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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!
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I think my neighbor has a crush on me, but I like his friend... What are some ways I can let him know I don't like him without just saying that?
A crush means someone is not trying to spend time with or ask out the object of their affection. As long as he isn't asking you out, you don't need to say anything. If he does, simply tell him you don't feel any chemistry with him. The word chemistry goes over lots better than I don't like you. At least it has in the many times I've turned down guys.
Long story short, about 6 months ago my parents kicked me out because they didn't want to "enable my depression." I stayed with my real dad for a couple months, but was having panic attacks because he's... a piece of work. So my boyfriend of 2 years said it was okay to move in with him at his parents' house. With nowhere else to go (I was unemployed, my summer job ended) I moved in. It's been stressful, but I'm staying here only having to chip in for a bill or two while my boyfriend and I save up.
Problem is, they have the most annoying dogs. They're small, and bark nonstop. Not kidding. They get spoiled by the mom. She doesn't care when they climb all over her when she has a plate of food. They get a "oh hush," when they go into a barking frenzy. If I accidentally move something in my room and make a noise, they start barking. If they're in the backyard, they're barking. My boyfriend's black friend came over the other day and the dog came up and was savagely growling and about to lunge. He only backed off because I herded him away and he scurried off. No one else would do anything. I'm amazed at how misbehaved these dogs are. I can't leave the bedroom door open or they'll come in and piss on everything. And they've only gotten worse. The only discipline they ever get is from me, because I don't think it's cute when a dog climbs on me at the table for food. They know to stay away from me, but the house is so loud that when they bark I swear it's 3x louder. I get over stimulated now, to where I start having a panic attack because there's so much noise (they also babysit a spoiled toddler that screams every 30 secs.)
My boyfriend and I want to get married soon, but we want to be in a good place financially before then, so we can have our own place when we do. To do that, we need to get good jobs and keep saving at his parents', but at this point it's starting to affect my wellbeing, staying here. Work is extremely stressful, as is home. My patience is worn thin, and irritability fuels my anxiety. What can I do? I'm at my limit. I don't think I can stay with anyone, I'd have to get an apartment, but my bf doesn't want to leave his parents' house (we're 21 so it's not that crazy). Ugh. What can I do? I'm trying to lose weight and get ahold of my depression and was doing well but I can only take so much. Any tips/advice would be MUCH appreciated.
YOU can't change the facts of whats going on at his parents house. I know the alternative choices dont seem to be there but no one is holding you captive to staying there. So you and boyfriend need to put your heads together and try to figure out any alternative to a place to stay and of course, getting jobs now is of critical importance to change your situation. Even without depression, any normal person would get stressed and go nuts in a place that is chaos 24/7. I have a relative like that so I know how this may be stressing you. If you have any income and might be able to pay for renting a room in someones house for real cheap, then I'd try that. Of course I am talking about any and all people you know which means putting aside any pride and just telling everyone who does know you of your situation and see who is able to help put you up. I did this when I decided to leave my ex who was abusive. I told any coworkers I could think of even those I didn't know as well, told the pastor, any other relatives, even those who are distant, any friends, even ask your friend's parents who know you. Living in an unfinished basement or spare room for a while has got to be better. Its also incentive to work harder at saving up to get into your own place. I've lived in my van for quite some time and had discovered how much I can really do without when it comes to money inflow even minimum wage, vs what I spend outgoing. If you want your own place bad enough, you will go through the uncomfortable and hard hoops to get there. Thats what I've had to do and it is more possible than you might think and it isn't stressful compared to the only alternatives left to me. I hope you come across someone willing to help you out.
There's a guy I go to school with who used to have a crush on me and flirted with me when we passed each other in the hallway. I just found out that he raped a girl named Ashley who I'm acquainted with, but I was sworn to secrecy by my friend, Allison who told me, not to tell anyone (mainly to protect Ashley, the victim's reputation and safety). The rape has been reported and the department faculty members are aware of it. I am very close with a teacher on that faculty and would like to discuss it with her. Do you think I'd be over-stepping my bounds? I did promise Allison (my friend who told me) that I wouldn't tell anyone about it but this teacher already knows about it anyway. Are there any bases I'm not covering that I need to be aware of before I discuss this with my teacher?
Allison went out of bounds by sharing with you. Anyone you talk to, trying to pretend that you know nothing and are just curious and want to talk about a subject matter that is secret will automatically know that you found out somewhere. ANy info on the rape should remain between Ashley, the staff at school and any police on the case...thats it...no one else, even if you used to know him in school. For you to even try to talk to someone is a violation of her privacy. Try to be a good example for Allison who already made a mistake in telling you. Perhaps you are jealous the Ashley didn't tell you herself and you had to find out from Allison. It doesnt matter if shes your friend. If she chose not to tell you, then you Must go on as if you don't know anything about it and that includes talking to anyone else on the subject. YOu'll need to deal with your own thoughts, whatever distortion is leading you to feel its so important to talk to staff. So like Razhie, I also wonder why you feel so on fire to talk to someone, to what purpose? It wont make the fact that a rape occured go away. Perhaps reality TV has just got lots of people thinking they are entitled to know every little detail of how some action went down.
PUt yourself in her shoes, wold you like it if another student wanted to talk about your being raped, wanting all the juicy details? It would be unprofessional of anyone who is part of the group in the know to protect her from further attack and those seeking to get justice for her against her attacker, to discuss it with whomever wants to talk about it, and leaking details.
Unless you want to chance the embarrassment of having faculty telling you its none of your business and looking at you askance as if you have strange issues yourself mentally, then I would refrain from doing so. Everyone is going to wonder why you have this strong a feeling of needing to discuss it and that will bring negative attention on you.
My parents think theres something wrong with me and dont trust me to do anything they treat me like a 4 year old.I only live with my mom and stap dad.I dont like my real dad but t be honest i want to live with him at this point how do i tell that to my mom?ps sorry for the errors im really stresssed rn
You didn't go into detail as to what they say is wrong with you. You also dont give examples of when they don't trust you so its hard to tell whats going on....whether they are being reasonable or whether they need to loosen up a bit.
Going to live with Dad is not going to end your problems, you'll just gain another set of them.
Sometimes, we get difficult to live with relatives to learn how to deal with such people, to gain some skills in handling people in a mature way where ultimately everyone is happy and has the freedom to make choices of their own. I can see this in what I learned with my parents and what my kids learned with us. I know its not an answer you want to hear but I could probably tell better if you can shed more light on your situation.
One year ago my best male friend (of many years) told me his feelings were not exactly 'friendly', but I couldn't reciprocate. I also have a boyfriend whom I love and had been with for 3 years.
I never had romantic feelings for my friend, but I am very attached to him as I have always wanted a brother or sister and he filled this void, emotionally speaking, exactly like a brother. We'd see each other almost daily and have fun, and be there for each other. Things have gotten a bit rocky eversince he told me the truth and he had a hard time understanding that I didn't feel that way. To this day, he refuses to meet my boyfriend.
