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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

I need to know what jobs can i apply for if im 14???

Short answer to your question is that there are very few if any jobs available to someone your age. Child labor laws prohibit someone your age working at regular type employment. Jobs available to you are the more traditional teenage jobs such as babysitting and yard work.

If you live in the USA then the federal Child labor laws come into play. These laws are adopted by each state and enforced not only to the federal standards but to standards set forth by different states. An example would be farming states allow children of the farm owner to work in the fields during the harvest as long as they are not working the machinery. They have to be at least a specific age, generally 16 to drive or work machinery.

The Federal law states you must be 16 and have state working papers to work at normal jobs. These working papers are normally given out by you High School principals office. These working papers spell out to your employer the amount of hours in a week you can work, the days of the week you can work and how many hours a day you can work.

Hiring someone under 18 without working papers is a serious violation of the child labor laws. Any employer doing so can be fined and his or her business is subject to being shut down.

Basically it's always just been my mum & I at home.
But for ten years she's been married to my stepdad. He's the only guy of hers I've ever liked. He was like a dad to me.

I'm 17, and going to university next year.
My mum & stepdad split up two months ago. I won't go into details, but it was messy, and I was there for all of it. It was horrible.

When they were together, my mum never really 'went out'. She met her best friend for coffee every now and then.

But since they broke out she goes out every weekend and a lot of weeknights. She goes to the pub or god knows where else (she often doesn't tell me) and doesn't come home until 4am sometimes, when I'm sat up waiting for her, upset.

If I ever confront her about going out so much all I get is 'grow up, you're 17!'. And other comments. She thinks I'm totally unreasonable. What she doesn't understand is that I'm not used to being sat at home waiting for her. Before, my mum was always around for me. Everything has changed very quickly. Not only that, but she has been meeting men and Lying to me about where she's going. It's hard for me because I loved my stepdad for 10 years.

She doesn't ever want to do anything with me, even when I offer. She'll lie and say she can't afford to go anywhere with me but then she will go out to the pub. There have been times when I've cried and begged her to stay with me and she just thinks I'm being silly. But I am an only child with no other family and she's all I have.

I understand that I'm 17 and maybe need to be more independent. But this has all happened very fast for me. And I still need a mum.

This is a hard question to answer not knowing your mom but I will give it a try.

Your mom having gone through what you have called a messy divorce, what you are now seeing may be a reaction to the divorce. Then she may also be looking forward to be alone when you go off to University and reacting to that as well.

The divorce had to have been hurtful to mom. So it would be expected that there would be some form of adverse reaction to it. Some people crawl inside themselves and hide from the world. Your mom has chosen to shall we say go out and party.

Is this the right thing for her to do? I really can't or shouldn't say. Your mom is a responsible adult, free to do as she pleases with in reason. You are above the age of consent if you are from Great Britain and will soon be an adult. Still I understand your concern and your feeling of being alone.

Knowing all this is the easy part. What you can do or say to your mom is the hard question to answer. You have tried begging and of course that didn't work. Have you tried having a calm rational discussion where you explain how concerned you are for her and for her safety? This is a hard discussion to have if she will not discuss this with you.

The only alternative would be to turn to a close relative say an Aunt or Uncle, her sister or brother or maybe her parents if they are still alive. Tell them what is going on and maybe they can speak to her.

As I said this may be just a reaction to a bad divorce and she will come to her senses soon. We can only hope so. Unfortunately I live in the U.S. and do not know any of the laws where you live so I cannot advise you in that area. You might want to talk to one of your trusted teachers or the headmaster of your school. I'm sure they would know what agency you could turn to for help.

I just need to know if there are birth control pills to be taken by patiens who are on ARVs.

This is a question that should be asked of your AVRs prescribing doctor. If you are taking ARVs medication because you have been exposed to the HIV/AIDS virus then you should be using a condom and your partners should know of your HIV status before intercourse.

