I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 64967
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Families
View All
Favorite Columnists
karenR
DangerNerd
Razhie
isis
Xenolan
ScratchesOnTheWall
not_your_star34
alisonmarie
HectorJr
BitsandPieces
sassysara
more...
|
| |
|
I love Matt.We have been together for 4 years. Were both 22 years old.He is my love,my life, literally.We had a child together 2 years ago and gave him up for adoption right after i had him.I chose not to see his face after i gave birth for i might want to keep him.I did this because i know that i couldnt afford a child and i didnt want to put him through tough times.We found the perfect family and he is theirs now.We never told anybody about this and now its starting to bother me.im not getting into detail but Matt has decided that he feels married and doesnt want me anymore.Do you know how bad it hurts to hear that from someone that you would take your life for? Our house got raided by the swat team for marijuana and Matt is getting sentenced on 10/20/06. Im scared that he is trying to get rid of me before this happens.And his friends have no respect for me.They all diss women and make me feel like a piece of crap.Im deeply depressed and i am afraid that i need help.All i want is matt.I cant eat, sleep, barely talk.I have no strive for life.He says im holding him back!from what? HE IS A FELON.He cant really do ANYTHING.I just gave him 1200 cash in september for his birthday so he could buy the sr20det engine from Japan.I love him so much.I need help before i hurt someone.Everyone says,Jes you can do better you dont deserve to be called retarted,stupid,annoying,dumb,idiot,etc.from the love of my life.He keeps kicking me out of the house and i just cant leave.Now he is going to buy a half a million dollar house with the guys that put me down.How can someone fall out of love like that.Our sex life is great.He wont ever get better than me(and i say that because i know that im his"fit")alright im done.THanks (link)
|
I'm not surprised you feel so depressed right now. For a woman of just 22 years, you have been through a lot and over the last two years, you have been up and down an emotional rollercoaster, with no soft bottom to it.
First off, I really have to say that no man should ever be your whole life. It's fine for them to be the largest part of it but who are you living this life for? The number one person you should be living life for is you. If you hang all your hopes and dreams on one other person, who is going to hold them up when they let you down? You have to be more dependent than that, stronger than that and you need to find that strength right now because you deserve better.
Let's look at the facts, this guy had a baby with you, spent the last four years with you, then got arrested for posession of illegal substances and may be going to prison. In the meantime, he is bad mouthing you with his friends right in front of your face and taking your money for something he doesn't need and probably won't make use of if he ends up in prison because he was irresponsible and didn't consider the consequences to YOU.
I highly suspect the reason you stay is because deep down, you're worried you don't deserve better or can't get someone better than that. I know you say he can't do better but what about you? What do YOU want? Ask yourself that and think about it for a minute. Do you really want to be with an immature man who wastes both your time, treats you like dirt and then discards you like he has? Hopefully the answer is no and if so, you need to do something about it. Get out there and find that someone better. Be the great person you obviously are and do something that is right for you, for a change. Sometimes, we have to accept that however much we love a person, our relationships with them may be doing us more harm than good. When this happens, you have to let the relationship go, or you could end up trapped like that forever.
You know, life is all about the choices we make. Do we go to that college or do we work? Do we move there or stay put? In your case, you made one of the hardest decisions a person can make and you gave your baby up for adoption. It may not have been the happiest decision but it was right for you at the time. I know it must be so hard for you sometimes but, and this is the painful part, there will always be a part of you that will regret it, at least from time to time. You knew you couldn't give your child the life you wished for him, so you gave him to someone you knew could. That's a GOOD thing. That being said, you really need to talk to someone about this, be it family, friends or someone professional. Giving up a baby is a VERY difficult decision and not always something you can deal with alone. If your boyfriend won't help you, you need to find someone who will and you shouldn't be afraid to tell your doctor you need help. The bravest people are the ones who ask for it.
Now, there's one thing that's bothering me. You say your sex life is great. I could be misunderstanding this and I hope I am misunderstanding this but it sounds as though he is trying to kick you out of the relationship but is still happy to have sex with you. If that's true, you have to stop. He doesn't deserve you and if he won't be with you properly, then you can't lower yourself to sleeping with him simply because you think it is the only way to be with them. There are a lot of men out there who think solely with their genetalia and if an attractive woman is happy to sleep with them, many of them will do it, regardless of the situation. Don't mistake sex for love. The two are very different and if he refuses to be with you but still wants to have sex, that isn't love and sleeping with him will only lower your self esteem and allow him to use your body as he wishes.
