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K so a few months ago, there was this thing between me and a guy at school. He lead me on and and I initiated some as well, and he also made further plans if we could go in a date and stuff. But when it came closer to the date, a few days before it he cancelled and bailed on me and said that he just couldn't go through with it at the moment cause he still had feelings for this girl that he never went out with. So of course I felt hurt and disappointed , but eventually I moved on and find give a crap about him. But then today, he came up to me after weeks of talking to each other and asked if we could talk. He said that he did a lot of thinking and that he wanted to give us a try again and said that he was really sorry of what happened.
So he asked if we could go on a date, and of course me not wanting to say no and disappoint him I said yes... It was a spur of the moment kind of thing . So now here after a few hours of thinking I just don't have a good feeling about it.. Like now I just keep doubting that I may not have that same strong feelings for him as before ... Help !
P.s that girl and him never went out and he supposedly told me that that girl now has a boyfriend and that he and her are now on good terms and are friends (link)
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I think that you should be truthful with him. If you don't feel that strong connection to him, then tell him. Otherwise you're just leading him on.
If you want to go on a date with him, then go. But if you are unsure and you think that it might be too soon, the you should let him know. Maybe start off with going out to breakfast or getting coffee. You don't have to rush into these things. If you want a relationship with this guy then take your time and TAKE THINGS SLOW.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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so ever since 2 years ago its been hard being in a serious relationship when i guys think your a slut or some fling.... everyones like you have to change the playing field. because i like to make jokes about sex. i like being one of the guys. and i don't have sex with just anybody but if i like you a lot then i do and it comes off as if im easy? and i end up waking up to one nights stands or guys who are like its cool we can be friends with benefits.. but then again before i have sex i try to tell them i want a real relationship..and they run :S .........what to do? (link)
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If you want people to start respecting you, then you have to stop having sex. I'm sorry if this isn't what you wanted to hear but it's the truth.
If you tell a guy that you are looking for a relationship and he runs, then he's not the one.
If you tell a guy that you are looking for a relationship and he stays, then you tell him you want to take it slow. If he still hasn't run off, then you might have a decent guy on your hands.
When you're looking for a relationship, you need to look for someone who is going to respect everything about you and would never try to push you to do anything you don't want to do. And while your dating this person, NO SEX FOR A WHILE! Establish an emotional connection with that person before you jump to the physical connection.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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I like this girl, and ill be really happy if we were together. We sometimes hug, and sometimes we make eye contact and just tease each other by showing our tongue. But i still dont think she likes me, i know if i ask her out she'll reject me. I have already been rejected and it doesnt feel good, but i really want her. And other people say that she plays with her hair or her jewelry if she likes you, but she doesnt! please help tell me what to do, tell me if she likes me or not!! (link)
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Well I can't tell you if she likes you or not. You have to find that out yourself.
But don't listen to those people who say "that she plays with her hair or her jewelry if she likes you" because most of the time their wrong. I know it seems scary but you need to ask her for yourself.
I'm sure you are a great guy and she would be lucky to have you as a boyfriend. And if you do ask her and she says no, then you KEEP MOVING FORWARD until you find the right girl.
Good Luck!
~Andrew~
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I am 27 years old self-dependent working girl. i am in relationship with a guy from last 8 years. now i informed my family that i want to marry him only so they refuse my request and fixed ma marri8age with a guy to whom i rejected 1.5year back. Now the situation is damn critical for me i can’t hurt ma parents to do court marriage and not even leave ma love. That’s why i decided to finish my life....
pls suggest me some easy way to commit suicide. (link)
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What would killing yourself solve? You would just be leaving your friends and family broken hearted. I'm sure your parents would rather see you marry the love of your life than kill yourself.
And besides you are 27 years old! You can choose who you want to marry. NOBODY CAN MAKE YOU DO SOMETHING YOU DON'T WANT TO DO.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
P.S: Fight for your love.
