about

**** I've been gone quite a long time. However I'm still breathing though it's touch and go. Don't expect me to answer or check in much. ****

Welcome to the junkdrawer that is my brain! I know something about many things, and I if I don't know it, I admit that I don't know. That I am constantly finding things I know nothing about and correcting that ignorance keeps me busy and happy. More junk for the drawer.

I love and have experience with many types of animals, including the human. I don't offend easy and I am generally cynical and a smart-butt. I love to drive, read, work on the computer and I spend WAY too much time watching Anime and bidding on ebay.

advice

how 2 my cat from useing my house plants as liter box?

gravel, the large chunky kind. Put it on top of the dirt and the cats will have a hard time digging. If that doesn't help nothing that I know of will.

[view]


Well, I was born in Europe and then I moved here in America. My family and I had to start all over again. My parents had to find new jobs, buy a new home, cars and everything. Now, we're living life like normal people and we have more then most people.

Neather of my parents went to collage because thier families couldn't afford it back thenI love my mom to death but I feel like she's working soo hard just to make us happy. My dad had a great job and he's very happy with it but I feel so sorry for my mom. She cleans for a living.. I know it's sad but I feel so bad. Sometimes I just wish I was more supportive and that I didn't argue with her so much because she works SO hard for us & at times I can be ungrateful for the things I have but I always want more.

Since she didn't go to collage, is there any way she can get a new and better job. She always talks to me about how she just wants me & my brother to do good in school and someday that we will be very succesful. I don't want her to wake up everyday for the next 20 years going to work and clean! I want my mom to be happy just like we are and not have to do what she hates for the rest of her life.

I try to be a great kid and not argue and help out but I'm just a regular 14 year old teenager and it's normal to fight with parents but after that I feel soo bad and sorry for her.

Any advice on this? I get tears in my eyes just thinking about her. I want her to be happy and do something that she loves. I want her to get a better job but that seems to be hard for her.

Here is the story of my mother. Let your mom read this and maybe it will inspire her as it has me. My mom dropped out of highschool and married at 15 to my father. After long years of scraping to make ends meet, she decided that she didn't want her children to live like that anymore and the only way to change her life was to get an education. Once I was in elementary school, she started classes to get her GED. She started Jr. College and worked three jobs to pay her way through. It took a lot of time effort and the whole family's support, but today my mother is an Elementary School art teacher with a Masters Degree in Art Education and a BS in Business Management. Both of her children have graduated from college and she and my father are still together after 40 years of marriage. It's NOT easy or fast, but it can happen. Good luck!

[view]


What do I do when my mom tells me that I'm the cause of all of her problems?

You ignore it. A statement like that is a hysterical denial of reality. NO One is the cause of someone's every problem. Your mother is going through a really tough time and is not dealing with it very well. I can't say she'll improve, I don't know what her problem is, but I can tell you that she's not telling you the truth. I hope she gets her ass off her shoulders and realizes how foolish she's being. Comments like that even if they aren't meant and are said in anger have been known to split families. I wish you luck.

[view]


Hey i am 17 and i have this boyfriend whom i care alot about. he is 19 and last thursday we went through a little problem. his friends tell him he needs to date older women because they are more experience and that they dont make no bull crap. anyways he told me that they make sense but he really cares for me to much and he dont want that to happen. he is going to cancun in 2 weeks and i asked him if we were going to break up when he goes. and he asked me why i asked that. but then thursday he said all thatand he is the kind of person who does not take bull crap and he tells it like it is. but i really care for him alot and dont want us to break up for no reason. well then last night we were on the phone and we were talking about why i asked if ihe wanted to be with me. because saturday i was feeling like he did not want to be with me, and i asked him and then we finally talked. i know i may confuse you but i am confusing myself but what i want to know is how can i get him to talk really serious to me?
Thanks

Your aren't confusing me and neither is he. His no bullshit = I want sex without strings. With you he has to put effort into a relationship and talk about things that are important to you. He wants to break up so he can hump what he wants on the trip without guilt. You actually care about him and that is difficult for him to deal with when his friends seem to think sex it the be all end all of life right now. He's got to make a choice, sex or relationship. He could truely screw up his life right now. Luck!