I really think you need to make a clean break with your life and give it a chance to start. You say he is the love of your life but you have been with him since you were 18. Your life has barely started. Don't limit yourself to the possibility that you will only ever love one man in this way. Love knows no bounds, so go out and find someone good and decent and true and kind, who doesn't treat you like dirt and let him love you the way you deserve to be loved. I promise that it will happen if you are open to it. In my opinion, this guy isn't the one for you. Please, break away and start over. You owe yourself another chance.
|
at school, i was walking with a laptop and i slipped and dropped it. i freaked out cuz i thought it broke. it might be broken, i dont know. i immediately tried to turn it on, and it turns on. the mouse still works, too. but when it goes to the "Windows" screen, the log-in screen doesn't show up. so basically it shows windows forever.
did i break it? can they reinstall windows to fix it?? (link)
|
I spoke to my partner, who knows about these things and he said that the problem with this specific fault is that it can occur for a number of different reasons. Although it is possible it is due to the fact that you dropped it, you really need to take it to a computer repair shop, so that they can take it apart and properly assess the problem.
Whatever the reason, there is a good chance they may be able to repair it. Although dropping it can break some internal parts, it doesn't often break the whole laptop, so try not to worry too much about this for now.
|
13/f.
I would really like to join a belly dancing class and have been looking on the internet for classes in Norfolk, UK but I can't find anything. Do you know of any belly dancing classes in Norfolk, Uk? If you do will you please tell me the website address for the dance class.
Thanks (link)
| |
I actually live in Dorset so I couldn't personally advise you of any classes but down here, they advertise belly dancing lessons in the Advertiser and the Echo. I think the Echo is made all over Britain so you could have a look in there and if you have a Norfolk version of the Advertiser (we get it here every Wednesday or Thursday), then your best bet is to look under the What's Going On section, or similar equivalent.
|
|
hi, well 14 and i have to much to do if you get me. i have soo much homework because im doing my GCSE's now and even my teachers are saying that The UK is one of the countries that has the most coursework to do, and they then say that they understand the pressure. i mean if they understand why give us so much. i have to look after my pet because no-one else does, i practice 2 instruments, 1 of which i have lessons for. on top of all that i need a darn social life aswell, and i just dont have time to fit ALL of it in. i usually find my self doing huge essays the day before they are in, and my teachers keep telling us how these two years are the most important ever of your compulsory education! any advice? thanks (link)
|
Ah, I remember the GCSE's. Two painful years of sweat, blood and tears, followed by the stress of the actual exams!
Unfortunately, yes, the coursework is horrendous. It wasn't unusual at my school to have between 5 and 6 hours of homework set to us each night, including the coursework and even though that was what they set, no matter how hard I worked, I could never finish it in that time!
I must admit, for those two years, I didn't really have much of a social life anyway, due to some personal issues but what I can tell you is that although it wasn't my first choice, I had to spend most of my evenings doing homework during the week and reserve seeing friends to weekends. I know it's not what you want to do, but if you slog it out and do the work for the weekend on a Friday night, you have the whole weekend free to do whatever you want.
Of course, in your situation, working out time to practise two instruments is difficult as well. I can appreciate that you probably enjoy playing these but somewhere, something needs to be left out because there just aren't enough hours in the day when you are studying for GCSE's. You may not want to, but it might be best to drop the instrument you don't have lessons for and practise the other one hour every day, before or after school.
When it comes to essays, unfortunately, the only thing you can do is to knuckle down and work until it is done. I would love to say there's an easy way to do them but from experience I can tell you that there is no shortcut on these. Make sure you make as many notes on the subjects in the lessons, as these will help you when it comes to writing the essay. It will give you a good starting point because the majority of the information will be there.
If it helps you, try drawing up a timetable this weekend while you have some time. Work out roughly how many hours a night you need to spend on your homework. If your school is anything like mine was, it will be between 4 and 5 hours a night. If it's easier homework, like a research topic or answering some questions frm a text, work on it with some friends. Form a small homework/study group. Such a working manner will prove invaluable when it comes to studying for the GCSE's, because as long as you work hard, by then you will find it a lot easier to work in a group to learn things and you will learn more effectively as a result. The main thing is to remember it is NOT a social gathering. You can make studying more fun and all brings snacks but you have to work, not just talk and have fun.
