about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
My FAQ






Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

I’m looking for opinions on a pretty serious subject: Free Speech.

So here is the deal, I’m sure many people don’t know, but a group called Wesboro Babtist Church tried to enter Canada on Thursday, after expressing publically their intention to protest two plays (both pro-homosexual in nature, one a comedy and one drama) and to demonstrate at the funeral of a man brutally murdered in Winnipeg carrying signs like ‘God hates Canada/Fags’ and the such.

The church believes that things like this murder, are God’s way of punishing Canada for legalizing gay marriage...

Anyways, Canada didn’t let them in. Stopped them at the boarder and denied them entry.

Legally, Canada had every right to deny them, but a lot of people are crying foul, saying we should respect free-speech enough to allow them in to protest. Others are saying it’s perfectly right, since what they were intending to do was hate speech and they aren’t even our citizens anyways.

So that’s the question: Does the ideal of freedom of speech mean Canada ought to allow foreign visitors' entrance after they have expressed their intention to disrupt and possibly engage in hate speech at a funeral and two theatre festivals?

No they don't. "Free speech" doesn't mean you can go to another country and terrorize someone's funeral because of something they did with their life. There comes a point where protesting has gone to far, and when a group of people feel they have to ruin someone's funeral just to make a point- to me that's wrong.

If you want to protest, stay in OUR country and protest somewhere else. Ruining someone's funeral because you feel it's your RIGHT to protest is just rude and arrogant.

--Jack
(16/m)

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okay it has been about a week and it has felt like i have been thought my period and when i go to the bathroom there is only a little drop of white stuff do you know what it is???

Discharge. Just your body cleaning itself out. Perfectly normal.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Alright, I'm about to go crazy over this so I'm in dire need of some help and I found your advicenator site and knew you were the one to ask! (:

Ok, I'm 16/f and I've been with my boyfriend for a little over 7 months and I care for him more than I could ever imagine BUT he has been getting on my nerves a lot more than normal lately.. so here's my problem... Since April 2008 I've realllly been into this other guy. From April until the end of school (in May) I was crazy. I had 1st period with him and 5th. So I saw him everyday.
Whenever he didn't show up I would freak and wonder where he was at, and I'd always look forward to seeing him... but after school let out I tried to forget about him so I could be with my boyfriend and not feel bad about myself. It totally worked until the beginning of this past week.
School Band camp started and he was there. All of my old feelings came back and I don't want to go though this again. but oh my goodness I almost melt every time I see him... I cannot be with both and I'm not even sure how this other guy feels about me! He's so shy and doesn't talk about his feelings very much... so it's hard to bring anything up.

I just want to know what I can do or at least what I SHOULD do. I don't want to treat my boyfriend badly anymore. Also I'm sorry it's so long, I tried to break the paragraph up a little so it doesn't kill you to read. (: Ha-ha.

Anyways, thank you for your help.. if you give me any!

-Doesn't know what to do
16/f

Stay with your boyfriend. As far as I can see, he hasn't given you a reason to break it off with him. And besides, there's no guaranteeing that the other guy will even date you.

If you see him, try to avoid him. That is, unless you're going to want to be his friend WITHOUT having feelings for him.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I know this is stupid but im just 13 and have no experience...but i was wondering how do you make-out?

I know this sounds really lame, and I'm sure it is ;]

But just go with the flow. I don't really have experience in how to "properly" kiss, nor do I have experience with kissing at all! Can you say prude? ;]

Anyway- if it's your boyfriend/girlfriend- just be honest with him/her. Tell them you're nervous and you don't really know what you're doing. Apparently the people who are less-experienced is a big turn-on to some people.

Do what you feel comfortable with. If something feels awkward or uncomfortable, don't do it. If it feels right, ask the person if they are okay with that, and if they are- then you'll be fine.

There really isn't a CORRECT way to do it. Everyone does what they are comfortable with.

From my weak experience- this is what I can tell you:

1. Don't come on strong- it's really awkward for the other person.
2. Don't slobber all over the other person.
3. Don't stick your tongue all the way down their throat.


My friend on here, Laura, answered a question similar to this, and she gave a great answer. I will copy her answer, but know that credit goes to her.

www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542699

Honestly, you could read a book about it, and you'd probably forget everything once you went in for the kiss.


Explore. Do what feels right. Make it fun, playful, romantic, whatever you want it to be. Don't make it all about jamming your tongue down his throat, and try not to drool all over him, because it's generally less than desireable to do so.


If you come off as confident it'll be a lot more fun. If all evening you're thinking "Oh my gosh, this is going to be bad" you won't enjoy yourself. Follow his lead at first, if you're truly that nervous.


