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I've been dating my boyfriend for a while now. We get along good and have mutual interests, and a pretty good chemistry. I spend every weekend, as well as Tuesdays and Thursdays with him. He lives about thirty minutes away, and we go to different schools, so we don't see each other as often.

In person, we are always laughing, always talkative, always sharing thoughts and memories. But when I call him, there is always something else more important going on. He's either watching television or playing video games, and I'm not a naggy person so I let him have his fun. But lately it's been so annoying. I'm always talking and there's just silence and the background noise from the tv from his line. He takes a few minutes for him to respond to things. I told him I wasn't going to call him if he's always distracted. He apologized and turned off the tv but the next time I called he kept the tv on when I threatened to hang up.

So how do I tell him firmly that I want to talk to him without so many distractions?

Thanks. I'm fifteen, and he's sixteen.

I agree with the person below me, mainly because I AM one of those people. I love my boyfriend of 2 years and I love talking to him but I hate talking on the phone. I just absolutely hate it, I think it's very awkward, no matter who I'm talking to. I know you want him to pay attention to you but it seems to me like he does. Just try to see things from his side and enjoy the time you do get to spend with him. Best of luck, Jess.

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F/15
Ok, so I finally got the boyfriend I've been wanting since I was a little kid. He's amazing and I'm so glad to be with him. But I'm having an issue. He's been acting like he likes a very good friend of mine (we'll call her Olga). I've only been dating him for three weeks, but he's been hanging out with this girl a lot lately and its bothering me. I have a good reason for it too... let me explain the whole thing.
This is a long story, sorry. Ok so originally, my boyfriend was dating this girl, we'll call her Penelope. I was really close with him at this time and to be honest, I liked him even though he was dating Penelope, who I was friends with. I couldn't help it... He's an amazing guy. I was guilty about it, don't get me wrong, but... yeah.
Then after two months, Penelope broke up with him. I was texting him throughout the entire thing (yeah, she broke up with him through text-very unexpected) and helping him through it. I wsa NOT thinking about a relationship with him at that time, I was focusing on getting my two friends back together. Once I figured out she was sure she was over him, I tried helping him get over her, not cuz I wanted to date him, but because he was obsessing over a girl who didn't like him.
Two weeks after the break up, he started telling me about how he sorta wanted to go out with Olga. He said she was the type of girl he liked. (He didn't say it, but shes smart, absolutly gorgeous, a talented musician, and always looking perfect and cute and all). And I was really hurt by this, but I tried to hide it.
I dealt with him talking about this girl for a month, and then he asked me if there were any girls he should think about going out with, and I told him I thought he had already decided he wanted to go out with Olga. He said Olga would be a nice girl to go out with, but he hadn't made any official decisions. He told me he wanted to know who liked me so he could find out who he liked. I told him he should focus on who he liked and go from there. Then he said he liked a girl, and after a day full of guessing and teasing, he told me it was me. At the same time, he was making me tell him who I liked, and it was him. After making sure Penelope was ok with it, he asked me out, and we've been dating for about three weeks now :]
But all we've done so far is hold hands, nothing more than that. And he's hanging out with Olga and talking to Olga a whole lot. I don't know what to do, it really hurts. He says he thinks I'm amazing and beautiful and that he likes me a lot... But... Olga's still there and still gorgeous. And he did like her. I don't know what to do.
I might be overreacting, but please, help me!!

This must be really really hard for you, it would be for me...but I agree with the post below. If he hasn't done anything to make you not trust him, you shouldn't just assume he's going to cheat on you or anything. A relationship can only work with trust. And if he does end up to be a cheating jerk, so what? That just means she gets a guy who is unfaithful and you will find someone who loves you and isn't going to stray. You do have a right to be uncomfortable about this situation, but don't let your jealousy destroy your relationship. Best of luck hun, Jess.

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Long story short, I asked a friend to prom who wasn't my boyfriend. The Thing is, I knew my boyfriend didn't really want to go, although he offered to take me. He hates dances and wouldn't enjoy himself, I didn't wan't to force him into a situation that makes him unhappy. We also have a long distance relationship, so I would have to pay a lot more money to take him when he wouldn't really want to be there in the first place. I genuinely thought that he would be relieved not to go, but I made the mistake of assuming he would be okay with it. However, when I told him he was really upset. We have been going out for almost a year and never fought until now. I feel terrible and want to make it up to him more than anything. Please, I need some advice on how to fix this ad apologize.

