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Parents making me choose btwn friends and boyfriend
Heres the scoop. I have a boyfriend. We have been dating for about a month. My rents are "old school" and seem to think that if you have a boyfriend, you cant have boy friends. So, i have to choose between my boyfriend (which means losing all my guy friends) or my guy friends (which means losing my boyfriend). I dont know what to do. What should i do
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
I simply wouldn't listen to them it's your choice, your decision, not theirs.
So talk to your boyfriend and ask him how he feels about you still having guy friends, and make it clear to your parents that it's your life, and your decision, and that you had talked to your boyfriend about it.
And if your boyfriend says he cares that you have guy friends then he's probably not even really worth it, unless you're married, or have children with him then you should never choose a guy over friends you had for years.
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Talk to your parents. Tell them in a mature matter that really, times have changed, and just because you have a boyfriend doesn't mean you can't have friends that are boys whom you have NO romantic feelings for.
If I had to get rid of all of my friends that were girls when I dated a girl, wow- I wouldn't have many friends then. xD
If they don't want you to have both of them together, tell them that it's YOUR life, and you need to start making your own decisions. No, it's not like you're deciding whether to have sex or not; you're deciding that you want to keep all of your friends.
I bet if you show them maturity, they might drop their idea, because it's pretty lame ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
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I do not quite understand your question.
A romantic "boyfriend" and a "boy friend" or a few "boy friends" are not the same. Even if your "renters" (giggle) are "old school", I cannot understand why they would object to your having "boy friends"!! I mean, they are just friends, are they not? It sounds like they are worried that you are going to be a whore or something!
Well, there IS an etiquette to this. Like not meeting "privately" with your individual "boy friends". And dating more than one guy at the same time is also considered "slutty". It's also unfair to the two guys you might date.
You do not really describe what your relationships are in this, what you consider to be intellectual and casual friendship or romantic friendship and how that affects your relationships. So it is difficult for being fair to anyone as well as to yourself in any suggestion or comment.
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I would talk to your parents and tell them that you like to hang out with guys better because you don't get in drama and you are more comfortable around them. Tell them they are your really good friends and you can't lose them. If they understand, then wala. If they don't let you keep both, i would go with my friends because friends last forever, boyfriends don't. Hope this helps!
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Are you a tomboy? Because if you are, you can try assuring your parents that you're just more comfortable with the guys.
If not, then have you tried bringing your girlfriends along when you're hang out with your guy friends?
cheers,
stargirl
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um have both i dont think thats fair at all just seem like your just with your boyfriend but your really hanging out with all your guy firends still if your not into like sneaking around or lying to your parents then dont do it talk to them about it that you dont think its fair that you have to choose that its wrong and shouldnt have to be that way.
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