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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!
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Just a follow up to the question I asked on beds. I have the actual demesions of the room. 13.97ft X10ft width. My mom said to leave the bed to her. I have 2 double windows one facing one street and the other is front of house on a different street.
Aside from a bed I have a leather recliner and don't know having not been in the house yet about a desk. I also have a display case for trophies going in. My big concern is the walls. I am a movie buff and have 7 27X40 posters in frames plus 5 11X17 in frames and 3 27X40 I wanted up that haven't been in current room. This is not counting 3-4 others I can't display due to space here.
I suck at math and was wondering based on the dimensions if you think I can pull all of this off. I'm not sure how the room curves and have only seen photos of the room until keys next month and the two walls with windows on it unfortunately. Anything really is a guess on my part of what I have to work with. The photo makes it look like a cozy space.
The other thing is that there's a spare room that only will be used for storage of my film collection. I don't know but maybe I can convince someone to put any of the remaining posters in there but for now if you have any guess on how much space I'm looking at all around and for walls that would be cool. No problem if not.
Hon, its going to be hard to know where everything will fit. If you need electrcity for desk for a computer and if display cases come with lights that need an outlet, you may find you have to give spots like that priority and only then will you really know what space is left. The windows also cut into the ability to have wall space to put up frames posters. If there is a door for closet, you might try seeing if you can hang one on closet door and the other on door that is entrance to the room, on the inside. If door mirrors can be hung, then a framed poster should work and that would take care of two. I really can't help with just dimensions of the room and where all will fit. Sorry, but it comes down to you having to sort things out. I can only give ideas.
My friend arranged a beach party this weekend. I want to look the best as usual. I have already ordered a short western dress for the party. My aunt says that the Synthetic Lace Wigs will look the best with this dress that I found at http://www.ehairwig.com/index.php/lace-wig/synthetic-lace-wig.html . Can you please suggest whether these wigs will go with my western dress or not?
I would say that one question is whether this beach party includes gettingn into the water. I have no experience in wearing wigs. But my Mom did and I don't recall her ever going swimming in it. You need to check if saltwater, or heck, even chlorinated pool water will hurt the wig or ruin it.
Next, how authentic do you want to look for a Western themed outfit or party? A lot of those wigs are modern styles with the heavy braided, kinked, dread locks look. If you don't care about being totally authentic to a Western look from the past , then any style should be ok. Keep in mind the shape of your face and choose a style that doesn't make the shape of face exaggerated. If you have a long narrow face, you'd want to avoid a long straighter hair style that just makes your face look longer and narrower. If a round or heart shaped face, you might want to avoid the shorter curly cuts as it might just make your face look plump.
Is there any possibility to get pregnancy while fucking through back hole means excretory hole
The anal cavity and the vagina do not have any connections inside you. So any semen that goes in back will not make you pregnant.
However, depending on how you are positioned, a good amount of his cum can leak back out of there just as it can from vagina. Once it has leaked back out, if it instantly runs toward your pussy lips if they are really wet, the sperm may be able to travel into the vagina. This is a very slight chance.
I believe the best practice is to use the bathroom right after and strain to see if anything leaks out. Then wipe only in back not dragging it forward to vagina. Also, an extra tip for after sex in vagina, it is a good idea to try to pee to clear out any possible germs that may have gotten inside your vagina.
Hello, just wondering, why does he say, 'i like talking to you?' we do chat when we see each other as he's a mate. He also says you're my friend in a reassuring tone at least twice when we're having a chat and I say yeah yeah, I know that. Is he after something or is it just a mate thing? I've started to fancy him a little so could I please get a straight answer? Thanks.
I like talking to you-- is a very straightforward phrase. There can not be any hidden meaning there.
Lets switch roles here and you are telling someone that you like talking to them. Think hard now....what exactly would it be that makes you like talking with someone? I am sure you can figure it out. But just to help, I will list a couple things.
They don't speak in a monotone voice
You don't have to drag responses out of them
and conversation flows easily.
They can speak on a big variety of topics so its not restricted to just work, school stuff or girly stuff or male interests.
The person doesn't hog the convo and allows you to talk also.
The person is a good story teller.
They have a great sense of humor which makes them interesting to listen to with lots to make you laugh.
I could probably go on but those are common reasons.
So it is very likely that he finds many of these if not all, to be true of you.
If your girlfriends never said "I like talking to you" its because they are female talking to a female and females tend to talk about certain subjects. Its highly unlikely they'd be conversing about working on cars or restoring them for example. Lots of males may find females lacking in being able to talk about a variety of things. Or they might have to suffer hearing about the latest cute outfit, the nail design you want to try on your nails, or the latest chick flick you enjoyed. They won't require you to know know alot about some of their favorite topics like skateboarding and skate parks if you aren't into it. But it is a plus if you are truly wanting them to share what it is like for them, giving attention and making comments that show you are really listening.
