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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
my boyfriend and i had sex last week of murch, but it was not intercourse. he was rubbing outside my vigina. i did have my period as usual, can that make me pregnent?
There are several reasons why you didn't get your period. The first is that there is the slight possibility you are pregnant, I will explain.
The other is that being stressed out over the possibility of being pregnant has caused you to miss your period. This does happen. A third reason would be if you were sick anytime during your cycle and were on antibiotics as this has been known to cause a women to miss her period.
The last reason would be if you have suddenly start to heavily exercise. Female Olympic athletes who train heavily do not get their periods while training. They are also usually under developed for their age until they stop training.
I think you know it only takes on sperm to make you pregnant. If your boyfriend came outside you anywhere near your vagina it has been known for the sperm to make their way inside and cause a pregnancy. It is rare but it has happened. Given the amount of time that has passed since you last period a home pregnancy test would settle this for you.
A far better reason is stress. Regardless of your age a women's cycle is a delicate thing. Even someone your mothers age if placed under enough stress can be late or miss a period altogether.
My advice is to get a home pregnancy test kit and follow the instructions on the package. You don't need moms permission to purchase one. Once you have tested you can simply take the evidence and discard it away from home. If it is negative you have nothing to worry about and your stress should go away. IF your period doesn't return in the next cycle period then you need to see a GYN for something else may be wrong.
I have never wanted children. My entire life I have never felt that urge to mother, but I've recently found myself thinking about it more often. My boyfriend does want children, and its something we have talked pretty seriously about. Just trying to see it from each others point of views.
I don't know if I want kids now because my boyfriend does, or if its something else. I'm 22 and I just recently got promoted at my job, and my boyfriend is 28 and just enrolled in his doctorate programs, on top of having a full time job. It just wouldn't be a smart thing to do right now. Idk what I'm asking, I guess its more of an "is it normal to all the sudden have these feelings?" Kind of question...please help
I can think of a number of reasons why it would be normal for you to suddenly think of wanting to have a child especially if this relationship is headed for marriage.
When we are young we, some of us, put together a life plan. That life plan has certain goals we want to achieve in life. Is it possible that your life plan did not see marriage as a possibility or this early in your career?
It was also possible that while you may have had a good childhood you did not have a great childhood and felt it would be wrong to bring a child into this world based on your own childhood? Now in talking with your boyfriend your seeing the world through a different set of eyes. This would be a good thing as it means you are also open to new thinking.
Having a child does not have to upset your life plan just a slight alteration to it to allow for pregnancy and child birth. As well as the care you need to provide to your child. Today that responsibility is a 50/50 thing. Your boyfriend/father slash hopefully future husband, is just as responsible for child care as is the mother.
One piece of advice I will offer though is that with both of you having a full time job and him working on his doctorate as well. This may not be the time to be thinking about having a child. If marriage is in the future for you two that should come first as that is not and should not be a disruptive force in either of your lives right now. A child on the other hand no matter how good a baby the child may be is a disruption in the early years as they are totally dependent on their parents. Your boyfriend should finish his doctorate before you two plan on having children. At least that is what I advise.
Short answer to your question: I see nothing abnormal in having a change in feelings on this subject.
I want to learn my times tables. I have been writting them down once or twice a day but want to really ramp up. My lecturer at college said she used to have some times tables songs. Does anyone know where I can get my hands on a free copy?
I loaded the following question into my yahoo search engine; "free times tables songs for educators" A number of sites were returned with songs that could be downloaded. If you do the same you should be able to choose the ones you want.
I would love to hear from some guys about your opinions on what makes a good sex partner. What do you like/don't like that girls do? Thanks!
What makes a good sex partner is not what he/she is willing or not willing to do in bed. It is not even how good he/her technique may be in what he/she does in bed.
What makes a good sex partner as well as a good life partner are one in the same. It is a person, and this can be either partner male or female in a heterosexual relationship, or either partner in a gay relationship; who is willing to communicate with their partner.