Finally, 6 months ago he got a girlfriend, as I have strongly encouraged him to look elsewhere for romantic fulfillment. The problem is, he did it in order to get over me and not because he's in love. On top of everything, he thought it a good idea to confess his feeling about me to her. At least she made an informed choice.
Background info:This is a woman he had cut contact with 10 years ago, when he met and fell in love with me (said she suddenly seemed unattractive to him). Their present relationship started with her cheating on her fiancee with my friend. She moved in with my friend (she's from a far away village), who promised free housing and all costs included.
He admits to not being in love with her, and feeling the same about me. He does say he cares about her though. He barely writes to me anymore, or to any of his friends. When he does write he is always stressed out and convinced he's a bad partner, but he is giving this person a place to live for free, rides everywhere, nights out (he's not outgoing) and emotionally he is doing the best he can for her, since he feels guilty for not 'feeling it' 100%. Also, he tells me how she complains constantly of being 'bored' and how all his money goes on entertaining her, and whenever he wants to do sth for himself he feels guilty.
We see each other very rarely, and when we do it is always with her (at first she pretended to be ok with us hanging out alone, but she constantly made ridiculous scenes over it, so it's not happening anymore). She pretends a great deal. She manipulates him to the point where even he believes that she is not at all bothered by me. Despite obvious evidence.
I wouldn't actively do anything to change the course of their lives. It hurts me and it hurts to see him like this though. 6 months on, he still complains about 'not being able to find a balance between his personal life and other aspects of his life'.
His absence is even tougher for me since I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and this is exactly when my best friend is barely even there. He knows about my diagnosis and that worries me even more. I feel like all I ever was to him was the possibility of sex, and when that proved not to be the case, I became a disposable element, nothing more. I invested actual feelings of affection in him and was always there for him when he needed me. It hurts a lot.
Is it that you are depressed because he is not in your life as before? You have a boyfriend. You have partnered up and he's not the partner though he wishes he was. Seeing you together with your boyfriend must be really hard on him. He has feelings just like you. YOur situation is one that c an't be resolved the way you are going.
A partnership of commitment and love whether married or not is based on two things, having the chemistry to be best of friends and the chemistry to feel romantic feelings for each other.
You both had the best friend thing. He also felt the romance part. You didn't.
Theres two ways to look at it when this happens. Either the guy is mistaken, thinking he feels love when it was only lust. But then such a guy wouldn't invest too much time being a best friend if all he wanted was sex dear. The boyfriend you say is a 3 yr thing but you didn't say how long this other guy was your best friend. Am I to assume that you've known each other much longer?
My take on this is that in your desire so badly to have a sibling and you thought you found one in him, that there is a chance that your mind just "friend zoned' him which subconsciously would have blocked any opportunities and chances for you to explore something beyond the best friends part of a committed couple. I suppose he hoped you would pick up on it, even after you got together with your boyfriend, hoping that at some point you'd see the truth, that you loved him too.
It was wishful thinking on his part and bad timing that he never told you sooner how he felt or even at the beginning when you met the other guy. I think its understandable, him not wanting to meet your boyfriend, because imagine how painful it would be for him to see you with the guy you chose, the man who gets to have you in his life the way he wished he could be. Wouldn't you feel the same if it were the other way around.
He may care about the other gal, maybe like a sister or cousin, but unless he's in love with her, ALL he's doing is using her to fill an empty spot in his life, the spot he wished you filled like a mate for him. So his will never be a good relationship if he stays.
You did not say if your 3 yr boyfriend is also a best friend for you? Is he only a romantic partner? If he is both, then you would not be missing the best friend part so badly that you would become depressed. My guess is that many marriages, you're in a situation where you have only one instead of both parts needed for a solid foundation to a relationship. Too many are in relationships with a lover sex is good, but they are not treated like a best friend, more like shit on the ground,while others have a best friend but there is no sex and they cheat and go outside a marriage for that. Neither is good. If you lack a boyfriend who is as great a best friend as the guy you're not with, then you are also settling for less. Getting the romance from bf but wanting to use your friend to just continue to fill the best friend part. While it is possible for people of opposite sex to be friends and neither have any romantic feelings for each other, if one does, then that messes it all up and it can never be the relationship either of you want because of you are wanting opposite things. So either you let him go and stop hanging with him to fulfil your best friend needs, or you may have to take a chance that may seem extreme. I don't know, just guessing at your current bf relationship. He may be a great guy and treat you well but if that best friend chemistry is missing for you with him, and it hasn't happened in 3 years, you just may be with the wrong guy. Romance and great sex is wonderful but it wont fulfill your other needs as you already know.
I am not saying the best friend is the answer. He may not be. But what I see hear, based only on what you say, is you didn't feel about him romantically, not whether you gave romance a chance to blossom. Not blaming you for anything dear. I've talked to many in the same situation, either the girl gets really jealous of any new girl her male best friend starts seeing or she becomes really depressed, not knowing why.
I have talked to enough girls who realized, that perhaps they had stuck the guy in the friend zone only because they didn't feel a big bang hot passionate desire and attraction for the guy when they first met. Yes, sometimes it means the chemistry is not there. But half the time its not so. If there is a feeling of passion at first meet, it could also be lust on both parts and yes females feel lust too, wanting so badly to bed a guy.
Others find a best friend first and because they don't feel that bang of lust at first sight, they assume there is no chance of falling in love with the person along the way. Some love starts as an ember and slowly grows to a blazing flame is you allow it and aren't afraid to give it a chance. The more time you spend with a person, you come to admire many things about them and can actually come to love them. Some girls have compartmentalized their feelings and have no idea that over time they also fell in love, not knowing cus it was subtle. But when there are strong feelings of loss, of jealousy or depression it may be, not a for sure sign, but may be that the girl loves the guy but just never saw him that way. Thats all I can think of dear. You can't be with one guy for the friendship and another for the romance. If there truly are no feelings for best friend, then perhaps both guys are not right for you and you need to seek one in whom you find both best friend and lover.
so I've started developing feelings for my step bro,our age gap is 6 years and he's in army now while I'm still a student. it all started on a plane flight last year. he sat with me and i was by the windows. i tried leaning against him but he pushed me away however in the middle of the flight, i woke up lying on his chest. moments later, he stood up and went to the washroom but before that he placed a pillow near my head, [ps he didn't actually knew that he woke me up]when he was back. i tried leaning against him again and my hair was all in my face and he gentlyplace it behind my ear.few hours later,i woke up & requested if i could lie on his lap and there was no objection from him and so i. i lied on and tried to shift to a better position however i applied a little too much pressure. soon, he told me to get up as he needs to use the bathroom again. when he was back his hand was blocking his crotch and sat down placing a pillow above it. i was curious but didnt ask much and laid down however it wasn't really comfortable thus i removed the cushion, it might be a little gross to say this but i could actually feel his penis standing upright.just to state that he have no girlfriends before despite living for 18 years.
