Anything more that a holding hands, a kiss and hug, can easily turn into a sexual situation. If you want to avoid sex, then stick with the basics. You won't keep a good reputation by being the make-out girl or the tease, and all guys brag and talk. Don't do anything you don't want getting around.

Luckily, guys are just so happy to have a girl approach them, that they could care less if she is cheesy. Just be friendly and fun. Smile and take it all lightly. When you appear comfortable and not shy, then it will make it easier for the guy to talk to you. If a silence is all you get back, then say, "Well it was really cool to meet you. Guess I will see you around." He may of not been interested or just too shy to talk. Don't write him off completely, but do move on to the next hottie.

It seems easy to just tell him, but it could backfire. She may deny ever telling you about the other guy and call you a liar. You could end up looking like the jealous ex-girlfriend trying to break them up just to be vindictive. They likely will break up on their own soon. It is up to you whether or not you want to take a chance and also to decide if you just want him to not date your friends or maybe want him back. I personally would not chance it just to get them back. I might talk to him if I realized that he was the guy for me and breaking up was a big mistake. Good luck!

If you have chosen to wait until you marry the girl of your dreams, then you will have to have the self-control to stick with it. It really does not matter if you end up marrying the girl you have in mind or someone you have not met yet. What matters is having integrity to do what is right for you. Temptation never goes away, and some people think marriage will mean that it will be easier to be faithful, because you are having sex all the time. Well, this is not the case.
All people need to develop self-control in order to stand up against various temptations that threaten what they hold dear. Smokers are tempted by cigarettes, even though they know it will put their very lives at increased risk. Whether it is sex, gambling, food, spending...whatever the temptation, we all need to remember what is at stake; which, is usually more precious then the cheap and temporary satistaction of giving in...that can leave you feeling like you let yourself down most of all.

The previous answers listed the stores to try and that is great. I'll just add that your clothes should fit, and not be too tight or too loose. Both extremes will make you look bigger. One button jackets usually fit a large bust well. Try to wear heels on your shoes, if you can walk in them without killing yourself. Go light when you layer and avoid any bulky fabrics. Dark denim jeans are slimming and try different styles including flared and straight leg fits. Avoid tapered leg fit and loose fit. V neck tops are great for deemphasizing busts and drawing the eye up, as long as you are not showing cleavage. Wear a camisole or thin tank under deeper V shirts. Wear vertical stripes, never horizontal. Walk tall and keep good posture...an instant visual slimmer! Skirts should fall just above or below your knee. Too long or short is unflattering. Avoid shoes that look heavy and chunky...they visually weigh you down and make you appear heavier. Keep neat and polished and your overall appearence will be pleasing to the eye, no matter what your size. Jewelry and purses should be a little bigger if you don't want to look like you stole a kid's accessories. Do wear very long earrings and necklaces, which are slimming, because they draw the eye up and down and not horizontally. Just stay away from too chunky of jewelry. Dark rich colors in hues that flatter your coloring will flatter, also.

Could be a migraine. Talk to your doctor to know for sure. If it is a migraine, you are supposed to avoid light and noise and lay in a quiet room. Some natural food stores have things to try. If it worsens or becomes frequent, definately see a doctor.

If you are underage and living at home and your parents are hard core against gays, I would consider waiting to tell them. They may make your life hell, otherwise. If you are over 18 and or living on your own, then tell them straight up. Bring a friend for support if you need to, or tell them over the phone. It is not anything bad, so their reaction is their choice.

At the point he asked you out again, what did you tell him? If you were truthful about not wanting to date him, it should already be clear. If you gave him a wishy washy excuse, of course he still thinks he has a chance. Tell him that you don't want to date him. That is clear and he will not bug you again.

You said that the reason you don't want to date X is because it will hurt him, but you don't mind telling him it won't work out, IF you decide it goes well with Y. Sounds like you are already hurting and using X, by cheating on him and lying to him, and keeping him around in case the other guy does not work out. Does that sound nice? You either want to be with him or you don't. It should not depend on a secret date going well or not. My advice is to be honest with everyone, including yourself.

I am sorry for your loss, and for your grandma's condition. It is scary to lose people we love. Why did you lose friends this year? Maybe a move? You need to make new friends, and keep in touch with the old ones if possible. Everyone needs friends, especially during rough times. Find a relative or even a teacher to talk to if no one else is available at the moment. Make sure to express all your feelings, and not bottle them up. Writing about this could be a good thing for you. Love & Prayers for Gram.