Hi, I'm 20/f && my boyfriend is 22. This weekend we had sex for the first time. The first time we had intercourse, he lasted a few minutes. He exclaimed that I had the best he has ever had or tasted, blah blah blah. Well the next day, we were fooling around and I went down on him, and then we proceeded with intercourse. Like, this was a lot more rough than the first (he called it love making; second time was fucking..whatever) everything was great, then he pulled out, and I could hear it in his voice how upset he was, but he said that he didn't know what the problem was but he couldn't keep it hard and I'm the only girl he's ever done with that. I was crushed, automatically assumed the worst. Neither one of us knows why it happened. He claimed it had nothing to do with me, that it was him and was literally boohoo crying. :(

He said his stressed about his daughter && the fact that he has to leave in 12 hours to go back to Michigan ( long distance relationship, for now)

But idk what to believe. He gets so turned in around me, he swears he wasn't lying about being the best he's ever had, but idk..

Is it normal? Is it me? Could stress cause it?

Btw, we did have several shots of vodka, but he said he wasn't buzzed or anything..

This happens to the best of us and when it does it is embarrassing for us. We can't explain why and the women automatically assumes there is something wrong with her.

The problem has little if anything to do with the woman and all to do with the male. Alcohol, stress, medications and other factors can cause this problem. There could even be environmental problems such as the sent of the sheets triggering a reflex or memory from long ago.

As long as the problem does not recur over and over again he should be fine. Your part in this problem is to be supportive as his ego has been damaged. Yes this may not have happened before though the circumstances that caused it to happen may not have been in place before either.

If he is truly concerned that he has a problem then suggest he see his doctor. Though if this is a one time occurrence I do not think he should be that concerned. I will say if he continues to be concerned he will suffer performance anxiety and it will happen again.

You and he have to understand that this will happen on occasion during the course of a mans life through no real fault of either of you. When it does the woman's job is to be supportive. Let him rest and try again on another night. Only if it happens frequently is it time to see a doctor.

i am 39 and my gf is 28 are we can date in a hotel?? is police can punish

You are adults and may do as you please. As long as the gf consents to going to a hotel with you and is consenting to whatever takes place (sex) in the hotel room. There is no reason for police to be involved.

Of course the answer is based on laws in the United States. Laws in other countries may differ.

Okay let's just say I'm 32 years old, I've been married to only 1 man the whole time. But since we'd been married 6 years. I've had numerous partners. See when we first got together it was just us 2, until I couldn't deal with being with a virgin. So we started having an open marriage., except my side was open as his was more less closed.
Everytime he wanted to see another woman I got in the way of it all. Then we started being seperated again just recently because of my appetite I can't go very long without it and if I do, I just go crazy. Wanting, needing and longing for it all the time. My question is what do I do? Stay married or keep sleeping around and having an open marriage?

I would say that this is a question that really has to be answered between you and your husband. If he is okay with having an open marriage then I see no reason for a divorce.

Just remember one thing about an open marriage. It is a two way street. what is good for the goose is good for the gander. You said; Every time he wanted to see another woman I got in the way of it all." This is not right." This is not an open marriage, this is having affairs under the guise of an open marriage.

From what you have written I take it your husband was a virgin when you married. His sex drive may not be what yours is a this time which given the age you have given is normal. A women at 32 has a higher sex drive then a man at the same age. One of mother natures nasty little tricks.

Still there are some things you should be doing to make your sex life with your husband better. Sex like everything else is a learned experience. Since you are the more experienced lover you should be teaching your husband what you like. Everything from how you like to be touched, oral sex and your favorite positions. You should be asking him how he likes to be touched, experiment with him to see what causes him to moan and move about the bed.

What is most important is anything that happens between two consenting adults in the privacy of their home and bedroom is absolutely okay. The key word(s) is consenting and consensual. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. So if you want to try say anal sex, or some light BDSM or other fetishes or fantasies this is fine. Just as long as you both agree to it. Any hesitation on eithers part and you don't do it.

As a virgin he may be missing out on a great deal of good sex if you have not taken the time to show him what you need in the way of se. In the doing so you are also teaching him there is more to a sex life than the missionary position.

In short just going by what you have written. I believe you are being one sided here. You can have a better sex life with you husband if you take the time to show him what you need and teach him to be a better lover. If you do this an open marriage may not be needed. Certainly divorcing him be cause of a poor sex life will not be needed.

If I missed the mark here it is only because I keyed in on the fact that your husband was a virgin when you married.

I'm a 13 year old girl, and I want to do something I find fun with other like minded people. Any suggestions?

