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advice

ok my friend amber asked me to go on a cruise with her..so at first i was thinking "omg! this is so great!!! i wanna go soooo bad!" so i told her i would. now that the cruise is getting closer and closer...i'm having some serious second thoughts. i always get homesick - i can bairly get through a single sleepover without crying myself to sleep. i seriously need my own bed..and now that my dad is sick i really dont want to leave (he needs surgery but it stubbern and refuses to get it!)! now im having these thoughts more and more and im totally freaking out..its for 4 days and i need advice like i need oxygen! PLEASE HELP!

I would say tell your friend that you can't go.. because if for one night you cry yourself to sleep ; imagine 4 days!! And if your dads sick.. I'm sure you wanna be home with him. So I'd suggest that you not go..hope I helped!!





Love,
MELii

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I just got a new phone, and its a nextel i730, And i want to know if it has text message cause i read the instructions but it doesn't say anything about it, so can you please tell me if it does, and how to use it. If it doesn't have text how can i get it? thanks alot, i'll rate high

Well I don't have a Nextel ; but I'd suggest just try searching around you're phone.. like look in your messages and contact area and stuff. And if you still don't see anything about it... then I'd suggest you call the Nextel Company and ask them, because even if you do have text messaging, you might not have unlimited, so it'd cost money.. which your parents probably wouldn't like.. hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii

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well im 13 and my sister is 15 but for some reason, evertime a guy likes her or she goes out with someone, i get really pissed off and scare the guy away. ( I even gave a guy a black eye) I know that shes gonna go out with guys, but i dont want anybody to hurt her or take advantage of her. last summer, we went to the same summer camp, and a guy liked her and thats where i punched a kid. we tell each other everything so she knows about the gfs ive had (only 2) and she didnt like my gfs either. should i give a guy a chance, and am i being too overprotective?

I think you're being a little overprotective ; I mean I understand that you care about you're sister and want her to be safe and stuff but I don't think black eyes are gonna help her dating life. Haha just get to know the guy first, and then if you don't like him, talk to you're sister about it.. and then maybe hook her up with guys that you already know. Like friends brother ; guys you just know in general.. cause then you alreay know them and like them...but if the guy is being a major jerk ; then I can understand a black eye. Haha.. hope I helped!!





Love,
MELii

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Hey does anyone know what to do to look taller? what do i wear? should i do my hair in any speacial way e.t.c? Its sort of weird but im ALOOT taller than one of my friends, but still it looks like she's taller, why is that? is it because she's skinnier? ot because she wears tight clothes? or because she wears make-up so she looks older?? ´thanx for any answer =)

Um about your friend looking taller ; some things just appear that way.. like shoes make a difference.. her shoes could have a thicker heel than yours which would make her taller ... but if you took them off, you'd be taller.. which is another suggestion. Wear thicker heels on you're tennis shoes. Hope I helped!!





Love,
MELii

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Hey I always get eyeliner that smudges.... any ideas for one that doesn't or very little smudge?

Well the stuff I use seems pretty good ; it's called JANE. Every now and then it smudges, but if it does, I just wipe it off.. and it always still looks like it's on, so you don't really ever need to re-apply it. Just makes sure you have a friend or a mirror or something to tell you whenever it DOES smudge haha.. or you could try waterproof, cause then it'd just stay on like even if you sweat and cry and stuff haha =) Hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii

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i need help about a friend....we have been talking on the internet and like we have gotten so close...its unreal...but i lied about my identity...its not that i don't like the way i look this picture was a lot better...now i feel like a loser cuz i really want to tell him the truth but i am afraid that he won't talk to me anymore...and i really don't want that he is too fun@ HELP PLEASE! I will RATE REALLLLY HIGH!!!

