Nobody really comments on my wall and I see all these amazing pictures of other people with their friends having fun doing pretty much anything. but i only have a picture of myself cause i dont have any friends who invite me for things outside of school. i can literally count in a handfull how many times i've visited a friend's house, and I've been invited to less than 5 birthday parties (not family) in my entire life. I just look at the other people on facebook and feel so jealous. I want to remember high school as fun but I feel like Im just really missing out and I dont know what to do. How can I become better friends with people? I want best friends.. I've never really had one. Since I dont have anyone to hang with I spend most of my time on the internet, and even online I dont have best friends.. just nice people I randomly talk to. when i think about it it just makes me sad.. i mean im an optimistic person but i dont know what im doing wrong. i dont think i have major personality flaws or anything.. i feel like i should maybe get skinnier over the summer and wear better clothes.. but my family cant really afford much of the things i want. im really into music but i cant even get an ipod. i love fashion but the majority of clothes i own are from middle school and I'm 16! i just dont want to get depressed or anything, with keeping emotions to myself. i love to talk and have a good time but ughghgh. i look at other peoples facebooks and im just so jealous its redic. i never hang out with people.. this summer im in a new school and im trying to invite people for concerts cause i dont know how to invite people to my house. ive never done it before. where i used to live friends never came over.. and now i feel like im socially inept. i dont know how to handle that situation.. what to do and everything. i constantly worry over boring people or making them think im annoying. i got my first cell phone when i was 15 and i made a group on fb and everything and some people who i thought were friends posted their numbers and id text them and they'd be like "whos this?" so they dont even care about me. but those were people from my old school. i hope its different in this new one.. but i just feel heartbroken cause Im having the worst high school experience so far. i dont love being a loner.. im not really a quiet person. but i just dont fit in anywhere. and people seem to like me.. like i dont think i slip through the cracks, but nobody really goes anywhere with it and im too socially inept to know how to start convos like that! i dont care about being a loser or unpopular as long as i have friends. i dont even need that many.. 1 best friend, for start, would be amazing. Ive never met anyone who i've gotten along with great. i just feel like crying right now cause its so pathetic. and then i see albums on fb and people seem to have had the funnest time this year and they leave cute comments on each other's wall.. and im just a f***ing outcast. i like the way i am and everything.. i just want other people to like me too. it seems like i get along with people a lot better online than in RL. I havent even had a birthday party since age 10. im so mad i didnt have a sweet 16. my family was in the process of moving and we didnt have enough money to throw anything and i didnt even know who to invite.. even people i considered "friends" i wasnt really sure how they felt about me. im posting this now cause it was just a blow when i saw someone who had an awesome sweet 16 recently.. and then in the new town im in this girl i was talking to i thought we were becoming friends and she has a killer sweet 16, this huge party, and she doesnt invite me! i dont want the same thing happening again. gosh someone please please help me, i dont know where to turn. i have an older sister whos going through depression because of friend issues as well.. i dont want to go down the same route. things got very bad for her this year as well as my family.. its part of the reason my family moved to a different town.. in a totally different state. we're still trying to help her recover but there's still way to go. im not even best friends with my sister anymore.. we were when we were little but we broke off around the time i was 10 and she was 11. ever since we dont really know whats going on in each others lives.. like i didnt really know her friends or anything. we'd just go on the computer a lot and stuff. i wish we could be best friends though.. but its just hard now too cause of my sister's depression and we're very different people. we cant even share clothes, which i'd be fine with but she doesnt want it and my mom says its bad cause she shared things with her sisters and she talks to them a lot on the phone but i barely talk to my sister in person
my life from age 7 to now, age 16, is terribly boring. over the summer i rarely do anything significant cause my family cant go anywhere! my parents arent really interested in going to the beach or anything. i lived in freakin nj and i only went to the beach 3 times in 10 years. and i only went to new york city ONCE. cause my parents thought they should just work all the time while we stay at home on the computer all day! activities were too expensive.. i mean i play some sports but thats pretty much it you know. i cant even get a guitar or art supplies or etc. i cant get a job cause my parents wont pay for driving lessons or a car, and they wont want to drive me all the time. i feel like such a failure even though i know ive done some good things.. i feel like crying again. am i the only one like this? how can i change?
