about

I'm Almedina. I'm foreign, and I'm pretty much ready to handle whatever life throws at me. Ha, pretty random that I go from being foreign to life,but anyways. I've had this column for about two yearsnow, and I don't update it as I should, or want to but with school and this crazy teenage life of mine, it gets pretty hard to do so. I've been giving advice to all my friends since I can remember and I love trying to help them. I'm out going and extrememly loud once you get to know me. I'm usually shy at first unless I've gotten to know you. I don't understand life sometimes. But I've got my whole life to figure out the meaning of it. I'm selfish at times, and stubborn. I care too much about things I shouldn't and not enough about the MOST important things in my life. I'm very annoyed with people at times, and tend to just block everyone out. I'm afraid to say I'm in love, but I'm not afraid of love itself. I'm myself and that's all I can be. I've gone through a lot, so I'm willing to help in whatever way I can (:

advice

my sweet 16s coming up and i'm wondering who i should invite i mean like do i invite the friends of my friends who i don't really talk to? or just like everyone in my school or what? i'm totally clueless

Word of advice - DON'T invite just anyone. Trust me, you'll probably end up with drama, problems, etc. Invite people who you talk to regularly & usually, because after all it is your sixteenth and you want to spend it with people whom you get along with and you like. Have fun.

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Okay, so I just started hanging out with a new group of guys like 2 weeks ago. All my friends have been hanging out w/ them their whole lives. I can't warm up to them. I get all cramped up when i see them and i don't put myself out there. I know i can do it because i'm super flirtatious and outgoing w/ other guys and people. Its just this certain group, i just can't do it. They aren't super attractive or anything some of them are actually ugly but they have that confidence level that i can't get over. I don't like any of them in that way i just want to have a good time when i hang out with them. And i can't do it just standing around and looking at other people have fun. I need some way to get over my scared feelings. I've been told like a thousand times to just "be myself" I need something good. Thanks in advance :)

Well "being yourself" is the #1 answer, but of course everyone always wants to hear something they can do to better themselves. You can't really "make" yourself feel confident, you just have to be it because if you push it it'll feel even worse. It's probably just because you haven't really gotten to know them that much. So just keep hanging out with them, & eventually you'll be fitting in no time. Oh and also, when you do hang out with them and your other friends, forget their there & just be crazy & have fun and don't let anyone tell you to do so otherwise (:

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ook so my friend is 16 years old and she had sex for the first time when she was like 15 and shes never used a condom. im scared that shell get pregnant but she just wont listen to me! also one of the guys she did it with is friends with my brother and my brother is really protective of me he found out that she had sex with him and hes threatening to tell my mom if i dont stop being friends with her but shes been my best friend for so long and i dont want to just stop hanging out with her! and i know that if my mom found out she would make me stop talking to her. i dont want to be like "stop having sex or we cant be friends!" because thats her desicion if she wants to do it and i cant stop her from having fun and living her life so what should i do?

You're right. You can't tell her what to do or else you'll stop being her friend. You could tell your brother that just because your friend is "sleeping" around doesn't mean it has to do anything with you because you're not HER. If he still insists on you not being friends with her, try talking to your mom FIRST, & just explain to her that you're not going to follow your friend's choices and that you know your boundaries and you intent to keep them. Hope it all works out.

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ok so i have a friend who lives in california
and i live in illinois
we both have verizon and unlimited texting
if i text her will my parents know when they get the bill that im texting someone out of state
or like will it cost more cause its someone from a different state or is it the same?

No you're parents won't know who you have been texting. I have a cousin who lives in Oregon, & I live in Missouri and it doesn't cost extra. And I've also texted someone in Europe, so you'll be fine.

Plus you have unlimited so, there will defiantly be no extra charge.

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Okay, well thing is that me and this freind are such good freind and we had a clash last summer. and wasn't very good. thing is that i cna't seem tell her my feelings. she seeem to hatd when i act mad or upset and yet jelouse and i am not a jelouse person.. she dosn't understand that my feelings are still hurting. sometimes i don't know she like me anymore or still like me as good freind. i know this maybe sound jelouse but she didn't even put me her top friends list on facebook or mysapce we been close and buddies and she treat her roomate like she treated her the best in her life. i always been good friend. and yet she was brainwash about stuff people tell her and she listens. and thought she care about me and yet she don't act like it. how can i tell her with out my saying sound mad and upset? i mean my feelings are still hurt. i know i need get over it i can't i need to fix it.. so I feel better.. we both feel better talking toeacher again and everything.

