a noticeable age difference between the two of you? Could that be a small contribution to his behaviour? I say this because if he is older and is sleeping with somebody younger, that may be causing some problems for him morally and therefore, could lead to him acting this way. This is just speculation on your age, if it isn't relevant, ignore the above.

I want to ask you a question: are you happy? Now, most people would think that a stupid question but I really want you to think about that answer. He has hit you, and driven you away when you get close. Your not enjoying your sexual relationship from what I can tell (I'm dodging your real question for reasons I'll explain later) and there may be an age difference between the tow of you. I'm not questioning your feelings for him, but in reality, are YOU happy? If you are, great! If not, then you need to tell me.

Now, why did I just write all that and not answer your question about how to make your sex life more enjoyable? Well, it is simple really: I could give you website links which would give you advice on that sort of thing, but it doesn't mean it will make it any better. The fact is, is that if your personal relationship with the guy is fraying, then your sex life won't get better, no matter what links I give you. So, you need to fix your relationship with him first, before working on your sex life.

I think the easiest way to get things out on the table and sort them out would be to talk to him about it and see what he says. Talk, listen, emphasize and compromise. Those are the things which help a relationship progress. If one stops listening, then the whole thing will begin to fall. See how he feels or what is going through his mind and then try and help him out in some way. If you do love him, then you'll do this and get this relationship back on its feet.

I hope this helped and once again, sorry for the late reply,
triquetra


name a new song from any singer but it has 2 be hip hop rap or r&b (link)
Betcha Goin' Know - Mariah Carey
Obsessed - Mariah Carey
Standing O - Mariah Carey

triquetra


For weeks I have been iffy about even writing this.
I am young 18 and just got married in August. I am pregnant that is not why we got married but I think we rushed into it. We were planning the wedding already had my wedding dress before i found out I was Pregnant.
Sometimes I find myself regretting getting marred My reasons. I wanted to work days and go to school nights. It would be tough but id be able to better myself for me and my family he through a fit and didnt support me at all. told me either work or go to school but advises me to work because we need the money. Being pregnant I have my mood swings like most if we have an argument its all my fault he will yell at me and blame me then make me feel guilty by saying oh its always all my fault i forgot your so perfect. sometimes he makes im crap. If i feel nauses or sick at night or anything and he wants sex he pouts and acts like he is mad by not saying a workd until he gets it then goes to sleep. he goes hunting, fishing, baseball teams and tournaments etc. anything he wants and i dont argue about it i just let him.
I have asked a million times to look harder for a job. he works 2 days aweek at a sale barn doing something he likes i work full time on my swallon feet 40+ hours a week and come home exhausted and tired. its like he dont care he doesnt want to even try to look he put an app. in at burgerking one app.. in 5 weeks? we live at my dads. which i dont feel is save but dont have a choice. hes lazy
and to top it off he always wants to spend money. i used to get food stamps which just stopped but hed want a gallon of tea every 2 days. go out and buy food he wants all the time because hes to lazy to cook one thing or wait for it to get done. as soon as he gets paid he goes and spends most of the money on garbage food and gets mad when i tell him i dont want it id rather eat food i cook at home.
I love my husband to death trust me and want to work things out but i dont know what to do i talk to him about it and itslike it is in one ear and out the other. (link)
I think it is about time you sat down with your 'husband' and have a good talk about your situation.

Why did I put 'husband' like this? Because as far as I can tell (and please do correct me if I'm wrong), he hasn't been a good one or been a husband at all. You haven't really mentioned his age but I'm guessing he's around the same age as you are. But even so, he should cast aside his football or whatever he does for leisure, grow up and get ready to become the father of your baby. You can't let any of this go by, just because you want to keep him happy. You need his support and it should be him looking for a job to bring in the money, not you. He is the man of the house and therefore, should be trying to look after you to the best of his ability as a husband and father.

It is unfair on you that you should be the one doing all the hard work whilst he is out with his mates in some tournament. Think about it in your head, what is more important: some silly baseball match or the baby? I think the answer is obvious.

