about



I am straight to the point, My advice is given based on my opinions of what YOU write. I may not always tell you what you want to hear but I am not here to sugar coat shit.

I am honest, I am blunt, At times an asshole but one thing I can promise, I'll never lie.













advice

Hello I am a 20 year old physically fit woman. I'm very interested in becoming a police officer but I have absolutely no idea how to begin. I'm turning 21 at the end of this month and after this summer is over I would like to begin training to get a job as an officer. How do I start to go about this in the state of Pennsylvania? My brother said there's an officer school but I don't know how to contact them. I don't want to go through a normal college I want to go to a school specifically for police training. Any info you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!




Becoming a police officer of any of the authority will require a college degree in law enforcement.

If you want to seek a career as a police officer, I suggest looking into some college classes that train in that field.

You could also try stopping by your local police station and asking these sort of questions, Sometimes they will send their students out on training. It depends on the area and the field you are looking at.

[view]


Ok so first of all I'm not suicidal. I'm only 13 but my best friends mom killed herself a few days ago. Everyone said she took lots of pills and died. She was a nice lady and this might sound weird but I wanna know how she felt after she decided to take the pills. I mean like did she get sick first, did she just go to sleep, was she in pain, did she know she was dying? I kno this sounds bad but I've never knew anyone who killed themselves. I wanna kno how she was feeling. Do people feel bad while their overdosing on pills?



Different medications cause different symptoms for everyone.

We cannot tell you how she felt but from an experience I can tell you what I went through when I accidentally mixed a few pills...

From what I was told...

I started acting a little irrationality, I was laughing hysterically for a few minutes before I was still on the bed, I went into a seizure. My stepfather came in and yelled my name a few times and I did not snap out of it until he slapped me across the face. I got up and could barley stand on my own, with help I was led down the stairs. I was going in and out of consciousness. All I remember was drinking constant glasses of water to flush the medication out of my system. Luckily, There was a nurse who lived next door..She came over and took my blood pressure and it was dangerously low. My memory is very foggy from that night, I barely remember anything. I do remember my heart beating irregularly.

Now like I said, Everyone experiences different symptoms but I can tell you mine certainly wasn't pleasant at all.

[view]


Well first off I am a 30 year old Pastor. I have a lovely wife and 6 children with another on the way. Last night I had a few drinks and ended up having intercourse with another man. The worst part is I enjoyed it. I know Im going to hell for doing that with him. But do you think Im gay?



The only way to really answer this question is to ask yourself...

Do you find men attractive? Can you see yourself with a man? Do you prefer men over women?

There is nothing wrong with being gay, Life should be about living it too it's fullest.

If you enjoyed having sex with a man, That's fine.

If you enjoy both men and women you could just be bisexual and there is nothing wrong with that one either.

[view]


Im a married man with children. For a living I am a personal trainer. Lately, I have been finding it harder and harder to keep my urges hidden. During work when I see a big buff man I get an erection instantly. So yes I am not doubting the fact that Im gay. But how can I tell my wife and kids? Im 28 years old by the way.



It is never easy to come out of the closet, The best way to tell them is either to have a sit down with your wife or write her a long letter and put it somewhere you know she'll read it. Reality is, You deserve to be happy. If you want to be with men you are entitled to do so.

Your wife will not take this news lightly and that is just something you will have to except, It is not your fault, You shouldn't feel guilty it is just the way it sometimes goes. My best advise, Try having a sit down in my personal opinion I think your wife deserves the respect to be told in person. However, Whatever is easier for you. If you keep your sexuality hidden you may find yourself living in misery because you are living a life where you are unhappy.

[view]


HI
Well my friend Is lieing alot to me and asking me for money and say you pay me back never has. She always says that shes going to get some thing like before she said she's getting an ipad and iPhone when she isnt. Im really sick of it. And before she asked me for money so far i have given her about $20;00 or more in the last month and says she'll pay me back but never has. In class she always copies me with worksheets, projects and even the way i dress and do my hair! She copied me in a project and said that she did it first when i did and i had to do it all over again. And she gets all the attention when she copies me me im so sick of it. I know these are really not big problems but im really sick of it! I need help for her not to do it no more. :)



Confront her,



Let her know that you are tired of giving her money, Let her know that you will not lend her anymore. You don't have to be bitchy about it just tell her no the next time she ask. If she begs, Keep telling her no and that you don't have any money.

