I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
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I'm giving a speech tomorrow, and it's about "my basketball court" now ive wriiten everything im going to say - EXCEPT the introuction!
which, according to my teacher, is super important!
With that said, here comes my question..
I don't want to say "hey my name is.. and im going to talk about my basketball court" i want a fun way of introducing my speech!
something about the actual game, BASKETBALL, or the basketball court..
I know this is a total challenge for you,
but you're totally a good writer..so thats why im asking.
So thank you - you are truly amazing if you help me with this.
I've been brainstorming but it's not coming to me!
thank you so much :)
for any ideas AT ALL about introducing my speech. (link)
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Oh goodness!! Well, thank you very much first of all....I don't know if I can be much help if I am honest because I really don't know much about basketball.
When I was at school and we had to write some speeches for our exams and there were a few pointers we were given.
Metaphores. In the speech I gave, my opening line was "I will not address you today as people, or as students but as closed books, with secrets locked deep inside." Give the audience something to think about.
Alliteration. This is a great tool when giving speeches. Let me give you an example... "It was a nice evening for a barbecue but Peter prefers his peas."
Now, I forget what the other thing is called but basically, you write something like this "The air that night was wonderful; warm, light, comforting. Almost like listing a description of something but putting in an extra comma instead of 'and'. Another example; "He was the sort of person you could love. Positive, friendly, kind to everyone but he had one flaw."
Here's my idea......
Greet everyone first then go into it like this...
"It's a beautiful hot summers day. You can taste the air, feel it, smell it. You're outside on the asphalt, heart pumping with adrenaline while you stand inside the white lines, staring at the net before you. The crowd is watching, waiting with baited breath for you to miss, for you to score, for you to take the shot. Waiting.....
Moments like this are what make basketball the popular game it is today."
Then go into the rest of the speech.
I don't know if that's the sort of thing you're looking for. I hope it is and if it isn't, I hope you can use something from it!
Break a leg and let me know how it goes.
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ok well my best friend moved away and we have been getting into alot of fights and like we used to never fight and now she thinks i won't stand up for her and stuff like that and now shes says were not best friends anymore we are just friends and she wants me to prove to her that we are best friends by tellng her and stuff but i can't impress her shes just so hard to impress.
What do i do?
HELP FAST
Thanx (link)
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I understand what you're saying and that you want to be best friend with this girl but...why do you want to be best friends with someone who puts all the effort on you and makes you feel like you aren't worthy of her friendship?
I had a best friend right the way up through school but it was never about impressing each other because it was a mutual friendship. We got together and hung out, went shopping, made up games, played on her Sega, made mini films and TV shows on her video camera......fun stuff. We were on equal footing and would never have dreamed of making each other feel inferior.
If this girl is demanding that you prove your friendship to her, then you need to ask yourself how come she has nothing to prove?? What makes her so special? If you ask me, the very fact she is treating you this way tells me that you deserve a much better friend and you should get out there and find them!
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Okay.
Im not skinny.
But im not fat.
And i think that the fact that im not 100 pounds is keeping guys from being interested in me.
I mean..i am confident..but i never have the courage to talk to them...even if they SEEM interested...i dont know what to do because with my friends..i have confidence..but in school im not always with my friends..so i get really, really shy...any advice?
thnx (link)
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It sounds to me that the most likely reason for guys not being interested in you is your lack of self confidence.
If you look at all the girls at your school who walk around with boys on their arms, you will probably find that they come in all shapes and sizes but they have one thing in common.....they all have confidence.
You can tell from the way a person walks, the way they hold themselves, the way they talk to other people, even the way they stand still, that they have confidence. That being said, the chances are that inside, they are probably all just as shy as you are.
It's one thing to act confidence and another to feel it but usually one comes from the other so I'll give you some tips. When you walk, don't look at the ground. Look straight ahead or slightly to the side. Meet people's eyes as you walk along and if someone looks you in the eyes, smile at them. Yes, it will feel horribley awkward the first few times but flash people a big old smile and you'll find it gets returned soon enough. Best of all, people will think you are an approachable person so you will find in time that people start to talk to you more.
When you stand, stand with your head parallel to the floor, arms loose by your side or in any other position except crossed in front of your chest. This SCREAMS "Go away and leave me alone!!"
Lastly, when you talk to people, any people, look them in the eye. Very difficult to do at first because it makes you feel so awkward but it enables you to connect with people as they are talking and lets them know you hear them. Don't stare them in the eye for a long length of time and divert your eyes frm time to time but make sure you keep coming back to their eyes.
