asknava's advice column | Page 5

home view feedback ask questions add as friend advicenators

Website:

E-mail:

kahea2018@yahoo.com

Gender:

Female

Location:

The Universe

Occupation:

Artist, Writer

Age:

30

Member Since:

December 7, 2007

Answers:

215

Last Update:

July 3, 2014

Visitors:

20498

Favorite Columnists

Main Categories:

General Sex Questions

about

All is as it should be.

I will do my best to help you, as others have helped me.

advice

Why do people insist on bashing Michael Jackson after he's died? The man lost his life long before he died! Why can't we just let the King of Pop rest in peace now?

I went to Yahoo! Answers to ask a question about Michael Jackson and people just went nuts over him being a child molester and pedophile and how he tried to kill his youngest child (Prince Michael II) called Blanket. They kept talking about how awful he was and I wasn't even asking a question about that!

Why do people insist on this now? It's only hurting the Michael Jackson fans who are trying to deal with this grief. I feel like I can't talk about him positively without someone coming in and saying how he was such a horrible person and deserved to die. I just don't understand why people seem to be trolling about Michael Jackson at this time--when he JUST died! Help me understand?

F**K those haters! Long Live Michael!
haha you don't have to rate me I just wanted to say that!

I tried to search Google for Michael Jackson information yesterday and it said something about me being spyware or something! What is going on? I just searched about Michael Jackson since he died and I was so shocked and Google wouldn't let me! What's going on? How do I get my spyware off?!

haha yeah maybe try another time cause I have been searching him since he passed away and i haven't had a problem if you are going at like "rush hour" like right when kids get out of school or when adults are just getting home or when the news is on and people want to look up what they are saying haha that may be a bad time :)

is scrawny like someone whose really tall and thin?

They don't have to be tall, they just have to look like if you gave em a light push they would probably fall over hahahaha you know like skin and bones well usually but people use it loosly. Or it could just mean you are considerably smaller than they are, like a big football player guy may say it to his petit girlfriend :) even though she is a good weight for her height, to him she is "scrawny" :)

Someone said that Michael Jackson had something called Peter Pan Syndrome and I'm just curious why he had that. I understand that it's why he had the children at his house a lot and why he seemed childish in a lot of ways. They even said that's why he had the private amusement park, The Neverland Ranch, created.

What causes this peter pan syndrome and why did Michael Jackson have it? I'm just curious.

People need a chance to be who they are at certain times in their life, like when you were like 12 or 15 if you are that age yet, you probably started wanting to go out with your friends and be independent. When you aren't allowed to do that you kind of rebel and do the Extreme. That is what happened to Michael to the extreme. He NEVER had a childhood, he didn't even have a Teenhood, He barley had an adulthood, so he was trying mentally to have it, look at children who have strick parents, they either go and go crazy sleeping with every guy, getting drunk all the time or doing heavy drugs or they kill themselves....well michale had to live through it...so Peter Pan Syndrome hahaha Peace Long Live Michael!

I totally loved and miss Michael Jackson. I was anxious for the autopsy on Michael Jackson to be done and when it was my friend told me (because I don't have TV) that the family is requesting a second autopsy to be performed! Why?!

This makes me think that Michael Jackson was murdered or committed suicide! I mean, lots of people believed he hurt children so I understand the possibility of him being murdered is something to think about, and with all of the stress of people thinking those horrible thoughts it would make sense for him to finally snap and take his own life. I hope neither of those happened but I want to know!

What did they find out in the autopsy? Was it not cardiac arrest, which was first thought to be the reason of Michael Jackson's death?

Because people are sheisty! and they want their own doctors that they trust that will tell them the truth. That is why! i hope the come up with the real truth and handle this BS!

Michael Jackson died today and he was only 50 years old. It really took me by surprise, but it wasn't as if I didn't expect it sometime fairly soon. There have been rumors flying around for some time now about his health problems. As a matter of fact, when Michael was on trial, one day he was late because of health problems. Obviously, the judge didn't feel that Michael's health was all that important because he threatened to have Michael Jackson jailed unless he made an appearance in the courtroom. Michael showed up in his pajamas. Does anyone else remember that?

People made it out to seem as if he was faking. Some people even made it seem like he was crazy and would do ANYTHING as he was suddenly "extremely unpredictable" and all. I guess he wasn't kidding or faking about having health problems, huh?

I'm going to miss Michael Jackson. He was a man who set out to hurt no one, but the world seemed hell-bent upon hurting him. Michael Jackson was seriously the King of Pop in so many ways. Maybe he's better off wherever he is since we trashed his good name without even giving him a chance to speak. I choose to believe that he is now seated up in Heaven, seeing God for the first time.