Now about saying he's your friend, thats good cus the other option would be 'your enemy' or a guy who can't stand you or hates you. Females tend to look for double meanings or hidden meaning in everything a guy says. Unless he's gay and happens to have this female attribute of how females hold conversation and decipher convo's, males don't try to speak with double or hidden meanings. Males can enjoy the friendship of a female without being in love. Some may never fall in love. However being good friends is the best place to start and creates a good foundation for two people who may slowly move from friendship to romance and love.
As to why he keeps repeating that you are his friend, it could be that your response makes him feel you don't believe him, therefore he keeps trying to reassure you of this. He might be waiting for something more than "Yeah, yeah".
If your comment is given with an indifferent sounding voice, he might also wonder if you are just tolerating him and don't really care to have him as a friend. Either you are glad that he is your friend or not. If you are glad, tell him so. Maybe compliment him on some things that you appreciate about his friendship. Everyone wants to be liked and appreciated, you too. So now again, switch roles and think if you told a guy that he is your friend and he just grunts in rsponse, or only smiles a weak smile or says, Uh huh, you wouldn't think he was taking it that seriously and that maybe he really doesnt care one way or the other. Realize that females will think and reason things out way differently than males. They are pretty simple whereas females tend to be complicated in thinking and reasoning. Do not ever try to use what you know as a female to try to understand a male or analyze him. The best way to learn exactly what he means is to ask for clarification. I get lots of gals writing asking what their guy meant and I always tell them, its not as complicated as you may think. Just ask him. Hope this helps you dear.
I forgot to drink my Trigestrel pills yesterday
So I don't know wherever to drink 2 pills
Today or I should only drink 1?
When you forget to take a birth control pill, you are not supposed to double it. YOu can't do that with any medicines prescribed. It doesn't catch you up and it could be harmful.
Just take one. Then to not forget in the future, set an alarm on your cell or whatever device you carry with you to remind you to take your pill. If you tend to take it at home early mornings or in evening you can keep the pills at home. If you take it during the day when you may be gone, then take it with you in your purse.
I have a huge problem with oversleeping and crawling into bed for naps during the day only to still be asleep long past the intended time. This is an issue because I'm a incredibly busy person. I work full time, I'm taking 18 college credits (US), I'm the VP of a big organization on campus, and I'm also trying to get back into the dating world.
Lately though all I want to do is sleep and its gotten to the point I missed two classes and a meeting last week because I slept right through my alarm. My boss also called me the other day about how I'm not working as many hours and he needs me to work more or he's going to have to find somebody else to replace me who can.
I'm just so exhausted all the time and it's majorly stressing me out. I want to have a normal schedule, but what usually happens is I wake up sometime between the hours of 10am and 12pm, go to classes until around 4pm, go back to sleep until 7pm, wake up, eat, shower, do various other tasks, then either work (I work from home) or do homework until 2 or 3am because I slept so late and then the cycle repeats.
If I try to go to sleep earlier and wake up in the morning to do homework or work, it never gets done. I've tried multiple times. I wind up just hitting snooze endlessly until I absolutely have to get up and then I don't get my work done.
I don't even think about it when the alarm goes off, I immediately hit snooze and go back to sleep. I don't even have time to tell myself not to before I'm asleep again.
On the weekends it's even worse. I can easily sleep until 3pm, be up for a few hours, go back to sleep around 6 or 7, wake up at 10, do stuff until 3, and repeat.
I also have a hard time doing things because I wind up in such a fog after napping, but I can't just tell myself not to nap, When I get tired, I'm asleep ten minutes later. I can't force myself awake.
I have tried caffeine through coffee, other drinks, and even caffeinated vitamins and pills. They don't do anything except give me an upset stomach.
Our body will tell us if it is lacking something by the symptoms we get, usually something more along the line of sickness or illness. Cars won't run well or at all without fuel and all the oils and fluids it needs. Same for our bodies. I can't say what your body is missing. You could see a Dr. but regular Drs don't run lots of tests to see what your body is missing. Alternative health Drs might. Drs only treat the symptom, but not the underlying issues creating your problem. So you need to do some sleuth work yourself.
If this wasn't a problem before, try to look back to a time maybe 6 months before before this sleeping problem occurred. If what you were doing then was vastly different, meaning no 8 hr work and no school, then perhaps your body can't handle the stress of doing all that.
Perhaps you are also too busy to eat regular healthy meals. I mention looking back about 6 months because the body can still run a while without key things it needs to function well so for a while at the beginning of your hectic schedule, the sleep problem may not have been there yet. But your body was slowing losing ground and giving in to the conditions that happen when it is lacking whatever it is needing and missing.
