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Reports - view
Abuse Report
Submitted: 8/11/06 1:22 by kristen22
Current Status: Closed - action taken
Report: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=440195
Question:my boyfriend is a cousin ov mine.we have been together for one year and are mad about each other.just lately we have been arguing alot and he has started to get paranoid about us been seen together. im really scared of losing him. does he love me or not?
MY ANSWER:It doesn't matter if you were brought up close together or not. What does matter is what line of cousin's is he? Your 1st? 2nd? 49th? If yall are super close, please know that in the future should you get pregnant by him, there is a higher risk for your child being born with birth defects. I can understand why he wouldn't want to be seen with his cousin in a relationship way. I'm sure he does have feelings for ya' but even he know's that it's just not right to be in a relationship with you.
THE FEEDBACK SHE LEFT ON MY COLUMN: (Rating: 1) pig ignorant bitch.no wonder this country is like it is with people like you giving advice.
-Can someone please take off the vulgar words out of the feedback? I don't think my answer deserves a 1! I just told her something she didn't want to hear but in what I thought to be, the nicest way possible. I just really want those curse words took out of her feedback. Thanks.
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Moderator Response
Submitted: by younggrandma
Reponse: Your rating has been changed to a 3 and the one who left the remarks has been banned for 120 hours for leaving offensive feedback.
If you want the feedback deleted completely remind me in a few days and I will take care of it for you.
Lets leave it until then in case she disputed her ban. Leave me a note in my inbox to remind me...I will forget. :)
(link)
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Should be all gone! Thanks for your patience. :)
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what does poision ivy look like? what does it do?? i found alot of leavy looking plants under my trampoline and i'm not sure if they are poison ivy or what?? thanks in advance (link)
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This site should help. Has pictures of what it looks like. :)
http://poisonivy.aesir.com/
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I'm reading "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn" by Betty Smith and I stumbled across a strange paragraph:
"It so happened that Professor Alegretto had a slight peculiarity concerning his girl pupils. He made them take off their shoes and stockings and stand in their bare feet while they sawed away. Instead of beating time or correcting their fingering, he spent the hour in a revery staring at their feet.
This made Evy jump. She knew nothing of Freud, and her scanty knowledge of sex did not include any of its deviations."
Back in the Victorian Age, were men like, sexually attracted to feet? (link)
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I have heard tell of men who still are. Women too.
People have all sorts of weird fetishes.
That is one of my favorites books by the way. Hope you are enjoying it. I like all her books. :)
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Hey there. About one month ago a kid i know tp'd my house and did a lot of stuff, but he also wrote with shaving cream on my driveway. it's stained now and i don't know how to get it off. is there any way to remove the stain off of cement? (link)
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Oh wow. What a rotten thing to do.
I don't know for sure what might look and I couldn't find much. I know oven cleaner will remove oil stains. I don't know if shaving cream is oil based or not but you might try it in a small area and see what happens. :)
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Ok, this is really embarrassing, but I really need to stop! Ok, well I'm going to be 15 in a couple of weeks, and I still suck my thumb. I've been doing it ever since I was born, and I still haven't stopped. It's becomming a really bad habbit and I want to quit more than anything! I suck my thumb not just when I'm scared, but a lot! When I sleep, when I'm watching TV or something, all the time. But when I spend the night at a friend's house or I have a friend over, I can usually sleep with out it, it just takes me longer to fall asleep. I have tried to prevent myself from sucking it when I sleep, but it isn't helping. I remember my one teacher said that her friend is about 25 and she still sucks her thumb. I don't want to become that kind of person. I really want to stop! This is really embarrassing, and I'm sorry for saying this, but I just really need some help. Thanks so much! (link)
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Well that would be a real hard habit to break. I have found an article here that claims since sucking your teeth has serious affects on your teeth a dentist could put a brace like thing behind your teeth to help you stop. It might work.
http://www.healthmantra.com/thumbsuck.htm
This is a problem you may want to talk to your doctor about. He/she may be able to give you some better tips than I can. I have read that other than it perhaps causing problems with your teeth it is
just a comfort thing. Some say if it doesn't cause a problem don't worry about it. So talk to your doctor and see what they might do for you.
