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by the way, im 13 years old. i asked my mom why kids like me cant have debit cards. shes like, "you have to work to get one". i understand that credit cards are loans, so you'd need to work to pay them off, and if a kid has it, its cause a parent pays for it. at least.. i think that could happen, right? anyways, debit cards you put your own money into it. i have about 200 dollars in my bank account, and im like, why cant i have a debit card instead of carrying all the money around? and my mom said to ask the people at my bank which is annoying cause i barely get chances to go there, so i need money a lot when i already have it, but i cant use it till we go to the bank. so it makes no sense.. my mom says you have to be working to have a debit card but that makes no sense cause like kids can even have more money than some adults with debit cards who work at like flippen mcdonalds! ugggh why? is it cause we're not responsible or something and would lose it? adults can lose cards too. and yeah.. this makes no sense to me. explain please.
As the person below said, anyone with a checking account can get a debit card. You don't have to have a job to get a checking account... you just need to have some money to deposit into the account. Banks usually require you to keep a certain amount of money in your checking account at all times (usually $100-200). If you're underage, you may need to get your parents' permission to open a checking account. Call your bank and ask them what their policies are on that. Don't be afraid... I'm sure they'll be very happy to explain it to you.
A debit card works the same way as a check... it takes the money directly out of your account. The main difference between a check and a debit card is: when you write a check, it can take a few days to "clear". The store has to send the check to their bank, then their bank sends it to your bank, and then your bank sends them your money. With a debit card, the money is taken out of your account immediately.
Now, the real issue here might be that your mom doesn't WANT you to have a debit card. She may be worried that you'd spend all your money right away... and since you're not working, you'd have no way to replace it. Having a debit card is basically like having your entire bank account in your wallet... and when you have all that money right there with you, it's really easy to spend it all fast! And it's not just "irresponsible kids" who do that... a lot of adults do that, too!
Now, if you can't convince your mom to let you get a checking account & debit card, there's actually another option. You could get a pre-paid card from Visa or American Express, using your own money. It's sort of like a gift card, but can be used anywhere.
Let's say you're going to the mall and want to bring $50, but don't want to carry around the cash. You go to the bank, take the money out of your account, and use it to buy the card. Your mom might go for that, because then you'd only be taking out a certain amount of money that you and she have agreed on.
Two of my best friends really don't get together well. Say their names are Kerry and Lucy. Kerry is spoiled. She gets everything she wants. I don't care about that though. She's still a great friend. Lucy does care about that though. They both got the same thing for Christmas. An Ipod Nano. From Kerry the story is that her parents told Lucy's parnets what they were getting Kerry for Christmas. Thats not what Lucy says though. Who should I believe? HELP!!!!!
Well, to be honest, what does it really matter? They both have their Ipod Nanos, so they should both be happy about it. Who cares how or why they both ended up getting one?
If your friends have problems with each other, they need to work it out between themselves. And you need to tell them that. Maybe you can write them each a note or message saying something like: "Both of you are my really good friends. I know you have disagreements sometimes, and I really hope you can work them out because I hate to see you two fighting. But it really makes me feel bad when you talk bad about each other. So please don't bring me into the middle of your arguements."
hey
14 - F
well a lot of my stupid femalefriends are getting mad at me for the most ridiculous reasons. so i'm down to even less femalefriends. i'm cool with that cause girls suck cause they cause so much drama.
well. i realized that it's a LOT easier for me to make guyfriends. it's just that, i have like, five guyfriends [only two female friends, haa] & like, they just feel sorta uncomfortable when i talk about other guys. & no, they all like another girl, not me. like, i say, "he's sooo hottt," & my friend is like, "ok..." & i don't WANT to make him uncomfortable but i can't really talk to my femalefriends about my crush & all.
so, i'm asking,
HOW DO I GET MY GUYFRIENDS TO LOOSEN UP AROUND ME? make them less uncomfortable? let them know they can talk about ANYTHING with me?
i'm not the type of girl who says, "ew" to everything cause i don't find many things gross, either.
thanks so much in advance :]
Well, I can see how some guys would be uncomfortable when you say that another guy is hot. For one thing, they probably don't know how to respond. What are they supposed to say... "Oh yeah, he IS hot!"??? (Hahaha) Girls usually don't have a problem saying another girl is pretty, but you won't find many guys who like to talk about another guys' looks. So if you want to talk about your crush with your guy friends, maybe just talk about how much you like the guy, or ask them for advice about him and stuff, but leave out the "hotness" factor.
