about

Hmm.. What kind of advice can I give?
Any kind you'd like. Advice on relationships (all types) Getting out of trouble(my specialty) Sarcasim is always fun.
Giving advice is something I do best, I'll awnser any question you'd like, unless they're stupid and extremely pointless ones.
About me?- I like playing basketball, I'm still in Highschool, doing things that will get me in trouble, but always being good enough to get out of it.
My friends mean the world to me, without them I don't know what'd I do.
I could go on, but I don't think I will.

Anyways, if you do ask me questions, try to hold back on tYpInG lyK diZ N sTuFf alright. Other than that Anything you want to know I'll do my best to help with :)

advice

Hi, I'm trying to get rid of my my unsociable, indifferent, freshman reputation, and hopefully make some close friends this upcoming year. I would like to know some ways I might be able to change people's perception of me. I guess I come off as withdrawn and slightly angry, so this may come off as a difficult question for those of you "popular people", who are able to make friends easily. My main purpose is to make friends in order actually look forward to going to school in the morning... For your information, I am 15 and male.

By wanting to change and make closer friends is already a start in making new friends. It only takes one friend to open a gate to more. Not everyone is going to change their views about you. But if you put yourself out there, most will. Just finding one close friend is all you really need. Next year just put yourself out to people who you wouldn't mind becoming friends with and it will definatly help you and eventually your reputation will change, which will lead to more friends.

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i know this is kinda stupid but how do i get closer friends ?? i want friends who i can trust and talk to and hang out like every day its just when i get friends they kick me to the curb i HAD these amazing friend((emma n iris)) and we hung out EVERY SiNLE DAY and i said lets never get into a fight i was us to be best friends forever and we did that secret box thing from crossroads((gay yeah i know rite lol)) well emma n iris one day hung out with this girl marissa and they became like BEST FRIENDS and i was just being left out and it happen like that i did not see it coming and then they started making fun of me and saying mean stuff to me and i said i wanted my stuff back from that secret box thing if your gonna keep doing this to me and they said that they through it out and i put my most favorite stuff in there...We are friends now but not that tight...how do i get REAL BEST friends? i will rate high for extremly good anweres

Friends like that aren't easy to find. It's all about who you choose out, and it doesn't happen that quickly at all. I've had a lot of friends who in the end, things didn't work out. People like Emma and Iris come along a lot more often than a true friend. Find someone that you TRUST first, and then don't be afraid to tell them things. If you really can see yourself having a long friendship with someone than don't be afraid to make the first step towards that. You WILL find close friends, it just may take some time.

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Okay so i go to a small high school i'll be a senior, and i hang out with this group of people and i mean we're all really close, and it's really weird cause theres i'd say about.. 50-60 of us, but we all hang out at school at lunch together and take up this big spot and everything. Anyways there's guys and girls. I really want to have a birthday party this year i'll be turning 17. because i didn't do anything for my 16th really and i haven't ad one since like 6th grade. but i was just wondering if anyone had any ideas on what to do with so many people. my friend had her 16th bday at this big hotel room thing..like whats downstairs..and there was a dance floor and a dj and food and stuff. so i dont really want that. i would just feel bad if i didn't invite some people cause we're all like best friends..and thats what makes it hard. 50 best friends? whaatt.. i mean i have ONE BEST BEST friends, but everyone else is pretty much the same. any ideas?
oh and my bdays in november.

Oh gosh. I totally know how you feel. I have a huge group of friends, like a million. It's usually a weird situaton to be put in because I go to a pretty big sized high school and the people I hang out with all go to different high schools but for the most part we hang out together. If I do something and can't have that many people over it upsets the others. If you want to do something then go out to eat for you dinner or something. Afterwards if you like to drink or whatever it is you do with your friends, try to do that. It's never easy and in the end if you can't have as many people then I wouldn't know what to do. Ask your parents about it. If your birthday is in November than you have quite a bit of "convincing" so you may be able to throw something at your house.

