I'm in love with the American Eagle brand at Payless. They make some of the most comfortable cute heels I've ever owned. The heels tend to be about 2-3 inches high. I can't walk in anything higher!

http://www.payless.com/store/catalog/brandlisting.jsp?trail=1014:100007&catId=cat10376&brandId=100007

I'm 21 and plus-sized too! It does carry some unique challenges.

My suggestion: dare it up a little, but not too much. You're out of your teens and getting into adulthood, so you have to be careful not to dress like a teenager or you'll end up looking older than you are... "mutton dressed as lamb" (although we're hardly mutton at this age!)

I don't know what plus-sized stores you have available, but I love some of the stuff at Addition-Elle and MXM. They tend to have some more trendy, youthful stuff. Rather expensive, though.

The other store that has come through for me time and time again is Old Navy, when it comes to things like t-shirts. They've got some great peasant-y styles in right now that are super-cute and flattering.

Odd as this may sound, don't follow the trends religiously. For instance, I know that leggings and skinny jeans are in right now, but they aren't flattering on ANYBODY. If you stick to a classic, timeless look and jazz it up with the occasional trendy detail, you'll look more your age. For me, shoes and jewellery are my big things. I wear mostly regular shirts and jeans, but I'll wear fun jewellery or shoes in a cute colour to balance it out.

Don't be afraid of colour, but avoid cutesy patterns and graphic Ts. A plain or embellished top will look so much nicer than a t-shirt with an ironic phrase on it.

Oh, and if you're like me and hate walking stilettos (I swear they only work for 110 lb women), I find that the American Eagle brand at Payless has the best heels. They're a little chunkier without being clunky, and they're really cute.

As for hair and makeup, avoid soccer-mom haircuts or anything too high-maintenance. Go for something soft and feminine, rather than edgy or professional-looking. With makeup, wear as little as possible. If you can get away with it, don't use foundation or lipstick. Just a smidge of eyeliner and mascara with a lip gloss should do it!

Here's what I have on my walking playlist:

(ARTIST)- (TITLE)

Juliette and the Licks - Purgatory Blues
T-Rex - Solid Gold Easy Action
Corey Hart - I Wear My Sunglasses At Night
Franz Ferdinand - Ulysses
Bikini Kill - Rebel Girl
R.E.M. - Crush With Eyeliner
Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
Dave, Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick and Tich - Hold Tight
Jimi Hendrix - Foxy Lady
Of Montreal - Wraith Pinned to the Mist and Other Games
Van Halen - Hot For Teacher
Bobby Conn - The Style I Need
The Bravery - Honest Mistake
Dee-Lite - Groove is in the Heart
Fatboy Slim - Weapon of Choice
The Sex Pistols - Blister in the Sun
Bachman Turner Overdrive - You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet
Queen - Don't Stop Me Now
Barry White - Can't Get Enough of Your Love
The Beatles - Twist and Shout
Strawberry Alarm Clock - Incense and Peppermints
Dogs Die In Hot Cars - Celebrity Sanctum
Neil Diamond - Sweet Caroline
Rush - The Spirit of Radio
Rush - Freewill
The Shins - Turn a Square
Sloan - Ready for You
The Tragically Hip - Poets
The Tragically Hip - A Beautiful Thing
David Bowie - Suffragette City
David Bowie - John, I'm Only Dancing

Any work from home job that promises that you will make 500$ a week on less than full time is very likely a scam, in my experience.

I currently work from home for a call answering service, answering phones for businesses in off hours. It pays $10 an hour, and I put in about 60 hours a week, all at very awkward times (mornings, evenings, and weekends). You can always try getting with something like that. I don't have to sell anything, just take messages.

P.S. I'm working for a small local company, so I don't have any leads for you. Basically, I wait for calls to come in. It ranges between 10 and 50 calls an hour. I connect to the office through my home internet, using a company laptop. It probably differs greatly depending on the company, though. Good luck!

I was a big fan of books by George R.R. Martin. The first one in the series is called "A Game of Thrones".

Oh sweetie, I feel for you. My best friend had an abortion last year, and I was by her side the whole time. The problem with abortions is that they take care of you medically, but not psychologically. It's a very hard thing to deal with. Everybody goes through second-guessing afterwards, unless they're a terrible person.

First off, you are not a murderer. It was not a baby, it was a clump of cells. It didn't have consciousness, it didn't have feelings. Some may tell you that you ended a life, but it really hadn't started yet. It may not make you feel any better, but it is the truth.

You didn't do this for no reason, or for your convenience. You did what was best for you and the potential child, and that's what you need to do right now. You couldn't offer anything that a baby would need right now, and you recognized that fact, unlike the thousands of people every year who keep procreating despite their inability to support their children. As for adoption, it is an option, yes. It is not as easy as it seems, though.

