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18/F
Hi. I have a problem with guys. They just don't want to seem to date me or even hang out with me. I have never had a boyfriend, a kiss, a hug, or even held hands with a guy that I am not related to. I am now a freshman in college. I have been told I am cute/pretty/hott, I have a good figure, and my personality is great. (I hate saying this, even on here, because I'm not comfortable taking compliments or even sharing them, even with anonymous strangers.) I have made a great group of friends here at college which is new for me too. I have never had such a great group of friends who actually care about me like they do. I just don't understand why guys don't want to date me. Is there anything I can do to catch a guy's attention? You might want to know that I am rather shy and dress kind of conservatively (but I'm not afraid to show a little clevage). Can anybody help me please understand why I haven't had a boyfriend even though people keep telling me I'm so great??
Thanks in advance!! :D (link)
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Well I'm sure there are guys that would want to date you. If you start to get interested in a guy then try to find some way to talk to them and be cool with them and maybe become friends. Usually, when you're friends with a guy and you guys are into each other, a relationship would be better. Don't change who you are for any guy though. Pretty much, be yourself and show guys that you are worth their time. Don't stress about it too much. Good luck!
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We broke up earlier so he can get back on track with his life/career. He thought a relationship was a distraction. His family doesn't like me, so when they found out we broke up. They were happy. They thought I was a bad influence on him, because for some reason he would do stuff for me and not for them. I guess... They're intimidated by me? By the power I have towards their son? But anyways, he recently told me that he still loves me because ever since we broke up he couldn't stop thinking about me. We decided to be in a "secret" relationship, but towards his parents he's single?? So we're keeping it away from his parents, and we're limiting the time we see each other. Then, just now... I told him I was scared he was going to leave me again, he said he's trying really hard to regain his feelings back towards me. What? Who tries to regain their feelings back for someone? Does that even work? I know he needs time to get everything organized.
My friends say that he's obviously confused about his life, but he obviously still really likes me because I'm his first personal girlfriend that he actually loved. And he didn't want to lose that, especially since he keeps calling me nicknames and hugs me, kisses me, holds my hand in front of other people.
But the one thing that confuses me, regaining his feelings? He said, yes he still loves me, that's why he said he was going to come back to me. Uhhhh... (link)
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He's obviously confused. I think he still does care about you and like you. Just give him time and hopefully he'll figure out what he wants. It'd be tough on the guy if his parents didn't approve of his girlfriend. So that weight is also on him.
I think the whole regaining his feelings would confuse me as well. He said he still loves you but he's probably just confused about what he wants and what he needs. Well, just give him some time to figure everything out and don't bug him about it. If he wants to be with you, then he will.
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so my boyfriend and i have been going out for about three months and on friday he tells me that he's going out with friends for the weekend so he thinks something is gonna happen( meaning he might mess around with another chick) and he says if anything happens he will be honest with me about it so i'm like wtf is he being honest saying he cares or is he just taking me for granted
please help (link)
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Wow..he kinda sounds like a jerk. He's telling you he might cheat on you ahead of time. I think he is being honest, but the honesty is about him telling you he's gonna be with you but hook up with other people. I don't think you'd want a guy like that. Find someone better. Good luck!
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Hi, Ive broken up with my boyfriend recently (about 2 months ago) and im having a really hard time dealing with it. He has a drinking problem and is not very "trustworthy" when it comes to faithfulness. Of course he's begged for second (and third) chances, all which ive given to him, and now he wants another one. Im being firm by saying no, and now he is turning it around on me saying he's "tried" and thats it. All he ever wants to do is "SAY" he's sorry. He never wants to "DO" anything to show me. He said nothing he ever says is good enough for me. Please help :( (link)
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You've already given him chances. Yes, forgive him. But don't take this guy back. You've already made your decision and if he is not trustworthy, he's not trustworthy. You already answered your question. Don't deal with him anymore, you deserve way better. You know when it's time to let go. :)
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ive been cheated on and lied to and promised it wouldnt happen and i dont know if it is happening, i dont know what to do. i just want things to work after 3years. i feel like if he wanted to be single and do his own thing he has the option and yet it seems like he stays and doesnt tell me everything and i don't how to trust and let go. i really want to, i want to try but its hard. (link)
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You need to sit down and talk to this guy. If you tell him that you want all this to stop and he does, then it is all good. If he doesn't, you need to let him go. You deserve soo much better than that. Everybody does. Find yourself someone better who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Good luck!
