NinjaNeer's advice column

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Q: i think i have a phobia. i cant calm down before presenting stuff to the class. is there anything i can take to relax

Don't take anything. You don't want to be messed up for when you're presenting, do you?

I used to have a crippling fear of presenting. Last year I had to give a presentation in front of a class of 50 people, and I was fine.

Here's how I handle my stress:

- Be prepared. There's no reason to be frightened if you know your stuff frontwards, backwards and upside down.
- If you're allowed, bring a small cheat sheet. Nothing bigger than a cue card, and only write point-form notes. If you write full sentences, you're more likely to read from the sheet, and that makes you more aware of what you're doing. This helps because you know that if you run into trouble, you can just check out your cue card and find where you left off.
- Breathe. I usually forget to breathe, and that makes me really light-headed. Practice your speech, and make sure you practice breathing while you give it. It makes a huge difference.
- Remember that everyone has to do the same thing. It's not like you're the only one going through it. Chances are, half the class is as nervous as you are!

Above all, I'm going to reiterate my first point. DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING BEFORE YOU PRESENT! It will cloud your thinking, and reduce the quality of your presentation.

Q: whats the best way to go about learning organic chemistry?

It all depends on what level of chemistry you're going for.

The organic that they teach in high school is fairly simple; try searching e-bay for a high-school level textbook, and teach yourself from that using examples.

If it's more complex, I'd suggest self-study as well as a tutor. Some colleges offer peer tutoring services, where an upper year student helps out a lower year student for something like 10$ an hour.

Q: how long in distance/ and TIME!!!! please is ...Toronto, Ontario....to London, Ontario??? please tell me if you know its very important, mostly in time distance !!!

An addend to the other answer... just make sure that you're not travelling through the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) during rush hour: that is, between 7 and 9 in the morning, and 4 and 6 in the evening. You'll get stuck in really bad traffic.

Q: I was watching National Treasure [the movie with Nicholas Cage] in class the other day and the beginning confused me a little >.>

Who were the Freemasons and who were the Knights Templar? I googled but all I got was a fraternity group and separated information about the knights >.> Thanks you !!

Your research was right...the Freemasons are a fraternity; but not in the college sense of it. It's pretty much an organization of men who use it as a way of making connections. It's kind of like the Shriners, if you've heard of them. They have to follow a strict code of morals. Not much is known about them, because they're a secret society.

The Knights Templar were strongly involved in the Crusades.

Q: im grossed out
i hear them moaning
and like they have no respect cuz my grammas funeral is tomorrow and like
what do i do
im scared
and i feeel like
idk
i mean i know its natual but like
it sounds ugh
help

My advice; put on some loud music. Really loud. Really REALLY loud.

I know how it is! I live in a student house with 7 other people. You have no idea how many times I've heard gross noises coming from other peoples' rooms.

I'm sure they mean no disrespect to your grandmother. Sometimes sex just brings you closer to the other person, which could be something your parents need right now.

Q: how many Allegra/Allergy pills, in combination with 2 bottles of Benadryl for death?

I don't think that Allegra contains enough of anything harmful to kill you.

A normal amount of antihistamine to consume during the day is about 4-8 mg. If you exceed that amount by 3 to 5 times, you're at risk of developing toxicity.

Symptoms of a Benadryl overdose include extreme sleepiness, confusion, weakness, ringing in the ears, blurred vision, large pupils, dry mouth, flushing, fever, shaking, insomnia, hallucinations, and possibly seizures.

Death is actually very rare.

I personally would recommend NOT taking that many pills ever again. One or two should do the trick... I've been taking Benadryl my whole life for severe allergies, and it works for me.

Footnote: If you are not looking to clear up allergy symptoms, then I would add this piece of advice. There are other alternatives. Try talking to anyone on this website; you'll find us more than willing to help you through any crisis.k Nothing is worth killing yourself over. I have been in your position, and things do get better. If you need to talk to someone, leave a message in my inbox.

Q: 15/f (16 in a week, Grade Ten)

So, I'm getting older and I want more freedom. In the past I've always just lied to my parents if I wanted to go out late, but I want them to know where I am. I am responsible, I get straight A's in school and I 'never get in trouble' - or so they think.

I have never in my life asked if I'm allowed to go to parties or drink, and I'm too afraid to ask.

Should I just wait out the rest of being young, and wait until I move out to party and have fun? Why might I be so worried about asking my parents if I'm allowed to go out, anyways?

I know I'm responsible enough to handle myself (and I have on several occasions), but they still are my parents and I don't want them to worry about me. Please help, any advice is appreciated. Thanks! =)

I'd say wait. I didn't touch a sip of alcohol without my parents being around until I moved away to go to university. It doesn't mean I missed out on any fun; I had tons of fun just hanging out with my friends doing more innocent things.

Just be honest with your parents about what's happening. If you're going to a party where there's going to be drinking, promise them that you won't drink... and follow through on that promise. It'll show them that you can be trusted.

Don't worry about going partying and drinking, because it's not an essential part of being a high schooler. Enjoy your youth while you can!