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Over the past year I have developed some unusual ways of thinking and behavior that I have no idea how to handle. I have become more and more socially withdrawn. I never leave my house, and rarely get out of bed. My fiancé has been trying to get me to be more active socially and physically, but I somehow always end up staying home. This has gone on for over a year and has become worse and worse as each day passes. It's not that I'm scared to leave my house, I just don't want to deal with people, and I am paranoid that everywhere I go people are watching me, talking about me, and judging me. Next, I have become very unorganized. I used to be a complete control freak and now I have piles and piles of clothes everywhere, dirty dishes, food wrappers etc, and I have no interest in cleaning because I know where everything is. Next (This scares my fiancé the most) I have become very paranoid and scared about demons. I think they are out to get me. I somehow convince myself that when I open the door to my room, or the shower curtain, or when I look in the mirror a demon will appear and try to hurt me. I constantly think about this and it keeps me from getting out of bed, getting out of the shower, and looking in the mirror. When I lie in bed at night and close my eyes, I always feel like a demon is hovering over me. Or when I am home alone, I feel like they follow me around and end up running everywhere I go. The fear is paralyzing. Next, I have trouble concentrating and communicating with my fiancé and family because my head is so cluttered with thoughts. There's always a million different thoughts going on at once, some I can make out, some I cannot. Some are whispered thoughts, and some are screaming thoughts that won't go away. They all have different tones of voices, some more aggressive than others. I don't know if I am making any sense. This is my most recent symptom, and it's keeping me from falling asleep. These symptoms are starting to ruin my life and I don't know what to think of them. I know they are not normal. What do you think it is, and what are some steps I can take in dealing with this? (link)
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I'm no doctor. I think maybe you should start seeing a therapist who you can talk to. I really don't know what to say.
I'm sorry.
~Andrew~
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Ok so there is this guy named, let's say, Tom.. I like him a lot but I'm sure if he likes me. We have this one class together and we flirtin that class all the time. Like this past Thrusday we were sitting there and he was like "The only reason I like this class is becuase it's the only class I have with certain peopole." He asked me if I drove and i said yeah why and he was like I was just wondering. Then eh was like how old are you and I said 16 and he was like me too. We were watching a video this day and we talked throughout the whole video. My hands were like ice and I told him and he took my hands and held them between his and was warming my hands up and he kept touching my face and he kept touching my knee to see if I was ticklish. He kept being really flirting. Well then Friday I said something to hurt his feelings but he was just joking and he was like You hurt my feelings. You have to kiss them and make them better. I was thinking to myself, "How do you kiss someone's feelings." Then he had my pencil in his mouth and I was trying to pull it out and I couldn't get it out with my hands and he was like well you'll have to get it out another way. And we were sharing a paper and we kept getting really really close. Like he waws like an inch away from my face. Then he kept saying my hands were wet and he would hold his hand out like you would do if you were going to hold someone's hand and he was liek let me feel your hands and he said it like 4 or 5 times and I said no remember they're wet and he was like fine. Then I waited like 5 minutes and was like here. He said No remember they're wet. And lastly he out his arm around my chair like he was acting like he wanted to put it around me but was scared. HERE'S THE KICKER!!! Friday we had 30 minutes of free time at the end of class and he completely ditched me and went and hung out with this other girl and completely ignored me.He never tells me bye at the end of class and he never waits on me.And today we were sitting in the commens area for class and we didn't do anything and he COMPLETELY ingored me until like the last minute of class. He was hangin out with the same girl that he ditched me for on Friday. I think that's all. I'm so confused....I have no idea what to do. Do I pursue it or not? We're both 16 but I'm a junior and he's a freshman. (link)
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If I were you, I would not get involved with this guy. Him flirting with another girl after he's been flirting with you for a while isn't a good sign.