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what do you do when all your bestfriend does when you's hang out is make out iwht her boyfriend and you cant tell her anything cause you dont want her to get mad cause you's are such a great friends and you dont want to ruin her and her boyfriends relationship

Ahh I know exactly what you're going through. I've been through it a few times. It drives me nuts. It's your best friend though, tell her exactly how you feel about it and she should respect it enough not to do it so much in front of you. Hang out with her without her boyfriend. Sometimes girls get too wrapped up in the one they're with they forget about how their friends might feel about it. It's aggrivating as hell but if you don't say something then it won't stop. Just approach it in a calm manner so to speak. Just tell her you'd like to hang out with her. Not watch her make out with her boyfriend all the time.

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ok well me and one of my best friend got into our 2nd fight ...and we made a promise to eachother that we wouldn't fight for something stupid(our golden promise), and it happend, she asked me to be her friend and i said no, and i have no clue why, i really wanted to be her friend, but i just didn't wanna seem easy to jus let it go, cuz i've done that b4 and my other friend took advantage of me, and kept doing it and then i finally stuck up for myself, and i dont know wat to do w/ this friend, i mean i love her so much and we have been friends so long, and i wanna talk to her and become friends with her again, but ...i don't know wat to do should i just i-m her and ask her to be friends? and uhmm, wat if she says no? wat do i do? i'm gonna feel like an idiot=( please help
Love,
?some1?

Definatly say something to her. An IM is so much easier than in person, so I'd definatly go about it that way. Just tell her exactly how you feel. If she went to you the first time asking you to be friends, I'm sure she'll be willing again. Tell her everything of what you feel about your friendship with her, and why you were the way you were. And just apologize and ask for another chance. A fight isn't worth losing a best friend over.

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I have this firend of mine whom i've known since grade school. We are now 22 years old. When we were about 16 years old he told me that his sister had a baby and that he was left to take care of it. I found it strange because the baby was not his responsibility. He then told me that his sister took the baby to live across town.

We got out of touch with each other since high school. And met up again in College. It was a year or so when he decided to confide in me and tell me that he had a son when he was 17. He then told me that his son died due to medical reasons. I was his shoulder to lean on.

Recently i met another old high school freind of mine who said that she sees him all the time and he showed her pictures oh his son. I told her that i knew all about his son and i was sorry about what happened. She looked at me with questioning eyes and asked what happened to his son. I told her that his son died. She laughed and said no his so is not dead. She told me that the last time she saw him he told her that he had to buy some books for his son because he is starting school.

I was shocked. I could not belive it. I knew she was not lying she had no reason to lie. And it sounds like his son is no longer a baby. A baby does not need books. It sounds more like a first grader. As if the child was 7 years old. It was seven years ago when we were 16 and he had to take care of his sister's baby.

Could it be that my friend is a cold blooded liar? And if so why does he feel the need to lie to me. The person who was there for him through his so call suffering. And why would he tell me htat his son is dead when the opposite is true?

Woah, that's definatly a werid situation, and a disturbing one. I really don't know what would trigger people to lie about such a thing. One, he might not want you to be ashamed of him, and therefore put in some sympathy line to possibly make you not be so upset about him lying all those years. Another reason MAYBE, is that he feels he lacks attention and needed someone to listen to him complain, so he could feel loved and not alone. Other than that I can't think of any reasons why someone would make up such a horrid lie like that. If I were you, I'd confront him, try not to make it too confrentational, and then go on with my life without him. If he's going to lie about something like that, who knows what other lies he could make up.

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My friends popular friends don't like me much, so they told her I said I didn't like her. She believed it and now won't talk to me and I was supposed to go to a dance tonight but now am all depressed in my room. Also she's my one and only best friend. What should I do?

One, that doesn't sound like a best friend if she's taking the "popular" girls sides over her best. You should just tell her how it is, if she can't accpet that, then it'd be her loss. I mean I know if ya'll were to not become friends that'd be a hard thing to do. But there's ALWAYS people out there who would be willing to be your friend. You can do better if she refuses to even listen to what you have to say. I really hope ya'll work things out, good luck!!