Yeah...that was definitely not the smartest thing to do. I wouldn't want my boyfried doing that to me, especially without consulting me. How would you feel if he went with someone else? If you want to fix this, you need to talk to him. Say to him: "I'm really sorry that I did this, I wasn't thinking clearly. What do you need me to do to make you feel better?" I don't blame him at all for being upset, he has the right to and it's good that you recognize that it was wrong. All you can do is talk to him and hope he can forgive you. Best of luck, Jess.

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I have so much anger && depression in me.
For the past month or two . My life has been taking completly changing and its not the first time , its like this time its really hurting me. I cry myself to sleep everyday, and with no on to even talk i mean no one . When Im around people im fine but hahaa when iget home it just comes . Ive mistreated way to long . But you guys are giving advice like its so easy its not really i dont know to deal with this at all .

Nobody ever said it was easy. Life isn't easy. No one's life is perfect, so that shouldn't be your expectation, or you will be thoroughly disappointed. Here on Advicenators, we give people advice. It's up to them to decide what to do with it. If you've decided that there is no changing of the dark place you're in, then there is absolutely nothing any of us here can do for you. It is up to YOU to decide how you are going to fix your predicament, all we are trying to do is lend you a hand in doing so. Considering we have all been depressed and been through bad things before (everyone, not just the people here on this site) I'd say you should be more open minded to other people's advice. You can't just say 'oh that will never work, my situation is completely different' to everyone who tries to help you. Also, it would probably help if you elaborated on your situation a little bit more. It's all anonymous here, so you don't have to worry about people knowing who you are or anything. Anyways, best of luck, Jess.

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i have been with my girlfriend for awhile,how do i know when she is ready to have sexual contact?

13/m

You'll know when she tells you herself. If you pressure her into it, she'll probably regret it. Wow, it still astounds me how young kids are wanting to have sex these days. I agree with the person below me, you have your whole life to do these things.

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I'm asking this for my friend who is too chicken to do this himself. He and his girlfriend of one year and 14 days broke up. She broke up with him. They were doing the the long distance. After our first semester of college she broke up with him saying that she was too busy and join so many clubs and whatever. He didn't want to break up. So now next semester he is still into her. Everytime he's one facebook he looks at her wall posts, who she added as friend, and new pictures. Its kind of creeping me out. So what should i do or say to help move on? I'm running out of ideas, Help!

Well first off, Facebook creeping is actually really common now-a-days. Everyone I know that has a Facebook account does it, so that shouldn't freak you out or make you worry or anything. It's normal. Also, when a break up occurs, friends need friends to be around and support them. There really isn't anything you can say to make everything better, but just be there for him and invite him to hang out as often as you want to because it will make him feel wanted, which is what everyone really wants to feel after a really bad break up. You didn't mention if you were a guy or a girl, so hanging out could be different things, depending on what you like to do. Anyways, just be there for him, hang out with him, bring him food, whatever. He can't be upset forever. Goodluck, Jess.

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Okay so my cousin has a boyfriend & i dont, he likes me & i didnt like him, i told my cousin everything that he said; because im a good friend, but then i started liking him too... what do i do!!?

You just need to let him go. It's good that you told your cousin about him flirting with you but if she doesn't break up with him, then you shouldn't interfere any further. He's still her boyfriend so it's not right for you to flirt back with him. If he continues to flirt with you, say something like 'I don't want to hurt my cousin, and you need to stop being unfaithful' or just ignore him. If they break up in the future, then you can go after him I guess, but for now, set your sights on other guys, preferably ones that are not in a relationship. Goodluck, Jess.

