Shortie8959's

advice column

about

advice

Okay so i've liked this guy for about 4 years...he is my best friend and i know he doesn't like me because he told me. Thats fine, but the problem is, i can't seem to get over him...no matter what i do, i can't stop thinkin bout him or comparing other guys to him...does anyone have any advice?

You just have to start flirting with other guys. It'll be hard at first, but you'll eventually stop thinking about him and you'll be thinking about someone else! Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

like a week ago my boyfriend and i were messing around and i gave him a hand job (he put a condom on) and while i was giving him a hand job he was holding his penis and then when i was done he fingered me and my period hasnt started yet but ive been having cramps lately and i usually get cramps but could i be pregnant?

There's a really low change you're pregnant. I really don't think you are. Sometimes periods don't come on time especially in the first 3 years or so. And cramps usually happen before and at the beginning of your period. I don't think there's anything to be worried about. But if it doesn't come in about a week, I would see a doctor about it. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

does anyone now how to get a boy to like a girl

You just have to flirt with them. And be yourself. If a guy can't like you for who you are, then they're not worth your time. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

OK my boyfriend just dumped me yesterday and eh used the line, "I love you, but i don't want a girlfriend right now." Has anyone gotten that one before? If any boys see this what does it actually mean? is it just a nice way to dump me becuase how can you *love* someone but not wanan go out with them?

I think it was just a nice way to let you go. Because if he said he still loves you, then why would he break up with you. It doesn't make sense. Or maybe he's just scared of being in a serious relationship, which a lot of people are. Just tell him how you feel and I hope everything works out. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

Me n my two friends Lizzie n Jess are going to the movies. Lizzie is riding with her cousin, and is going to be hanging out with her the whole time. Me n Jess hate Lizzies cousin, and don't want to ride with her, because we've had trouble with her cuz in the past. So, me n Jess have a ride there BUT not a ride home. We're meeting Lizzies boyfriend, and Lizzies like one of my best friends.. We asked her bf to take us home n he said sure. But Lizzies pissed and doesn't want us to. I'm not like that, and I'm not going to do anything with him, or act like a whore around him n stuff. I don't think she trusts me. She acts like she doesn't care, but you can tell when she does. What should I do?

You have to tell her that you're not like that! You probably have already, but you just have to keep telling her, so it'll get in her head. Just remember that true friends will trust each other, and she still doesn't trust you, she's not a true friend, even though you think she is. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

I still have major feelings for my ex boyfriend.. he was my first love/ and first person. But we broke up and now he's going out with his girl who's really close with him ( i hate her ). He told me that he wanted to stop talking to me. (but you kinda have to know him to realise what he accualy means, its so confusing, but he says that stuff and doesnt mean it.. he just says that -pretty sure). So i havent talked to him in like 5 days and OMG i really want to so bad, but im not. So my question is- is this the right thing with not talking to him?.. maybe he will miss me or realise some things.. is it for the best? what do i do.. thanks so much..

Aw, I'm sorry. Well, whether he means it or not, he might just be saying that, because he has a gf and he's afraid of falling back in love with you while he's got a gf. It's going to take a while, but you'll get over him. You just have to start talking to other guys, trust me, it'll help. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

i have this friend and she wants to kill her self bc she thinks she doesnt deserve to be in this world and she is like always tellin me and her other friends that she is gonna kill herself and everytime she goes in a room she looks for sharp stuff to kill her self with and i get freaked out.. so if you have any advise plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz tell me i need help! me and her other friends are tryin to make her eat, not kill her self, think positive but nothing is workin plz help

Tell her that if she decides to leave the world behind, she's also leaving you and your friends behind. Tell her that you really care about her, and if she died, you would be sooooo sad and wouldn't know what to do. Somehow, you have to prove to her that she is loved. Try getting a party together with her family and friends, and she'll realize that people really do care about her. Also, point out everything she's accomplished over the years! She feels like she doesn't deserve to be in this world. I'm not sure why she feels that way, but if you do, you have to prove her wrong somehow! Make her a nice card with a note, it shows that you care. Good luck to you and your friend.
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

I was in Intenseive Care in the hospital for about 2 weeks because of something serious. One of my closest guy friends visited me at LEAST once a day, not that I minded or anything. But then, one of my last days in the hospital, he asked me out. Just then, the nurse walked in, and said that I porbibly wasn't thinking straight because of the IV. Well, I don't no if he really likes me, or is afraid that if something like that (me being in the hospital) happeneds again, he might lose me. I'm afraid that if i go out with him, that I'll only be doing it because I would feel guilty if I didn't. But, I don't no if he really likes me or not. What should I do? *Thanks*

