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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

okay well me and my boyfriend live seperatly and we are currently expected our first child. He stays with his dad and I stay with my mom. Due to my job and my schooling I want to continue to stay here after the baby is born until we are able to afford something together. his house is to far of a drive for me to live there and he is not allowed to stay here because of my mothers beliefs. When the baby is born he of course wants to be there to help take care of it but I was wanting to bring it home with me. his dad has dogs and such and I wouldn't feel comfortable bringing a newborn baby in there until they cleaned it really well. He wants to be able to stay with me when the baby is just born to help me and I understand but i won't stay there right out of the hospital. what should i do? should I talk to my mother and see if she will let him stay a night or to or how should I explain it to him that I don't want to stay there with the baby just yet? he'd be heartbroken. I'm kind of in a rut.

I'd like to know how old you are also. I would also like to know what mom's beliefs are causing a problem. I can make a fairly good guess at what they may be. If I'm correct her problem may be a little like closing the barn door after the cow has run off.

As the father of the child, with some regard for your ages, he does have certain rights for the care and well being of his child. The two of you need to set down together with both your parents and work out an equitable solution for all concerned.

im 16 weeks pregnant and my significant other told me he had slept with someone else and she might have had chlamydia. he slept with her a month ago. my doctor appointment is until the 18th and I had planned on asking to get tested. is it okay to wait this long or should I got somewhere else and get it done before then?

Call your OB/GYN's office. Tell them you may have been exposed to Chlamydia. Ask them if they want to move up your appointment.

This is the doctor who is caring for you during your pregnancy. He or she needs to know everything about you medical condition during your pregnancy. Going to another doctor for an STD test or STD treatment is not in the best interest of you or your baby as your doctor is then not fully aware of your total medical condition.

Call the doctors office; explain to them as you have to us. Let them decide if they need to see you sooner or if you can wait until the 18th.

How old do you have to be to buy condoms in the unitited states

There is no age limit. Some store owners may restrict the sale of their own doing. If so they are in the wrong. You probably won't win the battle arguing with them just go to another store.

My friend cuts herself.She did a couple of years ago too,but stopped.She has started again.I noticed today in math on her wrist she had about 10 tiny slits.I asked her what happened,but she said her cat attacked her,but she looked and answered nervous.What should I do?

The best thing you can do is to tell your parents and ask that they tell her parents or tell a trusted teacher.

Cutting is dangerous, especially around the wrist. Cut in the wrong place and she can easily die as she can bleed out before help could arrive, even if it is unintentional to so hurt herself in that manner.

It is better to have a live friend who may be angry with you; then a friend who is dead and buried. Yes I am being blunt but I am not exaggerating as it can and has happened. If you are a good friend you will tell someone who can help her. Those people are your parents, a teacher or principal or her parents. Even telling a police officer is the right thing to do.

Hi thanks for reading (:
I have to do a project for school where I get to pick whatever I want. But it has to be something i can physically do. Anyway I want to fundraise for a charity. But I really dont know what charity to do it for. There are SO many problems in the world right now; poverty, abuse- to both humans and animals-, racism, starvation, dieases- cancer, alzhemiers-,etc.
How can I pick one when there is so many? I feel guilty picking one over another even though I cant help them all.

Thanks (:

You are very correct in what you say; that there are a lot of people and organizations that could use your help.

There is an old saying that "Charity Begins at Home." Now this can be interpreted many ways. One way I believe to interpret this is to chose a charity that some how the cause of which may have some impact on you, your family or your community.

If I were to be looking to chose a Charity the ones that I would look to chose from would be. "Susan B Kolman for the Cure;"as my wife is a recent Breast Cancer survivor. The Fallen Fire Fighters Foundation as both my son and I are Fire Fighters. The autism foundation as I know several people who's children suffer from Autism.

I could go on though I think you see the point I am making. These are the Charities that impact my life. You say the project has to be something you can do physically. To me this would be things like helping out at a food kitchen or food pantry, organize a food drive at school or in your neighbor hood. Some other things that may qualify could be reading to the elderly at a nursing home or senior citizens center.

Staying with something that is close to home, something that may have had a profound influence on your life I believe will give you the best chance of success with this project.

Good luck.

I am a girl and I have hair on my stomach. I want to get rid of it, but naturally, not by waxing or shaving. Is there anything that will help?

Before you do anything drastic I have a question. Do you happen to be on birth control?

We all have hair on our body it darkens and becomes noticeable at puberty in the area of your pubic region, arms, legs and arm pits. For men it is not unusual for the hair on their back, and chest stomach to darken and thicken. When it happens to a women their is some times a medical; reason or reason of heritage for this to happen.

My reason for asking about birth control is. If the stomach hair darkened and has become thicker since going on birth control. Then the answer may be a need to change birth control medication.