Bringing a child into the world carries a great deal of responsibility with it. You and your boyfriend would never have stopped being parents, even if you had given up your baby for adoption. You would always wonder how they are, where they are, if they are happy or sad or lonely. Unless you had an open adoption, you'd never know. That's a huge burden to bear at the age of 20.

Some people can cope with having children at a young age, this is true. My mother was 20 and a college student when I was born. You weren't ready, and that is fine. You didn't make this decision because it would interfere with your ability to party; you made the decision because you felt that you could not bring a child into the situation you were in. That was a mature and responsible decision.

Does your school provide free counselling services? If they do, you should try to get in to see a professional. You're suffering from a depressive episode, and may need medical treatment for that. They may also be able to help with deferring or delaying exams.

Your boyfriend also needs to man up and be there for you. If he won't stay with you through this, how would he have handled an unplanned baby?

Life is not over. This was one ordeal of many that you will experience. Be strong, and take care of yourself. You are not a bad person.

NOTE: Sorry I didn't tell you what you wanted to hear. I just thought that by trying to get you to see things another way, you might feel better. Also, I totally agree that a clump of cells has life, but it does not have consciousness yet. It has no brain, and therefore is not capable of self-awareness. That is what I meant. If it helps you, by all means dwell on the past, but my main message was to keep moving forward, because you can't change the past and you've got a whole long life to live. I'm sorry that you felt that my answer was not up to par.

I'm going to risk a low rating here, since nobody else seems willing to do so.

Your mother, illogical and nasty as she may be right now, still has the final word.

Do you live under her roof? Does she feed you? Do you pay all your own expenses including rent and utilities?

You tolerate and respect her boyfriend who lives with you guys? That's great, and you're a better person for it! But you have to, because he was her choice, and it is her home. Unfortunately, she CAN forbid your guy from coming around, forbid you from seeing him, and she can refuse to like him. It sucks for the both of you, but you cannot force her into it.

This whole "guilting you and grounding you when you get caught" thing is what happens when you break your parents' rules. It's part of being a dependent. When you live in your own apartment, you can make your own rules.

Until you are living on your own, you're just going to have to deal with your mother's rules. I know it sucks. I was a teenager not too long ago, and I hated having to live under someone else's rules.

She may have her reasons for disliking him because of homeschooling (not saying they're right, just that she may have them) Is he homeschooled for any particular reason? Usually kids who are homeschooled when they have access to a regular school are kind of weird... either super-religious, or unable to cope in society, or have been expelled from other schools. Not saying that's the case, but that may be her perspective on him.

Don't go writing letters. Parents hate that... trust me, because I tried it when I was your age. If she won't listen, make her. If she won't come around, you'll have to keep risking getting caught, or wait until you're out of the house.

To make a long response short, Mom pays the bills, Mom makes the rules, and if those rules are broken, Mom can decide on the punishment.

I use Herbal Essences volume shampoo and conditioner. I find it's very light and keeps my hair from getting flat and greasy. I think it's animal friendly too.

I really don't watch much TV, but Battlestar Galactica got me SO hooked, in a way that no other show ever has.

I know, it sounds really dorky, but it's not just Sci-Fi. It's a crazy mix of drama, sci-fi and action. Incredibly well-written, with interesting characters and serious plot hooks!

http://www.spacecast.com/Shows/Battlestar-Galactica.aspx/

Regular PMS is not that bad.

It sounds like you may have PMDD, or Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder.

In order to fix that, unfortunately, you do need to see a doctor. Often, they will prescribe birth control, and sometimes an anti-depressant. Doesn't mean you're mentally ill, just that your hormones are messing with your brain for a while :)

P.S. Yes, I am a woman (21 years old). Women can be Ninjaneers too!

It's perfectly normal to want to have sex at this age. Your body's just waking up.

However, it doesn't mean that you should. Sex has a lot of responsibility and emotion tied to it. You may be physically ready to have sex, but not mentally.

At 3 months, you do not have a serious relationship. As an adult, at 3 months I just barely had a serious relationship with the man I am now engaged to. You may be "in love", but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's forever. Wait a few years, at least. If he hangs around that long without getting too antsy about the lack of sex, then he does care for sure.

You mention that you two grew up together. This might sound mean, but you still haven't grown up. If I had to write a list of all the differences between my 13 year old self and my 21 year old self, I'd run out of paper. You simply aren't fully materialized into your adult form. You don't know who you are yet. This is nothing against you in particular, just something common to all teenagers. You may think that this is what you want forever, but 2, 3, 5 years from now it may not be.

He doesn't only want to have sex if you want to. He wants to have sex. All teenage boys, regardless of how nice and ground-worshipping they are, are hormonal zombies. He's probably better than most, but chances are he hasn't really thought about the consequences.

Your mom is not being over-protective. She is being a mother. No parent wants to see their child lose their childhood so fast. There's no rush to grow up this quickly! You have years and years to do all this stuff, and it'll be so much sweeter when you finally do it because you waited. She recognizes that fact, and wants to protect you from making mistakes that you may regret later in life.