I feel like the highlights of my life so far was when I was 2-7 years old, and when I was 10. I dont want to grow up and tell my future kids that I didnt really do anything from ages 11-16 and maybe more.. like gosh i dont really have cool stories and stuff like other people. ive never really taken silly pics with friends or all those things i think people take for granted. all those movies like sisterhood of the traveling pants make me jealous too
please make this a priority question advicenators. i always turn to here when i have big problems cause people here really help. i know this is a long question but if i cant get help from here i seriously have no other place to go and i may become depressed myself. i just feel like banging my head against the wall now that i type everything and realize even more how much my life sucks. i mean even really poor kids often have good friends and everything. why is it so hard for me!
...and breathe.
I get the feeling that you really needed to get alot of that out, so well done for doing it.
The first thing I'm going to say is that you need to forget everything from your old school and start again. You're lucky to be able to start afresh in a completely new place.
I know you think it's hard to talk to people and even contemplate asking them over right now but it will get easier once you get the hang of it.
You're NEW in this school, so it's likely that people are going to be friendly towards you and make an effort to talk to you. It's very unlikely that everyone will just ignore you but you need to meet them halfway. Be really confident, take a deep breath and just start talking to people in your classes. Ask if you can work with them on a project, ask them questions about the work you're doing, anything just to get a conversation going.
Let's imagine a scenario here: you're in a class working on a particular topic and you turn to the girl next to you and say 'hey, I don't really get this, could you explain this to me?' If she's the type of person you'd want to be friends with, she'll probably be happy to help. Just be friendly, mention that you're new and maybe ask her if you could have lunch with her and her friends seeing as you don't know anyone yet.
Aside from classes, I bet there's loads of after school clubs and extra curriculer activities you can take part in at school. Sports teams, art clubs, debate clubs, pick some and just go for it. School clubs don't tend to cost much, if anything at all and it'll give you a great opportunity to talk to new people.
Now for inviting people to hang out. Once you've got talking to some people, don't be afraid to just ask them to hang out. If you don't want to go to your house then that's fine, suggest you go to the mall, the park, a movie, a concert or for a coffee.
Just say something simple, 'hey, I was going to see [insert band/movie/whatever] next weekend, do you want to come?'
You never know, people will probably start inviting YOU out too.
If you get rejected, don't let that put you back at square one. Some people are unfriendly and they're not the people you want to spend time with in the first place.
Eventually it should come more naturally and you won't be as afraid but you MUST find it in yourself to reach out and be confident.
Some extras :-
You mentioned not being able to afford an MP3 player etc..a really great way to listen to new music is Spotify. You pay a small fee a month and can listen to any band you like.
As for jobs, if there's nowhere within walking distance such as local shops/restaurants etc you could work at, try (with your parents permission) making some flyers for things like babysitting, dog walking, odd jobs etc and posting them around your neighbourhood. It's a good way to make some pocket money and won't require a car.
You don't need lots of money to get fashionable new clothes. Try looking in second hand shops, you can get some really nice things that look brand new as well as one off pieces that no one else will have. Another good idea is to accessorise. Jewellery, hats, bags etc are easy to find cheaply in those kinds of places and can completely transform an outfit.
Up until recently, I barely spoke to my sister. We still don't have much in common but it's much nicer when we get on. Try to reach out to her, ask her if she'd like to do something with you. Depression is very hard and I'm sure she'd appreciate your support. Sometimes siblings don't get on until later in life, I bet if your Mum was honest, she'd admit that she didn't always get on with her sisters.
Finally, I really think you should have a heart to heart with your parents. It seems to me like you've been sidelined recently what with your sister's problems when it's obvious you have your own. Choose a time when they're alone and in a good mood and mention to them how you've been feeling. Try and come to some agreements about what they can do to help you. I think having the support of your family will make you feel alot better.
Good luck, please feel free to inbox me with any problems you have with this process.
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Alright so it's exam week and my motivation level: low.
What tips can you give me that can help me focus better on my studies ?
I'm currently in the middle of my exams and I find it really hard to get down and study. These are some tips that work for me:
- Make sure you have a quiet space to work in with no distractions. I have a desk in my bedroom but I find it virtually impossible to study in there because there are too many temptations - my laptop, my TV etc. So I work in the study, where there's nothing to distract me. It might be a good idea to go to your local library as they usually have quiet rooms to study in.
- Don't try and do too much at once. What works for me is 40 minute sessions with a 10 minute break in between. I also give myself an hour's break for lunch.
