You do have to confront him. For one, if he were begging for you to take him back, he should step up and prove that he really missed you and wants to be with you for real.

My guess would be that for some reason he may have been with someone else and it possibly didn't work out? I don't know if you knew the real reasons why he broke it off in the first place, but you never know. Maybe he got a little bored with not having a girlfriend so he took you back to possibly gain something more in his life. He could have felt empty without a girlfriend since he was with you for a while and shared all of those memories.

I know that sounds harsh, but you kind of have to consider your possibilities in the matter.

About confronting him: The next time you see him, tell him everything. Don't dance around the truth. Be flat out honest and tell him you feel that he's not acting very serious for all of that begging and pleading he did to get you back. Jusy start out as, "I feel that we have to talk about something that's making me feel upset, so it's really important that you tell me the truth because I'm telling you he truth.." and then proceed from there.


-TheTeenGirl

You will always drift apart from some of your friends. It doesn't even matter how close you once were.

This friend sounds like she's changed. She might just seem stuck up now and sometimes people will change like that.

You need to stop making calls or coming up to her first. If you've tried to make the friendship work, then you have to just walk away and move on with some new friends or catch up on old friends. If she wants to hang out with you, let her come to you, let her call you. The next time she calls and asks, just say, "I'd love to hang out, but are you going to blow me off this time?" Or something like that. It may seem harsh, but what she's doing to you is a lot harsher.


-TheTeenGirl

Having a boyfriend is a pretty special thing, especially when it comes to first kisses and just feeling so good no matter what the day brings.

I think you should let things happen the way that they are meant to. Don't rush into making out, I understand the feelings of excitement for your firsts, but what good are firsts when you try forcing it? Besides, if this guy is really ready to kiss you more or move up to the next step, then he will approach it. You both are in 7th grade. It's very new to him to be kissing girls and falling in love so give him some time to gain his confidence.

There are no 'tips' to be a great kisser. You learn to kiss from your first kiss. You don't read the books and buy the tapes to be a good kisser.

By the way, I know a great site for young girls, its www.gurl.com.

-TheTeenGirl

I know this might not help, but does it really flatter you that this guy constantly talks about how much he'd love to make out and have sex with you?

It can be flattering at times, but when a guy doesn't even care to take note of who you are and just your physical appearance it's just sickening. You aren't the only girl he's saying this stuff about incase you didn't know. Guys will say this to any girl that's beautiful or pretty that passes by.

If you want these comments back so badly, then do what you did before. Talk to him. You have to do what is you.

-TheTeenGirl

Well, I'm not a guy, but heres my thought on the matter:

Theres no reason why you shouldn't go out with this guy. You may not be attracted to him right now, but after a while if you actually start loving him, you will eventually love the imperfections and start to not care about them.

Why in the world did you give this guy oral sex? And why do we all need to know when he 'came'? We don't need to go into that much detail, about half of the teens that come on here are 13 to 16. Let's show a little maturity here.

I honestly think it was a bad decision to even go that far when you havn't even officially been out with him. Now you're freaking out because you want him and he hasn't returned your calls. I think you need to slow things down and the next time you get a hold of this guy, tell him straight up that you're interested, if anything, don't rush into a sexual encounter with him. Unless you are going for a relationship full of sex, then it's not a good idea to do that with him before you are even with him.


-TheTeenGirl

I wouldn't start worrying about your feelings being depression. You will always experience times where nothing seems to be right and you just feel like hiding forever.

Sometimes the best way to fade out these feelings are to distract yourself with TV, friends, family, or anything else.

If you really feel like everything is your fault and you aren't good enough, talk to someone. When you have these feelings, it's best to let them out so that someone can tell you the truth. Not everything is your fault. And you really are good enough of a person when you are doing your best in life. It may not seem good enough to your parents, but if you know deep down in your heart that you try very hard, then you know that you are good enough.

Sometimes it's better to take everything one at a time. Get through each hour at school. Take notes or write down reminders if you need to. You may feel too tired or stressed out to write, but it's for the best. When you get home, Go over the notes and do any homework needed and then get on to what your family needs from you. If you have some house cleaning, do it. Do everything that needs done first and then lay down and rest from everything. You should at least have time each day to relax for 30 minutes to an hour.

-TheTeenGirl

The bad news is that you won't be able to stop your dad from being a complete jerk to you. It's his house and therefore he can talk to you anyway he wants to. It's definetly unfair and wrong, but it's true.

The good news is that since you're almost 18, you will be able to get out when you want to. You may not be able to get a place of you own, but there has to be someone who you can go to to get away from your house. Plus, if your dad wanted to kick you out so bad, he might be happy to give you the money, or your mom might. Who knows, but there has to be a way that you can get out. And, you stated that there's no way to go stay with someone else, but theres not much else that people can tell you.

As for now, the best that you can do is try your hardest to stay out of your house. Go to a friends house that day, go for a walk and call someone, go outside and write in a journal, whatever you enjoy doing. I'm not trying to say that living in your house and being with your dad is easy because it absolutely isn't and I wouldn't know that. You're right, he's not just some concerned dad, he's a jerk who doesn't know how to parent at all.


