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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)
advice
Why would a family adopt me then when I'm out on my own(21 now) they just throw me away?
They never call or tell me that they care for me, once I was out the door when I turned 18, it was if they were done with me.
Our last conversation via text-
Me- Where are you at?
Mom- Home for a week
Me- Really nobody told me
Mom- I told you I would be home around September
(My thoughts- Why wouldn't she just call and tell me she was in town when she has been in town for ten days)
Me- You probably told my brothers you were in town.
Mom- No response
Me- I'll come by to get the rest of my things then you won't have to see me anymore
Mom- Suit yourself
Me- Why the hell did you even adopt me?
Mom- No response
Me- To ruin my life?
Me- You're just a wicked woman that claims to be a saint
Me- I read your journal where you said it's so much better when I'm not around so you should be really happy now
Me- Now you got nothing to say. Why don't you tell me you hate me and so does the whole family atleast you can be an honest person then. The only one that ever cared about me was granddaddy and he's gone now
Me- You're so blessed you can't even give anyone else a blessing. God gave you a family. Well guess what I got none.
Me- So be happy and sit on your pedistool and tell me how you hate me and tell me how there's always something wrong with me like you use to nag all the time. You say you don't gossip and put yourself above everyone but you're just a liar because you do gossip.
Me- So go tell the family like you always do and so that they can hate me. You have always been good at turning everyone against me.
Mom- There's no answer to satisfy a raging woman. I have your things in the living room when you want to stop by.
Me- You're so wrong. A raging woman? You can't even say a daughter or ever tell me that you love me. No wonder you don't ever call. You're such a saint. (She thinks she's a christian that does everything right)
Ugh. I know my tone here sounds a little wrong but I am enraged. I'm angry at her for never calling or caring about me. For gossiping to the family about my faults. For never being there to stand for me or help me. I have made mistakes in the past but so does everyone else. No one in the family wanted her to adopt me and now they got their wish. I'm gone and they think it's alright to treat me like this - someone that has no other family. They all threw me away. There's nothing to do to make this better. They're not going to change. Now what? How do people live without a family? Or anyone that cares about them? I never get any phone calls. Nobody there to support me or help me make the right decisions. Nobody there that gives a damn. Should I just kill myself? What the hell am I going to do? I have nothing.
Don't kill yourself. There's actually a lot of hope for your situation. Did you notice that in the conversation that you included with your question that you were doing most of the talking? How can you know that your parents don't care about you if you don't let them tell you so? I don't feel like telling someone that I care about them if they are attacking me. I don't feel like saying sorry if someone is attacking me even if I am sorry. I'm not saying that they haven't made mistakes, but you've made mistakes too, you said so yourself. You have to understand that they're human too. Did you notice that in the conversation that you included with your question that you almost immediately went on the attack? "Me- You probably told my brothers you were in town." As soon as you said that, what was your mom supposed to say? She didn't say that she told them. She didn't say anything at all because you were attacking her. Maybe she deserves it. I have no idea. The thing is though, that if you want better results and a better relationship with her, you have to try a different strategy. What you're doing now isn't working. You can't control other people or change their behavior. You can only control your actions and you'd be surprised how a small change in how you are approaching the situation may bring a positive reaction and eventually a positive relationship with them. It seems as if you're a little bitter about being adopted and maybe jealous of your siblings who have a biological connection to your parents. That pain that you feel is affecting the way that you communicate with your parents. That can't change and it's not their fault, try healing that within yourself. There is only so much that they can do. Yeah they're your parents, but that doesn't mean that you can't hurt their feelings. Being in their family, it's easier for you to hurt their feelings than most other people. You're not a child anymore. Try to be a little nicer even if they don't deserve it and see if it helps. Talk to them about the pain you feel and the problems you have without becoming confrontational and pointing out mistakes they may have made or ways that they may have wronged you. The relationship you have with them seems really strained, but a relationship comes from two sides. Change up your side and maybe they'll change up theirs. It's worth a try, right? You can have a good relationship with them, your conversation wasn't that bad. It's not like your mom started attacking you back when you began to attack her. That's an amazing sign. It shows that she's in pain about this too. Try to work this out and try to work yourself out. You'll really be surprised at the results that may come from a positive approach, even if they don't deserve it. You deserve a good relationship with them and if this is the way to get there then you owe it to yourself to give it a try. Good luck!!
