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Q: Hey, my boyfriend loves massages and i was thinking that for valentines day, id get him like a massage or something. We've been together for almost 2 years, and the amount of money should be under $200 (i know, spas are expensive). I live on long island so what are some good spas? How much would the massage cost? what KIND of massage should i get?

Also, i wanted to make him like a little basket. Like, a white teddy bear holding heart chocolates (yeah..im one of those corny people haha) and i wanted to buy lingerie for me to wear to put in it too because we wont be together for v-day =[ but i will see him like a month after that so i want him to be looking foward to me wearing that haha. Any other suggestions on what to put in it? THANKS =]

Put confetti in the basket to decorate it.

- edible massage oil
- body chocolate
- heart-shaped picture frame with photograph of you guys
- Valentine's Day boxers
- scrapbook
- mixtape or CD of his favorite songs
- cologne
- sexual favors coupon book lol or other favors like (good for one candlelit dinner)
- stick little love notes in it (love letters or poetry)
- heart-shaped cupcakes or chocolate-covered strawberries
- champagne
- bath bombs
- yummy-smelling candle

Q: Hey, i wanted to take a massage class, i dont want to become certified or anything, i just like giving my hubby massages ;) and i want to get better at them. is there any like one month class i can take or soemthing? i live in new york, and i dont want it to cost a fortune ahah. and i DONT want to go back to college. thanks =]

I'm not sure about New York, but there should be noncredit courses at community classes that are just for couples. At least there was a class like that where I live. Go to your local community college and look for the course booklet. Or check your local spa.

Q: My best friend is moving away. :'( We are all having a big party and i am putting together a slideshow of everybody's pictures with her. But what song or songs can i use to make it really nice? I really don't even know where to start looking for good songs for best friend slideshows!

Help?

The White Stripes - "We're Going To Be Friends"
^ good if you guys met when you were younger, you could have slides of you guys in your middle school days or whatever when you first met

Green Day - "Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)"
^ haha not how it sounds in the title

Queen - "You're My Best Friend"
Bill Withers - "Lean On Me"
The Rembrandts - "I'll Be There For You"
The Beatles - "With A Little Help From My Friends"
Dionne Warwick and Friends - "That's What Friends Are For"
James Taylor - "You've Got A Friend"
Rihanna - "Umbrella"
Louis Armstrong - "What A Wonderful World"
Ben E. King - "Stand By Me"
Sarah McLachlan - "I Will Remember You"
Mariah Carey - "Anytime You Need a Friend"

Q: Hey,
If you have herpes on your lip, like a cold-sore... and you give somebody oral, do they get genital herpes??

my answer to what someone else asked:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=576330

it's not genital herpes that they get. they do get herpes, but it's just called cold sores. wait until your outbreak is over and use a condom (even though that sounds weird, but be safe)

Q: Today is my 16th birthday and its just disappointing. I dont like telling people its my birthday cause then they'll be like "oh, happy birthday!" I mean even if they didnt know its not like its going to make me feel better because if you didn't say it after I just told you its my bday then it would be awkward. It only feels good when you don't tell people, and they remember. That feels really good. Or maybe I'd say it in advance.. or they look at my facebook if they really give 2 shits about me for when my birthday is. I mean I'd go above and beyond for people for their birthdays.. like I always make birthdays a big deal and have planned a surprise party for my mom's 40, among other people like my other family members. like i make a big deal out of it. and i would with friends given i was close enough with someone to even be invited to a birthday party (haven't been to a legit birthday party since i was like 10. i've been to 2 applebees parties last year though but i dont think they really count since i wasnt REALLY friends w/ them and it was really informal). I I mean maybe its just because I dont have any real close friends right now. Hate that. If I did and their parents wouldnt let them plan a party I'd go above and beyond to plan one for them and everything. Or get them a gift they'd really like. A thoughtful one. I dont know.. but birthdays always end up being one of the worst days of the year. usually even when i have parties. i can remember them sucking starting from age 8 when i had to clean my room. age 9, even though i had a party, i was upset over not being 8 cause 8 is my favorite number. age 10 i felt upset cause i thought double digits meant I was becoming "old". age 11-15 i cant remember distinctively but they all were sucky days too. today was a sucky day as well.. i mean its not like i had high expectations for my birthday today but i just feel a bit sad that i dont have close friends to make the day great. and that the day just has been sucking. im planning on having a half birthday to celebrate being 16 over the summer though.. hopefully i have good friends by then and that bday ends up being the best bday party ive ever had. only family makes it worthwhile.. and the people who comment on my facebook with a greeting. but then again i hope for that to happen every year on my regular birthday :/. maybe half birthdays are the proper way to go? I'll see.

When I have kids I definitely know I'll be one of those parents to make a big deal about every holiday. Even holidays that are in different parts of the world, if I feel like it. Like Girl's Day in Japan (given that I have girls. or i'll just go crazy shopping w/ my future husband lol)

I know exactly what you mean. It's how you know the fakes from who truly care. I sometimes remove my wall on the day, or some ppl deactivate their fb for a little bit until their birthday passes, or don't put their birthday up.

