Erinn_the_bamf's advice column

They typically cost about $150-200. You can find them at almost any salon or beauty store. Except conair because they only sell their crap straighteners there.

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I would like teenagers to answer this one,

My daughter is 13. But the clothes she wears are not...happy. She always is sarcastic. She listens to strange, loud music. Is this the fashion these days? Should I let her be?

Yep, that's pretty much the style. It's called "emo" short for emotional. You can tell her what you like, but, she won't change. It'll probably make her want to rebel more. Everyone's into anarchy now-a-days. The sarcasisim comes naturally with any teenager no matter how they dress. In time she'll grow out of it.

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hey...did anyone notice...that the new "in" thing is acting ghetto? last year,it wasnemo rock whatever....now its ghetto...what the heck? why cant people be original and now follow the crowd? how can i not follow ANY crowd? everyone in my school follows the trends...and im just there,i want to stick out ina good way...any way i could do that? thanks...also...are you with me on this?

Here it's emo. Which I don't mind because I like the music. But yeah it's annoying. Don't want to follow any crowd? Make up a new crowd. Start shopping at stores no one's heard of start wearing clothes that are cute and unknown. Maybe, try dressing from a different era. It would be different.

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Ok so here is the problem I have a serious crush on this boy let's call him Kyle. I am 14 so it's not just some stupid little kid thing, and no he isn't super popular. He's just there. He's always teasing me he likes to call me a turuturu. (they are cute little made up creatures) The main problem is I know he doesn't like me as more than a friend because he's gay. I keep telling myself I don't have a chance with him because he's gay but I can't get over him. What should I do?

My friend Ash is helping me with this one. I wanted to give her credit =].

Honestly, you can only be friends with him. If he's gay nothing will change his mind. However are you sure he's gay? Make sure before you jump to any conclusions. I'm sorry.

But a good way to get over him is to find someone else. Yes, it will be hard but it's the only thing you can do

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In your opinion, how old should a girl at least be before she has her first kiss? 4th graders dog-drooling all over each other's chins don't count.

To me, no early than 12. Anywhere after that is fine.

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okay you know how some people say you're lighter when you weigh yourself in the morning?? is that true?? i was wondering what your real weight was..like in the morning er in the afternoon/day because i noticed when i weigh myself in the morning i weigh less than at night.

thanks!!

The closest to your exact weight is your weight in the morning. As you eat more throughout the day you "gain" a little more weight but it's just extra energy that usually comes right off.

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Ok this Sat.im going to a semi formail dance with my best friend. But here's the thing .. idk how to slow dance, ive never done it before. What do you do? And where should I be looking, in his eyes, or just like around. Im soooo confused , pleaseee help. PS, i really like him so im prob. gonna be nervous

You put your arms around his neck. He'll put his arms around your waist. You slowly move side to side. I'd say look in his eyes if you like him. Yeah, it's OK to be nervous that's normal. It's not OK to no dance with him just because you're nervous.

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hey iam sally iam 15 yrs old 1st i met a guy on the net each day i get to love him more and more well so did he.u can say i loved him like hell we had the same felling. i cant let a day go past without talking to him he was my life my soul and everything after that i got rapped by a guy i dont know i told my bf everything he got so mad and worried anyway after that my sister called him and told him she is lying to u and i never thought that even i lie to him in 1 word so when he heard that he stopped talking to me and sending me emails....i miss him alot and i cant spend my life without him and i dont know what to do i need advice

Make a new e-mail account since he probably won't respond to e-mails you send him. Send him an e-mail explainning everything. Tell him you love him and cannot live without him. Say that your sister was lying and such. Be for forgivness. After that if he can't accept your apology then he isn't worth it.

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Okay I really like this guy, and I think hes gonna ask me out soon. However my parents say No Boyfriends whatsoever. I've had boyfriends plenty of times before but not ones that go over to each others houses and go to movies and stuff cause I've never been able to tell my parents about boyfriends. Now this guy that I like, is the type of boyfriend that yall hang out every day outside of school and I totally want that, But I don't know how to get my parents to approve of me having a boyfriend. Any ideas?

You have servral options:

The gay/just friends approach. You either lie and say he's gay or say you're just friends.

Group date approach. Go out with a ton of people. That won't know who's paired up with who so you can't get in trouble.

Honest approach. Tell them you have a boyfriend. If they cannot deal with that then they will have to adjust to it. You may get grounded from this but at least you tell the truth.

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ok, well im not trying to sound conceited(sp?), but i have very beautiful eyes. They are a bluish, greenish, greyish color. i often have random strangers come up to me and say I have beautiful eyes, and it makes me feel weird. I can't really describe the feeling, but sort of an awkwardness. I was sitting on the bleachers in gym the other day, and a girl walked up to me and said "wow you have nice eyes" i was a little shy...see the thing is, i like the feeling, but i dont at the same time. I don't want to sound conceited when I say thank you, but I dont want to sound embarrassed either, which is what I sound like. Can someone give me advice on how to feel more comfortable with strangers complimenting me on my eyes all the time? sorry its so long...ill rate high for good answers. ♥ Danielle

I know the feeling. I get complemented on my hair a lot and it feels awkward because I don't know these people. I just smile polietly and say thank you and that's it. Yes it's still a bit annoying but just saying that is the best thing to do.

