about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
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Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

I've been with my current boyfriend for almost two months now, and he's a really nice guy, and he is very thoughtful and emotional. I just don't think there's much of a connection between us. I've had a few other boyfriends before, and whenever I am with him, I don't feel the way I think I should...I don't feel attracted to him, I guess is what I'm saying. But I feel guilty dumping him because he is an amazing boyfriend. He buys the best presents and says the sweetest things to me. So, I'm wondering, is it worth it to dump him and hope someone that makes me feel the way I think I should comes along? Or should I just be happy with what I have?

Too often, teenagers find one thing they are unhappy with in a relationship, and they break it off. Now, I'm not perfect, and I've done the same thing.

I think you should wait it out for a bit. You said he's a good boyfriend, and it's perfectly natural to feel a little loss of connection or no connection at all. Try doing new things or having new conversations. Switch up the routine, and maybe you'll find that there IS a connection, you just haven't found it yet.

But don't be too quick to give up hope. I'd say if after a few more months, you honestly don't feel much of a connection, talk with him about it. Maybe he doesn't feel the same thing? You never know unless you COMMUNICATE! =]

--Jack
(17/m)

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I, too, find it annoying how everyone is obsessing over Twilight. Then I read it. So don't hate on me, I can't help it. I'm surprised no one else has asked this. But all of a sudden, I've basically given up on dating. I don't want ANYONE but Edward Cullen. What to doooo? Don't tell me he's just a fictional character :/ Give me hope :/

Haha you sound like lots of teenage girls.

But honestly, Edward Cullen isn't even THAT romantic. I've read all the books and seen the movie. And I've seen more romantic things before.

But there are SO many great guys out there that I really think you shouldn't give up hope until you've at least tried.

And if you think about it, you're never going to get Edward Cullen unless any of the following occurs:

a. Stephenie Meyer didn't make him up, and he wasn't actually a dream of her's. She actually met him.

b. Someone invents a way for characters to come out of books and live.

c. A fictional character falls in love with YOU out of the millions of teenage girls [and possibly boys] who also think he's theirs.


I honestly don't mean to be rude, I mean to let you know that there are so many guys out there TEN TIMES better than Edward Cullen. You just gotta look.

--Jack
(17/m)

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13/f
Does anyone konw any blogging websites for teenagers that are simple, but not too young?

Here's what I know:

blogger.com
wordpress.com
Blogspot.com
LiveJournal.com
Xanga.com
Myspace.com
deadjournal.com


My favorite is Word Press xDD

--Jack
(17/m)

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13/f
Does anyone know any good websites for females or males around the ages of 13-16 besides myspace, facebook, imvu, msn, hi-5 etc...
If it helps I like websites where I can meet new people, where I can have a profile (talk about myself) and even dress-up games are fun too.

You'll probably hate this answer, but I must give it.

Honestly, my answer has to be Advicenators.com. Why? Well either you know about a whole different side of this website or you don't.

It's the forums, I mean. This will sound so stupid to you, but I've met some of my best friends on here, or at least, people I see myself talking to for a very long time.

Like my friend Laura. I'll admit I've never seen her in person, but I feel as if I know her better than most of my friends. We're often completing each others' sentences and agreeing on most everything. We've talked on the phone like.. twice, but I see myself talking to her for as long as I can, and I see myself actually meeting her in person one day. I would have never imagined I'd do that, but hey, I have and I want to.

So what I mean to say is, I've gotten to know her through the forums on here. Every person has their own personal forum, and you can meet some really great people. If you want your forum link, I'll give it to you if you respond with your column name.

Here's my forum link if you want to stop by:

http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=30323

Other than that, there's friendster.com but I've never used it.

--Jack
(17/m)

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Iam a 19 year old female and lately for some reason I don't know why one minute i'll be all smiles and laughing and then the next minute i'll be crying as hard as i can cry. Then when I try to go to sleep I can't sleep becouse I have so much going around in my head untill I can't sleep;.Also every little thing seems to make me mad no matter how small it is. I don't know what to do what's wrong with me?

Either you're just a normal teenager or you have the beginnings of bipolar disorder.

But I am certainly not a doctor and I cannot diagnose you.

What I suggest is try to control your emotions yourself, and if that doesn't work, go see a doctor, because maybe they can help?

--Jack
(17/m)

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I think Im over him but Im not sure... Somedays I can't stop thinking about him.. Somedays I don't think about him.. How do I knw If I am REALLY over him??