Tell her what you told us, You are sick of it

If she gets all bitchy about it then it is her problem, Let her know that you feel she is using you.

[view]


I am a seveteen year old teenage girl who has been with this guy for about two years. things have been great at first but now..well not so well. we love each other and i know that but we get into arguments every other day. it hurts me emotionally and i try to fix things. but each time i try it just fails. i love this kid but just some things he says can be very hurtful. how can i fix this??? and i tried talking to him how it hurt me also



The only way to fix it is to talk it out together, If he isn't willing to sit down and work it out then you will never get anywhere. Communication is the biggest thing in relationships and if you don't have that then your relationship is doomed to fail. If your boyfriend isn't willing to listen and talk things out then your boyfriend doesn't want to put in enough effort to be in a relationship and it may be time to let him go. You can't force someone to listen and you can't force someone to talk.

[view]


I'm dating this guy. I don't know him very well but because of past experiences, I have decided not to date a friend, someone I'm particularly close to. I need a new experience! He just graduated from my school, and I am a junior now since school just ended. He is very sweet and talkative and I really enjoy talking to him. We haven't met in person but he and I are planning to go to Perdido on Saturday. He has a car and such. We've only been dating for a day or so but I feel so weird. I feel like I'm not getting anywhere in the relationship. I feel like I'm not getting to know him. Is it normal to feel this way when actually dating someone you really don't know about? I'm sure I'll get to know him as the relationship goes on, but still. Any advice?


The first 6 months of a relationship is basically a trial period, You are just getting to know your partner.

You have only been dating a day, That is nowhere long enough. You can't expect to fully know your partner in a week/month or even 3 months. Yes, It is normal. Relationships take work, If you want to get to know your boyfriend then the both of you are going to have to work at it. There must of been something that led the both of you to where you are now. I suggest taking the relationship slow until you know him and you know you can trust him which very well again could be 6 months. You can't rush it, It doesn't work that way. Have some patience

[view]


Ok...So last friday there was this pool party at my friend esmereldas house...&& i noticed my boyfriend Julio, && my best friend go into the bathroom together...I heard screaming && moaning...so i slammed the door open...Then i seen them havin sex...&& i started cryin' But then my bf said "Hey bbi yu wanna join" I said "Fuck yu"...&& Ran off...My bestie told me she waz sryy...But i still hate her..&& Julio.!!>:(( Wht do i do.?!! Please please help me.! :'(



Get rid of the both of them


They betrayed you, Disrespected you, Lied too you,


Friends don't betray friends, No matter how sorry she is it was 100% WRONG of her. Your boyfriend Julio is a dirt bag who doesn't deserve you and never did.

This isn't your fault but my best advise is too stay clear of these assholes. There are people out there who will treat you like gold and if he cheated on you with her, I can almost promise you he will cheat on her with someone else. This guy is a loser, Your friend is a loser.

I agree with Ninja, If you been having sexual contact I highly suggest getting checked out.

Cut contact with the both of them, They don't deserve your friendship. Screw them

[view]


my gf wants to suck my penis &want to drink sperms will she get pregnant



No, You cannot get pregnant from drinking sperm


[view]


if you get a girl on your lap and you get a boner and it goes up her butt considered sex



No

[view]