-TheTeenGirl

Sometimes when you're the one being broken up with, you begin picking out all of your mistakes and what you did wrong. It's ok to point out where you messed up, but do you really think that you were causing all of the pain in the relationship you had with this guy?

I wouldn't know the answer, but you do. So if you truly believe that you can do better and make it work, then just call him or ask him in person. Just tell him that you really liked being his girlfriend and that maybe you could try again because overtime you realized what you could have done to keep things good between you both.

If you feel uncomfortable with telling him, then you should wait and maybe he'll miss what he had with you and come back. Either way, you won't sound desperate. It's very brave to stand up and ask for another chance, if he says no, don't let that get you down. It probably will, but don't worry about looking desperate. It's about taking chances, and it's better to know you tried again rather than wondering about it.

-TheTeenGirl

You need to stop worrying about Russel liking another girl or losing interest in you. For one, it's thinking too far. You have to do what is best for you.

As much as you care for your boyfriend, you have to end it. What good is it doing to be with a guy who lies, tries to control you and puts you down? Nothing. Breaking up is part of life and it's something you have to do even if you don't want to.

No more chances for this guy. Just do yourself a favor and break up with him. If you want to be with someone else, then go be with someone else. But getting back with this guy would be a mistake.

-TheTeenGirl

I want to say that he's probably just realizing that he's going to be a father, but he definetly took it too far by what he was saying.

It's one thing to be stressed out from the thought of being a father soon, but that's honestly no excuse for saying to tell your parents that the baby isn't yours and make yourself look like a slut. You both got yourself stuck in this situation and therefore he is just as responsible.

I think that you should call him and ask him what's going on at least. And if he continues his ranting, then it's time to drag your parents into it to support you and your baby. I know you're an adult and you'll be able to take care of your baby, but if your boyfriend leaves you, then you will need help with dealing with all of it and it won't be easy. It would be very disrespectful and wrong to leave you like this.

But, my true opinion is that he might be stressing and that it's all just now hitting him. But he owes you an apology for sure and if he decides that he's sticking with what he said to you, then you shouldn't talk to him until he decides to step up and be a father and apologize to you.

-TheTeenGirl

It's really wrong not to tell your boyfriend. It's unfair and when situations like these come up, you need to put yourself in his shoes and try picturing what he would want. And he would want to know upfront that you cheated.

You would too, right? Would you want to be cheated on and be unaware? No.

-TheTeenGirl

You're just upset about the fact that he's talking a girl whose not the most attractive. There are some guys out there that won't go for the most attractive girl in the room. And just out of curiousity, do you really know her enough to say that she has the personality of a plank of wood?

I doubt it. It's pretty shallow minded to think the way you are thinking. I know it's probably not as bad as it sounds in your question, but you should get over it by just accepting the fact that he talks to certain girls because they are friends. Not physical appearances. And when you get older, looks will only get you so far. I know you're aware of this, but just continue to talk to him and be his friend. If he decides that he likes her, then deal. It happens. There will be times when you'll have a crush and he won't like you in that way.



-TheTeenGirl

I think the feelings are there for the both of you. However, try remembering that this is internet dating. People can easily trick you and make you think they're as young as you are when they could really be older. I know you were probably expecting that tip, but just keep it in mind, it'll keep you safer.

Online dating can work, so try not to let people tell you the opposite. It's a rare thing, but it can work. The biggest step you'll want to keep in mind is to get to know him a lot better before you go letting out your personal information. Keep getting to know him until at least you feel safe and secure with him knowing your private issues. It may be a Christian chatroom, but you just never know about who you're talking to.

-TheTeenGirl

Your boyfriend sounds like a jerk. I know this may offend you, but aren't you starting to feel like you won't be good enough for him?

One moment he's on your back and making you upset for not having a job and now suddenly it's still not good enough?

I don't think you should sit around and try finding out what's wrong. I honestly think you need to end it with him. Now, I know exactly what you are thinking: It's not like that with him. He's done very many sweet things for you and you want to work things out. I understand that it's probably not as bad as it's sounding in your question, but it's still not worth it.

The only insight I would have on his behavior is a typical jerk who just wants to whine at his girlfriend and acting like he's better which isn't what it looks like to you, but come on now, you know that there isn't any logical explaination to this kind of behavior.


-TheTeenGirl

You aren't a hoe, a whore or any of those things. You are in love. Therefore you still want to be with him.

You both shouldn't be having sex at all if you both aren't together. If he's still having sex with you but doesn't want you to be his girlfriend then that should tell you that he's into you for the sex. Especially if he's off having sex with other girls. Do you know how dangerous that is for you? One of those girls could have an STD and you may think it won't happen, but it will if you continue to play with fire here.

Besides, do you really want to be with a guy who does nothing but uses you and doesn't even care about you? You shouldn't and you deserve a lot better than this.

