I've been dating this girl for quite some time now and we've just recently slept together for the first time. I'm 24 and she's 18. She wasn't a virgin so it's nothing like that but after the sex, it felt extremely wrong. I never wanted to ask her out in the first place because I was 6 years older than her but my friends kept saying that "It's not a big deal; You're both adults, 6 years isn't much, blah, blah, blah etc." So I eventually asked her out and I'm glad I did because she's an amazing girl. Her being only 18 did bug me before but not as much as it does now. The sex was great and everything and it wasn't until after we finished that I started to feel like absolute shit. If it helps any, it happened on Saturday night and now, I've been trying to avoid her. I still have strong feelings for her and I don't want to end things with us, but I just don't know how to get past this. I'm not quite sure why I feel this way either. I want to talk to her but what am I supposed to say, "Hey Hun, I felt like I raped you the other night...How did you feel about it? Did you feel as if you were being raped?" I don't think I can sleep with her again until I get past this and I'm not sure talking to her about it will help.
hey-thats definitely a difficult situation. Sex definitely changes a lot of things about a relationship no matter how close you are and i can understand it must be extremely difficult for you right now. In terms of my thinking, age is just a number but you're right 6 years is a huge age difference, if i was you, i think i might have some issues with it also, if i was the girl i know that i wouldn't have a problem with it but i'd want to know why you were avoiding me. If you love her like you say you do, you owe her an explanation because she's obviously part of the issue. Despite the fact that you sound reluctant to talk to her about it i think thats your only way outta this. It's easier to feel comfortable with and relate to people when you are on the same page and when you are emotionally in the same place. She obviously must be mature for her age if you are 24 and dating her. By talking to her i think you can establish 2 things, first whats bothering you, just flat out say "i thoroughly enjoyed our experience together you were great everything was great im just having some issues dealing with the age difference". Second you can tell her you want to work on this and try to figure out what's making it such a big deal. That way you've at least cleared the air and let her know that it's nothing she's done wrong. Ultimately from talking to her, if she is mature enough then you should be convinced that shes old enough to handle your relationship-if you are still uncomfortable then i'd say at least put the sex on hold until you can figure stuff out in your head. I know its a confusing situation but i hope some of this advice has helped. best of luck to you and your girlfriend! -sar
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this may sound very goody goody but.. i am so sick of everyone doing drugs and drinking.. not that im completely innocent i mean ive done it before but it seems like right now every single person is into that and half of them are doing it to forget about problems.. now i did learn about drugs and i did learn that weed can actually make depression worse and i also know that after youve done weed for a while your wanting to try a new drug so what do i do.. i hate it that my friends do drugs and drink and dont tell me to forget about them and get new friends because i love my friends.. and also.. everyone in my school does it.. whether you want to believe that or not is up to you.. but really.. the ones that dont are like .. messiahs or something.. please help
*stonecoldmystery*
i can totally empathize with you right now. it seems like everyone is into smoking pot because its the latest "fad" or something. i don't know if thats really the case or if its just me, but that's the vibe ive been getting. the thing is im not opposed to that stuff either and i will participate in it-when i feel like it. i guess i'm not quite sure what your question is but bottom line, you can't control what other people choose to do with their lives and if it bothers you then you need to think about it differently cuz i think u're gonna have a hard time changing the behavior and attitudes of the rest of your school. do what you think is right for your life and make decisions that you want to make, you can be sick of the fact that "everyone" is doing these things but theres really nothing you can do about it, so instead of wasting your own time worrying about them, keep yourself busy and do stuff that you want to do. Best of luck-hope i helped at least a little.
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I think I've finally decided to tell the guy that I like, how I feel about him. The only problem is, I'm not sure what to say. We're old friends and he's shy and I don't want it to be anymore akward than it has to be. I need some ideas on what to say and some encouragement.
hey first of all props to you for being brave enough to tell the guy you like how you feel about them. so many times people are too afraid of rejection or what the other person will think-you get major points for that!!! so as for suggestions as to what you could say i would just be as normal and natural as possible, you said you were old friends so maybe do something you 2 would normally do like go to a movie or hang out-then be as open and honest about it as possible, "i don't want to change anything between us but theres something i have to get off my chest" and then let ur feelings out. It might be a little hard at first but you'll feel really relieved that you did get it off your chest. Honestly I don't know how he's gonna respond so its a risk you gotta take. I'll be thinking of you though and i hope it works out for the best!!! xoxoxo
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Ok, There is this one guy that I know and I've known that he has liked me for a while. The day I was finally going to say yea I found out that he had a girlfriend now. And I didn't really care. I still talk to him and everything and I can tell that he still really likes me. He always says how awesome I am and everything, and I don't know what to do. Because he is like flirting with me but he has a girlfriend. What do you think I should do? Help soon plz
Honestly? Who doesn't enjoy a little flattery? I would take the compliments for what they are worth, thank him for being so kind and then remind him he has a girlfriend. If you like him then I would be honest with him and just flat out say it, if not then don't act on it. Until then just enjoy the fact that he obviously thinks the world of you!
