about

Hi I'm Dee. I'm 23 and married. I've worked in health care as well as office settings but am now a home-maker. I'm knowledgeable in a variety of subjects but don't mind doing a little research if asked about something I don't know about. Most of my friends come to me for advice. I read several advice columns and would like to help you also.

I'm not judgemental. Your life is yours to live it as you choose. I believe asking for advice is good, but ultimately the choice is yours. You WILL NOT find a hurtful or smartass answer here.

If you have a question that you would like to keep private, you can email me and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

advice

ok i just got a letter inviting me to join the people to people ambassador program and our oriantation is at carrol senior high school in southlake! has anyone here been on a people to people trip and if so, how much was it because im sure its really expensive and do u have any good fundraising ideas!! thanx so much!!

I haven't been on the trip but I have heard a little about it so I'll see if I can help a little. Congratulations on getting selected for this program. It's a great experience and will look wonderful on a college transcript. Trip expenses vary by destination but include accomodations, meals, etc. They'll give you more details at orientation.

If you're a member of the church, ask if the church will sponsor your trip. Many churches will provide assistance for educational trips. You can also ask local businesses if they will sponsor your trip. Try your local newspaper and ask if they will sponsor your trip in return for an article on your experiences. See if the businesses that your parents work at will sponsor you. If you work, ask your boss if they will sponsor you. Other options to raise funds are a bake sale or a car wash.

Talk to your school guidance counselor about possible education grants that you may be eligible for. Some government programs provide funds for foreign travel to students.

Good luck.

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is it bad that i am an independant person.. when ever i get a boyfriend i dotn like it when he spends any money on me because i dont like it when girls use guys to buy them shit. but anyways my best friend is makin a big deal about it and my boyfriend doesnt like the idea. he thinks i dont like him when i dont let him buy me anything.. can someone please either help me change my point of view on this?? or do you think it is a good or bad that i am independant?? thanks

For a long time I was like that. I refused to let a guy buy me anything because I didn't want them to think I was "using" them. I finally learned to compromise by letting them buy me little stuff, nothing expensive unless it's a special occasion (anniversary, birthday, etc). That way they get to buy me something but I still have my financial independence. I hate depending on anyone, male or female, for money.

You should try compromising a little. Tell your boyfriend he can buy you stuff but it can't be over a certain amount. That way you don't feel like you're using him and he still feels "manly" because he can "provide" for you.

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well, i know what these are, but i want to know how i can get them, and when are you supposed to take them, once before the 24 hours, once, then EXACTLY 12 hours later? I'm real confused about this, i need them~and please don't tell me i'm not ready, cause i am "experienced" if u know what i mean, it's just, this time, i don't wanna b taking pills at the same time every day 4, and i don't want to b protected, i'm just trying to spice it up a little, i also don't want to order them online, cause not only am i broke, but my family will b all over me trying to see what they are, plus the delivery takes to long~i'll rate high 4 actual suggestions~help~

You can take them up to 5 days after you have unprotected sex. Try your health department or local planned parenthood office to get them. They usually base their fees on income and since you're broke, you should get them for free.

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Hey, one of my best friends is recovering from anorexia and she wants me to watch "For the love of Nancy". She won't tell me why, but she asked me to watch it. She said I could just download it. I have Limewire, and tried looking for it but it's not there.. I went to Blockbuster and they don't have it. I can't order it from amazon.com or any of those websites so idk what to do. Are there like any softwares that have a lot of movies? and please don't say Kazaa cause that one really messed up my computer.

Thank you! I rate 5's for a good try/answer

For the Love of Nancy is a great movie. It's about a girl dealing with anorexia so it'll give you an idea of what your friend is going through right now and has been going through.

It's a Lifetime original movie. You may not be able to download it. Check your tv schedule for the Lifetime or Lifetime movie channel. They usually show it at least once a month.

You might try BearShare, Morpheus, Imesh or Shareaza. They usually pull sources from various downloading programs which means you have a better chance of getting the movie.
http://www.bearshare.com/
http://www.morpheus.com/
http://www.imesh.com/
http://www.shareaza.com/

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Hi. My names Paige and i'm a 13 yr old female. Recently I have had someone IM me and tell me "u r nasty" and randon things like this, and i'm like why?. Well this girl I know was telling me about a pic that is being sent to my buddies that is of my "private area" and it has my name @ the top & bottom. And they only reason this has started is because this pervert dude that is in 11th grade wanted a pic of mine, so what I done was went to google and found a pic of one and sent it to him. I even told one of his "friends" that that was what I had done. Now some idiot has added my name to my pic and been sending it to ALL my friends over the internet. I really don't know what to do. People should know I am not that kind of person who would take a pic of that to be sent around the internet. I have told one of my friends that I wasn't the one who took the pic. I don't want people thinking thats my "area". What should I do? I'm usually a computer addict, but lately I have been staying off of it so I don't have to deal w/ this. I need to settle this once and for all. Any advice or help is GREATLY appreciated.
Thanks!

