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Hey i really need help I feel very very lonely and i always feel like crying and so empty inside i dont know what to do :( i have a boyfriend and i have a great family i just dont know why i feel this way i dont know what to do even right now i feel like crying its so hard im so lost i really dont know what to do please help

I am so sorry to hear you are sad. I dont know what reasons you might have for feeling the way you do, but based on what you wrote this sounds like clinical depression to me. If that is the case, you should really talk to a professional. Depression can be a very dangerous thing if left unchecked, while at the same time it is not so hard to cure (as far as i heard anyway). I also dont know how old you are. If you are a teen it is not uncommon to feel this way, and so it might just be a phase you are going through. Nevertheless, talk to someone close to you, someone who knows you well, and discuss the possibility of getting outside help. Im sorry if this wasnt a lot of help, but there is little i can say to make you feel better. All the best to you.

I have to give an oral presentation in fron otthe whole class, but I suck at public speaking. I start getting really red and then i start to shake and I stumble over words. Right now I am absolutly terrified at the thought of giving a speech. What can I do to overcome this fear?

Please dont give me an answer that says "you will fail everytime"

Now this is a question i can relate to on a very personal level. I have had to do far more than my fair share of public speaking in my life and I loathe it as much as you do. There is no trick (like the old "picture them all naked" crap) that will help you in my opinion. What you need to do is to remember the following things: 1 Most of the time, the people you are speaking to arent that interested in your presentation- it looks as though they are staring at you but often they arent paying as much attention as it seems 2- The only way you can ever hope to feel comfortable up there is by mastering whatever subject you are dealing with- so, be prepared, have no doubt that you know all there is to know 3- Go SLOW... most nervous people rush it and thats one reason why the stumble 4- When you practice your speech, try doing it without your notes a few times and just improvise it as you go along (rather than memorising it strictly), as though you were having a conversation with someone- this will help you get a more natural flowing feel to it 5- Finally dont over stress yourself prior to the speech, give it one final run through on the day but no more, remember you know your stuff and that in the end this speech is not all that important anyway.

In all of your weight loss responses they say stuff like eat 4-6 small meals a day....can you please give me an example of a small meal?? thank you

Well, this is not an easy question as it depends on your body weight, activity level and so on. For me a small meal could be something like a couple of slices of turkey, a small salad and a baked potato. If one eats 6 times then two meals or so should be a bit smaller (could be something as simple as a portion of cottage cheese or just a salad). A good indicator is that you are still just a little bit hungry when you stop eating. At no point in the day should you ever feel very full, and neither should you feel very hungry- this way your body is kept working and it works great on the metabolism.

okay well me and my boyfriend broke up b/c i cheated on him and i told him the truth he told me that we needed time apart so he can think does that mean he wll come back later what should i do wait or move on he told me he loved me andalways will and he still wants to be my friend but do you think he will come back to me i wish he could give me a second chance b/c i gave him plenty well get back to me plz should i wait or move on
thanxs nikki

Unfortunately this depends entirely on the guy. Some guys would give you a second chance while others would not. However, I think the odds are in your favour since he said "time apart" rather than "its all over". So, I would wait if I were you. Give him a couple of months to sort through his feelings. There are no guarantees but if he remains your friend then it is likely that, in time, he will forgive you.

OK ive been on a diet for about 5 days and i have been really goo about eating no junk. I even lost 2 pounds when i went on the scale today...roblem is..im a typical overweight american : I love my junkfood..Its getting so0o hard to turn down the junk..im afraid im going to give in and ruin my diet. My weight has been fluctuating..i might be 2 lbs lighter, then maybe 1, then back to my beginning weight.
How can i keep my weight from fluctuating and how can i deal with my cravings for food?? please dont say just tough it out..because its way to hard. :/
Any other losing weight tips most appreciated...5's for helpful answers.

The answers people have given you regarding the cravings are good. There is not much to do other than finding as many healthy alternatives as possible. One thing I read about and also have heard people do (Sylvester Stallone apparently amongst others) is to take a day every week or ten days or so where they eat quite a few calories above their daily requirements. In the magazine it said that this helped ensure your body´s metabolism didnt go into famine mode (where it digests your muscles and so on). Just be careful and make sure you dont lapse back to eating junk on a regular basis. Oh, and regarding the fluctuations, unfortunately thats largely due to the water loss/gain. If it bothers you do what I did... weigh yourself once every few days.

