|
I've been dating this girl for quite some time now and we've just recently slept together for the first time. I'm 24 and she's 18. She wasn't a virgin so it's nothing like that but after the sex, it felt extremely wrong. I never wanted to ask her out in the first place because I was 6 years older than her but my friends kept saying that "It's not a big deal; You're both adults, 6 years isn't much, blah, blah, blah etc." So I eventually asked her out and I'm glad I did because she's an amazing girl. Her being only 18 did bug me before but not as much as it does now. The sex was great and everything and it wasn't until after we finished that I started to feel like absolute shit. If it helps any, it happened on Saturday night and now, I've been trying to avoid her. I still have strong feelings for her and I don't want to end things with us, but I just don't know how to get past this. I'm not quite sure why I feel this way either. I want to talk to her but what am I supposed to say, "Hey Hun, I felt like I raped you the other night...How did you feel about it? Did you feel as if you were being raped?" I don't think I can sleep with her again until I get past this and I'm not sure talking to her about it will help.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
hey-thats definitely a difficult situation. Sex definitely changes a lot of things about a relationship no matter how close you are and i can understand it must be extremely difficult for you right now. In terms of my thinking, age is just a number but you're right 6 years is a huge age difference, if i was you, i think i might have some issues with it also, if i was the girl i know that i wouldn't have a problem with it but i'd want to know why you were avoiding me. If you love her like you say you do, you owe her an explanation because she's obviously part of the issue. Despite the fact that you sound reluctant to talk to her about it i think thats your only way outta this. It's easier to feel comfortable with and relate to people when you are on the same page and when you are emotionally in the same place. She obviously must be mature for her age if you are 24 and dating her. By talking to her i think you can establish 2 things, first whats bothering you, just flat out say "i thoroughly enjoyed our experience together you were great everything was great im just having some issues dealing with the age difference". Second you can tell her you want to work on this and try to figure out what's making it such a big deal. That way you've at least cleared the air and let her know that it's nothing she's done wrong. Ultimately from talking to her, if she is mature enough then you should be convinced that shes old enough to handle your relationship-if you are still uncomfortable then i'd say at least put the sex on hold until you can figure stuff out in your head. I know its a confusing situation but i hope some of this advice has helped. best of luck to you and your girlfriend! -sar
]
Well being 6 years appart isnt that bad. I have an older friend and she is married to a guy that has kids her age! But i mean thats like 10-15 years appart so i think 6 is fine. And don't worry about it so much. I think going out with a girl 7 years or younger is the perfect time appart. So just ignore that feeling and feel what you actually feel with her.
h.i.h.
nat*
P.s. Im only 14 so its not like i KNOW everything... but i do try to help
]
You didn't rape her if she agreed to it and she is of legal age just like you. My neighbors are 6 years apart and had a baby a couple of years ago. 6 years doesn't matter much once you are like 18.
*yea i guess i didn't hmm sorry.*
i guess you would just have to figure out why you felt the way you did.
]
LOOK: AL I WAS TRYIN 2 DO WAS HELP. YOU DONT HAVE 2 B RUDE
]
More Questions: |