As far as these two years being the most important, I would agree but only to a certain extent. Due to a personal problem, I missed 3 months of school before the exams and had to drop two subjects as a result. I didn't do too badly in the end but it has never really affected me so far. That being said, GCSE's pave the way for the dreaded AS and A2 exams, which you NEED to get if you want to go straight to university. The more you learn now, the easier the AS and A2's will be.
In the meantime, the social life will have to be placed on the back burner I'm afraid and in order to relieve the pressure currently on you, you will have to consider dropping at least one of the musical intruments, unless it is something you need for one of your courses. If it isn't, remember you don't have to do everything now and you can take it back up after these exams if you want to.
I will leave you with one final thought. When I was at school, I was quite lazy when it came to school work. I never worked as hard as I could, choosing to watch TV instead or play games on the computer. I was lucky with my GCSE's but I dropped out after A2's, partly because I failed most of them. Not a single day goes by where I don't regret not trying harder. School is more valuable to you than you think it is while you are there and although it's a cliche, it really is the best time of your life because it is SO much easier!! Make the most of it and don't stop working hard. You will get there and when you do well in your exams, it will all be worth it, so try to work as hard as you can now and it will be something you can spend the rest of your lifel congratulating yourself at succeeding at. You CAN do it and believe me, you will do it well.
|
What will increase your reading level? What are some good things that could help me not so stressed because recently, I did bad on my CSAP scores and I'm very mad at myself. What can make me smarter or do better at school?
sorry there's a lot of questions, but I need help, PRONTO. (link)
|
First of all, the key to improving your reading level is to constantly challenge yourself. Romantic and comedy fiction books are great to read but they aren't challenging. After realising this, I've now begun to alternate the books I read. I'll read one that is light fiction and follow it up with a Charles Dickens or a Douglas Kennedy or a Charlotte Bronte. A lot of these books are much harder going (I have to sit with a dictionary next to me at all times when reading Douglas Kennedy novels) but because they are challenging and about real issues, they help to broaden horizons and your vocabulary at the same time. With books by people like Charles Dickens, Charlotte Bronte, Emily Bronte, Harper Lee and others from those sorts of eras, you also learn more about life 'way back when', which will also help.
As for keeping you from getting stressed, exercise is the best natural remedy for high stress levels. Exercise increases the dopamine which helps to make you feel happier and more relaxed. Failing this, try some relaxing breathing exercises (in through the nose for 7 counts and out through the nose for 4 counts) and every now and then indulge yourself with a food treat or a pampering session or a girly night in, so you have opportunities to unwind a little. You also need to let go of the guilt and resentment you are harbouring towards yourself over your test scores. Even the smartest people in the world sometimes fall down when it comes to tests and you need to let yourself off the hook. Okay, so you didn't do as well as you had hoped. Next time, you will do better. Keep telling yourself that. You WILL do better. Every time you think the opposite, catch yourself and reverse it. You WILL do better.
I don't think the problems is that you aren't smart enough. I think you are lacking in confidence. The chances are, you are a lot more intelligent than you give yourself credit for but perhaps you haven't dedicated yourself to studying as you could have. Perhaps you don't pay as much attention or work as hard when you are at school as you could do. If you know any of this to be true, you need to make an effort to change it. No amount of positive thinking will help you if you don't learn the material!
Try getting a small study group together when you have an approaching test. This was a great help to me when I was at school. You have to make sure everyone stays focused but you could get teams set up, taking turns to fire questions at each other on whatever subject you are studying for. Have a prize or a forfiet (or both) set out ready and quiz away. It makes you sure you learn the material but it isn't boring. You could also try flashcards of questions and answers and putting facts on post-it notes around your home, so you can only move forward around your home once you have recited the information to yourself.
Studying IS hard but it is so worth it in the end. The problem is that people let it get too boring and that doesn't work for everyone. If you need to keep it interesting, find ways, like the team quizzing sessions, to keep it interesting and you will find it works a lot more effectively.
|
last night me and my friend were at a volleyball game and all of a sudden she started getting numb in her fingers and her head started to really hurt and she siad she got dizzy. then the numbness spread and eventually it was like her arms down to her knees and she said it really hurt to move her arms and so she would stop moving her arms and she felt like they were stuck and she couldn't move them so she'd try to move them and they'd start to really hurt agian. she said that she was still dizzy. i wanted to get a security gaurd just because i thought we should get someone but i told her to stay and she wouldn't let me go. she said it just kept getting worse when i kept asking her if she felt any better but she refused to let me get anyone. it went on for like 20 minutes and started wearing off in about two minutes but her fingers were still numb about 10 min. later. what could've happened?
