cybering is like talking dirty online. basically youre imagining and typing how you are going to have sex or be intimate with someone.

ex:
girl: i'm kissing your neck real slow
boy: i'm undoing your skirt now
etc.

it just goes on and on. its strictly up to you, i dont really like it so i don't do it but some people really enjoy it so yeah.

really, the best way to deal with relationships is honesty. it's really hard but it's true. so maybe he's not returning your calls or e-mails because he's a bit lost himself or like the columnist answered before he, there is that chance that he has moved on in that time frame between together and not even speaking.

so i suggest you be straightforward. next time you SEE him bring it up. tell him you're sorry about how things ended and that with this new found information it's gotten you thinking about how great it use to be. and just see what happens from there.

dont even bother with this guy. if he liked you enough, he wouldn't have hurt you by making out with 7th graders [and i really hope he's not any older than a sophomore] and making out with this other girl. it doesn't matter if hes been waiting to see her for 10 years, he startd something with you and he can't just leave that when he leaves the state.

my freshman year i wasted alot of time with this one guy that said he really liked me [and granted maybe he did] but he would always be doing stuff with other girls. so maybe our situations arent entirely the same, but one thing that i had to end up learning was that it didn't matter if he liked me, he didn't like me enough to not hurt me. i kept clinging on to the thought of us because i thought that yeah he liked me, so i can change him. but it's not like that. the truth is that he doesn't care enough to keep what you two have, sacred. and no girl deserves that.

the thing with shy girls [shy people in general]is that theyll do something un expected when they feel something else. take notice of things, like if she ever blushes when you say something to her, if she's ever fighting a smile when you say something. look for things that seem out of place or not usual and that'll tell you if she likes you or not.

usually hooked up means more of a one night stand sort of thing. like no real relationship, just one night of 'fun and passion'.

going out is more of the relationship line. as in youre my boyfriend, i'm yours blah blah blah.

it's not really up to me to tell you which is better-- but i can give you my opinion.

i am in love with love. i truly am. no matter how many times i get hurt i'm always still out there ready for the next guy because i love that feeling you get when you talk to someone for hours and really connect and i love those butterfly feelings and all that junk. so i'd much rather have a relatiosnhip than a 'friends with benefits' or 'casualty.' but it's strictly up to you which ever you prefer.

don't freak out too much. if this guy is as great as you make him out to be then he'll be loyal. the last thing you want to do is smother him. if you smother him with too much love or questions then he'll start feeling trapped (which could start doubts in him). tell him that you do trust him and that you care about him alot. keep things as casual as they've always been. don't bring up too many questions about these new girls in his class. let him bring it up if he wants. remind yourself that YOU ARE A GREAT CATCH and that he doesn't control your life. if you don't have self confidence in yourself, then you can't expect your sweetheart to, right?

saying IF he cheats on you, it's not the end of the world. life will go on and you will find so many other great guys. if he does cheat, dont let it slide. break up with him now before it gets too hard and you become too much of a pushover for stupid things HE does. because it doesn't matter if he does like you, he didn't like and care about you enough to not hurt you.

keep me updated =]

if you're trying to steer away from anything sexual.. then do something that'll remind him of how great you are. like go back to your first date site or plan a late night picnic. just do something that is memorable to the both of you. for a 2 month with one of my ex's i took him to the spot where we first kissed and told him how things havent changed between us from the first moment we went out to now. also, you can bring a little wooden box or something and put a hershey's kiss in the box everytime you miss him. then when you come back you can give it to him and be like, "i put a kiss in there everytime i wanted to kiss you." get creative, i know you can come up with a billion things

yikes, that's a tough one. try sitting down with your mom and telling her that though you understand she's looking out for you and just wants you to be safe, you'd reallllly appreciate it if you could start casually dating, instead of only being able to date someone when they're about to leave. it's sort of a longshot but you just gotta keep trying and keep up their trust and faith. tell her that she knows you're a good kid and wouldn't ever want to do anything to hurt the trust you two have.

this was sort of hard for me to answer since my parents don't know i get involved with guys yet lol. but i hope i helped atleast a little bit. goodluck!

everyone feels like that atlaest once in their life. you're not alone. i was into a guy for 4 years, i didnt like him as much as you but i know a little of what you're going through.

you do have a purpose and a life. you had a life before he was in it. it does get easier with time. your feelings will eventually fade (though it may not seem like it now) but people like that, they'll always have a place in your heart. but over time your body and mind starts building defences and figuring out ways of getting around him. it's just natural. and it just takes a crapload of time. i know that many people have probably told you all of this over and over but it's the truth.

if you ever feel like you're about to break just IM me and we can totally talk it out. i'm like always online (now THAT'S lacking a life =P)

in my own world, i don't like dating guys when i know that i still have feelings for someone else or an ex. it's really hard, but if i were you i'd break up with him and tell him that it's because you still have unresolved issues and feelings about your ex, not because you and him (your new boy) aren't great together or anything. let him down easy and tell him that you still like him but it's not really fair to him and you don't want to make him a rebound guy when he deserves alot better. tell him it's up to him whether or not he wants to wait things out and ask you out again when you are over your ex. re-assure him that you'll understand if he moves on. it really sucks but it gets easier after a while.

if you break up with him now then you may regret it later. communication is the key to any relationship. tell him how you feel. be nice about it. don't be like, "hey dude. you're smothering me and it's annoying." tell him that though you appreciate all the sweet and nice and romantic things he does, it's going too fast. explain to him what too fast means. (some guys take things very wrong, and end up doing something stupid). tell him that you'd like some space, but you still want to be with him because you think this could go somewhere great and mean something deep to the both of you. also add in that you'd like to get to know him better too.

