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because..I had a dream that I kissed a previous crush...previous to my actual boyfriend..meaning that..i didn't kiss my boyfriend in my dream..but kissed someone who I used to like. =X And I mean..I still like him..but I have a boyfriend..and this just makes me doubt my relationship with my boyfriend even more! (We're having some trouble in our relationship, actually...)
can it mean anything? 16/f. my boyfriend's 16 and the guy in the dream is 16..lol this is a bit ridiculous..but it might mean something..o_o

Well, here's how dreams work. When you're awake, you have a bazillion thoughts and feelings running through your mind all day long. But a lot of those things you don't have the time, or the desire, to really sit down and "think" about. So they stay buried in your subconcious. But they're still there, and your mind needs to deal with them. So it deals with them while you sleep.

As you said, you've had a crush on this guy... but since you have a boyfriend, you've probably pushed those feelings to the back of your mind, because you feel guilty thinking about it. But the feelings are still there, so your mind explores them in your dreams.

Is that bad? Not at all... it's totally normal. Having a boyfriend, even if you're totally in love with him, doesn't stop you from being attracted to other guys. That can even happen when you're happily married. It doesn't mean you don't care for or love your boyfriend... it's just a natural feeling that you can't help. What you CAN help is whether or not you act on it. If you did, then yes, that would be cheating. But just dreaming about it isn't cheating, because you didn't actually do anything wrong... you didn't even mean to dream it!

So don't worry about it. Dreams don't mean anything except that your mind is working stuff out.

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I just turned 16 and I'm of course a girl. I never cared about what I wore to school, mostly it was jeans and t-shirts with a pony-tail, right? Well maybe two weeks ago I got the nerve to talk to this guy I've been crushing on for a while and he was nice, but only in a "I'm being nice only until someone else comes along." I dunno what switch went off in my body, but all of the sudden I wanted to be a "GIRL" for once. I wanted to flirt, I wanted to be the one the guy comes up and talks to just to talk. I felt like I could do it, but I didn't know how to do it. I know I am a girl but the main question is... How do I be a "girl"? Is it a natural thing or do I have to practice? Any help is great.

Thanks to anyone,
The tomboy turned girly-girl

Wow, my friend just went through the same transformation. Up until last year, she was the typical tomboy - sweats & t-shirts, ponytail, etc. But this year - wow! - what a change! For the first time, she's been wearing her hair down, wearing makeup and jewelry, and buying some really cute outfits. Her personality hasn't changed at all, just the way she dresses. And the guys have definitely noticed! She went from being pretty much invisible to being asked out left and right! She's still one of the "jock" girls, but now she's a hot jock!

So yeah... keep being yourself. Like you said, you ARE a girl. Just let the guys know it by taking a little more time to make yourself look like one. There's nothing wrong with that at all... it's completely natural to want to look and feel feminine. And the nice thing is, you can do it and still be yourself.


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anybody know any good self tanners? i dont want it to turn me orange and i dont want it to be lotion like jergens natural glow. thanks

I've used this kind called Self-Tanning Natural & Uniform Color by Comodynes Convenient Cosmetics. It's like a little wipe thing that comes in a packet. It worked great and didn't turn me orange.

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15/f

i'm a freshman in highschool
i feel like practically everyone drinks and smokes and has sex. i don't. is that like normal to feel this way?

and my boyfriend hangs out with people who do all that stuff. it just worries me.

do you think i'll regret not doing any of this though? i mean is really as fun as people say?
this is stupid but i don't know.

i'm not going to do any of this stuff, i just want to know. thanks =]

Well, it might seem like everyone is doing it, but I can pretty much assure you that there are plenty of people who aren't. Now, by the time you're a senior, a lot of people - maybe even the majority - probably will have tried some of those things at least once. But still, not everyone. I know plenty of people who graduated from High School without ever drinking, smoking or having sex.

But I can tell you this: the people who are doing those things now, as freshmen, aren't doing themselves any favors. They might seem like the "cool" ones right now, but just watch... by sophomore or junior year, they'll be the ones with the bad reputations that everyone looks down on. That's because all that "fun" and partying will start to take over... they'll lose interest in school, drop out of sports and activities, and eventually all they'll be known for is partying or sleeping around.