we reached our destination and we sat beside each other throughout the whole journey, i would say. in one of the days, we were visiting a tourist attraction, i was cold and he offered me his winter jacket. next day, he fell sick. however like i mentioned he sat with me throughout the whole journey, he was so sick that he cuddled himself like a ball sitting beside the window, all of a sudden he just played on my lap and started sleeping. i took out my jacket and placed it over him, he tossed around and he was sooooooo adorable. soon when he recovered, he didn't really lie on my lap however for fun, its my turn... I'm a pretty photogenic person but he's not and he hardly takes pictures and never helps to take pictures even if his biological siblings requested him too however for this time without pleading,he agreed in a second and boast how photogenic he is haha .
however when we were back from our holidays, things get a little different over time, whenever the sisters are around he will not really respond to me however when they are away for something he would answer all my questions that i was curious about...
few weeks later... he's entering army and before he left i reminded him to get a red box from my room, in it , it contains 263 notes for him to read every weekend as he will not be able to bring it into camp. few months later, we are having a family gathering (having bbq) which was held 2 days ago, our cousins were all there and were chatting while eating when he suddenly asked if i want to compete skate boarding with him and of course i agreed. after eating we want up to their houses to chill and we were all discussing about the latest pop drama's main character song joong ki hahaha.. just to say that I've told my cousin's girlfriend who is the same age as him about our issues and she kept it a secret but tried to help, she told me to move in closer to him because there were no more seats and the area was very cramp, i looked into her eyes for a moment and my step bro waved his hand and told me to move in,my friend who was the same age was him showed him some ladies photos, he leaned in towards me with his cap touching my face. However he did not compliment any of them.. sooner or later all our cousins were in a room when we realised that we were the only ones outside the living room with our parents and a few adults. we then moved in and sat down, we were having body contacts and all.. if you are reading this, thanks for spending so much time, please share with me your opinion and it really matters a lot to me.
The age gap and fact he is a step brother doesnt factor in here. This is a simple girl likes boy and doesn't know if he likes her back. So are these signs he might be interested back?
As an outside person, not being there to see what was in his eyes, tone of his voice or to feel the vibes coming off him to see if things were otherwise, just the facts you mentioned, I would have to say sound all innocent and plausible as just him being nice as a brother and a gentleman. The fact his body reacted with a hard penis doesnt mean that he automatically desires you. My own brother reacted when he saw my sis and I modeling the new nightgowns Mom got us for Christmas, something about nipples showing through, which made us aware how easy a males body can react even without his heart and mind engaged. On the other hand, as men get older, their penis doesn't necessarily react so quick even if he is very interested and turned on, his penis may not be hard yet or at all, but it doesnt mean they aren't aroused. So I wouldn't pin any hope of a particular interest in you based on what the penis is doing. I am sure the kind of interest you want is in the total you, not just for sex.
Not saying he isn't interested in you that way but if he is, he may be thinking the same thing that many people might, that it is wrong since you grew up together as sister and brother. Some may even go as far as saying it is incest.
The only concern and real reason for marrying close blood relations was medical problems that came from inbreeding. You two are not blood related so that wouldn't even apply. So the best thing is to go about this thinking as if he wasnt a step brother. How do you start conversations wiht other guys where you steer the convo in the direction of how much you enjoy them? At some point after getting to know them, a step you can jump past cus you already know each other fairly well, one person needs to tell the other they are starting to have romantic feelings for the other and see how they react. This is the only way you're going to find out for sure. But stating it as it isn't a fully blown fact yet, your feelings, it doesnt make the other feel awkward or put on the spot if they dont feel the same. He either has to say he could never see you as anything but a sister, or he'd need to be willing to give his mind time to get around the fact that you are related by parents marriage and realize that since you're not blood kin, there's no medical reason for not pairing up to the point of having kids someday. You can't expect him to be any braver than you here so if you dont want to go on your whole life just wondering or feeling the hurt if and when he marries someone, not knowing if it could have worked between you, the best way is for you to broach the subject with him.
Good luck dear.
i bought my second mom two loop scarves for mother's day...she is in her early 50's....one is leopard print and the other is red with designs....was this a good gift?
Yes, thats a good gift. Actually, any gift that is given from the heart, whether hand made or store bought is a good gift cus its given out of feelings you have for another, not of a feeling it's an obligation, something you have to do to save face.
The most perfect gifts tho will be even more meaningful if in a favorite color, a favorite theme or a much needed, long wished for and wanted item. I try to keep my ears open throughout the year watching how a loved one reacts over seeing something that they end up not purchasing and if possible and I can afford it or something similar, I keep a mental list of such things to use when christmas, birthdays, anniversaries and such roll by.
The fact she isn't your birth mom and you gave it because you love and respect her likely really touched her heart.
I am someone who loves and lives by routine. If I do something I have to plan it and my life isn't particularly exciting. I came away from a movie recently thinking how I want to change this and howni need to embrace life and live in the moment before I see what is so often the case when people get to a certain age and realise they didn't do that.
I don't want to live completely carelessly but what are things I can do to be spontaneous, live life to the max, embrace life etc. I mean, I have a full time job and rent and bills to pay so things like travelling around the world type of thing, though exciting, isn't really an option.
Any help, tips etc appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
P.s. I'm aware of the irony of planning spontaneity!
You have a sense of humor. It didnt occur to me until your PS comment.
Okay lets go with the list idea and say Friday nights are when you do laundry so you can have your Saturday to spend on yourself, even if its planned out ahead. Here's how you can become less rigid living by a schedule and spontaneous. If a friend asks you to go with them to a movie Friday night but thats laundry night, you would have to shift laundry to another day to go out Friday. Schedules are good but if you can't ever switch a few things, then yes, life is too predictable, you always know what comes next and then is no change or anything to challenge or engage your mind and imagination. Its the same to me as having a budget cus money is tight and having to stick rigidly to a plan on how much to spend on each area. What do you do when an unexpected bill or event shows up. Lets say something happens and you need to get a new tire for your car. There is no savings so the money to take care of this unexpected thing has to come from the strict budget. So you plan to use some of your budgeted grocery money and clothing money to pay for it so you have to spend less in those other areas. Learning to shift things around without worrying about it could help you.
I also like to try shaking up things when with a certain person or friends who really know me well and say something I wouldn't normally say cus its not part of my personality or suggest doing something I would not normally do. Half the time, I am not seriously considering the thing I suggest but it is a whole lot of fun to watch the expressions on faces and hear the laughter. Sometimes, its a simple thing like that which can make life more fun. Hmm, living in the moment, I suppose it could vary according to who you ask. I always go for whats simple, if a song started playing at a store or whereever i might be that I really like, I might say oh I like this song, and not look to see if anyone else is watching but just start singing along or at least humming it. If its grocery shopping and its on the schedule and you're at the market when that song comes on, you're still sticking to your schedule but the spontaneous part is doing something different in this shopping trip that you haven't done in others like singing to a song, starting up a conversation with the lady who is also picking out fruit or whatever, or maybe just complimenting the clerk on her jewelry if you usually never do that. Its the different things, like spices added to a meal, that make the meal, or life more exciting. Good luck. And if you want to run some ideas by me to see what I think, let me know.