Sometimes, it helps to reconnect with someone. You can be like, "Thanks! It's been a while. What's up?" or something.

And some people just have a bad memory. Or if you just met a person and they don't remember and they feel bad for asking you again, but they really do care, they just later got to know you better..

i hope you have a great sixteen. with people who really matter. you can only hope that they care as much about you in return as you do about them.

Q: there are a lot of applications on facebook that say they show you who views your profile but do they actually work? like can people actually see who all views your profile?

No. It's against Facebook's privacy policies. Same goes for Myspace.

Q: What is the biggest relationship issue that you are currently experiencing?

Not ever being in one before.. and getting older all the time =(

Q: i like this guy hes a good friend of mines and i see hes name everywhere and hear it what could it mean i see it on tv hear it on the radio see it on walls what does this mean can some one help me its driving me crazy

It happens to everyone. Like everyone else said, if it's a common/generic name, it's normal.. just that you're noticing it more now because of this guy all of a sudden. Sucks, I know. All these reminders.

Q: me & my friend have been feuding over this for days.

Sleeping less may stunt your growth, but sleeping more will not make you grow taller. There isn't really a direct correlation with sleep and growth. Sleeping well means the person is healthy and has the right conditions to grow to his/her potential. (along with other factors, of course, like a good diet) There's no right answer to this. Sleep does help someone grow, I guess.

Q: I've had a few serious relationships in my life. Each one left me completely heartbroken. I haven't had a relationship for a few years and I never let a guy close. There have been some really great guys that have tried to start a relationship with me, but I freak out and push them away. The thing is, it's not only guys. I don't like getting close to girls, or anybody for that matter. I've lost most of my friends throughout the years and any girl who tries to be my friend or tries to hang out with me, I make excuses or blow it off. I don't know why I close everyone off. My mom always tells me "If you close off the bad, you also close off all the good". Most of the time, I enjoy being alone and being independent, going to school and spending time with family. I'm just terrified of being alone forever. I'm miserable most of the time and it is definitely my own doing! How do I open up to people? I'm so scared of putting myself out there, but also scared of never having a boyfriend or a good friend to lean on. It's the worst feeling when I want to run to a boyfriend or a best friend, and there's nobody (besides family). Is there anyway I can overcome this and let people really see me and get to know me? (20/F)

You've become very scared of rejection. It hurts, no kidding, but I think you should put yourself out there, and if you do, you have to slowly learn to trust people this time. Just get to know people first superficially. Don't get too close until you know they have your back for sure. It does take time to know how a person really is on the inside, so wait for situations that tell whether or not they are worth having around. Seriously, you do not need people in your life that make you feel miserable. With guys, go slow. Be their friend, but only that for now. With friends, don't reveal everything about yourself at the start or wait for them to start opening up to you. It's hard, but social interaction outside of one's family can do one a lot of good. Good luck.

Q: Okay to all girls,

How do you locate your own g-spot? Recently when I went to the gyno she had to pull my cervix forward because she couldn't get to it, could that make it harder to find?

Please help, thanks! :)

I heard that it's easier to find when you're already aroused. It is supposed to be enlarged when you are aroused and have a different texture to it, like a rougher patch or something than the rest of your vaginal wall. And it is supposed to be around your bellybutton area but it can be hard to reach all the way up there by yourself unless you are getting some kind of help.. that's all I know about it that hopefully will be of some help.

Q: Can a vigin have a STD? I was reading someone's answer here on Advicenators and they said that virgins can also carry STDs and spread them to new partners. The person even said that some babies are born with STDs or something and pass it to you later as adults if you have sex with them. Is that true or what?

I want to add that there are 2 types of herpes viruses. Herpes simplex virus type 1, which is genital herpes (genital warts) and herpes simplex type 2, which is when people get cold sores on the outside of their mouth. You can get those "mouth" type herpes on your genitals too and it can be painful. And it is quite common as it is highly contagious. The viruses can be dormant inside your body

I am not sure if it is possible for someone to be "immune" to a particular STI (they are now called sexually transmitted infections now, not diseases, because infections are more broad as they indicate that not all infections are manifested as easily). There are some people who have HIV (can pass from mother to child) that never develop AIDs. So it's not always 100% clear that just because someone doesn't show the symptoms, doesn't mean they don't have the illness.

It also depends on your definition of virgin. These hold true if you mean complete virgin, no sexual activity whatsoever, not just no vaginal/anal penetration, but also no oral sex. Not sure about stuff involving hands.

A lot of STIs that get passed from mother to child are "visible" in the sense that the child usually has some kind of mental and/or physical disability (this is true about syphilis).

One last thing, it is more easy to tell if a guy has an STI sometimes because their organ is right there for you to see. If you notice some kind of bump or sore, you kind of have an indication. With females, it's kind of hidden.