That being said... here are some things you need to do before going any further with this thought:

1) Play the "What If?" game with him. "What if I get pregnant?" "What if we aren't as close after?" "What if one of us has an STD?". You need to discuss all of this in intense detail. If you can't, or you can't agree on everything, or if you feel that you cannot handle the consequences, then you are not ready.

2) Birth Control: You need to both sit down and discuss what kind of birth control you are using. My suggestion: use at least 2 kinds, preferably 3. Condoms are a must to protect from STDs as well as pregnancy. Going on the pill or some other form of birth control will help increase your safety as well. Also, a spermicidal lubricant will add a little extra. Think that sounds overboard? How about being a 14 year old single mom. If you can't agree on the birth control to be used (i.e. he doesn't want to use condoms) or if you can't obtain at least two forms of birth control, then you are not ready.

3) Talk to your mom. She flipped, right? Talk to her about why. Find out what she thinks of all of this. Maybe she has some life experiences that can help you. My mom told me about her best friend who lost her virginity at age 10 and regretted it forever. You are young enough that your mother should have some real input into this decision.

I use Herbal Essences Volume shampoo and conditioner. I find that it's lighter than a lot of other ones, so it keeps my hair from getting greasy.

I did the same thing last summer :(

Unfortunately, that screen is toast. They will be able to replace it, but it often costs around $400-$500, if not more. So it may be worth your while to just get a new laptop.

In the meantime, you can always connect your laptop to a desktop monitor, so your documents aren't all lost!

My guy and I like to bring a baguette, some cold cuts (roast beef is a favourite), some sliced cheese and maybe a spread or two, like hummus or roasted red pepper cream cheese. For snacks, we bring fruit; either chopped up into bite-sized pieces, or berries. A great idea if you have the time is to make chocolate covered strawberries. For drinks, a sparkling wine is always nice, but if you're underage, just bring a bottle of pop. Fresca is great for picnics.

Another thing you can try is to minimize the number of electrical appliances you have running. (This is why the idea of putting the fan in front of the freezer won't work... your freezer will have to work harder, and will end up heating your room more!) Try to keep your tv and computer off. Also, if you can, avoid running your oven or stove. A microwave is far less likely to heat the room.

Something I like to do is if I'm sitting in one place for a while, I'll take a bowl of ice cubes and have the fan blow over them towards me.

And, as everyone has already suggested, try the fan in front of the window thing, facing inwards.

My personal favourite is called Muskol. It's got a higher content of the actual repellent than most other sprays. It's also a little more expensive, so I only use it when I'm off in the woods or swampy areas.

Otherwise, OFF! Skintastic works great. It comes in both a spray and a lotion, and it smells pretty good.

This question has a really simple answer, believe it or not.

1) Sunscreen. Wear a high SPF (30 or up)when you are going to be exposed. Wear a lip balm with an SPF as well.

2) Cover up. Sit in the shade when you can, or wear a cover-up and a big hat.

It may not be the best route to a nice glowing tan, but it does keep you from prematurely aging due to sun exposure and, more importantly, it keeps you from damaging your skin and causing cancer later on in life.

Oh goodness, this is why I hate media fear-mongering.

North Korea is a bit of a troublemaker. They've been testing missiles, and they refuse to give up their nuclear weapons development programs. Then again, the U.S. isn't likely to do that either, so I don't see the huge deal.

Basically, they've been testing missiles. Not firing at actual targets, and definitely not in U.S. airspace! They've been firing them over China, who has subsequently halted trade with them.

North Korea would never be so stupid as to attack the United States. Think about what would happen... not only would you guys beat the living tar out of them, so would the rest of your allies, because nobody likes an unprovoked attack.

Please don't worry yourself about North Korea. This is what happens when nothing else exciting is going on in the news, and they need a way to keep people buying newspapers.

If it helps any, here's an article explaining how the U.S. could defend against a nuclear attack from North Korea:

http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601103&sid=aUXajZZCfS88&refer=us

After the first shot wears off, it may take a year or even a little more to fully restore your fertility. So, you may be able to become pregnant, but you also may not be able to quite yet.

Personally, I stopped the shot last summer and am now just getting a normal cycle back. I was on it for a year, though, and everyone is different.

Unfortunately, you'll just have to give it time now, and keep trying!

This guy sounds like a colossal jerk. And hey, he may just be like that. Two things need to happen here.

1) You need to tell him it's not cool. Confront him about it when he's nasty to you in front of other people. Ask him what you did that's so terrible. Put him on the spot. With other people around, that may put him in his place. Ask him what a big strong guy like him is doing picking on a girl. The dumber you make him look, the better. Just don't do it for no reason; make sure he deserves it, or you're just living up to what he says you are.

2) Where is your boyfriend in all of this? My guy would have socked the guy in the nose by now. You have to tell him that his friend is hurting you, and that he needs to step up and defend you if your relationship and you mean anything to him.

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.

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