When two people can communicate on all levels including their sexual wants, needs and desires; you have a good partner. A good partner will not reject something out of hand just because they have never done it before.
When it comes to sex it is a learned activity. No two people like the same thing done the same way. If you have an open communication then you can learn from each other how to please each other. When we first start to have sex most of us know only one position the missionary position. Try not to reject any other positions out of hand just because they are new to you. The same with different fetishes. Most are harmless and quite fun.
The ability to communicate with others is the key to success in life. Be it communication at work, in the home or in the bedroom.
So.. I am pregnant with a man who was disfellowedshipped from jw. We continued dating... And now I am pregnant. He was cheating on me and we are no longer dating. He is now trying to retun to jw religion. He has bern attending meetings... But has not told them that I am pregnant. Should I contact the elders and tell them?
There are two ways I can read this question. The first is that you feel you need to tell the elders out of revenge for him leaving you when you are pregnant and for cheating on you. If this is the reason then no good will be served by you going to the elders.
The other reason I see is that he has not taken responsibility for the pregnancy and is not supporting you and will not support the baby when it is born. If this is the reason you feel you need to go to the elders then I support your reason.
I also suggest in the strongest possible manner that you see a lawyer to have the proper legal documents drawn up to have the court order him to support the child as required by law.
By law he is financially responsible for the child until the child's 18th birthday. This includes contributing for food, shelter, schooling and medical expenses including having the child on his employers supplied health insurance.
Right now your best interest and the best interest of your baby is to first find a lawyer and have the legal paper work done. Speak to the lawyer about whether it is prudent to inform his church elders. If the lawyer feels it is then let the lawyer do so by letter to the elders.
How much does the medicine,cost for the abortion
If you go to the following URL you will learn everything you need to know about the abortion pill The cost, the effective rate and when it can be taken.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/abortion/abortion-pill-medication-abortion-4354.asp
Where can I hide condoms in my room?
I use to hide them in my gym bag in my gym shoes. No mother ever looks in her child's gym shoes. My son hid them under his water bed thinking my wife would never find them,she did as did my mom. There is really no safe place that mom will not find them if she goes hunting for them.
If mom or dad goes hunting for your condoms it is because they believe your sexually active and want some form of verification. You would be surprised what we parents know about our children.
Should they find your stash they may be relieved and do nothing. They may confront you about it. They may do as I did with my son when my wife found his stash. Even though we already had that father son discussion we had another one were I attempted to find out more about his sexual activity and to pass on some words of wisdom about be sexually active at his age. He was 16 almost 17 at the time.
My advice as I gave to my son. Regardless of your age, which by asking this question says your too young to be engaging in sexual intercourse. You should abstain from sexual intercourse until you are much older and mature enough to understand fully the consequences of your actions in this regard. There are many other forms of sexual relief that can be had and given to and for both of you that does not have the risks that came with sexual intercourse.
My mom doesn't get it. All she does it put me down calling me ungrateful, stupid, and sometimes tell me to shut up. I wish she were a little more understanding. I've been to so many school counselors for advice and they just referred me to family counseling- in which now I have a case worker but I feel like there's no progress. My case worker then referred me and my mom to a psychologist.
When I got my report card a few months back, my mom flipped when I failed one class and saw that I was late or didn't even go to school. I was scared for the new quarter to come in the mail since I was still going to school late but I was failing three. I mentioned this worry to my psychologist on Saturday and she helped me break it down to my mom. In that same session, I was referred to a psychiatrist so that I can recieve an antidepressant.That same day she recieved the grades in our mail box but didnt say anything whatsoever. Sometimes she doesnt say a word, but other times she has too much to say/yell to me about. I wish she understood me. I was a 93 average student yet now I am a barely passing sophomore, failing 3 classes this marking period. Its like every time I push myself out there and try to get motivated, I feel like I fail more and more. When I miss school, it's so I can catch up but every time I enter school, Im even more behind due to absences. I was a motivated bright girl with a good future ahead of me. It were as if my depression took over my entire life and is controling as if I were a puppet controlled by strings. I miss the old me. I want to be good again, having healthy emotions but my world doesn't have a sun anymore, for its a cave of darkness closing in on me.