First off, you need to gather all the evidence you can. If he's emailed this pic, ask friends who have received it to forward it to you. On your IM program, turn on logging or message archive. The cruel messages you're receiving there can also be considered evidence.

Once you have your evidence, file a complaint with his ISP. The email address is generally abuse@(insert domain name here-Ex aol.com) If he's using a computer at school or other public access (Ex: Library), file a complaint with them. They will investigate your complaint and most likely refuse him internet access.

Also file a complaint with his email service unless it's also his ISP. They will investigate your complaint and if they agree that his actions are abusive, they can "lock" his account or even ban him.

You may need to contact the authorities on this one. Print out your evidence and take it with you when you file a complaint. Internet harassment or cyer-stalking is a crime. They will investigate your complaint and if they find he is doing this, he can end up in prison. Since you're under 18, it's punishable by up to 5 years in prison and up to a $250,000 fine.

Let your parents know what's going on. A quick phone call to this boy's parents may be all that's needed to stop this abuse.

Consider taking legal action. You can sue for invasion of privacy, infliction of emotional distress, and defamation or libel. Perhaps if this boy received a letter from a lawyer and realizes his immature actions are going to cost him financially, he'll back off.

Send a short email or IM to your friends letting them know that this guy is harassing you. True friends will realize that the picture is not you and give you the support you need right now.

Let this guy know that you've filed complaints against him. Remind him that if he's found guilty, he could end up in prison. Maybe once he realizes that he's going to end up in big trouble, he'll stop.

I hope this helps. Good luck.

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I've suddenly lost sound on my laptop. I've gone through the Help section to no avail. The nearest I come to an answer is that the system cannnot find %SystemRoot%\System\sndvol32.exe How do I restore this file?

I'm running WindowsXP Professional

sndvol32 is the windows system file that controls volume and sound. It's probably corrupted or missing and that's where your problem is. If you have your XP disk, you may be able to reinstall it from there.
Another option is to right click your "My Computer" icon on your desktop and then click properties. Click on the hardware tab then click device manager. Click the plus sign beside "sound, video and game controllers" and find your sound card. When you find it, right click and click update driver.
You may be able to find the sound file online but I'm not sure.

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Recently I was given a box of sweet potatoes from a friends garden. Does anyone have any recipes ideas for dishes I could prepare to use them. NO SWEET POTATOE CASSEROLE RECIPES PLEASE! Also, any recipes that could be prepared and frozen for later would be a big help.

I'll rate 5 for good answer!

Sweet Potato Chips
sweet potato
cooking oil
Peel sweet potato. Using a food processor fitted with the 2 millimeter slicing blade, cut into 1/1-6 inch slices, lengthwise. Heat oil in a large saucepan to 350 degrees. Fry sweet potatoes, a handful at a time, until pale golden and crisp. Remove with a slotted spoon, drain on paper towels, and sprinkle with salt. Reserve a day or two in plastic bags.

Sweet Potato Mash
2 sweet potatoes, medium
1/2 cup milk
2 tablespoons whole, unsalted butter
1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon dried ginger
1 teaspoon minced chipotle pepper (optional)
Salt
Cut 2 medium sized sweet potatoes into small, 2-inch cubes and boil in salted water, in a large pot, until the cubes are fork tender, about 7 minutes. Once the sweet potatoes are fully cooked, drain the water from the pot and place into a medium sized bowl. Stir in milk and butter. Add cumin, cinnamon, and ginger. For added heat, add minced chipotle pepper. Mix together with a masher or wooden spoon until the ingredients are fully mixed.

Caramelized Sweet Potatoes:
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
4 1/4 pounds sweet potatoes, peeled, trimmed and cut into 1-inch dice
1/2 cup firmly packed light brown sugar
1/2 cup Steen's 100% Pure Cane Syrup
1/4 cup dark molasses
1/4 cup dark corn syrup
1/8 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
Pinch teaspoon ground allspice
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon


Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a large baking dish with the butter. Toss the sweet potatoes in a large mixing bowl with the brown sugar, cane syrup, molasses, corn syrup, nutmeg, cloves, allspice, and cinnamon to coat evenly. Pour them into the prepared pan and roast until fork-tender, about 1 hour.