Also, when you say another guy is hot, you might be making your guy friends a little jealous. Even if they truly just like you as a friend, they still might be wondering, "Doesn't she think I'M hot?" All guys have an ego and want to think they're attractive to girls, no matter what their relationship is with the girl.
It's true, guys can be a lot easier to be friends with than girls. But you have to remember, they're GUYS. No matter how close you get as friends, there will always be some differences between guys and girls!
Would you rather have a small room with a bathroom in it or a big room
Wow, that's a tough choice! I guess it would depend on how much "stuff" I had. Right now I have a ton of stuff and no place to keep it, so I need a big room to store it all. But if I had somewhere else like an attic or a basement to keep some of my stuff, then I'd rather have the smaller room with the bathroom in it.
okay so i'm not going to deny that i have really small boobs for my age. im 16 and im a 32A but i wear push up bras and im fine with that and whatever.
the problem is, when there's nothing there, a pushup bra gives you NO cleavage whatsoever. my sister, however, doesn't even need a push up bra and she has pretty good cleavage.
how can i stop this jealousy? its my YOUNGER sister and its really weird going to the beach. i mean shes already taller than me, now she has bigger boobs than me?
Just try to keep in mind that your sister can't help having bigger boobs. It's not like she made them that way on purpose... she just got a little lucky in the gene department. So try not to resent her for it.
And try to look at the bright side. There are a lot of benefits to having smaller breasts! For one thing... it's a lot easier to make small boobs look bigger (padded & pushup bras, certain style tops) than it is to make big boobs look smaller. And believe it or not, a lot of people with big boobs WANT them to look smaller. Trust me, I know, cuz I'm one of them. Sometimes big boobs can make you look fat... clothes don't look as good on you... they get in the way sometimes... and sometimes guys treat you like you're just a pair of big boobs with legs.
So yeah... try to be happy with what you've got. And if it really bothers you, there's always surgeries to make them bigger.
why do i think when im in pain suicide is the only way out
You think it's the only way out because you can't see any other way. Or maybe you can see other ways, but suicide seems like the easiest. But it's obviously not the best, because you will miss out on so many great things! And trust me, those great things WILL happen. Things may be bad right now, but they won't stay that way forever. I can promise you that. Life is full of ups and downs, and even though the down times can be really awful, things always have a way of getting better. Just keep telling yourself that as you ride out the bad times, and you'll come out on the other side being a stronger person.
The week of August 20th I am taking vacation. My mom wants to go visit one of my aunts who lives in Cape Cod. We were talking about dinner time at restaurants up in Cape Cod. My mom says that I should order what I am going to eat and eat what I order. I took this to mean that I should eat everything on my plate. So I said to her that you cannot control the portions given to you at a restaurant and does she expect me to eat everything on my plate.
My mom said she does not expect me to eat everything on my plate, but what she is saying is that I should not order five items if I only want four items or order the five items and only take two bites and leave the rest over. She told me that sometimes I order three vegetables and then I take two bites of one of them and say I cannot eat it because the vegetable is too soggy.
I told my mom her original comment sounded like she was telling me I should eat everything on my plate and she repeated that isn't what she was saying.
Later on when we were eating dinner in our dining room she said to me you can eat what you want you can do what you want.