Having suffered from depression myself one thing you said stood out for me; "It were as if my depression took over my entire life and is controlling as if I were a puppet controlled by strings. I miss the old me." This is exactly what depression is and does to a person.
I can also attest to the fact that there is light at the end of the tunnel. The medications the psychiatrist prescribes will help along with continued talk therapy both singularly with your psychologist and jointly with you mom there.
Typically the medications prescribed are a form of hormone replacement for the majority of clinical depression is caused by the lack of one or two hormones secreted into the brain which help control moods. This plus stress are the major factor in depression. It will take the medication about two weeks to build up in your system and you may have to increase the dosage slowly as well. Once you reach the clinical dosage, or better yet, as you build to the clinical dosage building in you. You should start to feel better and see things differently.
Right now everything you see is clouded or distorted by the depression., Meaning you are not thinking clearly and this causes you to feel bad and deepens your depression. You can even feel real pain from this.
What is important is to be compliant with your medications. Take them as directed and to be truthful with the psychiatrist as to how they are helping or not helping. I had my medications changed twice before they really kicked in. Each helped a little but the third medication was like someone opened a window.
Next your psychologist is your new best friend. You can tell him or her, when in individual counseling, anything and everything you need to, want to or is bothering you. Confident that what you say in therapy stays in therapy. Nothing gets back to mom or dad or anyone else. That is by law.
When you are in joint therapy the counselor will help you or lead you into discussions with your mother on those things you would have agreed to in individual therapy. This is done to protect you from your mothers anger or whatever backlash she might come up with.
It takes time, it doesn't happen over night. You didn't become depressed over night either. Commit to the help that is being given to you work with the doctors and as I said in the beginning; there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you will return to the world you want to be in.
sometimes I feel like it's my fault because I gave in
Rape is never the victim's fault. There is nothing you did was great to happen is nothing you could've done to stop it if you didn't given you could've been more perk. What you do now is take the proper legal action to have him punished and sent to jail and hopefully he will learn his lesson by taking this action as I said hopefully you will prevent some other woman from having to go through what you've gone through or even dying so that makes you a hero
There is an organization called RAINN. It stands for Rape, Abuese, Insest , National Network. This organization is founded to help victims of rape incest and abuse but finding people in your own neighborhood who can help you overcome these traumas. They operate a 24 hour hotline you can call for suppor. unfortunately I'm not at my computer and I don't have their phone number but you can look them up on the web and I suggest you do so and you give a call. They can and will help you
I will talk to my mom and she if she can take me to the police department and file charges for rape because I don't want this done to someone else
I agree with your mom . He deserves whatever the police and prosecutors decide to do. you are a victim you did not deserve this and you should have no regrets over this.
I didn't think about rape charges because I gave consent but it is true I only had sex with him to get him to stop asking for it . some times he would even hit me if I didn't
By what you have written which is the only way I can evaluate things. You have defined what is considered under the law as rape in a degree less than first degree rape.
Even though you consented you did so under duress, that is the definition of rape in less than the first degree. You say so in this question to me now.
"some times he would even hit me if I didn't" This is consenting under force or duress, this is rape and you have five years in most states under which you can bring rape charges against him.
Speak to the DA or states attorney for your city or county or the police and they can explain it in more detail. As I see it by what you have explained to me you hold his future in the palm of your hand. While you may not think of it as rape the law does. He may not think of it as rape but he has a rude awaking coming if you wish to charge him.