Would this be an after school club that would meet in school as an extracurricular activity or club. If so one of the first things you would need to do is find a teacher willing to act as the club's advisor so you could meet after school on school grounds. After that how you form the club remains about the same.

Since this will be your club to form what I suggest you do is start by sitting down and make a list of things and subjects you might want to form a club around. If your thinking is to form some type of academic club then list those subject you are most interested in. If you want to form a club for activities or hobbies then list those activities and hobbies you like.

Once you have a list number the items on your list or lists in order of which you like the most down to the ones that are less liked. Take the number one item and make a poster on 8 1/2 by 11 paper announcing the formation of your club. Make sure to put on the poster the age group of who you want to join, how to contact you as well as when and where the club will
meet. Then post these posters on free bulletin boards at school, the grocery stores and on telephone and light poles in your neighborhood.

Depending on the response you receive you may have to make a second poster or more until you get enough people to form your club.

Hope this helped.

Female, 18

Here is the list of pros and cons I made:

Pros of being with him

1.I know I love him. He loves me. We’re a happy family.
2. He treats me right.
3. He makes me laugh.
4. He would never intentionally hurt me.
5. I can tell him things.
6. I know he’ll love me unconditionally.

Cons of being with him

1. He makes me feel insecure.
2. He could potentially stab me in the heart.
3. Distance
4. Not sure if he's the one with me.

I tried being with him. We loved each other a lot. But the main issue was him making me feel insecure and hurt (maybe irrationally, but hurt nonetheless). I eventually ended things. He was hurt because he didn't think I had a proper reason for breaking up with him. We've hung out as friends since, and now I feel like I'm in the same place I was 6 months ago. I feel like I'm falling deeper and deeper in love with him. And I know he's never stopped loving me. (Btw he's 22.) We are long distance btw, so that's always a consideration.

Please give me some advice. I'm so conflicted!

At your age love can some times be fickle as in confusing. It is almost like being in love for the first time all over again. In on sense it is.

You have been through the High school teenage romances where some girls go through boyfriends faster than weeks change on the calendar. It is very rare that a high school romance ends up in marriage.

Now at 18 you are an adult and romance takes on a new meaning. You are still looking to go out and have a good time but the end game here is to find a life partner. Before you were in a sense understudying for this portion of your life. Now the game is real and it is harder to walk away from someone when the heart and mind are in conflict.

The pros on your list are all good ones, everything you could want in a man though missing a few that should be there such as will he be a good provider. Does he have a good work ethic. What type of a father might he be. You might add these to one of the lists if you know the answer.

On the Con side of you list 3 out of the four stand out as red flags to me. The first one; "He makes me feel insecure," Is the biggest red flag. If you cannot feel secure and comfortable with him then this is not a good match.

Comfort and security are the two biggest potions of a marriage. If you are not comfortable with each other and secure in the knowledge that your partner will not harm you, will care for you and in all ways look out for you. Then everything else, including great sex, will not hold your marriage together making this person a poor choice for a life partner. You can be great friends, you just may not be able to live together as man and wife.

Number 2 is included in what I wrote above and the above is also the reason why you wrote number 4. As for distance. There are ways to overcome the problems of distance. Your problem is items I, 2 & 4. If these were not present in your mind you would find away in you thinking you would find away to overcome.

There is one other reason for number 4; that is that you may not be ready to settle down yet. Which I would agree is something you should give serious consideration to. You have time to play the field before you settle down. Statistically the older you are when you marry the more solid your marriage will be.

It would be wrong for any of us to tell you to stay with him or to find someone else. This has to be your decision. What I will say is within the list of pro's and cons you have written is your answer and I believe you see this. You're looking for confirmation of that thought. I will go as far as this: You have done correctly in this instance in putting your thoughts down as you have. Now trust your instincts and go with the decision you see before you.

pragnancy test kit is 100% true result?

More like 85% to 90%. Always take a second test 5 to 10 days later. If you get the same results then the results are more like 99% accurate.

Always follow the package directions as to when to test. If you get a positive test result twice, follow up with your doctor for a medical test.

i am 11 and so wanna have sex cos i masturbate a lot
and watch porn vids. as a birthday prezzie my bf gave me a sex toy which is basically meaning do you wanna have sex hes 11 too and i felt his penis what do i do

The first two advisers have given you could advise so I will go in a different direction.

