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My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 months and the flame is slowly dying out. I really need a song to remind him how much I still love and care about him. I've found tons of songs, but none of them just really hit home about the way I truly feel. I need something that says how hard I'm trying and how much I truly love and care about him.

Any help is greatly appreciated please and thanks!

Love songs that pander to feelings and emotion are like sticky-sweet cotton candy. I'm sure they make you feel good, but they have very little substance and really aren't very good for you. If you and your boyfriend are mature enough to realize what love is really about, then a song like that will be a nice gesture, but have little real meaning anyway.

To that end, I suggest "The Weight", by Thrice:



There’s many who’ll tell you they’ll give you their love,
But when they say “give” they mean “take.”
They’ll hang ‘round just like vultures till push comes to shove.
They’ll take flight when the earth starts to shake.

Someone may say that they’ll always be true,
Then slip out the door ‘fore the dawn.
But I won’t leave you hanging on.
Another may stay till they find someone new,
Then before you know they’ll be gone.
But I won’t leave you hanging on;
No, I won’t be that someone.

And come what may, I won’t abandon you or leave you behind
Because love is a loyalty sworn, not a burning for a moment.
And come what may, I will be standing right here by your side;
[ Thrice Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
I won’t run away, though the storm’s getting worse and there’s no end in sight.

Some talk of destiny, others of fate,
But soon they’ll be saying goodbye.
But I won’t leave you high and dry.
Because a ring don’t mean nothing
If you can’t haul the weight,
And some of them won’t even try,
But I won’t leave you high and dry;
I won’t leave you wondering why.

And storms will surely come,
But true love is a choice you must make
And you’re the one that I have set my heart to choose.
As long as I live, I swear I’ll see this through.




Remember, your love for your boyfriend is a loyalty sworn, not a burning for a moment.

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i'd like to hear everyone and anyone's opinion, but i'd love for the older columnists to help me on this one... question being, do you think there is a certain age in which you can REALLY fall IN love with someone? Or do you think you can fall in love at any age, whether you're 16 or 50? So many people say at 8 you cannot fall in love, yet at 16 you can.. what is the difference? of course, the difference with any age is experiance, but do you guys really believe these theories? i want opinions!!! thanks =]

flirty

"So many people" are morons. You can fall in love at any age. In fact, younger people usually fall in love faster and harder because they lack the emotional experience to stop themselves. If anything, I'd say the ability to love DECREASES as you get older.

People who say "Oh, no. That's not REAL love" or "Oh, they're just confusing lust for love" are kidding themselves.

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I had a little get together with some friends including my boyfriend david and an guy i cheated on my boyfriend with (over a year ago, joe) last week. We played stupid drinking games and truth or dare and my boyfriend is claiming i was staring at the joe the whole time although i was basically the only one who didn't get with him. i mean i think he is good looking but have been with my boyfriend close to two years, i love him a lot and don't want joe anymore. Its not like this is the first time they have been together in a room because we all go to the same parties..have the same friends. that next two nights david and i are fighting because he claims i still like joe.. he doesn't understand. then i was out for vacation the whole weekend... friday sat sun mon and i'm back its already tuesday.. i texted him sat saying i'm sorry and i love him and we should talk and all he said was have fun and we should??? i don't feel like i need to be explaining myself and i've tried to make things better and i'm just gonna wait for him to apolgize. did i or did i not do somethihng wrong? its not like if i had any physical contact with the guy, i barely talked to him! and to make things better, i'm almost positive david went out with his friends, like always whenever i am not around, got drunk and missed work because we work at the sameplace so i know... it just bugs me too because i never ever go out with out him and he always goes out with out me because i usually have work on weekend and such... i feel like we should take a break maybe with so much kiddy stuff going on.. Like i said its been a few days, i do miss him but obviously he wants it to be like this? what do i do? besides just sitting down and talking to him?

Normally I would pin the fault on your boyfriend -- After all, a relationship can only work if all parties involved have a pretty high level of trust in each other.

However, you DID cheat on him, and your boyfriend is right to be uneasy about all this, given your history. You lost your boyfriend's trust when you chose to cheat on him. You won't get it back by dumping him the minute he starts to feel uneasy. That would only confirm his doubts.