Does anyone feel like me about Michael Jackson or am I alone in this? When I was growing up Michael Jackson was such a big role model. Sure, he was a little weird but he seemed to care and love. I'm really hurt that Michael Jackson is dead :( almost like a large portion of my childhood has been abandoned.

I loved Michael Jackson and so did my entire family and my grandparents. hahaha He will be missed greatly. Don't worry about the haters. There will always be people who hate and people who dont understand. Fact is that fame does stuff to people, you think it's hard dealing with peer pressure at high school, imagine dealing with peer pressure from the entire world! That is what he delt with since he was a kid and that life is the only one he has really ever known. I loved him and his music and I am happy for all the good he did around the world. The love he spread and the message of love. Art comes with excentricity (i hope that's spelled right) that is a part of being an artist, some people just don't get that cause they arent artists and they sure arent gifted! Pray for him to have his peace and you know he heard all of us singing his songs and being happy for what he gave us last night!~

Okay. In YOUR opinion, who are the greatest punk bands EVER created?

Well I would have to say Bad Brains cause they were like the first black punk band I believe. The Ramones cause I really like them and the Sex Pistols cause they were huge in europe. Those would be my 3.

i heard this song on the radio today. it's a rap/hip hop song [on hot 107.9 if you're in the atlanta area] i'm pretty sure they said the name of it was 'cake batter paint job' or something like that.. ha weird i know, but i can't find it anywhere on the internet. google shows no trace of it. anybody know what song this is? it's a guy singing and it must be pretty new cuz it was the first time i'd heard it.

I think it's ice cream paint job cause I remember seeing it on youtube or something, if we are talking about the same song...Is this it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yfArN-e2OU

So I gave my boyfriend a blow job, but I'm pretty sure i only let him pre-cum but I'm not positive because i definantly swallowed something. But I heard pre-cum is just a little bit of fluid so I'm not sure. So my question is, do guys usually care if you didn't go full out? or are guys just happy there getting action?
oh and hes gotten head before but the girl couldn't make him cum.

WEEEELL this is a complex question. I think it totally depends on the guy and what he is wanting. I know sometimes my guy just wants a little bit of the sensation and he doesn't want to cum. I know some people probably take forever to cum and your jaw will definately start to hurt hahaha this is what I would do...I would do a little at the begining then a little in the middle and when he is coming close to cumming I would do it then too and you don't have to swallow it you can spit it out...unless you want to, I've read it has a lot of health benifits! hahaha I didn't believe it til I read a bunch of studies on it. You'll know if he likes it if he is like looking all relaxed or if he starts moaning a little (guys don't usually moan much, I think they think it's girly hahaha they tend to grunt though when they are giving it to you...) if his legs start moving around and if he's like making faces like biting his lip and stuff or doing that open mouth thing like UGH hahaha you know play with the balls, suck the balls, kiss and lick on the inner thigh! that one works! while you are stroking it! hahahaha And read some articles on yahoo about giving good blow jobs and hand jobs. Do this one...ice cold water, hot chocolate, drink some hot and suck then drink some cold and suck and alternate! hahaha and the ice is good too take some ice out and put it in your mouth first so it doesn't stick and then rub that on there and then put it in you and then rub it on there and alternate hahaha
I hope this was the kind of answer you were looking for, that's what I got out of the question
"did I do a good job abd how can I improve it..."
Ok Peace

i'm a 19/f and i'm korean. i'm 5'6", but i love wearing heels, i try to find ones that are only 2 1/2in tall, but i always end up getting ones that are around 3-4 in. i know this is random, but i was just wondering (since koreans/asians in general) are sort of conservative) if 3-4 in heels on a girl is too high/looks bad? thanks all for the advice, i'd love both asian girl and boy opinions, thank you :)

Well I am not Asian. But I do have a lot of Asian friends, mostly guys (Korean, Japanese, Chinese, Filipino, American and Native, etc.) and I have not heard anything but "you look sexy" in my heels and what ever else I was wearing. Truth is that each person is an individual. That's like saying do black me like big butts, yeah some do but most of them will date a woman because she is beautiful and they like her personality. Even if her butt is small. So if you feel confident and sexy in the heels, then that is what you should wear. Even if you meet your dream guy and he says he doesn't want you to wear heels and you really like them ...then you know what hes not your dream guy cause you gotta be free to do what is right for you. As long as you look respectful and sexy then that is all that matters (now if you go out looking like a hoochie I can't blame the guy hahaha) Wear what you feel sexy in and the right guy for you will be there to love you for who you are. :)

how do you have sex in the water.