By the time you're a senior, the "popular" people will be the ones who are liked and respected by everyone because they've stayed involved in school, kept decent grades, and kept themselves out of trouble. And yeah, you might see some of them as seniors drinking at a party now and then, but they won't have ruined their reputations by doing it all the time, all through high school.

So no, I don't think you'll regret it at all if you stay away from that stuff. I think you'll be very glad!

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I scold my toddler a few times a day for trying to play in the toilet and putting things in the toilet. will this make it harder to potty train him when the time comes? I feel like he will think he needs to always stay away from the toilet. thanks

I think it depends on how you scold him. If you get very angry and yell, startling him when he's near the toilet, then it's possible that he could be hesitant to go near it when you actually want him to. Try to remain calm, and gently remove him from the bathroom. It might help to explain why he shouldn't do it, in a way he can understand (toddlers are pretty smart!). You might tell him, "No, that will break the toilet, and we don't want it to break because that's where we go potty. And some day you'll go potty there, too!"

If he just can't resist the temptation, try your best to keep him away from it. Keep the bathroom door closed or keep him occupied with other things until the phase passes.

Good luck!

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OK well i have this friend that im really close to. but lately we've been getting into a lot of arguments. And they all have to do with guys. Im gunna hate myself for saying this but shes reaaally overweight. that doesnt matter to me we've been friends forever. I know this might sound self-centered but i think she gets jealous because i get a lot of attention from guys. And recently a waaay OLDER guy has been "interested" in her.(THIS GUY IS 5+ AND SHES 16) She doesnt even know him and shes all in love with him already. I tried talkin to her about it and told her its too soon to like him that much. She said i was jealous and it all blew up in my face. But i dont want him to just sleep with her and forget her. Am i being jealous? Or am i too honest? I dont want our friendship to end over a guy she just met. So any advice would help! THANKS! =)

No, it doesn't sound like you're being jealous... it sounds like you're honestly worried about your friend getting hurt. And you're probably right. If she doesn't usually get much attention from guys, it will be easy for her to fall hard for someone who shows an interest. And yes, if this guy is a dog, she could end up being used or hurt.

unfortunately, this is a really common situation. We've all seen friends get into relationships that we don't think are the best for them. Sometimes, like your friend's situation, we can see that the guy is just using them... or it could be a guy who's too clingy, or too demanding, or even abusive... or just bad news. And we want so bad for our friend to realize what everyone else can see so plainly: This guy is no good for you!

The problem is, a girl who's "in love" isn't going to listen to anybody who tries to rain on her parade. Even if she knows deep down that it's not the best situation, she's going to close her eyes to it... and she's going to resent anyone who tries to make her see it. If it's really a bad situation, she will eventually see it, and hopefully before too much damage is done. But as much as you want to help, she's going to have to figure it out on her own. If you keep saying bad things about the guy she loves, it will jeopardize your friendship.

So my advice is... go ahead and tell her nicely - once - that you're worried about the *possibility* of her getting hurt. And then drop it. Let her go ahead and make her own decisions, and be there as her friend. If things turn out badly, she'll need you more than ever, and then you can be a shoulder for her to cry on.

Good luck!


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just a simple question. what is cheating. cause honeslty i don't know. i mean i know sex and kissing is but..is there more to cheating than physically? cause sometimes i feel like i might be cheating on my boyfriend even though i've never done anything sexually with anyone else.

Ooooh, that's a good question! I guess you can think of it as a scale. On one end, there's the obvious cheating (kissing, having sex). At the opposite end, there's the harmless talking to someone. But in between, there's various degrees of flirting. Some types of flirting can be very innocent... but if the flirting sends the message that you'd be interested in doing more, then that starts to border on cheating. I guess one way to look at is: if you'd be uncomfortable if your boyfriend was acting this way with another girl, then you shouldn't do it with another guy.

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i have moved a lot. i want to send my old friends something so i can keep in touch with them. what do you think i should do? would cards be fine? (i dont have much money to spend, but lots of friends). any ideas?

Cards and letters are great! Everyone loves to get something in the mail... it's so much better than talking online, because it's something you can keep. And it's just fun to go to the mailbox and find something addressed to you!

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okay so im a male and im 14 and i asked this girl out and she said yes but then shes like gotten all mad and i dont know if shes mad at me she wont talk to me when i try to talk to her. so i guess its my fault. any advice on how to fix this problem.