You have to tell him how you feel. Write him a note and ask him if he likes you more than a friend, because he DID ask you out in the hospital. But you have to decide whether YOU like HIM or not, because you said you'd only be doing it out of guilt. If you don't like him like that, then don't go out with him, because you'll only hurt him. But if you do like him, just find out if he really likes you. Ask his friends or ask him in a note. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

hi, i dont know if anyone remembers this but i wrote a little while back about a friend whos father had brain cancer, and he had a major surgery on the 1st day of school (september 2nd or so), the doctors werent sure if he would surive or not, my friend wasnt sure what to do. whether to go with his parents or go to school, because he hates to see his father in the hospital and all. so he came to me the night before. I told him no matter what he does his father will always love him and always be proud of him. he told me that i was scaring him like his father was, since right before i said that so did his father. I said i was sry and ill always support in anything. I know they went on vaca the week be4 so he got to spend time with him. then he had his 14th birthday in november. christmas and the new year. yeah well on monday my friend whos his gf said he wouldnt be in all week and she wouldnt say why and well last night my other friend asked me if i heard wat happened to him. i said no and that all i knew was that he wasnt gonna be in school all we, it turns out this pasted sunday his father had pasted :'-(. I dont know wat to do or how to support him, when he comes back to school next week. please help

Aw, that's so sad. What you need to do is either tell him or write in a note, that you'll ALWAYS be there for him if he wants to talk. People deal with this differently. Some want to talk about it and others don't. If he doesn't want to talk about it, just tell him that you're here and listening whenever he needs you. There's not much else you can do, you can't bring his father back. What would be really nice would be if you got him a nice card with a little note in it, because he'll know you care and that will make him feel better. Maybe get a big group of friends and make him a GIGANTIC card with little notes from everyone. That would sooo cute. Good luck to you and your friend.
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

ok well this is something that i have already told my mom, and she said that she gets that to sometimes, but there is nothing that she can say that will stop it... but i really think there is something i can do! ok so here is the problem: i know that you get a little bit of white stuff that comes out "down there" but i always get ALOT of white "gunk" down there, it is always al over my underwear, were i have to wipe it out, because it smells, and i also get this irritation almost irritated pain down there to! is there any thing that i can do to treat it? i dont think it is a yeast infection though... but any help...thanks in advance!

Ok, well everyone gets a little, but if you're having a lot, then there might be a problem, because if it smells, itches, or burns at all, it's definitely an infection. (not a yeast infection though, that's different). It might be embarrassing, but you have to see a gyno about it. They specialize in that stuff and see this all the time, so there's no reason to be embarrassed. What would help is to wear pantyliners, so it doesn't get on your underwear. Don't get the scented kind though, because some girls have reactions to scent. Also, thongs may irritate it too, so don't wear them anymore if you do. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

I have these two friends one doesnt like the other and the other wants to be the other ones friend what should I tell both of them?

Tell your friend that doesn't like the other girl that your other friend is really nice. You have to target why she doesn't like her in the 1st place and work from there. The other girl who wants to be friends, have her write a nice note to the other girl and have her do something really nice, like bake cookies for her (I know, cheesy, but who doesn't like cookies?). She'll probably be caught off guard at her kindness and be nice back to her. That's just the way it works. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

hey.. i'm getting all depressed because i have to move and transfer to a PRIVATE school and wear a really retarded uniform, but i have to ride the public kids school bus and i know right now theyr gunna make fun of me. i don't want to tell my parents how much it's bothering me because, first of all it isn't going to change anything, and it's like their "dream house" and everything. it's not just the bus part that bothers me though, i'm scared of moving because ive never moved before and i really don't want to leave my friends. please help xxox -jeanine

Well, I don't exactly know how you're feeling, because I've never moved, but I'll try to help. First off, how do you know they're going to make fun of you? I'm sure that's not gonna happen, but I guess if it does, just IGNORE THEM. Because they would just be trying to get a reaction. If you don't give them one, they'll think what's the point and back off. I seriously think you should talk to your parents about it. Even though it's not gonna change anything, maybe they've moved a few times when they were kids and can tell you about their experiences. Or if they didn't, they can still offer good advice. They're your parents, they've been through more crap than you have. So they could actually help you. Second, ya moving is really hard. I can't imagine having to leave my friends. I'm really shy and having to make new friends scares the crap out of me, lol. So I sort of know how you feel, having to leave your friends and all. You just have to keep in touch with them. IM them, email them, write letters, or talk on the phone. And if you don't live TOO far apart, you can maybe visit each other halfway every now and then. For making new friends, you just have to make conversation. I don't know about where you're going, but at my school, when there's a new kid, everyone introduces themselves and is really nice. But if no one says anything to you, you have to make the first move. Just go up to someone if you get lost, and ask where to go, and you'll probably make a friend there. At lunch, sit with people you know from your classes. And it might take time, but you'll eventually make new friends. I hope everything works out for you. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

Okay, here's my story... So, I had like a million friends at my old school, and had no problem having fun and kicking back during school and on weekends, but now I moved (for the 5th time), and it's been the hardest move for me, at first everyone was great and i made 'a' team basketball and even popular people were nice to me, but i made a major "mistake" apparently. And now one of the rudest popular people kind of turned her popular friends (the supposed nice ones) against me secretly behind my back, i used to sit by lunch with them and everything, so now i FINALLY found some other people to sit with at lunch, and a few friends to hang with, but i never hang out with them outside of school, and basketball is still going OKAY, but most of the popular people are on the team with me, and it seems like they ignore me, and i really want them to like me, it's just my life has become opposite of how it used to be, it went from fabulo to mediocre, and school isn't that fun anymore.. how can i become accepted and forgiven (i've already tried apologizing in a mature manner!!), i need help, sorry it was long, but can some caring person out there give me some good advice!!!!!????

p.s. and the weird thing is--especially at my old school--III was the one giving the advice!!