It really isn't your weight that is the problem. There are so many girls out there that think "I could get a boyfriend if I was a little thinner/taller/shorter/smarter/had blonde hair/etc" but the truth is, there are men out there who will love you no matter what you look like. It's your confidence and personality that will win them over.
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let me say you have sex with a girl and then she tells you she is a virgin and you do it but she produces no blood lose does that mean she aint a virgin (link)
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No, it doesn't mean that. The reason many women bleed when they have sex for the first time is that penetration breaks the hymen, which is inside the vagina. Although many women have their hymen broken by having sex for the first time, it can also be broken by doing activities such as horse riding, trampolining and gymnastics. It is also often broken by the use of tampons.
I'm afraid if you would like to know if a girl is a virgin, the only way you will be able to find out is if she says so and you cn trust her to be honest with you.
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I really miss my ex, we went out for at least a month and I think he is starting to want me back to because he is now flirting with me again, but I also really have some feeling for this other guy and he is a year older than me but that doesn't really matter but should i go back and give the guy who broke my heart a second chance or move on and get with this other guy i really like also. so confused, plz help (link)
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It really depends on what this ex of yours did that broke your heart. If, for example, he just wasn't a perfect boyfriend, didn't call when he said he would, acted a bit of a lad around his friends and so on, then if you really like him you could give it another try.
If, on the other hand, your ex did something truly awful; if he cheated on you, stole from you, abused you or your trust in any way or was just downright horrible to you on purpose, don't look back and set your sights on this new guy in your life.
Put it this way, until we meet 'The One', I truly believe that all other relationships are there to teach us something. Think about your relationship with your ex and what you could have learned from it. If it was that he didn't know how to be a real boyfriend, it isn't worth it.
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hi! first of all, i want to thank you for the advice you gave me..
now, the crush "blues" are gone.. we're getting closer everyday.. earlier today, we had fun moments and lots of laughs. iT's just so frustrating because he has everything i want in a guy but he still have feelings for his ex-girlfriend. Their relationship ended last year. Now should be the right time for him to move right? coz it's been so long and the Ex had moved on already. Should i keep him? What should i do to help him get over the GIRL and let him realize that i am just here! right infront of him!.... (link)
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I'm very sorry, but I don't know which question you're referring to. However, I will try to answer as best I can based on the information you have given.
Unfortunately, there isn't a lot that you can do to help him get over his ex. I'm sorry, I wish I could be more helpful but the truth is, some people take longer to get over exes that others. It depends on how much they felt for them and how long they were together, as well as how sensitive and emotionally involved they were in the relationship.
Has he told you he still has feelings for his ex? If so, I think maybe you need to talk to him about it and just lay the truth of the situation out the way you have with me. Explain to him that you know he cares about her still but he has to stop moping about it and move on with his life or he's going to miss great opportunities with other girls that will care about him without even realising it.
With any luck, that will lead to a comment like "Oh yeah, and who's gonna want to go out with me?", at which point you can leap in with the old "I would" and see what happens.
If he really can't let his feelings for this girl go, it's up to you whether you want to risk trying to sustain a relationship with him or try to move on while he works on getting over his ex. Personally I would recommend the latter, as relationships are hard enough without the emotional baggage but I would still recommend, whatever you do, that you tell him how you feel and let him decide from there whether he is ready to move on.
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Me and my boyfriend have been together a month, and everything between us is wonderful. There's only one thing that's bugging me. When we have sex, I can't seem to get him to orgasm very much at all. He hasn't said anything about it, but it bugs me. Any tips? (link)
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You need to work together on this. It may be that there's something psychological that is causing him some problems and not allowing him to let go properly or it could be that he just doesn't experience strong orgasms.
The best recommendation I can make is that you talk the problem over with him and work out whether he feels satisfied or not. If he feels things can be better, get him to tell you what he likes, how he likes it and for how long.
This is actually the secret to great sex. It's working together to find out what feels best. Don't give up or worry too much about it. Just talk to him and find out what you could both do. Whether it's different positions or something else, you will get there with a little verbal communication.
