about

My name is Laura and I'm 28 years old. I live in Illinois and work as a licensed veterinary technician. I am a runner, bookworm and obviously, an animal lover.


I've been on this site since '05. I take hiatuses, but I'm never gone for good. I enjoy giving advice and I've made such lovely friends on this site that I couldn't imagine giving it up!

chat it up yo.


ps. here's my bestestestest friend.
I love him. You will too :)

advice

my boyfriend and i are starting to grow apart, weve been together for a veryy long time and were planning on getting married. but now we fight alot because i im having medical problems and get hospitalized alot and hes mentally unstable but when were together it seems like our problems pretty much disappear. he says we dont need to makeout anymore because we already love eachother but i want to still.. is there anything i can do to become as inseprable as we used to be? or anything sweet i could do or say?

You need to talk to him about it. Sit down with him and tell him how you're feeling.


You need to be open and honest with him: communication and honesty are two major, if not the two most important, aspects of a relationship. If you really do plan on getting married, you need to be able to talk to him about things that are bothering you. You need to be able to open up to him and let him know what's going on with you.


As for the making out thing, I kind of agree with him. I mean, I don't think you should cut it our completely, because like honesty and communication, intimacy is another big part of a relationship. But don't force him to do things he doesn't want to do, that will only cause more stress and tension.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

So me and this girl have been talking online a lot lately and texting, and I really like her. I'm getting some signals that she may like me back, although I'm not exactly sure. She's gone for the summer but she'll be back in about a month. Anyway, I'm kind of shy, which is why I prefer texting and chat, but people say I should call her. Do you think I should call her? What kind of stuff should I say? Does it matter if its really short or will that make her mad?

For future reference:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=532578


As for your specific situation, I think you should call her. It will show that you're confident and (obviously) that you're interested in her.


Besides, what have you got to lose? Just go for it and take a chance. Life's too short not to. And who knows, it could turn out to be the best decision you've ever made! :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

hiii; where can i find a
brasskunckle necklace in a store
in the mall like hot topic or spencers
or something like that where they would
have this necklace (click the link)
http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg86/Peace_and_Lovex3/z197477660.jpg

Try Hot Topic.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]



Okay I have been looking EVERYWHERE for pants sort of like these only not in that color

http://www.hiphopcloset.com/images/products/thumb/sweatpants.jpg

The problem is they are NOWHERE to be found and when I ask a store employee they had no clue what I was talking about! I have tried
Sports Authority, Footlocker, I've even gone to the mall and checked out Macy's, JCPenny...Nowhere to be found. I'm not asking for a website I just want to know what store I can find these at?

Thanks!

Wal-Mart has a lot of similar styles. Try there.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

This is driving me insane. The guilt is unbarable. I knew it was wrong and I did it anyways. The worst part about it is I can't stop. I tell myself I'm going to, then I find myself doing it again. I'm scared to get help. I mean, if they knew what I was doing, I thought they'd be able to keep it secret. I can't tell anyone. Instead I just wanna die. My secret will come with me, and I'll never have to worry about doing THAT again. Should I die? I'll at least see my mom...

No, you should not die. You have a purpose in life and a reason to live. It's not your time to go and you should stop thinking about suicide. Like said below, no secret is so bad that you should end your life.


You have so much left to experience, so many other people to meet, so many lives to changes. Suicide is NEVER THE ANSWER.


Tough times don't last; tough people do.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

For my tattoo, I'd like piano keys across my shoulders and a quote either above or below them. So far I found two beautiful quotes. Shakespeare's "If music is the food of love; play on." and Henry Ward Beecher's "Of all the music that reached farthest into heaven, 'twas the beating of a loving heart." Both have music and love, which is what I wanted since I am in love and love playing piano, but I just cannot pick!

I like "Of all the music that reached farthest into heaven, 'twas the beating of a loving heart."


:)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

My hair is really dry and dull looking and tends to be unmanagable. what can i do to make it more moisturized and shiny?