[view]


i drink diet coke all the time. my friends say it will give me cancer. is that true? becuase i dont want the calories and carbs and sugar from soda or juice but i dont love water either.
sooo is diet coke cancerous?
what are some healthy alternatines? (i dont like milk)


thanks!

When Neutrasweet was put in Diet Coke the rate of Multiple Sclerosis nearly doubled in the female population. None of the sweeteners on the market are truely safe or properly tested includeing the old stand by Sacrine. Sacrine testing in links to cancers have never been proven to conclusion because the lab test results have not been consistant. That said, yes carbonated drinks in general a terrible for your health. Water is truely the best thing for anyone to drink. Healthy alturnatives to diet and carbonated drinks? Unsweetened green tea, organic soy milk without carageenan a known carcinogen, and no sugar added fruit juices in small amounts. You truely can develop a taste for water and it would be in your best interest to try. Good luck!

[view]


I am a dark, pessimistic, negative person. I feel totaly hopeless and that both the good and evil forces are against me. I try to be the positive, outgoing type, but that realy isnt me. Im realy pained inside with doubt and hiddin secrets. I have a crush on someone and today I was thinking about the girl, the way she acts when I flirt with her, the way she is so outgiong. Those happy, warming feelings turned cold. I have been doubtful about myself, I feel like I cant start a close relationship, not even a close friendship. Its more than that, but it would take forever to explain things. I feel weak and helpless. Can you help me?
--Caden--

You sound soo like me in high school. I didn't start feeling human until I was put on prozac. Seems that an inherited chemical imbalance was a big part of my problem. Not all of it of course, you can only blame so much on genetics. Seretonin is the chemical in my head that gets used up or recyled before it gets where it needs to go. Some things you can do in your diet that can help. Eat more turkey and pasta, donlt drink anythig with nutrasweet. These little things will help some, but if you can get a doctor to help. Luck to you!

[view]


Ok.

So, tonight I was going out to eat with some friends. While getting in the car, one of them managed to slam the door on my right thumb. Hard. Impacted on the nail and sides of my thumb.

Now, I have a purple finger about 1.5 times its normal size, blood somewhat congealing under the nail, and at the cuticle on top of my thumb it hasnt stopped bleeding (it bleeds VERY slowly, about a drop every 20 min) in the last 6 hours. Its also quite stiff. Sorry for the vivid description.

Im not much for first aid, so any ideas on how I can get the swelling down and the thumb back to normal by sunday? Im going visit my girl, and I forsee this damn thumb betting in the way. (Dont ask)

Ive done ice and bandage wrapping, but anyone have any other ideas?

Now, on sunday at about 5 am Im going to be arriving in town, so it has to be quick and effective remedies. 5s to anyone who gives an idea that improves the situation.

Extremly hot, extremly salty water. You should really go to a doctor for this. You'll lose the nail, but ti is the blood clot that scares me about all this. You need professional care. This said, the salt soak will bring down your swelling and help heal or prevent infection.

[view]


Hi
Has nayone ever gotten a Pap Smear(sp)? becuase i am going to get one soon and im very scared, like does it hurt?

The only time it has every hurt me is if I'm having a problem. (Like already being irritated, not anything serious.) The worst it's ever been is a little stinging like a shot, but the discomfort doesn't last past getting off the table. It's more embarrassing than anything else and nothing to fret over. You'll be fine.

[view]


Well I'm writing a research paper for my Honors English 2 class and it's too late to change topics. Mine is Italian culture. Well I know religion and entertainment are apart of culture, but what other topics should I discuss? It has to be 5 pages, 12pt font, double spaced. Mine, handwritten, medium-big handwriting, single spaced, is about a page and a half with my intro, 2 paragraphs on entertainment, and 1 paragraph on religion. I'm not really sure what would be included in culture. I don't think I just write about everything in Italy-- or do I? Pretty much, if you were doing a countries culture, what would be paragraph topics? I hope you get what I mean, sorry if you don't. Thanks in advance!!