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Okay, well i was dating this boy Andrew for about 11 months and then when we hit high school he told me another girl was hotter than me and i always brought it up and i'd say stuff like "hey look there she is" and it really mad him upset i guess. but he obviously didn't understand that it made me even more upset and he ended up dumping me because i was "always on his case" about it but i never would have been on his case if he didnt give me a reason to be.. and then he asked out another girl to the movies like 3 days after he dumped me (not the one he thought was hotter than me) and then at our town fair we worked things out and he told me that he still loved me but didnt wanna be with me and we ended up making out and stuff and for about a week he treated me like his girlfriend still and now i'm realizing that i just want to get over him because i'm being tied down to somebody that isnt even my boyfriend anymore, yet he still goes and hangs with other girls and goes out with other girls but when i do that with other boys i feel so guilty.. and at school and stuff i'm so tempted to hold his hand and he sits with me at lunch and we talk on the phone before i go to bed.. and my friend has already been through everything i'm going through and shes like "just put your guards up and don't let him see you hurt" but its not that easy but does anybody have any advice about how to get over thiss boy?
Pleasee & Thank youss! (link)
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As long as this guy continues to treat you like a semi-girlfriend you won't be able to get over him. He's keeping you sweet, while going off with other girls and clearly, from what you have said, you have more loyalty towards him than he does to you.
See, the problem is that he broke an unwritten but fairly well known rule. When you are dating someone, no matter what they look like, NOBODY is more attractive than them. End of story. If my partner told me he thought someone was prettier than me, I'd be hurt too. Of course I would! Anyone would! Okay, peraps you didn't handle it the best possibly way but the fact is, most people would react the same way and it isn't an unfounded response.
If you really want to get over him, you need to tell him that he can't keep treating you the way that he is. No more late night calls, no more kissing and no more confessions of love. If he wants to be with you, then fine, he can be but if he doesn't then it needs to stop so that you have the freedom to get over him and move on because you still have feelings for him. Chances are, he will probably act as though you are being unreasonable in saying this. You're not. You can't get over someone who is always in the picture, telling you that they care about you but at the same time, being with other women.
Unfortunately, after this it's all down to you and time. Shut yourself away in your room for a weekend with a box of kleenex and a week's supply of Haagen Dazs or Ben and Jerry's and eat and cry until you have nothing left. After that, it's time to move on so go out with friends and tell them they aren't to talk about him. Go shopping, go for a meal or to the cinema. Anything that means you will have fun.
It will take time but you will get over him and find someone who will truly care about you and treat you as you deserve to be treated.
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i like this guy right i'm a little mad at him though NE way i also met some new friends and one of the girls likes him too and her/my friends trying to hook them up but i like him too and i don't wanna be rude and not let them get with eachother but he doesn't even know her he knows me i have all my classes with him and i really think he likes me too because the way he acts.
what should i do help please.
-KikiJ (15/f) (link)
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Well you have two choices here...
You can swoop in, tell this guy that you like him and see if he will go out with you. Doing this means he will be yours if he feels the same way but at what price? You will have the guy that you like and although you shouldn't always care what other people think, you would need to be prepared for the slating you would get from your friends, this girl and her friends for moving in on a man that you know was already marked as her potential.
The alternative (and the one I would recommend) is to leave things as they are for now. I know it's not favourable because you don't want to see this guy going out with another girl but look at it this way, if he turns her down, you are free to make your move because he wasn't interested in her. If they go out now, they will most likely break up at some point and again, after a short time has passed, you will be able to make your move without fear of guilt.
Ultimately it is your choice and nobody can make it for you but you may need to just step aside for now, so you don't look like a bad person and can have him when he's free and you aren't likely to suffer for it.
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if i put my straightner on a higher temperature, will my hair stay straighter for longer? because it straightens fast so im not sure if itll make it straighter longer (link)
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No, unfortunately, as has already been said it will just burn the hair. You have to remember that hair is actually very delicate.
If you want it to stay straight for a longer period of time, the best thing you can do is try a serum (preferabley a heat activated straightening one, such as Sunsilk Straight (it's a bluish purple coloured tube) or a mousse with firm or extra firm hold. Most products of this type also help to protect the hair against damage as well, which is an added bonus.
If you don't want to use a serum or mousse, the only other option I can recommend is a firm hold hairspray. You don't have to use a lot or make it sticky. Spray some onto the comb (use a comb, not a hairbrush as a hairbrush could give your hair a static effect) and then lightly comb it through your hair. Do it a couple of times and it should help to hold your hair straight for longer.
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Okay, so the other day I (stupidly) asked my boyfriend if I was a good kisser or not.