And really, it's almost impossible to find a truly bad kisser. If anything, they might do something you're not used to; give it a chance before you hate it. Who knows, he might be thinking the same thing right now about you!


Over time, you'll develop your own personal style of kissing/making out, and that's not a bad thing. Do whatever feels good/right to you, and gets a positive reaction. For example, some people love a gentle, or less than gentle, bite of the lip, "necking", and other techniques. Like I already said, experiment & make it fun!


From personal experience I'd advise that you brush your teeth and floss, and have some mild mints with you, like TicTacs. Fruity is usually good, and less overpowering. If you're at a party, don't worry too much about what you're eating if you're both eating the same things, but a huge plate of hummus & extra garlic is a bad choice right before kissing =P. That's where mints come in handy for both of you. Casually offer him one if he's been gorging on something stinky.

--Jack
(16/m)

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can i be pregnant when sperm went to my trousers and to my hand and then i touched with the same hand my vagina. and sperm came inside of my trousers.

The chances are slim, but there is still a possibility that you may have become impregnated. Any time sperm comes near your vagina, you run the risk of becoming pregnant.

Wait a few days and take a pregnancy test.

Next time please use protection even if you're not having vaginal sex.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I have tanned skin..what color hair would look better with that..a honey brown or black??

Honestly both would look fine to me. I'm a guy so maybe that means more to you, or maybe that means less to you.

Try one out, and if you don't like it, then try the other out.

=]

--Jack
(16/m)

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i know this is a wierd ?
but where is the safest place to live in the usa

like with the least natural disasters

or at least nothing huge

Anywhere you live you're going to have some type of disaster. The south has hurricanes and tropical storms. The west has violent forest fires and sometimes earthquakes. The east also can have hurricanes and tropical storms, but that's usually not in the northeast.

Like someone else said, the Mid-west is probably your best bet. I live in the Mid-west and really the only thing we get is an occasional tornado. But then again I'm from Michigan so I'm like the farthest end of it ;]

If you're in the center of the mid-west, there are windstorms, snowstorms, violent thunderstorms, etc. But I would say Ohio, Michigan, Indiana and Illinois are the safest because really the only thing we have is snow storms, but they usually aren't that bad.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Okay, dont ask why but I need the dirtiest song you have ever heard of.
Name and Singer both would be helpfull


Thanks

"Crank That" -Soulja Boy.

Ugh it's sick.

--Jack
(16/m)

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does the first time for a girl hurt?
i thought it was supposed to feel good..?
just wondering, thanks!
13/f

I've heard it hurts so bad that people have stopped having sex all together as teenagers, and they are scared that they will have children, so they are abstaining until they are adults.

Okay so I'm kidding, but as much as I would like that to be the truth, it's not.

Yes, it does often hurt the first few times, especially for a girl. There's really nothing you can do about that. Sorry =/.

--Jack
(16/m)

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are there going to be anymore zoey 101 or drake and josh episodes?

and if not,how come?

To be best of my knowledge, I heard that Zoey 101 was canceled because of Jamie getting pregnant. Whether or not that is permanent is debatable. If it takes too long for her to recover from the pregnancy and such, well then they might not bring it back because she might be too old by then.

Drake and Josh is DEFINITELY over. For one, Miranda Cosgrove is working on iCarly now, and there's really no way she could do TWO shows on TV. Also, Josh has started working in movies and such and he's well on his career already and doing a TV show would prevent him from doing movies. Drake is also in movies now, and obviously he has a music career, too that would interfere.

Plus there's the fact that they are both getting too old for the show ;].

I was listening to a local radio station, and Josh was a guest, and he said that the show is finished.

I gotta add that I really liked that show ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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what are some tips for teaching yourself to backflip without any help
im a bit scared of trying it not in the pool cause ive done it in the pool and it didnt work that well

but im afraid of braking my neck or something if i land wrong

thanks in advance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=521NIVPIxWs


That is a nice tutorial. Please read the disclaimers in the video- because that's everything I wanted to tell you, but I think it tells you pretty nicely. ;]


Basically:

1. Try on a trampoline first or another soft area where it won't hurt to land.

2. If you possibly can, go to a gymnastics center and learn. You can get one-on-one time with an instructor.

3. ALWAYS have a spotter. They don't have to touch you after you get the hang of it, but you need to have someone there whom you can trust won't let you get hurt.