But keep in mind that all the flirting has to count toward something. You can't just flirt with eachother forever. You have to decide, "Do I like this guy?". Because if you keep flirting and your relationship isn't changing, then the guy is going to get bored of the idea of "flirting for no reason". If you really like him, then go get him. But me being a 16 year old guy myself, I wouldn't go after this guy cause he sounds like a player. But who knows? Maybe he's a nice guy. But that is your decision.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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Ok my situation is unique. Im a 17 year old guy. There's this girl that I've met a few times, and I've texted her for almost two years. She used to like me, but at that point in time I didn't like her. Now our positions are reversed...I told her that I like her but she said she doesn't feel the same. She's sending me a lot of mixed signals, saying "if we hung out more I might like you" but then when I said "unless you think there's any chance of us being together, I'm going to take a break from texting you", she said ok. Do I move on? Do I hang out with her more? Or do I take a break and just be her friend? She isn't someone I want to give up on, but I've been rejected so many times by other girls that I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. And I'm not antisocial, and I've been told I'm pretty handsome, but what am I supposed to believe if girls just aren't interested in me? (link)
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If a girl is not interested, she's not interested. It doesn't have anything to do with you. It just means that the girl isn't the one for you. All you should have to do to get a girl to like you is to just be yourself.
If you're changing who you are and bending over backwards just so you can be friends with the girl you like, then she isn't worth it. If you try to hang out with her more and she still hasn't changed, then you should probably move on. You can't put your whole life on hold for one person. You have to keep moving on.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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Hi im a 15 year old boy from britain.i have many insecurities about my penis.it is 4 inches long,i have a very tight foreskin and there is always some substance on the top of my penis and a green/yellow substance in my boxers everytime i check.some times the substance on the end is a crusty substance which i pick off and move on,but sometimes it is a wet substance(not semen) which smells quite bad.i am getting a hand job in 5 days and need to know if its such a problem that i should tell her i dont want to.also since i cant retract my foreskin am i causing an infection?Very nervous for a long time,and want to know if i should see a doctor..thanks (link)
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The best advice I can give you is to tell your dad what's going on. Don't tell him about the handjob, eventhough you shouldn't be getting one at your age but talk to him first. Don't get all hasty and start talking to doctors. I know this from experience. And if you feel awkward talking to your dad, go to your counselor at school if he's a guy. I don't know what's wrong but you might find out if you confide in people you know rather than strangers on the internet.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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I've been having a really hard time at school and I feel like my mom doesn't even love me anymore..I just want my world to end, but I don't know what I should do (link)
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I understand and I can relate to you having trouble in school. I just want to let you know that no one has the right or the power to make you feel inferior. DON'T GIVE BULLIES POWER OVER YOU. What happens if you kill yourself? If you have a problem with bullies at school or with certain people, then you won't find the answer you're looking for in death. You have to start from WITHIN. NOBODY CAN HURT YOU as long as you feel good about YOURSELF. What people say doesn't matter.
The things people say will hurt very much. But in the end, as long as you know God loves you and you still love yourself, nothing shall prosper against you. I really hope that you are a Christian so that way you know how much God loves you. And if you aren't a Christian, just know that there's always somebody in your corner who is willing to FIGHT FOR YOU no matter what. All you have to do is believe in him.
I didn't come here to preach. I just wanted you to know that your life means alot to alot of people. You have a chance to live and be somebody in this world. You could CHANGE lives. But if you kill yourself, you deny all of those people the chance to know who you are. DON'T GIVE UP ON LIFE and everything will work out for your good.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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Okay so I've been in a relationship for a while now and well we haven't made out yet... I think it could be because my sister had "the talk" with him and he's to scared in case my sister finds out "/ please help me! (link)
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I'm glad you asked this question. You know, it's okay if you make the first move. Relationships DON'T/SHOULDN'T depend on the guy making all the first moves and the decisions. That's not an equal partnership in my opinion. If you want the both of you to kiss, then kiss him!
Good Luck!