His answer? 'Your kisses are animalistic and primal' which I'm thinkin' is good, right?
Then he said, 'It's much more visceral kissing you comapred to other girls I've been with.....'
Ummmmm - WTF?! I've got no idea what that means!
Is that a good thing? Does he like kissing me?
I'z confused! Please help!:) (link)
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Taken from the Oxford English Dictionary:
Visceral. adj. 1 relating to the body's internal organs. 2 relating to deep inward feelings rather than to the intellect.
From this, I would draw that he is saying kissing you brings out internal stirrings in him (of the good kind). So yes, it does sound as though he likes kissing you a lot!
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18/f
I've only been dating my guy for a few weeks but we've had a strong connection ever since we met. Whether it is conversationally, emotionally, or physically, we've just always been in the same place.
Well, i've recently noticed a change in our relationship (I know it's only been a few weeks but like I said, it seems like we're in a pretty serious relationship). Before we officially started dating, and even for a while after, we'd have amazing conversations on various things. Everything from parents to politics to the school system to sex. I told him how I quit cheerleading, about my relationship with my family (we're really close), friends, and just so many things that I usually don't tell people right away. He did the same and we'd talk about things for hours.
Now it seems like he's so...distant. Like, I can't tell him anything anymore. All he talks about is sex and his car. And since I feel that I can't tell him or talk to him right now, I don't so I get the feeling that he thinks I'm becoming distant.
But how can I help it? Last night I was on the phone with him and I guess I sounded upset so he asked me what was the matter and I told him that my parents were in a big fight and I just really hate when they're mad at each other. All he said to me was, "Oh, yeah, I don't think I've ever heard my parents argue." Then he said he had to get something to eat and would talk to me later.
Usually, he would have talked to me about it or at least have told me that it would pass over and not to worry too much. Why would he tell me that he's never heard his parents argue? So, I don't know, can you see why I'm kind of upset?
I don't know whether I should talk to him or what because if I do bring up the subject, I doubt that he'll actually talk to me about it. All he's cared about lately is sex and his car so I don't even know right now. Any help?
(link)
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Don't worry, I know exactly how you feel. You go through that stage in a relationship where everything feels absoloutely perfect and you can't imagine anything better...and then it all goes downhill and suddenly, you're left wondering "What happened??"
The truth is there are a huge nunmber of possibilities as to what has happened. Maybe he feels he's run out of topics to talk about. Maybe there's something playing on his mind right now that he can't talk about. Maybe nothing has really changed deliberately but he's comfortable and therefore feels the need to talk about things less. Maybe (sorry for saying this) the relationship has run its course as far as he is concerned.
The point I'm making is that although you say you feel you can't talk to him right now, you won't know what is going on until you do. I suspect you have considered already that he may have lost interest in the relationship and you don't want to be confronted with this as the truth. I can understand your feelings about this but at the same time, is it really better to go on the way you are and not knowing what is happening?
It's a hard step to have to take but relationships NEED communication to survive and unless you can get him to talk about what is going on with him, the relationship is going nowhere, especially if his behaviour is making you distance yourself from him in return.
Have a chat with him. Regardless of what he says, it's better than not knowing. You need to know where you stand. Take a deep breath and go for it. At this stage, it really is the best thing to do.
I hope it all works out for you.
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My goodnesss. Ochies so I broke a tiny piece off form the corner of a cpu and i glued it with super glue. That's not the prob though. I got super glue all over my figners! AHH. I can't get it off. I tried warm water and soap. Finger nail polish. And it still wont come off.
Are there ANY other ways? If not, how logn will it take the SUPER SUPER glue to come off?!?! (link)
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Paint thinner (white spirit) is also very good. Dab some on with a sponge or a cloth and you should find it starts to come off.
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My boyfriend and I have been dating a while. I love him A LOT!! and I like my best guy friend. Well me and him like eachother.. and we madeout in like May and I was dating my bf and I Felt SOOO bad about it!! I swore that I wouldnt do it again and got over it and try not to think about it so i dont tell my boyfriend, and my bf never found out. Now today I did it again.. and I did the same cycle I said I'd never do it again but I feel so tempted by him and its not like I'm having sex with him.. I mean I wouldnt want my boyfriend making out with another girl so its considered cheating but I dont even want a girl to talk to him so is it actually cheating???!!!AND IM NOT GOING TO TELL MY BOYFRIEND!!... because all trust would be lost. and if you dont have trust you dont have a relationship What should I do to keep faithful?! I need help I feel so bad. This guy does everything for me and all i can seem to do is disrespect him.. and NO IM NOT GOING TO BREAK UP WITH HIM. so please do not say that, that will not help me at all!! I wish I can take it back but i cant. Like me and my best friend walk home together and its not in a city its on a desserted road.. soo im not scared enough for my boyfriend to find out to stop it!! I'm sorry if this is confusing I'm just really upset!! PLEASE HELP ME. (link)
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I understand your upset and you feel guilty for what you did, but aren't you just making the situation worse by trying to deny it happened?