Try a repairing shampoo/conditioner. Go to your local hair salon or CVS and look for something that says it can repair damaged hair. Also, there are treatments you can buy. The exact name of them escapes me, but if you go to the store and ask somebody, I'm sure they'll be able to help you.


And like somebody said below, take a break from straightening and/or blow drying it.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

hi guys i have the ipod touch, and i was just wondering what some really fun free apps are that i could get? thanks!!!

Tap Tap Revolution.
Fun Facts.
Twitter.
Facebook/Myspace.
Flashlight.
FML.
Dog Whistle.
Dots.
Tic Tac Toe.


Those are just a few that my brother and I downloaded :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

my acne is sort of mild, and i wanted to know that if anyone who had pro-activ, if it is helpful? and should i buy it?

It's worked very well for me, but I've never had serious acne. Just the occasional break out.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

SO many times i have heard over and over that you cant change people. Women cant change men, men cant change women... yet I've seen it happen. Right before my eyes. How is it possible that some of us are exceptions to this rule and some of us ARE the rule???? and how would one know...

I guess I'm just looking for some insight on how this psychology of changing occurs... I would like some opinions. How is it that no matter how stubborn a person is, someone comes along that can change them...and why is it that only that person can, nobody else...
any opinions, personal philosophies, that sort of thing?

I don't think people can change other people. The only person who can change you is yourself.


I think people are constantly changing, sometimes more seriously and noticeably than others. For example, this year I changed a lot and my best friend, well, didn't. Long story short, I confronted her on it, she didn't change (because she didn't want to) and it cost us our friendship.


I guess my main point/view on this subject, is that you can only change yourself. You can't change others and others can't change you. But I also think that people are always changing, so it's not always a matter of choice. I guess it depends on the situation. Some things you can control (your actions?) but some things you can't (your maturity, etc.) I hope this makes sense.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

Junior in high school to be. 16f.

I met this guy in eighth grade and we became really good friends. We had a couple classes together. Unfortunately, when he told me he liked me the summer after eighth grade (I had liked him the first half of eighth grade whereas he liked me the second half), nothing came to be out of it since this other guy liked me at the same time, and I didn't want to hurt the other guy since he was my friend, as well. Although I don't regret making the decision that I did, I definitely have strong feelings for him again after two years; maybe it's better now than two summers ago since recently, we've discovered that we have a lot in common, and we connect better than we have ever before. We've hung out a few times this summer with our mutual friends. I leaned on his shoulder as we lay watching the fireworks on July 4th, and held onto his arm during a movie we watched together. The most memorable time with him was a couple days ago when we watched another movie, and I held onto his arm, just as I had before. In return, he put his hand on my knee. Slowly, though, he reached for my hand and interlocked fingers with me (I read online that that's a signal that he wants to be serious with you), and kept and smiling the whole time. He has complimented me before and helped me with troubles with another recent past crush (the getting over the last guy resparked my interest in this guy), saying that normal guys don't pass up girls as funny, smart, and attractive as I am. My worry is that he wouldn't ask me out again and waste time, especially since that awkwardness a few years back. I'm not ready to tell him I like him just yet, though. What do you think of the situation? Do you think anything will come to be out of it, or am I wasting my time just like on my last crush? I feel like I'm making it pretty obvious I'm interested without being pushy or forward, but is there something that I'm doing wrong or should be doing more / less of?

Well, there are 2 major options you can go about to solve this problem:


1. Be blunt about it.
2. Be shy about it.


I highly suggest being blunt about it, and either asking him if he's into you too, or simply asking him out yourself. Guys like when girls show confidence, and there's no better way to show you're confident than walking up to a guy and asking him out!


Or, you can go the other route and be shy about it, possibly doing nothing to show him you're interested in him. Sometimes, people who use this method drop subtle hints such as smiling [which is common in girls and doesn't always show you're into a guy] or having a friend ask if he's into you [this only shows that you're too shy to do it yourself]. This option is really kind of stupid, and is used all too much...