My best friend is really rich and she always likes to brag about her $3.2 million mansion and how mine is only worth $1.2 million. I never really had a problem with her being so "Oh mine is better than yours" because shes done it with our cars, our clothes, etc. But its beginning to bug me because she wrote me this really long email about how she went to Hollister Co. and bought $3,000 worth of stuff. She began listing it one by one. 37 logo shirts ($721), 7 pairs of capris ($276)...and she listed it all the way to underwear, flip flops, mini skirts, shorts, bathing suits, and fragrance. Is that just a little too much? Because I think so. See my family is rich, but we like to save our money. But her family, blows it all on stuff they dont really need. Her $3,000 wardrobe will be thrown out when spring/summer is over. The email really bothered me...I'm not jealous. I can go to Hollister and spend a lot of $$ too. But, how can I teach her that money is not everything...and tell her she can save money while still looking great in all the latest fashion and styles?

How utterly annoying this must get for you. For a very brief time when I was young I new a kid who was just like that. At the time I classified him as a moron and didnt see him anymore. In hindsight I think he actually deserved my pity. His life was so empty that if you removed these "things" or the cold cash there wasnt much left. However, what you are trying to do is very hard indeed. I cant say that I know the best way for you to proceed but you have a choice between the direct approach or the indirect approach. Try asking "Why do you always value everything by its price?" or "Why are you always comparing our stuff?". Alternatively you could try the more subtle approach of changing the subject to quality whenever she brings up price. If she says "I spent 500$ on clothes" you could say "I really like the skirt but those shoes are terrible... I can show you some much nicer ones at this store". I know this isnt much help but the key thing is to make her understand that you sometimes buy cheaper stuff because you choose to not because you have to. Good luck to you whatever you chose.

ok. I almost lost my home yesterday because of a huge flood. and i was to call my "best friend" on the phone. and this is the conversation.
me: hey
her:hey I heard about the flood
me: yeah, they might not let us back in our houses for 2-3 months.I'm basicly homeless.
her:oh well I have 2 friends over and I don't want to be rude
me: *scoffs* yeah ok bye
her:bye

....there were only two friends of mine that said "hey well if you need a place to live you can come here" if my "friend" was actually my friend why did she blow me off in my time of need?

Thats terrible. I am not sure i would classify them as friends anymore if i were in your shoes. The only excuse i can think of is if for some reason they were not able to invite you to stay with them (like if they had roommates or lived in their parents place). But all of this still does not excuse that phone conversation one bit. Sometimes people have very different definitions of friendship and one tends to find out the hard way (I have been through my share of let downs). Anyway maybe you should use this experience to sort out your real friends from your acquaintances.

I think there should be a requirement on this website saying "PEOPLE SHOULD BE FAMILIAR WITH A TOPIC BEFORE SUBMITTING THEIR PERSONAL OPINIONS". Frankly, I feel this is a helpful and useful site. But far to often, people are excercising their "freedom of speech" rights, and disguising their opinions as bonifide advice.
What set me off was a question asked by a friend of a gay male teen. A large majority of the answers were hateful diatribes delivered by self-righteous homophobes. From the advice you would of thought that her friend had leaprosy. Life is too short to HATE.
I had a good friend in high school that was the son of a youth pastor. The son, my friend, was gay. He chose to kill himself rather than live a life hating himself because he was gay. I did not know he was gay until after he died. I have so many woulda-coulda-shoulda's. Much of my advice on this website is given to those that are gay or know someone who is gay. To me, this is common sense. How can someone who is not gay, does not associate with anyone who is gay, has never associated with anyone who is gay, HOW CAN THEY give advice on a subject dealing with being GAY. I cannot give advice to someone about what it is like to give birth to a baby!! I cannot even attempt anything as such for I do not understand what mothers go through. Its silly. Now imagine if I was trained by others to believe that giving birth to a baby is disgusting and I hated mothers. This analogy is outlandish, but this is how I feel about the "advice" many people give.
Now throughout this "STATEMENT" I do have a question. What do you think? Help me to understand. Am I judging the judgemental, making me just as bad? Or do I have a point? This is the one time that I'd like to hear the opinions.