Look at it this way. You say you love your boyfriend. If you love him then why can't you be faithful? Maybe you care about him a lot but that's not love. Love is what keeps you from cheating on someone, because you know that there is nobody else you would rather be with.
You also say that a relationship without trust is nothing, but you haven't given him any reason to trust you. You have cheated on him twice with someone who he probably already saw as a threat to your relationship. Twice. Do you really deserve his trust? Say you stay together and end up getting married. Can you really keep him in the dark about this forever? Can you guarantee it won't happen again?
You can't say that you won't tell your boyfriend and then say you won't end it because you're forcing me to say that you should keep it all a secret from him and try to learn to live with the guilt of your betrayal but I'm sorry, I can't do that. The fact is, if you want to have a real relationship with this guy, you can't cheat on him and then lie about it. Omitting the truth is every bit as bad as telling a lie.
I'm sorry. I know it isn't what you want to hear and you have my sympathies for the difficult situation you are in but you need to make a decision here and it's not one that anyone here can make for you. You could tell your boyfriend and face the consequences or end it with him (or at least take a break) while you try to figure out the feelings you obviously have towards your best friend. If he is the one who keeps leading you astray then you should either be with him or avoid him like the plague. You cannot have your cake and eat it too because it is incredibley unfair to both your best friend and you boyfriend. For the sake of all involved, you need to decide who you want, once and for all.
Personally, I would strongly recommend that you take the break from the relationship with your boyfriend and try to work out what is going on between you and your best friend. There are feelings there that you have so far been unable to deny and you both owe it to yourselves to work out if you really could have something.
Like I said, I know it isn't what you wanted to hear and I'm sorry, but I really hope you take my advice and try to sort it all out. If you don't, there's a high risk it could get worse and then you will hate it even more if it blows up in your face.
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Alexis is a very good friend of mine, however she's horrible unself-confident. She tells me all the time she wants a boyfriend like mine or a body like mine and it makes me very uncomfortable. She always complains shes ugly, fat, and she can't get a boyfriend.
She CONSTANTLY asks me if her outfit is cute, if she needs more makeup, or even if her hair is bad. It's starting to bug me, how do I tell her to stop? (link)
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Oh dear. It sounds as though your friend is suffering from a bad case of low self esteem. Unfortunately, because the problem isn't actually with you, but with her, there isn't a lot that you can do or say that can keep her from comparing herself to you.
However, what you can do is have a chat with her about her lack of self confidence and self esteem. Clearly it's a problem and it does need to be sorted, so talk to her about it and see if there are any ways you can help her to help herself.
Try explaining to her that she seems to not think very much of herself and it is upsetting to yo because you can't understand why she feels that way. Tell her that you care about her and want to help but she needs to do something about it because if she thinks she can't get a boyfriend or is overweight or unattractive but doesn't do anything about it, it just isn't going to get better. Try to phrase this in a way that doesn't imply you agree she needs to change, as any implication along this line will make things worse.
Try to suss out what the problems are and help her think of ways to fix them. If she thinks she's ugly, offer to do her a makeover, or book a free makeover at a local store. If she thinks she is overweight, help her stick to a healthy eating and exercise plan. The boyfriend will come in time but she needs to get some self confidence back. The chances are, if she truly is overweight, losing some of it might help restore some of her confidence but it's more than that. She needs to feel comfortable in her own skin, so perhaps taking up a hobby like drama would help. Something she could be good at and that builds confidence at the same time.
I know it can be irritating but be gentle with her. If she feels bad about herself, getting mad will make it worse so try to help her and reason with her. Then, if none of that works, have a serious talk with her and explain that if she isn't prepared to help herself, she has no justifiable reason to spend so much time complaining and being unhappy about it. I know that sounds harsh, hence why it is ONLY to be used as a last resort. Try to help her first. As long as she is willing to give it a try, there's no reason it shouldn't help.