As I always say:
Life is WAY too short to not take chances and risks once in a while. Why sit around wondering what could've been, what would've been and what should've been, when you can answer all of those questions and then some by being honest and telling a boy how you really feel about him?



-Laura (17-f)

[view]

anyone know where i can get these necklaces online, or the name of them. i heard each other is suppose to stand for something different too.

thanks a lot.

http://tinypic.com/r/fp9wgl/3

Try Pacsun and Forever 21. I know Forever 21 has necklaces like that, because I was just there a few days ago and saw some.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

Hi all =) I'm kinda stuck with this guy that I really like. Usually I ask my friends for advice for this sort of stuff but they seem just as confused as I do =/ I'm sorry if this is long!

Basically I know this guy who I really like, I met him through a close friend a couple of months ago and we were just friends at first but we got close and he told my friend he liked me, and his friends told me that he had told them he liked me. So I told him I liked him and he said it back =)

anyway more to the point, lately we have just been talking and kissing, but he when I was at his house with his friends and we had been drinking, he will just go in a mood with me. I used to ignore it b/c he only does it when he's drunk and it doesn't last long. But since the last time I went to his house and he was a bit moody with me when he was drunk, he hasn't spoken to me properly. I have text him and he didn't reply so I left him to it as I gathered he was still in a mood. (His friends say he isn't in a mood with me, and that they don't understand him sometimes). So he text me days later and asked if I wanted to go to his house for some drinks but I couldn't b/c I was working that night. So I text him a day later and asked how he was, and he hasn't replied to me. Does this mean he doesn't like me? I'm so bad at telling whether guys like me, like the worst! I wish guys were simple, i'm sure you girls agree.

I'm sorry this was so long ha! What do you guys think I should do? Some people are telling me to walk away but it's easy to say that when you aren't involved. Thanx =)

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=506340


As for my opinion: I don't think you should take the whole not texting you for a day thing so seriously. Sometimes, guys just do that. Sure, it's lame, but sometimes guys are just stupid like that.


As far as whether to stay with him, I think you should talk to him about it. Part of me wants to say to stay and give him a chance, but part of me wants to say walk away because he's not worth it. So, I'd say talk to him and let him know how you're feeling, then really think about whether or not you want to stick around and/or if he's worth your time.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

I like to rent t.v series' at the movie store. I need some suggestions on what to start next. My favorites are The Wire, Jericho, Weeds, My Name is Earl, The Deadliest Catch. so if anyone can suggest some that are like any of those that would be great thanks!

LOST.
True Blood.
The United States of Tara.
Veronica Mars.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

Blessthefall
Hopes Die Last
Enter Shikari
Silverstein
The Number 12 Looks like You
Heavy Heavy Low Low
Greely Estates
Attack Attack
Oh, Sleeper
A Skylit Drive
Alesana
Emarosa
Eyes Set To Kill
Every Time I Die
Before Their Eyes
Pierce The Veil
The Devil Wears Prada
Bring Me The Horizon
A Bullet For Pretty Boy
Chiodos
A Day To Remember
Drop Dead, Gorgeous
Emery
Escape The Fate
The Fall Of Troy
Four Letter Lie
Lovehatehero
From Autumn To Ashes
From First To Last
Haste The Day
Hopesfall
I Am Ghost
In Fear And Faith
Inhale/Exhale
Norma Jean
Sky Eats Airplane
Senses Fail
Saosin
A Static Lullaby
Underoath
We Are The Ocean
With Broken Wings
Alexisonfire
As Cities Burn
The Bled
The Blackout
Scary Kids Scaring Kids

What good screamo/post-hardcore bands don't I have? Those are all the bands on my iPod.

