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Pluto

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waterbender =D haha, I'm such a nerd.

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18

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July 7, 2005

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September 21, 2006

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Hi. I left and came back. But I don't like this column anymore. Check out my new column.

http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=thefish

advice

Ok so i have a friend Maria and i have a crush Adam. I have liked Adam for so long and one day Adam telles my bestfriend Maria that he likes her. I am totally emotianal. What should i do? I need serious advice on this one.
~Andrea~

You can not change the way Adam feels, and you cannot blame Maria for his feelings. For now, all you can do is this. Make little voodoo dolls out of both of them, but don't actually bewitch them. Stab pins in them. Throw them at the wall. Smash them. Drown them. Strangle them. Beat them against the table. It's okay to be jealous (I get really jealous, really easy!!), but you must vent that jealousy in a healthy way. It is healthy to beat up fake voodoo dolls. It is UNHEALTHY to start a dramatic conflict and a couple of fist fights with the people you care about.

EDIT: I don't always bitch about this. Usually, I let it go. But why is that a ONE? I know exactly how you feel about this situation, I've been there...I AM there at this moment. I was telling you a way to deal with it, because it's true, you CAN'T do anything to change it...unless you want to hurt people in the process.

OK so right now is my first year of highschool and i like 3 guys from my tennis class and this guy from the movies and 3 other guys in JROTC..they all say they like me but what am i supposed to do because i like all of them alot ill rate high and just to let you know im not a fan of cheating on someone

Okay, don't worry about it. You're not gonna end up cheating on anyone. It's not like you've pledged your heart to all three; they're all still at the adolescent crush level. Atleast I hope they are...they sure sound that way. It's fine to like more than one person at the same time. I've had crushes on like, ten people at once before! For that part, you don't have to worry.

Now, who to go out with? I say none of them. Yes, it's fine to have multiple crushes, but if you can't decide which one you like most, you're not ready for a relationship. You'll go out with Taylor, but you'll be regretting it and constantly thinking, "I wish I went out with Mike instead." See what I mean? The best thing to do would be to hold back on starting a relationship with any of these boys. Be friends for a while. You might discover something about one of them that you really don't like and you'll be thanking whatever God(s) you believe in that you didn't go out with him! It might be like...Taylor has hit his previous girlfriends, and Mike smokes pot. Buuut...Steven is totally perfect for you in every way! So, until you can decide which one you want to be with, don't be with any of them. In the end, it will work out best for all four of you.

EDIT: I beg your pardon, I didn't realize it was seven guys. In this case, multiply my above advice by eight.

And try to focus more on your school work than guys. I am a senior in high school and you have no idea how much I wish I could do it all over again, and focus more on work.

Don't get me wrong, I love my mom, but I don't think she feels the same way. See, I'm a 9th grader, and along with school, I also have a part-time job that ends at 6pm. Then when I get home I have to do homework, then my mom makes me take out the garbage, unload the dishwasher, fold laundry, clean my room, and dust. By the time I'm done it time for bed.

My mom doesn't treat me like Cinderella and make me do everything, but its sooo annoying when she's makes me do these things when she's off the whole day and she does NOTHING. How can I let her know I need a lighter load?

This is probably not the most responsible thing to do, but I usually just break down and cry, and tell her I'm so stressed out it's physically making me ill (it's often true), and she hugs me and tells me it's all right and buys me some books and lets me stay home from school. I haven't done that in a really long time, but um...yeah...that's what I've always done. :/ It probably won't work. You can have a serious discussion with her, maybe. Tell her that you need a life, because technically you're still a kid. If you are mature about it and do the opposite of my first suggestion, she'll probably see to reason. If nothing works, you may have to quit your job. I mean...what good is that money if you don't have any free time to spend it, right? I'm sure her working you hard isn't because she doesn't love you. Obviously she loves you, or else she would'nt have given birth to you. Or, if she's not your biological mother, then she wouldn't have adopted you. Try to forgive her for her faults, discuss the situation with her, and relax. And when you have your own kids, don't repeat her mistake. Or have a lot of kids, and that way you can divide the chores evenly, so it won't take all night. Ta!

when i talk to people i cant keep a conversation going or even get a good one going.. what tips could u give me for this?

Find more interesting people to talk to! You know, like people who are into the same things as you and that way you can keep talking. Or you can continue not talking. My friend and I don't talk much...we sort of communicate by looking at each other...yet, we love each other, get sick of each other, and then love each other again...just like normal talking-to-people friendships!!

13/f Okay..for the girls you may know what I'm feeling here..

Well do any of you other girls ever really want a boyfriend? Well that's the way I'm feeling..I mean lately I just feel..ugly. I mean no guys at school like me and today a few guys asked me out but I know(at least I think) that they were kidding. And in a few weeks I will be going to Cedar Point with my friend for her birthday and she's bringing two of her guy friends. She's saying that me and her guy friends would make such "cute couples" but I don't know..With my luck, they probably won't like me.