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My daughter does not want to know me and is trying to exclude me from the rest of the family i am heartbroken she cant see that i love her and my other children she is married and has children of her own please find me some answers as to why this is happening

If that's the case then she's probably dealing with some old resentment issues. I don't know your family situation, but maybe she's still having issues to things that might of gone on when she was younger between the two of ya'll. The only way anything will ever get solved is if you step up, and let her know that you want to be apart of her life, and you want to know why she's trying exclude you from her's. It might start a fight, but sometimes things have to get worse before they can start to get better. You'll know how to handle it much better if you confront her, and you actually know the reason for her acting the way she does.

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well im in basketball...And im like not too good whats a way to help me not think about bein nervous...or somethin...plz help me out !!

Of course the thing to do would be practice. But it's more than that, you really gotta learn to love the sport, I've played since I was 4, and basketball is probably one of the best sports out there. Learn to appriciate the game, if you're really determined practice EVERY chance you have spare time. When you're out on the court you NEED to feel confident, not OVER confident, but confident enough to where you lose some of the nervous feelings. They'll go away soon enough, you just gotta practice at the game. If you want it bad enough, you'll get better. Practicing will gain you confidence. And if you miss a few shots, or get frustrated, try not to let it discourage you, it happens to the best of players. Also, try taking some summer camps, or winter camps for ball handling skills. Depending on where you live, a good one for the summer would be the Don Eddy basketball camp. I hope you stick w/ it, basketball is A GREAT sport.. good luck

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I am having my 17th birthday party on friday and the theme is pink. I invited guys and they don't care that the theme is pink lol. But this is my first party where guys can come and I am worried something bad will go wrong or that my mom will stay downstairs or something. And what are some games we can play or things we can do that will be fun for both guys and girls? thanks and any other ideas will be great thanks

Yes board games would be good, you might want to talk it out with your mom before hand if you don't want her watching your every move. Another cool thing might be to make like a slide show of pictures with all of your friends, you know, things that'll bring back some good memories. Music of course is always good, and lots and lots of junk food. Also, movies is a no-brainer and let the party flow from wherever it takes you. Make sure the parent's aren't around and try to get it started immediatly. Have the music playing when the first people walk in. It should be a success! I hope it goes aLright for you, happy birthday!

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Ok, before I get to my problem I'm going to kind of explain the situation so you get it. So at my high school we have to share lockers with one person because there’s like 2700 people and there are not enough lockers. I am on the cheer team and so is my locker partner, I’ll call her Sarah. And there is this other girl that is on the cheer team, we’ll call her Molly, her locker is upstairs and all her classes are downstairs, so she started keeping her stuff in our locker. Now I don’t have a problem with her being there but were not the best of friends. Anyways, I got a bunch of pictures of hott guys in magazines from my house and put them in the locker. Sarah and Molly really liked this one picture of Chad Michael Murray.

Ok so at cheer practice this other girl comes up to me, I’ll call her Kelly, and she asks me what my locker com was. I asked her why and she said because Sarah and Molly hid your poster of Chad and they’re gonna take it. I said ok well I'm not going to give it to you so tell me where it is. And they said they would just go with me. So I go to my locker and sure enough, the posters gone. So we start going through everything to try and find it. We found it taped underneath one of the shelves. So I just took all the posters out and threw them away so then they can’t have any of them. Then Kelly starts going through this whole explanation. She said, Molly came up to me today and was like were gonna take Kylies poster of Chad. And Kelly said she asked her why and Molly said because she wanted it. My problem with her story is that why would they take the poster if they can see it every day in the locker?