All you really need to do is make him aware that he has committed a felony and real jail time is a possibility for him. The choice is his that you are willing to back off and not charge him if he will simply go away and leave you and your family alone.
My advice is that you do bring charges against him for you have been lucky. Other than being forced to have sex with him you didn't want to have you have not been physically harmed. The next girl may not be so lucky. By bringing charges against him you may just be saving some girls life.
I am a 24 female and my ex is a 20 year old. He lives with his mom and dad and I live with my mom if that helps any. we only dated 7 months I broke up with him for several reasons .
reason number 1: He was constantly trying to talk me into having sex with him even though I told him I wanted to wait till marriage because I was trying to get my life right at time but he finally succeeded and talked me into it. He did this by saying things like I could always get sex from some girl in another town and looking to have sex with people he meets off of face book I saw the ad he posted my self.
reason number 2 is because he was emotionally abusive . If I said no he would yell at me and call me sorry .
he would also make me give all my money to him when I got my pay check and now when we have been broke up for a little over a year now he is harassing me . He does this by calling my mom's cell phone because I have gotten a number because he wouldn't leave me alone . I blocked him on face book. I have even called the police and all they did was warn him and I have a new boyfriend now who says that if he doesn't leave me alone he can't handle it anymore and will break up me what should I do please help me.
From what you have written I would say you have a fair chance at bringing either sexual harassment, harassment and possibly even a rape charge against him. I say possible rape for as I read what you wrote It sounds as if you consented only to stop the harassment. This to me is not consent and in most states is consider rape in a lesser degree, 3rd or 4th.
You have several choices here. You can if you wish simply communicate to him that the sex you had with him by law is not considered consensual and is therefore rape. That if his harassment of you and your family does not stop immediately you will bring rape charges against him.
Another choice is to contact you local states attorney or district attorneys office and discuss with them harassment, sexual harassment and the possible rape charge and see what charges they are willing to bring, sign the charge sheet and leave the rest to the courts to handle.
Last you can contact a lawyer or your local legal aid office for help. They can advise you as to what your options are. AT THE VERY LEAST ON OF THEIR LAWYERS CAN SEND HIM A LETTER EXPLAINING TO HIM WHAT YOUR OPTIONS ARE AN TO HELP YOU FILE AN ORDER OF PROTECTION AGAINST HIN.
I play goalie for soccer and yesterday we had a game. Long story short, I was on the ground and a girl came in and kneed me in the nose. It didn't bleed, but it was painful. My nose started dripping clear liquid but I don't have a cold so it wasn't just a runny nose. My nose hurts a lot today and when I rub it, it makes a clicking sound. Do you think it's broken? I can't go to the doctor because my family doesn't have insurance. Please help!
YES you may have a broken nose and the clear fluid may be something other than nasal congestion. It very well could be spinal fluid that surrounds your brain leaking past where your nose is broke.
This is very much a life threatening injury if this is what I suspect has happened. I very well could be wrong but to rule this out an x-ray or MRI needs to be done.
You do not need insurance to be seen at any hospital Emergency Room for this injury. First because no hospital can turn anyone away without first providing the appropriate level of care for their complaint. Second if you are playing in a recreational league they have insurance to cover these injuries and last their are federal programs to cover young peoples health care.
To be short and to the point. Tell your parents that clear fluid is leaking from your nose since you were kicked. If they do not seem to concerned tell them what my concern is. They can verify this with a phone call to your family doctor if you have one or to the hospital Emergency room. Then they should take you to the emergency room or call 911 for help. Yes I believe it is that urgent since I am not a doctor and even if I were I would want to error on the side of caution and have either and x-ray or MRI done to either confirm or allay my concern.
i just want to know the reason for the irregular periods , sumtimes , it did get it for 2mnths and even 3 mnths and even for 6 mnths as well , last time i visited doc and they mentioned for sume test and its all clear , but have some infection .
and i working in a call centre and i do smoke as well but drink is occasionally , but m really worried as this will effect my pregnancy or ot ,coz m married . I want to get the menuration cycle to be fixed as it frm past 2 yrs now , its even un usual .