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=532581


From there:


If you're into Screamo stuff,
similar to DANCE GAVIN DANCE or ATREYU,
try these:

- A Skylit Drive.
- Alesana.
- All That Remains.
- As I Lay Dying.
- August Burns Red.
- Bullet for my Valentine.
- Destroy the Runner.
- Drop dead Gorgeous.
- Haste the Day.
- Inept.
- Lovehatehero.
- Scary Kids Scaring Kids.
- Sky Eats Airplane.
- The Devil Wears Prada.
- Underoath.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

does eating chocolate make people feel good? personally, it does not do much for me. i dont know if i even get happy doing anything. maybe i have an endorphin dysfunction??

I guess it does that for some people. It doesn't make me feel any better. Unless it's hot chocolate on a really cold day :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

16/f

im the new kid and i no absoutly no one im going to be a junior and im pretty shy so how can i make it easier on myself so im not so nervous

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=548311


From there:


First of all, if you THINK you're going to be alone and have a pessimistic view on your potential for making friends, you will be alone.


That being said, making friends really isn't all that hard. Just talk to people! Here are a few ways you can start a conversation:

1. Compliment them.
- If they're wearing a nice pair of shoes, or some cute jeans, tell them. Let them know you like their shoes, and then ask where they got them. After that, ask if they're comfortable or something. Don't be annoying about it, but take interest in the person you're talking to, and hopefully, chances are they'll show interest back.


2. Find something you have in common.
- If they're wearing a band shirt, and it's a band you like, tell them! For example, say they are wearing a Rocket Summer shirt, say to them, "I see you have on a Rocket Summer shirt, do you like his music?" Then, after they answer, tell them your opinion on the band/artist.


3. Talk about your surroundings/where you are.
- Say it's after class and the person next to you is getting up to leave. Walk out next to him/her and comment on the class. Say something like, "That was kind of an interesting lesson." or "Was it just me, or was that lecture kind of boring?" or, if you're sitting outside on a bench, and somebody is sitting next to you, make a comment about the weather or where you are.


4. Make a joke!
- There's no better way to make friends with somebody than to make them smile/laugh. BUT don't make a joke about another person, it will make you look bad AND potentially hurt another person's feelings.


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

16/f

my boyfriend is going to be gone the rest of the summer. i won't be able to see him or talk to him that much. the only thing we have discussed about communication is writing letters. so we plan on doing that. but the thing is, i'm crazy about him. i can't describe it. i'm just so in love with him. ahhhh i dont even know exactly what i'm asking for... i just need advice on how to deal with this. how do i prevent myself from going crazy everyday without talking to him?? i feel like i might jump off a cliff if i don't talk to him. i can already predict that i'm going to cry almost everyday because i will miss him so much.

i'm also asking this- do you think i'm taking this too seriously?? because when i talked to him the past few days, and was around him, it seemed like he wasn't that upset or sad. but here i am, freaking out about how to handle myself.

i'm also scared. i'm scared that when he is away, he will find another girl. i'm scared that he will break my heart. i've never had my heart broken, and i love him sooooo incredibly much, i just don't want to lose him. what do i do???

please and thank you.

- a very confused and in-love girl.

I don't think you're taking it too seriously at all. My boyfriend lives 2000some miles away from me, so I know exactly how you're feeling.


The best thing to do is NOT dwell on the bad things, and focus on the good things. Don't think of him finding another girl (because if that's what he wanted, he wouldn't be staying with you.). Think of him having a fun time wherever he's going.


Does he have texting or any other way of communication? If so, USE IT! Take advantage of every form of communication you can find. I like the letters though, because they are much more intimate. I think they'll do nothing but help your situation.


And just remember: he's coming home soon. I know it seems like it's really far away, but every day is another day closer to seeing him again! If you need any more advice, my inbox is always open :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

I'm 17 going into my senior year of high school. I was wondering what I should do to get a girlfriend fast and easy. Be specific. I need something other than " try talking to her".