Ok.. I can seriously help. I did the same exact thing this year.. haha I told him the truth about.. 3 months ago... and we're still talking.. he did get a little upset but then he just asked me to describe myself and then supposedly whenever I get a stupid scanner working, I'm sending him one haha.... just explain to him how you wanted to show him your picture, you were just afriad that he'd find you ugly.. and then I'd suggest you show him the real you...so he might be a little mad at first, but he'll probably forgive you ; I mean he can't be mad at someone he's never met haha =) Hope I helped!



Love,
MELii

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Okay I met an older guy a couple of weeks ago when I was out with friends. We exchanged numbers and he tried calling once... but now that I am changing phones and don't currently have one we don't talk as often. There are a few things he hasn't been telling me.. like court dates and why he still has his old number from a different state..and wants me to bring new friends. Should I plan to meet him or forget about him?

My suggestion is that I would forget him ; I mean if he has court dates.. that means he's bad business and then if he's like.. older, older.. not like 3 years or something then it kinda sounds like he wants a gang-rape or something which is why he wants all your friends to come or something..=/..so I'd just forget him.. hope I helped..!!




Love,
MELii

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people say im really pretty and nice but it doesn't seem like anybody wants to be my friend. should i be like hyper and wild? cuz i have noticed that people like hyper and wild friends. idk what do i do?

Weell if you maybe you should be a little wild and hyper not like HUGE hyper and wild ; just be more friendly and goofy and just having fun and talk alot because if people see you're having fun...they'll want to have fun with you. And then you talk to them, and then get a friendship going... so whenever you're out at a party or just hanging somewherre with friends friends.. just start making jokes, having a good time, and talking to them alot and find out what you have in common with them.. but if you don't like being hyper and wild I suggest you don't ; cause then you're not being yourself and then people won't get to know the real you. Hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii



p.s. And if you do decide to be hyper and wild.. don't get to carried away =)

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hey, alright im new to this and my friend recommended this so im gonna give it a try.. this may take a lil while to explain.. ever since the summer before 8th grade .. 2 years ago.. i've liked this kid .. we went out for 3 months ..and i got cheated on twice.. he meant so much to me and i couldnt even tell you, he became my life, we ended up breaking up because things just didnt seem to work out, i tried to go out with other guys, so get over him but it never seemed to work, i ended up going out with this one guy ..but he was into drugs and such..what i wasnt in to.. so after that we told each other we'd get back together, and we finally did .. on february 16th, it became the best day of my life, and i couldnt tell you how much he meant to me, the feelings i had for him became so strong, that the word love seem to come to mind quite often, we went out, and he ended up cheating on me again, the worse thing he could ever do, and to this day it hurts to talk about this, we ended up breaking on June 4th ..up at the end of the school year because i was going to high school, and the feelings he had for me just werent as strong.. so the summer came and our feelings for each other were back .. we had a hook up here anf there ..every so often.. at this time, my feelings had never changed from day one about him.. school year came around and we didnt end up talking as much as we liked but we tried.. he went his way with girls and i went my way with guys.. soon i found a guy who treated me so good.. and i thought maybe i could get over him with this guy.. so he treated me so good..not even a month into the relationship ..he cheated on me.. so i dumped him..and when i decided i would dump him i knew my feelings were as stong as i thought.. so i knew my feelings for the other boy .. never left me.. i've tried so many things to get over him.. but during the school year .. he met a girl.. and she played him from the start.. she ended up starting to like him..and he liked her .. so they went out..and me and him still talked.. she HATED me more than anything .. i told her i couldnt help my feelings i've had for him.. but she didnt get it.. he ended up telling me he wanted me back and that everything would be okay because we'd have everything back again.. so he dumped her..and i had the best days of my life with him..it seemed so perfect.. so one day came along..where he had told me he missed his ex-girlfriend.. and that the more time he spent with me made him want her more.. this totally crushed me.. and now its to now.. hes back with her..and i couldnt be more heart broken.. the summer was mine and his time.. to be together, no matter what girl came along, he never let her get in the way of the summer..but now he has.. he told me this girl was the one.. he really loved her.. and this puts me to tears to even say this..but i miss him alot.. and i love him alot..and i told him as long as hes happy.. im happy...but its not true.. it will never be true..i'll never be as happy as i was when i was with him and i cant do anything about.. i need you to please help me.. i cant figure out my life.. and this situation has ruined it.. i've tried to hard to help myself..but right now im about to enter depression.. this is really serious.. please help me and tell me what you think on this situation =(