Ok well this is the story. I was with my previous boyfriend(lets say is name is lenny)for 4 years until I went off to college and we ended up breaking up 3 months(october/november) into the school year. Things weren't officially over until january. At the beginning of the school year i met a new guy friend(casey) and we meshed well. once me and lenny were officially over, one night i cried to casey about lenny and i came to find out that casey was going through the exact same thing as me. he was trying to let go of an ex and we found comfort in each other (sounds like a rebound i know, but honestly once meant to be that way). a month into us becoming closer we ended up dating. things were amazing! after about a month things started getting rocky. we were on and off and he was the one always ending it(he confessed he was scared i would hurt him). He was constanly going back home to dallas during this time. we finally took a good break and ended up getting back together once the summer started. we were having a long distance relationship as he was from dallas and i stayed in austin for the summer instead of going back to houston. casey told me he had never loved someone so quick and wanted to get married after college. one weekend things got really bad between us and he ended it( as always using the excuse of him feeling i would hurt him because i had so many guy friends). i ended up asking him if he still loved his ex girlfriend(i always felt she was the reason why he left), he said yes and i confessed I was also still in love with lenny(at the time i felt i still did). I told him "maybe we're better off being back with our exs" he just said "we do" I insisted in him trying to get her back since i thought i wanted luis. I could tell casey was sketchy about going back to her but since he saw i was still in love with lenny he would return to her. He called her that day and met up and got back together. I also tried doing the same with lenny but i had hurt him to much and he said it wouldnt be a good idea. I had decided that i would drive to houston and get lenny back(i knew if i talked to him in person i would). after really thinking i decided i didnt want lenny because he wasnt going any where in life. he was just stuck in our little community and i needed to better myself. throughout this process of me trying to get lenny back, casey was there for me. I ended up realizing that casey was the one i really loved but it was too late to get him back since he was back with his ex. (casey is the type of guy that once ends the relationship he will no longer talk to the girl. he doesnt cheat and always does the right thing) because of this i was scared he would kick me out of his life completely, but i understood. it ended up being that casey still wanted to text me and have me in his life. one night i confessed that i felt i was the "other girl" and i put an end to it and stopped all contact with him. a few days later, he contacts me and is upset on how i can forget about him so easily. I was only trying to do the right thing no matter how much i loved him. He's tore in between us two. he's in love with her and is in love with me too. he can no longer leave his girlfriend because he went back into her life and cant just leave again because it would be wrong. I'm afraid when school starts again and he comes back to austin, that he's going to come looking for me again and i wont know if its just because its convienant to him or because he'll realise that he really wants me. what do i do? i'm trying to be a women about this because i dont want to hurt anyone. (it might sound as if casey is a douche bag, immature and doesnt know what he wants as of now but he's a great guy. he taught me that i want an educated man in my life that has goals. I wish he would realise that about his girlfriend(she's not educated and it bothers him)) should i move on or really fight for him? or has the girlfriend already won the battle? i'm sorry its so long but i need some counseling from y'all.



You and Casey both weren't ready for another relationship, You jumped the gun and you both rushed things. Relationships take time to get over and it doesn't always just "magically" go away when someone else comes along. You and Casey both leaned on one another but you know what else? You were a rebound, He was a rebound.

Lenny went back to his ex, After dating someone for 4 years I would start thinking that maybe Lenny never truly got over his ex all that time.

The number one thing I always tell everyone; You can never truly move on if you are still hung up on someone else. It is not fair to the person you are dating because the truth is..You can't truly love someone is you aren't over the other. This isn't about winning a battle, It's not a competition. Frankly, I would shit can Lenny. It is a pretty good slap in the face when someone goes crawling back to an ex.

My best advise, Move on completely and stay away from the drama. If you want a committed relationship then you need to find someone who wants to be in one. Casey isn't over his ex and him giving you the reason "I'm afraid you will hurt me" is his way of telling you he isn't ready. Lenny on the other hand, Hell if he wants to date an ex let him but don't go crawling back to him because you will just be putting yourself right back into her shoes.

Clean Slate; Meet someone new who is over their exes and wants a real relationship. Stay away from the ones that are fresh out of a break up, You won't find commitment that way.

[view]


Me and my boyfriend of 6 years have not had our first kiss. The we have dun is hug and hold hands. I really do love him and want to kiss. What should I do.



Wow 6 years and no kiss?!