My question would you think her original comment was telling me to eat everything that is served to me at a restaurant. If yes why yes and if no why no
I think what your mom is saying is to be sure to order something that you know you'll like, and be able to eat... maybe not all of it, but at least a good portion of it. She's probably worried about your aunt paying for an expensive meal, and feeling that she's wasted her money if you just take a few nibbles of it. Actually, your aunt probably wouldn't feel that way, but your mom might be worried that she would.
well see ive been with my boyfriend 4 almost 8 months. I love him 2 death. I hope he loves me i mean he tells me he does but i dont like him goin to the mall or anywhere without me. im afraid that he might find someone else.
idk im jealous i guess. will someone please help/
WHAT DO I DO???
Well, everyone else has given you some very good advice, so I only have one more thing to add. If you act jealous and over-possessive, and keep your boyfriend on a short leash, you might end up driving him away. Let him have some freedom. If he loves you, he'll stick with you.
i met this girl [jen] on wednessday at school. we started talking and i thought that she was pretty cool right away. we went to the mall on friday with some other ppl and it was fun. the problem is that she wants to be BFF's when ive only known her for like 5 days!!! i have other friends that ive known for much longer. i really dont want to be mean to her because i do want to be friends with her. but she said she wanted to write something nice about me so i gave her my myspace info. then she changed my name to "jen and sam true friends forever!!". she wants to have identical profiles but i told her that i thought itd be better to have them different. i dont know what else to do. she put a default pic of me and her and made her name "sam and jen friends forever" and calls me "best friend" in class. i need my personal space! i dont like being invaded and i feel like shes controling me. please help. thanx
sam 14/f
Wow, it sounds like this girl really likes you and is really happy that she's found a new friend! Perhaps she doesn't have a whole lot of other friends (maybe because she scares them away by acting the way she's acting with you). Obviously, you don't want to hurt her or make her feel bad. But you're right... it can be really hard dealing with someone who is that possesive!
You may have to distance yourself from her a bit. Still talk to her and do things with her if you want to, but make sure she knows that you have other friends and that you can't spend all your time with her.
As for the myspace thing... you need to tell her that you want to change it. But you can do it in a nice way. Maybe you can send her a message saying something like: "I hope you don't mind, but I think I should change my name back to ____. We're definitely good friends, but I usually don't like to put one person's name on my myspace because I don't want to hurt my other friends' feelings."
Good luck!
ok so this guy and me have been bff since forever!!
so recently i started to like him and i told him he said he thinks he likes me too..
only thing is he has a gf
he has been sayin for over a month that he is gonna break up with her but when ever i ask about it now he trys to avoid the subject.
he has been flirting alot lately
and we have gotten more "physical"
and he keeps tellin me how he loves me and doesnt want to lose me.
then why wont he break up with M??
i need help does he like me or should i just go back to being friends?
Well, it looks like this guy is not ready to break up with his girlfriend. There may be a couple different reasons for that:
1) Maybe he wants to break up with her, but is afraid of hurting her, and hasn't worked up the courage to do it yet.
2) Perhaps he still likes her, but likes you too, and isn't sure what he wants to do.
3) Or Maybe he has no intention of leaving his girlfriend, and is stringing you along because he doesn't want to hurt you. Or because he's a dog and wants to have his cake and eat it too.
Whatever the case is, I think you should back off for a while until he figures out what he wants. Remember, no matter what he tells you, he IS taken right now, so essentially he is still off limits. If he truly likes you and wants to be your boyfriend, he'll eventually break up with his girfriend and go out with you.
15/f
I have a friend, who is the biggest ditz ever. I love her and all, and I can be a pretty big ditz myself. But, I do know proper english. I'm not the best, but I'm not stupid, at all. An example of how stupid she is, is the word 'rational.' She thought it had something to do with the goverment... see what I'm dealing with? How do I cope with her? Shes so much fun to hang out with, but when it comes to 'big words' as she puts it, its impossibleee talking to her.
What should I do?
Your friend might not be as ditzy as she appears. Some girls get the idea that it's cute or funny to be an air-head, so they act like ding dongs in order to get attention. Usually it's just a phase and they eventually grow out of it.