Good luck. :)
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Okay... so let me give you the background info. I'm gay and my partner is bi but he "prefers guys over girls." It is both our first relationship in a male-male preference and the problem i'm having is that it seems as if we're not really that close... in the sense that we've been going out for over a month we've been on 6 dates 2 of which sucked because parental issues and we haven't seen each other for about a week and a half... We haven't done anything kissing, cuddling, any of the sort the only type of body contact we've had is just hugging before either one of us leaves to go home... we're both UBER shy but when we're talking online it's like a whole different world/conversation... in the sense of both of us being really "sexual." He's homeschooled and I go to school. I don't start school until the 29th and this week he doesn't have any work so we promised each other that we are going to see a lot of each other before I start school. The problem is that I don't know whether or not this relationship is really worth it because I really like him, I think he really likes me... I just don't know exactly where this is going and I asked him what he thinks and he gave me the generic answer of "wherever we want it to go." Pretty cheesy huh? I've been having some thoughts lately of either breaking up with him or asking if he would consider an open relationship... I just need some help.. Give me some advice! Oh yeah.. he lives 30 minutes away from me and I think that's more of a problem to him than it is for me... So yeah.. if you need anymore information on my situation feel free to message me. (link)
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It doesn't sound as if you are really interested at the moment. It may just be because you haven't spent a lot of time together, it may be because you were only meant to be friends.
If after you spend some time together this week you just don't feel real attracted to him, I think you had better just be friends. When you meet the right guy for you....there will be no doubts in your mind at all.
If you are both pretty young a lot of the attraction you have for each other may be just the fact that you don't have to hide anything from each other. That is a comfort and a freedom you may not be able to have with other people you know. I don't know your situation.
For that reason alone I think you should remain friends. If it never progresses to anything more
you at least have that.
Good Luck! :)
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how old were you when you lost your virginity?? and were you married?? (link)
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17 and no. He is the one I married though.
Way to go HollDiOR. :)
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hi, well im 14 and a guy. i have medium legnth hair, thats kind of thick and curly. i want the back of my hair to stand up, like be spikey and not fall but it just wont happen! i dont know if its the hair or the dozens of products ive tried it with. any advice? (link)
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I don't know the style you are going for but this
site tells how to put liberty spikes in your hair.
They may not be the style you are going for but whatever they use to make them stand up would probably work for other styles too. :)
http://www.wikihow.com/Put-up-a-Mohawk-or-Liberty-Spikes
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My oldest and best friend is moving to Ethiopia later this week. His parents had a leaving party tonight and as I am going away tomorrow it was the last time I will see him for the forseeable future.
At the party my other best friend (female) got upset and her younger sister accused the friend moving away's dad of feeling her up. My female friend's older sister then said that he had also felt her up. The man they accused is also their dad's best friend, and they were in hysterics. I heard them telling their dad and then the whole family went home.
Both my best friends were involved, so obviously I was very upset by this situation. The friend moving away is convinced that it was all just a big misunderstanding but I have no idea what to believe. I was already upset from having to say goodbye to him, and I don't know what to do.
One best friend is accusing my other best friend's dad of sexually abusing her siblings. I'm trying to stay out of it because it's none of my business, but it's not as simple as that.
What am I supposed to do? (link)
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I agree with all the previous advisers. I would just like to add that it would probably do good for your
friend who is leaving if you gently remind your girlfriends that it was his dad who allegedly did them wrong, not your friend.
I am sure your male friend is in denial that it happened, and I'm sure he is embarrassed beyond belief.
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well im 14 and my bf is 15 turning 16 soon. we've been going out for a good eight months, and we've become really close, our relationship is amazing. he does everything in the world for me, and noone or anything could ever explain how much he means to me or i mean to him. its just that sometimes he gets alittle bit to attached. like i feel like i need some space, or he needs to become less attached. because it has not only been me who has brought up that he is constantly all over me, my friends have also brought it to my attention. then like sometimes not all the time, i think about his friend who i find apeeling at times, but not all the time. i mena i find him attractive and fun to talk to. like if i hook him up with other girls i kind of get jealous. almost as if i wanted my byofriend, and my byofriends friend both for myself. im unsure, so please help me ? (link)
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Well actually at 14 you should be dating all kinds of different guys. Its really a little young to just be dating one guy.