Sweet Potato Gratin
1 tablespoon butter, plus 6 tablespoons, chilled and cut into small cubes
1 cup freshly squeezed orange juice
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon ground ginger or 1 tablespoon fresh ginger
Pinch freshly grated nutmeg
Salt and white pepper
1 (12-ounce) can crushed pineapple with juice
4 pounds sweet potatoes, peeled and sliced into 1/8-inch pieces

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Use one tablespoon of butter to grease a 9 by 13-inch baking or gratin dish. Mix together orange juice, brown sugar, and spices, then add pineapple. Layer slices of sweet potatoes in the dish, then dot with butter. Top with pineapple mixture. Season each layer with salt and pepper. Repeat this process until all sweet potatoes are used up, ending with pineapple mixture.
Bake in oven for 40 to 45 minutes until sweet potatoes are tender when a pairing knife is inserted. Baste gratin with excess juices every 10 minutes. The top should be bubbly and brown. If the top gets too brown or starts to burn, cover with aluminum foil and continue cooking until sweet potatoes are done.

Sweet Potato Pancakes:
2 medium to large sweet potatoes, peeled and shredded
1 egg
1/4 cup brown sugar
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 teaspoon ground ginger
4 to 5 tablespoons vegetable oil
Mix all ingredients, except oil, in a large bowl until just combined. Form mixture into 4 equal size patties, like small pancakes. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add patties, in batches, to the hot oil and fry until firm and brown on both sides. Keep warm until ready to serve.





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ya so people answered this question just so uk im the 14/m and just so uk im not some crazy killer rapist but w/e people can say wut they want and actually it is more stupid on my part b/c im the one meeting her and i dont have ne body to go w/me and no1 in my family would know if i went there b/c my mom works from 8 to 5:30 so u would be home by then so ya w/e

13/f he is 14/m
Theres this guy that i've been talking to online for about a year. We eventually exchanged cell phone numbers and have talked on the phone. He is really nice and I find myself feeling in love with him. I know people probably think internet love is a bust but that's how I feel when I talk to him. He isn't one of the guys that wants to have cyber sex either, just to talk. He's always there when I need him and he's very sweet and he is always looking out for my best interests as well. I want to meet him but I don't know if I should. He lives about an hour away from me and he was planning on taking a train to visit me. I know there are some freaks out there, but I don't think he comes off as one of them and I also know to be careful and if I were to meet him I would bring a friend, of course. I don't know what to do, the train station is public but the town is small so not a whole bunch of people would be there. Please give me advice.

Just tell a friend where you're going and who you're meeting. While my parents did know who I was meeting from online and where most of the time, I did use a friend from time to time. You can meet in a restaurant where there will be more people if it makes you feel more comfortable. I see nothing wrong with meeting people online and have done it 6 times so far, including meeting my husband online.

Good luck.

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Hi, does neone kno how long it takes to lose 5 pounds?

If you are persistent and reduce your calories and exercise, you should be able to lose the weight in about 2 1/2 weeks. It takes 3500 calories to make a pound. If you decrease your calorie intake by 500 a day and lose another 500 calories exercising a day, then it should be easy.

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I know not to trust anyone on the internet. But what are ways to find out he is a normal, nice guy? I'm not giving out any information, i'm not that stupid. But how can I get proof from him?

Meeting people from the internet can be both a scary and an exciting thing. I've met 6 people that I've talked to online, including my husband. You just have to take precautions to make sure you're going to be safe.

1) Always meet in a public place with plenty of people around and let a friend know where you're going as well as the information you have on the person you're meeting. If you have a cell phone, ask a friend to call in every 30 minutes to check on you and make sure everything is ok. Work out a code so you can tell your friend yes it's ok or no something is wrong, get help.

2) If he gives you his phone number, go to the page below and put it in. Unless it's a cell or unlisted number, it should pull up a name as well as an address. Check it to see if the informations matches up with what he's told you. If in doubt, ask him who the number is listed under. Call when he's not expecting you to just to see who answers.
http://www.anywho.com/rl.html

3) If he gives you his address, go to the page below and check it out. See if it matches up.
http://www.infospace.com/info/revaddr.htm?&actnav=org

4) The link below has a couple different ways to find out information. Sometimes it will list approximate age so you can verify that.
http://intelius.com/

5) If he mentions a school, find out the number and call and see if he's a student there.