I'm confused as to what to do. I feel like my boyfriend is lying tj me but have no hard evidence he is. For example when we got together, he was talking about how his grandmother left him her condo when she passed away. But yesterday texted me saying that his aunt is kicking him out of the condo. Which of course made me ask that if the condo was left to him how she could kick him out. He basically said she left him the condo but pays the rent to his aunt and since he's struggling financially because his employer cut his hours and he hasn't been working hes almost 2 months behind on rent so she told him he needs to move out. Another example, his hours were cut because business is slow, which is understandable. He asked for hours(supposedly) and was told he wasn't given hours that week because he had a few negative responses on the service surveys. A week later he claimed he talked to them and they said he got the best responses about his service, and was guaranteed hours the next week. He also said he talked to his boss, and was promoted and given a raise and he would have hours last week. Again he didn't work, until tonight. I asked him yesterday what hours he would have next week and he said he was working today, but not sure he hadn't gotten his schedule yet and he'd have it today. So I asked again today and now he's saying he hasn't gotten his schedule yet. It always seems as though he talks in circles and says one thing then later on contradicts what he said previously. Now I'm left to wonder if he's lying, if I can trust him and if I should break up with him(and yes I've discussed all these things with him multiple times and he blows it off or changes the subject)
It seems like maybe he's embarrassed about where he's at in his life right now. Guys can be really sensitive about that sort of thing. If he's feeling like crap and feeling like he's unsuccessful, he might be exaggerating and telling small lies to try to make himself feel better and make you proud. If this is the case, obviously it's the wrong way to go about it. He's making a big mistake by lying to you even if it is only because he's feeling down on himself and he does it to feel better. No matter what the reason, it has to stop, but it's good to consider that maybe he's not an intentional liar and an evil person. People have reasons for lying. There aren't many good reasons for lying, but some are more sympathetic than others. You should sit down with him and talk to him about all of these things. Tell him how you're feeling and try to figure out what's going on with him. Point out the inconsistencies. Ask him what's wrong. He needs to come up with a better way to deal with his problems than lying to you or feeding you confusing stories. Try to get things worked out. If he won't sit down and talk to you, that's cold. Drop him without thinking twice. If he's so insensitive to your feelings that he refuses to talk to you, he doesn't care enough about you for you to allow him to be with you. Don't make excuses for him and don't let him get away with blowing you off. You're worth more than how he's treating you. I wish you the best of luck and I hope that you can get all of this sorted out!
Hi,
Recently, I was clearing out the garage and came across some old home movies. I found loads from when I was just two days old, still at the hospital.
It seemed my family were really good in thinking ahead, and I think it would be a shame if I didn't capture a lot of the memories of this day and age for us all to look back on in 20 years.
I've tried looking for a good camcorder on amazon and so on. But they all seem to be terribly expensive. I've checked review sites, but there are so many models out there! I recently bought a 'vivitar' model, which was horrendous! The picture was grainy, and the mic wasn't sensitive enough. So I want to avoid this brand.
But do you have a good one? I'm not a fan of these new, small ones that are flat? But if it is good, I don't mind investing in it. Do you have a model that you use and enjoy?
It'll be used for loud, large family gatherings. Mostly indoors, but also outdoors now and again. My budget is maybe $200? The most important things are 1. Picture quality 2. Sound quality 3. Battery life
Like I said, there are so many different models, and in instances like these, google is little help.
Thanks!
I have a Flip camera and I absolutely love it. They're amazingly simple to use and shoot quality video. I'm not sure they make them anymore, but you can get one on Amazon still. The prices aren't inflated or anything. Make sure you get an HD one. There's no need to get the more expensive ones that have more space on them. I've never recorded more than an hour of video at a time. The only complaint I have about them is that if you zoom in and out while you're recording it's not always a smooth zoom and you may hear a faint noise in the recording. This is nothing though, considering the quality of the video that it produces and the very low price. My husband and I shot our wedding video with one and we couldn't be happier. Good luck in finding something! If you don't like the Flip idea, just go into a store like WalMart and check out the cameras on display. There are often inexpensive video cameras mixed in with the regular cameras.
http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=flip+camera&tag=googhydr-20&index=aps&hvadid=2246892431&hvpos=1t1&hvexid=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=1064981311590526741&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=e&ref=pd_sl_4xmpai8mf5_e
Hi, I'm 20 years old, and my boyfriend of 6 months is 22. We both really love eachother we are pretty much perfect i would say never fight pretty much always happy have good jobs. we want to move in together in may or june! so by then we will be dating a little over a year. the rent will be cheap and i wont have to worry about school much by then. the only problem is, my mom. im not sure what or how to tell her that we are thinking about this. we plan on one day getting engaged so that moving in isnt just something we decided we actually want to do something after. i just need advice on all of this.