o, were both 14 and she said it was probably because all she ate was pizza that day even though that never happened before and she gets dehidrated. or used to. but her friend just told her something that should've upset her a few hours earlier but she didn't seem too upset. can that have to do with it? basically is she ok? (link)
|
Her symptoms definitely do not sound as though they are related to what she ate and although it could be dehydration, it sounds more like a twinged nerve in the neck or back or similar. You haven't said whether you were playing in the game or just watching it but having looked on the net for the symptoms, it seems that you can get these symptoms from sitting in the same position for a long time or from accidentally hurting a nerve in the neck or back somehow.
This sounds like the most likely reason for what happened but she should see a doctor to be on the safe side, as it is always better to seek a professional diagnosis if something like this happens.
For more information, the website I came across with the listed symptoms and possible causes is:
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/003206.htm
|
Heyy y'all :D
I'll get right to it -
lets say there was a list of 10000 different classes you could take, everything from cooking to selfdefense, what class would you take? ölike, what would you actually ENJOY doing (not like math and physics haha) what seminar would you willingly go to, to hear about a class..
so basically, if you could invent a class that doesn't exist what would it be?
or have you ever been to some kind of class that you would love to go to again or even have as a real class in school?? (link)
|
Actually, it would be cooking. I used to cook a lot in lessons when I was at school and I loved it a lot. Unfortunately, after my GCSE's, they didn't offer it at the next level so I never had the opportunity to further that.
These days, I don't have much time for cooking so that would be my absoloute favourite choice.
That....and creative writing, because I miss writing very much.
|
|
ok well i feal like such a bad person. Like im aalways hurting. Because my boyfriend went to the army and i feel bad cuz i talk to guys but not flirt and i feel like thats wrong. And i drank a couple of times n i feel bad for doing that. i feel like im such a bad person and i jsut want to die. i dont know what to do HELP! (link)
|
The first thing here is that I am sure he realises how difficult this time is for you. Having a boyfriend gone for any reason is hard enough but having him gone because he is in the army is by far the hardest.
That being said, you haven't done anything wrong. You keep punishing yourself for things you haven't done and know you wouldn't want to do. All you are doing is hanging out with people. Yes, guys can become boyfriends, they can become husbands, they can become men we have affairs with but they can also JUST be friends. This is something we tend to forget, especially when in relationships. If all these men are to you is friends, why are you so determined to beat yourself up about it?
I understand you are loyal to boyfriend. This is a very good thing and given that he's in the army, it's very admirable. I for one have known some people who would barely bat an eyelid at hooking up with another guy if their own was in the army! But you need to let yourself have fun as well. Just because he's gone, it doesn't mean your life has to stop. He may be the most important thing in your life but no man should ever be the ONLY thing in your life. You need to have a life without him. That doesn't mean you flirt with other men or that you go further than that. It just means that you remember to have fun and be you without the romantic aspect of your life.
Please don't be so hard on yourself. You are allowed to have fun. You are even allowed to have fun with other men. Just as long as you don't do anything romantic or sexual with them, you aren't hurting anyone and you aren't doing anything that would risk hurting your relationship.
|
|
ok my butt crack itches really bad... like for 2 days its been going on.. its happened before but only for like 2 or 3 days so im hopin its the same.. is it bad? like it itches reaaaaaaaaaly bad.. is that bad? is there anything i can do to stop it? (link)
|
There are two possibilities where symptoms like this occur, as far I'm aware.
The first possibility is that you have what is known as a rectal tear. Basically, this occurs when you have to push to (delicately put) get things out. It's a common symptom of a lack of fibre in the diet. If you noticed a small amount of blood on the toilet paper after going to the loo a few days ago, this is very possible. When it heals over, which it does naturally, it can itch a bit. The bad news is that there really isn't anything you can do to stop it unless your local chemist offers some topical ointment for this.