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i'm 18 and my boyfriend will be 18 in a couple weeks. we have been going out for 3 years almost and were never allowed to sleep over, ( my mom doesnt like the idea) now i get that in her house its her rules and thats how she wins the arguments always. however, i am now 18 and i feel that i can sleep at his house. his parents find it okay becuase we have been going out for so long. his mom wanted to throw him a party for his birthday and thought it was going to get late and instead of me leaving stay at his house and sleep in the spare room just to make my mom at ease. she said she would even talk to her if she had concerns. i just want to be able to tell my mom what is going on and her not to say no. I mean i try to go about this as if you want me to lie to you fine, but i can tell you the truth and youll know what is really going on. i have talked to her about sleeping over before and she says when i have my own place i can do what i want when i want how i want. and i get that thats totally reasonable, but i dont want to move out at 18. to me if we have been going out this long and im not pregnant then its not going to happen. another reason i want to stay at his house more is its just convienent. and hes leaving at the end of the summer across the country so my chances of seeing him ever again are slim. i mean we may not work out we may stay in touch ill visit him, but i want to make the most of what we have now and not have to be treated as a 12 year old girl. i'm a over all good person i listen to my mom i rarley give her a hard time i tell her the truth i tell her where i am and what time she wants me home ill be there i keep up my grades to an 80 or above i have two jobs where i dont ever take time off from i have a car that i pay for. i mean i show all the responsibilites of a grown person and yet i feel like i cant do anything. how do i go about this? opinions please!

You aren't being treated like a 12 year old...you're being treated like any normal teenager that lives with their parents. She's just looking out for you. You can't just say "If I haven't gotten pregnant in the 3 years that we've been together then it won't happen." If you are sexually active then you are ALWAYS running the risk of getting pregnant. Every single time you have sex there is a risk. Your mom sees that and is just being a good mom because 18 is still too young to get pregnant and have a baby. Try to understand it from her point of view. Best of luck, Jess.

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Hello, (Sorry, if it's long..>..< What do you guys think? Do I just need to relax and wait until I'm able to talk with him again? :/

The last sentence, yes. Just chillout. You seem to be living your relationship in the future, thinking he might break up with you, he might cheat on you, he might hurt you. He's got a lot on his plate right now and I'm sure he doesn't need you worrying so much about the stability of your relationship. You need to be confident in your feelings towards each other because doubt is one of the things that can tear a relationship apart. I'm sure he's trying to talk to you and see you as much as he can, so try not to worry so much. Find other hobbies to do to occupy the time that you don't get to see/talk to him so you won't worry so much. Goodluck, Jess.

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Ok so hey everyone well to start off I am 13 female and my friend is 12 female and the other day she started liking this 14 year old in the grade ahead of us, well she wanted me to help her, so I was like yeah this'll be fun because I don't even know him he don't know me. Ok so she wanted me to text him first so I did and he ignored me didn't text back (guessing because he didn't know me) (plus don't know what I look like) now anyway she finaly text him and they t4ext forever and they flirted and had good conversations, I read all of it off her phone! and then yesterday morning I was sitting at the 7th grade table and I was the only one there noone else had came in yet, and he was the only one at the 8th grade table across from me and well every two seconds he would look over and stare at were I was sitting, then this morning me and my friend that likes him got there first and he was there then 8th grade left first so I decided to look and find him and when I did he was looking right at me and our eyes met then he jumped startled and walked off. It is really wierd because he don't even know me and that stuff happens, then he acts like yeah he likes my friend and stuff, and from all this helping my friend I am starting to like him myself!!!! so please help I am confused about a couple things like I said!
1.) He keeps looking and our eyes meet (but he don't even know me)

2.) I think he likes my friend they talk/ flirt a lot!

3.) I am starting to like him!!! so please help(: thankkss(:

You're saying that you know you shouldn't like him, so there's your answer. Trust me, you don't EVER want to get between your best friend and a boy she likes. EVER. Just be happy for her and if he shows interest in you, then don't show interest back. Let your friend have a chance with him. Goodluck, Jess.

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me and my boyfriend have been going out for a while like a while years. so we've been rocky i love him and i iwill be there for him if hes sick poor healty happy mad sad ect. i love him no matter what. so i thought i liked this kid from work yah hes cute and what not but i didnt like him and i sitll have no feelings for this guy still. but my boyfriend gets mad at any guys commenting my stuff on facebook which i get because i wouldnt like it if girls did that to him becuase its like oh they must talk. this guy i do talk to i guess like casual talk tonight we talked on facebook for a while i feel kinda bad yah i flirted but i dont like him at all my boyfriend is like ignoring me lately and i dont care if that other guy likes me because i dont want him i want my man. i just dont like to hide stuff i know if he read that he would break up with me as i would with him too. its like im confused but know what i wantl. i want my boyfriend! this other guy is like becoming a friend i think. i think flirting is okay as long as you know boundries like not messaging eachother i dont think ill do it again because it felt unfaithful like even if i have no interest in the other guy.i am being honost with myself i dont like him if i had to imagine being with him then my other boyfriend i would be devestated i love being with my boyfriend the thought of him being with someone else or me with someone else makes me sick. i dont want it to happen. i just want reasurance here i want things to be okay with me and my boyfriend and your thoughts.