i think he does like you but for the wrong reasons. if he said, "i can spoil you" in a joking tone then yeah, it's just harmless flirting. but if he was acutually being serious, then step away from the child rapist. seriously-- this guy's moves are old and rusty and he thinks it'll be easier to to get some action since you're 13. i might be wrong, but from what you've told me and a whole year's experience of liiking 17 year old guys, i'd say he's trying to get to know you on a different level, if you catch my drift.

there are some things you can't take back. so just 100% make sure that you really have lost interest in your boyfriend. after a while you could be just tired of him but the second you break up with him you may realize that you missed something bigger than that. after figuring that out, tell him that things just aren't the same anymore and they're not right with you. tell him that you're not really that happy in this relationship and that you hope he understands. wait it out for a while (2+ weeks) and then start moving on to this new guy trying to get his attention. start up a conversation with him, if you know friends of his, maybe they can help you.

my friend was just talking about how she went parasailing when she was in the Keys. but then again, since he'll be stationed there i doubt he'll be able to get out much. just try some romantic dinners and sweet things that you two know about. like live out a private joke or uhh, fantasy? but really, if he's as crazy about you as you are to him, i'm sure that just being able to actually touch you and see you and etc in person will be good enough to last him a whole year

he could possibly be testing your jealousy, or he's just a straightup jerk. confront him and be like i'm into you and i'm ready right now so what's the deal? if he avoids it or tries to change the subject or anything like that, forget him. partially the reason you can't get over him is because you sort of need the closure. you've got questions that need to be answered so its sort of keeping you hooked on him. it's okay, evnetually your mind comepenates and makes answers for you. even if he's testing your jealousy, that still doesn't make him a cool guy. he knows that he's got you on the ropes, and he's obviously taking advantage of it. don't let him do that! you know you're better than that

i was in something similar. though it didn't last as long and we never actually went out and he never hit me, i can still relate, i promise!

first things first, this guy is an ass. dump him right now. (i know, it's hard to do).

secondly, you need to know WHY you dumped him. he is a pompous loser and he's not going to stop lying and you shouldn't have to take his crap. you have to know when to draw the line, and knowing that someone else gave him a blowjob is a pretty nice place to start.

third, do not ever think that you deserved any of this. because frankly, some guys are just scum. (and vice versa for girls, i'll admit it, some of us can be real ...cunts)

and lastly: it's going to be so hard at first but it does get easier to step away from this horrible relationship. it doesn't matter if he actually does love you or not. the thing is: he STILL hurt you, over and over. he may care for you but that doesn't change the fact that he doesn't care about you enough to stop hurting you physically and apparently mentally.

last year i fell for this guy and everyday we'd hang out in the morning and he'd hold my hand and tell me so sweet things but frankly, he was telling every other girl that too. i really should have stopped liking him when he kissed other girls and told them that me and him were through. so yeah, i can sort of relate. maybe not as good as someone else but i know what it's like to keep taking back someone who really doesn't deserve the chances. i'm sure you are a great catch and someone out there will see that and never dream of hurting you like he does.

dont' do anything dumb or do something "reboundish" 5 years is pretty big though. just keep in mind that this WILL pass and you WILL eventually get over him. partially, i believe that you just like him because you want to try to get him (even though you know there's no chance of it). it's okay, that's human nature lol. i want what i can't have all the time. anyways! it's totally natural and normal. sometimes i just talk to my friends about it, i know they get tired of it after a while but hey, that's why they're friends. try reading or taking up a hobby. sometimes i just get out how i feel over a guy by expressing it by making pictures on my computer or writing stuff out on online- journals.

maybe guys find you intimidating, or too shy? it seems like you've got alot going for yourself and you know alot, so maybe they find it intimidating... don't worry, just be yourself and you'll find guys eventually. i know it's the cheeziest thing to say but as you get older, it's going to be more and more important for you to just be yourself; especially to attract guys

it's scary but you have to tell him that you honetsly want to get to know him better, and it's not some line you're feeding him to get him off your back. tell him that you really are interested and you'd understand if he wants to move on. (harsh to say but yeah). tell him that you do like him alot and you do and want a future with him but you just need a little more time. if he's really that into you then he'll stick around

you already said that you've been open with her, so open her up to your feelings. tell her how you feel, don't be so strong though. don't be like, "i like you sooo much and i want to be with you so badly." that might scare her off (even more so since she hasn't actually dated yet). tell her that you think she's a great person and it'd be nice if there was a near future date with her..then ask her if she feels the same. re-assure her that it's totally fine if the feeling isn't given back, and that she's a worthwhile girl to wait for.

since she's shy it might be a good idea to make the date seem more like a hangout. I don't know her personality nor personally so i couldn't tell you. but either go with simple and nice, or huge and memorable. hope i helped

this site has been down for a while but i'm starting it up again. i've been really busy with school work and other activities but now you can ask me questions again.


anyways about myself, i've gone through alot in my life and it's all made me stronger so i can relate to nearly any situation. i really love people. when i get older i do plan on doing something in this sort of field, maybe psychiatry. i'm currently a junior in highschool and i devote all of my time to either my friends, theatre, or school. yeah i'm sort of a nerd. if i can't get on here to reply to your questions and its urgent then you can always feel free to IM me on AIM and i'll try to help you on there. i'm basically always on.

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