They both wrote about how being so young sex would hurt a lot. The reason for this is even if you have started through puberty and your body may have started to develop. Your sex organ, your vagina, has not developed to the point it is ready to accommodate a male penis. Your finger, maybe?

I doubt you read the newspaper articles concerning things that happen in foreign countries. So let me tell you the story behind an article out of India where their Parliament is putting forth a law to outlaw underage marriage.

While most of us see India as a fairly western country there are portions of the country that are quite tribal. Where children as young as 8 can be married off to grown men. This is done by their fathers for money, huge sums to them but pennies to you and me.

Recently it was reported that a young child not much younger than you, was married to a much older man On her wedding night she bled to death after her husband, for lack of another term, raped her in consummating their marriage. You see her vagina was not capable of intercourse and yours is probably not either.

The earlier in life you have sex the more painful it will be because your vagina has not become elastic enough to accept a penis comfortable. Also it is not necessary to bleed the first time you have sex if your vagina is ready for sex.

Rule of thumb here would be if you cannot comfortably insert a Tampon you are probably not ready physically for sex.

There is nothing wrong with masturbation. You won't get pregnant from it and you will not get and STDs either. What you will do is satisfy the sexual urges brought on by puberty in a safe comfortable manner in the privacy of your bedroom.

Is it okay to date older man 12 years difference

Not knowing your age adds a degree of difficulty to answering this question.

First part of answer: If you are under 18 then the quick answer is; no it is not okay to date someone 12 years older than you. In fact if you are under the age of consent in your state it is also illegal for him to date you. He can be charged with Statutory Rape which has nothing to do with whether or not you have sex with him. It is the mere fact that you are dating and sex could have occurred. Another charge would be contributing to the delinquency of a minor and given the difference in ages between you two charges related to pedophilia and being a pedophile. Then there is the added federal charge of violating the Mann Act if you two ever crossed the state line.

For someone 12 years older then someone 18 or younger sends up huge red flags to all adults and law enforcement. These people are in most every case a child pedophile. If you are 18 or younger check the National sex registry for this person both by the name he is using and the address he lives at. If he is registered notify local law enforcement of your contact with him.

Second part of answer: If you are over 18 then the answer becomes somewhat simpler. At 18 you are consider an adult free to date anyone you please. Age can at that point simply become a number. There are still some red flags to consider. Such as why someone age 30 or old or older would be interested in a young teenage girl. Pedophilia is still a possibility.

There are in this scenario no legal repercussions for him in dating you, I'm of course assuming you are a girl. You though could still be in danger and should use all methods available to you to check him out as your safety could be at risk.

Last and final part of answer: Once you reach legal age, which is 18. You and you alone are responsible for your actions. Mom and dad may not like what you do though there is little they can do to stop you. You're past the age of any parental discipline they could once inflict upon you as corrective action. Though as good parents I'm sure they will be there to help you if you fall.

Since I do not know your age I can not give you a truly decisive answer except in part one of the three parts I wrote. Though somewhere in those three parts based on your age I believe you will find your answer.

If you are over 18 or under 21 I do advise caution in dating older men. They have their reasons for dating younger women which are not always honorable and you can be hurt emotionally as well as possibly physically.

can you find somthing unique.

You need to be a little more specific before any of us can help you. Unique about what?

I am in the 12th grade, worrying about the future of course. I've been looking into this and trying to see what I want. Recently the idea of taking a year off was brought to my attention. Everyone I have asked has thought it is a terrific idea and they had wished they'd done it. I'm afraid that after my four years my life will be in a place where I wouldn't want to leave where I am because I would be beginning working. I would love to, more than anything, go backpacking through Europe and maybe even take a literature class in Athens. My father on the other hand feels it is a horrible idea and we don't have the money (even though I plan on getting jobs where I can and figuring that out on my own. I also have a job now) I guess what I need is not so much an answer but an opinion from someone more experienced is incredibly needed.

This is a really hard question to answer as it requires a better knowledge of just who you are. For instance if I knew you better I would know if this is an excuse to get out of going to college or if you are burnt out and need a break.