Or maybe your friend really isn't that bright when it comes to certain things. We all have our talents & strengths, as well as our weaknesses and shortcomings.
Either way, that's just the way your friend is right now. But obviously she has some other traits that you really like. If you enjoy hanging out with her, try to look past her ditziness and enjoy the qualities that you like about her.
my parents are literally forcing me to go places I don't want to go and do things I don't want to do. All the time. 24/7. I am seriously getting sick of it. My sister doesn't have to go anywhere she doesn't want to only because she doesn't want to.
Like now, for example. My family JUST got back from tubing in this river which was supposed to be only one hour long, but turned out to be six hours. Then we went to a family reunion which was seriously boring because I sat in the same place for 4 or 5 hours doing nothing.
And now, I am FORCED to get up early and FORCED to go to a water park all day with cousins that I don't even like, and FORCED to spend the night with them. No options.
What I'm trying to ask is, can my parents just take complete control over my life like that and force me to do whatever they want me to do? And also, what can I say to my parents to get out of the water park tomorrow?
They are seriously wasting my time... It's getting so old. Please help me!
Yes... as long as you're underage and living in their house, your parents CAN take complete control of your life and force you to do things. I know it stinks, but unfortunately that's just the way it is.
Actually, even when you're in a situation you can't control, you do have two choices. You can get mad and fight and argue about it (which is probably a losing battle and will just make you even more miserable)... or you can accept the fact that you have to do it, and try to make the best of the situation.
It might help to look at things from your parents point of view. They probably aren't forcing you to do these things just to torture you. They're making you do it because they think it's important, or because it's one of those obligations that we all have to do sometimes.
Your cousins, for example. Perhaps your aunt & uncle are really wanting all of you to spend some time together, and even though your parents know you don't like it, they don't want to cause problems with their family.
And the tubing and other things your parents are making you do with them. They probably realize that it won't be long before you're off to college or moving out, and they want to spend as much time with you as they can while you're still around. So they plan things to do with you that they think might be fun.
The fact is, even once you've moved out and are on your own, there will ALWAYS be things you have to do, that you'd rather not. The sooner you can get used to that idea, and learn how to accept it, the happier you'll be. =]
so im friends with these kids right. and yeah.um.
they have like all these different bonfires and im NEVER invieted and i feel like shit because im not invited and its not like they dont know that im mad. i mean my away messages are always nasty when they have a party or whatever. so yeah i dont know how to like fix this problem and its bugging the hell out of me. okay thanks for the help bye.
15/f
Well, leaving nasty away messages probably isn't going to get you invited to the next bonfire, or to anything else for that matter. Have you ever heard the saying, "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar"? It means that people prefer being around someone who's sweet and pleasant, not someone who's sour and nasty. If you want people to like having you around, you need to stop being the vinegar and start being the honey. You want people to include you in things because they like you, because you're nice and fun to have around... right? Not because they're afraid of how mad and mean you'll be if you're left out!
And speaking of being left out... it's completely normal to feel a little sad or jealous when you aren't included in something. Everyone feels that way sometimes, because everyone gets left out of things from time to time. It's just impossible for people to do things with ALL their friends EVERY single time. But that doesn't mean they don't like the friends they aren't with at the moment.
When you're the person who's left out (as we all are sometimes), of course you're going to feel a little sad. But if you want to be invited the next time, you need to control those feelings. Keep them to yourself and don't make your friends feel bad or guilty. No one likes to be around someone who makes them feel bad. Be happy and cheerful and fun to be around, and next time they make plans, they'll want you to join them!
my parents are normaly pretty cool about stuff but i have a good [guy] friend who lives realllly far away so when he comes over i want him to stay over night. they say no because theyre paranoid or whatever. i wouldnt dare do anything with him, but its retarded to make him leave the day he comes down and im pretty sure he wouldnt be able to stay anywhere else. can anyone help me think of valid points to say to them? ive tried telling them the fact that he lives far away and stuff and they just arent listening to it. thanks in advance.