Before you get upset, I have a degree in English, so I do know what I'm talking about. First, some basic paper writing advise. As broad as your topic is, I doubt you'll get much better than a C regardless of length if you write about everything. Part of a good research paper is knowing how to narrow a topic. If your teacher approved the topic, no wonder you're having so much trouble. The teacher sucks. If not, then you should have the choice of narrowing your topic to ONE facet of Italian culture. For example: Did you know that Italy has one of the highest wine consumptions per capta of any other nation? If that isn't culture I don't know what is. Plus there are many regions of Italy that have their own cultural context. Tuscany for example. Then there is the history of thier art which has spread to the world. I think your best bet for a good paper would be to outline a specific element of the country's culture and research HOW this element effects the people of the country. For example: The culture of a largely Catholic country could be interesting to delve into. HOW does religion effect the politics, daily life or history of the Italian people? The answers to that are facinating, shocking, horrific, and inspirational. (It is a topic I know something about, but it is also one that can offend people. Think about that before you choose.) You might even find yourself needing to narrow your topic again. Luck to you!

[view]


I need to find newspaper articles from 8 weeks ago. But since I recycled all of them, where would I go to get them? I believe libraries have them, but I need to cut out and use the actual article. Help?

You can't just make a copy? Hum, try contacting the paper itself. I know that old papers are returned each day, plus they may have something called a morg of old copies. Good luck!

[view]


Okay. I'm a junior in high school and I'm graduating at the end of this year. I want to enter college in the Fall of 2006 and major in math and physics, those have always been areas that interest me. I have already applied to four different colleges, I'm working on scholarships as hard as I can, and I have two part-time jobs in addition to keeping up extracurriculars and 4 AP classes. I'm working as hard as I can this year because I really want to set myself up for college and living on my own.
Here's the problem: My mom has forbidden me to apply to any colleges, she wants me to go in the Fall of 2007 so that I can get in a full year of work, because she says I'm not mature enough. I have worked really, really hard at everything: I've kept up my chores, my job teaching piano, my job at the library, my schoolwork, and being in a musical, and she still won't let me. Now, normally I would think that working for a year to save up money for college is a great idea. But my majors are in math and physics, and a year is a long time to be away from calculus and quantum mechanics. I'm really afraid of losing the momentum, and of missing my chance to go for my goals.
My guidance counselor at school tells me to apply to every college I want to and not worry about my mom just yet...along with a score of other people, like my dad, my grandma, my boyfriend, and various other family friends. It's just, I'm really worried about this...like the fight that will ensue once I start hearing back from the colleges I applied to. I'm completely dedicated to going in the Fall of 2006...with or without my mom's consent, but I would really like it to be with.
Is there anything I can do to convince her I can handle it?
Sorry it's so long -
Nevaeh

This has nothing to do with YOU not being ready. This is about your mother not being ready to let you go. She will never be ready. In 2007 it will be something else to come up that will prevent you from being prepared to go in her eyes. You are in a no win situation because no matter how hard you try nothing will be good enough. BECAUSE it's not you that needs to mature and prepare to move on with your life. I'd guess you are an only or youngest child. Some women just can't bare to think of having an empty nest (all their children gone on and not needing her any more.) Your mother will get over it. This is a growing process for her as well as for you. Do what you need to do to reach the goals you've set for yourself, and tell your mother that you love her and will always need her in your life regardless of how close or how far away or how old you are. Prepare for a rough time, but I'm sure you'll all weather it fine. Full steam ahead!!

[view]


I would like to know information on herpes in/on Bengal cats. Cures or if it can be spread or passed on.