What do I do with a crazy diabetic grandmother who does not take her insulin and lives an hour and a half away?
Seriously, this is actually happening, and letting her move in to our house is out of the question.
If she has serious mental issues or memory problems where she won't take her meds on time as needed, then perhaps it is time for her to be in a nursing home where staff look in on her regularly and make sure she is taking any needed medication like insulin. Short of that, the only other thing would be to talk to a social worker who works on behalf of elder peoples welfare and see about getting regular state paid nurse-caregivers to check in on her once or twice a day, to make sure she is taking insulin.
I used to work as a caregiver. I know how hard it can be and life changing to have an elder person move in with relatives if there is a lot of care needed. The more disabilities or mental health or elderly health issues, the harder it is and family then become the caregiver and resentment at losing their own life, living it the way they want, often sets in. We don't want to resent our elderly relatives for stealing away our lives when they need care, so there is nothing wrong with finding other ways, other people to take care of all their daily needs.
I am 16 years old and have known my romantic partner (age 17) for about a year, and almost 4 months of that year we have been dating, all the time before then we were close friends who would lowkey flirt with each other from the very beginning. We were immediately extremely compatible in both friendship and then with our romantic relationship, and have both been there for each other through the very best of times and the very worst of times. (And i do mean the very worst; we've each talked the other down from suicide at least once now)
Although we have never had a fight, we've discussed fighting, and how we both are when we fight or argue with someone, and talked about how to handle it when it happens one day, bc we both know and accept that of course one day we are going to fight or argue.
Although 4 months seems so short, i feel like i've known them my whole life, as if there was never a time we weren't dating, and they have expressed the same feelings to me.
Our relationship is extremely open (communication-wise, it is not a polyamory deal) and has always been so healthy, we've made compromises and sacrifices and we know that one day we will get married. We have discussed this on several occasions, that after we are both graduated from high school, sometime after that we'll be getting married. We are both very committed to the relationship and know we are in love, and i know that people change from their teen years throughout their adult years, but we're both so committed and willing to make sacrifices for the other and so open with our feelings that i know it will work out, because we'll both be able to talk things through if/when they start to get rocky in later years.
We currently wear promise rings.
Tonight we discussed engagement, and the fact that there is no age requirement to get engaged, so technically we could get engaged. We've both expressed many times before that we wish we could be engaged, that we both want to propose so badly. They basically implied tonight that they want to pop the question, or vise versa, sometime in the near future.
My question is, is this too fast, is it too soon? I'm perfectly happy with the pace things are moving at, people can meet their true loves and know it at younger ages after all, but a comment a girl made about "Promise rings at 3 months?!!" last month got me worried that maybe it is too early?? I personally feel more than ready and i know they do also, but....I don't know, i'm questioning my feelings now bc of what others might say/think? (Also yeah, i know, i should talk to them about this, i know i should and i will, but i also wanted to hear what others have to say about this) Will add information as needed if there are any questions or misunderstandings, i appreciate any and all advice and opinions!!
Lets see if I got this right. From how i interpret, it sounds like you both want to propose and get engaged. However you didn't explain what proposing to each other entails in your mind as its carried out for real.
You wonder if it is too early to become engaged and it would seem the only reason you are wondering and have some doubt is because of girl commenting on promise rings? And since it was from someone your age, a peer and they likely were questioning your wisdom or something like that, you now aren't sure.
I guess I'd need to know the reasoning behind the promise rings. I have heard of promise rings but only in a movement in Christian churches that has become popular recently, at least during the time my daughters were going thru puberty. I will tell you what I know so in case you are wearing them for the same reason. The church promise ring was for girls and guys who would get taught about staying pure for their marriage partner and also promise not to have sex even with the person they may intend to marry, until their marriage night. ONce upon a time, I blindly went along with this and my first 2 daughters agreed to wear promise rings. My beliefs changed vastly by time my youngest got to that age and she decided not to wear one. You mention romance, but not sex so it may very well apply that you both are from CHristian families and are wearing promise rings which are not the equivalent of an engagement ring to them. Since many marriages and engagements break up around the world every day, we could say that the rings have no significance on whether a relationship will work for life or not. Rings are a symbol, nothing more. That which makes a relationship work, grow and solidy over time is not the symbolics or a ring or even celebrating an anniversary but it is the every day hard work that both put in equally to the relationship, no matter the age.
If you want to wear it because of how you feel about each other, I can't see wearing one as speeding things up in any way, especially since you sound like you're aware of all the things people will say, so you seem to be very intelligent. You intend to wait until after you graduate to marry and that is good. I know I married at 20 and it didn't work out. If I had the life experience I have now in my late fifties that I had at 19,20...I would never have married him because there were warning signs easy to see for a person who knows what to look for to know that a person is not right for you and also has some traits that are destructive to a love relationship. I didn't know and had to learn the hard way. I can't presume to know what things you have in store to learn and experience in your life and it may not be in the area of relationships anyways.
I know many will balk at your age, but I understand if you want to wear rings now, and its based on your vows and promises to each other, thats fine. oNly if your feelings change in a couple years, then you need to be honest and break those vows by speaking to each other as kindly as possible.
So I'm 12 female. For as long as I can remember spirits seemed...drawn to me? Like I was always visited, I could tell my parents things that only them and that particular dead relative knew because he/she told me. Still do. I was never really creeped by it. I eventually found out no one else was seeing them, and kept to myself. I'm reluxtant to ask on here because I know people will think I'm crazy, but this IS an anonymous website. A day ago, I was having a very bad day when I was in my room and I felt someone hug me. It felt exactly like a living person hug but different. A 14-16 year old boy spirit who talked to me for a while then started singing till I went to sleep. This has never happened before. Can spirits hug?