hahaha you just do it baby! Take off your undies and do what you do in the bed. Well naturally you can't lie down (unless you are in the bath then the girl can be on top...or the guy...in the pool though i would think it would be a girl wrap legs around body thing. Now I haven't done it in the ocean or anything but I would think that would require a little more skill for balance hahaha Peace

i feel so sad hearing sad songs want to die feel unwanted im 13 and im so lonely

Yeah I was pretty much going to say what Hector said. I went through depression and I was Depressed. I mean like months of depression. I would put on a phasade at school and around people but by myself I was a basket case, I wanted to kill myself and I started doing bad stuff to myself. I would make art that was really bloddy and put my own blood on stuff and all kind of stuff and it didn't matter what kind of music I was listening to. If you listen to sad stuff you are going to feel sad, especially if you are sad already. Sometimes though it is just sadness...Take a look at your life, try to figure out if anything is going a way that you don't want it to go...with depression, a lot of times nothing has to be going wrong you are just miserable and empty, numb and very anti-existance and anti-self. I would talk to a doctor and not just one and don't go when you are in a good mood, go when you are kind of in the middle. Cause I went in a good mood and he thought I was fine. I wasn't. I had to end up helpig my self and reading self help books...I found out depression and suicide attempts (serious ones that almost succeeded) ran in the family. Almost everyone I can think of in my family has either thought about it, written about it, self mutilated or actually went for it and just got caught before they died even to the point of having to be recisitated (that might be spelled wrong) :) Thing is that you could just be sad cause stuff isn't going the way you'd like...or maybe something happened that really got to you, it could be the influence of all the downer songs...or you could really be depressed and suicidal. I would take a test on line or go to a doctor that you trust that you can be open with...I do not recommend medication. I recommend meditation and vitamins that are specifically for calming the nervous system. I recommend therapy but I again do not recommend meds. If you feel that's what's for you then fine, but a lot of times they make people worse. :)Hope you figure it out and keep the faith, you will get through it.

It is 68 outside and 78 in here. Yet I have all the windows open and a fan going (I have no ceiling fans though). I don't understand why it is 10 degrees different outside.

I'm in a 2 bedroom apartment, what can I do to draw cold air in? Thanks.

Maybe you could change to paint color in your room. I don't know what the rules are there but I'm pretty sure that lighter colors keep it cooler. You could put the fan in front of the freezer and let that go for a bit. If it's cooler outside, you should be able to put the fan in front of the window (if you haven't done so) and it should blow in the cooler air. I think wearing something light keeps you a little cooler than being naked (if you do that) like a light cotton wrap or something like that (i don't know if you are a girl or not ) Keeping the fan going at night cause the air is a lot cooler. Maybe get some light weight and light colored curtains to block some of the sun but still allowing air to blow in. That's all I got :)

I wrote a 455 paged book. What exactly are the steps I would take to get it published?

I am in the process of writing mine right now and I have spoken to some people so I will give you the best info that I can based on what I know so far. I know that it is wise to have someone pre-edit it. It is also a good idea to have a few people read it, different types of people, people who care about you and people who wont sugar coat cause they care so much. Also you want to make sure that you have it formated properly, you may want to look up some manuscript formating tips (they have some at the books stores and on line) I know it has to be 12ft times new roman double spaced, stuff like that. MAKE SURE YOU MAIL A COPY TO YOUR SELF that you aren't going to open, that way it is copywritten BEFORE YOU GO LETTING PEOPLE READ IT or sending them copies (if you have already let people read it just go on from now) Then you can get this book of publishers from amazon.com or borders or barnes and nobles called Guide To Book Publishers, Editors and Literary Agents (I'm pretty sure this is the one but I will let you know for sure if i get to the book store before you) It is a big book full of like all the publishers and what they are looking for and their addresses, and just pretty much start sending it to the people that fit your audience. :) If you can find someone locally that has had a book published you can go to them and they will be able to give you first hand help that would be great. Ask the universe for that. :)

i know how people say write a song about the things you know or feel the most. at the moment im lonley and feeling unloved. the tune iv composed for acoustic guitar its a sweet and sort of shortish song but i would love the sweetness to be contrasted with lyricall emotion. any help please? first verse lyric sentance? your stories? anything.