For the first few months after a break up, you will continually think about him.

After time, you'll stop thinking about him. If after like 5 or 6 months and you're still thinking about him, then you're probably not over him yet.

But it's perfectly normal to have days you think about him, and days you don't.

It should go away, though.

--Jack
(17/m)

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is there any good way to tell someone you like them without straight up saying i like you? i think it would just be random, and i'm 18 and have never told ANYONE ive liked them before but i've decided i need to tell this boy. i've liked him for three years now !! its a confusing situation but i just dont want to be random about it so id like to know how people have told others they've liked them, and how it worked out :) thanks!

Coming from a guy, maybe this will help you decide how to go about this.

Guys HATE when girls are secretive and mysterious about things like this. Sure, some like it because it means there's a "chase", but most guys would rather a girl just flat out said "I like you", because playing mind games may just piss them off or confuse them.

So you'll have the best chance of some reciprocation if you just flat out tell him. So what if he doesn't like you back? So what if it's embarrassing? If you never step out of your comfort zone, you'll never get anywhere in life. It has to start somewhere ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year! =]

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okayy i really like this guy and he knows i liek him but some people say that he does liek me and some people say he doesnt.... and i reaaly want to find out if he doesn or dosent i know everyone thinks that i should just go up to him in person and ask him but i cant do that...... what do i do?
thanks
loveboys

I'm going to give you a list of what guys tend to do when they like girls:

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.

If you like this guy- and he does all or most of those things- my best bet is that he does like you. That means one and only one thing: Ask him to make sure, and then try the relationship out. Who knows- it could be great!


--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year! =]

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ok so my friend likes my best guy friend and last night on new years me and my guy friend hooked up and i kind of like him and he said he likes me too but i am trying to keep it a secret from my friend because shes gonna be SO pissed if she finds out but i know that my guy friend really doesnt like her because he told me so i have no idea what to do now .. does it make me a bad person if i did that?

This is something that really pisses me off. Not you, your friend.

She isn't dating this kid, and there is absolutely NOTHING wrong if you like the kid, too.

No, you're not a bad person. I guess if you promised your friend you wouldn't get close to the kid, and then you did, then you may be a bad person, but if you didn't promise anything to her, then there's nothing wrong.

--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year! =]

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I just got an iPod, and I'm realizing how much it costs to buy songs. It's so expensive, so I'm wondering, does everyone buy there songs like this and pay full price for each song? Everyone has so many songs but I don't see how because they're so expensive. I'm not looking for a way around this, I just want to know if the majority of people actually do it this way.

Here's normally what I do.

If a friend has a CD I want, I ask to borrow it, or I have them send it to me over the internet.

If I want a specific song, I use FrostWire. Which is NOT illegal. It's only illegal if you share your music.

www.frostwire.com

Less viruses than LimeWire.

Other than that, I just use Zamzar to get videos off of YouTube.

In my entire life, I've bought 2 CDs: The Rocket Summer and Relient K.

--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year!

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which one's easier... ACT or SAT??

I haven't taken the SAT, and I'm going to take the ACT in two months.

I did take a practice ACT, and that was honestly not THAT bad, it was just bad not having the breaks.

I had a lot of friends take the PSAT, and they all said it was really easy. So, I don't know if that means anything to you.

But it shouldn't matter which is easier. It depends on which school you want to go to. Check it out, and then only take the test you have to take. It will save you enough money for a single book in college.

--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year! =]

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We have been together 10 months. After 3 months we told each other we love each other. 2 days ago he told me he didn't know whether or not he was in love with me anymore. he still wants to be with me, and let me just say that saying i'm madly in love with him is an understatement. should we end it or wait this out?

Wait it out. You're only teenagers. Love is something that's hard to comprehend and hard to grasp.

So wait it out. Let him sort out his feelings without pressure.

--Jack
(17/m)

Happy New Year! =]

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My school has a winter formal coming up. The thing is, I go to a private, all girls school. Not many of my friends have guy friends, and the ones that do are already setting some people up. I really want to go. I'm a junior and haven't been to a dance yet (my old school only had homecoming). Anyway, there's a guy from work I've been thinking of asking. The problem is, I don't know when or how to ask him. I talk to him, not a ton though. One of my friends said it would be creeping if I just out of the blue asked him to the dance, but then she changed her mind and said it wouldn't be. What do you think? Another thing, I'm afraid of people at work finding out. It's not that I'm embarrassed, it would just be awkward and they would be asking questions and whatever. I'm really shy, never had a boyfriend, so doing this would be stepping completely out of my comfort zone, which is something I really want to do. What do you think? How should I ask him? I don't want it to be like in the break room when everyone is around, and while we're working, there's people around and it would be awkward to ask. I was thinking of getting his number first, and asking him from there. How should I go about getting it? Any ideas? The dance is at the end of January. Thanks!