Don't bother making a big deal out of this, or you could end up losing friends and driving yourself crazy. If you want to keep a secret, then don't tell anyone. If you want to find who the gossip is, then here is the plan. Tell three friends three different "secrets" at different times. Now we don't want to make you into a fibber, but if you can tell them silly little things and call them secrets, you will soon find out who can't keep her mouth shut. The point is not to call her on it and start a fight, but just to know who you will refrain from telling the next time. Some people gossip not to be mean, but because they are not mature enough to handle the temptation. We have all done, so don't be too harsh on her.

I don't know why, but maybe your mom feels like you have yourself together, but the sister needs her more. Sometimes parents seem to favor the kid that is actually the loser. They try to overcompensate for past guilt of not parenting well enough, or take the kid's personal failings as a sign that they need to help that child more. It is never fair to the other kids, but a shepherd always leaves the flock to search for the lost sheep. Is your sister more needy? It may be about guilt more than preference. Don't ignore it, but don't let it be more powerful than it need be. Your mom should be told how you feel, and you should not put up with coming in second place. Tell your mom that you understand that she feels that your sister is demanding and needy, but that it is not an excuse for her to treat you badly. Remind her that you still need her love and attention, too. If she is not responsive, then I feel for you, but I want you to know that you will be better off not always fighting for the attention or approval of someone that does not deserve your respect and time.

The media shoves sex at you everywhere you go, and you are at an age where your hormones are on overload as well. This means that almost anywhere you go, something will remind you that you are a sexual being and it does not take much to get you going. This is normal. Now part of growing up and becoming an adult is learning how to control our impulses (sexual and non-sexual) and to see the whole picture. Remember that television often depicts fantasy and not reality, so what you see is a lot of play-acting. If you stick with reality and limit the amount of time you spend in fantasy land, then your own sense of self will become clearer. Getting a date in order to have sex of any kind is not realistic or respectful. Dating is about getting to know and enjoy someone as a person and exchanging ideas. Of course we all have attractions, but that does not mean we should objectify and use someone to satisfy our curiousity. Fantasies are fun, but once trasferred to reality, they lose their magic. Many people find out too late, that the experience did not live up to the fantasy and that reality and consequences can leave you with big regrets. I know this is a lot to handle, but try to use that other big organ...your brain, and entertain yourself with the wonderful reality of your life. If you choose to overstimulate yourself with fantasy, you are choosing to enslave yourself to your obsessions. Satisfaction will not come from overindulgence. My advice is to cut out the junk food t.v. and get to know yourself better, before you attempt to live out your fantasies. Sexuality is something that we are born with, but like any part of our character, needs to be developed in a healthy environment to reach maturity. Along the way, we are taught different things by different people. Sometimes there are so many options, that we don't even know where to begin. Begin within yourself, and don't look for definitions from others.

If they wanted your advice, they would already be asking you, whether or not it was online or in person. They may not want you and the world to know their business. The site works, because it is ANONYMOUS, so let your friends be. Trust is not something to ask for, it is given.

Why is it that a guy can simultaneously like a hundred girls, and a girl automatically thinks she has to like one guy and it is do or die if he does not like just her, back? Yes, that is a rhetorical question. Maybe it is in our genes to be more loyal or we bought into the cinderella story of one prince coming to rescue us. Well, until you put that fantasy away...at least until you have a commitment and a ring on your finger, don't expect so much and more importantly don't GIVE so much. Girls become to focused and narrow in our hunt for the perfect guy...which of course does not exist. The guys just put out the vibe to any cute chick they see and hope that at least a few will take the bait. Your crush is not going to stop flirting or enjoying himself. You are not getting mixed signals. He likes flirting with girls...you included. Unless the two of you make a commitment to date and flirt only with each other (good luck with that), ease up on him. You should be doing the same thing. He does not deserve your exclusive devotion, when he is not giving the same to you. Start enjoying your youth and life as a free single gal while you can. He may see you in a different light when he realizes that you are attracting more than just his attentions. In the meantime, you won't waste another day waiting for him to propose.

Either he is confused about his own feelings or immature or both. Don't let him treat you like that when he is around his friends and then reward him with your friendship when the two of you are alone. He needs to make up his mind and you need him to treat you better or not at all. A good time to talk to him about this is when he and you are alone and he is trying to be nice.

Cut off all contact? No way! You have high standards and that is not a bad thing, until you start expecting them from others. We all are busy, and that is never an excuse, but she really does not need to keep apologizing for being who she is. Even if she is a little flaky, she still loves to hang out with you. Don't drive her away with wasting what time you do get-together by trying to guilt her with your hurt feelings. She is not you, she is a person with different strengths and weaknesses...no better, but no worse either. Do not take her flakiness personally! What if everyone took all your human flaws personally and did not want to hang with you, because you did not measure up. You need to make a decision. Choose to hang on to hurt feelings, and lose a good friend, or accept her for who she is, flakiness and all and let her off the high pedastal of who you wish she was. You and she will have a lot more fun when you do get-together!