He needs to learn how to become responsible fast because at this rate, this marriage won't last long. I'm not trying to forecast negativity, but in reality, unless you put your foot down and tell him what he can or cannot do (e.g. stop being a baby and get a proper job or just go to any tournament), then I'm afraid your going to struggle. What's going to happen when the baby comes? Where are you going to live? How are you going to feed yourself, your baby and his/her 'father'? It's good and all saying that your living at your fathers house, but do you really think you can live there for an extended period of time? And what happens beyond that?

If your 'husband' is not ready to a) become a proper husband and begin to look after you and b) become the babies father then those issues need to be sorted out now.

You say that you felt that you had been rushed into the marriage. A month later, do you feel as if it was the right thing to do? I suggest you talk to him about this as well.

I cannot stress how important it is that you sit your 'husband' down, get him to listen and tell him plainly. This is completely unacceptable behaviour from him and you should not even begin to put up with it. BTW, sex is out of the question and he needs to know that.

Get your dad to speak to him as well. Speaking of which: does you Dad know what the hell is going on? If he doesn't, then let him know. It's ok to tell him, he has every right to know as any family member.

If he ain't going to listen, even after all you have said. Give him an ultimatum: treat me right or I leave. Simple and plain. If he still doesn't get it, leave. You cannot be with somebody who puts themselves before you.

Please to tell me the outcome of this,
triquetra


How can you differentiate between true love and friendship love? I have known Harry for 7 months and I really really like him, he's sweet, good looking, a real gentleman, he's about 3 years older than me and lives about 2 hours away by train so not that geographically desirable but I really fancy him, however I only recently discovered this and the good thing is that the feeling is mutual. I have known James since I was a little kid, he's the boy next door so we spent a small portion of our childhood growing up together, having fun, sharing not just laughs but tears as well. He's the same age as me so not as mature as Harry but he's always been there for me and in some senses he's like a brother to me, for a long time now I've been attracted to him however I don't know if he feels the same way, i've given him openings, he came to my Yr11 prom as my date but he didn't once kiss me not even a peck at the end, nothing! Am I wasting my time with him? Should I just remain really good friends with him of should I take things a step further? I love James a lot more than Harry as I have known him for longer however I don't know whether this is true love of just strong emotional friendship. How would I find out whether James was intrested in me? James comes across as not that confident hovever I know inside he is, but even if the feelings mutual I doubt that he'll be the one to make the first move :( . Any suggestions, should I play safe with Harry or shall I take my chances with James as he is first and foremost the one I know better? Thanks so much for listening, I really apreciate what your doing and the time and thought you must put in to it is commendable. It takes a special kind of person to help complete strangers with there troubles as well as dealing with your own, respect. (link)
Answer me this: when you think of James, do you feel the same feelings that you get with Harry? If you do, then this emotion could be more than the 'friendship love' which your feeling.

Another question: who do you feel more secure with? Who do you see yourself with in terms of a relationship? You need to ask these questions cause then it can help you to determine as to whom you want to be with. Gut feelings tend not to be wrong. If you feel that you can see that you could have a possible relationship with Harry, then give it a go. Why him first? Cause you already know that the feeling is mutual. Distance isn't an issue, cause I've got a friend who has got his girlfriend on the other side of the Atlantic!!!! A 2 hour train journey really shouldn't make that much of a difference.

As for James, I suggest that unless he begins to show signs of wanting to start a relationship, keep it to friendship cause you wouldn't want to put yourself in the position of making the friendship awkward. If he doesn't seem the kind to make the 1st move, don't try and put him in situations where he might.

I hope this helped,
triquetra


My whole life, so far anyways, has been one, big, miserable hell. I'm going to be 19 in September and I don't feel like I can trust anybody. I've been told I'm pretty even beautiful, but I am not popular. Everybody makes fun of me, all throughout school they've made fun of me. My friends make fun of me, my family makes fun of me, and they do it in front of people who just met me which gives them a bad impression of me. I feel like everyone hates me because of some of the stuff they say. Everyone talks down to me when I say how I feel and I just hate it! Everyone seems to want to know how you feel and then when you tell them, they yell at you! I hate my life, and I hate being alive. No one would miss me if I was dead, so why does God keep me alive? (link)
Honey, listen to me. People have made fun of me for years, made up lies about me, made me look bad in front of other people as well, and had a misconception of who I was as a person. I'm not making this up.