You don't HAVE to go to the dance with someone ;]

But I would just ask him. If you don't talk to him much, say maybe you can get to know each other more if you go together.

I don't know, I can't really plan out a conversation for you to have, because I have no idea who the guy is, and I have no idea how he'll respond.

You definitely should step outside of your comfort zone because if you don't, you're never going to meet new people or do new things. Just go for it. Seriously, so what if people at work ask about you two, and so what if he says no. It isn't the end of the world, because there are so many other things out there that are much worse than that.

Sorry, I don't mean to be harsh.

Thanks for inboxing ;]
--Jack
(17/m)

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hey so you seem really enthusiastic for inbox questions, so here you go :) (and i'll leave good feedback!)

it is a boy problem (as always) but i know, personally, that everytime i get one of these questions, i'm like, "omgg it's not that hard. if you like him, TALK TO him!" but it's difficult for me now because i'm in a problematic situation that intertwines with friendship trouble.

in a nutshell, i like a guy and we're pretty good friends, but my problem is, i get WAY too jealous. like it's crazy. my entire day gets ruined if any sort of girl talks to him or touches him (playfully). like this happens in several classes.

for instance, in one of my classes, he sits in front of me and sometimes he talks to my "best friend" (used to be but ever since she got a boyfriend, things have changed) who inadvertently flirts with him although she's dating his best friend. and she'll be like, "ohh, _____, ha ha ha you're so funny" and i'll give her the death stare and be sour for the rest of the period. and i feel bad about it but i just get soo bitter cause i'm so jealous.

and in another class, he sits way up front from me and sits next to this other girl, and i don't know if she likes him or not or visa versa but they're always in groups together and what not. sometimes he talks to me though.

all in all, i highly doubt he's looking for a girlfriend right now, but i just want to get closer with him. he's soo nice sometimes. like a few days ago, this guy asked to borrow my highligher and then today when i asked for it back he said he left it at home, and my crush was like, "yo if you jacked her highligher ima mess you up" and i was like hahah awww. and he calls me several times a week for homework help and i always help him as much as i can even though he's smarter than me. i think he calls me more than my "best friend" since she's so busy.

i didn't think i would really like him since we're in the exact same circle of friends, and there are lots of connections and problems and such, but...

1. what should i do?

i can't call him and be like, "yeah i just called to talk" cause usually we talk about school (actually i can't recall a time when we haven't, although i'm sure i've just been like, "so how are things?") but i love when he says my name and just aah. but my "best friend" is a little more in on his life and extracurricular activities, whereas i'm not.

2. would it be weird if i talked to my "best friend"'s boyfriend who is best friends with my crush? (it's like the four of us plus a few other people who make up the circle of friends) i am afraid my "best friend"'s boyfriend will tell my best friend but i want to ask him how far my crush has gone with a girl without being weird about it. but he will think it's weird. should i just not talk to him about it? we're pretty close and all, my 'best friend"'s boyfriend and i.

and what are your general thoughts of the situation? like he's not PRUDE; he calls girls hot and stuff but last year three or four girls liked him and he didn't go out with a single one. he's definitely not a hot shit pimp kind of guy -- he's really sweet and kind-hearted. like a girl's best friend ought to be. but that's why i'm attracted to him. also i think him calling other girls hot also caused me to like him cause it's like, i want him to think I'M hot, you know?

AND I AM NOT TELLING HIM THAT I LIKE HIM unless we hang out alone or something. our entire friendship would be ruined. it's okay for me to flirt cause nothing is ever for sure, but pleasee don't suggest "tell him or he'll never know." and we never hang out alone -- it's always with that circle of friends. and i am upset with everyone in that circle except my crush and his best friend, who is my "best friend"'s boyfriend.

thank you soo much. ps i'm 15f.

take your time to respond -- i'd rather you take a few days and give a thorough answer than rush to answer an inbox question and do it half-heartedly. you'll get a five just for reading this, but i'll try to be detailed with my feedback.