thanks

Modest mouse tends to have nice songs that have kind of sad lyrics and so does built to spill. you could check them out for inspiration. What I do when Im writing is ask myself what the notes sound like they are saying. Even if I have not totally experienced it, if the notes are saying those words then those are the words I go with. You will feel it. I have a song that I wrote that was really pretty like a modest mouse style just very simple. only 7 notes all major sounding notes. And the lyrics were something like this: Well it's time to say good bye well I hope to see you again, but it's up to you, but it's up to you. You know it's hard not to lie, I make up truths to hide my mind, I think I fell for you, I think I fell for you. I said I wasn't gonna cry, when you left me behind-
you know I can't remember the lyrics that came next...but after that i repeated the first one. And it was basically about this guy that i liked that i knew liked me back but he had a girl friend that he really loved and it was one of those if i had met you first we'd probably be together sort of things...i was really sad. But the music it's self is kind of sweet and if you were in an optomistc mood you would probably not think of those lyrics. If you need to use some of it, that's cool. My initals are KNP just in case. Peace.

ok im a 13 year old persian guy with sometimes strict parents. my dad is okay with me sleeping over at peoples houses that we know, but my mom says its the " family rule " that we cant sleep over anywhere until i move out. I need help on how to convince my mom to let me go places. its like she cant accept the fact that im old enough to be staying at other friends houses overnight. I also have this good friend of mine who iv known for like 5 years and my mom wont let me sleepover there becuase she thinks his mom goes to sleep at 8 pm just becuase one time i was over there she did becuase she didnt go to sleep last night and went to work and was super tired. my mom also judges people before she meets them so thats another bad thing. i really need help!!

Thanks ,
Ashkon

I don't really know if this will help, but sometimes parents are like that because something happened to them or someone they were close to when they were little and slept over. You may want to see if you can find out if something happened that gave her a bitter idea about sleep overs. If you can find out what this is, then maybe you can take steps to sooth her attitude. Something else you may try is seeing if maybe you can have the sleep overs at your house. They can bring over their games and stuff and you can party there with the supervision that your mom wants. I know my mom was like that too and something had happened to someone in the family when she was young, that's why she was weird about it...but she was ok with me having my friends over :P it's worth a try.

what is good or bad about masturbating

IT'S AWESOME hahaha That's the good part. If you are a girl the good part is doing it in the shower with the removable head. If you are a guy...I don't know haha. I think the only bad thing is if you over do it and you are so picky about it that when you go to have real sex you are all like *psh* you dont know how to please me hahaha i think that probably happens with women more than men cause like we have like over 2,000 sensitive spots on our clit alone so when you know where to rub and the dude doesn't listen that sucks. It also SUCKS if you masturbate before you have sex cause then you might not have the energy to do it (i've had guys do that to me hoping to last longer) The other good thing is that it can help you last longer if you have uninterrupted practice! If you are like super religious then maybe it is a sin for you so that is a bad part if you think you are going to be punished for it. Another good part is multiple orgasms and not having to be concerned with the "things" that happen when you have sex with another person (we all know what they could be) :P GOOD thing....being able to be as kinky as you want to be without anyone there to judge you hahaha (wow this is a great question to answer) Having a chance to figure out what turns you on and what some of your favorite spots are. Others you will have to have a partner cause some you wont be able to reach. TOYS...of which i have none :"( Good part: doing it in your own private house. Good part: Masturbating together before you have sex! AWESOME! Watching your partner masturbate is awesome hahaha such a turn on. Helps boost self esteem. You can treat your self sexy and accept that you are and be good to your self in more ways than one. :) Ummm haha i'll leave room for some other people to answer. :P

hey there....
i have am big problem that is that i have some bad fats on my chest n belly... i have learnt to tackle with the fat on my belly.. but i have never been able to loose fats from my chest very much. so are there any good suggestion to help me.
plz don't tell me that i have that genetic problem due to which signs of mammary grands show in men because its not that.. i had been to a doctor and he said that i have got only fats on my chest. please give some boosting idease and advices. thanks.
ps- i am male/20,
i go to gym for one hour
and for swimming for one hour (suggest some special type of swimming methods if necessory)

I am not an expert...but I do know this...PUSH UPS...I can't do them...I hate them...i've trained and trained for them and I still can't do one full one ....but that will do it...now how many i don't know...i just know push up's help there. The other thing at the gym there is a like an arm machine, I wanna say it's called a butterfly or something... but your arms are in the air like you are making a muscle and you pull the weights to the front and to the back and that works that area too. looks like this (closed II open I__I closed II open I__I )Maybe someone else commenting will know the name of it. Another good thing I would imagine would be bar bells (i think that's what they are called- the ones where you lye down and lift the bar with the weights on it) because they are almost like doing a push up but you are lying down. Thing is for me that is a tough area but I hear that men have more upper body strength naturally so it may work really well for you. Also doing negative weight training (like push ups) but doing the push ups on an incline, like off of a chair or off of a wall or something like that. Hope this helps :)