Hi Hon. I think you are brave to even say anything on here cus those who can't see and hear in some way just are not going to believe. Although I can not see or hear with physical senses, I can pick up on things with my inner eyes and ears, and its something i've been doing since my late teens. Even so, I've had enough experiences that can't be explained away any other way. But I can tell you its real. Spirits let you know they are there by using your senses to either smell a perfume they used to wear, hear a part of a song that no one else can hear playing that was a tune they hummed or a favorite song, even sometimes leaving little objects behind or moved, and yes feeling a kind of warmth or a touch. I remember a time when my heart was broken by a boyfriend who left me, before I met my 2nd husband. I wasn't living near family then and had no close friends to talk to and was sitting one night feeling so hurt and alone when i felt a touch on my shoulder. Not as firm as a hand, but my skin felt and tingled from some energy that felt like a hand rubbing so I immediately asked, "Who are you" not aloud but mentally like telepathy, thats how I talk to God, my angels or any other spirit form. I heard that this soul was someone who loved me many lifetimes ago and was urged to come to me just this one time to encourage me and help me feel better, that someone does care what I am going through...and it did help and I have never heard of that spirit again. Then when I first saw my spirit guide, not believing it was a real possiblity and not looking for it, it was a shock when in my minds eye I clearly saw a man, complete with how his hair, eyes and clothing looked and when I asked, said he was my spirit guide. I wasn't going to accept anything that I hadn't got an okay from God on and I had many years experience of hearing from GOd so I asked and was told not to fear this guide. Still, I doubted that I had really experienced it so I said in my mind, directed to my guide, "Okay, I am still not sure about you so if you are real then I want you to prove it to me by tapping me on the head or on the shoulder when there is no one else around who could do it and you have anytime in the next 3 days to do it. I then promptly forgot as we were invited to stay a weekend at some friends place. While 3there one evening sitting in a chair, i felt 4 or 5 distinct taps on top of my head and i whipped around to peer over the high back of the chair thinking it was one of their kids playing pranks because it felt so real. No one was there and thats when I remembered the thing I had asked of my spirit guide. I know a girl I worked with who came back from a trip to her home country to tell us, she thinks her dead relatives were trying to let her know they were there because as she sat with family, she kept feeling what felt like a housefly landing on her leg or arm and she'd keep swatting without looking until family asked her what she was doing and then they said they had been watching for a while cus she'd been doing the swatting motion too often that it distracted them and they never saw a fly land on her ever in that time. She and I did not have nervouse tics in our body, involuntary movements of muscles...we know that, so all I can say is that some people are able to do this.
I see it as abilities our souls should all be able to do. If created in Gods image, these are the kinds of traits, ability to talk to and connect with others who aren't in front of you, able to heal others like jesus did, things some would call miracles or magick or mental problems simply because they have not experienced it themselves. Experience is the greatest way to believing sometimes. There are many who can tell a story of at least one strange incidence in their life that they can't explain, why they just somehow knew not to take the same road to work that day and avoided getting into a multi car collision because of it, or some such story.
WHEN you get older and become an adult at 18, I would suggest you seek out others who have the same abilities. Read all the literature you can on spiritual gifting like clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience, and so on. THere are people who fake it to make a living. But there are good honest people who simply accept it as part of who they are, and something as natural as breathing or blinking ones eyes. Good luck dear.
I'm 17 years old, almost 18, and I've never dated anyone until now. My boyfriend is from Canada and I'm in the Northern part of the United States. We met online through a chat app, then after talking for a while, moved to Facebook. In total, we've been talking about six months and have doing text, voice, and video chatting. My family is extremely strict and say I'm not allowed to date or should focus on something that's not stupid, like school. Only two of my siblings, out of four, have ever dated and the others will not. I talk to my boyfriend on my phone and my mother wants to take my phone unless I'm at school. I'm not allowed to have a password and all of them will occasionally look through my phone or email. They would be extremely mad if they found out and not allow me to ever talk to him again, which I don't want. I know most will say move out but I don't have a car, I can't drive, and have no money. What can I do to keep them from finding out? Even if I told them truthfully, they'd have the same reaction. They're very religious and I'm basically the black sheep of the family, always getting yelled at. Thank you!
I come from a religious background..by choice, not parents but I saw enough to realize that what starts with good intentions, my self as an example as a parent, can easily grow over time to become a twisted distorted choices and laws and boundaries made out of the want to protect and raise our children right. I still want to cry and feel remorseful when I think of how one daughter told me her teacher was going to read Harry Potter to the class over the next few weeks and I told the teacher it went against our religious beliefs and I didn't want my daughter to listen to that story. The teacher said my daughter could bring a book of her own and sit out in the hallway by the classroom during the time she read to class. I feel so horrible now for putting my daugther through that. Luckily for them, thru a chance of events, I became more open minded spiritual and more into thinking for myself and questioning church stances by investigating for myself, rather than blindly taking in and believing what I was told at church. There is plenty literature out there and plenty of stories of the real facts when it comes to whats the best way to teach our children and with the internet, theres even more info. I don't know if your parents will ever wake up and I don't know that there is any way to hide what you do without them finding out. About the only thing I can think of depends on whether they will allow you to get a job. ONce you have your own money, buy your own phone where you prepay for the time you use. Use the phone they've given you for calling girlfriends. Hide and use yours to call him. Once you are 18, you can do as you wish. I understand if you have the need to live under their roof, at 18 or older, they will still attempt to call the shots and rule your life. What you could do if not going off to a college, is to start work and earn enough money to afford to rent a room in a house, lots of people make extra money in tight times doing this and most prefer to rent to college aged single people. Or at 18, get involved in a church of your own choosing so there can be no trickle back of info to your parents, and ask your pastor to help you find a congregation member who might like a little extra pocket money and will rent you a room, allowing you to live with them. And once out from under the parents roof, start dating.
Since your parents have shielded you from learning rather than allowing you to learn as you go and be there to give advice and support, you will need to self teach about dating, relationships, sex, everything. There are some good books out there, lots of helpful blogs, youtube websites and such but right now, until you are 18 and living out from under the parents roof, its going to be hard. ITs best to focus on learning the bus schedules for now, thinking of where it may be easiest to get a job as soon as you turn 18, and who you might reach out to for help in gaining your own independence for a place to live for cheap. Lastly is making new friends through work, not necessarily others like you at church, and a couple of friends getting an apt togehter with you to be able to afford one. Since you turn 18 soon, I'd say that is where your focus should be right now. Your family finding out after you are 18 and what they think or say or how they treat you is of no circumstance. The worst they could do is to shun you and want nothing to do with you. Its hurts. It happened to me once with MOm, with Dad after they divorced and one sister taking sides with believing dad for a period of time from many months to a year. It hurts but giving away control of my life to family or parents when I was an adult with kids of my own was not an option I would consider, even if given an ultimatum to do as they wish or lose them in my life. Blood is too thick for it to last forever. At some point, parents, though not happy you aren't following exactly the path they had planned for you, are still parents and will find after they get past the shock or hurt, that they are ready to want you back in their life. Sorry but I had to put in worst case scenerio as many young people write with parents giving them the ultimatum thing and feeling torn and so they cave in. Caving in would be the worst thing you can do for yourself. You are in control of your own life after you become an adult, not your parents. I have my own ideas about everything that differ from how my parents believed and did things to how my siblings did and still do. The only life you have the right and ability to change for the better is your own. Get used to the idea dear...it;ll be hard. But its not impossible and you do have God on your side. Keep HIM in your thoughts and talk to God even if you dont hear back cus like me, the day will come when all that practice talking one way will have strengthened that spiritual muscle so you find you are able to hear back, instantly like in a real conversation, not left hanging with no answer. God will be able to guide you in your decisions and what paths to take that will help your soul grow in the ways most beneficial to you in this life. God won't lead you wrong. When I asked God if I should marry my ex, He did say yes, it was okay. What i didn't know it that the man I was to marry would be verbally abusive and not ever be in love with me and knowing it beforehand. Looking back, I know God had this planned for me, an abusive marriage to create the harsh force that would compel me to grow in ways I couldnt have otherwise. I could have learned the lesson sooner and left the guy before having kids but I wasn't ready.
