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April 28, 2014

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hey i am having a problem me and my b/f ahve been together like3 years noe and he broke up with me and said he was gay now hes flirting with this other girl all the tim she moved about 2 days ago now he wants to get back together i mean i still really like him i just don't want to get hurt again what should i do?

Look this guy sounds really confused (or he is a liar). Since I dont know any specific details all I can say is be careful, I figure the chance of getting hurt again is pretty high. If you really really do want to get back with him, at least sit him down and explain your concerns to him- if he is a nice guy he should take the extra time to consider your feelings in this.

hey! ok so me and my boyfriend have sex frequently and sometimes we dont use a condom...but i tend to queef a lot and i was wondering what that might be from? or if its normal? or if theres anyway to prevent or minimalize it...he doesnt seem to mind it but it annoys me and makes me self concious in bed...any help would be great! thanks:-)

Ok, I was curious about what you were talking about so I looked up queef on the net. By accident I stumbled on this link where they say its normal, and talk of excercises you can do to minimise it http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queef Hope this helps.

Hi I havent been very hungry at all! and idk why! I just recently went on this "diet" because I am 5'0 and 150...where I only eat 3 meals a day well for about 2 weeks now I havent been hungry for breakfast, or lunch and I dont eat any snaks inbweteen. like today I didnt eat breakfast and I was fine and I didnt have lunch and I was fine, I am not trying to starve myself!!! I just dont like food for some reason! Is it because my body is now use to not having as much junk food as I use to?/? please help!! And can you give me some ideas on how to loose my "love handles" also to thin out my legs and stomach area..please help..I hope my body isnt shutting down on mee..
* srry if this was long*
♥

Heres whats happening. Whenever you eat rarely, and particularly if you engage in little excercise, your metabolism slows down. This is because whenver food intake is far apart, your body is programmed to go into "famine mode" which out in the wild, was intended to save us from starvation (by making us able to survive off little food). Now the problem with this is that you wont lose much weight from fat because your body will burn the easiest thing possible---- your muscles! Thats why most diets are borderline dangerous. Going briefly to the second part of your question (the love handles, legs etc etc) let me stress that no matter what anyone tells you, it is impossible to lose fat from a given area of the body. You can make your whole body lose weight, but the order fat is lost in is NEVER up to you- our bodies dont work that way. So this is what you need to do to fix your problem. First speed up your metabolism by forcing yourself to eat 4 to 6 SMALL meals a day. This tells your body that there is ample food. Then engage in excercise to lose fat and, if you want, build muscle. Doing weights is the best way to lose fat because no excercise has such a profound effect on the metabolism as resistance training. My answer is long as hell so I will stop here, but feel free to send me any further questions you may have and I will give you more info if you want. Best of luck.

Everytime someone compliments me I think they just want something from me and they are scheming against me. Everytime I get supposedly good news I think its a bunch of bull and that its not true. I'm not a pescimist, I think realistically but I feel like nothing good can happen in my life and I'm always alone. Is there something wrong with me?

Well the bad news is you are a pessimist, no offence intended. Now, of course there isnt anything wrong with you as such, the only down side is that you might alienate some people that would be good to you. Essentially you risk having a worse life than you should be having. The good news is that once you face this pessimistic fact, no pun intended, you can change. Being realistic means that you take a sceptic, open minded approach to things, not that you assume the worst. Seriously, what if you find yourself looking back at the ripe old age of 85 years old, having pushed people aside and having avoided nice experiences, only to realise that people actually liked you. Now wouldnt that just suck?

do you think its better to fit in and go agianst yur own beliefs OR to be a little ""less popular"" and do what you want to do? i am stuck in between.

In my opinion its wrong to go against your own beliefs. If you let others dictate how you act then you arent really a person anymore, you are a puppet. Popularity is nice and all that, but remember that if you had to compromise yourself for it, its not really YOU that they like. They like the person that you are pretending to be.

I want to workout my legs. i have no idea how though. im not even sure how to do squats right. pleez help! ( i also want ot kno a website that tells you if u are underweight/overweight... i used to have it but i lost it)

Ok, I can help you with the excercise part of your question. Instead of explaining I will give you a really good link: http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/exercises.htm Now, you will see a picture of the human body where you can click on any muscle group. Select quads and it will show you leg excercises performed correctly and incorrectly, with detailed instructions. It includes doing squats (which is the most effective way to train your legs up). As for calculating overweightness try this link: http://www.freeweightlosscenter.com/areufat.htm
its not perfect but its better than many other sites cause it takes waist size into account not just height and pounds.

This guy is like in love with me and he always sends me all these poems and qoutes on how much but im wit a guy t hat i already love and he rele gets sick of this other guy telling em how much he loves me..how can i get this guy to leave me alone i mean ii wanan still be friends with im but..i dont want him to love me anymore..