If you figure out what changed, you may have to make adjustments to your schedule or to what you have been getting for nutrition.
I am a 27 year old female and this party Tuesday on Valentine's Dayi was sleep I woke up with my mom yelling at me about leaving the porch light on well the problem with her thinking I left the porch light on is that I was in my room asleep the whole time. I told her that and she called me a liar. Then she accused me of taking my nephew's pain medicine.I have never stolen anything from my mom in my life . I have 2 bottles of the same pain medicine that were prescribed by my dentist so why would I need to steal his. I get a disability check when I called the cops they took me to my aunt's and they suggested that I need to change my payee.I am scared my mom will get mad if I do that. Should I change my payee?
I used to be a caregiver for the mentally challenged. I am familiar with this situation. If it is as adviceman said, and you require a guardian, then the most likely one you are first given is a parent if they are living and and or if this disability occurred while you were a minor.
My of my clients was an adult and wanted to change who his guardian was. As I recall, it wasn't for any problems with the guardian, he just preferred the personality and got along better with a relative he wanted who was willing to do it. Then its an easy matter of going thru the proper channels to have it made legal. YOu'd have to ask your appointed social worker how to go about that. If you have their name but don't know how to get a hold of them, contact the local DSHS (Dept. of Social and Health Services and ask them for help in getting in contact with your social worker, privately without MOm knowing yet so she can't interfere. You need some one whom you trust to handle your money, not someone who comes unhinged so easily. YOu need to be rid of stress like that cus the disabled people I know of had automatically enough stress in their lives just finding alternative ways to do the same or accomplish all the things those without disabilities do, you just have different ways to do the same. That is stress enough without adding your Mom into your worries and concerns. If I were you, I would definitely change payee.
I buy clothes, like recently I bought an outfit and it wont even give me the option to wear it or even show up. I tried to sign out and sign back in and even restart my computer. it took my money or coins and I am not sure how to fix this.
It sounds like you are talking about an avatar you bought clothes for, not yourself as you mention the option to wear it. And clothes for a human wouldn't be talked about as having option to wear right after purchase as it needs to be shipped if purchased via computer.
So if you are talking about a venue such as IMVU or Second Life or something like that, vendors in such games usually have a way for you to reach them in case there is any issue not receiving a purchased object in your in box. Or if it was recieved but you find you can not open it, it may either be a different than the usual way of opening a purchase. I've played 2nd life some and it has happened to me at some point. I've written to the creator of the item and asked them for help or let them know I didn't receive it. There should be some way to track proof of your purchase. Second life puts these notices in your email.
If I have misunderstood, you will need to be more clear with what the situation is so we can help.
I am moving soon and rather clueless about furniture in this case bed options. My parents always handled mattress and box spring purchases. In my soon to be former bedroom it's a tight space where the double bed takes up a considerable chunk of the room. In my new home it's different.
I cannot recall the length/width of new room exactly but I know 13ft is accurate but not X width. I don't like the traditional bed and box-spring and want a sleep option that doesn't take up a lot of space not thrilled with a queen or single either. I have slept on pull out couches before and they kill my back. I want to have a lot of room to walk in and put a leather chair and desk too. Even with foam a pull out sofa bed screwed up my back. Any ideas of what I can buy that is different and fits my room well?
The actual room itself will also have a trophy case and several 27X40 pieces of framed artwork. A comfortable bed is my main concern that doesn't dwarf everything in the room. The only other big furniture obstacle if you can call it that is a long chest of drawers my big screen TV and satellite receivers, Blu-ray player etc sits on. Other than that I hope to have room to make it cozy because my current room feels like a sardine can and I don't want it to in the next house. Any ideas would be great on the bed of course and getting maximum out of any space. Thanks! I know you aren't furniture experts but opinions can spark ideas that work.
My husband and I sleep on a platform bed. This would be a wood construction, box like and has drawers for storage just like a chest of drawers/dresser. On top of the wood plat form, you place the mattress. There is no need for boxsprings or the frame that supports them. This utilizes the under the bed storage space and would look nice to fit in with all the other things in the room. These platform bed frames come in all bed sizes. However, I believe they are sold without mattress and you need to purchase that separately.
Another hint for knowing ahead of time where all furniture will go or even fit is to use graph paper.
I did this once when I just bought a house. I measured the length of every wall and half wall and where doorways occurred along a wall. I also measured all my furniture. How wide and how deep from front to back is important as well. Height is not needed. Then you decide what each little square on the graph paper will represent in inches. If I remember, I had each square represent 2 inches. That way I could cut one in half to represent i inch. Using the furniture measurements, I then marked off the inches of width and depth of each piece using the squares on the graph paper with pencil and then cut them out and labeled them which furniture it was. Then I had to tape from back side a couple of pages together to be big enough to represent the room. YOu have to make sure it all lines up perfectly with other sheets, exactly on the line.