If he wears a condom like he should then there won't be any...but you should not be having sex with anyone that thinks that your virginity is something to complain about. What an immature jerk! Your virginity is special and so are you. Don't waste any sexual experience on someone that does not appreciate and love you 100%!!! Wait awhile and you will have no regrets. Better guys always come along...that is a promise!!!

If you want the color of your eyes to pop, and not just fade into the background, you use the opposite color. That way the color of your eyes, and NOT your make-up will stand out. You will look natural, but better, and not too made-up. Try bronze, brown, taupe, smoky plum, peach, and a shimmery soft vanilla for right under the eye-brow. A soft but bright blush looks most natural on the apples of your cheeks...brighter colors actually look lighter on! Try bright coral or red...go bright and apply light! Lipstick should not be more than a soft tinted gloss during the day, and guys usually hate heavy lipstick in particular. Keep it a light glossy color. You can blot your lipstick with a tissue, and apply a coat of vaseline with your finger. A lot of professionals still use vaseline...it just works. Keep that nice hair in good shape with regular trims, and wash it enough to never go with greasy hair...nothing is worse! If you wear mascara, just do a single clean coat on the top lashes in dark brown and try a curling mascara to really open up the eyes. Have fun!

Yes, that is a possibility. Absence and time apart will make it clear whether or not two people miss each other or like being apart more. If you get back with him, refrain from such drastic measures, unless you really mean it.

"Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable. To say something you value deeply to another and to have him or her value it equally by listening to it carefully and apppreciatively is the most universal way of exchanging social interest or demonstrating affection." David Augsburger, CARING ENOUGH TO HEAR AND BE HEARD.


All sincere persons will be given thoughtful examination and reply. Please be specific about your situation as it applies to your question, the applicable information and facts necessary for me to properly assess your situation and give you the benefit of my knowledge and experience, which includes: experience/education with mentoring, relationship study, self help, spirituality, poetry, literature, philosophy, psychology, color theory, teaching, parenting, and debate that will be used to your advantage. I am concerned with offering an objective and realistic perspective more than ratings, because this will help YOU. Artificial sweetness is found in diet soda, not in my advice. If you feel that I did not understand your question or need more specifics to help, please let me know, but while all truth is subjective, questioners should be mature enough to hear answers not necessarily agreed with. If you are only looking for someone to tell you just what you want to hear, then you may not be ready for my advice. I believe in personal responsibility, self and other awareness and your power and ability to recreate and redirect your own life. All our misery and joy begins and ends within ourselves, but our willingness to be open can bring the positive or negative energy we seek. If you or someone you know is open to positive help, the resources and caring individuals needed are available now.

http://www.coolnurse.com/

http://www.4woman.gov/violence/

http://www.childhelpusa.org/about/programs-and-services/childhelp-national-child-abuse-hotline-1-800-4-a-child

drug/alcohol abuse help go here: http://www.4drugabuse.com/addiction-treatment.html

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/1800-273-TALK(8255)
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. If you need help, please dial 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With over 120 crisis centers across the country, our mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential. -----------------------------------

http://www.kidscrisis.com/

http://www.teenadviceonline.org/gethelp/numbers.html

You can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline, operated by RAINN, 24 hours a day, free & confidential. 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

For info. on birth control etc.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/

The Girls and Boys Town National Hotline is the only hotline that children and parents can call with any problem at any time:
Open 24-hours a day, every day at 1-800-448-3000

Spanish-speaking counselors available; translation services for 100+ languages

TTY line available for the hearing-impaired at 1-800-448-1833

Counselors can help find services and agencies in the callers' local community

Help at the End of the Line
Callers talk to highly-trained, professional counselors who listen and give "right now" answers. They're sympathetic people who have expertise dealing with these and other problems:

depression

suicide

running away

parenting problems

relationship concerns

physical, sexual, and emotional abuse

chemical dependency

mental health

anger

aggressive behavior

Toll Free
Operated by Father Flanagan's Boys' Home, hotline services are free of charge to every parent and child in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, U.S. territories, and Canada.

Toll-Free: 1-800-448-3000

http://www.sex-ed101.org/links.html

http://www.anorexicweb.com/anorexicweb.html

Report Child Abuse
Childhelp USA National Child Abuse Hotline
1-800-4-A-CHILD TDD: 1-800-2-A-CHILD



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All our motivations stem from two: Love or Fear. When in turmoil or indecision, ask yourself from which of these you are acting. If you want an honest response outside of yourself, you need to first be honest within yourself. Bless you on your journey!

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