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Guy with girlfriend wants to cheat.
Over the summer, this guy and i were friends with benefits. i know friends with benefits are never a good thing but anyway.. a friend of mine told me he had been dating someone. So i stopped talking to him to get him out of the picture. Well, i haven't talked to him in about 2 months and he texted me tonight saying that he missed me and how he wanted me to come over soon. I don't miss him, just doing things with him. I asked him about his girlfriend and he just said "yeaaah we can keep it between us" so i said umm ill think about it. so should i do it? i don't know the girl at all that hes dating so i wouldnt feel bad at all about that.
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Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
Personally, I don't think getting involved with someone who is already with someone is the best thing to do, but if you want to do it, who is stopping you?
--Jack
(17/m)
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okay i know many people have answered this but this is like exactly what i have been going through for a long time now. this guy, we hooked up but didn't have sex or anything. well i've always liked him but he has a girlfriend of two and a half years. he has always wanted to hook up with me, and of course i wanted to because i can't resist the damn kid, but in my mind i knew that it wasn't right. i was stuck inbetween. i know what your thinking, if he wants to why not? right? thats what i was thinking too, if he is willing to and i don't like his girlfriend anyway then who cares. but then i realized i couldn't let myself do it anymore. i asked him why he was still with her if he was trying to hook up with me still and he said he would feel too bad breaking up with her and all this bullshit which in my head meant..RED FLAG. i also ended up telling him i couldn't do anything while he was going out with her, even though i wanted to SO bad and so he told her he wanted to go on a break with her. he then thought he could get with me, and again i had doubts because i knew what was running through his mind, and that was hooking up with me and then getting back with his girl. i wasn't going to put myself through that, i even told him that i couldn't do anything while they were on a break and he said why not? and i told him because i don't want to be put in that situation, and he didn't understand which clearly meant there was going to be nothing more between us, and he just wanted to mess around with me. that was not okay with me, at all. everytime i see him, i can't resist him but i have to know that i'm better than that. i'm not going to just let someone use me, i'm not going to give him what he wants. he wants me and her and you know what, i'm going to show him he cant have two things at once. honestly, i don't want you to get hurt like i did. i'm still trying to deal with the whole situation, i know what your going through. i know what it feels like being stuck inbetween. it's like your heart knows that its wrong but your mind is telling you its okay, and that you should do it. if you want to talk about anything else, or more of your situation don't be scared to e-mail me at: lindsayluxo@yahoo.com
goodluck sweetie, i know you'll make the right decision. be smart and strong :) ♥ LU
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Because you don't know the girl you wouldn't feel bad about slutting it up with her boyfriend? Is that your logic?
Emphasis on the word slut, here.
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This SAME THING happened to me, and it broke my heart completely and ruined a solid year of my life. You must know that he is planning to use you. And he won't leave his gf for you. They NEVER do. And look at how he's cheating w/his girlfriend.. he might have TONS of other girls he sleeps with and does stuff with that you don't know about. Since he has no problem screwing over his gf, he'll have NO problem lying to you or hurting you. I'd hate to see anyone go through the same thing I went through. Please, I'm begging you, stay away from him.
This guy sounds so much like the guy I used to be involved with, I wouldn't be surprised if it was the same douchebag.
Please be safe and careful.
-K
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Honestly, i think thats kindof wrong. the fact that he has a girlfriend and wants to fool around with you is stupid. although you dont know her but how would you feel if you liked someone alot and they cheated on you? man, his poor girlfriend.
maybe you should just stop with him.
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I would definitely suggest you not do it. First of all for respect for the other girl. Getting cheated on would hurt so bad..dont knowingly fool around with a guy who has a girlfriend.
The next reason is for your own self respect and dignity. This guy views you just for fooling around and its not like he wants you enough to leave his current girl for you. You desserve more than to have to remain a secret.
Next is the whole drama that can come with it. I know people who are married/have kids etc who are fooling around with their coworkers and it really just becomes a mess. Someone develops feelings for the other..the other person finds out they are being cheated on, it just brings a lot of drama and hurt feelings.
You desserve more than this and I hope I helped out a little.
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friends with benefits always become complicated when theres more then two people involve good thing you have no feelings for this guy.obviously he has no respect for girls his treating you like your a sex object i dont know if you up for that but, what about the other girl think she has feelings too things like that can really distroy people .how would you feel if you really liked a guy and found out he was messing around with another girl.think before you act if i were you i would just ignore him.
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He doesn't miss you either babe, he missing fooling around with you. Don't buy into his lame-ass flattery. He wants exactly what you want: No strings attatched hooking up behind his girlfriends back.
And NO! No of course you shouldn't do it! This guy doesn't like you or respect you, he just knows he can get some. He's a douche, and doing this with him doesn't make you a very nice person either. You aren't a moron, you already know that!
But what the hell, since you both just want random hook-ups and neither of you give a rat-ass about his girlfriend, go ahead. At least you are on the same page.
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Quite honestly if you know he has a girlfriend, that is just abad idea, altogether.
1.) He won't tell her so obvisouly he is just using you.
2.) Think of how hurt she would be if she found he was cheating on her with you.
and 3.) What if you were the girlfriend, how would you feel being cheated on? You probably wouldn't like it.
I know you may miss doing stuff with him but sex can be really degrading, would you rather just be fwb or would you rather find a great guy out there who loves you for your personality rather then your body?
You deserve great things, so next time he calls you or whatever think about that and how his g/f would feel. I've seen friends get cheated on, its not nice, and it does hurt. Please think of that b4 you do anything.
Good luck,
<3 Jeannie :)
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