Once you've marked where the walls are you are ready to move your cut out representations of your furniture to see where they fit best if they fit at all. This is much easier than moving and removing the actual pieces of furniture around to get it all to fit. Yes, measure your chair for desk too as it will be sitting out in walk space.
Hope this gives you some inspiration.
Hi, why don't a friend want to chat about his love life? We've been friends for a few months and we're teasing and kidding loads. We're pretty open and honest to each other. While he asks about my love life very little I just answer him but when I do the same, he just likes to change the topic he says with smile. Why does he just gives me a little information about his love life? Any reason behind? Thank you!
Some people are private people but some of those private people forget that others may feel the same way and not want to share. Its as simple as that.
Next time he asks something about your love life, do as he does, change the topic. If he comments wanting to know why you changed the subject and didn't answer, tell him you are just following his bright shining example.
If the guy were asking simply to find out if you are single, or dating but unhappy, it would be to make a move to ask you out but he hasn't done that, has he? So it is nothing for you to be concerned about.
If you find you can not drop the matter, then ask him point blank. We can not read minds here at advicenators, we only give advice. So if you want to know why he even asks such questions, then you'd have to ask him, not us dear.
I'm 13 a girl and I am 102 pounds I don't eat much and if I do eat something it's at like 3:00 in the afternoon and it's only like a banana. I fill up on water. It started when my grandparents got me a Fitbit that tracks steps and other stuff but it also has food tracking and when I first got it and was tracking the food I eat I saw how much calories was in the food so now I don't eat meals I feel like I'm fat but my parents think I might be starting to be anorexic and every time I eat i check how many pounds I am And I go and exercise for like 3 hours. I'm starving myself please help me!!
Hon, we can't help you. But we can suggest where to get help. This is something you can't battle on your own. A great many issues and problems that people tend to have in life more often than not, starts with distorted thinking. Distorted thinking happens quite commonly to almost all humans at some point in their life hon so don't think you are weird or worthless. However the moment a distorted thought comes to a person, many are able to see it for what it is and they reject it either verbally or in side themselves by stating the opposite. For any distorted thought, way more than one positive one/outlook is needed to cancel out the distorted thought. It takes more than just your willpower to overcome what you are doing, and the solution may be CBT, cognitive behavioral therapy or some kind of therapy that a counselor or psychologist can help you in.
What is happening to you is not normal. I was 110 lb thru out high school so from 14 on. And I am a petite person with a very fine thin boned skeletal structure and I ate healthy, no skipped meals and even had sweets and snacks and I was normal for my age and at wellness Dr. checkups, I was a perfect weight, not under or over for my age and my bone structure.
Perhaps it is your bone structure that has you feeling you are fat, but you can not change the size of your bones.
Now it is a scientific fact that humans need fuel to be at their healthiest, without being fat. IN that, we are like a car. It needs gasoline to keep running or if you run out of gas, it won't function. If you forget to keep up the amount of oil needed, power steering fluid or any other kind of fluids, the car will not run properly. If a car is abused long enough without gettng the proper care, then the parts wear out faster and eventually that car will just die and not start again for anything.
The human body is amazing at being able to heal itself or become as healthy as possible, but only if we feed it the right foods for our body type and taking vitamins plus supplements for things we need that just aren't found much in food like certain amino acids and such. Now that I am older, I have noticed what not having certain supplements can do. Example: I was having memory problems and forgetting a lot of things. 4 months ago I read about a lack of a certain amino acid will cause memory problems so I bought it at a vitamin store and can say that my memory is very much improved, not back to where I'd like it yet but its a process that takes time.
Your body needs more than water and a banana to stay healthy. You won't always have youthfulness on your side. You are still growing at this age and haven't come into your full adult body yet even tho you may be maturing some due to puberty.
Exercise is a good habit to be in but that does nothing to provide your body with what it needs.
In case you don't think this is serious, i have a niece who eats but doesn't eat the healthiest foods, and lots of junk food. She is 16 and now has chronic stomach problems, lots of pain, and other issues and she ended up in emergency just 2 months ago due to the severeness of her pain. And it is all due to her body still not getting what it needs in nutrition, even though she is eating. She is so low in all the needed nutrients that eventually her body couldn't stay 100% healthy and something was bound to be affected and it was her stomach. So I highly advise you to tell your parents to what extent you are going with no food, just water and banana and ask for help. They will contact the family Dr. and your Dr. will refer you for counseling. If your family has no insurance, perhaps your parents can help work with you, get a book that deals with CBT and with their support and encouragenment, do what the book says to work on getting rid of the distorted thoughts that are causing you to act and feel and believe this way. Oh, I know it feels very real, but just because what you feel is feeling so real doesn't mean its the healthiest thing for you. I used to suffer from an extreme anxiety and was plagued by oh so many distorted thoughts as a teen. I finally did a version of CBT that was suggested to me and I was healed in a very short time and back to normal thinking with no anxieties. I know yours is not an anxiety but end result is something goes wrong for you because like myself, what you are going through has the same root problem as mine did, distorted thoughts.