Well, knowing girls (since I am one), I would guess that you probably did do *something* that made her mad. Probably something that you had no idea would make her mad. Perhaps talking or flirting with another girl? Or not calling her or giving her the attention she thinks you should? Whatever it is, it might be something she really shouldn't be mad about... but for whatever reason, she is. Of course, you can't correct the situation if you don't know what it is.

So you need to tell her: "Look, I can tell you're mad at me for some reason, but I honestly don't know why. I want to fix the problem, but I can't if you don't tell me why you're mad. So please talk to me about it."

If she continues to act mad and won't tell you why, then unfortunately, it's probably best to move on. You can't have a relationship when there's no communication.

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my cheer tryouts start in 2 days and last for 4 days. i had surgery last week on my mouth, so im worried! i probably can do jumps ok, but im worried about tumbling and stunts. i have a video of my tumbling, but that was when i was just learning, so its by myself, but not very good. would you suggest showing the video, trying to tumble and stunt, or giving my coach a dentists note, but tell her ill try my best? i dont want to give a note because i dont want to make excuses, but idk. i was on jv last year, and im trying for varsity, so im hoping that will help, but i dont want to be like i got surgery wahh wahh i cant tryout. and im dying to make it this year what to do?

I would go ahead and try out, do your tumbling the best you can, AND give them the video. Just explain that you've just had surgery so you haven't been able to tumble recently, but you want to try to do what you can. That will show them that you aren't being a wimp. Good luck!

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okay last night i had "sex" for the first time.? but im not sure if you would call it sex. the head of his penis was in, but thats it cause the rest wouldnt fit. could you tell me if thats sex and what is actually considered sex? like, is it when the whole thing is in or what?
thanks!

Yes, I would say it's sex if the penis goes in, even if it's not all the way.

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When can people get facial corrective surgery? (What age do we "stop growing")? Not exactly cosmetic/plastic surgery but I want to correct my assymetrical face.

I've seen different ages listed... from 14 to 18. I think it probably depends on exactly what you're having done, and what the doctor's opinion is. Different doctors probably have different opinions.

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M'kay well...
I'm 13 and I'm going into High School next year
I'm about 194 lbs
But I don't look it!
To me I like like 150 lbs
But anyway...I wanna be thin.
I want a flat stomach because I'm tired of loosing every guy I like to 'skinny girls'
Not to be mean to thin girls
Hell my best friend is thin
But thats off topic
My Mom wants me to go on diet pills.
But I'm stubborn and say 'no'
I try to eat right
But I just cant help but eat my snack foods
Can you someone please list some way I can get thin by September of 2008?
I don't wanna go into High School fat and have people make fun of me.....

Ask you mom to take you to a weight loss program like Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers or Curves. A program that gives you diet AND exercise help. Belonging to a group like that is really helpful!

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Okay, so i used to think hooking up was sex...most people do. Well some people in my school were saying like "omg jen and bret hooked up this weekend!" (im in 8th grade btw) and i thought wait, its way to early for sex and i asked wait what did they do, they said they made out. So people-boys and girls, of all ages, what in your mind is hooking up?

I think it has different meanings in different places. But generally, I think it means any kind of fooling around (from making out to sex) with someone you're not in a relationship with.

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my boyriend cheat on me , is it possible for a cheater (who wont admit that he did) to not do it again or do you think h will keep cheating

Hmmmm... well, if he had admitted it, and apologized, and seemed genuinely sorry, that would mean that he really felt guilty about it... and his guilt might prevent him from doing it again. However, if he keeps denying it, that means that he's more worried about getting "in trouble" than he is about doing something wrong. And that probably means that he'd do it again, if he thinks he can get away with it. Sorry :(

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ok i had a weirdd dream. could someone decode it for me. i really dont like those websites where you put in key words. it just doesnt match up.ok in my dream it was my recent ex's party, and i was there. then i was in this room where there were pictures of people in his life hanging, and his girlfriend was in the room (and she looked like a five year old). in real life ive never seen her. well basically the picture of me and him wasnt in there. so then yeah i went back into the party, and the kid i like snuck into the party to see me. him and my ex hate each other. anyway, he pitched a tent in the middle of the party (idk!) and then my ela teacher was there. shes really strict in reall life. well she was all like "you snuck in!" and he was like "no!" and then she was like "proove it!" and he like borrowed my shampoo?! and showed her, and she was like "fine! but im keeping my eye on you" welll we were in the tent together and then all these kids were surronding us and chanting "kiss her! kiss her! kiss her!" and we kissed. and i like died inside =]. and i was like really happy. then we started making out. then i woke up. welll anyone want to decode that?

