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Porn
NEED HELP NOW!!
Ok so the other night me and my boyfriend had a talk about about porn and I asked him all these questions... and he told me that he'd only looked at it/watched it three times on kazaa... so I made him swear on us and on my life and he did, but then today me and his friend were joking and he said my b/f just had porn on his computer so i was joking around and I said I was gonna check his computer and see and he got all defensive and wouldn't let me, but then when I did... I found like 10 different websites on his computer... They're all from a long time ago, but still he lied to me! Do I have a right to be mad at him? especially since he swore on us and my life!?!?
WHAT SHOULD I DO???
PS: he appologize a LOT and said he was sorry and he loved me "so much" but I feel like an idiot now for believing him... I need help please give me advice!!
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I can undterstand why you would be a little bit upset... but look its a guy! all of them do it, its nothing new hes just a guy and for some reason they like to look at that stuff... trust me its not like hes ever gonna get to go out with anyone of them! so i would sweat it...he doesnt know any better
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Calm yourself. If you were him, would you really admit to your girlfriend that you had been watching porn? He was probably ashamed and embarassed about it, it's normal. Okay, so he swore on your relationship and all but I think you're taking it too seriously. Just because he swore it's not like the whole relationship has ended because he was lying. Forgive and forget, the websites were from a long time ago anyway.
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having your boyfriend look at porn is not bad at all, and to make him swear on your both relationships??? thats wrong hunie, you have NO right to be mad at him, your just going a little too far with the whole concept on porn hun, you obviously looked at porn sometime in your life, probably with your girl friends, who cares, porn is porn, and EVERYONE will look at it no matter what. he apoligized, forgive him, its ridiculous
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y the hell are you makin people swear on your relationship and your life. im sorry but if that aint the gayest shit ive ever heard i dont know what is. so what he looked at porn before there ever was the two of you so y does it matter. as long as it didnt get all serious you should let him be. he prolly lied to you cuz he knew you would flip out. since it was before you then dont bother wit it. he obviously aint lookin at it no more.
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Sometimes guys don't want to say anything that makes them look bad. Your boyfriend was probably ashamed that you would look at him differently if you knew that he had watched those sites. Fear is somtimes overwhelming in a realtionship. I think we are afraid to talk about our pasts because we are afraid of what that person may think of us. If you really love and care for him, communicate to him to be honset with you and that you will not judge him on his past mistakes. Let him know that he can trust you and that you can trust him. Open the doors to yourself as he does to himself.
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Omg! You have the right to be mad like total right!!! OMG!! Tell him that he swore on your life and his and you wont be able to trust him if this continues! Talk to him like about trust and stuff!
♥ Michelle
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You have a right to be mad but he is a guy. and thats a typical guy thing.-trix
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Yeah, you can be mad at him. I would be mad too, especially if he looked at it more than once AND swore to you. I think that you should talk to him about the way you feel. Just to let you know though, lots of guys do look at porn, but I get why you're mad and stuff so defintely talk to him and just tell him that you really are upset that he would lie to you because you trusted him and you would like to be able to trust him again. Then see what he has to say and tell him your opinion.
((~)) C ((~))
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looking at porn is something that all guys do either because they want to feel cool or because they want to see naked girls. you def. have a right to be mad at him i mean hello he lied to you! but thats really where you should draw the line is just being mad at him because thats really all you should be..this isnt like break up terms or anything just something alot of guys do and feel weird about telling their girlfriends
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First of all I dont agree with most here that Guys "Have to look at porn" its a choice they make. Granted 95% of guys make that choice with the wrong head but it is a choice they make, especially if they are teen boys. Horomones are much stronger than reason.
However, to answer your question, One way to look at it is this...Does it matter where he gets hungry as long as he comes home for dinner? The important thing and I think what concerns you most is honesty in the relationship. I would talk to him and ask him to be honest about it in the future. If he feels its going to hurt your feelings He is going to cover it up. Just understand that a teen boy looking at porn in no way means he doesnt have real feelings for you.
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You CANT keep a guy from watching porn. He'll think you're so cool if you act chill about it. No guy wants to be told not to do something so natural. You might as well just cut off his masturbation priviledges (cause yes he does that also, probably to those girls on porn).. you know you should just go ahead and cut off his penis while you're at it.
And if you were a chill girl, he wouldn't feel like he had to lie to you in the first place. So maybe the problem is YOU..
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Jesus jumpin Christ, you kids overreact over anything don't you? First of all, you have no right to tell him what he can and can not look at. You can't stop him from looking at other women in real life, nor should you try to stop him from looking at pictures. If you really trust him, you would know that he can look at anything, but still see you as the best thing around.
Do you honestly think what he looks at when he is alone would affect your relationship in any way? Chances are, he just made the promise so you would shut up about it. It's really none of your business anyway.
Edit: Thanks for a leaving a 1. Now I know that you damned kids don't want to hear other people's opinions, you just want them to agree with you so you'll feel better about your stupid decisions. gg
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Of course you can be mad. Whenever anyone lies to you it betrays your trust and you should take that quite seriously. Now, that being said, guys have a bit of a problem these days. You see, porn is easy to get and 99% of guys really like it. The problem is we know that many women look down upon it for reasons we dont really understand. So, looking away from the utterly sexist and deeply insulting views given before me (such as "guys cant control their hormones"), you should probably be lenient with him because in his eyes he lied to save/ preserve your relationship. In reality he probably thought you were testing or judging him, not simply inquiring.
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yes you have a right to be mad at him, becasue he lied. looking porn is really no big deal. the lie seems odd though if he was going through the trouble of lying he might as well have jsut said never, so it leads me to think it was someone else using his computer like his dad or something. still he wouldnt have gotten defenseive then so it was probably him. so the final thing is you shouldnt care too much about the porn, but since he swore on you then he deserves waht ever is coming to him.
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why are you trying to restrict that your guy watches porn? There's nothing wrong with it and i really don't understand what the big deal is. You can have a boyfriend that loves and cherishes you yet who also likes to look at/watch porn. Maybe this is an issue of maturity because as you get older this stuff really doesn't matter. But honestly it's not as big a deal as your making it out to be-so he watches porn-could be worse he could be cheating on you. Teenage guys look at porn its a fact so you can try to restrict him and hold him down but i don't see what the point is...anyways stop stressing so much. good luck.
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Let your boyfriend do what he wants even tho porn is nasty and disguating
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yes, you have a right to bed mad! especially since he promised he wouldn't and made you trust him with that. but you have to understand, guys can't control hormones! forgive him, no one is perfect! but if he continues lying to you like he did, then something is definately wrong! i'm glad he apologized, it shows he does care.
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first of all, your a dumbass for thinking that .HE. doesnt look at porn
and second, hes a guy and thats what guys do. its not a big deal and its not like hes cheating on you.
you must be like 12
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