Moving in together before you have a stronger commitment than just being boyfriend and girlfriend may not be the best idea. If you're going to get engaged anyway, why not do it first? Yes, lots of people that are not engaged or married live together. Sometimes it ends badly, but sometimes it doesn't just like any relationship. It's not like there's a problem morally in today's day and age with people living together before they're engaged or married. You're certainly free to do it without being scrutinized too much. It's just one of those things where you want to make sure that he's as committed to you as you are to him. Actions speak much louder than words. A person can say they're ready for something, but when they get down to it, maybe they're not quite ready just yet. You can feel ready in your heart and end up being surprised when your readiness is tested and you're really not quite ready yet. Are you ready to get engaged? If not, you may not be ready to move in together. It's easy to think about how wonderful it would be and how much money you'd save and forget about whether this is a step you're ready to take. If you really are ready to move in together, you're at a place in your relationship where you're probably ready to be engaged to one another too. You may disagree with me about some of the things I've already said, but there's a bigger reason why it's a good idea to get engaged first than just to prove that you're ready to move in together. Your mom. The two of you could be as ready as ever, but other people cannot feel or know what the two of you feel and know. They're outsiders, they're likely going to see it how I see it even if it isn't the reality of the situation. They're going to question your commitment and readiness no matter how strong it is. That's just the way of things. Your mom's reality may be wrong, but it's still her reality and what she will believe. Only by becoming engaged can you prove to the world that your relationship is legit, which can be an important thing to do. An older person may not see things as you do. They may be much more traditional. If the two of you are engaged, it will be much, much easier for your mom (and others) to accept the living arrangement that you have in mind. It's not like you have to go out and buy an expensive ring, you can wait a few years for that if you want. Just get a cheaper one and show yourselves and the world that you're together for the long haul. Why not get engaged now if it'll make things easier? There's nobody saying that you can't do it twice. Once now and a better proposal later. My husband and I got engaged before we moved in together and it worked out really well for both us, and our families. Trust me, it's a good idea. There's no reason not to and so many reasons why it's a good idea. I wish you the best of luck and your mom will really appreciate if the two of you are engaged before you move in together. She's much more likely to approve and much less likely to put up much of a fight about it. Come on, don't you want to call him your fiancé? :)
i m in india aurangabad maharashtra.
my married friend affair with married woman last 3 years. i m very jelous. why she choose my friend nad not to me ?
i m single. i m clearly avoid mariied woman relationship. but jelously why they happily go ahed. that woman husband is a hard drinker. she have a 10 year son. why she is not thinking about her future. my friend is selfish , when attraction is lost ( sex ) they are not interested that woman.
in this matter i m in highly tension. i meet that woman 2-3 times. she is known to me.
but jelously why she choose my friend and not me because i m handsome and single.
kindly suggestion this matter
thanks.
She probably chose your friend because he is married and you are not. It doesn't have anything to do with how attractive, intelligent, or desirable you are. Since he is married, she probably doesn't think it is as risky to have an affair with him. It is something that they have in common. He isn't going to expose her as his mistress because that would mean exposing himself to his own wife as an adulterer as well. If you're handsome and single, go out and find a different woman. Even if she is attractive, like you said, you don't really want this woman anyway, she seems kind of trashy. Go out and find single women to date and try not to worry so much about married people that are cheating. There's no need to make that your problem. I understand how it could make you jealous, but it really has nothing to do with you. If you're worried about your own attractiveness, you could lose confidence and it may be more difficult to attract a woman that wants to date you. Stop worrying about what's wrong with you and you'll appear more confident and attractive to prospective partners. Like I said, nothing is wrong with you, she is only with him because he is married. If you had been married, she may have chosen you instead. Good luck.
I plan on working out twice a day, drinking water and eating 1200-1500 calories. Is this possible?