I cant talk to my mom about anything, I cant even talk to her about my period because I dont fell comfortable. She was like the perfect child when she was growing up, she never wore a thong or make up, she always goes to church and has never swore, so I dont feel comfortable asking her. I couldnt ask my dad either because he just doesnt understand, I get really embaressed when ppl can see my underwear line so will you please help me and give me some pointers on how to ask her and how to get a conversation going.
Thanks a Tons!!
P.S. I dont usually get along with my mom either

well the truth is that even if you are wearing a thong people can see it...it is about the pants you are wearing. you have to say what pants am I wearing and how will the underwear apear. Because if you are wearing jeans (especially low cut or almost low cut jeans) even though you cant see the line you will have a "whale back" hahaha and that is when you are walking or bent over and the top of the thong shows and everyone knows you are wearing it. Fact is that if you have your own money then you don't have to ask your mom to buy one. All you have to do is save up like 10 bucks and go to the mall with your friends and you can get like 3 or 4 of them and just find a nice spot in your room where you can stash them where no one is going to go digging through them. Put it in there with some other panties or some scarves or something. This is what you could do too if you can't buy thongs...get panties that frill out on the sides you know stuff that is flat on the edges that way it wont be bulky when you put your pants...YOU KNOW A GREAT BRAND if you are going to get a thong...a little pricy but Hanky Panky...Flat on the edges, comfortable fit, doesn't ride you, and they are pretty wide so if they do show a little it will look like panties. Here's the real deal...you need to talk to your mom...not about "thongs and sexy stuff" necessarily, but you need to sit down and have some girl talk and keep it real like "mom, fact is that a lot of people lose their parents and they never get to bond with them, i feel like i can't bond with you becasue we are different in a lot of ways...but i don't want to miss that chance. I really need to be able to have girl talk with you, talk about boys, talk about cuter clothes, talk about life and not have to worry about you judging me or scolding me or something like that. I just need us to be two people" and I'm telling you, if she values your relationship and if she isn't like "scared to death of sin" hahaha then she should open up. It may take some time but she should at least try. I know that wasn't your question, but that to me is the real issue. You only have one real mom. :)

22/f

Hi, i work out a lot and i am not the curviest girl. However, I have hips and a booty. See my problem is a woman told me that all people who have abs or a six pack have no shape in their waist.

It really bothered me because since i am black it is assumed that I am supposed to have a big butt and large breast. I am the opposite, I am a big b cup small c cup and I have a decent sized booty. I mean i wear a size 0-2, I have always been a slender girl. My measurements are 29-23-36. But some of the people I am around think that i am too small or have no shape. Some even say that i am less of a black girl because I am not thick enough to be considered a true black girl. I didn't know that it would bother me so much. It is really getting to me. I work out and take pride in my body, but it is a bit discouraging to hear these things. Help me please!!!!!

Let me tell you something from experience. If you look in the mirror and you (and only you and your own pure thoughts)...you like the way you look, the screw what every body else says. They don't know, and you know why they don't know...I'll tell you: 1. They look at the media, and the media's idea of what is apealing is always changing based on society (which society has yet to realize) 2. Everyone has different taste. Example...Some men like really big boobs and no butt even if the boobs are fake, some men prefer small boobs just as long as they are real, some people like light skin, some people like really dark skin, some people like something inbetween, some people like you to be ALL NATURAL with all your hair and leg and arm hair and everything. Some people like you to be a little "ugly" so they don't have to worry so much about losing you. If you tried to fit everyones oppinion you will never be happy with the way you look. This happened to me several times from when I was in 3rd grade. I was never satisfied cause I always had SOMEONE telling me I was fat. at 127 i was fat, at 135 I was fat, at 160 I was fat, at 150 i was fat, at 130 I still wasn't good enough. I am happy now with my body the way I am. I am losing weight for me because of what I want to wear...but I LOVE MY SELF. I do not hate my body. I am not punishing my body for being the way it is and most of all I FEEL ATTRACTIVE AND SEXY EVERYWHERE I GO! Cause I decide I'm sexy...NOT "YOU" hahahah Hope this helps!
Peace

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>