-TheTeenGirl

Hey there, I got your feedback and I'd be glad to help you the best I can.

I'm not sure what it is your boyfriend would do in order for him to take you back, but if you already havn't, explain to him every detail of what happened the night you were drunk.

Explain to him that guys were coming onto you, so you had to use a friend of yours as a fake boyfriend to keep them off of you. And the only thing that happened was you held his hand to make it look realistic.

Now, the mistake on your part was him having to find out from someone else. Why didn't you come forward the next time you saw him? He would have felt much better hearing all of that from you and not someone else because then how does he know there was more that happened and he might not hear it from anyone?

So what you should have done so far is tell the truth and truly apologize to him for messing up.

And lets talk about the issue of him maybe going to jail. Listen, I know you think that waiting would be a true love thing to do, but it isn't. I think you really need to take some time for yourself and seriously get help on your self-esteem. This may hurt you or offend you and I am definetly not trying to at all, but you really don't like yourself and that's whats really the issue. Low self-esteem is the root to just about everyone of your problems.

Let me give you my very most honest opinion: You shouldn't have a boyfriend right now. Especially this guy. You're at a point in life where you're having suicidal problems and you hate yourself. That's no way to live. If you are still having an issue with it, get help first. It's not normal to be this hard on yourself with guys and dating and being without him. If you think you'll harm yourself, then you shouldn't be with someone. I know you probably won't take my advice, but I hope you take my word for it that you're not ready for these things until you start loving yourself.


-TheTeenGirl

I know it's pretty hard to handle your Ex boyfriend's response to you wanting to be with him again, but it sounds like he just needs some time and that's what you should do.

You're right, you can't change someone's mind, but you can at least stop bothering him and live life until him or someone else comes along. I'd tell you to wait for him, but it would be too painful for your to set your heart aside for someone that you may possibly not get back together with.

So on your part, you should accept his answer and move on. If you keep bothering him, he may feel cluttered and stressed out. He knows that you do want to be with him, so if he changes his mind, he knows that you're there.

-TheTeenGirl

It's probably the fact that your friend tends to get with guys who are trash and losers. Now, the thing is that you can tell her 500 times that this next guy isn't worth it, but she's not going to follow that even though it's coming from you. She just sees a guy she's into and a guy thats into her and thats it.

If anything, she's not trying to ignore your opinion or put you down by going out with a guy you don't like anyway. She's just experiencing with life as a teen and the boys.

Now you may not like the guys she goes out with, but I do think that if she wants you to read their conversations, just read them and say something and then move on. If he says something rude to her, give her advice and tell her that he's not treating her right. As for having to watch them make out, that's ridiculous. If they start making out, you've got every right to get up and go home. What's the fun in sitting there watching two people all over each other while you have to deal with the embarrassment of sitting there in the akward silence?

Jealousy might have something to do with it. But lets face the facts here: Your friend is being a girl. Dating guys and breaking up. You do the same thing except you just might be picking the guys who treat you better. Besides, even if you don't like your friend's taste, don't insult it or let it bother you. People are attracted to different people and your friend is probably not attracted to the average skinny/preppy/skater type of boys.

So the next time your friend gets a boyfriend, take the time to ask her about him and let her explain how great he is. Don't roll your eyes and think it's another loser or you WILL get caught up in those thoughts even if he turns out to be an okay guy.

-TheTeenGirl

I'm sorry, but I don't think this one will work out. Let me explain why.


People who tend to not get good grades, have piercings, do drugs and get high are people who think very low of themselves. You may think that this won't effect you now, but it WILL if you get serious with him and have a real relationship. Doing drugs and all of that ruins relationships. People who do drugs make it their lives. They'll pick drugs over anything else. And if you think that you're different and you'll have him 'whipped' that's very naiive and you should forget about that.

You are a pretty girl who gets great grades. Why would you want to sink that low to a guy who gets stoned and looks ugly? If he's ugly on the outside, then theres nothing left because hes not much inside either.

I know you're really into this guy and I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but it's my honest point of view and I think you should know.

-TheTeenGirl

This is very complicated and I'm truly sorry for all of this. But I think you are very brave person for taking on this break-up and caring for your brother at the same time.

The truth of the matter is that you can't break up with your brother for Ammi. She has to do it herself because he'd probably feel even worse that it's coming from his little sister.

I understand your concern for his reaction to the break-up and theres no doubt that he will be devastated. But, she can't stay with him because he might take his life. I think you are overthinking all of this. You need to take life one moment at a time. Tell Ammi that you do want to be there for her but she has to break-up with him herself if that's what she really wants.

I know you didn't ask for advice on your relationship. But I just want to tell you from someone whose been where you are and back, you'll make it. Crying yourself to sleep doesn't feel good, but you're healing, I promise. Just don't give up on this, you are holding on so strong and a lot of girls can't do that like you.

-TheTeenGirl

My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.

I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.

Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.

About My Ratings:
I enjoy ratings. And if I ask a question on here, I always rate the person. If you work hard to give advice, you deserve to be rated.

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