PLEASE be safe ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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there is this guy who is a bit older than i am (we're both in college) and he works at the library ... in order to borrow anything from them i have to go through the reserve desk and that's where he works.... so anyhow... i've been doing everything: eye contact smiles everything... i've only gotten to the point where he realizes that i am interested and he acknowledges. he flirted a couple of times the day before but the next day there was less eye contact (though he would acknowledge my presence by smiling or looking or smiling to himself when i look over) i don't want to seem desperate or basically young and clingy but thats the way i feel when i see him... my stomach goes in knots and i can't help but look to see if he is there (he is a master's candidate and i am a senior- he pointed that out casually to "us" and my research group when we wanted to borrow projector equipment and so on).....

what should i do? i mean how do i get him to do something? and what should i say to him while returning stuff... what kind of small talk should i initiate?? AND HOW DO I KNW HE LIKES ME! i am Hispanic so i have a very small waistline and small bust and hugeeee thighs and knees (pear shaped) compared to the proportions of Caucasians which makes me feel very very conscious ... i am really confused i mean how do i tell if he finds me unattractive?!?!?!

When you start a conversation with him, just be yourself. If you try to be someone else, he might end up liking someone who isn't YOU.

Here's some flirting tips if you want them:

1. Smile! If you're not smiling, chances are the guy won't be interested.
2. Don't always talk about yourself, let him talk about himself, too! Balance the conversation. Yes, conversations are a HUGE way to flirt more indirectly ;].
3. Think about what you do. Don't just blindly go around flirting with everyone. Some people don't want to flirt, and you can tell by their body language, facial expressions, etc.
4. Be nice. I can't tell you how many times I've seen girls be complete bitches. It's SO irritating. If you're not nice, then it isn't worth the effort. Guys don't like bitches.
5. BE YOURSELF! I know you said not to say this, but as the above question told you, if you aren't yourself- who are you going to be? You aren't being truthful with the guy if you're making up things about yourself or you're doing things you normally wouldn't do. The guy will get the wrong impression and may like something about you that isn't even a part of you.
6. HAVE FUN! If you aren't at least doing that, I don't know what to tell you ;]




And here's how you'll know if he could possibly like you:

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.





And as a side note, he may have stopped flirting because after all, he is working, and it's a little unprofessional. See if you can ask him on a "date" to go see a movie or something?

--Jack
(16/m)

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Heres the scoop. I have a boyfriend. We have been dating for about a month. My rents are "old school" and seem to think that if you have a boyfriend, you cant have boy friends. So, i have to choose between my boyfriend (which means losing all my guy friends) or my guy friends (which means losing my boyfriend). I dont know what to do. What should i do

Talk to your parents. Tell them in a mature matter that really, times have changed, and just because you have a boyfriend doesn't mean you can't have friends that are boys whom you have NO romantic feelings for.

If I had to get rid of all of my friends that were girls when I dated a girl, wow- I wouldn't have many friends then. xD

If they don't want you to have both of them together, tell them that it's YOUR life, and you need to start making your own decisions. No, it's not like you're deciding whether to have sex or not; you're deciding that you want to keep all of your friends.

I bet if you show them maturity, they might drop their idea, because it's pretty lame ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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me and my boyfriend have been together for 10 months and we have a wonderful relationship.

i have bad dreams about him cheating and us breaking up sometimes..what do they mean?

Usually dreams are exactly that- DREAMS. Sure, sometimes they can have a lot to do with your life and can seem very real, but also, they can be completely odd and off-the-wall.

If outside of your dreams you do not have ANY suspicions of him cheating, well then the dreams mean nothing. But if you do, well then maybe.

But for all intensive purposes, dreams mostly have no correlation to our actual lives. I've had dreams about being in my history class freshmen year, and then Stephenie Meyer walked in and wouldn't give me an autograph. Did that really happen? No. Will it ever happen? Probably not.

--Jack
(16/m)

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So last night i went to a Jonas Brothers concert. I have been to 8 or 9 concerts of theirs and every time it's over i get kind of depressed.
It might be because i didn't get to meet them and some of my friends did. And it might be because i didn't have the best seats. Idk what it is but i just feel so sad!

What can i do?

Next time if you feel it necessary, invest in better seats, if it doesn't make too much of a whole in your wallet. ;]

Try to see if you can get backstage passes or whatever that will allow you to meet them.

If those are too much money, try either watching a bunch of youtube videos about the Jonas Brothers or get out and DO something that will get your mind off of it.

--Jack
(16/m)

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16/f

there's this guy that i have had a crush on for a little over a month now. i knew him from a couple classes last school year and a school related activity. we act like acquaintances, but we know each other like friends, if that makes sense. starting monday was when the activity started and i see him everyday. i want to get to know him better and everything, but after a bit of time, what are some hints that guys give that show that they like girls?