This is one of those question that I do not think any of us can help you with. As far as I know none of us are doctors and even if we were it would be wrong to diagnose your problem without examining you which cannot be done over the web.
Since your present doctor, hopefully a GYN, cannot find anything wrong I would suggest seeking a second opinion from another doctor.
In seeking a second opinion I would suggest if there is a hospital that has a school of medicine attached to it in your area or a level on trauma center in your area that these be the places you go seek a second opinion from. Doctors in shall we say community practice have a tendency to look for pickles in the pickle barrel. Where as in teaching hospital and most trauma centers are a teaching hospitals, as they generally have residents and fellows on staff. These young doctors keep their supervising doctors on their toes as the young doctors are always looking to impress their teaching doctors and look for the Hearing in the pickle barrel.
This is not to say that the community doctors are bad doctors. They are not, it is they see the same complaints day in and day out and become a bit complacent in their practice. It takes them longer to sometimes to dig deeper when their treatment plans don't do as expect, to try something else.
If there are hospitals as I mentioned in your area call the patient referral line and speak with the referral specialist. Give them as much as you know about your complain and they will make an appointment for you to meet with one of their doctors during the doctors clinic hours.
I had to do this with a now chronic problem I have that alluded my family doctor who I have a great deal of trust in after I was involved in a traffic accident. My problem turned out to be something that required a specialty well beyond what one would have even thought to seek help from but the referral specialist upon hearing my complaint knew which specialist I needed to see. My problem can=not be corrected surgically but with a diagnoses I am now treated for the Chronic and disabling pain which makes life more bearable.
So like I am saying if one of these hospitals are in reasonable distance from you give them a call.
Me n ma gf had sex just b4 her dates for period i.e on 30th April n her dates were on 2nd may.... Bt while hvin protected sex the condom got torn inside bt v came to know immediately... N v stopped... She took Ipill with 3 hrs... It has been 6days bt her periods dint came yet... She is taking as much as possible heat to pre-pond her periods... Bt still it dint came yet... We both r really worried... Plz help....
First: When writing to a site like this one do not write as if your texting. Write as if you are writing a business letter. I'm sure you learned how in English class. Using texting abbreviations will cause many of us not to respond to you question. Proper spelling and grammar count as well.
Now for your question: The Ipill could cause your girlfriends period to be late or be missed all together> Since it has been only eight days since you two had sex it is too soon for a home pregnancy test. I suggest waiting at least three more days and taking a home test. If it is negative you should be in the clear. I would wait another seven days and test again. IF this too is negative then your girlfriend is most likely not pregnant and if she has not gotten her period it should come sometime between now and when it is due again.
How do you babysit a 1 year old girl? She is my sister, and she loves me ( :) ) but I have a problem with making her listen to me. How can I make her listen to 'no'?
Should you find the answer to this question write a book on it. You will not only be rich but have the undying gratitude of every parent of toddlers. There is no answer to your question other than persistence and total attention to the toddler to make sure she does not get into anything that can hurt her.
It is not that she does not understand NO, it is the fact that everything is new and wonderful to her. All toddlers need to explore and learn about their world. In doing so they will push the boundaries to see just how far they can go. They will continue to do so until you reel them in and give them a time out and then they will most like have a crying and screaming fit because you have punished them and stopped them from exploring.
Once the time out is over most toddlers will go right back to what they were doing before the time out to see if they can go further then the last time. Do not underestimate them, they not only understand but they are sponges soaking up information and learning new things every waking moment of the day.