Just tell how you feel. Before hand you could maybe say something like .. "well I'm not trying to sound mad or anything but there's something I really have to talk to you about." If you guys are so close, I'm sure she will understand. You probably won't get over it until you talk to her about it because if you don't, something will always bring up how you feel, so just talk to her and I'm sure things will be fine.

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ok so im goin to be a junior in highschool next year and for the past two years i have ahd this group of friends where we hang out everyday, and torwards the last couple weeks of school in sophmore year we all got in this huge figh tand the gruop started to split up. a new girl cameinto are group which i hate to admit i tis basically the reason evryone got i nthe fight because she was rude and brought out everyones flaws. now my question is, my best friend is one of the ppl that left the group, she hansg out wit hthis one girl named sam now, i dont know know where to go next year. do i go with my bestfriend which btw we are super close, but the reason she left teh group was to basically get a way from everyone, so do i go wit hher, and this new girl who i don tlike all that much, or do stay with my old group of friedns and get cought up i nall the stupid drama, or should i find just an all new group of friends.??? please help. also my bestfriends little sister is gonna be a freshmen cmoing into ur school and im pretty good friends with her also she is fun and i know some of her friends so thier is that option. im thinking about just moving around so what should i do??

Well high school is a big place. I'm sure you will find a whole lot of different friends, since you will be meeting new people in your classes and such. And why do you have to be considered in a "group?" It's just another cliche in which you will be caught up on drama. Drama is every where you look. Just stay friends with your best friend, of course, but if she has tried to get away from everyone you should to [: It will be a lot of fun trying to meet new friends, and such. Stay in touch with your best friend because who knows you might start hanging out with her and her other friends.

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i had this friend for about 3 years she was my best friend. but then we got this new girl and i really liked her and its hard being new soo i was friends with both well my other friend got jelous and stopped talking to me. and its been really hard for me to be okay with it becuase she was my best friend.and i didnt just lose her as a friend. at the end of the year my only friends were the new girl my other best friend and my boyfriend. and im okay with that just i lost ALOT of friends all at once. so i chose to be friends with the new girl and my other best friend too like you know you got your two or three main best friends. then i started gettin ignored and replaced by. the new girl would tlel me i was doing this with her then have my best friend do it with her and just ignore me. then this summer we got in trouble and my bets friend blamed it on me and the new girl so we got mad at her cuz i got in alot of trouble for something i didnt do. so then i lost another best friend. then i went on vacation before i left the new girl told me i wasnt aloud to be friends with her. like i can be but she doesnt know what she would do if we came close agian. well i juts got back to find out they are all close and replacing me agian.and ive talked to both of them about this before.im just sick of losing good friends. and being left out. is it all worth it. staying friends with both of them? or am i like the bad one in this case.

Why would you think you are the bad person in this ? You haven't done anything wrong. Obviously these girls weren't ever true to begin with. You need to talk to them, and explain how you feel. Have them all over one night and tell them how you feel, and ask them to be honest with you and have them tell you why they have been treating you this way because it truly is unfair, & pathetic. It was very nice of you to accept the new girl as one of your close friends, but maybe you payed a little more attention to her at first, & that's why your first best friend got mad. Maybe she was feeling the way you were. Maybe that's how you all feel but yet you don't really want to tell each other so you decide to basically ignore each other. Just talk it all out, & I'm sure everything will be fine [:

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ok idk where to start...
before my bestfrined had a b.f we always hung out.. we were always together on the weekend
and now that she has a b.f she dont call me when i call her or text her she dont pick up or call me back...
shes always with him and when she's not she askes to hang out... which is like once a month... and she says i never ask her to hang out but then she's always with her b.f and when i do she busy or cant hang out
idk what to do

Well haven't we all been through this one before, haha. Just talk to her about it because she probably doesn't realize that she's doing it. And yeah it might be hard to reach her, but just go to her house or something. Call her and be like we have to talk; it's important. I hope things get better (:

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i had this convo with my bestfriend and i feel like if my bf knew i said those things with my bestfriend that he would be mad... do you think that i was wrong to talk to my bestfriend like that even if it was joking. (the whole fuck thing is an inside joke with him) btw my bestfriend is a guy.