Well you seem to already know what you want, so that's good. You want your boyfriend, so here's my advice: do what you can to stay with him. Make sure you have an open and honest relationship BUT I will say one thing...if you tell him about flirting with this other guy and then say that it 'didn't mean anything', do NOT expect him to just be ok with that. If I were you, I wouldn't tell him. It might relieve your guilt, but it will hurt him a lot and it could make him not trust you, which will put a strain on your relationship. Learn from this mistake, and don't do it again. Goodluck, Jess.

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Okaii well he broke up with me and got with this girl that i HATE sooo what to i do i want too tell her off sooo give me somethings to say thanks

Why would you tell her off? He's the one that dumped you...it seems more logical to be mad at him. Anyways, don't tell her off. It will make your exboyfriend see you as melodramatic and immature. Boys come and go, and if you tell off all of their new girlfriends, I guarantee you aren't going to have very many friends. Just move on and ignore them. Goodluck, Jess.

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When is the best time to have unprotected sex?

and how often do condoms break?

and when u have sex can it make ur period come a little bit later than it normally would, even though you are NOT pregnant?

1. NEVER.

2. Not that often, but it is possible.

3. Yes it can make it come later.

Best of luck, Jess

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Is it ok for a guy to hit his girlfriend, even if she did something to piss him off really bad?

No, it isn't. If a relationship ever develops into a physically violent relationship, you need to get out of it. It's never ok for a guy to hit his girlfriend or for a girl to hit her boyfriend. Best of luck, Jess.

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I asked my ex new gf if she love him and she said she really do love him! i cant stop crying because i love him and he love me too but he told me that he broke up with her! now he's locked up so i don't know what to do :'( I said i was going to let him go since she love him because when me and him was going out all these girls try to come between us and i guess i don't want her to feel the same as i did! i dont know what to do! :'(

Don't be a crazy ex-girlfriend and try to break the two of them up. If it's meant to be between you and this guy, it will happen on it's own, without any assistance from you. Just let it be, find a hobby, and allow it to be your main focus until you get over this guy. Best of luck, Jess.

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16/f

So this is probably gonna be long...
Well I have a boyfriend of almost 2 months. We really like each other and all that. We were friends for about 2 years before we decided to date. He is my age.

Then there is this guy who I've also been friends with for 2 years. He's 18 and we liked each other. But we decided nothing to happen since he's going to college. He'll be coming home for breaks and all that and I'm gonna go to the same college as he is, not because he is going there, it's just always been the plan. Don't know why any of this matters..but yeah. I've had a crush on him for over a year. I liked him more than my ex boyfriend of 10 months. We told each other we liked each other and all that and he'd call me and you know, we were really good friends. We talked about future and us and all that.
I'm also best friends with his sister so I'm always at her house. She's totally cool that we like each other and all that.

Well last week during our break I was at their house. His sister had to leave and only he and his mom was home and it was like 1am. We were texting and then he asked if he could come in there when his mom fell asleep. I knew something was gonna happen. I knew I would be cheating on my bf but I thought about it, I liked him for so long and he's finally into me and I didn't want to let it go. So we just made out.

Ok, yeah, I admit it was wrong but I can't take it back. I'm not planning on telling my bf either. I'm not one to cheat on someone, I've never done it before obviously but in all honesty, this guy would be the only guy I'd ever do that with.
So I realized that it was a mistake. I still like my boyfriend and have little feelings for my friend.
Mostly because my friend likes another girl that I'm sorta friends with. I mean it hurt because I had just made out with him a few weeks ago and then I find out he also likes her. I'm not jealous, I just feel a bit used. He told me he wouldn't use me and he didn't. He said he still likes me. I believe it but it just brought me to thinking that I'm not as good as the other girl and he'd rather be with her than me. They're the same age too. I just hate the feeling of being compared to her. It'd be hypocritical of me to be mad that he likes someone else because of course I'm with someone else. That's not the case though. I'm just confused.

I'm not quite sure what my question is and I spent all night crying over this situation so I basically just vented and I need someone to help me out or give me some advice. Also does this make me a bad person? I feel the guilt but I can't take it back..
Thanks so much!