Well I would say that if he cheated on you ; that isn't real love. You can't seriously love someone and then do that to them...but what he did was just wrong. Cheating on you numerous times ; breaking your heart like that ; telling you another girl was the one.. that's the rudest thing I've ever heard of! So in a way it's kind of good that you guys aren't dating anymore because I mean, what if he cheated on you AGAIN? =/ So in a way, it is kind of for the best.. because who knows? This girl could be "the one" and he could be off finding another girl who's the next "one" and she doesn't even know it. =/ But I know that you love him alot and that you miss him, but I'm sure over time, you'll slowly but surely start to get over him....you may not think you will never again in your life... but you will..and even if you think you're sooo depressed, maybe you could go to one of those talk groups and talk with people who have shared the same thing you have.. I did that once whenever my friend died, and it helped sooo much..=/... hope everything works out for you, and I hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii

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Well im supposed to get my period tomorrow..but sometimes its late. and i need to go swimming all weekend and next week. but i dont use tampons..so is it ok to swim with Pads? thanks

Well here's what I do: My mom told me to just wear a pad so then you don't get any blood on your bathing suit, and you will soak up some blood.. and then also my mom told me whenever I first got mine that I can also go swimming ( because I had swimmiing lessons at the time ) because whenever you go in the water sometimes it just like..stops for some reason.. so .. and if you're in the lake, and some leaks down your leg or something, just tell poeple you got a little cut on your leg or something. So, I think it's fine, cause I swim all the time! Hope I helped!


Love,
MELii

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on some peoples columns why do they have stars? like if you go to Browse Comlumnists. What do they mean? why do those people have them????

PlEaSe AnSwEr!!!

Those mean ratings. Like you can click how many stars you think the person deserves.
1=very bad
5=perfect
and whenever 5 stars are highlighted, that means alot of people rated them perfect, and it shows that you're a good advice columnist so then more people will come cause they know you have good advice. =)



Love,
MELii

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okay i dont know you, like i dont know you at all but im getting really cunfused and whne i saw this i just hadda ask. okay. me n this one kidd that i liked for a long time went out for 6 months and liike i still "love" him alot but he dont liike me..AT ALL.. so im kinda over him but there this other kid J.J that i like and went out with and then i was starting to really like him and then he broke up with me.. and i cryed and blah blah blah and then i started to like this other kid R.R ..and so me n him are going out now.. and liike he acts liike all he wants is.. *cough*cough* and likke i still like J.J and wanna go out with him..l8ike we hing out yesterday and he was like to bad you have a BF and i just like wanted him to hold me n stuff and liike i was gonna break up with R.R buuttt then J.J said he wuldnt do that to R.R (cuz they are kinda friends) so shuld i stay with R.R ?

Well if you still like R.R at all still maybe you should, unless you really like J.J more than you do R.R but then again maybe you SHOULD break up with him..and especially if all he wants is *cough*cough*..( haha =P )..cause it sounds like he doesn't care for you like J.J possibly could if you two went out again and who knows? J.J might decide to ask you out again if R.R's okay with it...so I suggest to break up with R.R cause who wants to be with a guy that only wants *cough*cough*..? So maybe in the future J.J might ask you out, but if he doesn't then it would be good if you two just hung out, because even if you can't date him, you can still be really close to him which would be better than nothing...hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii

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my boyfriend asked me to have sex with him and i dont want to but i dont know how to let him down easily.. what do u suggest i tell him ?

