about

I'm a 19 yr old mainly agnostic ex philosophy student with rather strong views about a lot of things. I'm very liberal, love the diversity I live in in London and hate that America hasn't separated church from state.
I'm engaged to the love of my life, but agree it is a little bizarre to get engaged at 18.
I'm confident, quite literally crazy, caring and crippled. My manual wheelchair is called Sebastian and he gets scared when he goes too fast, my electric is called Jermaine (after the Flight of the Conchords character) and he really does not like ice.
I can read Braille and I know basic sign language because I believe everyone should be given equal chances. I dislike it that money doesn't have Braille on it.
I'll do my best to help out with your situations, I've been in and seen many a family conflict, I've had my fair share or love life crises, I've had about every illness known to man (could tell you a lot of amusing stories about psychiatric wards) and I'm "The Queen of Hair Dye" so hopefully I'll have some idea about advice. If it looks like I don't give lots of advice, it's because I only advise on things I know about. I also detest poor spelling and grammar so although having dyslexia makes me a bit hypocritical about this.

advice

hey. i don't have time to buy a photo album and print all my pictures and organize them. I just want a program that i can tinker and just save my images into my pc or into a dvd for easy replay or viewing.. what's the best and free program out there?

Picasa, its a google editing and organising programe, its free and can be downloaded here: https://www.google.com/accounts/ServiceLogin?hl=en_US&continue=http%3A%2F%2Fpicasaweb.google.co.uk%2Flh%2Flogin%3Fcontinue%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fpicasaweb.google.co.uk%252Fhome%253Fhl%253Den%2526tab%253Dwq&service=lh2<mpl=gp&passive=true
Click download Picasa 3.
Hope that helps!

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since 8th grade i have been shaving my vagina, (the entire thing) but recently i have noticed that after each time i shave the hair is growing upward and my pubic hair is getting higher and higher. getting it waxed would be painful, so its my last resort, i also dont know if it would help with my current situation. does anyone have any ideas of what i can do so my pubic hair doesnt grow higher?

Shaving your hair, contrary to public oppinion does not change the growth of the hair you are shaving, as it has no effect on the root growth.
Shaving will not make your hair grow higher up, puberty will do this though and its this that is making your hair grow higher, not shaving.
So don't worry, it'll stop growing up at some point, and shave to your hearts content.

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Hey everyone im a girl, i had blackish brown hair, then i bleached it. Now it strawberry blonde and light brown. I wanna be light light blonde. Will bleaching it another time make it very light?

Yes it should go light blonde, but it may need to be bleached twice more to get it as light as you want. I would say it might not be a good idea though as its then nearly impossible to deal with roots. If you are dead set on having light blonde hair, I would suggest going to a hair dresser.
If you dont want to go to a hair dresser, it should be possible to do it at home, I'd bleach it again but leave the dye in for 5 minutes more than it says to leave it for. Only five minutes though.
When that's done, wash and dry it, leave it a few days and then bleach it again if its not blonde enough. Its important to leave it to let the natural oils build again and protect and moisturise your hair. Also if you do this, get a very good conditioner and leave it on for about 10 minutes, this should help to keep some life in your hair.
Good luck!

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A few years ago I had a burst appendix and had to have an emergency surgery. The surgeon explained that there was an infection- he used a small camera/tube method to perform the surgery. Not long after, I was told to closely monitor my periods, which have been regular since then.

I am a bit worried that this could lead to infertility, caused by scar tissue, etc.. How common is that? Any thoughts are appreciated.

With the keyhole surgery there is very little scarring, which is why it is used. The infected parts of the appendix would have been cleared and im sure you must have been given antibiotics after the opperation. This will almost certainly mean there are no lasting effects from having had this, the only problem with infections comes when you can't control them, but as this one was dealt with, I'm pretty certain you'll be fine.
Two of my friends have had their appendixes burst, and neither of them have been told of any possible side effects like that, and that was both with open surgery, which has much more scarring. I've had my appendix out too and it has not even been suggested that it might be a possible side effect. Plus if your periods have been regular, I should think there is no reason to worry about being infertile.
Hope that helps! xx

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ok im 14/f and lately like the past 2 or 3 months ive had like this nasty witeish/clear stuff coming out my vag. and like its not discharge or anything well it might be but it comes out like a lot like not just a little a lot my periods are still regular and stuff but it got really bad after i was fingered i havent been figured since this started happening cuz im afraid its gonna get all over the guy. im still a vrigin? does anyone no whats wrong? and should i tell my mom?