6) If he mentions a job, find out where and call to verify it.

7) If you can afford it and have some of his information, you can have a background check ran on him. Usually just a name and date of birth are needed. The site below offers them.
http://whoishe.com/

Good luck. Be safe.

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is it possible to become pregnant in this situation:
a guy touches his.. thing, and gets that "pre-cum" or whatever on his hand/fingers. then he fingers a girl, a few minutes later, with the same hand as before.
please only answer if you actually know what you're talking about.

Pre-cum generally doesn't have a lot of sperm in it but it only takes one that's determined enough. Sperm can survive for up to 72 hours if the conditions are right. They do not die when they hit the air unless they've been in the air enough to dry up. The chances are low, but there is a possibility of pregnancy.

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Planned parenthood just had free pap smear tests on August 2nd, but I missed it. Does anyone know anywhere else in Indy they have those? Soon? Thanks. I'll rate high.

Depending on your income, they may offer it to you for free anyway at Planned Parenthood. Call and ask. You also might try your local health department. They usually do paps at little, and often no cost.

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O.K. My boyfriend cheated on me like... 3 weeks ago. I forgave him, as long as he never did it again. It was pretty hard trusting him again after that, but I did. After I had THOUGHT I had gained nothing but love and respect for him again... he CHEATED ON ME AGAIN with my sister! I know it's pretty weird but I don't trust EITHER one of them. How can get over the fact that my OWN sister could do that to me? I miss my boyfriend but I have been hurt enough and don't NEED him in my life. I love my sister but what she did was wrong and I have still not forgiven her.
I can't believe this could ACTUALLY happen to me! I'm so depressed all the time and I have lost hope in ever finding the right guy again! I really thought he was the one for me. He was so right for me, so perfect and then, BOOM! He's sleeping with my sister! I don't know what to do! I'm so confused. I'm so depressed that I'm throwing up and crying non-stop. It's really sad for me. My sister keeps telling me she's sorry but I still have not forgiven her. I haven't even talked to her! Please help! This is really devastating for me and I need someone to tell me what to do!

I rate high!
Katie Marie Sanchez- age 17

It is completely natural to feel angry and to not want to trust anyone right now. Don't try to bottle your emotions up inside. It will just get you down. If you have a trusted friend you can rant to, call them. Or keep a journal. Get your feelings out somehow.

If your sister tries to apologize again, tell her that you love her but right now you just need your space. What she did was wrong, but I think she sees that now. Once you get over some of your anger, you'll be able to look at her more favorably. Even though you will probably forgive her, it will take a while to build the trust again.

It takes time to get over having your love betrayed. I've been there myself a time or two. Just take it slow. Don't give up on guys. Not all of them are like that. If you let this experience color your thinking in future relationships, you may miss out on your Mr. Right. I almost let mine walk away because I was afraid to trust for the same reasons you feel that way. Think of it as a learning experience. Now you know what signs to look for.

It'll take time but your heart will heal. I know it doesn't feel like that now but it will. It just takes time. Take time to work through your emotions. Cry, yell, scream, do whatever helps.....these are natural emotions.

Once you get to the point where you feel you're ready to move on, take your time. Don't rush into another relationship. Make sure the guy is really the one for you.

Good luck. I wish you the best. Hugs.

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When I got a divorce from my husband, I had $57 to live on and ever since that time I have been struggling to get out of debt. I was left with a lot of health bills and everytime I try to get out of debt (already have had debt consolidation and filed bankruptcy. I was not able to pay for the debt consolidation as when the time came due to pay my rent and other current bills that was due. Also I have lost jobs because the place closed and/or shipped my job overseas. When ever I can I try to work extra hours. I am now working at a job that I am working over time on for main job and also for doing artwork for my job doing murals for the breakroom. I sometimes go in at 9am and don't get home until after 12am. Also I can't keep up with this because of my health issues as well. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have you tried contacting the creditors directly? A lot of times if you explain the situation to them, they can work out a different payment plan or even defer a couple of payments.

I don't know if you're aware but on hospital bills, they have to accept any amount you send them, as long as you send them something every month. It can be as low as $5. As long as you're showing an effort to pay the bill, they can't bother you.