Well, you might be able to convince your parents that nothing would happen, but even if they trust you, it still might not be enough. They're probably worried about what other people will think about the situation. They might be imagining their friend or neighbors whispering, "Oh my gosh, can you believe they let their daughter have a BOY sleep over??" If that's one of their worries, there may not be anything you can do. However... maybe they'd be okay with your friend staying over, if you spend the night at a friend's house while he's there. If everyone knows you aren't sleeping in the same house together, your parents might feel more comfortable with it.
I have a bad probelem. Ok. so I have been datting this boy for almost 9 months. And three days ago I have started talking to this new guy. he used to be really mean in school but now he is all sweet. and he told me that my hair is beautiful and he give's out a lot of complements. and he is so sweet and told me changed. and we talked on the phone last night tell 4:00 in the morning. and talked about people in our school who we would make out with. and I aksed him this girl and me and he said me. so.. I like this guy a lot but yet I love my boyfriend.I just kinda want a change beucase I have been with this kid for 9 months! and I dont know what to do. Im scared if me and the new guy go out and then he will dump me and I will miss my old boyfriend. I just really dont know what to do. Please help me !
Thankks a lot
xoxoxox
Fe-male 13
Your situation is pretty common! It happens to just about everyone, and it will probably happen to you again many times throughout your life.
As you said, you love your boyfriend. But the fact is, even when you really love someone, it's possible to be attracted to someone else... especially if they're attracted to you. It doesn't mean you love your boyfriend any less; it's just a normal thing that sometimes happens. It can even happen when you're happily married! Being in a relationship doesn't stop you from noticing other guys or enjoying their attention. And it always makes you feel good to know that you're attractive to someone!
When you find yourself in that situation -- when you're in a relationship but have a chance to be with someone else -- you basically have three choices:
1) If you think you'll be happier with the other person, you can break up with the guy you're with and give the new guy a try. You may be happier, and you may not. It's always a risk. Only you can decide whether it's a chance worth taking, based on your feelings for your current boyfriend.
2) You can stay with your boyfriend and secretly see the other guy while you make up your mind who you like better. Obviously, that would be cheating, and that's never a good choice!
3) If you're really happy with the guy you're with, and don't want to risk losing him, then you need to learn how to handle this kind of situation. You'll need to tell yourself, "It feels good to know that I could be with this other guy, but I'm not going to act on it." You may have to force yourself to stop thinking about him, and make an effort to avoid him for a while. You may even want to tell him how you feel: that you find him attractive, and you're flattered by his attention, but that you're happy with your boyfriend and don't want to risk losing him.
Number 3 can be pretty hard to do, but it's an important thing to learn. Some people never learn it; they go through life jumping from one relationship to another, always looking for excitement, but never being truly happy.
Of course, you're a teenager right now, and this is a time when it's normal to date different guys. That's how you learn what type of person you want to be with in the long run. But that doesn't mean you should give up your boyfriend if you really do love him. There will be lots of cute, nice guys who will want to make out with you, but finding one who really loves you and will stick with you isn't so easy. It would be better to end your relationship because you're just not happy anymore, rather than just because you have a chance with another guy.
i've been going out with my boyfriend for three months. My parents don't approve of his family though so if i wanted to go to his house i'd lie to my own parents about where i was going and then sneak over to his house. Last time i went there i felt so guilty i felt i was gonna be sick. And lately whenever i talk to him i get really irritated and grumpy. Does anyone know what's going on with me?
Well, as you said, you're feeling really guilty about being dishonest with your parents. And this guilt is starting to affect the way you feel about your boyfriend. You don't like lying to your parents, but in order to be with him, you have to lie... and of course that's going to make you irritable and grumpy. It's also possible that in some part of your mind, you're wondering if your parents might be right... and that's making you uncomfortable around him.