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I've known this kid since 5th grade and i used to have a huge crush on him. But now we're in 11th grade and we actually hang out, he lives a few blocks away and he walks to meet me all the time. I slept at my friends house one night and slept in his arms, I always sit on his lap even though theres an open seat next to us, and sometimes we'll hold hands across intersections (like we're 5 years old, but its cute :) lol) The night i fell asleep in his arms, we talked for 6 1/2 hours straight about anything, and we weren't even bored. Our conversations were always interesting, and we dont even have to be kissing or anything, we can just hang out, cause we havent even kissed yet.
He recently told one of my good friends that he likes me, and he wanted him to ask me if i liked him too. I do, kind of. But the only thing holding me back is one of my really good friends. She's dated him on and off for a few years and they finally officially broke up a month or two ago. She's really broken up about it and still really likes him, but he couldn't care less, cause that's just how he is (and i understand that cause im similar to him in that way). I feel really bad that he likes me, and i kinda like him back, because of my good friend. I dont want to hurt her feelings cause she's always sooo nice. But that's what he didnt like about her. She was too nice. I don't know what to do. I'm starting to really like him, and get over my ex boyfriend, but i just dont want to hurt my friend.
does anyone know what i should do? (link)
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I totally agree with the person below. You should talk to your friend about this. Make sure she is totally ok about the two of you. If she's not then what do you care about more? Friendship or this guy? I'm hoping you're friends but it is your choice. But think about it for a good while that what you are choosing to do is for the best. You don't want to lose a friend over a guy do you?
I would just talk to her and see how that goes. Good luck!
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Okay so I know that whole "it's only awkward if you make it awkward" phrase will probably apply here, but anyhow: I have a crush on a guy in my class. I'm 99% sure that he likes me back (he constantly stares at me and does all that body language stuff). But the problem here is that I never really get a chance to talk to him. I say little more than "hi" to him everyday, somethings a few sentences if I'm lucky. But online I've talked to him for hours. I'm afraid that I'm getting into the bad habit of not talking to him in person and that it might become awkward? We're going to the same party next week and I want to know how to talk to him without being all weird. He always makes me feel nervous at first, but when we start talking it becomes easier. Any tips would help. Also, what should I wear? It's not really formal but I want to look cute :). Thanks! (link)
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Well I used to be the same way with the guys I liked. But you've already talked to him alot online so he's probably also wondering why you guys don't talk so much in person. So you guys should and I'm pretty sure you both want to. So this is probably obvious, but it did work for me. I tried talking to him like he was one of my friends, not the guy that I have a huge crush on. So try that. Since you guys are going to the same party it's an even better chance to talk to him. So before this party comes around talk to him a little bit more during the week so it wouldn't be ask awkward as it could be. Don't stress about it or worry about it too much because it will show through and make you even more nervous. It's ok if awkward moments come around, just act cool about it.
And about what to wear, just wear something that you think is really cute and you feel completely comfortable in. If you feel pretty, you'll feel more confident in talking to him.