Your job as a baby sitter is to set the boundaries you want for when you are responsible for them and then enforce those boundaries through repetitive enforcement if need be. It will take time but eventually the toddler will get the message.
shonakhargosh@yahoo.com my id
i get raped when i was 16 and bleed.... it was an attact to me. so i noised and he didnt get chance to insert again. now i am 19 and getting married . will i bleed at first night... and no one knows about it except my mother . we are scare now because if a girl will not bleed at first night then the husband give divorce .. i never had any bf. i am a loyal and true girl plz help me
I am truly sorry you were raped. The fact is that when you were raped you lost your Hymen and along with it your virginity. Unless your husband in someway tears you when you have your fist sex with him or you are having your period you will not bleed again because of the loss of your Hymen. It does not grow back.
Many women who go to their marital beds do not bleed as they no longer have a Hymen lost through other activities than sex. Horse back riding, bike riding and playing some sports or even some dance activities can dislodge a women's hymen without their knowledge. The use of tampons can destroy a hymen as well.
THe best thing though is honesty and to tell your future husband what happened to you. If he truly loves you the fact that you were raped and not a virgin any more should make no difference to him. I know it would make no difference to me and cause me to love her all the more and want to help her put that terrible ordeal in her past and to move on to a wonderful life together.
i hate animal abuse it makes me too sad to think of anything what can i do if i hear or see it
Do as solidadvice4teens advises it is the best and only way to handle this type of situation. Never, ever try to insert yourself to correct this if you see it as you could be physically harmed.
If you have a cell phone call the police and give the location of where this happening. If you can tape what is being done to the animal to show the officers when they arrive. But do not get directly involved yourself.
Hi i hard sex with my mom elder brother daughter and since then i haven't been with my normal sense.. please will God ever forgive me for this cos its never going to happen again and i did this out of drunk... please am wating for an answer... thank you all
In my view you made an alcoholic fueled mistake. Mistakes are not sinful. Sins are something you fully intentionally do that are against god's or mans law. From what you write this was not and intentional act on your part.
You had sex with a first cousin not your sister. Still in most developed nations this is considered unlawful. I'm not sure it is also considered all that sinful. If it is it was not your intent in that you planned to do so and also by law anything done while drunk in regard to sex is done without consent as you cannot legally consent when drunk.
Short answer. Yes you did something we all have been told from the time we figure out our penis is for more than urinating that you did something wrong. I do not believe you committed a sin and you are beating yourself up for no reason. Yes, you feel bad because of how we are all taught. Speak to your cousin and clear the air. Make sure she knows this was a one time thing you did while drunk and will never happen again. Short of you actually raping her she had a hand in this as well if she consented or was drunk too.
One other thing let this be a lesson in the demons of drinking. Consider scaling back or not drinking at all in the future.
I'm 18/f and have been with my fiance for 3 years now. I'll call him jake well jake has changed a lot he's turned selfish, crude, possesive, and rude. I can't even be out much with friends even if they were girls and he goes around saying he owns me.. I have been faithful untill recent with my friend "mike" and he's much nicer and everyone tells me i should be with him. But the problem is that I live with my fiance and would be homeless if we broke up. My family is in awhole different state. I've searched the internet but no hope and I don't know what to do someone please help
I believe you realize, his cheating aside, that you are in an abusive relationship. You need to get out of this relationship before he hurts you physically. Your quite young and if it means your safety is best served by moving back to your parents home then I suggest you do so.
I realize doing so means moving to another state and leaving behind all the friends you have made including Mike. Your safety though must come first. Going home for this reason should not be viewed as a failure. You haven't failed. He failed you. You are not the one who showed a false front and turned into a possessive and abusive person.
You are also young enough that by moving back home you can take a different direction in life. Possibly going to college,getting a better education and building from there.
I would suggest that you should view this as an opportunity and not a failure. This is an opportunity to shift gears and direction in life. While I don't know you I have gotten a fair insight into who you are from your writing. I think you have much more to offer this world. This is an opportunity for you to step back and rethink what direction you wish to take with your life.
My advice is you move out and move back home to the safety and security of your family home.