Well you should sit him down and explain all the things that could come from sex: Pregnancy,AIDS,HIV,all sorts of diseases.. and ask him if that's what he really wants. And if he says yes still, just be like," Well I don't want that." And if he uses that," If you loved me you would", excuse, well just be like," well if you loved me you would respect my decision. And if he pressures you into having sex, then that doesn't really seem like such a good boyfriend to me. =/ your smart cause think of all the things that could happen to you like I listed above, and theres so much more stuff than that. So just explain to him what all could happen and how you feel about the subject. It's your decision not to, and he should respect it. Hope I helped!! =)




Love,
MELii

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hey.alright well .. i dont know if you can help but there is this kid that i like && he likes me alot i guess too..we`ve went out like 2 times already and i broken up with him both the times becuase hes soo quiet .. he never talks to me other than online.. he never calls me. he comes over though .. but with his friends and its annoying because he doesnt even ask me if he can come over. he just comes over. and sometimes im not even prettied up && dressed yet.. and i just went away to florida for a while and he text me 398247829374 millon times a day saying how he misses me and stuff. and i miss him too.. and saposofly hes gunna ask me out again.. what should i do? i mean i like him alot and everything but i dont know what to do anymore.. please helppppp!! thanks

Okay about the talking thing ; sometimes you'll have to make up some of the conversation, because boys aren't the biggest conversationalists most of the time.. but you shouldn't have to every single time.. he should start stuff every now and then too. Ask him what he wants to talk about and if he says," I don't know.." then just start something, but make it something he'll have to answer like personally you know what I mean? Like," Oh that makes me think of the time.." or something like that.. and then that'll get the conversation going about that subject. And about the coming over thing ; you should REALLY talk to him about that.. I mean he shouldn't just WALK right over to your house without asking.. what if you're doing something like eating dinner or something? So if/when he does ask you out again just mention this stuff just be like," Well I would like to go out with you again, but the reason I broke up with you the first two times was because you need to talk to me more. Make up some of the conversation.. I don't want to have to do it everytime. It makes me feel ignored and that you don't wanna talk to me or something. And please just stop walking over to my house..I wanna look nice and stuff, so call me before you do..ok?" .. not EXACTLY that, but something maybe like it. Hahaha but I'd just talk to him about it so then if you two do go out again, he'll know to talk more and stuff...hope I helped!!



Love,
MELii

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Where can I submit my icons so that I can get people to start putting them up on their icons sites.

www.iconator.com
www.hellicons.com

those are the only two I know because I get all of mine at www.iconator.com haha they have really good ones there and alot of people go there and comment on them!! Hope I helped!!



Love,
MELii

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hey. I have liked this guy for three years and a little bit ago he got mad at me b/c i was jealous when he danced with my best friend. recently he got mad at me bcuz he said i was unreliable. now im getting him to talk more but its not our usual friendship. he said he knows i can fix it, i just have to figure out how... any ideas?

Well since I don't exactly know the whole entire story, but from what you told me, it seems maybe he thinks that since you sent your friend on " the guilt trip " that whneveer she broke up with him, that she really did wanna go out with him but felt bad, so maybe he thinks you can make it better if you two just let them go out or something.. cause he might think that they like eachother.. unless you explained him like, EVERYTHING. ( I don't know if I'm not making sense then just IM me. Haha ) Cause if he does, that's another situation.. cause maybe he just wants to liket hink about it or something, and not talk to you for awhile just to think if he'll forgive you or not..which is why he's not like trying to help you out. I'm sure by the end of summer you guys'll sort this out.. but to get him to talk more, think of covnersations where he has to have like an opinion or say more than one thing.. cause at least that'll get him talking more.. =) Hope I helped!!