Love,

WAnt HiM To mOVe On

Ok, Im going to be honest with you here, the friendship will not work. I have tried this personally and I have seen it with others. When a guy really loves a girl he cannot just be her friend (at least not for long). He will be jealous of your bf, and though he will think he likes to be around you it wont be good for him. If he hangs around you a lot, as a friend, he wont be able to get over you, so the love feeling remains. This will make him miserable, and probably make you feel wierd. I know its not the answer you wanted but, in my opinion, make a clean break from your friendship until after you are sure he is over you. You can even explain this to him. He might be a bit hurt but beleive me its far more painful for him to be really close to the girl he loves, to see her with her bf, and not be able to do anything about it.

New Years Eve, aka tomorrow night is my friend Lisa's birthday. She is throwing a small party that starts at three thirty. My friend Jenny and I want to go to another party that is kind of late at night. Lisa never really articulated when her party was over and doesn't really seem to express interest in late night stuff. So me and Jenny are confused if it's rude to leave her party at 11 or so to go to the other one because we really, really, really don't want to hurt Lisa's feelings.

I think you should ask her. Its too risky to guess, since she might really be offended if her party lasts into the night and you leave. Dont mention the other party at first, just ask how long she figured her party will last since it is new years eve and you want to plan out your night. Then, based on her answer you can then choose to mention the other party (maybe inviting her along or whatever) or not. If you ask her diplomatically you cant go wrong.

well i like this boy right and he's spanish and i have no problem with that b/c he''s really sweet and cute. but all my friends do b/c im like white and we're totally diff and some of my friends are sort of racist. i don't know what to do b/c i rlly like this boy...what should i do

This is harder to do than to say, but believe me you are better off- never ever let your friends influence you in this way. You are an individual with a will of your own, if you like this guy then your friends have to live with it. Be strong and dont take any crap.

Whats up everybody! I smoke weed and love it. But i want to quit. They say weed is not addicting, but if it isnt, then how come i can not quit? I love it so much. But know it will get me nowhere. So how can i quit? Or should i not quit?

The thing about weed not being addictive is not entirely correct. Weed is not physically addictive (you wont get withdrawal symptoms), but it can have a certain amount of psyhological addictiveness. I went through a couple of years in my early twenties when I was hooked on it- and let me tell you I cant remember much from those years lol. Also, if you smoke it in a context where it is mixed with tobacco, then of course you have to add the (much more powerful) addictive properties of ciggarettes which are both physical and psycological. Quiting is of course up to you. Weed is not particularly dangerous, but if you do it regularly it will definatetely start to affect your life (similarly to if you were an alcoholic). I know some people who can smoke a joint in the weekend and then stop. I also know others who devote over half their salaries to weed and do little else than light up. If you are in the latter group, Id say you should try to quit. All I can tell you that quiting weed is just like quiting ciggarettes, theres really no secret way you simply have to endure a couple of weeks of hell (and devour plenty or gum/ lolipops/etc). Good luck.

im 13/f and ive never kissed some1...is there something wrong with me?

Of course not. Different people pace themselves differently, so its all up to you in the end. Dont worry about it, the right time to kiss someone is only when you feel ready.

hey... i'm only 13 but i really want to lose 15 pounds, if i do i won't get sick or anything will i? i don't want to have like health problems for the rest of my life. i'm only about 5'2 and i weigh like 115!! my mom says its from muscle cuse i play soccer like ALOT, but i really don't like the way i look. almost everyone i know is so much frikin skinnier than me. i'm not going to like cut out food compleatly, i just want to lose 15 pounds in like a month or so... is it safe? thanks a bunch!!

Losing 15 pounds in a month is completely unhealthy for someone your weight. The heavier you are the more you can allow yourself to lose in a given time period- but 15pounds in a month is a lot for a 400 pound man.
Seriously though, why not do it in three months and do it safely? All you should do is create a small calorie deficit and increase your level of excercise slightly and it will come off. Good luck.

im a freshman in highschool and i cant really say that up until now life has been great cause it hasnt... but thats not the problem..the problem is i think im fat.... im 100 pounds and i wanna be 80.... i used to think i was skinny but i dont anymore.... people call me fat at school like there just kidden but theres always truth behind a just kidding.... i tried not eating but i cant do that it just makes me sick and tired.... ive been doing 100 sit ups everynight and its not doing anything... please tell me what i can do... or tell why i feel so ugly :/ thanxx

Ok... here goes. Unless you are very very short AND have a teeny weeny build you arent overweight. I wont speculate as to why you feel ugly, other than that I would guess that its merely another case of the complex most kids have today (blame Barby or MTV or whatever but its true). However, perhaps your fat to muscle ratio is a bit off, in which case you shouldnt aim to get lighter- merely to subsitute some of the fat for muscle.
Im glad you said the thing about sit ups because there is a disease on this site, it seems most advice givers have hit their heads against something hard and woke up to think crunches/sit ups make you lose weight (or worse, can make you lose weight from your stomach). Excercise helps you lose weight (from all over the body at once), crunches are one (very limited) type of excercise, you might as well only be training your biceps. What you need to do is to start a weight training program. It is the absolute best way to lose or gain weight depending on how you target your training. Weights elevate your metabolism and make you burn fat all day long (no aerobic exercise does this). Then you can decide how much muscle you want to add until you look right (by your definition of course). Join a gym and then get advice on how to set up your routine. Dont worry about bulking up (girls usually worry about this), you wont- its virtually impossible, and any effect will happen slowly, well under your control.