Just go for it! After all this time you two should be comfortable enough with one another. Lean in and kiss him. ;)

[view]


I am a 18 year old female that is 5'4 and all my life i struggled with my weight, before the depo i weighed 200 pounds and i finally got enough self motivation going to lose weight and i lost about 8 pounds in a month so i weighed 192. Then i stopped weighing myself, i got on the depo about two and a half months ago it was my first shot and my next shot is june 28th which will be my second shot. i used to eat fast food everyday (when i weighed 200) and eat chocolate and ice cream every day, yes literally and when i got on a diet and lost eight pounds i went down to eating fast food once a day, 3 days a week and no ice cream or chocolate. I decided to get a more strict diet since i was going to get depo shot because i heard any type of birth control will cause weight gain. So i cut fast food out of my diet completely and cut sodas off and only ate fast food when i absolutely had to , and this diet has been going on for two and a half months.Today i went to the doctor and i weigh a HORRIBLE 208 pounds my highest weight EVER, i was baffled because ive been in such a strict diet, i am furious all my hard work caused me to gain weight!!! I assume it was the depo, now im considered going off it but my friends tell me the pills are the same and my bmi is to high for implanon, and i dont trust the vaginal rings because my sister had my niece and nephew being on the vaginal ring and two of my cousins got pregnant on it. So my question is if i continue to be on this will i continue to gain weight?! Will i lose the weight if i get off it? Is this weight permanent or temporary i really am already obese and am trying hard to lose weight, and this is re



Most birth control is known to put on weight, This is where you should ask your doctor questions first.

I was on the Depo Provera shot for 2 years Shockingly, I've gained 30 pounds. In my experience Depo Provera was the worst birth control I've ever been on.


If you are looking for birth control where it is less of a hassle them popping pills everyday, Try the Mirena IUD as it worked wonderfully for me. It needs to be changed once every 5 years and there is no hassle to it.

Thankfully, I've fully shed off the 30 lbs but again anything your doctor prescribes it is always good to ask these sort of things first. Also, Even when on birth control make sure you use condoms if you don't want a baby. Better to be safe then sorry

[view]


okay im 24 with 4 kids and i have a boyfriend who treats me like crap. he doesnt help me with the kids he stays out all night and im up crying waiting for him to come home the most hes been gone for is 7 days he didnt call or check up.to make things worse is were currently staying in a 1 bedroom motel suite.He come and goes calls me names and stresses me out.He spends my money all the time he even spent my cristmas money i had saved up for my kids.im tired i want better for me and my kids he rather be at the casino then to be with us.I want to leave him so baddd but i cant cus i have no where to go.I have family but there not there for me im a good mother and want to be happy,i deserve it. he didnt even tell me happy mothers day nothing.he has no respect for me at all.im always with my kids an he running the streets.Help



I can't say I completely disagree with Matt...


The boyfriend NEEDS to go, You are a young mother with four children you do not need five.

Assuming you are employed by the statement you made about staying in a motel. I highly recommend seeking section 8 housing somewhere in your area or applying for low income housing. It is a terrible situation for you and your children to be sitting in a 1 bedroom motel. If you need help, Seek help. There are many places that offer assistance but I'm going to honestly say this, Do not 100% depend on welfare to raise your children. You bought them into this world, You need to take some responsibility. If you want too be a good mother and role model then YOU are going to be the one to make that happen. It is not a good mother to bring children into this world if you could not afford them nor take proper care of them.


[view]


What is wrong with facebook? Why does it keep saying that my email is not valid anymore? I verified my email so much time on facebook but then the same message keeps showing up. Does anyone know how to fix this problem? I can't even receive email from the email address I use for my facebook account.



It sounds like someone may of hacked your email address, Try going into "Forgot password section" in your email. If you have a security question set up you can retrieve your email address.


Same thing with Facebook, Go to the "Forgot Password" If you can't find your email with your account after trying to answer security question then you may be out of luck. :(

[view]


this girl is ALWAYS staring me down. shes a wannabe bad ***. she stares me down, gives me cold looks,and shes always talking about me , I hear her all of the time, shes not a good whisperer. She talks about me to her friends and they don't even talk about me or have a problem with me. I am not a mean person at all, I don't fight and argue with people and I have no idea why this girl doesn't like me. She gets mad when her friends come over and talk to me. It really gets on my nerves cuz I take 3 classes with her and shes always staring me down and giving me mean looks. I have never done anything to her and I overhear her all of the time talking about me to somebody, I hear her every time. She gets pissed when her friends talk to me and I overheard her telling them she doesn't like when they talk to me. I cant stand it when I walk into class and shes staring me down and giving me mean looks, its annoying and shes been doing it all school year. im not good at confronting people, I don't like arguing and fighting. I Have never been a b**ch to anyone lol. please help. what should i say/do?