I agree with you 100%. I have in the past criticised other peoples advice involving fitness and nutrition (which is a subject that I happen to know something about). Very very often the advice is downright harmful, but is presented as though the advice giver is some sort of expert. Frankly, this site has made me quite angry at times for exactly the same reasons you outlined above. So... you do have a very valid point and more people should pay attention to it. Opinions are ok, but they shouldnt be disguised as expert advice, in the very least they could start by saying "I have no clue about this topic, but here is my opinion anyway...".

ok i have a few very close friends and some not so.. But what i was wondering is... if i ended up on disney channel what do you think they would do? be jelouce? would they still want to be my friends? or just use me?
What would you think if you're friend suddenly out of the blue got excepted on a popular show?
+ concerned and worried

First of all congrats if it goes through. Secondly, your friends should be supportive of you and should in general be happy for your success. You should not be worrying about this. Look at it this way, if they are real friends then this experience wont affect your relationshiop in any major way but, if they are not real friends, then this experience might make you aware of this sooner rather than later. Just look for signs that people are acting different towards you, or if distant acquaintances suddenly want to be close buddies. Anyway, if it were my friend I would be very happy.

ok so i find cute guys and all there all nice ya no evry girl wants a nice sweet one but no they act sweet for about 1 day thn want to have sex. im so sick of horny guys just doing this its so annoying. k help

All guys are NOT like that. I will grant you that many of them are (depending also on what age group you are in). Since people seem to have no trouble insulting men as a group, let me commit just a bit of sexism with my next generalistic statment: Girls always go for the wrong guys, and seem to lack the ability to tell fake niceness from real niceness. This lack of ability, after a lifetime of wrong choices leads them to think... "all guys are like that". Now, here is my advice to you. First of all look at how the guy acts when he is being nice in other situations. The fake guys will have a very different routine just for you (typically they will either be overly nice, or act very sensitive when they usually dont, or they will have intimate personal stories to share). Secondly, perhaps try looking in a different category. Mix it up a bit, maybe go for shy guys who wouldnt normally approach you or something like that. The other thing i can suggest is try to tell them from the start that you arent interested in having sex. Tell them you want to be celibate til you get to XX age or whatever. You dont have to stick to it, just see which guys still want to go out with you :). Good luck.

Hey I was just wondering, because I have a Samsung Digimax 130 camera, and it was on the top shelf of my desk and fellow like 5 inches down to the next, and now it won't work! Yikes! My dad is gonna kill me =( It won't turn on or anything. Shoot I'm dead. Please help. I will leave you good feedback and rate you well. =) Thanks in advance a zillion! =/

Those cameras can usually take a 5 inch drop... are you sure that the batteries are all charged up or that they havent been jolted out of place during the fall? Otherwise what I would do is to take it to an electronics shop and have them look at it (without telling your dad). Alternatively you could always pretend not to know what happened... as in "hey dad, this damn camera wont turn on!" - lol i dunno its an idea anyways, good luck 2 u

My boyfriend like to fidle around with my chest, and oh do I not mind, I think it is pleasureable and feels incredible, but he also will ask me to touch myself like he does. The thing is, I don't mind touching my breats like that, I like the feeling of me touching them and it kind of turns me on. Is this weird or wrong?

no and no...

I am not overweight, but I have a problem in that my thighs and ass are quite flabby and I would like to tone up. I feel very self-concious in swim suits so I would like some exercises to tone up or help lose weight ready for the summer.
Suggestions not involving cosmetic surgery would help!
14/f

Any exercise specifically focused on the area (e.g. squats, lunges, etc) will only build muscle there. These exercises will not remove the flab and may, at most, tighten the area up a bit (though in reality you will simply have muscle covered in flab). Running and other aerobics might help in that they may make you lose weight overall, and this weight MIGHT be taken from that area. The bitter reality is that you cannot target an area of the body for weight loss. So your choice is either to A. leave it alone or B engage in general weight loss. If you chose B, then its a matter of eating many small balanced meals every day and increasing your acitvity level. Exercise wise, resistance trainning is the best (e.g. weights) as this boosts your metabolism. Sorry if this wastn what you were after but thats the way it is.

i know i have dreams.. i just cant remember any of them! they are nightmares and they wake me up.. i think about them for awhile.. then i go back to sleep but when i wake up again i dont remember them anymore i just know i had a dream because i remmeber waking up.. is this weird?