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there is this one girl that likes the same guy as me and she keeps on stealing him. I know he likes me b/c he has admitted it, so why did he go out with her?? I really like this kid. Should I ask him out again when he breaks up with this girl, or should I find someone else?
honestly re-read everything you wrote in your question. done? ok good. There are millions upon millions upon millions of guys in this world think about the fact that you are fighting over 1. He's already gotten the advantage because he has 2 girls fighting over him. Don't let him be your priority if you are just going to be an option to him. You deserve someone who will make you a priority! One day you will wake up and realize that fighting over guys is a waste of your precious time. when i tell you to find someone else believe me its in your own best interest-you deserve better. best of luck and let me know how it turns out :)
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Ok this is a real question i really want to know why do most girls think all guys want is sex it drives me mental because i actually flipped out on someone who asked a question and said anyways dont all guys just want to get laid it drives me mental and i just want to know why they think this cause i know when i get a g/f i actually want a relationship.
Well i think the reason behind your madness deals with generalizations. Everyone makes generalizations-example "all guys want sex". And while this isn't true of every guy out there a lot of guys do want just sex. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that-there is also nothing wrong with a guy who wants to find a girlfriend and be in a comfortable relationship. point being: we are all different and not everyone fits into a specific category-if you are different than be different no one else has to approve of who you are or the decisions you choose to make. I bet when you find your gf she will be extremely thankful she has found a guy who's sole interest isn't sex! Best of luck-don't stress over this, life's too short to drive urself insane :)
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See, last night I put in my tampon at about 6:00. I wore it all night long and accidentally fell asleep with it in and wore it until 9:00 this morning. My stomach hurts a little but maybe that's because i got a little drunk last night? I dont know though, I'm scared because i've read so many things about Toxic Shock Syndrome. So what should i do? Thanks!! I rate!
TSS is extremely rare but leaving a tampon in for more than 8 hours is not a good thing either. I am almost positive that the stomach ache is from period symptoms and may or may not have something to do with the fact that you were drunk last nite. Drink lots of water, i hope you changed the tampon by now but keep an eye out for symptoms: [Toxic shock syndrome from Staphylococcus starts suddenly with vomiting, high fever (temperature at least 102 degrees Fahrenheit, or 38.8 degrees Celsius), a rapid drop in blood pressure (with lightheadedness or fainting), watery diarrhea, headache, sore throat, and muscle aches. Within 24 hours, a sunburn-like rash appears. There also may be bloodshot eyes and an unusual redness under the eyelids or inside the mouth (and vagina in females)] if you have none of these symptoms then i am sure you are fine-but try to be more responsible with tampons :) best of luck i hope your okay!!!
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I am jewish, people tell me all the time that in their religion there is a trinity of some sort. My question is how can Jesus, The Holy Ghost, and _________ make up G-d? I dont know the third one either.
I'm just a little confused.
~Nokomis~
hey lets see her i haven't been to sunday school in about 10 years but here's what i remember:
God is the ultimate the creator etc.
Jesus=his son, the man who died on the cross for our sins
The Holy Spirit=a piece of God that lives within all of us.
Therefore those 3 make up the christian religion.
Hope i helped some.
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NEED HELP NOW!!
Ok so the other night me and my boyfriend had a talk about about porn and I asked him all these questions... and he told me that he'd only looked at it/watched it three times on kazaa... so I made him swear on us and on my life and he did, but then today me and his friend were joking and he said my b/f just had porn on his computer so i was joking around and I said I was gonna check his computer and see and he got all defensive and wouldn't let me, but then when I did... I found like 10 different websites on his computer... They're all from a long time ago, but still he lied to me! Do I have a right to be mad at him? especially since he swore on us and my life!?!?
WHAT SHOULD I DO???
PS: he appologize a LOT and said he was sorry and he loved me "so much" but I feel like an idiot now for believing him... I need help please give me advice!!
why are you trying to restrict that your guy watches porn? There's nothing wrong with it and i really don't understand what the big deal is. You can have a boyfriend that loves and cherishes you yet who also likes to look at/watch porn. Maybe this is an issue of maturity because as you get older this stuff really doesn't matter. But honestly it's not as big a deal as your making it out to be-so he watches porn-could be worse he could be cheating on you. Teenage guys look at porn its a fact so you can try to restrict him and hold him down but i don't see what the point is...anyways stop stressing so much. good luck.