Thank you
Cheryl

I have had no personal experience with this problem in my cats, but I did look up at least one web site that may help you. If this site doesn't tell you everything you need, look up "feline herpes" in your search engine. I'm sorry I haven't had time to check out the info myself, but I will as a loving and responsible owner of three felines. Luck to you an health to your pets!

www.animalhealthchannel.com/rhinotracheitis/

[view]


okay this is a big problem. My cousin Kim who is really important to me got married for the second time to this guy john. Well, before this my cousin and I were really close even though I live in Ny and she lives in Pa. we always wrote to each other and called each other and all that. I guess I should tell you that she has four kids, her two oldest are from her fist marriage and then the third child christopher is from this guy that she was dating before she married john and then she just had nicholas with john not too long ago. Anyway, I just found out that he has been beating on christopher and he has bruises all over him and he tells him to go to bed cause the boogey man is going to come get him and he is only 3. well my cousin's mom noticed the bruises and her husband went and talked to john about it and after that the kids stopped going over there to be babysat. Then I found out that john kicked my cousin down the stairs when she was pregnant with nicholas and he has hit her and thrown stuff at her. also they got in a car accident, my cousin, john, christopher and nicholas. and for some reason I think it was planned, cause john was driving. I don't know what to do. I am so worried about her and I have tried emailing her and writing her a letter and I haven't heard anything back yet. I can't call her cause I don't have her phone number and pretty much noone in my family does. I can't get a hold of her sister. I am so worried about her and all I think about is the next phone call I get will be saying she's dead or seriously injured because of him. HELP please.

Report the child abuse to the your cousin's local HDR department. You should be able to look it up on the web. I think you are right to worry, but in most states unless the abused spouse reports the abuse, the police will not do anything about that. Children are another matter entirely. HDR has to look into reports, but they aren't often very good. Keep after them, write to people around your cousin and encourage them to get involed in the children's lives. I hate to say there is not much you can do. If you can get a background chack on the guy it may help, but I'm not sure how you can go about gettingone. Good luck.

[view]


I was just wondering if i'm like mentally okay. I'm like super sound sensitive as in i can hear alot of noises and all but i'll focus in on one and it'll start to really annoy me. Then i'll start getting mad all of a sudden and it'll bother me even more. The same is when people move alot or scratch or anything it bothers me so much i get like steaming mad. I also have really bad mood swings. My family gives me a hard time about them but i can't control them. I just get mad and all. Is there something wrong??? No stupid answers plz. I'll rate high for good ones. Thanks.

I have the same problem. In my case it turned out to be anxiety attacks. The doctor put me on Prozac and I stopped wanting to rip people apart. Alot of people think that Panic attacks/ anxiety attacks mean you get really scared and want to run. This is not true. What happens is your body prepares for the fight or flight response you hear about in science class. People like us go fight, get aggressive and prepare to protect ourselves by attacking. What makes this such a problem is that we aren't in a situation that requires us to fight. We over-react. The good thing is that you recognize that you are over-reacting. Tell your doctor. You will not believe the improvement in your life.

[view]


Today my boyfriend told me some stuff would be much more enjoyable if my lower region was shaved, but the problem is, it IS shaved. My question is- how 'shaved' can you get? Can you get to where there aren't even the little hairs? I've tried that before, but all it did was leave me with razorburn.

Read "shaved" in his mind as "waxed." Shaving will not get the super smooth porn feel you are after. By the way it works for you too. Have him shave his legs. Enjoy!

[view]


I feel so stressed out, but I don't know why. School isn't any harded than usual, and my family/friends/ love life is fine. I don't physically feel different than any other day, yet for some reason i constantly feel like crying about....everything. i dont know know why, but im so over emotional. nothing has happened to make things different, but im so stressed i feel like i cant take anything anymore. And advice? I rate 5's.

Here is the major thing to remember about stress, it adds up. This means you don't HAVE to Have any major stressors in your life to get overwhelmed. This is called build up. It means that everyday stressors have used up your energy and you feel down and stressed and emotional. Yes hormonal changes can also contribute, but that doesn't have to be a factor. Look on the net for some kind of relaxation excersises and try to find a few minutes to yourself each day to just take a deep breath. This should help. If the stress continues and the execises do not help, find a councilor to talk to. Sometimes just venting evryday annoyances can help tremendously. Luck!