Love,
MELii




p.s. Hi Kelsey =)

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Mel,

Our Michael has become obsessive with his nature and constantly repeats his nickname that YOU gave him, and now i can't get him to talk to me unless i call him pretty princess...it was you! lol what should i do to him to make sure that he understands that nickname makes him look like a fruit! and by no means do i want my boyfriend looking like a fruit, but it looks like we're too late, look what you DID! what ever should i do?¿

Love, Kayli

First of all: I don't remember giving him that name! Hahaha.. well I'd suggest that you just start calling him by his name again, and if he doesn't answer you then be like ( you don't have to exactly say this..but maybe something like it )," Look.. that name was like, funny at first but it's starting to get annoying now.. can I just call you Mike every now and then?" Just lay it down to him without trying to piss him off.. don't diss the nickname. Haha!! =) But seriously, just let him know how you feel about it without trying to be harsh or something. Hope I helped!!


Love,
your card-switcher =P



p.s. I think you gave me AIDS bitch!! =)

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Hey, this is the same girl before, I just don't think what I wrote explained enough. And I really need to get all of my thoughts written down and off my chest. I hope you don't mind. And if you can't help me that's fine I will totally understand. Okay, well I love everything about this kid- his smile, laugh, walk, smell, hair, height, personality, looks..just everything. I've seen all sides of him. He can be sweet, shy, angry, jealous, upset, sad, excited, laughing, trying, studying, nervous, & even sweating, i know, grose. But I know a lot about him. It's like i know him so well, that everything he does is so perfect, like nothing he says could ever be stupid. He's so special to me. It's incredible how much I care about him. I've liked him since early September. And I only went out with him on -February 14, 2005--The best day of my whole entire life forever!

Okay well like I said before.. I really really really super-mondo suggest that you talk to this boy, because if you ever want the chance of him getting back together with you again, you'll have to talk to him first, try to get him to hang out with you again, one on one. And then if you guys are just talking, maybe every now and then add an old memory not like," remember the time we made out.." or something like that just like a funny thing that happened between you two cause then maybe he'lll start to fall in love all over again. And that was good-- that you wrote to me again, got everything off your chest. It really helps to do that.. and I liked reading it =) I hope you feel better =) Also, maybe I'd send this to him. Because maybe if he reads your side of everything, then he'll understand that you really do care about him alot and that you just didn't show it, but wanted to. I just think definetly do SOMETHING. If not send him what you just said to me ( or something like it ) then at least talk to him and try and hang out with him. Cause maybe you won't be his whole life ( I mean his girlfriend, lol sorry I'm trying to be metaphoric..work with me=P ).. you'll just have to be a part of it.. and that would be better than not being anything at all. So seriously just talk to this boy, and I hope everything works out for you =) And you might think you'll never get over him.. but someday you will and maybe you won't have to cause he'll be there next to you =) So once again, just.. talk to him, try to hang out with him, be as close to him as you can, even if it means being friends for a bit, because then someday.. that might become more again. I really really really hoped I helped you out and I hope that everything works out for you!!!!!



Love,
MELii




p.s. I know why you feel so strongly... because I can tell you really really love him alot and not for the popularity things.. you love him for him, and that's something rare =)

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Alright.I wasn't really sure about getting advice from you at first, but, I really need it.Ok, my boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months now and I feel like things are going to fall apart soon.We have our 'ups and downs' from time to time but we always get through them, but now my problem is that I feel like he's ignoring me whenever I talk to him on AIM.He still tells me that he loves me, that he misses me, and that he wishes that he could be with me, but I don't know if I can do this anymore.We're both really shy and I know it's hard for him to find things to talk about with me, but I wish that I didn't have to pick the topic of out conversation for once =/.I don't know, it might be because it's summer and we don't get to see eachother very much since we don't live really close to eachother.But if you have ANY advice to give me, I would be EXTREMELY grateful..Oh yeah, and I'm a girl and I'm 14.Just thought I'd let you know.