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I think I may have blown things with this guy. We dated for about 3 months and he lives in a different town anywhere from 20 to 30 minutes away, depending on traffic. It made it difficult to have a relationship since we couldn’t see each other, so I ended up breaking up with him. He had broken up with me once before, but only for like 3 days; he ended up driving his broken-ass car to come get me because he wanted me back. After that, the stress on our relationship continued anyway. He never really talked to me. I’m not clingy or possessive, so I’d never bother him like a crazy bitch, but it secretly drove me crazy that I’d go several days without hearing from him. Him not talking to me on a regular basis is why I ultimately decided to break up with him. I made several attempts to ask why, and what I could do to fix whatever I was doing “wrong”. It never went anywhere. After I broke up with him, I told him I still wanted to keep in touch so that maybe later on things would work out between us. I have insanely strong feelings for him. I’ve known him for about 3 years now, and I’ve always liked him and he’s always liked me too. So now that we’ve dated, my feelings have sky-rocketed pretty much. We’ve continued to talk, but I ended up wanting him back, and I told him a few days ago that I did. I did the whole throw-yourself-out-there technique that most movies portray, and it totally DID NOT work. All it did was push him away, and I even think it made me look a little “psycho”, if you know what I mean by that. I just wanted to tell him exactly how I felt in hopes that he’d be absolutely honest with me about what he thought about it. He said “you’re so dramatic”. It was just my way of revealing myself completely, and opening up because I’ve never felt like this about a guy and I’m so afraid of losing it. I feel like I’ll never find this feeling again. My past relationships have been so bad I’m trying to protect myself from things repeating. Maybe that’s a factor in the way I’ve been acting. So I waited a day or two after that to give him a break from me, and I apologized. I was totally genuine in what I said, I really meant it. I said “Can we start over? I’m really sorry for forcing my past experiences onto you. The way I’ve been acting lately isn’t like me at all, I just want a fresh new start” and he said “Let me think about it”. So I’m not going to talk to him at all. I don’t want to do anything to ruin my chances; I’m giving him all the space he needs to think about it and wait until, or IF, he talks to me. I wish he’d just tell me what’s going on in his head instead of one-word, or one-sentence answers; I hate that.
But be honest, from the information I’ve given have I blown it? Is he at least thinking about me, or considering my apology to some extent? I’m open in fixing in myself whatever need be fixed. I won’t change myself, but I want to better myself. If there’s anything I can do to change for the better and lose old baggage from past relationships so things can work with him, I’ll do it. No hesitation. I’m even okay with just being friends for now. I did say “start over” and I mean just that.
The suspense is driving me insane, please ease my suffering if you can.
(link)
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There are several different things you can do here. It's all your choice though. I've had this kind of problem with a guy before too, I gave him space but it never went anywhere. I decided to not text him or anything and let him text me when he was ready. I felt really pathetic cause I felt like I was waiting around for him. Really bad idea. Don't do that because if he doesn't come around, then you just feel really down and like you wasted your time on nothing.
My own personal opinion is to move on from this guy. Which I know will be really hard but I'm pretty sure you can do it.
You can message him if you want but if you're already feeling like you're pushing him away, you don't want to do it more right? You might just feel upset after you do it if he doesn't respond the way you want him to.
I honestly don't think you have blown it completely. You don't sound obsessive or anything. I'm pretty sure he thinks about you and could be considering your apology. I don't know the guy so I wouldn't know what's up with him.
So my advice is move on or at least don't wait around for him. You already told him that you want to start over. You did your part, you said your apology. It's his turn now. So whatever happens should be for the best. I doubt he will be the only guy you'd have strong feelings for. Don't worry about that.
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My boyfriend is a good guy, but he does a lot of stuff that I'm really not okay with. I've tried talking to him about it, but the thing is, he honestly doesn't see any of it as a big deal. He thinks I'm overreacting.
First, we hadn't been dating very long when a guy he was friends with made a joke about him having an STD (my boyfriend has slept with a lot of women). My boyfriend got upset, said that he may have acted like he was joking but he really wasn't, and said he didn't want me to talk to him anymore because it would cause problems (he doesn't have an STD, we got tested). So, I stopped talking to this guy. My boyfriend works with a girl who used to be my best friend, but went around saying I was a whore and I cheated on my ex with two different guys (totally not true). Naturally, I was mad and we don't talk anymore, but my boyfriend talks to her all the time at work. He says it's because they work together and he doesn't want her going to the HR department all the time, which I understand, but it's not like they're required to talk at their job, and if there were just talking about work it might be okay, but he's told me some of the things they talk about and it's like they're old friends or something.