Good plan on not telling your boyfriend. You obviously aren't planning on continously cheating on him so telling him would only hurt him, and you don't want that to happen. So I think you're a good person for sparing his feelings :) as far as the cheating goes, you're only human. You seem pretty logical about this, you thought about it, and you feel guilt for it, and you know that the guilt is the consequence of cheating. So you learned from your mistake and that's always good. For the other issue, about the guy liking another girl, don't sweat it. It doesn't make her better then you in any way, shape, or form. We all are attracted to very general qualities and you 2 probably share a lot in common. It sounds to me like he thinks liking this girl might just be more conveniant for him. Which, of course, isn't even up to you, much less your 'fault'. So overall, it's ok to feel guilty, but you can't really do much about that...it will fade over time. You shouldn't compare yourself to this other girl, you like to boys and he likes 2 girls, you and this other girl. So you should understand how it's not about choosing one over the other, it's just about liking people's qualities. And, above all, you are definitely not a bad person. You made a mistake, you learned from it, and you're trying to make it right by not doing it again. So you sound like a pretty good person to me :)

Goodluck! -jess 16/f

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20 female.

So before I started having sex I thought, "I'm not going to be one of those girls that moans ..I just can't see myself doing that."

But then the first time I had sex, I moaned like crazy. It just came naturally like it basically just came out. I wasn't embarrassed at the time because I was so in the moment but now that I think about it, do guys like when you moan? Does it turn them on or do they think it's weird?

Also, what else can you do to a guy while having sex that will really get him going? I know all guys are usually different, but any advice would be appreciated!

Well I can't speak for all guys, but my boyfriend tells me he loves it. He also says that guys like it when a girl gets really into it. Like if you're on bottom maybe pulling him closer and kissing him all over...stuff like that :b

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how can i get any guy that i want ? i really like this boy in my class but he have a girlfriend and this crush is driving me crazy i don't really know he's so hot and really cute ! what to do ?

If he has a girlfriend, then I would recommend against any flirting with him. How would you feel if another girl stole away your boyfriend? How do you think that would make other people see you? Stay away from him unless their relationship ends, there are plenty of other fish in the sea.

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So my girlfriend and i have been dating for almost a year know and before now she had hung out with me a ton like almost everyday possible. I'm not saying thats all we did, we definately had some free time and hung out with our bros or girls. but just now she didn't hang out with me this whole week and like was like i'm just out don't worry. Then she called me and told me that she was hanging with these dudes who have been like wanting to hookup with her for like ever.. and i was like its whatever and she was like "well i mean i didn't want you to get upset cause i know you know that they think i'm really hott and stuff.. it was just so much fun like i felt so special cause they like just talked about how attractive i was and how they were obsessed with me! i know it sounds weird but i wanna hang with them a lot more i'm sorry if it interferes with us but like they make me feel so wanted.." like i feel like scared and what not like i dunnoo.. am i overreactinggg i feel like they are going to like take her and stuff... There has been other situations too but this is enough for now.

idk but it's been worrysome.. Thank you

I'd dump her too. It seems like she's wanting you to act like you "want" her more. If she's insecure enough to try to make you really jealous, then that's definitely a problem. Find someone who isn't going to demand all of your attention and scare you. Goodluck.

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hi i had sex with a guy i was dating like two or three months ago and i was taking the pill but the day after i ran out and then im just now like a week ago getting back on it but im always tired i get the hickups all the time i fee weak i feel sick i was eating dinner with my mom it was this stuff i use to like and as soon as i smelled it it made my belly turn and i hjust couldnt eat but i took a test a week after we had sex could it be the pill doing that to me ? i hada miscarriage before when i1st started taking the pill but i didnt know i was pregnant until it was too lated and im getting sharp pains that start at my belly button and it shoots all the way down my vag i have no idea what it is but i had the pain before but i was also on the pill before when i got the pain to so idk if im pregnant the test said i wasnt so i didnt stop taking the pill and i dont want to talk to my mom about it she would get mad that im on the pill she got mad when she found out my 35 year old sister was on it she doesnt like it cause what can happen when you on it and she also got pregnant with my brother on it so please help thanks alot
megan

Take another test. Chances are you aren't, since the first one was negative. But it wouldn't hurt to be sure. I had a similar experiance with my boyfriend and a pregnancy scare. I got really paranoid and was freaking out for a week for no reason. Stay calm and take another test if you need the reassurance :)

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