- Don't be tempted to stay up all night studying either. During exam time, I get up at 8:30am, start studying at about 9:30 and finish around 5. I get an early night and a proper sleep, so that I'm able to get up the next day. If you use those hours you've set aside for studying, you shouldn't need to stay up cramming the night before an exam.
- Try to revise different topics in each session. So for example, do 40 minutes on one subject, take a 10 minute break, then do 40 minutes on another subject or topic. This ensures you don't get fed up and lose concentration.
- Make sure you're eating healthily. Too much sugar, salt and other bad things in your diet won't help with your concentration. Choosing light and healthy meals with give you alot more energy and focus. Similarly, I don't touch alcohol at all during the exam period.
- The night before an exam, get an early night. As I mentioned earlier, it's a bad idea to stay up all night studying. Read over your notes in bed but don't attempt to learn new things. My motto is 'what I don't know tonight, I'm not going to know tomorrow morning'.
- On the morning of an exam, get up in enough time to have a healthy breakfast and read through your notes. Give yourself enough time so you're not rushing around panicking.
- If an exam goes badly, understand that it is done now and there's nothing you can do about it now and that you will have to deal with it later. Don't let it ruin your studying for your other exams.
- Most of all, remember WHY you're sitting these exams. Don't pressure yourself but bear in mind their importance. You're the only one who can sit them for you.
Good luck!
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Hello :) I'm sure this question has been asked, but answers towards my question seem a little more specialized to me. So thanks in advance!
Typically my period lasts a good 6-7 days. I do have a boyfriend and we obviously do "stuff", if you will. He nor I have ever had sex, and we are very safe in terms of preventing pregnancy or heaven knows what. I make sure he pleasures himself with one hand, and me, with the other. If there's any need to switch hands, there is no other option than for him to either wash his hands or use hand sanitizer. I don't touch myself, so that's not a problem.
Now, I just got my period a day and a half ago, and it literally just stopped last night/this morning. I'm sure this is probably normal, but I really just wanted to make sure. I'm usually not a paranoid person, but after I typed in "I got my period for a day" on Google and a bunch of pregnancy results popped up, it made me a tad nervous.
I've been using a website to track my period for the past year and a half or so, and usually it's pretty accurate. My period is supposed to come on June 28th and I got it on the 14th. However, I understand that a 17 year old like me can have irregular periods.
Other than my recent salad obsession, my diet hasn't really changed? I haven't been practicing any unusual or different exercizes so I'm a little confused. Help!
Well done for being so sensible.
It's very, very unlikely that you're pregnant, so put your mind at rest.
Lots of things can affect periods - stress, medication, diet and sometimes just hormones. For now, don't worry about it. If it starts to happen regularly, then it might be worth just checking in with your doctor to make sure there's nothing going on.
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so my boyfriend has this friend who used to cut herself and now she has scars on her arms from where she used to do that. she was wondering if there might be any way to remove them? if scar remover would work? if so, which one would work best? any ideas?
I'd really reccomend Bio Oil.
It's formulated for use on scars and stretch marks and it really does work. Aside from laser surgery, which is very expensive, nothing can make them disappear entirely but Bio Oil works really well to make them alot less noticeable. If she continues to use it, she should find they fade to almost nothing eventually.
It's also relatively inexpensive and she should be able to find it in most pharmacies and online.
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My mom told me to not blow dry my hair a whole lot because the heat can hurt it and cause it to start breaking. I'm trying to grow my hair out really long and come back to school with long, beautiful hair as a new look next school year. I like to style my hair though and I have this setting on the hair drier that says COOL. Now, if I start blow drying my hair on the COOL setting will it still damage or hurt my hair in any way? I mean, it's not HOT heat or anything...it's just like cool, regular air...
Cool air is better as it lacks the heat which causes the most damage. However, blow-drying your hair at any temperature can still cause damage as it is so drying.
The best thing to do is to use a heat protection spray everytime you use any kind of heat source on your hair (straighteners, curlers, hair dryers etc). Just spritz it through your hair before you style it. I use one by TRESeme but there are loads of different brands out there to suit different hair types and budgets.
Another tip is to regularly use a deep conditioning treatment. This will maintain and improve the condition of your hair. Like the heat protection spray, there are loads of different types out there to choose from.
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can brith control help your periond be regular
Birth control can regulate your period to the point where you know exactly when it's going to arrive. For example, mine ALWAYS comes around 6pm on the Thursday after my last pill of the month.
It can also make your periods lighter and shorter, as well as giving you more control over them.
Speak to your doctor for the right type for you.