Second, he has this gorgeous ex girlfriend. He talks about her a lot, always says how perfect she is. He said they broke up because he didn't feel good enough for her and never really felt comfortable around her, but they were really good friends before they dated, so they stayed friends. I have no problems with them being friends, but he's ALWAYS talking about how perfect she is. He tells her he loves her and he misses her and she's so amazing, and he never says those things to me. I guess I'm just jealous, but it hurts to hear him say those things to her when he won't say them to me, his girlfriend. He's always there for her when she needs him, but it's like anytime I try to talk to him about stuff that's bothering me, he acts like it's no big deal and I'm overreacting. He tells me he doesn't want to be with her, but I just can't help but get upset over it.
Sorry for ranting, but I'm really confused. If I'm overreacting, please tell me, because I really don't know. (link)
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I don't think you're overreacting. I mean maybe the girl at work wasn't too bad, but I wouldn't be happy either. I definitely wouldn't be happy with him talking to his ex girlfriend like that. If he won't even say those things to you and keeps telling her all this stuff, then he isn't worth it. I'd break up with him, if not, at least talk to him. If he just doesn't listen, then it really is not worth it. You deserve a guy who would tell YOU how wonderful and amazing you are and be there for you when you need him. Dump this guy and show him what he's missing. You deserve soo much better.
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You can love in a lot of ways. you can be with someone so amazing and say you love them; the next, and scariest step, if youre serious enough, can be saying youre in love with them.
(lets make sure we know the difference between loving someone & being in love with someone. i always believed you can only be in love so many times.)
For example, my story.. i met this guy in the beginning of sophomore year. we began to talk but we didnt get close until early 2010. we were best friends for months & then he admitted to liking me. I began to like him back and weve been together officially for nearly two months.
when someone's your best friend, is it faster to fall in love? how do you know? what's the differnece between loving someone & being in love with them?
i know they say youll know when you know. but maybe there are some little factors that everybody catches on.
thank you!
(link)
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You'll know when you're in love. You can love pretty much anyone. Like how you love your family, friends, ect. So pretty much you care about them.
Being in love is different. You know that. My opinion it would be loving them no matter what, like unconditionally, can't picture life without them, would do anything for them.
I'm not sure if it is faster to fall in love when you were best friends before. I guess it depends on who you are. Honestly, you should be friends with someone before dating them so you know what you are getting yourself into beforehand.
It really is difficult to define. But you just want only them and would care for them through it all, would respect them, and love them. Love isn't just a feeling, its an action too.
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i know this is kinda long but if you help me out thank you soo much.
18/f
so me and my ex broke up about 2 months ago (we dated 3 months). he just blew up at me and made me feel like shit so i said i don't need this and ended things with him. a few weeks later he messeged me telling me that he can't stop thinking about me and cried over me and really wants to get back with me and blahblah. i won't get back with him for a few reasons: 1. i can't forget the reason why we broke up and how miserable he made me feel. 2. he doesn't drive and he doesn't have a job so he never can afford to take me anywhere, i don't even think we've been on an actually date. and i have to drive EVERYWHERE 3. he's a year younger than me (i know this is a bad reason but i just feel that the maturity level is different) 4. i have a bad past about giving second chances to guys. i told him that i wouldn't get back with him because i rushed into a relationship with him too soon that i wasn't ready for. however, we've still been talking and hooking up, he's been alot better since we broke up, but i have a feeling he's the kind of guy that wants what he can't have. i like hooking up with him, like he's really cute and everything but i can't picture myself with him.
now i just met this guy at my friends party. he is everything i want in a relationship. he has a job, a license, a car, an amazing personality, athletic, he knows how to have a good time and i just think everything about him is attractive. i really want to date him but what do i tell my ex? i can always just stop talking to my ex but i like him as a friend and i wanna stay good friends so i don't wanna go down that path. soo any advice about this whole situation? thanks soo much (link)
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If you can't picture forever with your ex, he isn't worth it. If you ever decide to get back with him, you will never forget the things he said and did to you. You may be able to try and push them out of your mind but they will always be there.