So, after cheer practice I went up to Molly and I asked her why she wanted my poster so bad that she thought she needed to steal it. She said what the heck and was telling me that it wasn’t even her that was trying to steal it. She said that Kelly was with her at the locker while she was getting stuff out and Kelly was like can I have that poster and she told her no so Kelly tried to grab it but Molly closed the locker. Molly said Sarah told Kelly our locker com and she had it in her planner. So she said that’s why they hid it so that if Kelly tried to take it she couldn’t find it. Now my problem with this story is that if Kelly had the com already then why would she come to me and ask for it?

I know that I sound like a complete idiot getting all worked up over a stupid poster that I got out of a magazine but its not about the poster it’s the fact that they were gonna take it without asking me. Like really if they had just asked I would have given it to them because I really don’t care. But they didn’t so I'm mad.

So you see I'm kind of getting the same story from both people but the names are just changed. I really can’t base it on who I trust more because Molly tends to be very fake (like I’ve seen her go up to someone and be like oh hey I love your shirt and then she’ll turn around and be like what the heck is she wearing???) and I've caught Kelly in a lie before. My question to anyone who decides to read this whole thing (I'm really sorry it’s so long) is who should I believe??

It wouldn't matter. The point is that they both kknew about it and did nothing to stop it, on both sides. Nor did they even bother to tell you for that matter. What you should do is simply tell them the next time something of her's is missing that they'll have to find another locker to put their stuff in. Of course they'll still have your combo which could be bad, but if they can't put their stuff in there, then that should leave them with a small delimma. Ohh well if you have to continue to share lockers with Kelly, then you both should just kick "Molly" out if something like that happens again. IF by chance something gets taken from your locker again, then I would start to suspect your friend Kelly. Either way they both have no right to take your stuff, and you should tell them that you don't want it to happen again or Someone's getting kiked out. That someone being Molly. K, I hope this made sense, It was kinda difficult for me to type it than it was to think it up in my head.

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My friends and I have been in this fight for like a long time. And we havn't really gotton over it. And its not just any kind of group. Its the popular group and we ALL know how that is. There are rumors flying everywhere and I want to be nice to them because most of them arn't really mad at me. Only if I hang out with my friend who 'was' in that group. I have done everything! Anyone have any suggestions without being rude to any of my friends? Or is it just totally HOPELESS
?

Ah, that's the worst. Really, there's nothing you can do. I feel sooo hopeless when things like that happen. The only thing you can do is tell your friends who are "in' the group so to speak, that you're going to be friends with everyone. Eventually it'll blow over, once the rumors stop and everyone calms down over it. Just TRY to not get in the middle, and if you're already it in, I'm really sorry. The only thing you can do is talk it out. That's it. And that's horrible advice I know because that would be the obvious choice, but what more coudl you do? You could try to get them to "meet" up accidently, but that might end up getting them pissed off @ you. Which wouldn't be any good. YOU just keep being friends with everyone, don't get trapped in the "If you're friends with her, we're not friends anymore," game. Good luck, I hope it blows over soon.

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oh gosh i dont konw what to say now.....
ok my friend and i like a same guy he is so fine and all but he can not decided that who does he want to date and all should i quit between him and my best friend? i think i should give up on him and contiuned the friendship between me and my friend so help me out guys

I went through the exact same thing. It won't do anything but bring hardships when something like that happens. As much as you want the guy, you can't forget that this person is your BEST FRIEND. It does nothing but bring hardships on a freindship. It took me until AFTER it was all over that it totally wasn't worth losing a friend, a good one at that. Yeah I got the guy, but it didn't feel good at all, it actually made me stop liking him. When things like that happen it just brings trouble. If I were you, I'd surrender, no matter how hard it is. Keeping your best friend will be far more worth it in the end.

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Well here's the thing, my best friend(23) has just recently gotten engaged. She has asked me(19) to be her maid of honor and I have said yes. But come to find out she has been lying to this guy(20) the whole time they've been together. I didn't realize what she's been doing until all of us started to hang out with each other. He's really nice and really loves her. But I don't believe she feels the same about him. She is what you would call a user. If you have something that she could benefit from she attaches to you and try's to get you for all you have. She has cancer and is getting a divorce from her present husband now, there goes her medical, this new guy is in the airforce and is form a family with money, (lots of benefits and can take care of her). My question is, should I tell him about all of her lies, cheating and sneaky ways or just leave the whole thing alone and let him find out for himself.