Well see, if he WANTS to be with you.. then I think he should try I mean it's summer..no school, no nothing, so I'd think there'd be time to spend with his girlfriend...cause I'd think he'd be able to maybe get a ride over your house or somewhere close to both of you two every now and then. But first,my advice is that'd I try to get him to talk much much more. Be like," So what do you wanna talk about?" or.." Wanna do something?".. Because that's how boys are sometimes. They can't think of anything to talk about, so you have to start... but not you shouldn't have to EVERY single time. But then maybe if it continues this way, then I'd let go of him, because I don't think anything would get any better/worse... and it'd be kinda pointless having a boyfriend over the summer that hardly talks nor sees you cause you could spend that time trying to find someone who will actually do those things. But first, just trying getting him to talk more, and try to see if he can come over or if you can go over his or something...and then see what happens. But if you don't want to dump him either, that's your decision. Hope I helped!!



Love,
MELii

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okay. so theres this boy. and i really like him. i've liked him since september. he was constantly mean to me when he found out i liked him. so i decided to pretend to like another cutie ha. once i did though i noticed the boy i like started to come back to me. he would talk to me. and i would ask him to help me out with this other kid that i am pretending to like. i would ask all these questions. of course he would answer them thinking i wanted to know about Brian (the kid im pretending to like) But what he didn't know is that i was asking him to learn more about him. so i can know about him without him knowing. you know? well anways, the more and more we talked the nicer things he would say to me. so then i found out he liked me. BOY WAS I HAPPY!!!!!!!! OH MY GOSH you have no clue. for about two weeks i didnt believe it though. until he told me at my locker to my face and i missed me bus ;) who cares, anything for him. but anyway, hes a really shy guy and it took him soo long to ask me out because he didnt know for sure if i liked him. so he FINALY asked me out on Valentine's Day-feb 14- THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE. he gave me a teddy bear, chocolates, and a heart silver necklace! It was the cutest thing ANYONE has ever given me! Of course i said yes to him. we went out for 1 month, 2 weeks, and 20 hours. yes, i counted im a freak. but he ended it because he didnt feel i liked him as much as he liked him. he had no clue that i was so deeply in love with him but didnt realize it. i didnt know how to show him. because i thought it was too much. i should've showed him though. then i guess he still liked me. idk hes off and on w/ me. but now that he might be leaving to a different high school next year i will be mortified. i dont know how i will live not seeing his face at school everyday. i think i'll die. i have no clue what to do w/out him. hes the love of my life but its so hard to love him because he gives me mixed signals. Please, i need help. i dont know what to do. I LOVE HIM TOO MUCH, I THINK THERE SHOULD BE ANOTHER WORD OTHER THAN LOVE, LOVE ISNT ENOUGH. am i a freak? because i cry every night over this boy. its ok if you can't help me. i cant even help myself anymore im too deeply in love!!!!

Ok for one thing that's the cutest thing I've ever read! Lol.. and no you're not a freak ; you love him alot.. I understand. Believe me ; I've cried over guys before. Everyone does. But I REALLY REALLY think you should talk to him, because if you love him so much.. yeah, maybe you could have shown him you love him more.. I don't know what all you did for him/and said.. but here's examples.. like hug him alot, tell him you love him, get him gifts...but I don't know. Some people show love alot ; and some don't but they really do...like your situation. But really...you should let him know, ya know? Get it all off your chest about how you feel and everything and hopefully he'll feel the same way and theres a chance he will if it's on and off.. because if he's leaving, you gotta try and take this summer and make it the best that you can with him.. who knows? Maybe if it gets good enough you'll visit him every now and then. My one friends sister dated this guy like a state or 2 I think away and they dated for a long time and now they're one year wedding anniversary is coming up. Not saying you'll get married or anything, but if you guys love eachother enough.. you can make it work out. But seriously, I'd really really talk to this boy if I were you. Because if you don't say anything now, and he leaves.. you'll wish you did I'm sure. I hope I helped!!



Love,
MELii

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