Ignore her,

Believe it or not, Someone who constantly talks badly about someone has insecurity issues, Jealousy issues etc. Sometimes you don't have to do anything at all it could simply be because there is something about YOU she is jealous about.


Karma is a real bitch believe me when I tell you, What goes around always comes around somewhere in the long run. If you don't show any reaction then she will get no reaction. You said it yourself, She is not a very good whisper. What does that tell you?.....It tells you she wants you to hear her because she is trying to piss you off. Shrug if off, Not everyone is going to want to hear her mouth and eventually she may find herself loosing her friends because of the fact that she has nothing good to say. People get bored of drama after awhile and this girl sounds like a real jail breaker with her mouth. Continue to be yourself and be happy. Don't be a bitch, Don't stare her down just ignore her. The truth is (It drives people INSANE to see someone they don't like happy) It is apart of jealousy. If you show no reaction to her then eventually she will realize she isn't getting what she wants out of you and she'll eventually stop.

[view]


Why is the culture in southern california so diseased. I've been to plenty of states and countries, and its only socal where i see sluts who disrespect their parents, vomit in their cars their parents bought them, only think about sex, and even at such a young age! Why is this? Why are girls so indecent here.



Lindsay Lohan is a bad influence

[view]


I've known this girl for almost a year and she's such an important part of my life, she's my best friend, my lover, the girl I've always wanted. We became close very quickly over the summer and started to take it a step further once school started. Things were kinda rocky because she had a boyfriend who was a total ass but it took her awhile to break up with. She did eventually break up with him and so we officially started talking about a relationship. At that time I was 17 almost 18 and she was 15 almost 16. The only main concern was her parents accepting our relationship because I'm black and she's white so her parents told us to take it easy for awhile. Well things were really good until all of a sudden one day she tells me she likes being single more and doesn't feel like she's ready for a relationship. Usually I'm understanding but I've had this happen to me numerous times and this time was it so I got pissed and we got into a fight. Things sort of cooled down and we made up. About a week later she tells me to come to a bball game to hang with her so I go. I get there, we hug, talk, etc and then this guy comes and sits in front of her and lays back into her lap. At this point I'm hurting but trying to hide, everyone including her could see it. She asks if I'm mad and I just say I'm upset, we hug and talk for a bit and then I leave. She texts me and tells me she still likes me and I can't really remember the rest. So again things cool down, everything is normal and then she tells me she's going to a party with drinking at smoking. Once again I'm pissed because I'm straight edge and she herself said all that stuff was stupid. The day after that we get into a fight a huge fight and pretty much say we're done with each other. 2 days later she texts me saying she needs me more than anything she's ever needed before. The same goes for me because. I can't live without this girl. We have a moment, make up, but things didn't really get better. The more she partied, the less I saw her, the more we fought. She had pretty much changed from who she was and I told her that numerous times. I then find out she's talking to some other guy and he's pretty much the opposite of me, pothead, got in a wreck recently, etc... Then two weeks later the guy breaks it off with her and she's crushed. I tell I'm sorry but also tell her that she pretty much did the same to me and I've been hurting everyday since then. She tells me she loves and can't live without me. Let me add this, before she started acting out whatever she said to me like making promises, saying she can't live without me, she backed all that stuff up but as she started changing she stopped proving herself to me. So after that thing are ok, not great or better just ok. Whenever she'd tell me about a guy she'd say they're just friends I guess so I won't freak or maybe because she still has feelings. She still has flashes of her old self(who she really is), she recently said she's never smoking again because she had an epiphany but says she likes drinking too much to stop. She is the only person that has figured me out and I know she cares about me dearly but her current lifestyle has clouded all that. I told everything what she used to be and she said she wants to be that person again so bad and so do I. I know she still has feelings for me, she's coming to my graduation, she shows she still has the things I've given her. We don't talk as much as we used to which was all day everyday. I honestly, sincerely, cannot see myself with anyone else, even though I'm going to college I still want her around and she hates I'm going to college I just know, no matter how much she says she only wants to be friends, I just know she still has feelings for me and I won't give up until she finally realizes it. So what is your take on this? Is this a phase that she will grow out of and come running back to me?