Assuming you want to keep your boyfriend, don't wait for him to apologize. Sit him down and explain yourself. Don't blame him, he's right to be uneasy. Tell him you're still interested in persuing a relationship and hope he can learn to trust you again. If not, let it be a lesson to you in any future relationships you may have. Your cheating (A year ago or not) may have just killed your relationship -- After all, a relationship can only work if all parties involved have a pretty high level of trust in each other.

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let's say your boyfriend or someone you really like asks you to give them head. well, not asks you, but says it like "give me head." or "get down." or "how bout a blow job?"

how can you say no? or reject them? and they don't have to be nice rejections.

A blunt request deserves a blunt response.

"No." Nothing else really needs to be said.

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this might sound really stupid but how do you know when your in love? i really really really like my boyfriend but i wouldn't wanna say i love you if i didnt mean it...thing is, we've only been dating for like 3 weeks, for anyone in a relationship how long did it take before you said 'i love you' please dont tell me "you'll know when your in love" cause that doesnt really help...tell me anything about your relationships...thankss.

Love is an emotion, a state of being. It's not a club you join after fulfilling X requirements, like being in a relationship for a certain amount of time. You either have it or you don't. You either know you're in it or you aren't. If you have to ask, that usually means you're not there yet.

It varys by relationship. I've had relationships where I've gone the entire duration without having to say "I love you". I've had relationships where the phrase let slip on Day 2. In my current relationship (Currently going on strong for over two years), the "I love you" came out of the bag before the first month was up.

Relationship length doesn't (or shouldn't) factor in. If you feel you love a guy, who. Conversely, if you don't, or aren't sure if you do, don't feel pressured to. You have all the time in the world, and you stand nothing to lose by waiting.

An old saying goes "If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it". Applied to your case, it would read "If you have to ask, you probably shouldn't".


On a side note, I really pity those who feel that they alone have "love", and have the brass balls to tell others "What you have isn't REAL love. Believe me, I know your feelings better than you do."

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i really like my boyfriend and whenever we make out i get really wet...like we're not even doing anything sexual but i get so wet and i dont really like it lol im afraid if we actually do do something i'll like squirt (ew) is it normal for this? oh and we've only been together for a few weeks so is it because its a new relationship? thanks

Completely normal.

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I like this guy, i know i do. But like sometimes i sit and think to myselp "why"...I can never answer it. All i get is he makes me feel...and thats it. I dont know i just cant explain it. And i dont know why. All i got is He makes me feel...
I cant debate my feelings, i have so many times there is nothing left. Matter of fact thats how i got "he makes me feel..."

well like he has told people before he likes me, and like i said i know i like him i just cant figure out why. Like he isnt cute nd he can be a real jerk sometimes, but its so cute how he gets jealous and how he smiles everytime he sees me. And how he tries to make me happy if im sad. And he kissed my neck before and i thought i was going to i dont know what :) and he acts like hes going to bite me playfully to get me laughing, he defends me. But i cant tell WHY i like him. Lke if someone says why do you like him? i just stand there like a retard because i fully cannot answer the question because it is like hard to explain. I want you to help me figure out why i like him.

And i have another question, i dont know how true this is because i have never heard it...
Someone told me that if a guy kisses your neck and you enjoy it, that its love...

Firstly, in a majority of cases (especially at your age), you won't be able to give solid "reasons" about the way you feel. In reality, they aren't that important.

The neck kissing thing is rather untrue. If a guy kisses your neck and you enjoy it, it's lust or it's physical attraction. It COULD be love, but it's foolish and dangerous to assume that the first two automatically mean the third.


Sooo, I can't help you figure out why you like him. You just do. Love is emotional business, a far cry from structure and logic. You really don't need to concern yourself with the "Why". If you like him, you like him. It needs no further justification than that.

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do you believe love happens more than once in your life??

Yes.

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ok so im 15 (gonna be 16) female me and my boyfriend have been dating for 4 months sept.12th he purposed to me basically, so were technically engaged. well he is really shy.he started holding my hand, and hugging me, and just recently like hmmm... last week he kissed me for the 1st time. he doesnt want to rush anything but finally he kissed me but it was just a peck, but i no it will be more later, it will just take time, well my question is how can i get him to be less shy, and talk more, and hold me and stuff by feeling more comfortable around me. please help me, i really wish he can be more comfortable with me, and how can i control my jealousy, i have this huge jealousy problem, i dont even trust him round my friends, only 1. =/ please help me, im even jealous of his girl cousin. i feel horrible

Enagement and marriage aren't trivial matters, and they aren't for people who can't open up to each other or have jealousy problems.