Your fathers feeling that this is a horrible idea doesn't tell me much when you add to it that "we don't have the money." What I'm asking is; If he had the money would he think differently about what you want to do? Your father knows you and based on my question if money was not the issue then does he see your desire as someone who is trying to avoid college or someone who needs a break from studying?

That to me this is the crux of your question. Not knowing what you want at your age is somewhat normal. Taking a year off and working or back packing through Europe to find yourself will most likely not give you any answers.

What will give you answers as what the future may hold for you. What course of studies to follow in college. These questions can be answered while in high school by working with your class advisor.

There are many different things in this world that can give you direction other than what you learn in High School For my son I was once told by one of his teachers that it might be good if he learned how to ask if they wanted to super size that order.

When he left high school he joined the Army. They taught him what High School didn't. While on leave he visited his high school, with me in tow, and his teacher(S) was very surprised to see him with his Medals and Ribbons as well as his rank equivalent to Corporal only one year after leaving High School.

One was even more surprised when she was evolved in a traffic accident several years later and finds herself being cared for by a paramedic who quite strangely lookeed like my son. She asked if he was my son and he said yes Mrs. XXXX I will take good care of you. After leaving the Army he went to College and not only earned his Paramedic Degree but earned a degree in Emergency Medicine. He is now a Paramedic/Firefighter a job he dreamed of for many years.

I've told you this story for one reason. You are not alone in possible feeling lost at this time. My son like you felt the same way and was not getting any support from school. He joined the military and truth be known he just may have gotten more from them then they got from him. Fact is there are many alternatives to back packing through Europe that can help you figure out what you want to do in life. The military was my sons answer and savior. It may or may not be yours.

My suggestion is this: If you do not feel you are ready for college then you may not be. Taking a year off and back packing is not going to help you find yourself. Find a more productive way to spend that year. away that may help you find your true calling in life.

21/f

I'm beginning to think something is seriously wrong with me. I've have been intimate with 4 guys && none of them could last longer than 4 minutes max (and I think that might be a generous number, could be less, definitely not more). They all but 1 have had sex with a couple of people a piece and said I'm the only girl they have climaxed with that fast. My ex && I (he was a virgin) had sex and for the whole 2 years of our relationship, he would only last 2 whole minutes! After we broke up, he had sex with several other women & a couple told me he was the longest lasting man they've had. We ended up hooking up one night, (I was excited to be able to have sex wit him longer than 2 minutes) and not even 3 minutes later, he busted. His face was full of disappointment. He said "you are the only girl that makes me bust that fast"

Like my new boyfriend, said I had nothing to worry about because I told him my sex life in the past was awful due to disappointment; believe it or not, he only lasted not even 4 minutes. I haven't been able to have sex since (that was 3 months ago). What is wrong with me? Why can't guys last that long with me?

:(

According to a recent study your normal.(see excerpt below) The average length of intercourse befor ejaculation accrues is 3 to 7 minutes.

Reasons I can think of where your partners are on the short side of average could be:

1. As Razhie wrote that you are tight and have great muscle control.

2. To much foreplay

3. Your foreplay is better than other partners these men have been with.

4. This is meant as a compliment from a male point of view. You may be downright more sexy then other women.

The sexier the women the faster the guy is going to be. Learn to slow your partner down. Let him give you more pleasure during foreplay & try pleasuring him first then allowing him to pleasure you before intercourse. This will allow him to cool a bit before intercourse.

The following is the Study excerpt:

According to the new study "Canadian and American Sex Therapists' Perceptions of Normal and Abnormal Ejaculatory Latencies: How Long Should Intercourse Last?" adequate coitus lasts anywhere from three to seven minutes, not including the Pledge of Allegiance. This data, from all the normal people who see therapists for sexual problems, corresponds closely to earlier studies, which put the average at five to seven minutes. (We can safely blame the two-minute discrepancy on the Canadians.)

"Very few people have intercourse per se [Latin for by thrust] that goes longer than 12 minutes," says sex therapist Barry W. McCarthy. Essentially, ejaculatory inhibition, which is also called "delayed orgasm" or "junkie orgasm," has less to do with actual time than an inability to ejaculate when you'd like. And premature ejaculation, which is also called "rapid ejaculation" or "your ejaculation," refers to intercourse that lasts less than a minute or two.