But I kept on going and not being put down. Why? Because I knew I wasn't what people were thinking of me or saying about me. I knew that if I let those people get to me, then I would be brought down and trodden all over as if I were dirt. But I kept my head high and whenever I heard somebody say something bad about me, I would pity them because they don't really know who I am inside and that is what you've got to remember. What people say doesn't reflect who you are, that's your decision to make. If you let what they say influence you, then of course you won't be happy.

When they talk down to you, talk right back, defend what you feel. It isn't a sin to say it and when they yell at you, say "Well, you did ask. If it wasn't what you wanted, then I'm sorry but that's how I feel so live with it". When they make you look bad in front of other people, make an effort to get to know that person and give them a second impression because that way, they get to know you better. When it comes to family, you have every right to say "stop", same with friends as well because they should know how to treat you right.

A few years ago, I had trust issues as well. But I overcame that by getting to know the people around me better and I came to trust them more. And all I had to do was talk. It didn't matter what I wore, looked etc. All I had to do was open up to them and I found a different world where they (to some level at least : ) ) accepted me for who I was and I changed the way most people saw me.

God is keeping you alive so that you can make those changes for you, not for anybody else. If your not happy, then you should try and find ways to changed that unhappiness into something better.

I hope this helped,
triquetra


Has anyone seen Janet Jackson with the Jackson family today after Michael Jackson died?

Janet Jackson seems to be missing right now, or at least out of the picture in the media. What's up with that I wonder? I'm sure it must be devastating for her and I do hope she's in good health right now.

Just wondering if anybody has heard something from Janet Jackson so we know she's OK too! I figured she would have been on TV but I haven't seen her or anything...has anybody? (link)
She has just arrived in LA. I think she is trying to keep low key to avoid more media attention than necessary so that family affairs can be kept more private.

triquetra


Michael Jackson died today and he was only 50 years old. It really took me by surprise, but it wasn't as if I didn't expect it sometime fairly soon. There have been rumors flying around for some time now about his health problems. As a matter of fact, when Michael was on trial, one day he was late because of health problems. Obviously, the judge didn't feel that Michael's health was all that important because he threatened to have Michael Jackson jailed unless he made an appearance in the courtroom. Michael showed up in his pajamas. Does anyone else remember that?

People made it out to seem as if he was faking. Some people even made it seem like he was crazy and would do ANYTHING as he was suddenly "extremely unpredictable" and all. I guess he wasn't kidding or faking about having health problems, huh?

I'm going to miss Michael Jackson. He was a man who set out to hurt no one, but the world seemed hell-bent upon hurting him. Michael Jackson was seriously the King of Pop in so many ways. Maybe he's better off wherever he is since we trashed his good name without even giving him a chance to speak. I choose to believe that he is now seated up in Heaven, seeing God for the first time.

Does anyone feel like me about Michael Jackson or am I alone in this? When I was growing up Michael Jackson was such a big role model. Sure, he was a little weird but he seemed to care and love. I'm really hurt that Michael Jackson is dead :( almost like a large portion of my childhood has been abandoned. (link)
I've never been a Michael Jackson fan, yet, when I heard that he had passed away unexpectedly. I felt something which I never expected to feel when I heard the news.

I knew that a great legend had passed away, and I also knew that somebody like MJ will probably never come again, well at least in my lifetime that is.

MJ has been in the spot light since the Jackson 5, and was never allowed to be a child thanks to his father. He was a man on the outside, but I guess that inside, he was somebody trying to have a life which he wasn't allowed to have. But, without a doubt, he will always be a legend. Whether we hated him, loved him, loathed him, we can all say one day "I was alive when Michael Jackson was". You being a fan will mean so much more in the future.

I hope, like you that the media will finally leave him alone, yet I feel that it is a crying shame that he had to die to get them to leave him alone. Finally, somewhere where they can't follow him.

I think that only his true, true, true fans know who he was as a person and I think it is obvious that you are one of those fans. You were able to see past everything written about him to see the person who he really is. It's weird when we loose somebody whom we respected, loved, admired because it always seems that we will never be able to find somebody else who can match that person because somewhere in our hearts, nobody will be able to match MJ.

