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Sleeping over and im 13 years old
ok im a 13 year old persian guy with sometimes strict parents. my dad is okay with me sleeping over at peoples houses that we know, but my mom says its the " family rule " that we cant sleep over anywhere until i move out. I need help on how to convince my mom to let me go places. its like she cant accept the fact that im old enough to be staying at other friends houses overnight. I also have this good friend of mine who iv known for like 5 years and my mom wont let me sleepover there becuase she thinks his mom goes to sleep at 8 pm just becuase one time i was over there she did becuase she didnt go to sleep last night and went to work and was super tired. my mom also judges people before she meets them so thats another bad thing. i really need help!!
Thanks ,
Ashkon
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
as you get older you slowly should be allowed to do more things out from under your parents wing. ask her to give you valid reasons why you can't sleep over there. do some chores before you ask. make sort of a presentation as to why you think you should be allowed to sleep at someones house. let your ma know that she can meet your friend parents, and she can share opinions about it with them and vice versa. you should ask your friend to sleep over your house first, and then try to sleep over his.
tell your ma that it hurts that she judges your friends and their parents so harshly because they mean alot to you.
i hope i helped!
x sweeethoney
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If you haven't done anything to break your parents' trust then I don't see what the harm is in staying a friend's house- given of course that their parents are responsible.
Saying you can't do that until you move out is pretty extreme. Find out what it is exactly that your mom is afraid of. I'm sure that it's more than a 'family rule' I think it's fear. Maybe that you'll sneak out and do bad stuff, hook up with girls, try alcohol...who knows what.
Be totally honest with her and say 'look mom, you have taught me well. (always helps to compliment them):-),I know what to stay away from and you can trust me to make the right decisions'
Also (gently) remind her (maybe with your dad's help?) that her job is NOT to keep you so sheltered that you never learn to make your own decisions and take care of yourself. It's to prepare you to be able to go out into the world and be successful on your OWN.
People that end of being so sheltered their whole lives are the ones that more often have bigger problems later on. If your dad can help convince her that despite what she may think she's not helping you by being so strict- maybe she'll change her tune.
Good luck. Your age is a tough time but everything will get better. HTH.
RT
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I don't really know if this will help, but sometimes parents are like that because something happened to them or someone they were close to when they were little and slept over. You may want to see if you can find out if something happened that gave her a bitter idea about sleep overs. If you can find out what this is, then maybe you can take steps to sooth her attitude. Something else you may try is seeing if maybe you can have the sleep overs at your house. They can bring over their games and stuff and you can party there with the supervision that your mom wants. I know my mom was like that too and something had happened to someone in the family when she was young, that's why she was weird about it...but she was ok with me having my friends over :P it's worth a try.
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