Your current boyfriend probably really likes you. Some guys his age are just a little immature. He wants to let everyone know he has a girlfriend.
Just talk to him and tell him you are really uncomfotable with all the clingy stuff. Especially in public. Tell him you mean no offense but could he please tone it down a little.
As for his friend. You probably do have an attraction to him. There isn't really anything wrong with that since as I said you are young and will be attracted to many guys before you meet Mr Right. If you feel you need some space and need to date more guys just tell your boyfriend you feel that you are to young to be tied to one guy. He will either let you go and remain friends or he won't. If his friend want to take you on a date then go for it. Just beware that the friend may not want to date you if you break up with his friend. Some guys are weird that way.
Good luck. :)
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hey,
i'm having troubles with my friends at school. i try to be nice to them. i offer homework help, and when nobody wants to sit with them, i do. but they always seem to make a face and walk away. i've had a friend since 5th grade and she's always there for me. is it better to have one true friend than just a bunch of people who might not like you? (link)
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Well I think it is. So long as you have someone to talk to and dream with one is enough.
It sounds to me as if you have tried very hard to be friends with these other people. So they must just be a little snobby. Stick with your one true friend and if the others want to be friends, let them come to you. :)
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Ok this month my girlfriend got her period early and this week she is taking the sugar pills and she and i want to know if it is still safe to have sex while she is on the sugar pills? (link)
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It is OK. The sugar pills are just to keep her in the habit of taking them. If they simply said don't take them for 5 days (or however many days the sugar pills last, been awhile!) Then some girls/women would forget what day they were supposed to take them again or they might forget.
Long explanation but basically they just want us to remember to take them everyday. You can have sex anytime so long as she is on the pill and taking it correctly. :)
***EDIT***
Yes it is safe to have sex. So long as she is on the pill and taking it everyday...even the sugar pills, You can have sex whenever you want as often as you want. You never have to worry about it again. :)
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Hey iam on the low carb diet and i was just wondering how many carbs does okra and squash have? (link)
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I found a chart and it gives the carbs and then net carbs of foods. Since you probably know better than I what number you're wanting I will send you the link! :)
The carb listings for individual foods is the yellow column on the left side of the page.
http://www.carbs-information.com/carbs-in-food.htm
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My boyfriend is 16 years old has real bad family problems. He is often depressed and thinks about suicide a lot. He tells me that if I weren't in his life he would have already killed himself and that if we broke up he will probably kill himself. We have been dating for 3 years. How can I tell if he is being serious about killing himself? I'm afraid that if we break up that he is going to kill himself, so I feel obligated not to end the relationship. What do I do? (link)
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Sometimes suicidal people are serious and occasional
one will use it as a control thing.
The best thing you can do is pass the responsibility
of watching him to someone else. Tell his parents. If not his parents then a school counselor or some other adult you can trust to get him help. Then leave.
If he ultimately does something stupid it won't be your fault. You cannot take responsibility for someone else's life. That's much to big a burden for you to carry.
Don't let this control your life. Do what you need to do for yourself. :)
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I am seriously getting stressed here! My best friend told me yesterday that she was through with life and she wanted to kill herself! I've been through this before with another one of my friends. It turned out that that friend wasn’t going to commit suicide she was just really depressed but I had told someone. Now it’s happening again with a different friend so I told my mom this time. I let her read the conversation we had and then my mom was just like "All I see here is a very angry child trying to get attention." I don’t see it that way though. My mom had said that out of the 100% of people that say there going to commit suicide, 98% don’t and 2% do. My friend said that sometime before high school is over she's going to kill herself. I have 4 years to convince her not to, but I tried a ton yesterday. She said its not helping and that I shouldn’t be her friend anymore. I love being her friend and I understand that she's trouble from home life (her mother doesn’t trust her!