~Andrew~
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I’m in love with my pastor and I can tell by the tenderness in his eyes when he looks at me, that he is in love with me as well. Nothing has ever happened between us, so why do I feel such a sense of shame? God is love: At least that's how I try to justify our feelings for one another. Neither of us asked for this. In fact, we have never even spoken about it. It just is what it is and it's extremely strong.
This man is married, has children and a prominent (mega church) pastor who has thousands of women at his disposal, if he so desired to exploit his position in that manner. So, I'm having a difficult time understanding, why his heart is turned toward me. I'm having even more difficulty understanding why he has entered into my heart: 1) I am well aware that at one point or another 90% of female parishioners become attracted to their pastors (it's the power factor) but I’m not that easily impressed or captivated. 2) I am not now nor have never been a church groupie. 3) Given my past preferences, no one who knows me would ever pair me with him. He is an attractive man, just not, historically, the type that I have been attracted to. But love surpasses all things so they say, even types.
I try not to question God's ways but I can't help but wonder why He would put two people who love Him so very much through this kind of agony. The bible says that God does not tempt and that temptation is always of the devil. This is very confusing for me right now because neither of us have any evil intent for anyone affected, certainly not for one another, so how can it be of the devil?
As painful as it has been, I have joined another church and I believe that he is making a concerted effort to repair or do damage control in his relationships with God, his spouse, and with his church.
Here’s the thing, it seems like the longer I go without seeing him, the stronger my feelings become. I have been in love before and I was in a loving marriage for years, but I have never in my life fallen this hard for anyone. I have cried more in the past few months than I can ever recall. I pray about it constantly and I know that this too shall pass. In the meantime, what do I do with my feelings and how do I stop this pain? I can barely eat or sleep. I go to bed and wake up with him on my mind daily. It feels as if someone has ripped my heart out and stomped on it, still I am forced to carry it with me everywhere I go, or naturally I will die (it hurts) (link)
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You realize this man is married and has children? If God planned for you to be with this man, wouldn't you be with him now? I just don't think that God would let a man get married and have kids with one women and then walk away from that for another women. I'm not sure what your question is but I'm pretty sure this situation is tempting you. You said yourself that you say God is love to try and justify your feelings as being right. If your feelings for eachother were right, you wouldn't try to justify them.
Maybe this is temptation from the devil, or maybe God is trying to teach you something. All I know is that in your time away from this man, you should really be talking to God and just be still and listen to him. I know from experience that the world seems tempting and being christians, we can't help but to explore and experiment and dabble in things that we know are wrong but feel so right. That's why you have to pray to God for discernment and really listen to him. He may not speak to you directly, but he'll always send you a sign. You just have to notice it.
I hope this helped. You didn't give me a question so I just said what I felt you should hear.
~Andrew~
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My sister can't get anything in common with me apperantly i think shye hates me or something she is very rude and disrespectful and when she talks to me it is to be rude i think it is not fair i try talking to her but it doesn't work i buy her things and more what should i do?
(link)
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I know just how you feel. It's the same way between me and my sister. You have to let her know how you feel. And if that doesn't work then you should just ignore the comments she makes and stop buying her stuff because that's telling her that she can say whatever she wants about you and you'll still buy her gifts.
If you talked to her and it didn't work, stop buying her things. CUT HER OFF FROM YOUR MONEY until she learns how to be respectful to you.
But she is still your sister. Deep down I'm sure she loves you alot. But your relationship with her is going to take time.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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I'm 14 and I am scared to commit suicide. My reason for these thoughts are:
1. I don't have any friends at school.
2. I never had a girlfriend in my life.
3. My parents like my sister more than me.
4. My parents always get mad at me.
5. The Biggest One: I locked my mom's computer and she has to pay $200 within 48 hours, and if she does, I won't have a christmas
I just I really don't believe in God, because nothing good in my life has happened. I really want to commit suicide, but I'm afraid.
(link)
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PLEASE forgive me if I sound rude but I'm going to call it like I see it and tell you how it is.
You're afraid because you don't want to commit suicide. Because you know how much it would hurt your family. You know suicide is permanant and that your problems are temporary.