Two things: This girl is young, This girl doesn't know what she wants.


To be honest, You are rushing her into being in a relationship she isn't ready for. When people break up with someone it takes time to get over it no matter how poorly they were treated. I was in an abusive relationship for 5 years, It took me well over 6 months before I was ready to date again. Everyone is different, Some people move on faster than others but you can't rush it. This girl is 16 years old and likely does not know what she wants out of her life. This doesn't mean she doesn't have feelings for you but from what you've said above she is confused and needs time. If she likes you as much as she says she does then why not just support her and let her come to you when she is ready as at this time it doesn't sound like she is ready for commitment and again she is young.

[view]


For some reason lately, when i download new songs and then sync my ipod to my itunes, it keeps saying that some of the songs cant be played on the ipod. I use a utube coverter and have been for a very long time. I dont know why this is happening. I just restored the ipod and it still says they cant not be played. Is this happening to anyone else? Does anyone know how to fix this? btw, this has never happend before. Thank you for your time in advance :)



Sounds like an error message, Ipods need to be updated once in awhile. It is just like Itunes if you don't update it the songs won't play. Try updating your ipod and see what happens ;)

[view]


Me and my boyfriend have been together for 1 year and 8 months, im not sure whether or not i should call him my boyfriend anymore though, were having a really rough patch, and things dont seem to be working out anymore.. i love him so much,the only problem i have with him is if he goes to his friends house where there are alot of girls there, and they dance and act like complete sluts, this is the ONLY place i asked my boyfriend not to go, and yet he complains saying i dont give him "freedom" he has always been so controlling, not to lie so have i, but NEVER as controlling as him, hes such a sweet guy, but hes kind of an asshole to be honest, and now that his friend came back from another country, he broke his promise of not going to his house because he KNEW it made me feel very uncomfortable, and i always promised him and kept it, whenever he had a problem with me doing something id do it, and now that he broke his promise he says he doesnt want to be with me anymore? =/, hes been so mean to me.. and saying that hew ants to move on with his life.. can anyone tell me whats going on? we were soo good before his friend came.. please no one write me saying its about another "girl" or whatever, my brother and him are best friends.. and my brothers 20 and my brother knows whats going on and he told me that he doesnt even talk to any girls, its not even about girls, he keeps talking about how he wants his freedom, and then my brother tells him he can work things out with me, and he says he actaully wants to, then the next day he says he doesnt want a relationship anymore.. he threw me away like im totally nothing.. and we were SO close, talking every single day.. he was like a dad, a brother, a boyfriend, a best friend.. and i was the same way with him, PLEASE someone telll me whats going on.. because im rlly heartbroken =/

Your boyfriend doesn't have insecurity issues, Your boyfriend wants to play the field and isn't being upfront about it. Instead of being honest, He is beating around the bush and doing things the easy way.


Basically, Your boyfriend no longer wants to be in a relationship. This is not your fault, If he is an asshole then obviously he doesn't deserve to be with you. Sometimes it takes people a while before they show their true colors but it's his loss. If you want commitment you are better off finding someone who will respect you for who you are. This asshole isn't committed and him going to a house when he knows there will be girls flirting with him is a red flag and a warning.


I promise you one thing; If he treated you like shit, He will treat the next one just the same. People don't just magically change. You need to realize you are better off and don't need the drama, If your boyfriend wants to be an asshole then let him. I would take some time off for awhile and let yourself heal, Trust me when I say this one the only person with regrets will be him in the long run but in the meantime cut contact and don't talk too him. If he didn't deserve you in a relationship he certainly doesn't deserve you as a friend either.

[view]



<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
humorist-workshop

eXTReMe Tracker