This all starts with admitting you have a problem and wanting to be healthy and normal again and the final step is reaching out to ask for help. You make a start in the right direction, asking for help but asking here will not help you, I can only encourage you to get professional help.
so basically friend A told me that friend B told her that I talked shit behind her, which I didn't, and it's actually B that talked shit about A and I just listened.
It all started when friend A accused B because A said that friend C said something about B. B then dragged me down too and say that I talked shit about A. Now I admit that I was there when B was trash talking about A but I never did talk shit about A, i was the one who changes the topic because I dont want drama. Although A said that she still trusts me, I believe that things are still quite awkward between us, and I don't know about friend B, i mean she just dragged me down when I really trusted them BOTH and I just didn't know she would say something like that.
Please tell me what I should do with A and B x
I think that this would all be easier if I knew what you consider a true "friend" to be. If A, B and C are truly friends, not just mere acquaintances or people that you just happen to know but don't consider friends, then as a true friend, none of these girls would talk trash about a mutual friend behind their backs. That's bad enough to dump the friendship. But to put the blame on you when you are innocent is even worse. Sounds more like the workings of an enemy than a friend.
You can't blame A for not knowing what to think even though she says she trusts you. I think she may know from history that you are not that kind of person and is trusting you alone on that. But then who is to say what scenerio's come up in her mind wondering if there might be a certain situation/circumstance which would cause you to do this for the first time and that may be why things are awkward between you.
If this is very unusual behavior for B, or anyone else for that matter, and its the first time they have ever done something crappy like this to you and A, then I would personally let the person know that I will not tolerate any more of this kind of crap in the future. If not her usual way of being, ask her whats going on in her personal life, what is stressing her. People tend to dump on the ones they are closest to when under great stress. If there is no reason, no turmoil in her life and this is just how she is, then its time to stop associating with her.
If she seems to be sorry, then to give her another chance, tell her she needs to confess to A and ask her forgiveness for both talking badly behind her back and making up the lie that you are the one who did it. If she is unwilling to do so, then tell her that this friendship is over and tell her to keep away from you. You can not tell her who else she needs to stay away from,like A or anyone else. That is up to A whether she also wants to dump B as a friend and tell her to stay away. If so, you need to make it clear to A that you are no longer associating with B and if she still wants to, then she can only see you when its just her and you doing something together and she can see B on her own without you around.
If A is smart, she will realize that by your disassociating with B, that it must be for a reason so it must be true that she is the one at fault, especially if she knows that you are not usually like that.
Hope this helps.
who should i choose the one who gave me the first kiss but is a jerk and i dont love him or the one that i love he is the most handsome and perfect guy i have ever seen?
OMG. do you realize how what you typed came across to me? It sounds like you do not have a clue whether you should choose a man who treats you badly or the one who treats you good.
Do you for some reason just feel like you deserve to be treated like dirt? I highly doubt that.
Let me guess....the issue is not how the guy will treat you but with which one you feel more sexual fire and passion, even if you're only at the kissing stage. I'd venture to say that the bad boy is the one where you feel this chemistry and the handsome/perfect guy is perfect except for not having the same effect on you, you don't feel much if any passion with him. If I am correct, then my answer would be to not choose either one.
Why? The first is a jerk of course, and the second one and you, do not have the right chemistry together and that is something that mankind has not yet found a way to change.
Handsome is good, a gentleman who treats you well is good but imagine a passion less life tied to a man who is only a wonderful man but theres no passion and connection between you both. It has to be two way and the guy loving you but you not feeling anything in return will not work.
k
If I guessed wrong on all of this, then please restate your question in different words dear.
Hello, what's my guy mate trying to say? am I reading or thinking too much? Very recently, he's started to call me sweetheart, sweetie pie and darling in our months friendship. He mentions and says, 'you're my friend' at least twice when we meet up and having a chat. Now I'm aware that it could be normal but I so want to know the view from u all. I do fancy him though. Thanks for the answers. Cheers!
