|
Friend's dad
My oldest and best friend is moving to Ethiopia later this week. His parents had a leaving party tonight and as I am going away tomorrow it was the last time I will see him for the forseeable future.
At the party my other best friend (female) got upset and her younger sister accused the friend moving away's dad of feeling her up. My female friend's older sister then said that he had also felt her up. The man they accused is also their dad's best friend, and they were in hysterics. I heard them telling their dad and then the whole family went home.
Both my best friends were involved, so obviously I was very upset by this situation. The friend moving away is convinced that it was all just a big misunderstanding but I have no idea what to believe. I was already upset from having to say goodbye to him, and I don't know what to do.
One best friend is accusing my other best friend's dad of sexually abusing her siblings. I'm trying to stay out of it because it's none of my business, but it's not as simple as that.
What am I supposed to do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Be there as a listening ear for all of your friends but keep your opinions to yourself. This is a really big deal so your friends (all of them) really need a friend right now who won't go and tell everyone what is said in confidence. I would encourage them to contact the authorities, as this type of thing is rarely ever a "big misunderstanding".
]
Dont make their problems your problems,
let them sort it out, since you have no evidence or anything or dont know anything really but what they told you, stay out of it.
And if they ask you to take sides, tell them you just want to be left out of it.
And just enjoy the time you had with your friend who is moving, and try not to worry about their problems, sooner or later it will all be sorted out.
]
I agree with all the previous advisers. I would just like to add that it would probably do good for your
friend who is leaving if you gently remind your girlfriends that it was his dad who allegedly did them wrong, not your friend.
I am sure your male friend is in denial that it happened, and I'm sure he is embarrassed beyond belief.
]
These are really serious accusations. The best thing for you to do is to be a good friend to all of your friends by not giving an opinion on the sitation at all. Listen to them when they need to talk and be there as a friend but don't choose a side as you can't know what really happened.
Often in these situations what each person is saying is not the whole truth, when you have 2 sides to a story the truth is usually somewhere in the middle.
This is a tough spot to be in but by the time you get back from being away the whole thing may have died down and not be such a hot topic.
Hope this helps, and feel free to message me with any futher questions.
]
for the most part you should stay outof this but be there for emotional support your ethiopia best friend is gonna need to work this all out in his head and decide if he believes it and dont say anything just be there for him.your other friend will probably side with her sisters and you will need to be there for her too.it is gonna be really hard for you but you will get through it hope i helped
you can email me anytime seriously
tell me how it goes and how you aare doing
~nikki~
lalagurly
]
You are correct about staying out of it as much as possible. You may have an opinion about who is the most trustworthy, but try to keep it to yourself. I believe in innocent until proven guilty, but it sounds like two against one in this case. The man is moving and it is doubtful that any legal action will be taken, anyway. You need to try to not let the situation affect your friendships which are important to maintain. If someone is forcing you to take sides, then they are being selfish. No one can expect you to choose sides based on emotions only, when you don't know the facts for certain.
]
More Questions: |