The other possibility is worms. Tapeworms, in particular, are not uncommon and are usually passed through bacteria transferred by hand to mouth contact. One of the many reasons to ALWAYS wash your hands after going to the toilet and before you eat. These little parasites can make you feel very itchy round your back passage, usually more so in the evenings. Normally, there will be some evidence of this when you go to the toilet, as you will be able to see them among your stools. The good news is they can be treated with tablets so if it looks like this may be the reason, if you pay a visit to your doctor, they will be able to sort you out with some medication.
|
i really need help. like, from a pyschatrist. and i really don't know how to ask my parents.
but first i wanted to ask everyone on here a few questions.
IF YOU HAVE BEEN TO A SHRINK;
-- is it weird talking to them?
-- does it really help?
-- how did you ask your parents?
-- how does it work? like the visits?
thank you everyone that takes the time to answer. (link)
|
First of all, it was a little weird talking to a psychiatrist to begin with but after a while, you get used to talking all your problems through and it becomes very second nature.
I believe it does help but it depends on the therapist because you need to find someone you gel with well. I had 4 therapists in all and there was only one I truly gelled with enough to allow them to help me. As a result of that, it made a real difference. You just need to be prepared to be open about everything you feel and experience.
I actually didn't ask my parents. I had some stuff happen in my life and my doctor assigned me to a therapist. However, my Mum in particular was very supportive and took me to nearly every appointment I had over the next 5 years.
The main thing about the appointments is, as I said, you need to be open about everything. They can't help you through all your problems and emotions if you don't tell them everything. They discuss things that upset you, things that worry you and coping methods for all of those. That being said, it depends on the therapist. I had a mixture of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and Psychotherapy.
If you think you need to see someone, you need to speak to your parents about it and explain how you feel. Tell them that you have whatever the problem may be and you would feel better if someone professional could help talk you through things. It's very common for young people, especially teenagers, to struggle with their emotions and there's no shame in admitting you need to offload some of it and get some real help managing at times. Explain this to them and I'm sure they will be happy to help you.
|
|
So....i think me and my boyfriend have had sex probably over one hundred times. but i have never orgasimed...i need to orgasim...hes not bad! at all, but i dont know what it is...advice, how can i not put all the pressure on him, cuz i kno he feels bad. (link)
|
The advice already provided is excellent. I just wanted to add that actually, not all women are able to achieve orgasm through penetration alone. The media makes us believe that as long as a guy is good in bed, we can all achieve mind blowing orgasms through sex alone. In truth, only around 33% of women can.
It might be that you are one of these people but the best thing you can do is to keep trying to work out what feels best for you. The G-Spot is something most women associate with orgasms so locate yours and try to incorporate stimulation of this area when having sex. It should be around the size of a 20p piece when you are aroused and is about halfway between the back of the pubic bone and the top of the cervix. Some women find it very pleasurable to have this area stimulated, some find it makes them need to urinate and some find it has no effect at all.
Please, please don't put too much pressure on yourself to climax, because this will only make it harder and will put a strain on the relationship. Sex should never be about the result. It should be about the connection between two people. Work on that for now and if the orgasm happens, it happens. If it doesn't, hopefully you will both realise that it's natural and bears no reflection on the performance of either party.
|
|
13/f/8th grade. i have a school dance this friday, and the theme is 60's mod. what should i wear? and what kind of make up would be good? and if you have anymore school dance advice or whatever, dont hesitate to tell me! (link)
|
The first thing to remember is that there's a big difference between 60's mod and 60's hippie.
Typically, 60's mod (mod standing for Modern) was bold, bright colours, miniskirts, flat knee length boots, beehive haircuts, short, angular style bobs. Contrary to what some people portray on TV and in films, platform boots were a 70's fashion, not 60's fashion.
Anyway, to help you work out what sort of thing I'm talking about (because it's easier to see it for yourself than hear someone try to describe it), I've put a few links below to websites which have pictures of some 60's Mod fashions.
http://www.fiftiesweb.com/fashion/mod-fashion.htm
http://sugarzine.com/site_08.03/fashion.html
http://www.modculture.co.uk/style/
Have fun at the party!
|
I read washing your hair once a day is super bad for it. My hair is quite damaged (I've already switched to SunSilk Hydra TLC and I now use a heat protectant) but I want to see what not washing my hair so much will do for it.
How many days should I go without washing it?
And, what if my hair looks greasy, will that stop when it gets used to not being washed as much? (link)
|
You should actually wash your hair a maximum of every three days, according to a book I've got about Health and Beauty.
If your hair is damaged, a heat protectant and a moisturising/hydrating shampoo/conditioner will help. However, if the damage is caused by straightening, no amount of correctional products will repair the damage. Unfortunately, this is something I have learned from experience.