It's discharge, don't worry. When a woman gets excited she produces more discharge, natures lubricant.
You are still a virgin if you haven't had sex. And most guys find it a turn on to be very wet, it means they're doing something well!
I don't think theres anything wrong, but if you are still concerned, you could speak to your mum, but I shouldnt be worried. It's perfectly normal!

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I want to try out for my first school talent show, But I cant find a good song to sing!!!!! I only have 3 preferences, which are not taylor swift, not colbie caillat and not a male song. Other than that Im open to Ideas! :) oh, and I am STRONGLY an alto, so I could use a low ranged song. Thanks!

Thanks for writing this, its just made me think about all the tunes I love singing and sing them again :)
The best ones for altos I think are:
Big Spender - Shirley Bassey
These boots are made for walking - Nancy Sinatra
Sunny or Son of a Preacher Man - both Dusty Springfield.
Hope you like them as much as I do and you win!

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I have a problem! I love to organize, but don't have good ideas- but the big problem is that I hate to clean, and the term 'can't see the floor' REALLY applies to my room- and I can't find anything! I tried the 'put everything in a giant pile and attack the pile' but when I see the pile I get overwhelmed, push it to my floor, and it stays there. I hate it! I love being clean, but I just can't get there! So I need:

A) Organizing Ideas (I enjoy it, remember!)
B) HOW THE HECK SHOULD I CLEAN MY ROOM??!!!!!

Thanks, and I KNOW ITS WEIRD!!!

Don't try to move the pile, what I do, is i sit in a corner of my room and put things that are on the floor there into plastic bags, sorted by where they need to go, for example one would be rubbish, one would be things for my desk and above it, and one would be for my dressing table etc. that way when you give up, you don't go back to square one cos the sorting is still done, then you can take that bag over to where it needs to be put away and do that, then another bag, then do the whole proccess again. Its good cos you can take as long as you want with it and usually by looking in the bags you can tell which they are.
As for organising ideas, if you have lots of bits and bobs, sort them into similar things and put them in glass jars. I have all my nail varnishes in a giant jar, you could put pens in, or hair ribbons/bands in another etc.
If you have a lot of jewellary, get a simple wall decoration or even just a wall bracket, and you can hang things in order of length or just round it, thats what i do round my light above my dressing table and its really useful cos then i can find the necklace I want at a glance.

Hope that helps!

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after my boyfriend stuck it in my butt. nasty creamy white liquid came pouring out my anus.
IM SCARED AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO! HELPPPP!

SOS!

I'm almost certain this'll be cum/semen, he probably ejaculated while in your butt and then it leaked out.
Don't worry, although i'm worried that you're old enough to be having anal sex, but not to know about the basic principles of sex.

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I need to put together a collection of poems and I chose to do mine on fairy tales, and how they need a reality check. I'm looking for poems that are funny, sarcastic, and illustrate the ridiculousness of fairytales. All poems MUST BE PUBLISHED, so no original work. Thanks!

This is an example of what I'm looking for.

I am thinking of a fairy tale,
Cinder Elephant,
Sleeping Tubby,
Snow Weight,
where the princess is not
anorexic, wasp-waisted,
flinging herself down the stairs.

I am thinking of a fairy tale,
Hansel and Great,
Repoundsel,
Bounty and the Beast,
where the beauty
has a pillowed breast,
and fingers plump as sausage.

I am thinking of a fairy tale
that is not yet written,
for a teller not yet born,
for a listener not yet conceived,
for a world not yet won,
where everything round is good:
the sun, wheels, cookies, and the princess.