Q: can someone please answer this for me..i try to figure out but i just dont know what is the answer..but if you would respond to it i will appreciated.by the way this is chemistry. :(

-if you were fluorine a valence electron and you come in contact with rubidium what will happened?

fluorine is a nonmetal and rubidium is an alkaline metal.

you could make rubidium fluoride, which is more stable.

i mean predicting: (complete balanced equation)
F2 + Rb -> 2RbF

(F2 is a diatomic element by nature^) together, a metal ion and a nonmetal ion make a salt.

rubidium is in the first column in the table of elements with a charge of +1, which means it has an extra valence electron in its outer valence shell it wants to donate.

fluorine is in the 7th column of the periodic table. the column before the inert, stable, neutral noble gases which have no charge. fluorine has a charge of -1, which means it needs just one more electron to fill its outer shell of 8 electrons to satisfy the octet rule

Q: I decided to "spring clean" my laptop, after having it for almost a year. Just to speed it up a bit and such.
I can't afford to take it to get it serviced by a computer place, so I'd rather do it myself.
What kind of things should I be doing?
I know clearing out old files, deleting things I don't use and such. But are the any other things I definitely should do to speed it up a bit again and so on?
I don't need tips for external cleaning, I've got that covered.

Thanks :)

for one thing, i really recommend an external hard-drive. you can always put files that are not absolutely essential on it and just hook it up to your laptop whenever you want, like music, movie, picture files. this will tremendously speed up your computer. there are small ones that can be carried out and bigger ones, depending on your needs.

Q: does anyone know of any awesome Underground Artists of the indie/folk/rock persuasion ? I'm sick of mainstream and I wanna find some real good music, but I don't know where to look. So I figured I'd ask here, if you know any thanks

you can start by looking up soundtracks to indie films or just any tv show or movie with a good soundtrack like (500) "days of summer", "juno", etc.

other artists you should check out that are indie folksy: (some example songs)
- joanna newsom - "the sprout and the bean", "peach, plum, pear", "bridges and balloons", "sawdust and diamonds", "this side of the blue"
- devendra banhart - "lover", "little yellow spider"
- neutral milk hotel - "two-headed boy", "in the aeroplane over the sea", "oh comely", "king of carrot flowers"
- lisa mitchell - "coin laundry", "so jealous"
- tegan & sara - "frozen", "i can't take it", "nineteen", "speak slow", "where does the good go"
- built to spill - "car", "reasons", "center of the universe", "the plan"

(to add to the bottom answer).. personally i like the following songs:
florence and the machine - "kiss with a fist"
block party - "banquet", "blue light", "helicopter", "this modern love", "skeleton"

Q: How could you be nice to people without them taking advantage of you?

You sometimes have to say no politely, gently but firmly in a diplomatic way. Being nice is overrated. Don't be nice at the expense of your own needs. Try to find another way of getting out of certain situations. I can't really speak specifically, just generally. If you have a specific example of a situation like this we could help you too.

Q: what are some websites where you can just create a list online?

Listography: http://listography.com/

43 things: http://www.43things.com/

Remember the Milk: http://www.rememberthemilk.com/

Scrybe: http://iscrybe.com/main/index.php

Q: This isn't a cry for advice, I just wanted all y'all to have a Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! May 2010 be better than the last!

Q: i'm just gonna come out and say it; my "area" smells awful. its a fishy sort of smell, and i cant ever seem to get rid of it. i doubt its a yeast infection because i dont itch or burn, but the smell is overwhelming and i'm always self concious in public, because i know other people can probably smell it, too. anyone know what i could do to make it stop? i've already read articles about feminine odor and from what it seems like, i'm going to have to take care of it like i take care of my hair; constantly washing, powder, wiping a certain way, "airing out" at night, etc. that seems like a lot of trouble and i dont have time to deal with it that way. otherwise, i wouldnt be here. so does anyone know a quick, easy way to deal with this? and what if i'm planning on letting my boyfriend go down on me? is there anything that doesnt have a scent or taste? vagisil helps a little, but it still smells like cream, and its almost more embarrassing than the odor itself.

sorry this is so long, thanks for any help.

This may sound really odd, but in the current issue of Cosmopolitan, there is a tip in there. If you do have an imbalance of flora of natural good bacteria down there, you can use a some yogurt because it contains live good bacteria that can help fight off infection. I don't remember if you are supposed to stick a tablespoon or something up there.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20091109221923AAi9pEk
http://homeremediesforbacterialvaginosis.org/

Q: It's so embarassing. My mom's old, 63 with grey hair. And I am 13 years old. I have a brother whose 27 years old. My frends keep asking me "Oh, thats a really big gap between you and you brother. Why is that?" Its so embarassing. I feel bad.

People shouldn't ask questions like that. It's personal. Don't feel bad for having a unique family. Spacing kids out is financially a good idea, btw. If you have two kids one year apart, it would be hard to help pay for both their tuition at the same time.

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