I'm 5'7", and under 100lbs - unrealistically skinny, but unfortunately definite. The only problem is that my stomach is not as flat as it could be, any tips on gaining weight and stomach flattening?

Unfortunately there is no way to lose weight from a specific area of the body. Other people answering may say to do crunches or the like (this is typical advice on this site), but keep in mind thats just a popular myth. What I would recommend is to go to the gym and start a weight training program. Ask for a workout routine designed to help you gain weight. Dont worry about "bulking up", it doesnt happen overnight (plus its almost impossible if you are female) and you can control your progress. It is very likely that you will prefer your look once you get some definition. Finally, some abdominal muscles might tighten the area up making it look flatter.

I'm 6'11" 430lbs Male. I need a plan for weight loss, and i need to lose it soon. My doctor has suggested surgery, and i do not want to go there until i absoulty have to. It is literally killing me. Please give me some low cost solutions on losing weight. Thanks.

Seriously, people here dont know what they are talking about. For Petes sake beware the crap (and potentially dangerous) advice some people have given before me.
First of all lets get something straight, weight loss has to be gradual and permanent. For this you need a lifestyle change where you create a small calorie deficiency in your meals and increase your activity level. Let me tell you a few things that are INCORRECT that you may hear, "you need to go on a special diet", "running is the best excercise to lose weight", "doing crunches helps you lose weight on your stomach", "eat only lettuce or cardboard or tuna", "dont eat after xxx time in the day" etc. Here are some real issues you should consider regarding excercise and eating.
1- Eat small meals three to five times a day (eating fequently, but not excessively, elevates your metabolism), 2- Eat balanced meals (seriously NOT a Tuna diet) and avoid saturated fats (such as animal fats found in butter, lard etc), 3- Create a small calorie deficiency (this can be done scientifically or by trial and error- a good tip is to always feel just a bit hungry when you go to sleep), 4- Dont starve yourself 5- Try to introduce regular weeekly workouts (I have to emphasise that the best thing here is doing WEIGHTS not running, they are superior for sliming down due to their effect upon the metabolism- doing both is even better of course). Remember also that many diets make you lose weight through water loss (which is quickly regained), or by devouring your muscle mass. Anything much more than a couple of pounds of weight loss per week is probably not fat (or not JUST fat), and thus unhealthy. Join a gym if you can afford it and try to build up some lean muscle mass (every pound of muscle requires a certain amount of calories to sustain it- this means you burn calories in your sleep- aerobic exercise does not do that). Hope this helped, and best of luck to you.

my arm has been hurting for the past week like by the socket...idk what i should do... it hurts sometimes but not all the time... i told my mom and she wont do anything about it. anyone know what might be the cause?

There isnt enough information here. It sounds like a simple strain (joint or muscle). Do you play any sports where you might have sprained/ overstrained it? (e.g. tennis, baseball etc). Its very possible you strained it without realising it (Ive dont it a bunch of times). Either way one week is nothing to worry about. If it persists though insist on seeing a doctor.

hi im almost 16 and my parents never told me straight up if i can date or not but they know i have anyways i want to bring a guy home how do i ask my mom or should i just bring him or wat i dont want to make my bf feel weird or my parents but this is the thing my bf doesnt speak the language my parnts do he only speaks english and my parents only understand but they cant speak help me out i rate good thanx

Do NOT just bring the guy over to your house. That has the potential of becoming a real disaster (embarassing for you and your date). The only answer as far as I can see, is to talk to your parents and explain everything (language issue as well). This way there are no surprises, and the situation has a far better chance of passing smoothly.

theres this really hot kid that ive had connections with in the past..(the beginning of october) but now he has a gf .. he makes fun of me alot..like when i say something. he would imitate me . is he flirting with me? or is he just being a jerk?

There isnt enough info here. It isnt necessarily one or the other. He could just as easily be flirting with you as he could simply be treating you as a friend. Either explanation could work to explain the attention he gives you. Now, if he also makes a lot of excuses to touch you (even as innocently as a pat on the back) then I would say its a different matter.

my boyfriend or well my friend that im messing around with gave me a condom for if we have sex so i have it and i dunno where to put it so my mom dont find it i mean rite now i have it hidden in a playstation game case..lol
HELP

Lol. When I was young I hid mine inside a bike light (behind the battery). I recommend stuff like that, moms never look inside electrical appliances and the like. I mean, putting it inside a clock radio (theres always spare room in there) is fool proof isnt it? lol then again maybe its overkill. Good luck.

What's the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone to you guys? I'd appreciate some of your opinions.

JyNxiE

Loving someone is a gentler sort of feeling, one that you get from sincere affection and a good relationship. Being in love is that powerful feeling you get when you first fall for someone. Its one of the most intense feelings anyone can have. Unfortunately it is also temporary and, when it is gone, hopefully one has built enough of a relationship to still love that person.

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