McCarthy says you can slow things down by honing your technique through what he calls "non-intercourse sex" (what the rest of us call "jerking off"). You also might want to try switching positions and varying the speed and pattern of your thrusts, and then you might attain the required 18-minute minimum no legitimately normal person ever fails to meet.

Read more: Average Sex Time - How Long Should Sex Last? - Esquire

Okay, 20/f

My vagina stays wet ALL the time! There is no itching or burning or discomfort. There is a little odor, but not fishy. I don't know how to explain the odor. I've tried everything to get it to go away and it will for a brief period of time and then it'll come back. The odor started when I stopped wearing underwear. Then I read that, that could cause your PH balance to be messed up, so I quit. The gyno said there wasn't any type of infection.

How can I get rid of the odor? (I bathe normally) and why does my vagina always stay wet?

I would suggest you're normal. The wetness is most like simply your hormones. Are you on birth control pills? If so this could be the cause of the hormonal reaction of the pills. Something you should discuss with you GYN.

Since you bathe normally the odor or more properly the scent you are talking about is normal as well. The scent or your scent is the animalistic part of us that attract the opposite sex to us. It is supposed to be a subtle scent that in your case a male will find pleasing and attract him to you. It should be just strong enough for him to pick up on when he is close to you.

It not be something you can smell yourself while working. Meaning it remains on your panties or your fingers that you can bring to your nose to smell. If you can smell yourself while sitting or standing then you should discuss this with your GYN.

Here again it could be simply overactive hormones caused by birth control pill or other medications you may be taking. I am not a doctor and even if I was I do not have enough of your medical history or medical physiology to make any type of a diagnoses. Which is why you question really needs to be discussed with your GYN.

There is no reason to be embarrassed to discuss these thing with your GYN. Your GYN has heard these things before and as a medical professional he or she or the best person to answer your questions once a medical exam rules out medical causes for your problem.

In short my advice is to see your GYN and until then you might want to use a panty liner to protect your panties. Be they cotton granny or more risqué panties. I would suggest staying away from thongs.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. lately I've been feeling like he's holding me back.

I've always wanted to travel and do things with my life. I never wanted to be the settle down get married and have kids type. Right now I work 50 hours a week, I'm barely scraping by. I'm 21 and I haven't done anything with my life at all.

My boyfriend has just graduated college. He lives with me and doesn't have a job, and I'm supporting him, paying all the rent and bills and food and all that. So I can't afford to go out with friends and stuff. Which, for him is totally ok, becuase he's the type that likes to stay in and watch movies.

I just feel that if I stay with him, I'm stuck with this boring life forever. But I do love him for his humor, his personality, his intelligence, the sex is great, and many other things. He is a really great guy. I'm afraid that I've been with him for so long that I've gotten comfortable and wouldn't know how to be with anyone else.

I'm just so lost right now and I don't think this little explanation does it justice. I don't know what to do. Any and ALL feedback would be great.

Thanks

I like lightoftruths answer. In fact I do not think other than phrasing it differently I could not say it any better.

Two things make a great relationship and one of them is not sex. Sex is a side benefit of a great relationship. A great relationship as its base or foundation, if you will has, compatibility and communication as its base.

Part of compatibility would include good sex but it also includes some of the other things you mentioned you would like to do with life. If your life mate is not on the same page with you in these areas all of the other benefits of the relationship you mention will one by one sour. Which may already be happening since you have chosen to write to us for advice.

Communication is probably the most important part of a relationship. It does not mean you must constantly talk to one another. What it means is when you need to talk, need to communicate a feeling, a desire or a need you can do so openly without reservation or fear.

The sex is great, he makes you laugh but can you really talk to him. I have to think you cannot or you would not be writing to us for advice. In other situations a line I like to use in my advice to them is; "sex will only take a relationship so far; one day you wake up and find you need to talk to each other and find you have nothing in common." Is this where you find yourself now?

It would not be right for any of us to tell you to stay with him or to leave him. What I will tell you is I believe you need to sit down and reexamine your relationship with him. To stay with someone because you have become comfortable or the relationship feels like a comfortable pair of slippers. To my mind is not right; at some point those slippers will start to become uncomfortable and you will want to replace them. What do you do then, especially if those slippers have spawned little slippers.