Absolutely. I recently lost 10 pounds in 2 months (I stopped because I got to where I wanted to be) and my husband lost about 60 pounds in 5 months. We did this without cutting any foods out of our diets. Pizza, cookies, and french fries were all fine. The only thing we cut was calories. For me, pretty much all I had to do was cut down on my snacking. Your body needs a certain number of calories to maintain its current weight. If you cut that amount by about 500 a day, you'll lose weight. It takes about 3500 calories to gain 1 pound and the same amount to lose one pound. So, if you cut 500 calories out of your diet each day, you should lose about a pound per week. This is only effective if you are honest and slightly overestimate your calories consumed and underestimate your calories burned. You have to record every single thing that you eat, even if it's just one M&M. It will not be effective if you try cutting out too many calories right from the start. Eat normally for a week and record everything see how many calories you're consuming. Cut about 500 from that and slowly start cutting more. You don't want to fail and cutting too much at once would be setting yourself up for failure. Here's a few tips I have for you that worked for us. Weigh yourself only once per day at the same time each day. Better yet, only do it once every three days or once every week. Your weight can fluctuate 2-4 pounds throughout the day. To get an accurate reading, just do it in the morning when you get up. Do not be discouraged if you exercise really hard and the next day it looks like you gained 3 pounds. You didn't really. Try not to become too obsessed with the numbers on the scale. It's easy to. The water idea is a great one. If you want a glass of something other than water every once in awhile, you should go for it, though. The reason why most diets fail is because they're not sustainable. Say you're on a low-carb diet. Once you're done with the diet, you go back to eating carbs because you like foods with carbs and you gain the weight back. Or, you just can't maintain the diet and you end up cheating and giving up. Your goal is to make sure that you are happy. You don't really have to change your life too much to lose weight. Even though I'm here saying you can eat cookies, I'm not saying that's the best idea all of the time. You could eat nothing but chicken wings and lose weight, but you would not be very healthy. Another warning I have for you is that if you're going to drop your calories to the level that you're planning to, you're going to be hungry at points throughout the day. I cut out breakfast and had a small lunch, so by the afternoon I was really hungry. I tried to stay between 1300 and 1500 calories and I was definitely hungry at times. I kept it this way, though, because I was able to have a big, normal sized dinner, which I needed in my life. You have to figure out how to ration out your calories for you for each meal. I'm not sure if you're familiar with www.livestrong.com, but they have something on their website called MyPlate. This is what I used to track my calories. It's a great tool and it kept me honest. I really recommend this website. Another website I recommend is www.344pounds.com. This guy's story is what inspired me to try counting calories and he gives a lot of great advice and motivation if you go back to the beginning when he first started out. My last bit of information for you is that if you are female, it is dangerous to go below 1200 calories. For males, I believe that it's 1500. Unless you are very overweight, you should only be losing about 5-7 pounds per month. Even if you only lose 20 pounds by January, you're well on your way to your ultimate goal of 35. Wouldn't you rather do it safely, right, and effectively, than meet your ultimate goal too quickly? Aim for 20 pounds by January. It's more achievable. If you end up losing 35 pounds by then, good for you, but make sure you are setting goals that are challenging, but still attainable. As long as you really stick with counting every single thing that goes in your mouth, you'll do great. Good luck!
I've just started at university but am finding it really hard to make friends. While everyone else was able to make friends before freshers week in halls, I was unable to get accommodation because of living too near to the college- Now everyones become "clicky" and I'm left on my own. I find it difficult to make new friends at the best of times, but I've really been trying this week - but still, everyone I try and make conversation with ends up walking off with their friends. How can I make friends??
I had a similar problem. It can be really hard. Honestly, even though it feels like it, you're not alone in your loneliness. There are tons of people on campus in your situation and the best part is they're not all loners and weirdos, most of them are really rather normal. There are a few things you can try. Go to meals early. Like, at 11:30 or 4:30 if you can. Before I made friends, I didn't want to be embarrassed by not being able to find a place to sit by myself in a crowded dining hall. I'd always go early and I saw a lot of other people doing that too. It takes guts, but find someone that's sitting by themselves and just ask if you can sit with them. They'll probably really appreciate it and you might make a friend out of it. Another thing you can try is joining a club of some sort. At both of the colleges I went to, there were frequently tables out with people from clubs trying to recruit members. I don't know if you're religious, but the Christian clubs are a great place to start. They're really accepting. A third thing you can try is to try to make a connection with people in your classes. I know that for me, I would pretty much go to my classes and then sulk in my room. There's probably a few people in every one of your classes that's dying for friendships too. Honestly, all it takes to make friends in college is guts of steel. You just have to walk up to someone and strike up a conversation. You'll find people will usually react well to you if you do this. Whatever you do, don't worry about your situation. There are a lot of people in college that don't make friends until like, a year in. It's going to suck and it may take a little while, but you'll find people. Good luck! :)
17/f
The other day I was sitting in a room studying at college, when I noticed an ex from a few years ago sitting outside the room (theres a window) on the computer.
He was telling some other random girl about how eheh wants to break up with his girlfriend of 8months ago oh how it was very pressurized. But he was practically shouting it-you know when its obvious he wants you to know.
Should I tell this girl because basically hes telling everyone else before her and I know how bad that made me feel.