This guy you met sounds like a good guy. I would try it out with him.
Tell your ex that you would just want to be friends. Don't rush right into a friendship, since he isn't over you, it's going to be way harder for him. So don't be too surprised if he doesn't want to talk with you so much for awhile. Tell him just friends. If he can't take that, then let him be and let him get over it.
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Okay... I have a question. I am fifteen now, but I was fourteen at the time, and my bf was sixteen. When we were dating I was what you would call "whipped". I basically let my bf do whatever he wanted, except when he asked for a hand job. I kept telling him no, no, no. But one night we were hanging out and making out on the couch. We were getting pretty into it and all of the sudden he just pulled down his shorts, grabbed my hand, put it on his you know what, and started moving my hand with his hand. It happened so quick, it took me a second to realize what was going on and when I did I pulled my hand away and started crying. I never even talked to him about it after that... but now that were broken up it keeps coming back to me and I don't know why. It wasn't that bad was it?? I don't know what to do... why is this bothering me so muchh??? (link)
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It's bothering you most likely because it was your first time ever doing that. He hurt you and it's going to be on your mind for awhile. You'll never forget it but eventually it won't bug you as much. That guy was a jerk so forget about him and don't go back to him. I hope everything goes well.
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My boyfriend is going camping this weekend with a group of friends.. part of that group of friends is his ex girlfriend..I can't go because i have to work. should i be worried? (link)
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If you trust him, don't worry yourself. If you know for a true fact that he does love you then you really don't have anything to worry about. If you're still bugging yourself about it, just talk to him and tell him you're just a little nervous about it. Good luck!
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Hello I am a 13 year old girl I like this boy and his brother told me that he likes me and I want to go out with him, should I give a hint, or ask him myself or wait and see if he would ask me? (link)
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If you are bold enough you could ask him yourself. But if not you should hint around that you like him and if he doesn't pick it up let him know how you feel and if he feels the same he should ask you out. Good luck!
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I'm a thirteen-year-old rising female freshman.
Back in September, I got my first boyfriend. Let's say his name was Tyler. Tyler verbally, mentally, and emotionally abused me for almost six months before I finally broke it off. The thing is - I know I was wrong to give in to this - I lost my virginity to Tyler. I thought I loved him, and adults around me believed we were in love too, so I don't know, I just felt like I could trust him. I know I was stupid, losing my virginity at thirteen to someone I no longer care about, but I've learned from my mistakes and won't do this for many years.
Now I've got a new boyfriend. Let's say his name is Aaron. I've known Aaron for almost two years now; we've always been close. I'm Aaron's first girlfriend. I love him a lot, and he's the person I trust most in this world. Recently, I accidentally let loose the fact that I have a deep dark secret (that I'm no longer a virgin). He got curious and asked what exactly my secret was, so I told him I trusted him enough that I would tell him by the end of the summer.
I have no regrets about saying I'd reveal my secret to him. I know he'd never tell anyone. What I am scared of, however, is what he'll think of me afterwards. What if he calls me a whore or something? I know that means he doesn't deserve me, that he isn't worth it. But unlike a lot of other people, his opinion means so much to me. I guess I kind of need some reassurance in my decision to tell him. D: (link)
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Well since you trust him alot and you know for a fact that he wouldn't tell anyone then it is fine for him to know as long as you trust him. Just let him know you totally regretted it and all that. Just so he doesn't get the impression that he HAS to and that you expect more out of him.
You learned from your mistakes and thats a good thing as long as you don't make those mistakes again.
Secrets bring people closer together too. Just make sure you KNOW for a fact he won't go around telling people a bunch of stuff, even if things ended badly between you two.
If he calls you a whore then you know he's not worth it and you'll learn more about him because of that and ended it sooner before it got worse. Most likely he won't since you guys are close. Good luck!