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.



=]

--Jack
(16/m)

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I was wondering if you could explain to me how to multiply and factor?

Things like this:

Multiply:

(2x)(3x)(4x)

and

2xy(x - y)

and

(x+2)(x+5)


Factor:

2x^3 - 6x

and

x^2y+xy^2

I have a whole page I'm supposed to do but I have no idea how =[

Hello.

To do the first problem, you have to multiply like terms. So since they are already like terms [all are in terms of x].

So you would first multiply 2x by 3x and you first multiply the 2 and the 3 to get 6 and then the two xs to get x^2. So put them together to get 6x^2. Then you still have to multiply that by the 4x. So 6 times 4 to get 24, then x^2 by x and you get x^3. So together you get 24x^3 and that's your answer.

For the second problem, you have to distribute.

So first you have to multiply the x in the parentheses by everything outside of it.

So x times 2xy is 2x^2y, because you only multiply the xs when the "2xy" is a number together.

Remember when you multiply the "y" by the "2xy", the y is actually negative. So then you put the negative sign in front of that entire number, making it -2xy^2.

Then you combine your two numbers to get the answer:

2x^2y-2xy^2


For the third one, use something teachers often refer to as the FOIL method. That's First, Outer, Inner, Last.

So multiply the First two terms by each other:

x times x is...

Then do the Outer terms:

x times 5 is...

Then do the Inner terms:

2 times x is...

Then do the Last terms:

2 times 5 is...

Then, combine like terms, and your answer should look like this:

x^2+7x+10


For the first factoring problem, what you have to do is "take out" a number or variable that is common in each term of the problem.

So between 2x^3 and 6x, what is common? They both have xs and they both have a 2 in them [6x can be thought of as 2x times 3]. So take out "2x" from each.

That leaves 2x^3 to be x^2.
That leaves 6x to be 3.

So...

2x^3-6x can be factored to be:

2x (x^2 - 3)


Do the same thing for the last problem. Find something common between the terms.

Each one has an x and a y. So the common term is xy.

Take "xy" out of each of the terms and it should come out to be...

x^2y --> x
xy^2 --> y


So your factors are:

(xy)(x + y)


I hope you followed that. Notice how I didn't just tell you the answer, I let you know how to do it. =]

Thanks for inboxing.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Can You Actually Get Famous From Posting Videos On Youtube? Singing Videos I Guess. Like If Some Company Finds You And Likes You Or Something. Has That Every Happened Before?

Yes, it's possible, but very unlikely.

If you've ever heard of FronkNDego, Smosh, and Fred, you would know that YouTube made them very famous. I'm sure there are plenty more, but the point is that if you have something original that you're doing, you could become "famous".

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

Okay so
Me and my boyfriend are sexually active, but rarely. The times we do have sex we're ALWAYS protected.
The condom has never busted or anything like that... but I have a question.


Is it normal for periods to be 1-2 weeks late every once in awhile? I'm 18 years old... and I don't know I always have scares like this, I guess I'm just paranoid... but I've been getting the faint stomach pains that always come before my period.. but it's just not coming and i don't understand why. We probably had sex either right after my last period came or right before... I can't exactly remember, but either why it was about a month and a week or something ago.



So is this normal?
Please give me all the advice you can.

Having a period be a week late is completely normal. Periods as teenagers are hardly regular, and periods as adults are hardly regular, too. Sure, some girls are lucky and it comes on the same day every month, but that's not always the case.

Like the other person said, if you stress about getting your period, it will delay. Why? I'm not really sure, I just know that that has happened a lot.

It doesn't matter when you have sex during your cycle, you can still become pregnant. Glad to hear you're at least using protection. Birth control is another option which you should consider.

--Jack
(16/m)

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is der any way i can upload a youtube video and then not let anyone see it?

i mean like, it's private?

am i allowed to have a "private" profile that noone can view?


if so, how? and please tell me the process and what to click.

thanks,
confused_youtuber

http://www.google.com/support/youtube/bin/answer.py?hlrm=en&answer=59208

From there:


How do I make my video private?
If you'd like to make sure your video(s) are seen only by the people you hand-pick, you should set your video to "Private". Here's how:

1. Sign in and go to "My Videos".
2. Click the "Edit Video Info" button beside the video in question.
3. Scroll down to the Broadcast section and select the "Private" option.
4. Be sure to then select the specific contact list you want to see the video.
5. If a list is too large, select the individuals with whom you'd like to share the video.
6. When using lists, always double-check to be sure the contact list you select includes only the people you want to see that video. Check your Contact Lists.
7. Click the "Update Video Info" button.



There you go ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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