It might be best if you just stay out of this one. It may hurt and you know what this girl is in for, but you don't want to get involved in this. It could turn sour for you. If he's going to break up with her, that's a good thing for her. In this case, it's probably best to just let things go as they will. Intervening could get you stuck in the middle of a situation you want nothing to do with. My advice to you is to avoid the drama. She'll make peace with it just as you have. You can't protect the world and sometimes it's best not to. She'll be okay. If you feel you want to help her, wait until after it's over. It might be nice to know that she's not alone in what she's going through and that someone else has been there too. She might want someone to talk to that's willing to listen. Just don't get involved before then. A relationship is about two people. He's doing the wrong thing by getting other people involved and by butting in, you would be to, at least at this point. It may be painful to stay out of this, but let it run its course. Good luck. :)
I am 17 and a senior in high school, trying to cope with the insanity of my mother.
Let's start off with saying she has gone overboard. She doesn't ever do anything around the house, she never takes care of my baby brother, and she doesn't ever spend time with my siblings and I like a real mother should. She's always in the garage, on the computer, on her phone, and smoking. Yet she claims she's quitting. My stepdad is in Michigan for two more weeks for a job, and I know she's stressed out, but that gives her NO right to treat me the way she does.
She always complains she never gets a break from my brother. It's her kid. She shouldn't have to have a break from him. I have school, homework, chores, and on top of that, she doesn't clean, so because I can't stand looking at the mess and my siblings don't clean up, I automatically take the stand and clean.
Yesterday, she told me to take my brother to a football party with my boyfriend and his family. There was absolutely nothing to do. She said she didn't feel like watching him. We took him for three hours because she threatened me and yelled at me, saying she'll make me babysit from Saturday to Monday morning (remember, I have school and wake up at 6:30), and so I got my brother and we sat around all day, except for when we took him to the park and pool. So we had him from 3 to 7. She said she didn't care when we brought him home, but when we got there to drop him off, she screamed at me and yelled, "YOU ONLY HAD HIM FOR AN HOUR!" And proceeded to bitch, so my boyfriend and I ignored her and took my brother to the park at 8. She says I never do anything for her. I babysit and clean all the time and she owes me about thirty bucks in babysitting money, and I need it to pay for my senior year.
She told me to talk to her today about how I am feeling, and I did. I told her I am done going out of my way for her because nothing is ever good enough and I miss my mom. I want a mom who spends time with me and chats with me about my relationship. She said she doesn't care and she's not my friend, she's my mom, and she always says I'm ridiculous and being emo. And that's why I don't talk to her about things. She said she doesn't care what I think or how I feel and she's gonna sit in the garage as long as she wants to because she's the adult and she's going to make me watch my brother however long she wants. She said if I don't like the way I am treated, I can move out and live with my boyfriend if "he gets a fucking job". He's graduated and struggling with a job, and he's 18. She is emotionally abusing me. She isn't my friend anymore and all she seems to care about is herself and her husband. She always complains how stressed out she is, and when I try to help, it's still not good enough. I have decided to ignore her completely and not even talk to her. Why do I want to live with someone who doesn't care about how I feel or what I think?
I need help... I am tired of being abused: both emotionally, physically, and verbally. She hits me, pulls my hair, threatens me, and pushes me, and makes me feel absolutely worthless. She doesn't help me with college plans because she said I need to take of my life myself, when I'm still technically only a kid and I have no idea what I am doing. I feel helpless, terrified, and I have no where to turn. I am scared of her and I am crushed that she doesn't give a shit about me. I am so upset that I've lost my old mom. She used to be different before my brother came along. Now, it seems like all I am good for is being the nanny. I hate her with every part of me now. I don't want to live her anymore. I don't deserve this. I'm not a bad kid, I do what I'm told and I make good grades and I just don't think it's right to make me feel worthless. Aren't you supposed to feel safe in your house? Happy?
I'm afraid and helpless. My boyfriend wants me to live with him and his parents, but if I do that, I can't take all my stuff and my cat, because his parents have limited space and are allergic to cats. I'm afraid if I leave, my mom will give away my stuff and I will be a burden to everyone who wants me out. I won't have a lot of transportation to school or anything to pack for lunch like I do here, because I am a vegetarian.
So I'm kind of at a crazy moment. I don't know what to do. I don't want the cops involved or any of my siblings taken away, because I am the only one she treats this way.
Please help... I can't take this anymore. I WANT OUT.