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i have been trying to do crunches for about 3 weeks and my stomach didnt really get any smaller. does any one know how many crunches to do in a day or does any one know what other techniques that will work to get a flatter stomach
if you want to get rid of flab around your stomach the easiest way to do that is run. you can do as many crunches as you want but if you have a layer of fat over ur stomach muscles ur not gonna see anything.
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i am sort of stuck in the middle. my mom lives in michigan and i live with my dad in california and now that its getting time to go to college i choose 2 really good schools from both states and applied to them and surprizing enough i got into all four ... no problem right wrong i have friends in both states each wanting me to go to the college in their state and i dont want to make anyone feel bad and say NO im not going but im still a little unsure about what i should say to them beccause i dont want to hurt their feelings ???
First of all college is the time to be selfish. It is a personal decision that you should make based on YOUR interests and YOUR plans. Granted friends have an impact on where you want to go you will make new friends wherever you end up and i'm sure your parents will support your decision either way. Really tho this isn't about "hurting their feelings" its about taking the first step in what you want to do with your life-stop trying to please other people and just do what you think is in YOUR best interest.
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Okay my last question was about my period coming every 2 weeks..A lot of you replyed I havent 'straightened out' becuase im to young..but i've had my period since i was in 6th grade..and im now im 10th. its been regular up until a few months ago...So whats wrong lol
hey sweetie i have the same problem as you. I ended up going to my gyn and she prescribed me birth control pills to regulate my period. it's caused by stress or changes in weight so talk to ur parent about making you an appointment with a gyn. she can prescribe you bc pills-they really really help too. best of luck xoxoxoxo
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Guys like to say girls are difficult but guys can be just as difficult too. There's this guy who no matter how hard I try to not like him, he stays in my mind constantly. I know most would say move on but the truth is I can't. He's not dating anyone at the moment but he loves to flirt a lot. We've been friends for awhile and it didn't seem like him, but he played me. He promised my bestfriends that he wouldn't hurt me and also he let them know that he liked me a lot but he never came around to asking me out. Should I still wait for something to happen even though it's been months, or just force myself to move on?
I don't know if what I'm going to tell you is what you want to hear but it's what you need to do. You don't deserve to be led on and strung on. Chances are if he hasn't asked you out yet he's not going to anytime soon. You need to move on and let someone find you who deserves you. I've experienced exactly what you're going through and the truth is you aren't gonna be able to move on if you don't want to move on with your whole heart-letting go takes a lot of strength, some people don't have that and they are just stuck on this one person until someone better comes along. Do you think you deserve better? If so you need to move on. Best of luck
xoxoxo
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I just found out my husband has been cheating on me. We agreed to separate for a while because we can't live together right now. But he is still sleeping with this woman who is also married with children. He says he is not sure weather or not it is going to work out with her, that he doesn't know her, he is just living a fantasy right now, replacing what was missing in our relationship. He is getting attention he hasn't gotten from me in a while because our lives have been so busy. It doesn't make it okay, but our relationship is way to special to throw away and I want to work it out with him. We are going to couples counseling in a few months. I am having a hard time convincing him to stop sleeping with this woman, and I am thinking about sending this woman's husband the e-mails she and my husband have exchanged along with a letter I have written to him revealing the truth about what his wife has been out doing. But will this push this woman further into my husbands arms or will it make her and her husband focus on their own relationship instead of her focusing on hers with my man? Please help, I don't know weather or not to send it without everyone's advice out there!! Will it only cause more problems that will work against what I want (my husband back in my arms) or will it end the affair my husband is having?
WOW!...you are a strong woman. For me cheating is a zero tolerance policy, i don't think i could be with a man who cheated on me just because its such a betrayl of trust. I think you are entitled to do as you please in terms of telling this other woman's husband. He has a right to know. I wouldn't necessarily send the emails unless he asks for them. Just make sure he knows about the affair. I'm sorry but you sound like you deserve someone who wont cheat on you and I really hope you are able to work this all out. Just make sure you know what you want-i know he's important to you and you love him but now its your turn to ask yourself what you want. do you want to stay with him? do you want to end things? really the ball is in your court. Best of luck...keep me updated. im sure a lot of other people will be interested to read how this turns out.
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do you think its better to fit in and go agianst yur own beliefs OR to be a little ""less popular"" and do what you want to do? i am stuck in between.