Your reasons for suicide aren't valid reasons to kill yourself. THEY ARE VALID REASONS TO KEEP LIVING.
If you don't have friends at school, then put yourself out there and make friends. BE YOURSELF. And NEVER compromise who you are just to hang out with somebody.
There's nothing wrong with not having a girlfriend at your age. I'm 16 and I never had a girlfriend before either. But I'm not upset about it. Because I know that there may be a girl in my future. You may have a girlfriend in your future too but you won't find out if you give up and commit suicide.
So what if your parents like your sister more. You keep living, graduate high school, go to an amazing college and prove your parents WRONG. Let them know that you are not a shadow but you are their SON.
My parents always get mad at me too. You know why? BECAUSE THEY LOVE ME! Your parents love you too. We don't understand this because we're teenagers. But when we become parents ourselves we start to understand every single thing that are parents ever did.
And now to your last reason. I broke an antique of my mom's. I also burnt a lunchable in the microwave before. I accidentally got a hole in her wall. I cracked one of her plates. I broke some glass and didn't do a good job sweeping it up and my dad cut his foot. WE'RE TEENAGERS! We're always going to do stupid stuff that costs our parents money. It's a part of life.
I know you don't believe in God. I'm not here to preach at you, but I wish you could know that God loves you no matter what.
I realy hope this helps.
~Andrew~
P.S: Keep living!
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am no more intrested on life ,can u suggest me easy way to die (link)
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Why are you giving up on life?
I don't care what your problems are. NOTHING is that bad that makes you want to take the easy way out. IT IS NOT YOUR TIME TO DIE! I'm not going to tell you how to kill yourself.
Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, look at the good things in your life. Think about all the people you are leaving behind. Your hurting yourself and everyone around you.
You are standing in the way of your own life and your own happiness. Think of everything you are going to miss out on in the future. All because you gave up living.
Don't stop living because trials and tribulations don't last forever. You can't have a testimony without going through a test.
Hopefully this helps you. I'm sorry if I seemed rude or mean but I've seen too many of these questions.
~Andrew~
P.S: Things will get BETTER. You just have to BELIEVE IT.
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there is 1 girl nandini i love her very much but she do not love me what can i do?i am from india. I am male my age is 14. (link)
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I'm sorry to hear this.
But you have to look on the bright side of things. Your still young and you still have a lot of life to live.
You can't let one girl stop you from living. KEEP MOVING FORWARD. And eventually, you will find the right girl.
Sometimes in life we don't get what we want now because there's something better waiting for us in our future. There may be a better girl in your future, but you won't find out unless you MOVE ON.
I hope this helps and I wish you all the best in your bright future.
~Andrew~
P.S: BE STRONG AND NEVER GIVE UP!
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im currently in a relationship with my girlfriend for around a year 3months now, due to my past e.g parents spliting up etc, im worried my girlfriend will do the same and its now putting pressure on our relationship. how can i stop the past in my head. (link)
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Well the past is in the past and that's where it needs to stay.
Your parents' relationship is not you and your girlfriend's relationship. Every relationship is different. I know how sometimes people use other people's relationships as a template for their own. But the problem with that is when that template is gone, you feel lost. You feel like your relationship is on the same path as the other relationship because you follewed it's example.
Basically what I'm trying to say is that you and your girlfriend don't have to split up because your parents split up. Your relationship is what you make of it and what you put into it.
So in order to stop the past in your head you need to focus on your present. Enjoy what you have and don't worry about what it is or what it's not. Love your girlfriend because you LOVE HER, not because you don't want her to leave you. Love her out of love not out of FEAR.
DO NOT BASE YOUR RELATIONSHIP ON ANOTHER COUPLE'S RELATIONSHIP because you don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
I really hope this helps and I wish you and your girlfriend all the best and many years to come.