If you really like this guy, and if you think your parents have misjudged him, then you need to talk to your parents about it. Ask them to give your boyfriend a chance, to get to know him better, before they make a judgement on him. They still might not want you going to his house, but maybe they'll let him come over to your place, or let you get together with him someplace else.
I found a kitten the other day at work, I think it was dropped off there. It is infested with fleas they are all over him. I have given him the treatments that you squirt stuff behond there necks, I have given him a flea bath but they are still all over him. What else can I do to get rid of the fleas. I feel bad because I am leaving him in a rabbut cage thats pretty big in the garage, because I don't want to bring him in the house and get all my other animals infested, so what else can I do to eliminate all these little critters? Any help would be very appriciated! Fast Too!
Take him to the vet. They'll be able to give him a flea bath with stuff that is much stronger than what you buy at the store. If you can't take him to the vet, though, give him another bath with the flea stuff you have, and then get a flea comb and comb him out really good. The flea combs are sold at most grocery stores for about $2.00 and they really work well!
in peoples myspace surveys like 3 ppl whos ive looked thorought have had this:
7. Do you believe in love at first sight? lust
anyone know the significance to love at first sight and lust?
I think what they're saying is that "love" at first sight doesn't really exist... that if you have strong feelings for someone at "first sight", it's acutally lust, not love. They mean that lust is the strong physical attraction and longing for someone, whereas love is a deeper, more meaningful emotion that can only be developed over time.
16/f
My boyfriend and I had sex. His parents found out, how they found out is a long story that wouldn’t mean much to you. Anyways…to the point; I have never been so embarrassed in my life. Does anyone have a story, about their parents or this partners parents finding out, to share with me, so I don’t feel so dumb? Or any story at all that is. It’s silly I know, but I need something that helps me know... I’m not the only one whos parents have found out. Thanks :)
Oh my gosh! It was the first time I had sex. My boyfriend took me to his house after a party, and afterwards we fell asleep in his bed. We were woken up the next morning by his dad... who just happened to be my history teacher!!! Ahhhhhh!! I wished I could've just died right there!!!
And then a few years later... I was living with my dad in this old farm house he was restoring, and my boyfriend would stay over whenever my dad was out of town. One day we started having plumbing problems, and the plumber had to do this major 5-hour operation to clean out the sewage system. Afterwards, my dad told me what the problem was: condoms that had been flushed down the toilet, filled up with air and clogged everything up!! Yeah, pretty dang embarrassing!
Now I can look back on it and laugh... and one day you will, too. But I know, it's really embarrassing right now!
Ok well me and my bf have been together for 4 yrs. now and like at times he treats me really bad.. he yells at me and throws things. but then at times he can be the nicest person ever.. i am just so confused, he puts me down all the time and stuff like that. but then like 20 mins later he is all nice and lovey dovey with me. and i really dont no what to do. he says he love me but i really wounder sometimes, ive tried talking to him about it but when i do he gets mad.. what do you thihnk i should do??
I'm sorry to say it, but I think you should end this relationship. Guys like that don't change; in fact, they usually just get worse over time. And if you get married and have children, he will probably act the same way towards them. So even if you think you can tolerate his behavior towards yourself, I'm sure you wouldn't want your kids to suffer that kind of abuse.
The problem is that somewhere deep inside, your boyfriend is insecure and unhappy with himself. For whatever reason, he thinks he's not good enough for you. And his biggest fear is that one day you'll see his faults and think, "What am I doing with this guy? I'm better than him and I could find someone better."
So that's why he puts you down. He wants you to feel bad about yourself, take away your confidence and self esteem, so you'll never think you're better than him. He wants you to think you're a terrible person who no one else would ever love, so you'll have to stay with him. He wants you to believe that he's the only guy who would ever love such an unworthy person.
If you continue to stay with him, you may start to believe that, and it will get harder and harder to break away. The truth is, you DO deserve better than this, and you WILL find someone who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. A true loving relationship is about supporting each other and building each other up, not tearing each other down.