Hahah crazy dream! But okay, let's see...

The part where you're in the room with the pictures. The fact that the picture of you and him wasn't there tells you that he doesn't have feelings for you anymore; that your relationship wasn't important enough to him to hang the picture there. (Of course, that doesn't mean it's true... but somewhere in your mind you're worried that it could be, so you dreamed it, which gives you a chance to deal with how you'd feel if it were true).

His new girlfriend IS in the room, which shows that she IS very important to him (or so you believe, so you dreamed it). In real life you've never seen her, but in your dream, she looks like a little girl. That might mean that, subconciously, you think your ex might prefer a girl who's more innocent or "pure" than you are.

So you're in your ex's house, and the guy you like sneaks in; and you're worried about him being busted. That might mean you're afraid of your ex finding out that you like this guy. So you dream up someone busting him (your teacher), but she lets him stay. That could be your mind's way of telling you that you have "permission" to like this guy. The shampoo thing... hahha I have no idea!!

The kissing part... well, you've probably been thinking that you'd like to kiss this guy, so you dream it! Bummer that you had to wake up then! Haha.

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PLEASE HELP! I love my boyfriend sooo much and i dont know what to do. im moving in 3 months and he and i have best friends forever and liked each other off and on the whole time but only recently started dating. the thing is i just told him i am officially moving thursday but he knew there was a high possibility for 2 months. he almost cried when i told him and he is NOT emotional. the problem is i need him to be there for me and he isnt. he is acting like he doesnt care even tho he says he does and a thing of mine is dont believe what a boy says but what he does. and what hes doing and what hes saying are two different things. i need him-i really, really need him. hes always been there before but now hes not. hes my best friend and my other best friends are helping me but they are also hurting. im trying to be strong for my bf, my little siblings, my parents, and my friends but i CANT. Its so hard and i need him. I know I have God (im a strong Christian) but i need my bf. hes always been there to help me when i had problems with God, my friends and my family and now he just isnt. he is acting like he doesnt care and i need him to show me he cares now more than ever! i tried telling him this and i think hes starting to understand but he said he doesnt know what to do. i understand this and i kno its hard for him but its even harder for me! what should i do??? and i only see him like once a week so i wont see him again until friday. please help cause i love him and im trying to be strong for him and everyone but i really need him to help me. i was breaking down today (the first time in front of him) and he tried to help but then was like i have to go do hw sry. i kno its soo hard for him but i still need him. im trying not to be selfish and help him but i need him! thanks so much and i will rate

Ahhh, I'm so sorry. =[ I know how you feel, because I had to move several times when I was in school. And the same thing happened to me: as soon as they found out I was moving, some of my friends would start to act distant, like we weren't even close anymore. It was almost like I was already gone! And it was so painful, because all I wanted was to be with them and enjoy them as long as I could.

At first I didn't understand it, but eventually I realized... they were hurting as much as I was about me leaving. And somewhere in their mind, they were trying to prepare themselves for life without me. So they started the "moving on" process as soon as they knew, so it wouldn't be so traumatic when I was actually gone.

I'm sure that's what your boyfriend is going through. He's coming to grips with the fact that you're leaving, and subconciously, he's preparing himself for life without you. I'm sure he has no idea how much his behavior is hurting you... and probably, he can't really control it. It's just a defence mechanism that's taking him over.

But try talking to him (nicely) about it. Let him know that you'll never forget him, and that you want your last days with him to be as special as possible so your memories of him will be nothing but good. And however he acts, just keep in mind that inside, he's hurting as much as you are.