First and foremost, my advice would be to put off any wedding plans until after you have your respective issues resolved. The shyness will fix itself in time, so long as you continue being loving and supportive.

The jealousy issue is a little more complicated. You need to learn to trust him, especially if you're going to be marrying this guy. Instead of telling yourself that horrible things will happen and that you can't trust him around your friends, tell yourself the opposite, and truely believe it.

Edit: It takes two to have an affair. If you trust him, there shouldn't be a problem. Believe that he is devoted to you as much as you are devoted to him, and believe that he won't fall for the batting eyelashes of every harlot that throws herself at him.

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To make it simple: I cheated on my boyfriend. Twice. Once was with a boy I took a trip to Europe with. We made out after having a few too many drinks. This was back in April. Just a few nights ago, my friend and I went to our friend's apartment and we also drank, so I ended up sleeping on the couch with one of the guys, and we also made out and he tried to finger me but I didn't let him.

I feel like pure crap. I've been with my boyfriend for over three years. I don't even know why I did it, but I'm guessing it was just the thrill of being with someone other than my boyfriend for once (since we've been together so long and that 'infautation phase' has passed). I love my boyfriend more than words can express and he loves me too. There are very, very, very slim chances that my boyfriend will EVER find out about these mistakes. So, I chose not to tell him. These hook ups meant absolutely nothing to me, and were mostly the result of too much to drink (which I have only drank one other time besides these two).

Any advice on how to cope/what to do? I am not going to tell my boyfriend, but I just need some general advice and to know I'm not the only one in this situation. Thanks in advance.

You're not the only one in this situation, no. But that doesn't make it okay. You cope by resolving the issue and obtaining closure, and you get that by coming clean. Until then, you're going to continue feeling like crap (Unless you somehow manage to convince yourself that what you've done is okay or acceptable, in which case you're beyond redemption)

tl;dr -- Tell him, or the guilt will continue.

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howwww do you give a hand job and/or a blow job?

Firstly, giving detailed "how-to" sex advice goes against Advicenators policy, and could result in a ban for the advice-giver:
http://www.advicenators.com/faq.php?f=47

That said, there's an old saying that goes something like "If you have to ask, you can't afford it". Adapting it to your situation, it would read something like "If you have to ask, you shouldn't be doing it".

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i am 17 years old and i have this probloem with pot. you see my boyfriend and i started dating almost a year ago and before then he was really into the pot, but he stoped fot me, now my boyfriend is have like withdrawl beacuse he says he needs and he hasnt needed it like 2 months. but out of no where he needs it. i dont know what to do i cant stand pot and he knows, i just dont want it to ruin out relationship.

People don't go through pot "withdrawls". It's not physically addictive in the least--only psychologically addictive.

If your boyfriend really is having withdrawls, it's because he misses the feeling of blazing and getting blown, not because he "needs" it. Keep in mind that whatever he does from this point on is a choice. If you tell him "Either the pot goes or I go", and he chooses the pot, well...

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15/f.

Ok, so i've been goin out with this guy for about 10 or 11 months, he's my best friend as well as my boyfriend, we've known each other since we were 8 years old. so its a really strong bond we have. But just recently things have like started to heat up abit, he told me he wants to go further with me, and that he loves me so much. He said he knows we could go further and I want to. But I'm not to sure anymore as he's been doing really minxy gestures and it feels good, i won't deny that but I'm just feeling this doubt.
Should I Go For It ?
Or Not ?

Help ?
Signed, Lou.

X

Nobody can make this decision for you, although if you're waiting until you're absolutely sure, chances are you'll be waiting forever. Go with your gut instinct.

Whatever you decide to do, do it safely of course.

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im CC ( bi female) and me and my girlfriend want to kiss but we are debating who should start/ initiate the kiss and we are going back and forth saying "you do it" and "no you do it" so who should go first....

Girlfriend...
or CC....

Instead of "who should go first?", a better question to ask would be "does it matter who goes first?", and the answer to that is no, it doesn't matter.

For the sake of circumventing frivilous issues like this, you should initiate it.

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13/ f

this is for skaters. (((skateboarders)))

do you like it if a girl is a skater to (((not punk or goth or anything ))). or do you like prissier, preppier girls?