me: loserface
him: fuck you
me: fuck you better/more! HA!
him: haha
him: got me
me: of course i did
him: fuck you harder/faster
me: ugh. fuck you longer/hotter? haha
him: sounds good.
me: you know it!
him: you dont know nothing about sex.
me: maybe not.
him: haha you dont
me: is that bad?!?!?!?
him: yes
him: duh
him: these days you have to have sex 40 times before your 11
me: haha well i just broke the damn rules
him: oh goodness.
him: to the death pit for you.
me: haha well atleast im a virgin!
me: oooooo!
him: at least im not.
me: well your a bad boy.
him: sex is fun.
me: i bet.
me: and the only reason i dont before i get married is because if i do then ill be completely attached and if i was to break up with the person i did that with or they break up with me it would be bad... like heartbreaking bad... and all and it would end up being the on and off thing because were so attached to each other.... its not for moral reasons... its for....logical reasons.
him: haha yeah
me: i just dont want to be that serious with a guy right now.;
him: yeah i understabd.
him: i forgot you're only 14
me: if i was ready to be that serious with someone it wouldnt bother me to have sex before marriage. but the thing is... if your ready to be that serious with them your pretty much ready to marry them! haha.... so yeah. im sorry im only 14 :( i know i dont act it.
him: yeah you dont
me: well that cant be a bad thing
him: its not.
me: gooood
me: your the best bestfriend ever.

so my questions are:
1)is that wrong?

You're just flirting with your best friend. Now if you show no feelings toward your best friend then there's no problem. If it's just an inside joke then it's fine but if you truly mean it or have ever thought about doing it with him, I guess you can say, then maybe you have feelings toward him that could get in the way of your relationship with your boyfriend. You can say it's both wrong and not wrong. Wrong because he's a guy and you were flirting but not wrong because it's just an inside joke. I have a boyfriend but I have a lot of guy friends whom I have tons of inside jokes with.

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i have friends that go to a different school than i do and i always try to do stuff with them but it seems like they are always busy. When ever we make plans to do something it always changes and i hate it because sometimes i cancel on my other friends and then i end up sitting home all by my self. I just wish my friends would try to keep the plans we make so i can see them!! Should i tell my friends or should i just hang out with my new friends?????

Oh yeah that happens to a lot of people. Just hang out with the people you have more fun with. Even if that means not hanging out with them all the time. You can always hang out with different people different times. Or you could ask both groups of friends to hang out together. Just make plans with one group and then make some other plans with the other group another time or day. You know you don't always have to go out places on Friday nights. It's not going to do anything to you to just sometimes spend some time by yourself. You can always just ask someone to come over and you guys can hang out and maybe she can spend the night or something. That's always fun for me and my friends. Sorry it took me a lil while to answer your question, I was busy. Have fun and make sure not to ditch and use friends or else you'll lose those friends.

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ok so like i just met this girl like a month or two ago.. and now shes like one of my best friends. well i told her who i like and she told him online but i dont think he believed but then like she's always talking about how i like him and stuff.. he used to be her boyfriend and like he kissed her .. but shes going out with someone else so obviously she doesnt like him anymore. like i dont wanna stop being her friend or w.e. but i hate how she's always telling everyone.. like i dont wanna just be like "STOP!" but she just gets kinda tells everyone stuff about me and i hate it. PLEASE HELP ME.. AND ANSWER SERIOUSLY

Well the only good thing to do is to tell her how you feel, and if she acts like a stuck-up b!tch about it then she`s not worth it. She`s just trying to make you jealous and it looks like you`re letting her win. =[[ Good luck though. Sorry I couldn`t help much. =[[

♥ Alma

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my friend made out with this guy and i think we are too young for that
we are only in 6th grade, do you think that is too young?
if you do how do i tell her she is being stupid?

I don`t think it`s too young but everyone has their own opinions. If you think that you guys are too young for this stuff, then just talk to your friend. If she`s doing it just to show off - then that`s really gay and stupid. [♥] Alma

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Me and my friend Paul are practically brother and sister! We've always been tight but over the summer it seemed as if we were getting feelings for eachother that werent normal 'friendly' feelings. He invited me everywhere with him. We went to the beach to watch fireworks, i joined him for dinner, and almost every weekend we hung out at his house watching the stars and talking. i never feel uncomfortable around him and i can tell him anyhing. Were both strong christians and believe that God will lead us in the direction we need to go. But I just dont know ...
is this Love? :-\

Aww! He likes you. I think it's very cute how you guys are so close. It probably is something like love. If you both have strong feelings for each other then try maybe going out but promise each other that whatever happends nothing will change you guys and your friendship. I hope everything works out for you two. =) [♥]Alma

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ok i like this one girl, but shes going out with someone ellse. Alot of girls think i am hott soo do u think i should wait for the girl i really like or should i go for one of the girls thats hott n thinks i am hott??