Try Roald Dahl's revolting rhymes. It's traditional fairy tales told in a more tongue in cheek way.

http://oldpoetry.com/opoem/55895-Roald-Dahl-Cinderella

http://oldpoetry.com/opoem/61674-Roald-Dahl-Mary--Mary--quite-contrary

Theres a few on there, or the book can be bought from amazon

Hope that helps!

Why does that get a one ehy? That's exactly what you've asked for.

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What are some funny ways to evade a question you really don't want to answer when all eyes are on you?

Sarcasm and lots of it.
I remember when I didn't pass my cambridge interview, not wanting to go into the reasons about drugs,morphine and general joints, i just said "Nahhh they couldn't handle my overwhelming genius" when asked if I got in.
Works like a charm

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I am a female college student, and I've been keeping my hair long because I am majoring in theatre, and I assume it's the best thing for acting in plays. However, I've always loved having my hair short. It's the most flattering way I could wear my hair, and I love that it's easier to fix. Plus my hair is really frizzy, so when it's long it's really tough to manage. It isn't as if I want to be a professional actor, but I might want to go to grad school in the future for a master's degree. I'm a junior right now. As superficial as it sounds, I feel like cute short haircuts are like a signature for me and I feel like a part of my personality is missing. On the other hand, I like the versatility that long hair gives me as far as acting goes. Should I cut my hair?

Cut it.
If it makes you feel more like you, cut it. As far as the acting goes, use wigs. You can get cheap, natural looking wigs easily now. I can't style my hair due to joint problems and i wear wigs all the time, if the style didn't change so often, no-one'd know.
If you want short hair, go for it.

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they're saying that some plastic water bottles leach chemicals into your drink and produce more hormones. which water bottles do this? how can you tell if it will? i heard if it has the #7 on it, it will leach, is this true?
p.s.: my water bottle is a starbucks coffee one, and it doesn't have numbers on it so i can't tell.

please help!

Don't worry. It's pretty much all scare mongering.

Yes, some plastic bottles can leak some chemicals into the water they are holding but ONLY if filled with boiling water and only into that water(there is no harm through washing the bottle as long as you don't drink the washing water). There is little to no evidence that this chemical is dangerous, especially in the quantities that are released into the water. Even so, it was removed from babies bottles as a precaution as these are filled with boiling water and babies, being smaller, are more sensitive to the possible side effects of the chemical.

In conclusion, there's nothing to worry about unless you happen to be a baby or regularly filling your water bottle with boiling water, then drinking it.

Hope that's put you at ease.

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does it actually plump the lips noticably tho?

also, how much does it cost?

whats hte exact name?

Both products actually plump the lips, or I wouldnt have bothered recomending them.

"Tiger Balm" should be available at any herbal chemist or chinese medicine shop, in the UK it costs £1-£3

"Sally Hansen Lip Inflation" usually costs around £5, but can be found cheaper on the internet. Also available is "Sally Hansen Lip Inflation EXTREME" Which has more of the same effect. I haven't used the extreme version but have seen and heard great reviews.
http://www.sallyhansen.com/product.cfm?product=232 tells you about it and where you can buy it, because I don't know where you live!

Really hope that helps!

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Besides getting lip injections (too expensive, and too painful) is there any thing else i could use to plump my lips (more fuller and not so skinny)

I don't care if its just a temp. plumping where it only works for a few hours and you have to reapply or if it takes a couples days application to show up I just want something good, good results, and worth the money

(must have some type of experience with it please)

Ive got a genetic collagen disorder, collagen is the main thing which gives lips their plumpness so I know where I'm coming from.

I use lip plumping gloss, the best I have found are the sally hansen ones. They stay on for hours, great colours and aren't too expensive! It's all good!

Also if you don't want gloss, try Tiger Balm. You can get it in any chinese or ayuvedic medicine place. (don't worry, it contains no tigers! just camphor and methanol etc) it tingles and will plump lips without being a gloss, just will last slightly less long than the sally hansen stuff.

Hope it works for you as well as it does for me!

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I feel like I'm a terrible dancer. I'm like 4'11, about 95 pounds, female, and 16. Curvy, if that helps anything, too. Anyway, it seems like any time I try to move my hips or anything like that, it just looks wrong. My sisters mess with me because I can't shake my butt or anything like them. As stupid as it seems, I'm just staring to get into ballroom dancing, and I feel so stiff, even though it't not doing intense movements that require a lot of hip action.