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hey everybody. My friend was dating her bf for a year and a few months and they had already decided their wedding date, childrens names, where they would live, ect. They just recently "went on a break" and then broke up completely, but they are still going to get married, as planned, the summer after she graduates high school. I told them that if they can't be together in a dating relationship then how where they going to do in a marriage but to them this makes sense. What do you think about this?

Wow. Just wow. I think that's a bit more than weird. You are completely right. Your friend will be making a mistake. Unfortunatley, it isn't your place to decide. She needs to come to this realixation herself. You can voice your opinon but you can't bager her about it. Hopefully, she'll figure it out that if she can't even date him she's not gonna do well be married to him. But until then all you can do is support her.

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What are websites to places similar to Myspace? Like places where you can make a site and have people look at it and have their own?

Xanga
Live journal
Dead journal

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I gave up gossiping because apparently everyone thinks I have a problem with it and when I hear something, it's the hardest thing to keep my mouth shut! I haven't broken my vow yet, and I don't plan on it, as hard as it is. I have broken it past years with things like candy and complaining last year. I was just wondering, how many teens and young adults here find it hard to keep your vows for lent? Even if it's something simple like, sodas. Have y'all been able to keep your vows completely so far?

Well, this year my mom made me give something up that I didn't like anyway. But years in the past I've dealt with it. Think of it this way: let one secret out spend the rest of eternity in hell. It works for me if I think of it like that.

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how does someone get raped/kidnapped over myspacve? i dont reallt get it? is it even true?

Yes, it's true. My friend was actaully stalked because by someone she meet on myspce. He came to her house in the middle of the night and hid in their garage. Luckily, he didn't rape her or anything.

Anyway, this is what happens. Someone requests someone else and the person adds them. They get to talking. They decide to meet up someplace. The person who was requested gets raped/kidnapped/killed.

Or in my friend's case, she accidentaly gave out too much info. She tried to be as safe as she could but a stalker put the pieces of the puzzle together. So be safe and keep all your personal info a secret.

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Is it normal to start your period in gr.6? another question. If your start having periods in gr.6 and don't have one till gr.8 is the normal?

Yes, this is very normal. Most girls are irregular when they first start their period. It's actually kinda weird for me that I wasn't lol. But yeah it comes and goes at differnt times for the first one and a half years.

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my mom and dad are together. my mom is an alcoholic and my dad works full time. my sisters dysfuntional and my other sister is in college so i can never talk to her. i bond with my dad all the time over sports which i hate to play anyway i just do because if i dont ill be so fat & out of shape. i cant talk to my mom about anything because shes so ridiculously stupid and makes the most unreasonable excuses why she cant come to my games and stuff. now my sister had a baby and my parents are always paying attention to her and they dont give me the time of day. my grades in school have been dropping drastically and i cant afford a psychiatrist. any suggestions?

Try you school guidance consuler. Free and helpful. Sure most don't have a degree in psycology but they are helpful. Many have had hard experiences as children, therefore, they want to help you. Possibly ask them if they concil your family together.

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Hey, all you teen boys out there, I was wondering if any of you like horses or are involved with them. I'm just curious, it seems like it's too much of a girl thing for some reason. So I want to know if anyone knows any horse guys or if you are one yourself.

lol and I'm not looking for answers saying "horses are cool", because I want to see if anyone likes them more than "cool" and have actually done things with them.

I'm not a guy but my guy friend rides horses sometimes. Then again his family owns them so he has a reason.

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when do your boobs stop frowing..im 13

They stop growing persay around 18 or 19. But gaining weight can make them bigger. Also if you don't go completely back to yourself after pregnancy that makes them bigger. But they stop actually growing at 18/19.

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Ive been really good friends with a guy for like 10 years, ever since we were 5. Lately, idk we're talking a lot more and getting along really well. Hes going to a dance with me and seems really excited. I told him one of my Lenten goals was to go to stations of the cross every friday night, and tonight he showed up too. I talked to him after and hes like "Oh, I decided to copy you:)" When he saw me he got this big smile on his face. Now my friends think he likes me. I like him. Does he like me? And how can i let him no i like him without actually telling him?

It sounds like he really does like you. To show him you like him maybe you can start copying him too. Like do stuff he does just to see him. At the dance you are going to with him don't be afarid to get kinda close.

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ok, this friend of mine told me that this girl i really like deosnt like me but a friend of hers said she likes me , but shes afraid to hurt me if she brakes up with me. her friend said i should ask her out but my friend said i shouldnt. should i take the chance and listen to her friend and ask her out or not and listen to her friend?

Is your friend friends with her? I'm assuming that's a no. Therefore, he can't really know who she likes. I would trust her friend who really des know the correct info. Ask her out.

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