You might try Consumer Credit Counseling. I have heard that they can help in this situation. http://www.consumercredit.com/

There is also an organization called Modest Needs that offers assistance to people that have got in a bind and need help. They won't pay all your bills but they may pay a little towards them. The first link is to their site. The second link is to another page in the site that lists various help organizations that might be able to help you in your situation.
http://www.modestneeds.org/
http://www.modestneeds.org/help/resources/

I hope this helps. Good luck.

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Hi my name is sarah and im only 16. I dont know if you can help me in any way but i read that you were in health care. So Here is my question. I have been having itching and irritation down by my vagina or shall I say around it. It hurts to touch it and it feels very sore. Is there anything that I can put on it to ease the pain and to heal it? thanks

Depending on whether you're sexually active or not, it could be one of a few things-a yeast infection, a vaginal infection, an STD, or possible something else. If it is a yeast infection, you can buy Monistat or Vagistat at the store and follow the directions on the box. A vaginal infection and STDs must be treated by a doctor. I would suggest making an appointment with your doctor or gynecologist to be checked to determine exactly what is it. Once you know what it is, your doctor can recommend a treatment.

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hey, i wanted to give my boyfriend head but is there any possible stds you can get from that? If so, what are they and are they serious?

Yes you can get an STD from giving head. They include, but aren't limited to, herpes, HIV/AIDS, chlamydia, syphilis, genital warts, gonorrhea, trichomoniasis and Hepatitis B. They are all very serious. Many can be treated but not cured. Left untreated they can lead to serious health problems, infertility and even death.

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does anyone know of any websites where you can make ur own website like xanga but not xanga something like it but no that.... Plese don't tell me livejournal or myspace thanks

If you're just looking for a weblog or journal site you might try these links.
http://www.myownjournal.com/index.php
http://www.journalhome.com/start.php
http://www.my-diary.org/

If you're looking more to build a website about you, you can try these.
http://www.freewebs.com/
http://www.tripod.lycos.com/
http://geocities.yahoo.com/

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is there ANY possible way yu can go swimming w/o a tampon. Like, any way. please help, i'll rate high

The only way of that I know of where you can go swimming without a tampon is to use the product in the link below.
http://www.divacup.com/

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What are some good HTML websites where I can get cursors, music, and cool icons?

***PLEASE do not suggest purplepopcorn, diamondrains, or toxxic.net***

WILL RATE~

http://www.htmlgoodies.com/
http://www.musiccodescentral.com/link2.html
http://videocodes4u.com/
http://www.iconarchive.com/

Hope these help.

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Im 23 years old and very attactive have been with my husband whos 33 for 6 years. It takes me along time to reach orgasim and can only do so my oral sex or by him touching my clitoris.
I put alot into our sex life to keep things spiced up and enjoy it but when sex is over he acts like performing any sort of "favor" for me is a chore. Ive tryed to tell him his behavior makes me feel like he dosent want to do it and only is doing so to make me happy. When Im thinking this its impossible to reach orgasim.
He dosent understand its not that hes doing the wrong thing its just how hes doing it.
Ive tried and tried to explain this to him,them women need more emotional stimulation and not just physical. I would like him to say nice things or act like he enjoys it but he acts like its just a chore to do it. I though all guys liked to touch woman. Whats the deal with this? Its so frustrating because I get aroused during sex but then when there is no release because I dont want to have him touch me as a chore I just end up feeling used.

I'm also 23 and my husband is older so I know where you're coming from in this. This is a really touchy subject with most men. If you do say something, they usually feel inadequate. If you don't say anything, then you're miserable.

Try taking control of the situation yourself and setting aside a night for teasing. Rub him against you but don't let him orgasm. Try the cowgirl position but let him know if he moves, then you'll stop. Take his hands and place them where they'll do the most good. Once you're close to orgasm or have had one, let him take control back. I love it when we reach orgasms together. It's so much more intense, especially if we've both been holding it back.

Try some new positions. It's possible that your husband is just not hitting the right spot due to the position you're using.

If you're both comfortable with it, consider introducing some toys into sex. Most women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm. Buy a remote control bullet or egg, place it on your clit, then hand him the controls. That way you get the extra stimulation you need but he still feels like he's the one that brought you to orgasm.

Instead of just telling him you need more emotional stimulation, specify in what ways. Guys do better when you tell them directly. Sometimes subtle hints will get your point across. Tell him "I love you" during sex. If he gets used to you saying it, he'll probably start doing it also. When you finish, snuggle up against him and say "I love laying in your arms after we make love." He'll get the point.

One last thing you might consider. If he's getting off really fast, perhaps it's a medical problem. There are medications that can help deal with this.

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