I know that there's a lot going on and that your life sounds like it really sucks, which as a lot to do with your mom, BUT have you ever stopped to think about her? Yeah, she's the mom. Yeah she's treating you like crap. Yeah she's the adult and she should care about her kids and everything, but it really sounds like there might be something wrong. Instead of accusing your mom of things and treating her like a terrible mom (which is never going to get a good reaction even if it's true), try asking her what's wrong. Ask her why she has changed. Ask her if she is okay. If you show genuine concern for her, you may get better results. Clearly what you've been doing isn't working. She is a human being with issues of her own and you're not much of a kid anymore. Maybe she just needs help. Try the caring approach. Act like an adult rather than an angry kid that expects their mom to be perfect. It seems like she's going through a rough time and you're not giving her much of a chance. Yeah she has a lot of improvement to do and it sounds like she has changed a lot, and she's treating you badly, etc. etc., but there's got to be a reason for all this. If she was a great mom and now she's not, something must have happened. Try to find out what's wrong. Aren't you genuinely concerned? Don't you care about her anymore? Try having a calm, serious, carefully worded conversation with her where you tell her what you're feeling. It's worth a shot, right? If she's going to stay the way she is, you'll be okay. You're 17. You're not really a kid anymore. You can do without her. It sucks, but you're old enough to be alright. Be above all of this. It won't be that long until you're out of there even if it seems it now. Good luck.
How long after getting a perm, can I have my hair cut shorter and get another perm?
Perms can last for a really long time. They're not that popular anymore, even though they're beautiful so I'm not sure that you'll find any good advice online. Talk to a hairdresser. Even if you aren't going to go to a hairdresser, they'll be able to give you the best advice. You can probably even do it over the phone. This seems like a question that would be easy enough for someone with some knowledge on the subject to answer. Probably nobody on here has any idea! Good luck!
Hi. So long story short there was this guy I was in love with last year, and he liked me too. We went to different colleges but hung out whenever possible. in the nicest way possible I think he was a little bipolar he would always randomly get short and cold with me and the next day act like nothing happened. Then one day when everything was going perfect he told me he was busy and would text me later. (we texted every hour we were awake) and then he never did. So i texted him the next day and he explained i did nothing wrong and he was just busy. But he didn't talk to me for a month. I was never so heartbroken so when he did text me he built me up and then stopped talking to me again after a week. He knew what kind of power he had over me and took advantage. He has the biggest ego which was really aggravating. I decided not to text him on his birthday to show him i don't care anymore (when i still really do) so he texted me and was being so not like himself. He was being really perverted and asked me if i touched myself if he could get a nudie. So i told him off once and for all saying he meant a lot to me and this conversation proved it was never mutual. He never responded and hasn't talked to me in 4 months. I know i should get over him but i want him back more than ever. Im so tempted to contact him. any opinions on the situation?
thanks so much for the advice and help in advance (:
It sounds like maybe college has changed him a little. The two of you have grown apart. If he asked you for a naked picture, he's probably become that kind of person. He's not just asking you, it's who he's become. A guy doesn't just ask one girl for a naked picture, they ask pretty much all the girls that they think they can without getting into serious trouble. You know that the right thing to do here is to cut him out of your life as you have been doing. Do not fall for the temptation to contact him. You will get over him in time. It's dangerous for you to talk to him until you get over him. He could hurt you more or worse, you could end up in some sort of already-damaged relationship with him. He's not the guy for you and you know it. You've just got some lingering feelings for the guy that he used to be, the guy that you think he could be, or the guy that you thought he was. He is none of those. Just let it go. You know in your heart that that's what you need to do. Good luck. You'll find someone better, really, you will. :)
I'm 14, female and is doubting my sexuality. I know this is the age of finding yourself but I have a suspicion that I may be bi. This girl(not putting name) said she liked me, and ive said I have been bi now for 2 years for I have had relationships with girls and boys. but after I said no im straight. But now spending more time with her im growing feelings for her, and when she told me about another girl who was hitting on her I got really annoyed and jealous and now I find myself telling myself im bi then that im straight. I don't know what you do in a lesbian relationship so don't want to go out with her, im scared if the truth I think, doubting myself. Please help its tearing me apart.
Like NinjaNeer said, just relax for a sec. Today, there's all this talk about being gay, or bi, or straight, or whatever. It's really not as important as it's made out to be. Some people know that they fit into one of those categories, others don't know, or they fit into a different category altogether. It can be really confusing when something as private and as unique as one's sexuality seems to be at the forefront of everyone's thoughts. Just know this: it's simply not important. Just be in relationships with people you like. You don't have to be bi, or straight, or anything. There's no need to label yourself, just be you. Have you tried talking to her about what you're feeling? Maybe she could help somehow. Good luck! :)
So I'm 17 and I've noticed for a long time that I hiccup at random times of the day everyday. Is there a reason for it?