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I recently had sex for the first time. I experienced a little pain and discomfort which I am assuming is normal because I am not used to penetrative sex. Will this ease up and roughly how long will this take?
I also often felt tense as every 5 mins I felt like I needed to pee. I did not have a burning sensation or any pain related to this urge to pee. It just felt like his penis was poking into my bladder! Is this normal?
Thanks (link)
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Hi there,
First of all, yes it is absoloutely normal to experience some level of discomfort when first having sex. You may find this continues for a short time before disappearing. Occasionally it lessens but does not disappear altogether but this is only occasional and you don't need to worry unless you have been having intercourse regularly for approximately 6 months without the discomfort becoming less. Unfortunately, I couldn't give you a better time scale for it to lessen within, as it differs from person to person.
The need to urinate is also normal. If you are not experiencing any pain in relation to it and if you could feel the discomfort you describe during the intercourse, it sounds as though he may have just irritated your bladder. Again, there's no real need to worry and you should find symptoms alleviate naturally in around 48 hours. However, if you begin to experience pain and/or a burning sensation, or if the increase need to urinate does not lessen or disappear 48 hours from now, you should speak to your doctor, as this could indicate a Urinary Tract Infection.
Don't worry, it is all perfectly normal and unfortunately, the less glamorous side of having a sex life!! In time you will learn your own ways to deal with these problems but to help you out, you could make sure you urinate immediately after sex, to help ensure bacteria is removed from the body before infection has time to start. In addition to this, if you find that sex can irritate your bladder as you have described, try different positions. Many women find that different positions feel better than others so the trick is to work together to find out what feels most comfortable for the both of you.
I hope that helps!
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Hi,
I recently had sex for the first time. We had penetrative sex but he did not cum inside me as he was not wearing a condom. Is is still possible to get pregnant. Also, when does someone officially lose their virginity? I was expecting bleeding but there wasn't any. There was however, a little pain and discomfort and I also often felt tense as every 5 mins I felt like I needed to pee. Is this normal? Many thanks for your help! (link)
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Firstly, and most importantly, you should ALWAYS make sure your partner is wearing a condom when having sex. Other than the risk of pregnancy, they protect against infection and disease, so next time, make sure he's wearing one.
Regardless of whether or not he climaxes inside you, when a man is aroused, he producses sperm. As long as he is inside you, yes you can get pregnant. You need to make sure you always remember that because 'pulling out' is NOT an effective method of contraception. The best thing you can do is to ensure you get put on the Pill and use condoms at the same time. This will be the best way to ensure you are protected when having sex.
Someone is considered no longer a virgin after first having sexual intercourse. Although bleeding is common after first having sex, this is caused by breaking the hymen and as the hymen can be broken by normal physical activity (sports etc), bleeding does not always occur.
The paint and discomfort you are referring to is what is known as 'Honeymoon Cystitis'. It is a bacterial infection where the urethra (the tube that carried the urine) becomes inflamed. Unfortunately, the only way to really treat this correctly is by speaking to a doctor and taking a course of antibiotics. In the meantime, however, keep drinking plenty of water to help flush out the bacteria and drink cranberry juice, which will help to neutralise the acidity in the urine, thereby calming the burning sensation.
Don't worry, it is totally normal and usually only happens from time to time.
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My sexually abusive boyfriend ripped me while trying to fist me. I told him it wouldn't fit, he doesn't listen to me protest. He did say he was sorry and that he didn't intentionally mean to hurt me. It ripped a good 2 inches long, between my labia and my clitoris. It was bleeding like crazy last night, and this morning when I went to the bathroom it is still bleeding. Should I seek medical attention? how will I explain something like this without telling them my boyfriend is sexually abusive?
Thanks (link)
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Firstly, yes you do need to seek medical attention and quickly. Other than the problems you are experiencing with bleeding, you are at risk of infection as long as the wound is open so you need to see someone as quickly as possible about this.
Secondly, and most importantly, you NEED to do something about this relationship you are in. Why are you still with a guy you know to be sexually abusive? Remaining in a relationship of this nature will only serve to do you harm in the long run and you need to ask yourself whether you want the pain you are experiencing now to be so common?
I understand that everyone has their own reasons for staying with an abusive partner but I PROMISE you that if you stay with him, things will only get worse. Please talk to someone about what is happening and get away from him. You deserve better, you should have better and you CAN have better, so get away from him, please, and find it.