For a guy to address a female that way means one of two things.....either he really likes you and wants a romantic relationship, not just friends, OR.......He is the type of male who uses these words when speaking to ALL females and it doesn't mean he is into them, it is just his way of speaking due to his personality. If you think such a thing doesn't exist, my husband is one of those and a manager at the fast food place I work is another, addressing each one of us as Sugar or Sweetie and he's a wonderful manager and as I am older and have had a life of experience in being able to tell if a man is hitting on me or not, in his case, it is not. I will admit that there are not many guys who will talk this way for fear of being misunderstood or upsetting a gal. I tend to think a male who does this is a gentle, sweet natured person and lets say, a man who is comfortable in his own skin. I do not know which of these your male friend may be. So the best thing you can do since he hasn't been like this all the time in the past and only recently, is to ask him why he has changed how he addresses you. If you don't get a straight answer from him, then if it were me, I'd ask if using these kinds of words is his way of trying to let me know that he doesn't want to be "just friends" anymore but move on to a romantic, intimate relationship. If he says yes, then go for it, but don't assume that he has decided you're the one for him for the rest of his life. It takes more than sweet words to prove one is in love with someone. IT takes action and you will know it by the type of actions he takes and I am not talking about just buying you gifts, but is he proud to be seen with you. Does he want to introduce you to friends and family? Does he do special errands for you that you could have done yourself? Is he acting supportive of your interests and complimenting you, taking a real interest in what is important to you to mention a few. If you'd rather not ask, then just enjoy what you have without knowing if it means anything. Or you could have some fun and if you've never addressed him that way before, then try it using whatever sounds good to you in commenting to a male, like Hi Honey, You bet Sugar, Whatcha doing Boyfriend, etc. Throw a lot of it at him to see how he reacts. He may take this as encouragement if he's into you and he will naturally ease into a relationship of something more without actually having to ask you to be his girlfriend or clarify it for you. If you want clarification, then ask what he means by it since he changed how he is lately and don't go for any smoke screen answers but keep rephrasing your question until you get a straight answer. Good luck.
I forgot my gym clothes today so I had to wear my itchy sweater. I'm not in the best shape so I get really red while exercising. I used to cut but I have gotten over that, but you can still see very faint marks from where I used to cut. When my skin turns red you can clearly see all of then running right down my arm. I asked my teacher to let me go run some water over my arms since the sweat mixed with the itchy sweater caused a bit of burning, and she wanted to see my arms to make sure I wasn't getting a rash. I showed her and she allowed me to go. I'm really worried that she saw the scars and might call my parents, my parents never learned about my cutting. What do I do? I'm really freaking out!
There's no reason to freak out over something in the past. If you can just adjust your own thinking on this issue, you will feel calm. As your thoughts run, whether peaceful or scared or angry, so will your emotions and actions go.
So the key is what you think. I do not know if teachers report cut scars to parents. I do know they look for signs that a parent is abusing a child, like bruises all over their body and then they contact CPS, child protective services, not the parents. CPS would show up unannounced at your parents door.
Who you were in the past does not define who you are today. So if you are no longer cutting and have no desire to that you are battling with and there are no anxieties or depression, then you have nothing to worry about.
Walking around for the rest of your life covering your arms and trying to hide this from the parents is stressful in itself There is always some stress to an individual who lies or hides something in order to keep something secret. To be free of that stress, it is better to come out in the open. It would involve seeking out the one parent who is more calm and open-minded and telling them and they can pass it on to the other parent. If you choose to try this, at any point that the stress of hiding it and guilt and such get to you and you just want to get the hiding over with, then here's something I would say:
I need to confess something and no matter how alarmed you may be, I want you to allow me to share everything without any interruption until I am done. I know this may be something in the recent past but I want you to keep in mind that if a person has really changed or overcome something, then their past should not define who they are currently. So the deal is, I used to cut myself. (you explain here if you did it to just experiment and do it cus friends did and you were curious or more likely if you did it cus the pain of cutting somehow canceled out your emotional pains or anxieties.) I know now that was the wrong thing to do. I am ashamed of my scars. (admitting wrong and how you feel goes a long way to proving you are growing up and changing if you can communicate this all in an adult manner.)
If you want to keep a closer watch on me or one of you check my body periodically for fresh scars, I will understand, even tho I might not like it, but I know this is a way for you both to regain trust in me. I know its your job as my parents to make sure that all I need is taken care of. So even if you wish me to see a counselor, I will go. If they can find nothing currently wrong with me, then I hope you can trust me again all the sooner."
Its a big difference from you volunteering to go thru any hoops they may have versus them first placing certain demands on you in a way that feels like punishment. It should not ever be punishment but support and encouragement to grown and change for the better.
Then you can share this next piece of information that helps to understand how quickly teens and college age people grow and change.
There are scientific tests to back this next bit up. While the body may become mature in the teens, the last thing to really mature and finish growing is the frontal lobe of the brain. So without a fully mature brain, teens are very likely to make some poor choices but can just as quickly learn form them, improve and move on.