Some people get hiccups more easily than others. A hiccup is just a muscle spasm of your diaphragm, which is what controls your breathing. Since your diaphragm is at work 24/7 it's prone to muscle spasms. Do you get muscle spasms in other places too, like your eyelids or arms? If it isn't really affecting your life or anything, don't worry about it. This sounds pretty normal. If you're worried, just ask your doctor. Good luck!
whats some good porn sites that are not blocked by the schools.and i need to know how to get a girl to have sex with me.
Easy there, tiger. What, do you think there's some sort of password for getting into a girl's pants? You don't "get a girl to have sex with you" by thinking of girls as nothing more than an object to pleasure yourself with. You'll never get a girl to date you, much less want to have sex with you with that way of thinking. If you want to ever have sex with anyone, you're going to have to change how you talk about and how you treat girls. Believe it or not, a girl is a human being with needs and feelings of her own. You have to build a relationship with a girl that you can actually get along with and then wait until the both of you are ready. Sex is a lot more complex than simply penis + vagina = pleasure. You have to want to have sex with a particular girl because you like her, not just want to have sex with anyone that will let you. Sex is something special that happens between two people, not something that happens randomly to satisfy your animal desires. That may be what it seems like when you watch porn, but that's not what it's like in real life. Grow up a little bit. Use your brain rather than letting your hormones and fake sex videos guide you. Getting a girl to like you and to date you is really rather simple. Do you have a father or father figure in your life? Maybe start by asking him what to do. A dad-type person would be able to give you the best advice on this subject. Best not to word it the way you worded it here either. If you're that horny, take care of it yourself instead of potentially ruining some poor girl's life. You may not have to worry about getting pregnant, but she does. It's just not fair of you to expect girls to give it up like that, especially with the risks involved. If you're able to talk a girl into having sex with you, you'll always be remembered by her as an evil, horrible person that talked her into something that she shouldn't have done. What you need is to find a girl you like and see if she wants to be your girlfriend. Then, you need to be a kind, wonderful boyfriend, not a sleazeball who is just going to try to get into her pants. I'm not trying to be horribly mean here, but you really need to think about what you said. Any female and probably a lot of guys too are going to take serious offense to it. I'm just going to ignore the question about porn. How ridiculous can you be? First off, it can't be done. Second, no girl is going to think you're mature enough to want to give themselves to you if you're wanting to try to watch porn in the school library. Seriously. Like I said, if you want to ever get to have sex with anyone, calm down, treat and talk about girls as human beings, and grow up. Good luck.
if he asked to have sex
You have to decide for yourself if you're ready. Unfortunately, you didn't give a lot of information about your specific situation. If you're in a relationship with him and you tell him that you don't want to because you're not ready, he may break up with you. That's what a lot of girls are worried about. The thing is, no matter how much you like or love him if he's going to try to threaten you or force you to have sex with him he is not a good person at all and is not the right guy for you. Having sex before you're ready could seriously damage your whole life. Being ready for sex is a lot more complicated than just feeling ready. Since you're asking this question, my guess is that you're not even sure if you feel ready. Go to this website and go through each of the steps: http://www.wikihow.com/Know-if-You-Are-Ready-to-Have-Sex. This will help you decide if you're ready or not. It is the worst idea in the world to have sex before you're ready even if it means losing someone that is special to you. If he's really that special, he'll be okay with it anyway, right? :)
Good luck!
I told that guy that i like him but he like me only as a friend he is friendly with me but how to get him in my life i really like him a lot I am from India and my age is 18
Give him time and space. There is a chance that he will end up liking you, but not if you bother him. It was very brave of you to tell him that you liked him and it wasn't necessarily in vain. When you find out that someone likes you, it may be shocking at first, but knowing that someone likes you will sometimes make you like them back. It may take some time, though. Give it a few weeks and then ask him one more time. If he still says that he just wants to be friends, unfortunately, you'll have to let it go. Good luck!
This may or not be a typical question but Im sure it will throw you for a loop.....! Im a straight guy who is not attracted to men at all, even in the slightest detail. I had early sex as a child with a friend of the same sex. Here is the million dollar question. I get a feeling of power and a huge sexual turn on by xdressing as a girl with all the hot stuff, wig and make up and all and have been told by the same sex I am attractive and sexy and passable when dressed up and I have had sex with males while dressed which is a huge turn on, however !!! here is the question......as soon as it is over and I go back to being a male, Im the straightest guy on the planet and have always been seriously sexually attracted to females my whole life ! I dont think about males or even being with one except when I dress and even then, I dont feel attracted to men, just the act of being a girl with one....I know myself well enough that I know Im NOT gay or even when I ask myself am I bi-sexual, that doesnt even apply in my mind because I ask myself am I just as attracted to men as women and the answer is seriously NO....is there a medical or psychlogical name for what I do? Is it normal? Any advice for me would be more than enlightening and would be appreciated more than u could ever know.