Trust God with your life decisions and paths over your parents, as parents are human and prone to making mistakes, sometimes grave errors in the raising of their kids, as I did. I did lots right too though because most the time, I was asking Gods advice. ANd so lastly, I advise you learn to hear back from God if you don't currently, as in real time conversation. I ask a thought in my head and Gods answer pops into my mind telepathically as soon as I've finished asking, no wondering or worrying if I am just hearing my own thoughts. Due to some things I was asked or told to do, it surely wasn't stuff I was brave enough to do at the time . It takes constant talking to but not hearing back for months maybe a year before you develop that spiritual muscle that allows you to fine tune yourself to be able to hear the answers that were always coming back but you werent able to hear before. Having God for advice or just to encourage has been the biggest thing in my life that has been with me step by step helping me become the person I am today. Good luck dear and if you feel the need to talk about anything else, I will be here.
i have been with my boyfriend for some time now and things seem to have gone 1 sided now that i have got myself a job i enjoy. this isn't the issue it will get resolved when he gets used to me working again.
the issue is i now have his brother asking me to meet him at college while he has some free time and asking me if he can come to my house for a bit or to my parents house if its free because he will get board.
its now starting to make things complicated for me wanting to see my boyfriend as they live together with the rest of siblings and parents.
i do not know how i can go about this without cause a massive family dispute or should i leave the relationship to seek happiness elsewhere?
I can not go to my friends or family about this as they do not like my boyfriend. some guidance would be really appreciated.
Being bored and wanting to just come hang out at your place once in a while is one thing. But his brother wanting to meet you at his college during his free time is another. Its okay to have friendship bonds with family of ones boyfriend and especially so if married. But I am suspicious, not knowing anything more than what you've written. And my first thoughts are that boyfriends brother may have ulterior motives, no matter his age, just wanting to be around you as much as possible cus he worships you, or despite the fact that you are his brothers girlfriend, has also developed feelings for you and being with you or near you as much as possible helps him feel good or better, even tho he may not want to come out and confirm how he feels.
So if I got this right and his brother does have feelings developing for you, that kind of friction between the brothers, not to mention what suspicion your boyfriend might create in his mind, could be enough to kill the relationship if you don't take care right away to bring it out in the open by letting your boyfriend know his brother isn't doing anything really wrong but its enough to make you wonder if he's crazy about you. Use your womans intuition...if you get those ooky feelings at times when the brother is with you, there's a chance there's more to it than a brother feeling you're a friend.
Am I to assume you live with yours? You didn't say. Depending on your age, if you have your own apartment, then you have the right to refuse to have his brother come over and of course you can tell him its not appropriate for you to hang out with him so much, like meeting at school since you are his brothers girlfriend, not his.
But I am more inclined to believe you also live with your parents and that being reason why you told us that your family doesn't approve of him. It seems you don't have much choice but to visit him at his parents or find places to go and hang out together, a diner, the movies, at the park, etc.
I don't know the situation dear whether the family are just biased people and your boyfriend is a jewel of a person and if the best thing for you is to ignore their feelings, OR
whether due to being in love and seeing through rose colored glasses, you are not able to see the things they see in him, the problems/issues they truly see, are not made up in their heads, that they feel you are settling for less than the best, etc. If you are an adult, you have to make the best decision that you know how at the time being, and decide for yourself whether you are settling for less, or worse, like I was at 20 when I married and discovered my husband was not the Godly church going man I thought but was abusive to me, I made excuses up for him in my mind and to other people. My family were fooled at first too but after a year of marriage, there was enough issues they'd witnessed that family told me to leave him. I didn't. It took me a life time to really learn some things so that I became capable of leaving him and finding a wonderful man the second time a round. When it became apparent there really was a problem with him, I still stayed out of loyalty, out of refusal to have to admit I made a mistake in judgement of character. This is easy to do when we don;t have enough life experience to see the warning signs. Looking back, I now know the signs were there. And you did say things were one sided but that wasn't the issue. Okay, maybe you know that is so, but I wonder why you subconsciously needed to write that down if you werent really sure yourself, just hopeful.
I have a little extra advice just in case, beyond the issue you wanted help on: of only being able to see boyfriend at his parents and unwanted siblings hanging around. You don't throw a real good relationship away just because circumstance surrounding the relationship get tough. So the decision to keep or ditch the boyfriend should be made entirely on his character, who he is at core and how he treats you consistantly, close to 100% of the time.
There is this cat that roams around my grandmother's neigborhood and that we feed when he comes to her house. I really love this cat(he is really friendly and loveable), but the problem is that since he's an outdoor cat basically, he likes to fight and is now in really bad shape and might be sick. So last night, when I was praying I told God that it may be the cat's time for him to go to heaven and to shoe me a sign if I'm wrong. Early in the morning, I had a dream about said cat. Is this a sign or just pure coinsidence?
The dream was likely not a sign. Our subconsious minds pick up on the things that weigh most on our conscious mind during the day, somethings it stuff that happened to us, or just our thoughts, but it is most likely things that have a significant degree of interest or importance to it that will then turn up in our dreams.
This happens to me all the time.
Hii..!I hope someone can help me so here i am.. So i know this one guy for 8 years and this past year we became very close if nothing more then best friends... He told me many stuff that i dont think he would tell anyone, i think maybe some of them only his parent,his best friend and i know.. He is actually really shy in person but not that much around me but he is still shy while trough texts he is really open and everything we talk about lots and lots of things.. But i had to fall in love with him.. But the thing is i think he is in love with me also..Bc people around us say that he is and his best friends teases me a little bit about him.. I got used to talking to him every night and i dont want that to go.. We talk late sometimes 2 am but sometimes even 5 am... But the thing is he told me that he is moving on in capital city from my country and there girls are really open put make up in early age ,dress up very scandalous and revealing( butt and boobs in first plan) and im not like that,, So im affriad that he will totally forget about me and our firendship or some kind of relationship bc when we talk i feel like we are dating.. It came to the point that i cant go to sleep before he sends me good night.. And i dont know what to do.. Our conversation was a little off last night i think it was because he told me that he is moving but later it became normal.. but usually he sends me messsage in the morning but not today. So my point is that i dont know what to do i dont feel like i should tell him that i like him bc what if doesnt like me back and if he does would it still matter because he is moving... And also one more thing in all of this i discovered that i dont love myself at all.. I always thing the owrst things about myself and main thing that im ugly ( i mean im not really ugly i just think that there are more beautiful girls outhere then me).. It stupid for me to say this but people around me tell me that i am really good person i can give good advices and that im good friend and also that im crazy at time to time(in a good way) and im also really good student(straight A's) so thats why i also think people dont really want to meet me at first.But when tehy meet me they always say how im chill and laid back and they dont know how i got that good grades when i dont study at all... I went from one thing to another i really hope u can help me.. By the way im 16 and i know that life is in front of me and everything but i am living in this moment and its not going really good at this time.. Thank you.. :*
-J
Hello J,
To find a best friend, one with whom you can feel free to be yourself and share all your thoughts and secrets without fear of being hurt or betrayed somehow is a wonderful thing. In fact, I believe that the most successful marriage are built on a foundation of two things, one being that the two are best of friends and that there is the romantic chemistry there.