I don't know..I guess I'm just really self-concious about this..When I look at other girls, they are so pretty and it makes me feel like I'm as ugly as dirt.

And all of my friends think I'm pretty but I don't. I think I'm fat and that I'm totally unattractive.

If you need to look, I'm about to go upload a picture of myself onto my advice column

Does anyone know why I'm feeling this way? I understand that it's probably hormones but..

Thanks in advance for any helpful advice.

*hugs* Sweetie, I felt that way for a long time! Like from when I was thirteen to when I was sixteen! That's like...*counts*...THREE YEARS! I'm not entirely over it, and I'm seventeen now. Don't worry, it's normal to be insecure, but you have to work to get over it! =) Good luck!!

ok im a virgin and i am 18 and my boyfreind / fiance is 22 and he has had 4 partners prior to me. also he has told me he is pretty big down there (normal sized condoms wont fit him) i havent actually seen it yet, but i am a virgin. i havent had any kind of contact in a sexual way at all and i want to have sex with him because we are so in love and getting married soon and all, but im afraid he will be too big and it will hurt alot. is there anything that the two of us can do to make our first time togheter (and my first time ever) more pleasurable and less painful for us?

Foreplay! He can't just stick it in and that will be that. You guys need to get in the mood, groping, making out, handjobs and fingering. I stress the part about the fingering. If you are used to his fingers in you it will be easier when he puts his penis in you. Also, you should masturbate before you do this because it is best to know your own body before you go sharing it with someone else.

I'm sooooo pissed off at the world right now!!! I can't talk to anyone about anything! Nobody knows how I feel... or what I'm going through... Sorry if some of this doesn't make sense, I'm waaaaay too frusturated to think!!!

13/m I'm going through puberty, I know it. Nothing physical yet. I'm still short. My voice is still insanely soprano. I don't have any acne yet. No facial hair. But I'm feeling everything mental. I'm getting smarter, I must be since I've been suddenly getting better at chess. And I'm experiencing every one of these what I like to call "true emotions": from love to infatuation, from rejection to jealousy, I'm feeling it all. I can't even remember everything else, I'm so distraught!

Now, if I had someone to talk with, things might be better. But my friends are only going through physical and not emotional/mental so far, except for those two guys who're obsessed with "is she hot?" right now. So many Advicenators are so obsessed with all that 13-year-olds-can't-love crap that their advice winds up getting me more depressed than it does help me. My parents figure that if I haven't physically changed, I couldn't possibly be mentally changing, and so they just tease me about it. I tried keeping a journal, but I'm not good at that stuff. And I'm way too busy to see a therapist or something.

I'm soooooo pissed off at the world, my life sucks. I shouldn't even bother living or making my regular jokes anymore. I'm nothing anymore... please help me!!!

~~Dakmor

PS Smartasses will be reported!!!

This is going to go on for a while. You just have to live through it. Don't say that nobody else feels like you do...EVERYONE FEELS, HAS FELT, OR WILL FEEL THIS WAY. Believe me. It's LIFE. Life is not meant to be easy and enjoyable--it's meant to be a painful, emotional torture. Please believe me when I say everyone goes through it! Stressing the way you are is just going to make it worse. Try your hardest to just accept other people for who they are and be patient with them and above all, RELAX. Seriously. Don't think you're nothing, because you are something--you are a beautiful rose bud about to bloom! I know that sounds ghey, but it's true. IT IS!

can someone get your ip addres from aim/aol. And if they do can they mess with your computer and give it viruis. My friend told me that they can. Is he right?

They might be able to get your IP address but they most likely can't do anything with it...if you're that worried, get some firewalls. Advicenators knows your IP address and probably a lot of other websites do, too.

One of my closest friends just recently admitted to me something that I found quite disturbing.

She told me a couple days ago " no offense, but my cats are more important to me than any of my friends or family.

She said if her house were on fire the first thing she would grad were her cats, and not her parents or friends!!

I didn't say anything but I was quite upset. I would always pick my friends and family over my pets.

Am i overreacting to being upset?

Eh. I think it's an over-reaction. I mean, you and her parents would probably be able to get of the fire on your own. The cats can't open doors and don't know to get out. They are helpless. I say still be her friend and don't be hurt by this, and don't waste too much emotion on her because you know she won't return most of it.

how is a number divisible by 4?

Uh...four times anything is divisible by four...and four is divisible by four, and one. It's really simple.

Do females find guys with ape like hairy chests sexy?

I wouldn't be like, "Oh my gosh, he has a hair chest! I wanna have sex with him!!" but if he was my beloved one, his chest wouldn't matter, as long as he closed the toilet lid.

this might be crazy, but why r guys stalking me everytime? lol

If somebody is stalking you, you should totally tell the police!

does anyone know a few really good websites with good anime/manga pictures...preferably girls?

i rate 5 for good sites!