I agree with russianspy1234. There are way more than three categories. You don't have to be gay, straight, or bisexual. Sexuality is a lot more complex than that. There are others out there with your orientation, you're not the only one. Hard to believe, right? Have you ever heard of the website fetlife? The best way I can describe it is that it's like myspace for fetishes. If you're interested in this sort of thing, you can probably find and chat with others on fetlife about your unique orientation and what you're going through. As with any online situation be careful what personal information you reveal and remember that not everyone is necessarily who they seem. I'm not sure of your age, but I think that you may have to be 18 to sign up. Good luck!
Need a sure fire way to kill myself, preferably without pain but cheap and easy to do at home. Don't believe in god so please none of that shit and not asking for counselling, am 38 and of sound body and mind and have made my decision so just after practical advice / suggestions, tried on 31st Jan 2012 and don't want my family to see another failled attempt
No one on here is going to tell you how to kill yourself. It's just not going to happen.
Your family is not upset with you for failing to kill yourself, they're upset and sad because you're trying in the first place. You must have a lot of crap going on in your life to want to do this. Suicide is not something that someone of sound body and mind consider so seriously. There must be a lot of turmoil going on in your mind for it to come to this. I'm not saying you're crazy, but your head isn't in the right place. This is never the right thing to do and it's not going to make your family feel good if you succeed. It is not the right thing to do and it will absolutely cause your family pain for the rest of their lives. You may not believe in God and you may not want counseling, but you do need help. Have you tried to get help of any kind? Suicide is permanent. Try getting help first. You've got more to lose than you think and even though it may not seem like it's going to happen, with a little time, you could be living a wonderful life. Give it another chance. Call this number to see what they have to say. There's really no harm in it. 1-800-273-8255
How to stop my habbit of gambling.I have lost all my earning&saving.I started thinking of borrowing money.
I could'nt work and sleep well.Yor advice is much appreciated
Check your local newspaper. There are probably gambling support groups in your area. You should go to a meeting and see if it's something that could help you. You know that this is a problem and you know that you have to stop. That's awesome. A lot of people don't make it that far. Try calling this number 1-800-522-4700. They should be able to give you more detailed information on what you should do and where to seek the help that you need. I noticed that there are also other hotlines specific to the state that you live in. Go to a search engine and search "[insert your state here] gambling hotline". You know what you need to do and I'm here to tell you that you can do it. You're not the first to have this problem and certainly not the last. You're not alone either. Others have been in your shoes and they have fixed their lives. You can too!
My twin sister and I are very good friends with this boy Sam.
I am actually very close with him, and introduced them. I thought they liked each other more than friends, and she was very happy.
Prom is coming up. She thought maybe he would ask her. I told her he DENFITELY would. i thought they had hit it off...
anyway, I got her hopes high.
and yesterday I talked to him, he totatllyyy doesn't see her like that, and said he FOR SURE is not asking her.
He didn't mean this meanly, i don't want him to come off like adick. but my twin is counting on him to ask her...and he isn't going to.
How do i tell her this??
I'm guessing that this was your question too.
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=607791
Look, it seems as if this guy is a major issue for the two of you. All of this drama and confusion needs to stop. This is what needs to happen: The three of you need to sit down together and talk about all of this. It's the mature thing to do. Sit down. Talk. Get everything out. Figure out exactly what everyone is thinking. None of this stuff is earth-shattering. It shouldn't be an issue, but it is because no one is talking to anyone else. The three of you have to figure this out. The worst thing in the world would be if this guy got between you and your sister and ruined the relationship that you have with the closest person in your life. It's not like he's doing this on purpose, but his existence is making your relationship with your sister more difficult than it should be. I'm not saying you have to get rid of him, but the three of you MUST talk about this like adults. Figure out what's going on and just end the drama now. There's no need for all of this. All you have to do is talk. It may seem like the hardest thing in the world when you're a teenager, but it's absolutely the option that will have the best results. Organize this as soon as possible. It may be awkward at first but all of you will feel sooo much better once this happens. This situation is either going to end in anger, fighting, yelling, and pain or you can solve things now by simply talking. Trust me, this is going to get much worse if you don't figure it out now. Good luck!