~Andrew~
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I'm 11 years old and have a boyfriend and I ALWAYS invite him over and go on dates with him. 1 year ago we had our first kiss and I feel weird knowing that I kissed someone I met only for three days! anyway, every time I lock the door of my room so we can talk privetly my mum screams out loud "MY DAUGTER IS HAVING FUN SEX!" she thinks that we have sex but we oblivesly don't ! how do I tell my mum we don't have sex? (without saying "just say mum we don't have sex were too young" because I already tried !!) (link)
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One simple solution to this problem.
1. Leave your door open
or
2. Don't take him to your room to talk. That's what the living room is for. Get him to know your family a bit more and maybe you won't feel the need to hide in your room
I hope this helps and good luck!
~Andrew~
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Hey guys :) so I'm a freshman this year, and my best friend since third grade has come to the same school with me. We were so excited about it and we have always wished of going to the same one! We have most of our classes together. Anyway, it seems lately she's been almost ignoring me. I'll talk to her and I usually only get a few word answers and sometimes I get that look when people scrunch up their forehead looking at you like why are you talking to me. It happens a lot when she's around other friends. But when I'm texting he or messaging with her and no other friends are around, she acts normal. She seems to be hanging with people that I see make her stand out. (not saying there's anything wrong with standing out) also, the boys at our brother school say she's the most hottest beautiful girl at our school. Yet, shes constantly calling herself ugly. I feel like she's only doing it though to get attention but I could always be wrong. I can be a bit of a goofball sometimes but I know for a fact that I have definitely mattured coming into high school.and when I ask her to video chat with me or hang out, there's almost always an excuse that I find out that's not true and she's really video chatting with other friends or hanging out with them. I know that there's nothing wrong with having other friends an I don't consider myself the jealous type, but I feel like she ditching me. I'd do anything for this girl and I feel like she's ditching me. I alsomt went to a dance with a boy that's extremely mean to girls just because she didn want to be alone with her date. I go out of my way and do so many things for her. Do I ask for anything in return... No. Do you think my friend is ditching me to be popular and get noticed by boys? Or am I just over reacting? I hate the fact that I might have to find a new best friend because we've always been stuck like glue to each other. Any advice??? Xoxo (link)
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To be honest I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who doesn't act like my friend. If you want to find out where your friendship with this girl lies just talk your friend and tell her how you feel.
People change in high school. And sometimes friends stop talking to eachother for no reason. They just grow apart. If your friend wants to go, let her go. You shouldn't be chasing after a friendship that is no longer beneficial to you.
YOU'RE A FRESHMAN! It's time for new beginnings and maybe new friends.
I know this isn't the answer you wanted but I hope it helps.
~Andrew~
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okaay, so on the buss i sit with my bestfriend...my partner in crime. but shes been making me soo mad lately idk what to do. My Boyfriend and her dont get along AT ALL!!! on the buss we do stupid stuff like picking out what would be good fights, and my boyfriends name was brought up and she keeps saying her boyfriend beat up mine anyday no question about it. and its been making me so mad. i sit there and ignore it. but i dont wanna tell her that shes been making me mad because i dont wanna loose her or my boyfriend they both mean soooo much to me. I want her to stop but idk how to tell her. what do i do? and what do i say? (link)
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I think you should just tell her the truth about how you feel. If she gets mad at you for telling her that what she says upsets you, then maybe you should find a new friend who will respect you.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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I've been friends with someone for about 2 years, and we finally got together, which was great! However, he broke up with me after about a week (yeah, I know i got played haha), but that's not what's upsetting me. I was talking to someone that's a mutual friend between my ex and I, and it looks like he was "talking" to others behind my back, WHILE we were dating. I'm just wondering on what I should do about this. Should I confront and ask my ex about this rumor, or go on as if it doesn't bother me? (Even though it does) Thanks and I appreciate it! :) (link)
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Well you guys aren't dating anymore so you asking him about the rumors would do nothing but give you a reason to be angry at him. If he is your EX Boyfriend than it should stay that way.
You can find better guys anyway.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
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