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ok. im 16 years old living with overprotected parents. im the type of teenager that does real good in school & never gets into any type of trouble. im the nicest girl you will ever meet. but when it comes to going out with friends & things like that im not allowed to. [im not interested in any guys at this point either.] i get everything i want, but that. i tried & tried talking to my parents about it but they never listen to me. all they do is ignore me or do whatever they can to do to not talk about it. i mean im not the type to go out & drink & do drugs. i have too much ahead of me to ruin that. but theres times where i think of running away & doing whatever i want. i just want to b happy like the rest of my friends. they take pictures & i see how much fun im missing out on. i mean its my life & i dont like having my parents telling my how to live it. sometimes i think of giving up but thats not me at all. not only that, it affects me in every way! the last place i would ever want to be is at home. i rather be at school where i dont have to fight or argue with the ones i love. basically i love my friends more than my parents. my question is what should i do with this situation of being overprotected? [help plz.]

Well, I'm sure you've realized that your parents *think* they're doing what's best for you. They think that by keeping you safely at home, they're protecting you from situations that could get you into trouble. And as long as they think this is the right thing to do, they aren't going to change their minds.

What you need to do is convince them that keeping you at home is actually BAD for you, and that going out with your friends will actually benefit you in the long run.

In order to convince them of this, you'll need to figure out exactly what they're afraid of. Maybe they're worried that you'll be around guys and want to start dating? Or that your social life will become more important to you than school and family? Or that your friends might do something bad and that you'll cave in to peer pressure?

It could be any or all of those things. But whatever it is, you need to get them thinking about this:

Pretty soon... just a couple years from now... you'll be off to college and on your own, without your parents to guide and protect you. And you WILL be around guys and have the chance to date. You WILL have the freedom to go out and socialize whenever you want. And some of your friends WILL want to go out drinking, etc.

How will you handle those situations? If you've never had any experience with it, how will you know what to do? If you've never dated before, will you know how to handle a sex-crazed college guy? Will you be able to manage your time well between studying and socializing? If your friends want to do something that could get them in trouble, will you be comfortable saying "no thanks, I'll pass this time"?

High School is a time of preparation... preparing for college, and life beyond. But there's a lot more to learn than what's taught in school and at home. You need to learn how to handle yourself in a world that's not perfect and safe and sheltered and regimented. By keeping you at home all the time, your parents are denying you the chance to learn those things. It's much better to learn those things gradually, in a more innocent environment, than to be thrown into the world with no experience to draw on.

If your parents look at it that way, they may ease up a bit and start giving you a little more freedom. So try talking to them about it, in a calm and logical way (without whining or blaming them or saying they're ruining your life). Let them know that you want to start learning to be more independent and make choices on your own... and that you'd like to start that learning process while you're still at home, so you can come to them for advice and guidance when you need it.

Good luck! =]

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I am married with two children , I have very deep
feelings for a male friend of mine. He is not
married. He had told me he was attracted to me
and that he wants to be with me. Unfortunately,
I found out that he is moving to North Carolina.
When I found this out I wrote him a letter to let him know my feelings. He never responded to the letter and never contacted me. He recently came back to see his mom for a few weeks, and he is still here. I cannot stop thinking about him. I am unable to think about anything else. I don't know if he has feelings for me or if he was
just saying that stuff to me because he is lonely.
I don't know what to do, the thought of him not
being around anymore is killing me. Please help
me figure out what to do.

Well, I wouldn't say "unfortunately" he's moving to North Carolina... I would say "thank goodness" he's moving! Obviously, you can't be around him without wanting to be with him. His moving away is the best thing that could happen.

You're married. You've made a commitment to your husband, and you've cemented that commitment further by having two children. You have a duty to your husband and children to follow through on that commitment.

Whether your friend still has feelings for you or not, I think he's doing the right thing by not contacting you. He knows it would just lead to trouble. You should take his lead and put this all behind you. That's the mature and honorable thing to do.

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what does Latin from Greek mean? Like for example, i could tell that the word "chrysanthemum" is Greek because of the "CH", but how come in M-W.COM It says that it is "Etymology:
Latin, from Greek chrysanthemon,"

So like what does the from mean "LATIN from GREEK"??? Wat the... i thought it was plain greek!?!?!??!

It means that the original or root word (chrysanthemon) was a greek word; but then the Latin speaking people borrowed it and changed it up some (chrysanthemum). The new word became part of the Latin language. Since we use the Latin version today, the word is considered Latin... but it came from the Greek.

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