Although I'm not a "skater", and I'm not at an age where I have an opinion on the styles 13/fs choose, I have to comment on the futility of your question. It's pointless to ask any kind of "What do guys like" questions. You can ask 50 different guys and get 50 different answers.

Instead, if you're interested in a guy, and you're okay with selling out part of your identity to attract him (I'm assuming you are, since you asked this question), my advice to you is to ask him what he thinks, instead of asking the internet.

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hi me and my boyfriend have been dating for 6 and a half months im 19 and so is he when we first starting dating it was great he called me every night he texted me all the time and we always had fun together now he rarely calls or texts if he does call its around midnight and if i call him he is always with his friends and either says i cant talk right now or he talks to them the whole time while i am on the phone listeneing and sometimes he calls me when he is with the friends and i just have to listen to him talk to them and now we are always fighting he never invites me to do anything with him and his friends anymore either he awways teels me wat hes doing as hes doing it doesnt even invite me and his friends are over every night and he says he didnt invite them that they have a key and he doesnt even wanna b there with them we never really go out anymore we just sit at home and watch tv he says he is always romantic but i cant even remember the last time he was, we only see each other like 1 a week, we both really love each other but then sometimes he can be really sweet, i just dont know wat to do wat should i do to save our relationship

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543428

Asking the same question twice won't yield you a different answer. Since all you bothered to do was copy/paste, I'll do the same:


hi well sometimes people change the problem might be him but the problem might also be you too try to rexamine your expectations of your relationship and his expectations and try to come to an agreement on what you guys should be doing and how often fights are common after the honeymoon stage and should be considered normal unless they happen very frequently and/or are very serious if you can't agree on a set of expectations it might be best to break it off since neither of you are happy as things stand hope I helped.



How did this manage to become featured question, anyway?

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am hurt my bf just broke up with me becaused i put my h girl to talk to him he said this was no game i cry to him begg him but i dk what else to do he keeps textin me how does it feels i really love him but what should i do

Any given relationship has two or more people in it, and as such can't be controled by one person alone.

For you, this means that if your (ex) boyfriend wants to break up with you, it's his choice and his right to do so, and there's nothing you can (or should) do to stop him. Even if you could, it would be a terrible idea to do so. Imagine being stuck in a relationship you don't want. It would be terrible!

He has made it clear that his decision is final. Pack up your emotional baggage and move on.

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I’m a 50 years-old man and I addicted a lot of sexual relations and dating with very beautiful ladies .I decided recently to quite this unsatisfied behavior .I have stopped dating women for four months so far and I want to continue for more one year .Can you help my with some advice how I can be strong against the temptation of women especially that I’m single.

Firstly, don't lie about your age. Advicenators do not like being lied to.

Secondly, your addiction, like all addictions, is fundamentally a matter of will. Although there are little tricks you can use to help yourself (Which I'll get into later), ultimately it comes down to how badly you want to quit this behavior and how much effort you're willing to put into conquering yourself.

Now, should you find yourself needing a bit of help along the way, try neo-pavlovian conditioning. What that means is, reward yourself every time you do a behavior you strive for (In this case, not having sex), and punish yourself every time you give in. The rewards and punishments don't have to be big, just little bits of encouragement and discouragement. The main driving force is still your willpower.

If you find it hard to not cheat your own system, have someone else administrate the rewards and punishments for you. Addictions are easier to overcome with the support of loved ones anyway.

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I'm 18. Should I go out with a 26 year old guy?

I have no where near enough information to say if you should go out with this guy or not--All I know about him is his age. However, his age by itself is no reason NOT to go out with him, so there you go.

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my boyfriend and i can be pretty romantic. we want to go out to dinner at a nice resturant. theres a problem, hes allergic to fish. just smelling fish makes his throat close up. he cant eat peppers or onions because he has ulcers.. and we live in washington. where the main food group is sea food. we have tried mexcian, itlian, chinese, thai.. they all have served seafood. what kind of food does not have seafood in it?? i have called every resturant intown asking if they have seafood before. i need help thinking of atleast a type of food that wouldnt serve seafood. any help thanks tons

Unfortunately, there isn't really any "group" of resturants that doesn't serve seafood. My advice to you is to either eat at home (Which has the potential to be just as romatic, if not more so, as eating out), or consider attending a very upscale resturant, where you're more likely to have special instructions pertaining to allergies followed--but chances are you'll be paying more.

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