Never think that your childhood is abandoned. I'm sure that there were times when his songs reached out to you in a difficult time and helped you through that moment in your life, I know what that feels like.

Most of your childhood was developed around this one man's music, love and talent and that is something which I think you can use to strive to other things. Use what you learnt from him as a person so that you can become a better person.

"What more can you give?" - use songs like this in the future to help you find the answers.

For you, MJ will always be a part of your life and as people have been saying, he lives on in his music. He may not be here physically, but he's there spiritually in his music which he loved and cared for so you must use it.

I hope you can find some form of comfort in this,

triquetra


My friend is a guy and I am worried about what he may think. I acctualy like the guy but i know we can only be friends i just want to tell him I am bi. Maybe ask how he feels about gays and bis and go from there? M 15 (link)
You know, I think that the best thing for you to do is to break it to him gently and gradually. But get a feeling for how he views gays and bisexuals before deciding whether to tell him or not.

For you to tell somebody that you like them, is a incredibly brave step, especially if it's of the same sex and I commend you for it. It's good that you know where telling him that you're bi will take you only as far as friendship. That's good. I say this because most people who tell somebody that they love/have feelings for them expect those feelings to be returned and again, I commend you for that.

I hope all goes well,
triquetra


so.. i'll keep this hort. im gonna die soon hopefully... any tips? im gonna use any and every method possible.... so yeah. just need linis to previous successful cases... any particular drugs? even prescription.... thats basically it really. if im really unlucky ill still be here till the end of this year. which is about six months, if i get what i need, then ill be outta you hair! thanks in advance. (link)
Whenever it comes to these questions, numerous times I have seen people reject the help which complete strangers whom they have never met before is giving them. Why that is, I never will figure out. Maybe you can shed some light on that mystery for me.

You say that we aren't great at giving advice? I beg to differ. Just because this is an advice site, doesn't mean that we will tell people every single little thing when asked, sometimes the line needs to be drawn and suicide is one topic which never gets the response which the person is looking for.

Why is that? Because even though we may never meet, talk, eat, laugh together, we care about you and your well being and about what you do with your life.

Words on a screen may mean nothing at first, but consider the implication of what the responses you've been getting. I know that some haven't been the most positive (and from my point of view, down right insensitive).

The problem here, is that you haven't told us as to why you want to commit suicide. I know there must be a pretty good reason from your point of view, but I think in all fairness that you should speak to someone about what you are going through and see whether we can help in other ways.

I'm not asking you to go to a psychiatrist or anything like that. Write it all out to me, to the site, anywhere you think will be fine. I know that the policy here is to keep questions brief, but if you can help us to understand what you are going through, even if we don't fully understand, it would give us some idea and give us the chance to help you.

The experience which I've gained here has told me this: if it hasn't worked once, then maybe a part of you doesn't want to die. You may not admit it, you may ignore it, but it seems to me that in reality, you don't want to.

It is probable that you'll reply, telling me "what do you know about this and what I'm thinking? Have you been through it?" or something of that nature. No, I haven't been there, and hopefully never will. What do I know about what your thinking? Nothing, just guessing.

So please, write out what your going through for us, so that we can try and help you. Sometimes, suicide isn't the final answer, there could be other ways around a problem.

Keep that in mind,
triquetra


Yeah, I'm working on a playlist of confident songs? Such as shutup and drive by rihanna and 'like this' by kelly rowland. i'm not focused on the genre, but those are the only two i have haha. thanks (: (link)
Can't Take That Away - Mariah Carey
Hero - Mariah Carey
Make It Happen - Mariah Carey
Through The Rain - Mariah Carey
Fly Like A Bird - Mariah Carey

I hope these help
triquetra


I need some good over you songs, or i cant take it anymore songs that would fit a description for a guy to a girl, please. (link)
Don't Forget About Us
Shake It Off
Bringin' On The Heartbreak
Never Forget You