First of all, thanks for inboxing, and I'm really sorry it's taken me more than just a few days to respond; it's been a busy holiday! =]

Anyway...

1. Suggest hanging out just the two of you, or maybe if you have to get in a group in class, try to be in his group. Really it doesn't have to be much, just try to get to know him better with time. Like you're not going to be able to become good friends overnight ;].

2. Ehh, it'd be weird, but maybe that's just me. If you feel comfortable doing that, that's fine, but honestly I don't see a point in finding out "how far" he's gone with a girl. Won't that just fuel your jealousy?! ;]

My general thoughts on the situation? I think you shouldn't let jealousy get to you as much as it's seeming to. Next time you become jealous, just remind yourself that you two aren't dating, so there's really nothing you can do about it, as rude as that may sound.

Basically, try hanging out with him AWAY from your circle of friends. And really, if they aren't being your friends, then you shouldn't be hanging out with them.

--Jack
(17/m)

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15/f

ok i have a problem .. the problem is that i have no best friends .. i mean i have one best friend thats a guy and i have no best friends that are girls .. and a girl needs to have her girlfriends to tell everything to and talk to about things that you normally wouldnt talk to with guys about .. but im a sophomore in high school and i feel like all the groups of friends have been formed and i feel like kind of on the outside.. i mean i actually do have a lot of friends im not a loser or anything its just i dont have like one or two REALLY good best friends that i would be able to tell anything to .. and the problem with my best guy friend is that one of my friends likes him so everytime we hang out alone it looks suspicious to her that i like him or something but i dont were just best friends .. i just dont know what to do because i feel like when my guy friend hangs out with his guys and i dont reallly have girls to hang with and when i do hang out with some of my girl friends its seems like its not that fun because its not a usual thing where were so close that we are comfortable telling each other a lot of stuff... help pleasee

Hey, first off, thanks for inboxing! =]

My only advice to you is to join a club or sport or something.

Like do the school plays, or join Key Club, or start a club, or something.

Why I'm saying this is because when you spend a lot of time with people in a common club or group gathering, you start to become better friends. I know for a fact some of the best friends I've met have been because of the school plays, and they'll be some of the people I actually care to talk to after high school.

--Jack
(17/m)

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Ive been experimenting with weed and i have these weird panic/anxiety attacks... what can i do to prevent that from happening???

Yeah, just stop experimenting. That's what's going to happen if you keep getting high, and there really isn't a way to smoke pot and not feel like that. By that I mean for you. Because it is different for everyone, and obviously since that's how it's affecting you, it's going to keep happening like that unless you stop.

Want to know how I get high?

Enjoying life.

--Jack
(17/m)

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Over the summer, this guy and i were friends with benefits. i know friends with benefits are never a good thing but anyway.. a friend of mine told me he had been dating someone. So i stopped talking to him to get him out of the picture. Well, i haven't talked to him in about 2 months and he texted me tonight saying that he missed me and how he wanted me to come over soon. I don't miss him, just doing things with him. I asked him about his girlfriend and he just said "yeaaah we can keep it between us" so i said umm ill think about it. so should i do it? i don't know the girl at all that hes dating so i wouldnt feel bad at all about that.

Personally, I don't think getting involved with someone who is already with someone is the best thing to do, but if you want to do it, who is stopping you?

--Jack
(17/m)

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15/f

Well me and this guy ive been going out with for 3 months already had sex for the first time after the 3rd week . Is that too soon?

Plain and simple, yes.

Having sex three weeks after you've been dating someone is too early.

I personally don't believe in sex until marriage, but if you're not going to do that, you should at least wait until either:

A. You're with the person you're 100% positive you'll be with for quite some time.
B. You've been dating for quite some time. And by that, I mean years, not months or weeks or days.

Next time, please think about what you do.

--Jack
(17/m)

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15/F

do guys see it trashy if a girl smokes weed, like at parties and stuff? Thanks :]

Actually yeah. And honestly, I think anyone that smokes weed is kind of trashy. If you were doing it at a party, that would just be even worse because I would be there to witness it.

Take it from someone who is level-headed: the guys worth looking for won't like a girl who smokes anything.

--Jack
(17/m)

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honestly tell me if im fat,
raelly, if you say i am i wont get mad, but anyways if you did, i couldnt care less because i really want honest opinions.

http://s474.photobucket.com/albums/rr105/minamala11/

click both pics

Nope, not at all. =]

--Jack
(17/m)

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