Ok, if you've tried apologizing and they're still bein gay about it, then just forget about them, cuz they're not worth your friendship. The friends you sit with at lunch now, try asking them to hang out. Like you all go see a movie together. The more you hang out, the more you'll get to know each other and everything. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

Well theirs this guy, we'll call him Trevor lol. I like Trevor and he likes me, we went out before but only for a day and Im not even sure if we were going out. We flirt and talk sometimes but not that much anymore because I dont see him a lot. Since I dont talk to him so much I was wondering if I wrote him a note what should I say? I really want to go out with him but I just dont know how to ask him in a "mature" way I guess lol so if anyone can answer this and give me advice it'd be awesome thx!

You could say that you've missed talking to him and you really want to hang out sometime. You don't want to ask him out in a note, cuz to me, that's kind of shady. Ask if he wants to hang out, and just kind of lead up to it. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

Okay this is a long story so here it goes. A few months ago, I recently developed feelings for one of my guy friends. One night, it was revealed to him. At first I couldn't believe he knew, but now I regret the whole thing. After I told him I liked him, things looked like they were going pretty good. Me and him began flirting more than usual and he would say things that made me believe we had a possible future together. The only problem with him is, he tends to flirt with a lot of girls which surprisingly I'm okay with but several weeks have gone by and he hasn't asked me out and now I just want to forget about him. Plus I don't think he's completely over his ex-girlfriend and friends of mine have been telling me who he's been flirting with heavily and the girl he flirts with, is a good friend of mine and she knew I liked him. I guess my question is, why would he tell me it's okay to like him and that he said he was going to ask me out soon if truly in the end, he only liked me as a friend.

He might just be afraid of losing your friendship. Talk to him about it, and see what he has to say. He might just like the attention you gave him when you told him you liked him. Ya, guys are like that. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

Guys like to say girls are difficult but guys can be just as difficult too. There's this guy who no matter how hard I try to not like him, he stays in my mind constantly. I know most would say move on but the truth is I can't. He's not dating anyone at the moment but he loves to flirt a lot. We've been friends for awhile and it didn't seem like him, but he played me. He promised my bestfriends that he wouldn't hurt me and also he let them know that he liked me a lot but he never came around to asking me out. Should I still wait for something to happen even though it's been months, or just force myself to move on?

Try flirting back, and if you're feeling brave, ask HIM out. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

I was wondering what the world would be like with out those loveable gorgoues fur balls called pets?

Haha, the world would suck. How can you live without a little kitten? Hehe.
♥ Erin

[view]

Theres this girl in my class , she's kinda my friend . not really though , i mean i talk to her but thats about it . she has a tendancy to "suck up" to all the popular pple and especially our seniors and stuff . the thing is , none of the popular pple and seniors get that shes sucking up to them . this gets on my nerves , and honestly , i have to say that i'm a little jealous of her . everyone is .she has so many friends . also shes lucky enough to get tickets for the next big concert ,which everyone wants to go to . i know shes going to use this to make herself more popular by inviting all the hot guys and uber popular girls and stuff . how do i get my friends and seniors to like ME more instead of her ? i know i'm being a jealous little bitch , but i can't help it . so don't go on and on about how bad i am . also , lots of girls in my class have bfs . is there a way to send guys signals you want them to be your bf without flirting too much ?? thanks , bye =)

You just have to talk to the right people. Start talking to them with this other girl. And talk to guys more, they'll notice you. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

i am a 13 year old girl, and i tried my boyfriend's ciggarette the other day, cuz i just wanted to try. he didnt force me into it, i just wanted to try ; like i just said. so then the next day i craved for one soo badly and i bit my nails which i never did before. and i just want some kinda smoke in mah lungs now ! am i addicted already ? what should i do ?

It sounds like you're addicted, but it just seems too early to me. I mean, it was only your first try. But no matter how strong you're craving is, don't try anymore. Ciggarettes are really bad for your health. 1/2 of my grandparents died cuz of it. So don't smoke okay? Just like, try chewing gum or something. Or start eating more chocolate. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]

now im not blowin my own trumpet or anything, but im a pretty good singer. recently i entered this singing competition, but im getting really neervous about the first heat. i hardly ever sing in front of people (except at my singing lessons) and im getting really nervous - its on the 24th of jan and i dont even know what song im going to sing! can anybody help with calming down about this, coz im really scared im going to do REALLY badly on the day!

When you're up there singing, you just have to pretend like no one there. Or pretend like it's your family or your singing instructor. Also, it would to have some friends there for support. If you see them in the audience or whatever, you'll smile and feel less nervous. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

[view]