You already have the friendship part. However, at 16, you're likely still in school and in the US one isn't considered an adult until 18, I don't know about your country. If you are old enough to be an adult and able to make your own decisions in life, I'd recommend to say something for sure about the feelings you're having towards him. As you said you don't know for sure but you do have lots of positive feedback about his happiness when with you, from others.
I know from my own life that finding those best friends or close friends in life isn't as common as easy as one would think. We are all unique as individuals and there will never be anyone exactly like him, maybe a different version, something close but not exactly the same so when you have a best friend, someone like that is to be treasured.
Now I know he's moving away so you won't have time to hang out in person, but I don't see that as any reason to stop talking. Its also possible for a girl to have male friends and later also a husband without there being any conflict for any of the males involved.
If your best friend was just a female friend (no romance) would you still consider stopping contact with her? I don't think so. I kept in touch with a girlfriend who moved to another state and married and had kids. I've only had contact by letters first and by computers later when they were created.
I think in your mind the romantic feelings you've developed are more your concern here. Everyone has their own taste in what they like from clothes to food to music to people. It is also true that people change and grow and mature from the time they are in school yet to college and even late 20s. So what we like while in our teens could truly change enough in a handful of years to make a difference.
If you were already an adult, I would say its better to let the guy know of your feelings and take the chance because if you don't, you'd wonder for the rest of your life of the what ifs in case he did feel something too and want to explore dating more and plans to marry possibly.
But at 16 and I assume he's close to the same age if a couple years older, and with life circumstances such as his moving, aren't such that you can explore that avenue of dating a while to see where it goes romantically. In a couple of years though, once you are an adult, it's 18 in the US, it's a different story and you could choose to go to college near where he is and date and see how it goes or if you have the means to make such a move yourself, get a job in his city and your own place to live and date him to see where it leads.
I am not saying that you can't tell him how you feel but there is a way to do so without scaring him away as a friend if he doesnt feel the same at all, or not yet but may later. Instead of saying I am in love or I love you or I have feelings for you....all which are stated as being a solid fact right this minute, state it as something that is just starting to happen...a weird thought psychologically for those who hear it, making it more acceptable, as something young, not yet fully formed that can be nipped in the bud and stopped right now so to speak and that makes a person feel more comfortable to be honest and let you know they don't have those kinds of feelings or only see you as a friend. SO you let him know, if you want to say something, that you are beginning to have stronger feelings for him than just friendship feelings...and that way he can encourage them by letting you know he feels the same or tell you the opposite. The disappointment from finding its not the same is a one time occurance that will take time to get over. But the always wondering your entire life if things could have been different if you had the bravery to say something is a turmoil and wondering ache in your heart for the rest of your life. Its up to you, but I'd rather go for the hurt that lasts for a season rather than a life time of wondering and longing for something that may never have been possible in the first place.
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As for how you see yourself, some females have lesser or greater self image. Media's version of beauty has conditioned all of us, even if we say we don't buy into it, that one kind of look is prettier than another. Again, a persons self preferance comes in. Some guys are drawn to the model types, but others prefer the girl next door type, or don't mind a female who is more tomboyish, more of the outdoor hiking and fishing buddy plus his lover. Body shape and style varies differing on the person. I know all this and I still get days when the thought comes to me briefly that I don't feel pretty enough although I know its not true and counteract that negative thought with all I know to be true, the compliments from my husband and the admiring glances and smiles from men I don't know, just in public. I don't turn every head, but I still do turn a few. So this means for one guy, you won't be pretty enough in his eyes, and yet for another, he'll wonder why he is so lucky to deserve such a beautiful Goddess.
I hope I've been able to help you dear.
My tampon is stuck around some skin thing can't get it out at all, I don't think it's my hymen cause I got it in and out easily yesterday. It comes out as far as I can see it then it doesn't go any further cause of the skin restricting it and it hurts so badly when I pull it :((( I am freaking out please help x
I am betting that even tho it went in, the reason its not coming out is due to having a septate hymen. This means instead of extra skin around the circumferance making the vagina area smaller, it grew in a strip of skin straight down center or off center creating two equal sized or one large one smaller openings much much smaller than if the hymen grew in the usual way.
So yes, you need to see a Dr. because a tampon can't stay in over long without creating dangerous toxins in your body that can make you very ill, like a hospital stay ill. SAnd secondly you'll need a Dr. to not just remove it but to snip away this strip of skin. Look on line for pics of septate hymens. Apparently when grown this way, they are tough little buggers that won't stretch or break off on their own and any attempt to do that on own or having stuck tampons is very painful. I remember talking to a girl on here who wrote back after talking to me. SHe let her mother know of the problem and even her Mom tried herself to remove it and couldn't and they ended up at the doctor and thats how I learned about septated hymens. So let Mom know you need to see a Dr. if you want the moral support or go to your family Dr. on your own to get help. Either way, embarassing as this is, it can't be ignored and you have to get medical help.
The good thing is once its done, you won't have a problem again with tampons getting stuck.
Ok so as i said in the last one me and boyfriend have been dating for two months as of tomorrow. But i have kinda been worried that I have low key been cheating. Like there is this one guy at my school who i think is hot, but i don't flirt with him or anything i just think he is cute. So i don't think that is cheating. But another thing is that these two guys in my class like to touch my butt and it doesn't make me uncomfortable, so i don't care if they do it. Is that considered cheating? And lastly before i started dating my boyfriend,he had told me he liked someone else ( unknowing that i liked him ) and i think that i am starting to have feelings for one of the guys who touch my butt all the time. I haven't and wont do anything about liking him ( meaning i wont flirt with him or anything) but i feel really bad because i love my boyfriend and he has told me he loves me. And i would do anything for him. I don't know if i have been cheating but i am trying hard to cover up those feelings for the other guy and focus on my main guy
I'll start with the boys who touch your butt. As Razhie stated, that is considered sexual touching and will fall into the lines of sexual harassment.