Q: is there a free, downloadable program that can permanently make pictures bigger without making it look blurry? please help.

thanks.

If you increase the size of the picture, it's going to get blurry unless you use a really good camera.

The blurriness relates to the number of pixels in the picture... the more pixels, the more you can enlarge it without it becoming blurry.

Sorry, but no program can do that.

Q: my boyfriend and i have been having sex for about a month now. We use condoms and i don't want to get on birth control pills because my parents may be able to tell. is there anything else i could do to prevent pregnancy

There are other methods of birth control out there that aren't as obvious as the pill.

If you can get to a doctor once every three months, there's Depo Provera. It's an injected contraceptive, and it's actually more effective than the pill. You just get a needle once every three months, and you're set.

I would not rely on just condoms if I were you. I had a friend who recently had to have an abortion because she got pregnant while using condoms. It's really hard on a person to do something like that, and from the sounds of it, you're not old enough to deal with pregnancy.

Q: why are my fingernails yellow? shouldnt they be whtie?

As said above, smoking will cause it.

So will a vitamin deficiency, if the yellow is coming from the cuticle end.

If it's coming from the tip, are you a nail polish wearer? Apparently that may cause it too.

Q: 14/f 5'2 126 lbs, size 5

I want to get down to a size 3 in 4 weeks. I need help on dieting and excercize. So tell me what to do. Dont tell me to skip junk food and blah blah. Tell me exactly what I need to do. I need a plan that will let me have chocolate everyday. I eat dinner with my parents so fixing my dinner isnt possible. I am also a vegetarian. My problem area is my thighs so help please

Well, your plan might be a little too ambitious based on your circumstances, but here's what I would do.

It's all about reducing the calories in what you're eating, but not to an extreme. Try cutting the amount of carbohydrates you're eating. If you usually eat a lot of pasta, eat half as much. Make your sandwiches on one piece of bread instead of two.

You can have chocolate, just not as much. Try either sugar-free chocolate or very dark chocolate (the 70-80% cocoa ones). They've got less calories.

Exercise? Whatever you can do. Make sure it's mostly cardio, though, so that you're not just building muscle. Skip rope, run, speedwalk, swim... whatever you like.

Just so you know, you can't spot-reduce... the fat won't magically melt off of your thighs.

Q: Ok tonight at 6PM my friend Joan (who is thin) was having dinner with Katherine (her sister). Katherines friend Francine has terminal cancer. Any way tonight when Joan and Katherine were having dinner Joan asked; How is Francine doing;. Katherine said; Francine is down to 113 pounds and do you know what that is; Joan got upset and said; why - how much do you think I weigh; Katherine said: I am not talking about you; Joan said; but when you said that do you what that is, it is like saying you think I weigh more; They did not say anything for a while. Then Joan repeated; but when you said that do you what that is; and Katherine said; yeah do you know that is on a woman like Francine, it is all skin and bones - Francince lost three pounds in two days; And then tonight at 7PM Joan called me and told me the story and asked me if her sister thought she weighed more than 113 pounds and I said to her; no your sister does not think that - all she meant is that Francine is skin and bones. MY QUESTION: DO YOU AGREE WITH ME AND DID I GIVE THE RIGHT ANSWER: Here is what Joans sister said to Joan last week: Katherine saw Joan trying to scratch her back because Joan had a terrible itch. Katherine came over and scratched the itch on Joans back and in a teasing voice said: ech, you are so bony;

I've noticed you posting a lot with questions a lot like this.

"Joan" needs to grow up, and stop thinking that the world revolves around her. "Katherine" was trying to discuss a serious issue, and "Joan" took it and made it into an adolescent argument.

Weight really isn't that important of an issue.

I'd advise "Joan" to stop thinking so much about her weight, and start thinking about other people.

Q: what are the best lubricants, and also flavored lubes, for oral?

I'm a huge fan of Jo. I have their water-based and cherry flavoured lubricants, and both my boyfriend and I love it.

Q: my bf and i are planning on having sex for the first time soon, and i was wondering what the best brand of condoms are?

thanks

I'm going to argue with everyone here...

Trojans are pretty thick, and they're built really small.

I myself prefer Durex Sensi-Thin.

Just don't get Lifestyles, and don't get anything that's ribbed or studded, or 'for her pleasure', because a) you generally can't feel it after a little while and b) it really decreases the sensation for the guy.

Q: I don't know if this is the right category but here goes:

I am NOT pregnant.

I want to write a book writing about a teenage girl [15 or 16] that is pregnant and perhaps gets kicked out of her house. She's going to keep the baby, though.

But the information online just give the trite symptoms and things. What I would like to know are:
*Personal experience stories about being pregnant [teen or adult]
*How it affected you mentally, emotionally, and physically.
*How it affected the people around you [from the affected or the pregnant person'a point of view].
*What went through your mind when you found out you were pregnant.
*How you made the decision you made [adoption, abortion, keep the baby].
*What happened with the dad of the baby.
*What are the bads and goods?
*How did your daily schedule change?