Its not weird at all. It tried that myself. Perhaps you are being bothered by something subconsciously. If you want to remember your dreams (and see if theres something behind them) you have to stay up a bit longer when you wake up after the nightmares. That way your mind will store them in long term memory (when you sleep, and in periods when you have just woken up your mind stores in short term memory only). Try taking a notepad on the night table and writting them down... might be interesting.

how do you give a handjob, how long does it take for him to cum, and does it like shoot out or what happenes?

ok, what a lot of terrible answers omg. Listen, the technique is simple enough and has been described adequately. However, the time it takes varies with the guy and with the time since his last ejaculation. Seriously it could be 20 secs or 10 minutes (oh, and also depending on the speed at which you do it at). Speaking of speed, dont do it too fast and dont jack it really hard downwards (I know one guy whose girlfriend made him bleed... yikes!). Just maintain a steady rythm and all will be fine. As for the pressure, it also depends on the guy. Sorry to confuse you but expect the unexpected lol. Some guys naturally shoot really far while for others it just sort of dribbles out. There really is no way to tell.

one group of my friends drink a lot and i dont really care that much about it. im not against it or anything. my only concern is that i know sometime i will be involved in a situation where i will be asked if i want a drink... the thing is, i have never drank before, i don't want to say no, but i don't want to get the reputation that i always do that stuff. whats your advice?

oooOOhhH PeeER PreSSuuure... lol

Never ever be influenced by peer pressure. Figure out if you want to try drinking or if you dont. Then act accordingly (note: I am assuming you are an adult... if you are say 14 just dont do it). Now, dont take this the wrong way, but there is one thing that I think is a bit troubling about your question. Note how on the one hand you speak of the pressure of being asked to drink, while on the other you mention "the reputation that I always do that stuff". Correct me if Im wrong but both are cases of what others will think, not what you want. Be careful about focusing too much on what is expected/ wanted of you, on the one hand it can get you in trouble, on the other hand you will end up doing stuff you dont care for.

ok im 15 i weigh(dont laugh) 180 lbs. im fat! i need some type of home excersise to loose the fat in my waist and help get a nice lookin stomach! can u hep?

Sorry for the delay, I havent checked my account in a bit. Home excercising is hard because one usually doesnt have so much available there. One of the key things about weight loss is to speed up your metabolism. For that you absolutely need to do some sort of resistance training. Its quite important to work all/most of your muscles for this to work, focusing on any single group wont have any real effect. Therefore I recommend you get either a dumbell (which you can use for multiple types of exercise) or these elastic training ropes- sry I dont know what they are called (basically its a bar with an elastic band hooked at each end- you stand on the elastic band and lift the bar... its cheap and reasonably effective). If you really dont want take either option then do a combination of push ups, crunches, squats and lower back lifts- say 2-4 sets of each. That should have an ok effect. Now, let me also stress that there is no way to target weight loss from a specific area of the body, no matter what anyone says. All you can do is make your body start weight loss, but the order of that loss is geneticaly controlled. Typically on this site people tell you to "go do 100 situps/crunches every day" to lose weight, but thats just plain wrong. Anyhow, dont forget how important it is to eat right, not to starve yourself and to cut down on saturated fats. I know my answer has been a bit vague, but get back to me once you have decided how you want to train yourself up and i can give you more specific advice on how to do certain exercises and so on. Best of luck to you.

Guys only please-just a quick question wondering if i could get some feedback

i used to have a friends with benefits deal with this kid-and after going on for about a year it ended just recently about 3 months ago-my question-do you think it would be akward for me to IM and just start talking to him him seeing as i've never done so before or as a guy would u find that akward and uncalled for? just wondering thanks a lot

Its generalising i know, but most guys prefer the direct approach. So i think your method is fine.

my friend and i found pictures on the floor of the 7th graders... so we drew on two of the pictures saying fat lard... but they told the principal ((being 7th graders and soo gay))... what should we do bc they have cameras in the class.....

My advice is confess and apologise if u are on tape (actually... if you are a decent person). I do have a question for you. What were the 7th graders supposed to do in your opinion? I assume that you are older than they are, so they were not exactly in a good position to say... kick your ass (which i must admit would have been my first impulse in their situation).

Hey my back really hurts, and i was wondering if anyone knew any good stretches for it? Please explain what you do too, and believe me i give all fives! Thanks

Here is a link that has a whole bunch of stretches (just click on "back" in the top right area of the screen)
http://www.dcdoctor.com/pages/rightpages_wellnesscenter/homeexercises/homeexercise_main.html

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