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545439


From there:


It really varies from girl to girl. Everybody has different preferences and turn ons and turn offs.
Some girls like athletes, some girls like boys in drama. Some girls like funny, outgoing and social guys, some like quiet shy bookworm guys.

Personally? I'd go for the theater guy over the basketball player, and the bookworm over the socialite. But that's just me ;]


Personality wise, here are my top 5:

1. A good sense of humor.
- A good sense of humor is always beneficial. And not a stupid "that's what she said!" sense of humor, somebody who can genuinely make an original joke. Making a girl laugh is one of the best things you can do in an effort to "win her heart".


2. Intelligence.
-Being smart is good, too. Us girls don't want to talk to somebody who can't count higher than 10, or who doesn't understand what's happening in the world. You don't have to be a total know it all, just smart enough to hold a decent conversation.


3. Nice guys.
- Nice guys DON'T finish last. If you compliment a girl, chances are she won't forget it any time soon. However, if you're mean to a girl, she'll remember for A LOT longer.


4. A good appearance.
- I'm not going to lie and don't think I'm shallow, but looks are all you have to go on for the first few minutes of knowing somebody. So if you're shirts half untucked, your shoes are untied, and your hair is unbrushed and a mess, chances are girls won't be into it.


5. Showing interest/having similar interests.
- I cannot tell you how attractive it is when I'm talking to a guy and he asks my favorite band, and the replies with, "I love The Rocket Summer, too!" Ask questions, and tell her when you like something she likes. If you have a lot in common, your relationship will go a lot farther than if you have nothing in common.


Those, however, are just the things I like but like I said, it's different for different girls. But a good sense of humor and giving a girl compliments are DEFINETE ins.



http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=541093


From there:


First of all, I'm going to say the best way to impress somebody is to be yourself. I know that's it's so cliche, but it's honestly, the best tip I or anybody can give.

I mean, you don't want somebody to start liking you for the way you think THEY want you to act or talk or dress. Why would you want somebody to like you when you're not even being yourself?


Secondly, don't be shy! Just go up and talk to that boy/girl. Confidence is key. Strike up a conversation! Start it with something like, "I see you're wearing a Hit The Lights [or whatever band/sport's team, etc] shirt, are they your favorite?" Or, something like, "So I know we've never talked before, but you seem like a really cool person..."


So be yourself, and show that you're comfortable being just that. Be comfortable in your own skin, and chances are, you'll impress everybody.



Good luck :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

Theres someone I i've just met and like, i haven't really been in a whole lotta relationships and am very shy, and maybe sorta
standoff-ish because im inexperienced, not dated frequently...as most girls my age I have friends but don't ask advice cause i don't want to talk to them about it. I want to become more comfident and calm, and actually ask him out, or get him to.
any advice about being more comfident/calm or flirting tips that subtly tell someone "i like you"? please help out...

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=541093


From there:


First of all, I'm going to say the best way to impress somebody is to be yourself. I know that's it's so cliche, but it's honestly, the best tip I or anybody can give.

I mean, you don't want somebody to start liking you for the way you think THEY want you to act or talk or dress. Why would you want somebody to like you when you're not even being yourself?


Secondly, don't be shy! Just go up and talk to that boy/girl. Confidence is key. Strike up a conversation! Start it with something like, "I see you're wearing a Hit The Lights [or whatever band/sport's team, etc] shirt, are they your favorite?" Or, something like, "So I know we've never talked before, but you seem like a really cool person..."


So be yourself, and show that you're comfortable being just that. Be comfortable in your own skin, and chances are, you'll impress everybody.


As far as the flirting portion goes, it's really not that hard. Take it slow: start with smiles and eye contact. Eye contact is a major thing in flirting. Then, move on to things like asking to hang out alone, texting him just to say good morning, commenting his picture on Facebook telling him he looks cute, etc.


Honestly though, don't stress about it too much. Flirting isn't hard and once you start doing it, you'll get used to it and you'll be a pro in no time! :)


-Laura (17-f)

[view]

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