If there is no correlation or if you are not on birth control; there are natural, organic based, hair removal creams on the market today. You will find them in Vitamin shops and Health Food stores.

If you are looking for permanent hair removal there is no natural way that I am aware of. Electrolysis will permanently remove the hair. It is painful and expensive.

I really want harem/genie pants, but i can't find them in any teen stores which are in Canada or US. Can you possibly tell me stores that i might be able to find them in. Like forever 21, sirens, american eagle, below the belt. or something?

I was able to find many listings for harem/genie pants by doing a search on the web. Unfortunately the search did not turn up results for real store. All results returned were for virtual stores such as eBay.

Hi, I'm a teenage girl. i have acne on my face and I tried a lot of creams, but it doesnt go away. Do you have any suggestions?

Acne to my mind is a product of puberty and the reaction to the new hormones surging in you. How right I am is open for debate.

In any case if you have tried the over the counter medications without success then the only proper thing to do is to see a dermatologist. Family doctors can something offer some help but if a problem is persistent then a doctor who specializes in that area is the best doctor to seek out for treatment.

I would suggest you do what is called "DO DILLIGENCE" in finding a Dermatologist. That is to research the doctors in your area. An Internet search will show you where the doctor went to medical school, where they did there residency and how long they have been in practice. It will also show you if they are Certified by the Board of Dermatology which is important.

When I look for a specialist I try to find one who is Board Certified in that Specialty and who is young, maybe 5 years out of residency. I have found that younger doctors in general are more apt to look for a cause than treat the norm.

If you are covered by health insurance, your own or your parents; a visit to a Dermatologist is generally covered.

Hope this helps.

Hello i am a teenage and have acne on my chest. Do you know any ways to get rid of it?

Acne to my mind is a product of puberty and the reaction to the new hormones surging in you. How right I am is open for debate.

In any case if you have tried the over the counter medications without success then the only proper thing to do is to see a dermatologist. Family doctors can something offer some help but if a problem is persistent then a doctor who specializes in that area is the best doctor to seek out for treatment.

I would suggest you do what is called "DO DILLIGENCE" in finding a Dermatologist. That is to research the doctors in your area. An Internet search will show you where the doctor went to medical school, where they did there residency and how long they have been in practice. It will also show you if they are Certified by the Board of Dermatology which is important.

When I look for a specialist I try to find one who is Board Certified in that Specialty and who is young, maybe 5 years out of residency. I have found that younger doctors in general are more apt to look for a cause than treat the norm.

If you are covered by health insurance, your own or your parents; a visit to a Dermatologist is generally covered.

Hope this helps.

My boyfriend is 30 and I'm 23. We've been dating for almost 3 years now and have been living with each other for a year. In the beginning of our relationship we would have sex all the time. Usually 1-2 times a day. Now we have sex maybe once a week, if that, and I'm the one who initiates it. Just recently he started turning me down more and more. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. He's making me feel unloved & unattractive. Is there a way to increase his sex drive? I don't want to have to beg him for sex...

At thirty his sex drive should not be this low. Try to get him to see his doctor to have his testosterone levels checked as well as to be screened for depression. Work related stress can bring on what is called clinical depression.

I'm not sure what cause low testosterone but it is easily corrected with a pill. Clinical Depression is easily addressed as it is a loss or insufficient amount of a hormone that can also be addressed with medication. Talk therapy is also advised to find out what the trigger is and how best to address it.

Not being a doctor I cant make a diagnoses and even if I was I could not do so without examining your boyfriend. Just for your knowledge statistically 1 in 3 of us suffer from some form of clinical depression at some time.

What kind of man decides to be a gynocologist?

I can tell you that the wrong reason for becoming a gynecologist is because you think it is a great way to see naked women; or that you get to see, touch and feel woman's private parts all day. If those are the reasons you will not only be a bad doctor you will probably end up in jail.

Some of the right reasons would be that many gynecologists are obstetricians and they enjoy bringing new life into this world. They are caring men who have a unique ability to care for women who can be suffering from some terrible illnesses that men do not suffer with. That by being a gynecologist he can also be of help to men in an emergency as some of woman's internal anatomy and men's are the same.

A man that chooses this field for his life's work is a very special individual and a unique doctor. For this type of medicine can be as trying on the doctor as it is for the patient.

Hi, my name is Keana. I am 12. My parents won't let me have an email address and I'm in middle school. My older sister has one but she has bad grades. I don't have bad grades or an email address! All of my friends have one and I feel left out. Every time I try to talk to my parents, they seem irritated, but I just to talk about it. What do I do?

We parents can be a strange breed at times.

The fact that your sister has an Email account might have everything to do with the fact that she is older and nothing to do with the fact that she has bad grades. Then again it may have everything to do with her grades as email address are needed to sign into different websites she may be using to improve her grades.