All by Mariah Carey

I hope this helped,
triquetra


ok i know for a fact when i am sad and turn on the radio i hear a song that pertains to my exact feelings and i think that's really cool. however sometimes a song that i hate comes on and i really want to listen to a good song for what i have been feeling lately. SO.. in conclusion, does anybody know a good song that's about -> liking someone so much but you can never tell them because things always get in the way? (link)
I Wish You Knew - Mariah Carey
We Belong Together - Mariah Carey

Both are very good songs, but I think the first should be good.

triquetra


ummm.... do you have any advise on how to cope with exam stress? how to keep a cool head but still work hard enough at the same time.
Thanks (link)
A good balance of time off and work time is the best remedy I can give you. The last thing which need leading up to exams is extra emotional baggage which would distract you and other things like that. So love lives such becoming second right now, don't know if you have any or not but they need to be put on hold.

Most people would try and work flat out, but you see, that can have the regular side effects such as exhaustion and that is the last thing which you would need. So if you feel tried, don't push yourself beyond a barrier which is there to protect you.

At the weekend, take time off. That's when you are free to have a time-out and just recharge your batteries. I had to learn that the hard way, quite recently in fact.

I hope this helped and good luck in your exams!
triquetra


I really like this guy and he has a girlfriend but regardless i justfigured out he lied to me about EVERYTHING.

so im pretyy freaking hearbroken, we were bestfriends.

so what are some good songs and quotes about like getting lied to and all that?


:] thankss (link)
Bringin' On the Heartbreak - Mariah Carey
Someday - Mariah Carey
Love Takes Time - Mariah Carey
Shake It Off - Mariah Carey
Don't Forget About Us - Mariah Carey
I Stay In Love - Mariah Carey
Thanx 4 Nothin' (would choose this one personally) - Mariah Carey

I hope these help,
triquetra


I am 19, dating a 20 year old, and he is my first boyfriend. Not only that, but my first kiss, my first love, my first sex, my first everything. However, for him it is a different case. He has already told numerous girls that he loves them, and he has had sex with 11 other girls beside me within a 3 year time period (he was only in a serious relationship with 3 of those).

I feel bad, because we have been dating for 1 year 5 months but I STILL can not get over this. It disgusts me sometimes, makes me feel sad that I'm not his only, and makes me wish I had someone with less of a sexual past. People on other advice forums have constantly told me to get over myself, but the thing is it is easier to say than do. I would want so badly not to care about this because I love him, but it creeps back into my mind so often. The good thing is, I think about it less and less as the relationship progresses, but I want it to reach the point of NOTHING!!

Please don't call me selfish or tell me I need to get over myself. I dont need to hear that. I already know its crappy of me to focus on it so much. (link)
Personally, I don't think your selfish at all.

When it comes to relationships, you would want to be with somebdy who was.........'pure' I guess the word is. Somebody who loves you and only you.

Knowing what your boyfriend has done in his past is a difficult thing to get over and something like that won't leave your mind that quickly. What the other people have said to isn't right at all. Trust me, I know the feeling. The hardest thing about your 1st love is that you never forget, again, I've gone through that and I'm still dealing with the Side Effects of it.

The best thing which I think you can do right now is to talk to him about it and see where he thinks the relationship is going. I say this because the vibe which I'm getting from this is that your not happy in this relationship. Talk to him and see what you think is best for you and for him. I would first though explore every option with him and see how you can make the relationship work: the first would be that he stops talking about the past and focuses on you.

I think that this relationship can be saved, but it must come from the two of you.

Don't hesitate to drop another question in my inbox or e-mail me.

I hope this helped,
triquetra


how can you tell if someone is sad/upset but they are trying to hide their feelings?
(link)
It's never easy to tell as to what somebody is feeling, especially if they are trying to hide their feelings.

The one thing to look out for is any unusual behaviour which that person may be displaying, such as a being more quiet than usual, or not eating as much. Things like that.

Also, listen to what they talk about, if they refer to something more than once, even if it's a small refernce, then you know that something is on thier mind.

Also, look at their facial expressions. They may try to hide their feelings, but their face will give it away.

If you do find out that they are going through a touhg time, then offer to listen to them so that they can get whatever it is off their chest and talk about it. Trust me, no matter how painful it may be, the best thing to do is to talk about it because in the process of talking about it, you can begin to heal yourself.

I hope this helped,
triquetra




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