Of course, you could share this all in your own words. When they aren't home, practice talking to a stuffed toy, holding eye contact until you feel comfortable confessing and knowing what you will say ahead of time. Don't lose your patience with the parents, just calmly allow them the time to vent their emotions whether crying, worry or anger and yelling. Don't rise to the bait and cry or yell back as you will lose ground.
Now if you are too chicken to confess now and they happen to find out from other sources, maybe not even a teacher, then consider how that looks to them. You can still share all the information I posted above that you might share with them. But it would hardly have much positive impact on them because of the fact that you were still in hiding mode and keeping this information from them which in a parents eyes will convince them stronger than your words, that you really have not changed at all and may be in danger of cutting again.
Good luck dear.
Hello all, what does it mean when a guy who I know for a month says you're my friend and we should stay in touch. Why is he saying that? We joke and I reckon he teases me loads but more like makes fun of me. Why? Please help? Cheers!
Just by the words alone, one can't tell what a person is thinking and if there's a 2nd hidden meaning to what they say. Generally, guys don't play word games. However, the words they choose to communicate by are always more clear to other males, but seem so foreign to females. So when in doubt, I always suggest rephrasing in your own words what they said to be sure.
Such as : You mean friend as in being on the same level as your male buddies, right?"
And for the 2nd part, "When you say we should stay in touch, does that mean you want to be able to contact me by phone or email, or that you want me to contact you?
If you have plenty of people to chat with and don't want another person who is strictly just a chat buddy, then let him know. I've done that. I'd say, "You know, I have a lot of people who like to just chat with me on line but hardly anyone who wants to actually get together in person to go do fun things together as just friends. So if you only want to chat on line or text, don't be surprised if I don't always seem eager to do so."
This is the guys chance to say that they'd like to contact you only to set up times to get together for a movie night, or go on a walk, or whatever. Keep in mind, girls and guys both can have friends of the opposite sex and it doesn't mean anything more.
Someone made a voodoo doll of me and they died. How do I get rid of it, if the person that made it died
I've seen this question sitting here for quite a while. No one has answered perhaps as none of us have any experience with voodoo.
I don't either. But I do know that there is intent and well wishes, blessings or the opposite in curses, and ill will. Whether a curse or voodoo doll carries any real power behind it would depend on whether the person who made it had any real power or not. Curses can last long after those who first placed them are dead, at least thats what I believe from stories like the Hope Diamond where people have died because of owning it or coming into contact with it somehow.
I would suggest praying for your angels to come protect you from any bad or evil and in your imagination, do what I do for protection, create a big bubble around you that will move with you where ever you go, and keep doing this periodically thru your days. The bubble is clear so you can see, it is invisible but believe it is made of the protecting power of God and your angels. Then take this voodoo doll and perhaps place it on the grave of the dead person, or better yet, bring a spade and bury it there. There is no right or wrong way to be rid of it, just don't leave it where anyone else can get their hands on it in case there is any real ill power to it.
It actually started when he wrote a poem on me over facebook.Before that he was my senior officer n I was his junior in office.Though he is posted in another branch of our office and stays far away from me. I knew he is married and a father of a beautiful 5year daughter.He used to communicate with me only through fb and we used to discuss about feminism and other social theories.But initially i was disgusted with him,poking his nose in every posts I update on fb.then one day he wrote a poem on a picture of mine n i started paying attention and as days passed I started talking to him more n more n i fell for him deeply eventually and he also confessed that he loves me as well.he is12years older than me still we felt this heavenly mental connection and without even knowing we became soulmates.we used to share everything to each other.though i am engaged to another guy n he is married we were not happy with our personal lives n that made spending times over phone n fb talking to each other so obvious.he asked me to meet him so many times but I used to postpone his plans to meet.but he started begging n one day we met n one thing leads to another n we ended up having sex.then again we met n had sex.but no matter how intense my love for him is still deep within i feel very guilty whenever I see his family.i asked him to stop this relationship several times but it seems he can leave everything for me now but can't live without me. I want and need him too.but i just don't want to ruin his family.i wanna stop it here n leave him.so tried talking to him abruptly but couldn't end it as causing him pain is not an option to me.what should I do?
Well, since there is no magic pill to take away heart ache, I think you are just going to have to continue on with this and let the cards fall where they may. Hopefully there is a life lesson to be learned here and you learn it. If not, you may have a future of lots of heartache you cannot hide from.