Well, I think you should go out with someone you like. Rather that be the girl you are waiting for or another girl. Just go out with a girl you really like and not just anyone. Being single couldn't possibly hurt you. [♥]


Oh by the way ; you could have asked the question once and not 6 times.

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Ok, I have a friend named Sarah*. Sarah came to my house the other day and we talked and I thought everything was fine (because we wern't best friend a week ago). Then I hear the phone ringing and Sarah picks it up (which is unusual) and I must have picked it up at the same time. Well anyway it was Jamie* A bitch that I hate and is bad news. I herd her wanting Sarah to come up to her house to ride fourwheelers. So after they get off the phone. Sarah calls her mom and goes home! Well then about 15 or 30 minutes later. She isn't home and guess what I found out that she was at Jamies!!! What do I do? Confront her!?

Well that's kinda weird, if your friends answer your phone.. hmm, but I think you should talk to Sarah and ask her why she ditched you. That's really rude if she's at your house but goes to another friend's house. I think your friend Sarah is just using you for when no one else is avialable to hang out with. She seems really snobby like the girl Jamie. Hope I helped ♥//ALMA

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okay i REALLY like this guy and he likes me tu and were goin out and everthing but i dont know if i should fall all the way in love with him cuz like we went out once before and he broke up with me for another girl and i almost wouldnt even go out with him anymore cuz he made me cry soooo much! he gave me his braclet and i cut it up and threw it on the ground and ran away from him but now hes been soo sweet and i fell in love with him and all that again but now im afraid to yew know REALLY lOVe hIM! do yew think i should trust him again after all this? o0o and ps i love yew soooo much! i will I M yew after yew give me the uhm.. *advice!* okay mwahz talk to yew later!

aww thats so sweet! i think i know who this is ! but i think you should maybe give him another chance but dont get so attached yet.. you never know what will happened .. if i were you i would just give it some time and think about everything.. he may not be the best guy for you . every guy will do whatever he can for his gf but after that hes back to being HIMSELF = a jackass with no brains .. just think about it && dont get attached jUST YET! hope i helped ♥//ALMA

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I have a lot of friends but there's one problem with a lot of them: they think I'm gay. I used to not know why they thought that, but once I looked at what I like and stuff, I would probably think I was gay, too. Even with people I just meet, they ask, "Are you gay?" and I say no but sometimes they don't believe me. Let's say my name is Mike. Well one of my friends calls me Queer Mike. Everyone knows that he's just having fun but it hurts a lot. I told him that I'm not gay but he didn't stop calling me that. Everyone thinks I'm gay but I'm not! What should I do?

0ne thing you can do to prove that you arent gay is to get a girlfriend and really get along with her like make out with her in public and stuff! That way it'll show everyone your not gay// oh and maybe your friends think your gay because of something you do and//or how you act .. good luck tho ♥//ALMA

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what is [[SP]] ? like when u use it in a sentence and put that wat does it mean??

[[sp]] means its a spelling error i already answered this ♥//ALMA

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I have a friend who says I am her "best friend". Well, lately she hasn't been inviting me places. Like, she is always with other people. I have caught on that everytime she invites me out her other friends are busy. Do you think I am her second choice or maybe I am just overreacting? I have talked to her about it but she makes excuses.

SHES JUST USING YO0 F0R WHEN HER 0THER FRIENDS CANT D0 ANYTHING ! IF I WERE YO0 ID JUST DITCH HER! I MEAN WHY W0ULD YO0 WANT A FRIEND WH0 0NLY WANTS T0 BE FRIENDS WHEN SHE NEEDS YO0 ? I BET YO0 CAN FIND BETTER FRIENDS! ♥//ALMA

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There's this guy named Justin. He is on my sport team. I see him every Monday and Wednesday. I really like him, but i'm not sure if he likes me..
How can you tell if a guy who is really shy, likes you?
I'll rate!

WELL USUALLY IF A GUY IS SHY THE WAY HE WILL TALK T0 A GIRL IS WHEN THERES N0 0NE AR0UND! HE WILL JUST C0ME UP T0 YO0 AND ASK YO0 MAYBE 0UT ! BUT SINCE HES S0 SHY WHY D0NT YO0 TRY TALKING T0 HIM GET T0 KN0W HIM M0RE ASK HIM 0VER F0R A M0VIE AND P0PC0RN !AND YO0 GUYS WILL DEFINTLY B0UND! HEHE H0PE I HELPED ♥//ALMA

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