It's easy to want to conform to other people's beliefs because that way you fit in and you are just like everyone else. But just think about that. Do you really want to be like everyone else? It's hard to stand up for what you believe in, but its important because it helps you discover who you are. I would rather be liked for something i am then for something im not. It's your choice ultimately but in the end you gotta be happy with yourself at the end of the day! hope i helped
xoxoxo
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ok...for the last day of school, before break, i wore white pants...because they were white, i work a thong...im not a slut, so i dont let it hang out, and i usually wear a belt with my pants, but these were nice pants that i didnt need a belt for...well during lunch, i was walking up to my friend and my guy friend wanted to hug me from behind, but ended up steping on my pants adn everyone saw i was wearing a thong. he didnt pants me, but some people saw the string...i know its not bad to wear thongs, but that was a pretty embarassing situation, and i didnt want everyone knowing. tommorow i go back to school, and i dont want everyone laughing at me...what do i do?
there is nothing wrong with wearing a thong-in fact they are ALL i wear. An occasional "slip up" is bound to occur when you wear them-nothing to worry about. You can't stress about what other people are going to say or think of you based on a 1 day slip up. If you constantly wear your jeans around ur hips and your thong straps are hanging on your waist then you've got a problem lol but this definitely doesn't seem like the case. it's honestly not that bad and thongs are sexy so DON'T STRESS!!!
xoxoxo
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i am having such problems with my mom lately. we usually get along really well, but lately it feels like she doesn't listen to anything i say. i know this sounds really really cliche, but she doesn't understand me like she used to. i worry a lot, and i know she can't understand that feeling, but i wish she would try. instead she just talks to me like a 3 year old, which just gets me more worked up. she doesn't know how to make me feel better anymore- shes my mom, she knows everything about my personality- you'd think she know what gets me so upset. i really don't know what to do.
hey hun! i remember through out my early teens i wanna say 12-16 i got into intense fights with my mom. One day i woke up and nothing she said was right. She didn't understand me and nothing that came out of her mouth made sense to me. You are growing up and your mom isn't perfect. We are constantly changing and your mom probably isn't used to the "new" you. She is only human so you gotta give her time to adjust. What really worked for me is trying to prove to my mom that i was adult enough to have a meaningful conversation with her. Explain to her why you are feeling upset and ask her what her opinions are. She'll start to see that you are maturing and need to be treated like an adult. Honestly though she can't treat you like an adult unless you act like one. Good luck with your situation and just give it time. I swear it gets better. xoxoxoxo
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Okay, I know I shouldn't have but I did!! Everyone told me not to do it but I did it anyway. I popped about 4 pimples because they were huge and just staring at them made me feel grossed out. When I popped them it swelled up and had puss coming out of them. Is there anything you can use to make the swelling stop and to shrink or not to show real badly. Please don't tell me to use coverup, makeup and all those acne scrubs. Tell me an ingrediant something you can put on the pimple that you can make out of everday items. thanxz, please hurry!!
hey sweetie! i find that benzoyl peroxide works great for spot treatment-i know clearasil makes a product that is 10% b.p. but you have to be careful to only use it on the spots cuz it seriously dries ur face. put them on the zits over nite and they will appear noticeably smaller tomorrow! good luck-i hope i helped
xoxoxoxo
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my bedroom tends to gets really messy.There is not enough closet space for all my clothes & not enough storage space for all my belongings. my room isn't that big and i need some ideas on how i could organize my stuff. any ideas are really appreciated. thanks so much!!
~~~Chelsey~~~
hey sweetie! u should take a trip to one of my favorite stores: CONTAINER STORE. Hopefully they have one around where you live because i think its a nationwide chain. Anyways if not you can probably find a store that sells organizational stuff. You can go crazy at the store and buy cute shelves, organizers, bins, and tubs to put your stuff into. Some of these are small enough to fit under your desk and some will fit in your closet. The nice thing about the bins is that you can stack them so they will take up less space. Anyways i hope this helps a little and good luck !!!
xoxoxo
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On New Years Eve im going to my boyfriends house. I'm a virgin but that night i think i want to lose my virginity with him. I'm 14 almost 15 i know i'm young but i'm tired of being a virgin. We've only been going out for a week today but we went out for 7 months a while back. Please don't reply if your just going to call me a hoe or yell at me because i don't need that. Would i be making the wrong choice if i do? I already know about the whole getting pregnant thing im not stupid..but other than that am i making the right choice? thanks..
hey-im gonna be point blank honest with you. The question is are you ready to have sex with him? I wouldn't let a bunch of strangers determine the outcome of my life. You need to sit down and think this over for yourself-know the risks, know what you are getting into. If you feel its something you really want to do, then by all means go for it (BUT USE PROTECTION)-if you don't think u're ready there are plenty of other opportunities to have sex. Just make sure its something you won't regret-if you have any second thoughts then just don't do it. Hope i helped
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