[view]


my so called friend knew i liked this boy, she was even talking about me liking him to somebody else. and my friend found out that i liked him, and she's being stirring rumours that arent true and she found out that the boy i like has alot of common things with me and she is trying to be his perfect image which is me i recently found out that they are going out what should i do
i dont understand why she didnt want to tell me to see how i feel about it
and now the person that i found out that she thinks there is something going on between me and him
she was saying to me the other day she's moving to california after her degree
help please i am hurt and confused

Sweetheart, I learned long ago that very few people you think are your friends are worthy of that title. All you can do in this situation is admit to yourself that this person cares more about themselves than your friendship and let her go. Go on with your life without her and hope she really does go to California and leaves you alone. The guy will eventually see through her, so don't worry too much about that realtionship. Just insert yourself in a friendly nonstalker way in his life and flirt a little. It may work out or it may not. Good luck!

[view]


Last night I had just witnessed a death. it made me real sad. It was my grannie. she has played a HUGE role in my life. I stood there and watched her die. I All I do is cry now. What can i do to stop

I witnessed the death of my grandfather. He was a very special man and I will always miss him. It is good that you can cry. Crying though it hurts is the best way to relieve the pain her passing hs caused you. Let yourself cry. Though the pain of her passing will never completely go away, that you can grieve and cry now will help you heal to a place where remembering her will be a pleasure as well as a pain. This is a normal part of the grieving process. It isn't easy, but it will eventually pass. Give your selftime. Big hug. It will get better.

[view]


Male/17
Hey, I’m usually the one giving advice. I don’t need advice. I just have a question and I want to know your opinion. This question is for deep thinkers. Long answers are encouraged as well as comical ones.

I’ve seen quite a lot of “love” questions, asked by adolescences. What would you call "true love"? Many people have been saying “I have a boyfriend and I REALY love him” and “she said that he loves me” or things like that. I’ve seen these questions being asked by 13 year olds! Teens DO have deep affections for people, but I really don’t think that they are capable of TRUE love. How can there be love if teen relationships only last 2 months or even 2 years! 2 years is quite long for a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, but shouldn’t love last a LIFETIME? I agree that teens think that they are in love (I’ve been there) but I wouldn’t call that love. I would call it more like, “deep affection”. After all, if love between teens is really “love” then they shouldn’t break up, right? I think that teens are too young and “unexposed” to have TRUE LOVE. Even adults. They mistakenly call their relationships “love”. If it was actually love, then shouldn’t there be less or no divorces?

I think the main problem with the term Love, is that people expect it to be easy. There is NOTHING easy about a relationship. Another thing I think effects the young ones who think they are in love is that they are going through a hormonal change that floods their bodies with new and powerful feelings. These new sexual feelings combined with actually liking someone can be easily mistaken for love. It's all new and wonderful and romantic. Life doesn't run that way though. I believe that sexual and emotional love should go hand in hand and that it should last a lifetime. I believe that true love is accepting a person for all of their faults and fears and mistakes as well as all of the good things about them. You can't truely love someone you want to change, because you have not accepted them unconditionally. This is one of the things that make a relationship so hard. Small things can drive you crazy, and you need to keep communication open between you and trust your love to do the best thing even if it's not what you agree with. You need to be able to stand up for yourself and to back down in equal measure. This takes TONS of work and requires both people to work at it. Modern couples don't seem to stay together because divorce is so much more socially acceptable than it used to be. Before people were socially rejected for divorce, now it's just a normal fact of life. Couples didn't stay together though love but through social pressure. Regardless of emotions envolved marriage takes work. I know from experience that love can be distroyed if both people don't work to nurture it. I am divorced. I blame the lack of mutual willingness to put as much effort into the marriage as working at your job.

[view]


I just got a new computer..And I don't have very many songs. And I don't really know what I want to download. Any suggestions??

I like Rap, Hip hop, Techno, Pop, Rock, and Old Rap from like the 90's n stuff..and 80's music..90's..country..some 70's so yea pretty much anything. Lol you'd help me out alot!! I'll rate 5's if you name more then 1 song!

Thanks

musicmatch.com has a radio option that you can listen to an hour of music each day for free. You can choose all kinds of music and artists. They give you the name and you can download per single or buy the entire albumn.

[view]



<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
humorist-workshop

eXTReMe Tracker