How do I get my movements to seem more lucid, and actually look good? It seriously feels like I physically can't move like some girls can.

Its quite possible you dont physically move like some girls. Some people have genetically stiffer muscles and therefore joints. However, frequent excersize and particularly stretching will help this and give you the strength in your muscles to let you move in the way you want.
Practice, on your own, a lot. Stretch out the hips as they tighten a lot if not being used massively.
My hip muscles need a lot of stretching and these are the ones I find most helpful:
http://www.easyvigour.net.nz/fitness/h_TFL_StrSt.htm
http://www.exrx.net/Stretches/HipFlexors/KneelingHipFlexor.html
Also stand with your feet apart and bend to each side, anything that feels like its stretching something probably is.
Best to try stretching after a hot bath as your muscles are move flexible then.
Hope that helps!

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I have bright red blood in my poop....What does this mean?.

It means you're bleeding from somewhere. As it is red it means it isn't too high in the GI (gastrointestinal) tract which is less chance of being something serious. If it is on the paper, its is likely to be a skin tear in the rectum or around the anus and unlikely to be harmful, but you MUST go to your doctor as this can also be a symptom of something more serious such as bowel cancer, or stomach infections.
Your doctor will do a stool sample (you poo onto a tray then scoop a bit into a pot) to check for blood and infection, you may have to do urine and blood tests too to rule out some causes.
So overall, its most likely just to be a tear in the skin, especially if you suffer from constipation so try not to worry but do go see your doctor as soon as possible.
Hope all is well, take care xx

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I'm a girl in my early 20s.

I've suffered from depression and anxiety my whole life, but it really came to a head between 2006 and early 2008. I progressed from getting nervous in class, to being scared to go out, to being terrified of going to the grocery store across the road, to being unable to leave my house or even my room.

I failed out of school twice in this time. I lost contact with all but a small handful of my friends, and nearly lost even my family and my fiance. Fortunately, I was able to get through this alive after being hospitalized for several weeks. I took a year to get used to life and living again, and I'm feeling better than I ever have.

Here's my dilemma: I really want to start communicating with people from my past again. Thing is, most of them have no idea as to what was going on. I've tried talking to a couple of people, but they end up getting freaked out, or acting awkward.

If anybody here has similar experience in trying to rehabilitate socially after a serious battle with mental illness, I'd really appreciate your advice.

I know this is horrible for you but I'm so glad someone else knows what its like!
I would say facebook is probably the way to go, personal messages to the people you want to talk to, because that way its personal but its also giving them space to read what you're actually saying rather than freaking out and getting all confused as people tend to do about mental illness. You could always email them instead if you have their email addresses. I'd let them know what has been happening, but in short, to explain why you lost contact. Ask them what has been going on for them since you last spoke.
I did that with some people recently and its actually great the response I got, I kind of thought they'd be like "oh god its her again, I dont want to reply" but they all replied and were really chatty etc. They're probably missing you as much as you're missing them.
Good luck love, and if you want to chat to someone who's going through it too, that'd be great. xx

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I'm 21/f. I was having a fight with my boyfriend (23/m, not that it matters) the other night because he's convinced he needs to be medicated for depression - he has been before, but he isn't acting the way he did when he had to be medicated before. Out of curiosity, I looked up a checklist for ten depression symptoms just to see if I could identify the ones he's said he was feeling, and instead I identified 7/10 that I'M feeling.
* A persistent sad, anxious or "empty" mood
* Sleeping too little or sleeping too much
* Reduced appetite and weight loss or increased appetite and weight gain
* Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed
* Restlessness or irritability
* Persistent physical symptoms that don't respond to treatment
* Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
* Fatigue or loss of energy
* Feeling guilty, hopeless or worthless
* Thoughts of death or suicide