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what are some symptoms of depression? the way i eat, sleep & think has changed.. i hardly get any sleep, eat a lot & dont want to really ever do anything outside of the house.. there might be an ocasion where i try & get myself happy & it works & i do go places but other than that no. (link)
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Depression can be a difficult thing to diagnose, as there are many other possible reasons for suffering the same symptoms. For this reason, I would urge that if you feel you may suffer with it, you should speak to your doctor for a formal diagnosis and treatment. However, in the meantime, some of the most common symptoms of depression are as follows:
- Feeling sad with no obvious reason
- Lack of energy
- Feelings of inadequacy
- Feeling incapable of completing minor tasks
- Periods of anxiety with no obvious cause
- Irritability and anger
- Feelings of guilt
- Overthinking and analysing the negative aspects of your life on a constant/regular basis.
Again, I would stress that these can be symptoms of other things so don't resign yourself to the idea it is depression. Also, please remember that depression can be beaten if you really want to get over it. Speak to your doctor for a diagnosis and they will be able to come up with some suggestions for dealing with the problem.
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I have been straightening my hair since December or January last year. I also highlighted it once and it was still soft and there was not any frizz. I went to get it highlighted again around April and they bleached my whole hair by accident. It finally began to look a little dried out, but only a little bit of frizz. In July I realized how ugly the color of my hair actually looked with my skin tone and eyebrows, so I tried to dye it back to my natural color at a hair place. They made it extremely dark and there was even green! So, two days later, I went to another place and they fixed it. I love the color and all, but now it is incredibly dry and it is beginning to get frizzy. I've dried the garnier fructise deep conditioning treatment, VO5 hot oil treatment, and today I tried the mayonnaise thing. Before the mayonnaise conditioning, I saw no improvement. My hair no longer looks as dried out as it did, but it is continues to look dry, frizzy, and plus I have split ends. I have stopped straightening it and I don't blow dry it. Is there any way that I can get it back to being soft and non-frizzy? Also, when my hair all grows out, will it be soft with no frizz again or will it be damaged? (link)
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I've been exactly where you are now. I had highlights and lowlights two to three times a year and straightened it twice a week for nearly two years and my hair was so dry and brittle it was getting shorter by itself.
Unfortunately, the only thing you can do is abandon the straighteners for a while. Although there are lots of shampoos and conditioners out there who promise to stop split ends etc, once the damage is done, it cannot be fixed and from there the only thing you can do is prevent the new growth from going the same way.
Try and manage without the hair straighteners. It might look unpleasent to begin with but after a week or two, it will start to look a lot better. You will begin to notice your hair feels softer in around a month or two, as long as you take care of it. Use a moisturising shampoo and Aussie 3 Minute Miracle Conditioner (best hair care product out there. I swear by it). Wash your hair twice a week, do NOT towel dry hair because this can damage it further. Dry on a medium heat setting and use something to protect against heat damage unless you use a mousse, which does this anyway.
Try to wash your hair only two-three times a week, as the more hair is washed, the worse it can get due to the stripping of natural oils from the hair.
If you're concerned about the frizz then you need to try some frizz control products until you find one that suits your hair. I eventually found that Wella Firm Hold Shock Waves Mousse, combined with SunSilk Frizz Control Cream (the green one) works well on my hair. If you want to give these a try, use the serum after lightly blow drying your hair so it is still wet but not dripping as much. Start at the scalp and massage in, as frizz control starts at the roots. Follow the instructions on the bottle for the rest of the hair. Blow dry until it is still wet but not dripping. Use a COMB to untangle any knots. Start at the bottom of the hair and work your way up. Then apply a generous amount of mousse. Comb through again and blow dry with the nozzle pointing down all the time.
I also find it helps to immediately tie my hair back in a loose pony tail after drying. I leave it like that for an hour or two and then when I take it out, my hair is full bodied, without being fluffy and has a deep wave.
Give that a try and if it doesn't work, don't lose hope. When hair has been badly damaged, it can take a while to give it back its life and as soon as your hair has grown out a bit, you will need to have it cut to get rid of some of the split ends that make it frizzy. You WILL notice a difference but it will take a couple of months at most for your hair to feel any better and I will warn you now, if you use your hair straighteners at any point, even once over the next year, it will undo everything you will be working for. It's tough but I've not touched my straighteners in nearly a year and the difference is incredible.
I really hope that you find something to work for you.
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