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1. Going out every night, getting completely wasted and coming home around midnight.
OR
2. Smoking weed everyday, by yourself, when your mom's not home.
I guess I want to see what other people think? My friend keeps pushing on what I'm doing is so much worse that what she is, though I don't think so. Opinionnnns! :) oh both of use are 16 and females.
Neither is better than the other because BOTH are illegal and dangerous.
Weed = illegal.
Underage drinking = illegal.
On top of that, both binge drinking and drug use can have a negative impact on your health.
EDIT: Your words were 'I guess I want to see what other people THINK'. I told you what I think and why. I didn't criticise your behaviour nor did I condone it. I apologise that you didn't like my opinion but when asking for people's thoughts, you should be prepared for opinions which don't support your own.
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I had sex with my girlfriend for the 6th time today, and she bleed a little.. and she just told me that i popped her cherry and it wasn't her period. but she's used tampons and she has already had sex with another guy before me... so is it possible that i really was the first to pop her cherry??
Yes, it's possible.
Some hymens take a while to break.
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Totally going to the beach tomorrow with my family but I'm on my period. I'm not going to tell my parents that though because I love the beach.
Do I wear a tampon in the water then?
Mom told me last year sometime that water stops you from bleeding. Like your period stops while you're in the water or whatever. Does that still mean I need a tampon to go swimming?
And is there a good tampon to use for swimming because I've never used tampons before! hah.
thanksss
While you're in the water, you won't bleed. However, as soon as you get out, you will and that could result in an embarassing situation.
It is best to use a tampon. Choose ones with an applicator as these are easier to use, especially for the first time. Tampax are a pretty reliable brand and have a big range. If you're looking for something discreet and easy to use then I'd reccomend Tampax Pearl.
Make sure you relax and follow the instructions carefully. Tampons can be tricky to use at first but once you get the hang of them, you should find them quick, easy and comfortable.
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Can sperm travel? Like if my boyfriend came on my leg by my vaginal area can i get pregnant, can it travel towards it? We always have unprotected sex and i was just wondering because he has came in my stomach or once even right next to my vaginal area and i was scared but it was a moment of passion but none got in that area, but i was just wondering if it can?
It's unlikely that you will get pregnant from sperm on your leg.
However, if you don't want to get pregnant, why on Earth are you having unprotected sx?
Just because your boyfriend doesn't ejaculate inside you, doesn't mean you're safe. During sex, 'pre-cum' is produced and this can contain a small amount of sperm.
If you don't want to use condoms then do yourself a favour and look in to birth control - whether it be the Pill, the injection or the implant, there are many options and one is sure to suit you.
Please bear in mind that only condoms offer protection against STDs.
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Crap. I was going through my mom's drawers because she use to put money in there when I was a kid and I ran into this thing. I didn't know what it was at first so I picked it up and examined it.
It's her vibrator. It isn't like a dildo though so you can't blame me for not knowing what it was at first! But still! Eww!
What do I do? Should I tell her I found it? I feel weird around her now!
It's not a pleasant thought that our parents actually have sex lives or masturbate but, like most people, they do.
Mentioning it to her would cause unecessary embarassment for both of you. Just forget about it and don't go through her drawers in future.
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What If Your Vagina Iches Really Bad, And When You Pull The Skin Away It Hurts Really Really Bad. What Does That Mean???
It could be any number of things, from an STD to a yeast infection. The only way you'll get a proper diagnosis is by seeing your doctor.
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My boyfriend and I had sex the other night, and he came on his hand.. and then 5 or 10 mins later he fingerd me..is there a chance that the cum got inside of me ? :///
There is a chance but it is small.
Wait until your period is due. If it doesn't come, take a pregnancy test. Do remember that stress can delay periods, so try to put this to the back of your mind until then. The chances are slim and it's more likely that you aren't pregnant than you are.
In future, be more careful.
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soo i was doing some facebook stalking of a good friend of mine. and she has alot of pictures with this one guy, so they're good friends. he is the most attractive guy i've ever seen haha. i added him as a friend and sent him a message like a week ago but he didn't say anything back:/ not to be cocky but i'm a pretty goodlooking girl. should i tell my friend i want to meet him? or would that just be creepy? anyy advice?
It's just a guy, it's not the end of the world. There are plenty of reasons why he hasn't messaged you back - he could be dating someone else, too busy or maybe he just isn't interested. Being good looking doesn't mean he'll automatically be interested.