The Internet was in its infancy when my son was 12 and I really can't say how I feel about a 12 year old having a email address. It is also wrong of me to say if your parents are right or wrong in not allowing you to have one. They are your parents not I.

I will say this to you. Today's technology is moving a lot faster then when your parents were your age. While they are probably more tech savvy then I am, as I am old enough to be their parent. You are probably more tech savvy then they are at this time. This is very troubling to us as parents and grandparents as it is hard for us to supervise that which we are not fully understanding of.

Remember one of our primary responsibilities to you as our children is to keep you safe from harm. How can we keep that promise if you know more than we do about something that can cause you great harm. Something we read in the newspaper or see on the evening news causing other peoples children harm. Remember an email address is more than just an email address. It is the key to the Internet gateway.

If they are having trouble supervising your sisters access to the Internet. Then I would say they are going to be very reluctant to allow you access as well. My advise will be not to badger them on this. As my mother use to tell me when I said others had something I wanted; "Does that mean if Billy jumps off the bridge you have to jump too." I never quite understood her meaning until later in life. So saying my friends all have one is not going to get you one.

You need to calmly find out what your parents true objection is to you having an Email address. As a salesman I can tell you that not Every objection is the real reason for saying no. You have to find out the real reason then you can work to overcome it. One way I can think of might be to ask mom, "Mom why do you think it is wrong for so & so's parents to allow her to have an email account. Mom may just let the real reason slip. Then you can work to overcome her problem.

so my boyfriend has been saying his bidy has been hurting, but the weird thing is that he onlys feels like this when hes at home or around his parents. He says him stomach hurts, his body aches, feels like he's going to throw up, and that it feels like he was to go #2 all the time but he doesn't. then when hes arouond me hes perfectly fine. i dont know whats wronge with him but i feel really bad and i want to help him. he also says that his heart hurts and sometimes the area around it hurts, if you have any ideas about why people tell me. thanks

Find out if just your boyfriend is feeling unwell when he is at home or if other members of his family also fell sick when at home. If other members of the family fell better away from home there could be a problem at home in the air quality that needs to be checked. The two most immediate are.

carbon monoxide - This is very prevalent this time of year as this is the time we turn on the heating system. The fire department can be called to check this as the have meters to do so. This is serious and life threatening if the levels get to high.

Mold contamination. Mold can cause people to fell ill. This requires an expect to mitigate and some times to find as it may be hidden behind walls.

If only your boyfriend feels sick then something at home is triggering an anxiety attack. Their is medication that can help with the attacks but he should seek therapy to get to the cause of the attacks.

We are both 13 and the oldest one is 15 he has a tatoo.while I was in school today 2 boys from my class approached me. The 13 year old boy pulled my hair all the way down. Then the 15 year old boy open my legs and started to rud my pussy. The other said hell yea and with one hand he pulled my hair back and with the other one he did the same as the 15 year old boy rud my pussy.15 year old with one hand ruded my pussy and with his other hand he ruded my legs up and down.This was during ElA class. They both whispered in my ears I want to do you. They stoped when my friend came in and said get the fuck off her.then they said I know where u live.Now what should I do about this. P.s. I like both of then so I liked it a little.what should I do I do not want to get them in trouble because I like them both.so what should I do. Can people please help me with this problem.

As a parent these are my feeling about what happened.

Based on your description regardless of your feelings for these boys; they sexually assaulted you. The also threatened to harm you when they said: "I know where u live; They both whispered in my ears I want to do you."

Not only have they threatened to do you harm, possibly RAPE you, they have committed real crimes in doing so, including the assault in school. You are fortunate your friend walked in when he/she did or who knows what would have happened.

You have a responsibility to yourself and other girls to stop these boys from doing this and worse to others. By saying they know where you live it could be construed that they are also threatening you to stay quiet. They are 15 they know what they did to you is wrong morally and wrong legally as well as getting them kicked out of school at the very least if you told a teacher.

You need to tell your parents what happened. They need to call the police. The police need to know the name of your friend who stopped them so they can interview the friend and confirm your complaint to them.

This is the morally right thing to do. How will you feel if one of these boys actually rape a friend of yours and you could have prevented it by telling your parents. By telling the police exactly what they did, where they did it to you and encouraging your friend to tell the police what they saw.

There's nothing online or in books that can help me. Everywhere it says "i stuff my bra because i want boobs" all that to make it bigger! Well i dont want it! i want it smaller. I think getting periods are gross. I did get mine today and i hate it. I dont think i can ever except it! Im athletic and i dont have the time for girl stuff! I hate everything to do with puberty! Make matters worse when i walk out everyday with my outfit my mom cant look at my face when i talk she stares at my shirt and its awkward! help!