I would just like to know things that are not able to be found easily online. I know this is really nosey and long but I would truly make this realistic. No, you don't have to answer all the questions. Anything would very much help =)

Thanks!!!

I don't have a direct personal experience, but my mom and dad were pretty young when they had me.

My parents went to the same university. They were 19 and 20 when I was born, but they had been dating for a year and a half, and engaged for a year and a half after that. At about 7 months, my mom found out that she was pregnant, so she really didn't have much time to adjust.

Apparently, she was really worried about what my dad would say, but when she told him he was ecstatic. Her father pretty much disowned her (and still doesn't like me!), but her mother and my dad's mom (his father was dead at that point) were really happy for her.

She did have to make a decision, though. Being students, my parents had a really low income, just enough to support them. My mom said that she couldn't do an abortion, but she considered adoption. She said what stopped her from giving me up for adoption was thinking "Every time I go by a playground, I'm going to wonder which one is mine."

She and my dad got married the month before I was born... and they're still happily together, 20 years later!

I hope I helped a little bit.

Q: my best friend's mom forces her to earn her own money for clothes... she's 13. She has a job that doesn't pay her that well- and she feels that it's unfair for her mom to not help her buy clothes.

Any suggestions on how to get her mom to change would be great. thanks

I think it's very fair for her mom to do that. My parents made me buy my own clothes since I got my first job (earning 6.40$ CDN an hour shelving books at the library) at 13.

Why is it fair, you might ask?

- Too many teens are unnecessarily obsessed with brand names. It'll teach her that you can get cute clothes that aren't brand name.
- It teaches financial responsibility. She'll appreciate the clothes a lot more when it's her time and money going into them.
- It helps with decision making. Do you get the 30$ t-shirt from Abercrombie, or two shirts from Target? Or save up for a new MP3 player? It's up to her.

This is an important step in growing up, this whole financial responsibility thing. Try not to think of it as punishment; rather, her parents trying to help her learn to make wise financial decisions. It's an important skill to have once you leave home!

Q: Okay so this may sound strange but i need to ask.

Im white and NOT racist whatsoever. But whenever im describing a person to someone its easy to say he/she is black or white.

But when i say someones black, a part of me inside feels like im sounding racist. Im not sure what to call African Americans in a non-racist nice way.

I will take any anwsers but anwsers from any thats african american would be nice.

Whatever you do, don't go using the term African-American indiscriminately.

Actually, most of the black people I know are from Trinidad!

Black is perfectly acceptable.

Q: can ammonia on a rag when put on someones face make you pass out?

It won't make you pass out so much as burn your nostrils and lungs. I've worked with ammonia in chemistry class, and it's really strong.

Don't do it, to yourself, or anyone else.

Q: 14/f and failing math.

How do you completely factor problems such as :

x^4+2x^3+x+2

4x^2+1

16x^2-49

24x^2-30

the caret (^) means to the power of 2 or 3 or 4, whatever single digit number comes after it.

I didn't pass this last test, and no matter how many times it's explained to me i don't understand. What would the answers be? Does anyone know any helpful websites that may be of assistance? Thank you.

I'm a second year technology student in university, so I've taken tons of math... if you ever need help with math, let me know!

However, I'm a little rusty on factoring. You don't use the tricky stuff all too much in the future (YAY!), but here's one I could provide a detailed answer for.

Third one...

16x^2 - 49

If you look carefully, you can see that this is a difference of squares situation. Both of the terms have square roots.

This means that we can do this;

(4x + ) (4x - )

When the two terms are multiplied, you'll have 16x^2 minus something (which is what we want).

Now, we just have to figure out what the root of the last term is. sqrt(49) is 7, right? So we just plug that into the blanks.

(4x + 7) (4x - 7)

If you multiply it back out, you'll see that it works.

Q: I'm trying to broaden my horizons and find some Metal bands that appeal to me.From what I've heard it all sounds too similar and the singers always sounds like they're being savagely raped and/or having their balls slammed between a door.The closest I can get is doomy stuff like Black Sabbath and whatnot.

Here are a couple that I love that are a little out there. I've got eclectic tastes, so I can sympathize with not liking a lot of metal. I've included some links so you can have a listen.

Opeth is a death metal band. Their lyrics are beautiful, almost like poetry. Their vocal style is that death metal kind of roaring, but with really nice singing mixed in. I love them, and I'm not a metal person.
One of their less metally songs... great voice!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxaFANthouM
Something more hardcore (live, so it sounds a little different from usual):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHyauYvk1h4

Apocalyptica is another neat one (from Finland). They do their metal using cellos. They actually do remakes of a lot of Metallica. Pretty neat.
Enter Sandman:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tN6_1dJveM
I think this is one of their own... "Quutamo"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFW7oTEqKgc

Rammstein is really fun. They're German, so the music is, needless to say, not in English. Terribly catchy, though.
My personal favourite by them:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PMP8wnouWk

Hope I helped out a little.

bio

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.