If you are that keen, then ask your friend to introduce you. However, bear in mind that since he's already ignored your message, he might not react favourably. You also need to remember that you don't actually know this guy at all. Just like your attractiveness doesn't necessarily mean he'll like you, his doesn't mean that he'll be a particularly nice person or someone you'd be attracted to emotionally.
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When I get really turned on by my boyfriend my panties get wet. I mean, sometimes they get pretty soaked even when he hasn't touched me or anything down there. I don't really know why it happens but it does.
Ok, when my boyfriend cums it's wet, of course. His pants get a little soaked and it's similar to when my panties get wet we're making out and stuff.
Is it the same stuff then? I mean, if getting wet and cumming the same then? Sometimes I don't even have an orgasm before I get wet or cum or whatever it is! Is something wrong with me? I'm really confused about this.
No, they are not the same thing.
'Cum' contains sperm and is released at the point of ejaculation.
The wetness you get when you are turned on is your body preparing itself for sex. In order for the penis to enter smoothly, the vagina needs to be lubricated. So when your body senses arousal, it releases a natural lubricant to allow this to happen. You do not need to orgasm for this to happen.
Some females do release liquid at the point of orgasm but this is still different from that released by males for the simple reason that women cannot produce sperm.
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The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner by Stephenie Meyer came out recently (or so I heard). I looked in the local book shop for it but I didn't see it. Now, the place isn't like a Barnes and Noble so I don't know if I need to go to a larger bookstore or if they lied to me about it already being out on the shelves in some stores.
Where can I find this book and read it? And does it cost a lot? Because I've been saving my money up for something else and I can't spend a lot on this book right now but I totally want to read it because I loved all of the Twilight books by her too. (Team Edward!)
THANKS 2 YOU
This book is actually available to read free online as a special gift from Stephanie Meyer to her fans.
http://www.breetanner.com/
If you'd rather buy the book, then it should be available in most big book shops as it was released on June 5th. It's only a novella so it shouldn't be too expensive.
I buy nearly all my books from Amazon. It's usually the cheapest way to get books, old or new. Looking on there, you'd be able to buy a new copy for around 6/7 USD.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_13?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=the+short+second+life+of+bree+tanner&sprefix=the+short+sec
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If you and a friend were interested in the same guy what do you do? Do you go for it or back off? Thanks!
Which do you value more, the possibility of a relationship with this guy, or her friendship?
If you value her friendship more, then leave it alone. It's not worth falling out over.
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I have a really bad stomach ache it's because i have my period. It really hurts, any suggestions for relief?
There are lots of things you can do to help relieve period cramps.
The first thing to do is to take some painkillers at regular intervals. An anti-inflammatory such as Ibuprofen can be taken with Paracetemol for maximum relief. It may also be worth speaking to your pharmacist, as they may be able to reccomend some stronger over-the-counter painkillers specially for period cramps.
A microwavable heat pad or hot water bottle will also help. Make sure they aren't too hot and wrap them in a blanket if it's more comfortable. Heat relaxes the muscles and stops them from tensing up, which is what causes the cramps. A hot bath will work in the same way. Add some essential oils or nice bubble bath and try to relax.
It may sound strange but some gentle exercise can also help. Like the warmth of a bath/heat pad, stretching the muscles will stop them from tensing. A short walk round the block or some simple star jumps will do.
If after all this you're still suffering, make an appointment with your doctor. He/she will be able to prescribe you stronger painkillers and/or discuss the possibility of birth control. The Pill is also used to shorten and lighten periods as well as making them less painful, so this may be a good option for you.
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My friend said to take a ibuprofen pill to stop your period from coming for a few days. I want to go swimming today and I took one because my period is coming up due. I got to thinking and this is a really cool medicine then but how will I know if I'm pregnant if it has delayed my period, right? Will ibuprophen affect a pregnancy test then?
So, does ibuprofen really deley a period or what?
Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory. In terms of your period, the only thing it can help with is the cramps. It will not delay your period nor will it have any affect on a pregnancy test.
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what would you do if your ex said that he would kill himself if you didn't get back together with him? and completely means it. if he refuses to go to therapy and you've done everything you can but you don't want to be with him but definetly don't want him to commit suicide?
If you really think he's going to do it, call 911/999 (or whatever the applicable emergency services number is where you live) and tell them someone is threatening suicide.
You cannot let someone emotionally blackmail or guilt trip you into getting back together with them. If he's serious, get the authorities involved.
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