Hi, I'm old enough to be your grandfather and I hope the wisdom that comes with being my age may be of some help to you.

Having watched my children, nieces, nephews and all their friends and now grandchildren going through puberty. I can tell you with a high level of confidence you are not alone in how you feel. I can't think of anyone of these kids I have watched grow into adults enjoy going through puberty. Unfortunately their is nothing that can be done to stop it. It is part of the cycle of life.

Puberty will not prevent you from enjoying those things in life you have come to enjoy. You will have to learn to adapt. Such as wearing a sports bra and learning to get comfortable with tampons rather than pads. When you are older and your period has become regular; if you feel the need to have more control over your period you can discuss with your doctor the different types of birth control pills on the market. Birth control pill are not just for the prevention of pregnancy. Some on the market will actually cause your period to only happen once every three or four months for a few days.

If you are having real problems that keep you from doing things because of the changes puberty is causing. Then you and your mother should talk to your doctor together. There are medications a gynecologist can prescribe to make things easier for you.

As far as having big breast are concerned: This is genetic and until you are 18 there is nothing you can do about it. Once you reach 18 and medically confirmed that puberty has passed, you can if you desire have a breast reduction surgery.

Also we have been together for a yr and a half now and this the first time ive had something from her but i will admit that i have had chlamyida before and i just took the meds. i wasnt given a shot though and this was before i met year but almost three years later if it was still in me why is it showing up now?

I don't know I'm not a doctor. These things I guess can lie dormant. Ask your doctor.

so your saying that we can just get it amongst ourselves? im not cheating on her and she says she is not cheatin on me. So have i went aout this the wrong way??? becaus i broke up with her because she is complaining that i dont trust her and got mad when i asked the to see the results her doctor gave her. she saidshe tested negative and she has been twice.

Read the information from the CDC I sent you. I can't say who gave it to who. she may have had it from a previous boyfriend. Right now she needs to see her doctor if you guys have been having unprotected sex and you are infected

I am head over heels in luv with a boy in my class Problem. I want to have sex with him SOOOOOOOO bad , and he kisses me and dry humps me and luv it but I wanna go ALL the with him, but we are both 11 what should I do?

I'll just add this to what the others have said. If you have to ask if something is right; then it is probably wrong.

If you have to ask if you should be doing something, then you probably should not be doing it.

took next choice last week after a sexual assault but my husband and i are planning ivf treatments this month, will next choice interfer with embryos sticking this month after transfer?

The Next Choice Pill is the Generic Name for the "Plan B Pill" or "Morning after Pill." From what I was able to learn about it the pill is nothing more then a very strong birth control pill The design of which is to prevent pregnancy when taken with in 72 hours. There was also a note that said it could be used as long as 120 hours after unprotected sex but is most effective up to 72 hours after sex.

My own reasoning says that the pill works similar to a birth control pill which would take time to both build up in your system to offer you full protection. Any medication that takes time to build up takes time to work its way out of your system as well.

By increasing the dosage to get you immediate protection the strength of which could offer effectiveness up to 5 days after having unprotected sex; tells me it would also take some time to work out of your system. Just how long that would be I could not say or even estimate. I'm not a doctor or a pharmacist.

My answer to you is based on my own deductive reasoning. Which tells me that I should advise you to speak to your doctor before starting IVF treatment. If the Next Choice Pill has any lasting effects it would then be reasonable to wait before starting these treatments.

Well i went to the doctor and got test for a std. the test results came back in and it was positive for Chlmydia. When i ask my girlfriend about it she said she had nothing and went to the doctor. however, i do not know if she went to the doctor because we dont sty in the same area and she said her status came back negative. all i can do is go off what she said. Adjacent to, i had sex with my girlfriend while she was heavy on her period and shortly after i started having irregularities. the first time i went to the doctor he said i had nothing and gave me some pills. so a time came again i had sex with my gf on her period when it was heavy again. then again the feeling came back. Could i have caught chlmydia from her that way? are is she having sex with someone else? i love her and want to believe her but i dont want to be with a cheater!!!

To learn more about Chlamydia I suggest you check out the information in the link I have provided. It is from the Center for Disease Control.

In a nut shell it is possible that your girlfriend is not cheating on you. Chlamydia is a very common disease found in sexually active young people and is very dangerous to the reproductive system. About 3% of the women screened who have the disease will not check positive for the disease.

The CDC recommends annual checkups for Chlamydia in sexually active people.

I would recommend that if your girlfriend wants to eventually have babies. She go back to her doctor and advise the doctor, preferably her GYN, that you are infected and that you two have unprotected sex.

The CDC recommends the use of condoms to prevent the spread of this disease.

http://www.cdc.gov/std/Chlamydia/STDFact-Chlamydia.htm

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