After using straighteners for two and a half years just twice a week, I had to stop because of the damage it caused. I haven't used them in nearly a year now and almost all the damage has gone. However, the minute I used them (up until now) over the last year, it wrecked the hair.
If it IS caused through straightening, you need to ditch the straighteners as much as possible and try only using them very occasionally. If at all possible, stop using them altogether for around 6 months, let your hair grow and then have a trim to get rid of the split ends. No matter what they say, split ends CANNOT be repaired. They can only be prevented or chopped off when they appear.
In the meantime, as for the washing your hair problem, try only washing it every three days. Also, keeping your hair up in a ponytail can prevent build up of grease. Finally, yes, if you stick with it, your hair will become greasy much less quickly.
|
Hi Vikki27,
I'm volleyball2150 from advicenators and I read some of your answers. I think you are amazing at this! I just felt like I really needed you to know that. If I ever have a question, I'll come straight to you. Thanks for understanding!
-Volleyball2150
PS: I added you to my favorite columnist list!! ;) (link)
|
I don't really know what to say to that!!! Thank you very much for your kind words. It's so nice to hear that my advice is appreciated.
If you want any questions answered, I will always be happy to try to help where I can. Thank you so much again.
|
My 3 best friends and I have been best friends for 2 years now and we're extremely close. But here lately one of our friends Kim has been saying a lot of lies like to get one mad at the other. I love her to death but this year she's gotten pretty stuck up and its gotten so bad where none of us call her back when she calls us because we dont believe anything that comes out of her mouth. I dont want to loose her as a friend because I love her i really do. Should the rest of us comfront her and let her know about all the lies we've caught her in? (I dont want her to think we're attacking her or anything) i mean what should we do?
Please help!! (link)
|
Absoloutely you should confront her about it!! This girl is lying to you all and trying to make you all hate each other and for what reason? You need to speak to her or you will never find out and you will never get it to stop.
On the other hand, I know this might sound far fetched to you and I could be wrong but have you considered that this girl may not be lying but rather passing on information she misunderstood? The only reason I suggest this is that I was in a similar situation when I was at school and everybody thought I was trying to turn everyone against each other. In actual fact, I heard about something and misunderstood the truth.
Speak to her about it. Don't shout or accuse or behave angrily towards her, because chances are that if you do that, she'll be a deer caught in headlights and that will make the situation worse.
Instead, all agree to meet her somewhere and tell her the things she had told you and then the truths of the situation, one lie at a time. See what she has to herself when you are done. If she apologises, forgive her and tell her she has to stop telling people things that she doesn't know are true, otherwise you can't keep being friends.
If she denies the whole thing, you really need to work out what to do about the situation. Unfortunately, lying friends, who then lie about lying are the worst to deal with and it's really up to your friends and you to decide from that point whether you wish to continue your friendship with her or to refuse to put up with her any longer.
|
Hey,
I'm 15/f and I really want to get more in shape and shed a few pounds, I usually try to run but thats about it. I really would like to do palaites. How would I do that. Can I do it home, do I need a video or something?
And would palaties help me becuase more lean and thinner in the stomach, upper arm, and upper leg area? (link)
|
Pilates is very good for toning and increasing core strength but if you want to lose weight as well, you need fat burning exercises as well like aerobics, cycling, swimming, running (which as you have said you are doing)and skipping.
As for how you would do it and whether you can do it at home, yes you can because there are lots of videos, books and DVD's for Pilates. However, I would recommend that you go to a class to begin with. Most sports and leisure facilities offer classes like this so look around and see what you can find. Whenever you begin a new sport or exercise, you should have professional instruction to begin with, to ensure you are doing it correctly. Videos and DVD's etc are fine when you know what you're doing but they can't correct you if you don't have it quite right.
Pilates should help you to tone up, although the different areas it helps and how effectively it does this will depend upon the instructor/DVD/video/book, but mainly tones and strengthens your bum, stomach, thighs and back.
|
i have this guy friend called Chris and i think he's just the best. he's so funny and caring and just so amazingly awesome!
the other day we were hanging out and just before he left he said he had something to tell me. he told me that he loved me and that he had done ever since the first time he'd met me. then he kiss me and ran out. i realised after he'd left that i'd fallen in love with him too, and it just took him saying it to make me realise that i did. but have i left it too late to tell him?? i don't want him to think that i don't like him and miss my chance but i just don't know how to say it now, the moments kind of gone?!
thanks (link)
|
It's never too late to tell someone you love them. If you really do feel that way, just tell him. There doesn't need to be a moment or a time or a place because he will just be pleased to know you feel the same way.