I know you don't see it that way but let me explain the two things happening here. Females going through puberty and in their teens or even early twenties, have a built in natural desire to have attention paid to them to verify that they are beautiful females and no longer a child. Most girls will hopefully get positive input from their Dads to take care of this natural need in the process of growing up. Its as simple as Dad making comments that you are growing up so fast you look like your Mom did that that age, very pretty and that soon he'll have to be chasing away guys at the door coming to see you. Those kinds of comments are needed. I remember even asking Dads opinion not just on my new earrings or shoes but some art piece I did. Girls who dont get this or enough of it growing up, will turn to negative attention. Any attention being better than none. So its likely that the reason you haven't said anything, complained or asked them to stop is because you have a need deep down on a subconscious level you're not aware of that is possibly why you've found yourself enjoying that kind of attention. Logically it makes sense, these boys are showing you that they find you desireable and sexy...but its not necessarily in a fully positive way. For one thing, guys allowed to get away with this kind of thing become the bosses who allow sexual harassment in the office and do so themselves, threatening to fire you if you don't sleep with them. Without repercussions, the boys will just become worse in how they treat females as sex objects and use girls, pretending to love them only to get sex and ocne tired of them, dump them. I highly doubt that is the kind of guy you want. No rational girl wants that but inadvertantly, we take part in training them either by commission or omission.
So I've mentioned the need for positive male appreciation for your femaleness and also the problem of young men getting away with something that will escalate. The feelings you are having for the guy touching your butt is probably tied in to the need for male verification and since he's giving it, you find yourself responding inside. But to get together with him would be a big mistake. You've sent a message already that it is okay to use you as a sex object so if in a relationship with him, you won't amount to anything more with him and itll all be about his gratification and not an equal relationship of loving each other and the male loving all of you not just your sexual side.
So is it cheating? No. Your reason for doing it is out of a real female need we all go thru some more than others. I know some who'd disagree cus they never really felt much obvious like that as a young lady. But now that I've told you what is going on, if you continue to allow other men to touch you and you enjoy it, then you are on the cusp of cheating cus its not long before you are seeking not only this kind of emotional satisfaction but more emotional support and the sexual gratification. The difference I hope you are seeing is in whether you dislike their touching you or whether you like it. It makes the difference between having a case to report to police of sexual harassment if they are warned and it doesnt stop cus you are totally blameless. We live in an unfair society as far as law and a female not complaining against such treatment is the same in the minds of many males in law, as the female liking the treatment, condoning it, accepting it happily. So you need to make up your mind now that you know. If you need more verification and building up as a female, let your boyfriend know you need to hear his compliments, his thoughts spoken out loud to you of how much he likes how you look, even the sexual comments...because between 2 lovers it is appropriate.
I just also wanted to mention that I am also disabled with mental health problems are there any adult services that I could call since I am receiving social security benefits?
If you are hooked in with DSHS as an adult disabled, and have mental health issues, I know that you have a case worker, someoone you see at least once every 6 months as a check up to see if anything has changed. They have their set questions they ask. What you need to do is to get a call into that person and let them know what is going on and ask them to put the right persons in touch with you to get you help. Whether you live with Mom or on your own and she's coming over to harass you, the right person can set in motion what needs to be done.
Good luck dear.
I'm not sure how to decorate my bedroom I love modern type rooms but I am on a budget. I love soft colours but bold colours are good too the room has to have an element of white in it but no black elements. I have two sets of doors one going to the hall way which is a single doorway and I have a double doorway leading to the bathroom. Please advise me on this subject unfortunately I do not do as well decorating as I do in the cooking department I am way better at cooking.
I love watching shows on home decor on a budget and tho I never used the exact things they showed, it at least got my creative juices going in the right direction, seeing other possibilities.
What I personally find helpful is to have a theme. YOu'll see this if you've ever gone to bed and breakfasts, each room most often has a theme or at least a name. It can range from the seaside room, to the garden room, or the victorian room, or even mythical like the Fairy room. I love bringing the garden indoors or at least the look of it. My dream is to paint the walls a nice sky blue and get light weight lattice like for growing vines to hold in place with some of those L shaped screws and silk trailing vines, and a little indoor fountain for the water sound. I might paint clouds on the ceiling like I did for a daughters room. I dont know what your favorite items or themes might be but my example hopefully gives you an idea of how easy it is once you've decided on a theme.
Since you have doors taking up a lot of space, if you want to take focus off a set of doors, consider encorporating them into a mural. Decide what you'd like for a mural. I went to a hairdresser who paid a student artist to come do a mural of a jungle on one wall. She of course asked to see samples of their work first to see if it was something she'd like and I tell you, it was amazing. Good luck.
Ok i am going to make this quick. I have been dating my boyfriend for about 1 month and our 2nd month anniversary is tomorrow. We haven't kissed yet, so i have been planning to surprise him by kissing him tomorrow. But i am nervous and i don't know when to do it. We aren't in the same classes and we don't have the same lunch time. at the begging of the day i could see him, but he is a bus rider and i am a car so that will be hard to arrange (same in the afternoon) I have already told him i have a surprise for him i just don't know when to give it to him. And this is my first kiss so i don't know what to do and how to surprise him correctly. Plus he is shorter than me so i don't know how that would work. Since we are in school teachers don't let us kiss but i don't really see him on the weekends. So basically to sum that all up
1. I need to know how to kiss him since he is shorter than me
2. i need ideas of when to do it
3. i need ways to surprise him the right way
PLEASE HELP ME
I am wondering when you had a chance to meet if not on same transportation and not in any classes together. Am I to assume then that altho you are dating, none of its been done in person, only via texting? There must be some way you first met him and that should be your clue when to approach him. If you can't visit after school at your own homes or somewhere in your own neighborhoods, then there isn't an obvious way. This takes some planning and if you dont have his number to call ittll be harder and you're trying to come up witha plan the day before. Try to give yourself more time next time you want to plan something. All I can think of it 1. Does Mom know hes not in your classes, cus if so, and its okay with his Mom, he could come home with you under the pretence of doing homework together but you both would have had to work out which class that you have same text books for, you will have on hand and you'd have to appear to be doing studies if the parents are checking on you. If watched closely, you could announce taking a break to stretch your legs and you both are going around the block for a short walk and will be right back. On the walk, away from sight of home is where you give him a kiss. Or if either of you live in the same direction of the school and you clear it with parents that its a nice day and you want to walk home with a friend, then during that walk, you kiss him.
But as I said, it takes planning and you're out of time to perhaps get this set up right.
As for the kiss itself, difference in height isn't a problem unless one person is a foot taller than the other. It can still be done but the taller person has to bend over quite a bit or even bend their knees lowering themselves. Seated is easier for height difference of a great amt since most extra height is in the length of legs and once sitting, both peoples lips are much closer to the same height. All one needs to do is to make sure your nose goes to one side or the other of his, and then let your lips kiss him, much the same as a kiss on the cheek of a relative. Once he's over the surprise and enjoying it, it;ll be seconds before he and you are both opening your mouths to continue a kiss. You might even give him some Hersheys kisses before hand saying its a clue to what his actual surprise is or give them after saying its a reminder to him for couple days after of your own kiss.