My advice is you need to sit down think about what you really want and need from a relationship. Then sit down and talk to your boyfriend and see if he is willing to work at this relationship at least to a compromise point that is good for both of you. He can't fix something he may not know is broken unless you tell him. He deserves at least that much before you make any decision to leave the relationship.

20,f. My mom has gotten ill. I'm not sure for how long.
At first her doctors were saying it was Multiple Sclerosis but now they are saying it is Lupus

I've done a little research on the disease, and it looks like there's a lot more treatment for people living with Lupus.

My mom and I talk at least once a week but I only see her every other week. I am in college and live in the same town as my mother. We have never been super close, but since she has gotten sick I want to do everything I can to help her. I am really afraid for her right now and she doesn't know what to expect.

What can I do to be the most supportive of my mom?
What can I expect from her with her disease?

The Lupus Foundation of America is the place to turn to for answers and support. I have placed the URL for their homepage below.

I know a woman who has lived with Lupus for over 35 years. She was diagnosed with Lupus shortly after the birth of her second child. Lupus is a disease you can live a long time with provide you stay out of the sun and take the appropriate measures to change your lifestyle to avoid those things that bring on attacks.

As her daughter your role is to be supportive but not to make her an invalid. It might also help you and maybe your mom to attend support groups for Lupus other than just group chapter for Lupus Foundation of America. I found an organization called; Cure4Lupus.org which also offers support meetings throughout the country. In these meetings you will meet other Lupus sufferers as well as care givers and can have an open exchange of information on how the cope and care for their loved ones. The URL for them is:http://cure4lupus.org/store/index.php?main_page=page&id=21&chapter=6

Educating yourself and your mom on this disease is the best way to combat the effects. In this instance knowledge IS POWER. The more you know the better capable you are to work to make a better life for mom. These support groups and others like them are there to help.

Lupus was once something that was hidden and in effect put in a closet because it was misunderstood. In the 35 years since my friend was diagnosed they have come a long way in understanding this disease and treating it. There is still no cure though life is better today for those affected with Lupus. As the doctors learn more about it a cure will be found. Until then your role is to be a supportive one. To be there when mom has bad day and to help her make the changes she needs to make to have more good days than bad ones.

http://www.lupus.org/

I've been diagnosed with that, what is it?

"miscellaneous psychoses" which cannot yet find better diagnostic homes elsewhere can be recognized. The NOS category (Not Otherwise Specified), is often used to describe patient's psychotic states early on in the diagnostic process, when it is not clear how best to classify symptoms. As patients' conditions become better understood (with the passage of time, diagnostic testing, and history gathering) the NOS classification is often removed and a more precise diagnosis is made.

I'm not a doctor and the above information comes from the website Mentalhealth.net. With this type of diagnoses your doctor is either unable to diagnose a specific disorder or your symptoms may be pointing to one or my diagnoses. With further evaluation and examination the doctor will be able to make a better diagnoses. For now though the doctor is suggesting that you are in actuality suffering from some form of mental illness or injury.

I had sex 3days ago.. and I not sure dose pre-cum will make me pregnant

Yes it is possible to get pregnant from precum. It is still possible for you to take the plan B pill to prevent pregnancy. It is not quite as effective as if you took it with in 48 hours after sex but it is still effective and may prevent a possible pregnancy. It is possible to take the plan B pill up to a week after sex and have it prevent a pregnancy. The chances lesson its effectiveness with each day you wait.

I was at a pool party last week! It was cold so we all got in a group hug in the pool. I was in the middle of the hug and the boys were behind me (hugging).. It was a tight hug and now I'm scared I could be pregnant! Is it possible

You need to learn more about the biology of impregnation. In order to get pregnant a male has to ejaculate inside you or extremely close to your vagina so that his sperm can swim up and penetrate an egg, if you are fertile at the time.

The chlorine in the pool would not have been very hospitable to the sperm had a boy ejaculated thus killing them before they could swim to you. They would then have to penetrate his swimsuit them swim to you and penetrate your swimsuit and find the entrance to your vagina to swim up to a fallopian tube and find an egg.

It is highly improbable that all of this could have taken place. It is also highly improbable that any of the boys ejaculated in the pool. The water being below body temperature will normally prevent such things from happening.

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