Woah, what a best friend. It doesn't sound to me like she's much of a friend if she does that kind of stuff. The thing to do would first talk to your Best Friend, and lether knowthat she needs to come clean with him, and if she doesn't, then you will. I mean, if it's your best friend you probably wouldn't want to lose her as one right? Well telling him without her knowing will do the trick. Try to get her to tell him first, he'd MUCH rather here it from her probably, instead of another person.

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I need help. Ive just recently started dated a guy i really like. My friend was really excited for me when she found out. But then both of them got into a big fight and now they hate each others guts. They always get into big fights. One time he called my friend bad names to her face. I stood up for her tho. cuz the reason why he cursed her out wasnt a good reason. But since he cursed her out shes been getting mad at me lately. She thinks that im putting him before our friendship. But im not. I value our friendship more than ever. She thinks i should break up w/ him because of the way hes been treating her. But i dont want to break up w/ him because he is sooo sweet to me. I feel like i can talk to him about anything. Plus he hasnt done anything to me. I know it wasnt right of him to call my friend bad names and i stood up for her even. but i guess thats not enough for her. My other friend told me that im putting him infront of my friendship w/ my friend since hes my first bf. Everybody is getting mad at me just bc im going out w/ him. Today my friend told me that i was hurting her by going out w/ him. She keeps rubbing things in my face and shes making it seem like im a horrible friend. and it hurts because i dont want to be. I dont think i did anything wrong. She told me that i should put friends first. And i do put friends first. i stood up for her did i not? i dont know what to do...i really need ur advice!! because i like this guy alot and he doesnt treat me bad or anything but my friend hates him. and sooner or later i might have to choose between them. but i dont want that to happen. please help!!!!!

You're probably not a bad friend, and she might be over-reacting just a tad bit. But don't forget, your guys gotta be able to hang with your girls.. It's too hard to make both people happy if they absolutly hate each other. I'm not saying you should give up a self sacrifice just to make your friend happy, if you really like this guy, then be with him. Tell your friend to back down a little bit, but get onto your boyfriend and let him know that that's your FRIEND who SHOULD come first... Tell your boyfriend about how hard it is to function and keep both relationships when they're both fighting... and tell him that your friendship with the girl is really important to you. And if he's kind and understanding, he'll change is ways and try to settle their differences

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okay... I'm a fourteen year-old female in my freshman year of high school. I'm also an advicenator, but I suck at giving good rational advice to myself. Now here's the problem: I have trouble talking on the phone, even with friends, but especially with guys I like. I have lots of self confidence and I'm really talkative online and in person... but the phone? I will admit that since I've moved I've become more shy, but I've always had this phone issue. I know that often in conversations I use things around me and improvise... so it's harder on the phone. What should I talk about? Why am I *nervous*? Any advice at all would be much appreciated because I have no clue how to not to be like this and I know this guy is going to call my sometime... I'll rate or comment if you want... thanks!

I go through the EXACT SAME THING. I'm not really as nervous talking on the fone to my friends, but when I'm talking to a guy I like, I get so nervous that there's going to be one of those akward "silent moments" that there ends up being a bunch. On the computer and in person it's no big deal to me what-so-ever. I think it's just becuase you're talking to someone you really like, you don't want to say something stupid. You might not ever get over your fear of talking on the phone with someone you like, I probably won't either. But overtime it gets better, and pray that he's a conversationist. Thinking of things to talk about like a good subject that you could go talking about forever is good. Also, try not to be distracted by other things, it makes it completly harder. and don't forget that most of the time he's probably feeling the same way.