Her brother doesn’t like her, and her dad abused her but has stopped). What should I do? I really don’t want my friend to kill herself but she doesn’t understand that! (link)
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You need to tell her parents or some other trusted adult in her life. I know you want to help her but
it is taking its toll on your life and that isn't fair.
I don't know the actual statistics and they really don't matter. The real fact is you can't take the chance that she WON'T do it. You would never forgive yourself if she did.
Depression does lead to suicide and if this friend is depressed like your other friend then getting help for that depression is very important.
What it boils down to is that you cannot carry this burden by yourself. Tell someone. If you think her family wouldn't get her help then talk to a counselor at school or someone other adult that can help you help her.
Read onemans column. I believe you have the link.
if he doesn't respond to the inbox question in a
couple of days, email him. He is very good. :)
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I have been with my partner for over 4 years and have known deep down he has a problem. He is a compulsive liar. It is scary to think about he has lied to me about but I still stick with him through thick and thin. He has lied about having a twin brother, he has lied about his brother having HIV, he has lied about his grandparents dying, he has stolen thousands of pounds from me and tried to lie to get his way out of that too. He has lied about so many things I dont know what is true anymore. I want to help him but feel I dont know how much longer I can take being like this. I do love him and want to help him but dont know how. Every time I try to talk to him about things he looses it and end up beating me up or trashing our flat. He has said he has seen councellors but they haven't helped. Being in the UK, I don't know who to turn to for help? Or should I just get the hell out of here? But how if I live with him? It's just so complicated! (link)
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We have a psychologist who has a column on our site.
He only answers inbox questions so if you would like to contact him I bet he could be lots of help.
http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=OneMan
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My mom's mood is very unpredictable. She can sometimes be very delusional, abusive, and irrational. I know that she was abused when she was younger but she refuses to talk about it with anyone, she hasn't even told me. I also know that schizophrenia runs in my family. I think that she has some kind of mental illness and I want her to get help. If not she will just keep driving me and her boyfriend away from her with her mistreatment. I just don't know how to convince her to get help and admit she has a problem. If she doesn't get help soon I'll be forced to leave her. I can't stand the way she treats me. Please help me. (link)
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I think your best answer would come from this columnist. He is a psychologist and answers questions that get sent to his inbox. If he doesn't
respond in a couple of days then he does have his email listed on his column. :)
http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=OneMan
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Im a female and Im 15 years old. Me and my boyfriend had sex yesterday and it was my first time. And it was unprotected sex and I was on my period. Is there a higher risk now that I could get pregrant? (link)
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The chances of you getting pregnant while on your period are the same as if you weren't. Unprotected sex causes pregnancy. :)
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I recently got a photo contract with playboy magazine. they wanted me to be nude... with nothing on... and nothing covering me. i acceptedd... because i need the money. i told them i was 20. but i have a secret. i am only 13 =). i have DD boobs... and quite a large downstairs. do you think i will get in trouble with like the law if they find out im 13. helpp=[
the photoshoot is in 4 days. on monday (link)
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For one thing Playboy didn't become a big business
by hiring 13 year olds. This question is ridiculous.
IF a magazine wanted you to pose nude at 13 yes, they would be in big trouble. By the time the lawyers were through with them they would no longer exist. Any "reputable", if there is such a thing, adult magazine would check every resource in the world before hiring anyone who even remotely appears under 30. They don't take the chances you are describing.
How would a 13 year old even be contacted by these people? Isn't like you drove yourself and I doubt a parent would drive you.
Big boobs are great. Enjoy them. A large "downstairs"? What do you mean by that? Don't think that is anything to be bragging about.
Come on child, stop asking ridiculous questions. The majority around here are not that stupid. :)
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i have to go to the doctors tomorrow, and they always make me pee in a cup, what do they find out from your pee? (link)
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Lots of things. They can see if you're pregnant, If you have blood in your urine, if it contains sugar,
if you have an infection, and lots of other things.
A lot of times, unless it is just somehting simple being tested, A urine test is just a tool the doctor uses to see what OTHER tests you might need. :)
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