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I've been dating my girl for 6 months now, and I'm so in love with her.. but before me, she hooked up with a lot of guys and wasn't a great kid.. but then she met me and became an angel. i've done everything with this girl, and she promised me i was the first to finger her, eat her out and i was the first she gave a blow job too (sorry if this is too detailed) but then her ex boyfriend told me other wise.. and there is a rumor that she gave another dude head, and had sex with him, and that she gave another guy head. i've never cheated on her and i'm in love with her, i give her everything she wants. she tells me to put her on a lie detector test, so what should i do? believe her? or rumors?? (link)
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Even if she did do anything, it was her past. Maybe she doesn't want to tell you cause she may think that you might expect more from her or she doesn't want you to judge her. You never know, she may have a reason. If she was cheating on you then you would have a problem. So the most I can say is give her the benefit of the doubt. There is nothing really you can do to make her tell the truth. It's her choice and its all if you trust her. So if you're in love with her, you'd trust her. Just tell her to be honest with you and that it won't change anything. If she seems like a girl you can trust then there shouldn't be much of a problem. Good luck!
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hey guys, so i haven't been on this site in a while, but i would really appreciate the help.
i'm 17/f and enjoying life right now.
about 7 monthhs ago, right before my birthday, new job, license..etc. my boyfriend/ex (of a a year and ahalff) broke up with me. it was a horrible break up, and we've talked on and off, but now its horrible. he hates me so much, and never wants to speak to me again because i called him out. he lied to all of his friends and i told him he doesn't have to , to be accepted. he now hates me. the past 7 months have been so bad, i would hate myself, and not think i was good enough.
but now i'm almost there, almost over him and the whole thing. there's this new guy ( not really tho because he was my first kiss in 7thh grade and boyfriend, etc.) i honestly don't know where this is going, but i don't know what to do. has anyone ever felt confused about what to do, which direction to go? i think i just need a slap in a face from someone who's been there and who knows what'll happen. i just wanna have hope.
thanks! (sorrya bout the novel i just wrote) (link)
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I would say go for this guy that you're into. Cause apparently the last guy is a jerk so you'd want to get over him right? I don't know anything about this other guy but if he seems like a good guy then go for him. Even if things work out you know there are plenty of guys out there who would be lucky to have you. You still have your whole life ahead of you. Don't waste it on jerks who'll keep breaking your heart. Good luck!
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f/15
Is it a bad sign to feel discouraged in a relationship to the point where you just don't feel like you should be obligated to put any effort into a relationship anymore? My boyfriend and I haven't physically been with each other since two weeks before school ended (finals, APs, ect.) because there just wasn't enough time. I suppose I just feel like it's not the same if we're not able to see each other daily and live together like we do normally during the school year (boarding school).
This feeling has only recently occurred to me and I think the fact that I see a girl he used to be in love with who messes with his feelings and head all the time is flirting with him. He doesn't seem to be reciprocating the same exact vibes as her, but I still feel completely powerless because they're the same age (four years older), and it's discouraging and slightly intimidating, I'm not going to lie. Also, I feel like after this entire year where he's taken me for granted, it'd just be nice to take a break. Not that I don't love him, but I suppose it's just that I feel completely worn out.
So my question is, is it normal to feel like this after a while in a relationship? (we've been together around 7 months) He says he loves me, and I believe him but I feel like, at this point (while he should technically be a freshman in college), that because of my age, I'm not really worth much to him. And although this may sound ridiculous , I have to ask honestly if guys really do tend to value the girls they're with differently depending on age? I'm just trying to be realistic here (I acknowledge the fact that it would be completely understandable, with our age difference, for him to inadvertently establish some type of officious attitude towards our situation at times) but believe we have a good and healthy relationship, but I've become completely incredulous to the idea that he really values me.
So I was just wondering if this feeling just a normal occurrence/phase or if there's the possibility of it being some type of ominous sign that things would be better off if we were to revert back to simply being nothing more than friends. (and yes, we have had sex once)
So, yes, some advice would be greatly appreciated. :) (link)
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It is normal to feel that way, especially when there is an age difference cause you don't know how he feels about it. Right now would be the best time to talk to him about it so you know where he is act and if he is still willing to put effort into it and you don't have to discourage yourself on what is going on in his head. If you talk to him and you are still feeling the same, decided to take a break. It might be for the better. So best thing to do right now is talk to him. You'll see if the age difference is bothering you and tell him to be completely honest. Good luck and I hope everything works out for the better!