I would, however, suggest that you tell him in person. You need to sit him down, look him straight in the eye and just say it.
If, on the other hand, you really want to create a moment, get him to go for a walk somewhere with you. Get him to hang out with you at home if you like and put some soft music on. Go out for a meal and tell him there. Moments can be made anywhere, so use that to your advantage.
Good luck to you both.
|
all my friends are ragging me that i don't wear any thongs i was wondering why people wear them anyways since they so uncomfortable and what should i do about my friends
(link)
|
Most people wear thongs because it helps to prevent the 'dreaded VPL' (Visible Panty Line). There's this big thing that's been about for the last few years that God forbid anyone should know you wear 'normal' underwear because they can see your knickers through your trousers or something.
It's also a fashion trend. That's why there are thongs with fancy bands and charms and diamante effects.
The other reason is sex appeal. Most people seem to believe that thongs are the sexiest underwear so women wear them (sometimes men do too) because they make them feel attractive and sexier.
That being said, I can't stand the things. I don't understand why so many people would willingly walk around with a wedgie all day!!!!
The best thing you can do to your friends is point out that since you are the one who will be wearing the underwear, it's entirely your choice what sort you wear. If you aren't comfortable having a wedgie then you won't wear a thong and that's the end of it!
Really that's the best piece of advice I can give you. People will probably tell you what you should be wearing all your life but the thing to remember is that as long as it is YOU wearing the clothes, YOU should decide what you feel comfortable in and forget the rest.
|
I don't like the guys in my grade. They dont like me. I like the guys in the grade above me. They like me.
All of my friends in my grade are friends with those guys who don't like me so its awkard.
All of the girls in the grade above me complain of them being "their guys" so i better "back off".
Help? Why dont they like me but the older ones do? And because of all this I cant get a boyfriend for beansss. Lol sorry but yeah thanks a bunch :) (link)
|
You know, if I were in your position, I would ignore what the girls in the grade above you say. Yes, they are older but isn't it their choice who they date? Isn't it your choice who you date? The only reason they are being mean to you about it is because when they were your age, they probably would have loved someone in the grade above theirs and didn't have anyone's interest. It might even be they are having trouble competing with you for the attention of the guys in their grade.
Now, obviously, as has already been said, your main focus needs to be on your studies, but if you find a guy in the grade above, the grade below or whatever other grade that you like and who likes you bafk, then you should go for it. As long as you aren't hurting anyone (taking the guy you know a friend likes or who is dating someone else) then who does it harm? It is entirely up to you and the object of your affection and you should never let anyone tell you otherwise.
I say, if you like the guys in the grade above, then you should go for it.
That being said, I will warn you that although they will be sly about it, the girls in the grade above may well begin some nasty behaviour towards you and you will want to take this into account. If you think you can handle it then you should, if you don't, then don't.
|
|
About 8 or 9 months ago, I revealed to a boy that I really like him...he said he didn't want to do anything to put our friendship at risk, so we didn't start a relationship...however, we eventually became intimate with eachother from time to time, (not the kind where I would lose my virginity, but still pretty intimate) so it's sort of evolved into a "friendship with bennefits" thing...I am still very much in love with this boy, and the more time I spend with him (intimate or not) I grow to love him even more. I'm not sure exactly how he feels about me, but I desperately want to move forward with him. I'm not sure what to do... (link)
|
I can understand why you are concerned but to be honest here, what difference would there be about the relationship you have now and what you could have if you were dating properly? From what I can see, the only difference would be that you admit how you feel about each other and it could strengthen the bond between you.
I guess the way I see it, if the current state of things hasn't ruined your relationship, then it's very unlikely that having a real relationship would.
You need to talk to him and explain how you feel. You also need to tell him that if he doesn't feel the same way then you can't keep being intimate with him because it's preventing you from moving on. I would also be very suspicious if he says at this stage he doesn't want to have a relationship with you because how can he be happy being intimate with you, knowing how you feel about him but be happy not meeting your other, emotional needs?
See what he says. He can't keep one boat on the ship and one on the shore. Tell him that you really care about him but you need to know once and for all how he feels about you. Then decide what you want to do from there.
|
|