1. I'm constantly anxious - I thought it was because I have a lot on my plate, but it never seems to go away.
2. I have serious sleep problems that no one can seem to fix - my anxiety interferes with my sleep, too. I've been taking ambien for awhile in hopes that I'll eventually retrain my body (I have almost perfect sleep habits), but every time I don't take it, I wake up every 45 minutes - 1 hour, feeling like I missed an exam, and having to calm myself back down.
3. I have absolutely no appetite lately. I used to be anorexic, but I got past that. I had trouble getting 2,000 calories a day, but I got by and I was eating every 3 hours, and all that. I'm normally adamant about eating the right things at the right time, but recently I just don't get hungry, and I always feel like crap. I can see that I've lost weight.
4. I got a guitar in July. I used to play it 5 or more hours a day, and go running every day, but I have no desire to do either of those things. I also define myself as a singer, and I have no desire to sing, or write, as I also used to do constantly.
5. I can't seem to remember anything lately. I'll go to work in the morning, and by that night, I'll forget that I was at work earlier. I feel like I'm in a fog.
6. I have absolutely no energy lately. I started drinking caffeine after months of staying away from it because I felt like I was utterly incoherent without some boost. I used to be an extremely high-energy person, and I'm realizing now that all I ever want to do is lay down and do nothing.
7. I've been getting really bad headaches for months, and nothing I do, no pain pills I take, make them go away. I thought it was from PMDD (I have that too, but there's no way I'm having those issues month-long...) I also started drinking caffeine because of these. When I was anorexic, I got headaches from lack of nutrients, but these are different. When I was in high school, I slept 2.5 - 5 hours a night on purpose, and got sleep deprivation headaches, but again, these are different. I liked the way I felt when I was running on adrenaline because I never had enough "real" energy to function.

I don't feel sad, really. I don't feel worthless, I don't want to die...I'm just...tired. I dunno.
Is there a way I can combat this feeling? I have no motivation, and I miss the person I was in high school. I refuse to take medication - I have crohn's and I'm on medication for the rest of my life to begin with. I don't want any more.

Has anyone had any experience with this? =(

If you aren't sad, don't feel worthless, don't want to die then its unlikely you are suffering from clinical depression as those are the defining features of depression.
Has your crohns medication been changed recently? Because a lot of my meds interfere with my memory and motivation and that could be a reason.
While I don't think you are ill as such, I think there are ways you could help yourself not feel like this. Do more things. Go out more, do courses, volunteer, see your friends, make things, bake cakes, it doesnt really matter what, just the more you force yourself to do things, the more your body will get used to doing things and sleep better hopefully at night. Also the more you do things, the more your motivation increases. Behavioural therapy in very basic steps!
I hope I've explained myself well enough, if not, drop me a line and I will!

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i just realized something about me, haa. i sometimes forget to eat for like a day or two, and then when i eat, like even when i'm full, i keep eating. and then don't go another day or whatever until i eat again. i know thats not the greatest thing in the world to do, but is that even a disorder? i'm not doing it on purpose. i just forget to eat or something.

& then we were learning about depression in health, and i had like 4 symptoms, but i think there kinda common. like i'm always really tired, and i sleep alott. & i don't do much. & i usually don't really know what day it is ever. & i'm usually really out of it. & i have mood swings, like i'm either really happy or sad & kinda just whatever.

is that bad? or is that normal? i'm 16? i've never really noticed it before. anyone get what i'm talking about ha?

Normal almost certainly. I've always been like that with my food since I was a baby. If you aren't hungry and you don't have low blood sugar and you aren't loosing weight then I think you're fine.
However, if you are tired all the time this could be because of low blood sugar, I would suggest you try to make an effort to eat something at meal times, even if you aren't hungry, or have some smoothie or something. This will keep your energy levels up.
I don't think you've got depression, your symptoms are most likely to be symptoms of being a teenager. I've been severely depressed, but even when I was healthy I never knew what day it was. Some people just don't have a working body clock!
If you need anything else don't hesitate to drop me a line in my inbox, I know a lot about mental health! Take care! xx

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im not sure of the lyrics but its probably a popular song with the lyrics "make you happy" or "make you love me" and i dont remember the rest. ahh. i tried searching but its not by britney spears or country. its pop.

The first thing that came into my head was
What can I do - The Corrs

Hope thats it!

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