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ok i have this friend lets call her cassy..shes like my bestfriend now..but when i met her i hated her cuz she always trien to steal my bestfriend at the time..and now that i hanged with her alot i think shes pretty cool..and we do alot together..well the other girl my old bestfriend (Hannah) always seems like to compete against me to get to her..and when ever me n cassy hang out she gets like jelous..i really just dont kno wut to do ne more..i mean i feel bad for cassy..wut do u guys and girls think i should do? thanks so much!

You should bring it forth that you feel liek you're competing against her for Cassy's friendship. The only way to solve it, is to make it clear that you realize that this is going on. Tell her that you don't want it to be a battle for her friendship. It might cause a big ol' fight but things like that alwyas end up being solved, just with time. It's the only way anything wil happen.

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I'm at a new school where i dont know many people... i made this one friend, lets just call her anna. So anna and i have been hanging out on the weekends and stuff for the past 3 weeks and im starting to realize that she is really conceited. I don't want to have a friend like this, but i don't really have any other options because i don't want to be friendless. I don't know if you can help very much, just give me your thoughts on this, or maybe if you can relate we can talk about your experience. thanks.

That definatly sucks when something like that happens. The best thing you can do is try to talk to new people, maybe start talking to some people she hangs out with more than her. It would be better to have no friends than have one who makes you miserable when you're around. Don't be afraid to talk to new people, they'll come around soon enough,if you're willing to go talk to them.

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I'm worried about my friend- she isn't saying much anymore- like usually she'll talk all the time, but now she'll occasionally say "yeah" "okay" "maybe" "i dunno" she like doesn't say anything else besides that. I asked her if sumthin was botherin' her but she said no. I hope she isn't hiding something from me. What do u think is up?

-signed- a worried friend

Maybe she's just frustrated, I know you want to help but in those situations it usually MIGHT annoy them, if they don't want to tell about what's going on.The best thign you can do, is let her know that you're there for her and all she has to do is ask. I'd leave it at that or it might turn into something you don't wnat to happen.

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Hello. My name's Amanda and I'm 15 and from New York. I've loved the spotlight since I was a very little girl and I can't think of a time when I wasn't entertaining someone. My main interests are dancing and acting but I also do a lot of singing and modeling too. I remember being a little girl and singing and dancing around the house and I'm always getting complimented on my acting and modeling skills, haha. Of course I don't want to sound like I'm bragging but it's just the truth and I want you to know the truth before you go and give me advice. Anyways, I've been taking dance classes since I was about 5 or so and when I was in 3rd grade I started singing in a children's choir along with getting vocal training. I sung in the choir untill I was 13 and now I've moved on to other things. I'm searching for an agent right now and I've begun taking acting classes. The reason I'm writing here is because I need advice on my parents. They don't seem to support me as much as they used to. I mean, they're awesome parents but they think I should be more focused on becoming a lawyer or doctor(which I have no interest in) then becoming an entertainer or someone in the entertainment industry. I don't understand why they're acting so cold lately towards my dreams. I know that it takes a lot of work to become something but I'm willing to work hard for it and I just wished they had my back. Also, my friends seem to think that my vocal and acting training and stuff is silly and they don't see why I go on auditions and stuff. It really hurts when they mock me for what I do...I know they don't mean to hurt me but I don't like it at all. Most of my friends are really big jocks and so am I but I'm a very verstile(sp?) person and I like other things too and they can't seem to understand that. Anyone have any advice? I'd love someone to talk with about this! Thanks for reading, Amanda

Well one, it's awesome that you're willing to work for your dream, don't give up. As for your parents, when they come up with something like that you simply should tell them that you don't want to live out their dream, you want one of your own, and being in the spotlight is it. Same with your friends, if they don't agree with your choice then you should just tell them they need to be a little more understanding and you want their support more than anything. You're always going to have people who try to let you down cause they don't think you can make it, your best solution- prove them wrong. Don't let anyone get in the way of doing what you love. I wish you the best of luck, and hope you can make it to the top, don't let anyone stop you.

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