For example, a man once answered my dating profile and we went out. I had no way of knowing he was married and I didnt do anything but just meet in person at coffee shops with prospective guys. He knew from my profile that I was into honesty and okay with dating a married man as long as I can meet the wife and get her okay on it. I was talking about couples who have an open marriage. WHen he told me they no longer have sex, I told him, that if he wants me as a sex partner, then I need to be able to meet his wife. He refused saying she doesnt know what he is doing and would not go for it. So when I suggested that if he is so miserable, either he find another gal who has no problem dating a man without the okay of the wife or he get a divorce and then be free to meet any girls he wants. He told me that also is not possible as He loves his wife and doesnt want to divorce her. She was still his best friend, just not his sex partner anymore. So I told him, I would not date him but thanks for the honesty.
Wiht your guy, you may have to bring up the subject to find out where you really stand. How does he feel about his wife? Are there problems with sex and intimacy between him and his wife and don't let him tell you its none of your business. It is since he has pursued you and charmed you into this situation. You may discover that he is never willing to leave his wife but as long as you are willing to meet for sex, he'll take what he wants. sex alone does not a solid relationship make. You need someone who loves you, and can devote their whole heart to you and is your best friend. But then again, maybe what I believe that to be may differ from what you think and there may lie the problem. I cannot convince you what your morality should be. That is entirely up to you but a situation like this almost invites heart ache to come your way in some form or another eventually. So even tho you avoid heart ache by staying with him now, fate may still come bite you later.
My grandma recently had a stroke and she's very confused and speaking baby like. My aunt went up to the hospital with some forms for her to sign so she could get power of attorney. My grandma has two kids left which is my mom and my aunt. My aunt is not responsible, she steals money from my grandma, does drugs and she's been writing checks using my grandmas name while she's in the hospital. My mom is way more responsible and I have a cousin that has also been looking out for my grandmother. My aunt just wants to be in control of everything so she can spend grandmothers money and live somewhere nice. When my grandma gets out of the hospital, my aunt is forcing her to live in her house which is not suitable to live in. Can my mom and cousin take my aunt to court?
I highly advise that your mom and cousin seek legal help. I am sure that power of attorney can be taken away or given to someone else but it would have to been proven that grandma was made to sign when she was not of sound mind and also proof of aunts misuse of the position of POA.
All my life i have always felt like the second or backup option. Now that high school is over and im in university ive tried and tried to make friends but they all end up just being classmates meaning after the class is done they have their group of friends to go to. None of my high school friends bother to text me or see how im doing its always me having to start the conversation first. I even tried making friends on my schools facebook page, me and the friends i made talked all summer then when we met at school they dropped me. I basically had to try to beg them to talk to me but then i realized whenever i didnt text them first or initate to hangout with them i never heard from them so i gave up. I even tried going to my schools orientation week, long story short my parents didnt allow me to go to all of the events so the friends i made forgot who i was or deleted me off of snapchat. I tried joining a club but the club meets during a time i cant stay on campus because my parents want me home at specific time since campus isnt safe at night. I didnt think my first year would feel this lonely but it does and its taking a toll on my mental health please help
You said: "long story short my parents didnt allow me to go to all of the events..."
Excuse me but unless you were in some accelerated program and are in college at younger than 18, they have no business telling you what to do or not do anymore as you are an adult.
If you haven't come to a place of wanting your independence, or standing up for it with the parents(in the nicest way you can) then I wonder if you are not totally comfortable in social settings. I mention this because I used to have social anxiety as a kid and teen but dealt with it and learned how to no longer have those anxieties. Its a process dear and as scary as it may seem, it can only get better if you apply yourself towards gaining more self confidence. In looking back, I realize now that the reason I had so few friends in school was because I lacked self confidence. People are not attracted to others even for just friends, with any persons who are too quiet, have difficulty holding conversations and keeping people captivated, even blessing them with your own brand of humor. I can't say why you are having struggles with friends. Perhaps they all have been bad choices in friends, or initially pretended to be someone they really weren't.
If you are honest with yourself, you likely find it more fun to be around a person who is outgoing, friendly, self confident, able to laugh at themselves and don't mind others laughing with them. I used to think it always was laughing at me. Don't try anything that doesn't feel like its 'you'. Even the quiet people will always have a couple of true friends. But to have none at all, means the problem isn't always all those other people. It's probably nothing big hon, and a few minor adjustments, letting the real you show through, not holding back out of fear, and being a good friend to those who are not yet friends will gain you some new friends. I hope I haven't offended you. I am only answering based on how I interpreted what you wrote and only hope that you might be encouraged to do what you can to enjoy college and make some really good new friends.
Don't worry about highschool frineds not staying in touch. People change a lot from childhood to HS, and again from HS to college. We do a lot of personal growth and changing hopefully for the better at these ages and often the changes we undergo make us no longer as compatible with old friends as we once were. I've experienced this many times, even later in adulthood as I continued to be open to change and improve as a person. There are many people I no longer care to hang with as I would have to pretend to have the same interests or beliefs and that is not how I see myself having a good time.
Good luck!