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ok, so im 14 and i really want a boyfriend but im not sure if im ready. i feel totally ready but then when i see guys in person and talk to them, i can't imagine kissing them because i feel nervous and sort of not ready. it's like an easier said than done thing, you know? so, am i ready or what's up with me? (link)
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You are always gonna be nervous so don't worry about that. If you both like each other then you should try it out if you want. Tell him you want to take it slow and then your first kiss will come naturally and you will be ready. Good luck!
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Okay so my 16 year old boyfriend dumped me in a text message four days after he guilted me into giving him head. (I'm fourteen). Yeah I know it was stupid and trust me, I regret it, and I'm not going to try and explain how I felt because no one can really understand it...
But anyway. So now we're broken up and I'm hearing some really awful things he's said about me (while we were dating and presently). And I really don't understand why he's doing this... Because I've done nothing to hurt him. I haven't screamed or yelled or made a scene or tried to get people to hate him or turn his friends against him (even though his best friend, we'll call him Pete, took my side after the break up, I never asked Pete to and my ex had been treating him like shit before that anyway). Well my ex and Pete are kiiind of still friends and he's been telling me all the horrible thing my ex has said. Like while we were dating my ex told his baseball team about how far we'd been and that he "had me so whipped" and that you gotta "keep your girl on a leash" and what not. The second part doesn't bother me so much as the first because my ex always promised me that stuff would stay between us... See, our schools baseball team is horrible. They act like girls exist to do what they want and they constantly pressure each other to try and get head or get sex and its disgusting, it really is. Well my ex told them all about me giving him head and the baseball team told the football team and the football team tells everyone else and now goodness... everyones talking about it because my reputation before this was "innocent good girl" and thats trashed now...
I talked to my ex and he's like "no one is judging you, we dated for six months" yet I'm having guys come up to me and ask if I will "put out for them too" or "if I knew you were down for this stuff I would of gone after you a long time ago" and its disgusting and I hate it!!! I know it's true but those kind of things are supposed to stay between you and your boyfriend and he promised me they would. I talked to him. He said he'd tell people he was lying but we know that's not gonna happen. And guess what else I found out??
He's been telling people we've had sex too. Now, that, is NOT true. And he's saying the most disgusting things like "yeah I was on top and I was scared I was gonna break her cause she's so tiny. But she was great, she let me do whatever I want. I could of put it up the ass if I'd wanted to" and I just don't even know what to do... I hate having everyone talk about me like this... I regret giving him a blow job SO MUCH. He just... at the time he made me feel so horrible for not giving him one. And i knew it was wrong but the things he said made sense to me at the time... I just, I don't know... I can't explain it. I know it's not an excuse. But he would say things like "it's been six months, don't you trust me enough to do this?" or, "you don't even want to try to make me happy" and I started believing all of this stuff... I just let him walk all over me and I started thinking it was okay. I just want my reputation back. I don't want to be known for this...
I know I don't deserve it. And I especially don't deserve the sex rumor. I just don't know what to do... My ex denies saying anything to anyone when I try to talk about it with him but I know he's lying. He says he'll tell people that the rumors aren't true but I can't trust him to do that. I just don't know what to do... :( Help.
Please, I'm begging you, don't judge me for doing what I did... If you knew how I felt at the time... Just so low and useless... I don't know. Please just tell me how I can handle this.
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Wow, what a jerk. There is nothing really you can do about people saying anything but ignore them. Which is reaaallly hard, but you know that.
It will blow over eventually and you learned from your mistake. You know the truth so should your best friends. If someone says something to you be like, "We never did that" And walk away, it will always effect you but if you don't show it, the people will get tired of bugging you about it.
Of course there are still the really immature people there who probably won't let it go. That's when you let it go.
If it gets totally out of hand then talk to your parents or school counselor. Good luck!
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