I don't know any websites but I know a kickass manga artist, YU WATASE. Actually, there is a website called animegalleries.net, but I suggest you look up Yu Watase as well. Also, search for Love Hina by Ken Akamatsu. If you use a search engine for these things, you might get some good websites. On Deviantart.com, a lot of people like to draw anime.

15/f

I have two best friends. One (shelby) has her sweet sixteen coming up in december. She has planned on just spending time with her mom, but my other best friend ( christa) and i know thats not what she wants to do. Its just something that her mom made her feel guilty about. Well we decided we are going to throw her a surprize sleepover in my basement, somewhere around her birthday. My question is, I dont know exactly where to start. I also need ideas for what to do. This party is coming totally out of christa and my pocket (with a little help from out moms) so It cant be expensive. Any help would be appreciated!

Balloons, soda, movies (I like La Secunda Noche, Moon Child, Young Frankenstein, and the Urusei Yatsura movies but maybe you don't so go with what you like), chips, put some CDs on and dance like crazy, and...um...video games!! Like Harvest Moon. Yeah, that would be fun...

Husband doesn't care about other relationships. Said not to "cross the line". But unable to be there until retirement... in 20 or more years. Promised kids not getting divorce. Hubbie says it's not an option anyway. Fell in love and have relationship with another man. What to do. How do I deal day to day?

You have to pick your husband or the other man. You can't go on this way. Your husband can't force you to stay married to him, if you really want a divorce then get a good lawyer and make it happen. Your husband might be cheating on you as well, since he seems controlling. The fact that he said not to cross the line shows that he's never trusted you. So, yeah...get a lawyer.

I basically wear jeans and a tshirt every day. The only other type of pants i wear are cackis and one pair of camo pants.
How can i make a tshirt and jeans look cuter and more fashionable. Like, is there any cute/cheap jewelry or purses.. something to that extent THANKS!

I just want to know why only girls can answer...guys can know about fashion too!

Anyways, you can use fabric paint on shirts, patches on jeans, that sort of thing. You could cut up some old clothes and sew the peices onto a pair of jeans you want to wear...like if you have a lacy shirt, you can sew the lace to the bottom of the jeans' legs. Accessorizing is a good idea too, so it's good you thought of jewlery. You can find jewlery ANYWHERE from Wal Mart to Hot Topic to Claire's to...some shop downtown!! Hemp necklaces are nice, and there are these necklaces with like, silver balls. Get arm-warmers, too. You can also wear a long-sleeved shirt under a T-shirt, it looks pretty nice.

okay i have few questions....
how old to you have to be to legally have sex?

even if you have a condom on can the guy ejaculate while still inside the girl and not get pregnant? also even if you withdrawl before ejaculation... can you still get pregnant even if you have a condom on?

i rate please answer

It depends on where you live. In most places, the age of consent is 17 or 18. But like, in Hawaii, I think it's 14. However...if you're a sixteen-year-old having sex with your 19-year-old boyfriend (and I mean, it's a SERIOUS relationship, not like you just think he's hot so you make out with him), you can still have sex...the laws aren't really enforced that much, it's just to protect twelve-year-olds from being raped. And yes, even if you use a condom, you can still get pregnant because sometimes they break. In fact, condoms aren't really made to prevent pregnancy, they are more for STDs. Birth control pills will prevent pregnancy but they will give you heart problems. I know everyone hates to hear it, but the best way to not get pregnant is to not have sex.

I usually dont eat much. I eat maybe one small thing for breakfast and half of my lunch. I usually dont eat dinner. I usually exercise everything off if I eat a huge lunch or a huge dinner. I constantly worry about how much i weigh but im too scared to weigh myself cause im scared of the effect itll have on me. I usually exercise regularly. I run a mile a day, 30 pushups, 5 minute wall sit, and tons of other things. I'm also involved in Cheerleading so that kind of also is an excuse for me to exercise more often and burn off any fat. Ive been getting sick easier lately and idk why ive been sick for like 2 weeks now. Am i anorexic or what?

Oh also ive noticed my legs are smaller and so are my arms.. and ive noticed other things but i need oppinions i rate 5s. kthanxbye!

You do sound a little anorexic. Eat more, sweetie!

Today I went on a walk. I live in the country in Ohio and I didn't think that people would litter on my road because it is wayyy far out from the city. But anyways, I was walking and found a whole bunch of ciggarettes(already used) lying all over the side of the road, and I got curious.--This isn't the first time I have thought about smoking. I've thought about it before because my friends sisters friend smokes and yeah. Also, I wanted a secret, so I thought about drinking and smoking because I am such a goody goody and everyone thinks that I am all perfect and what not.--So anyways, I picked up the ciggarette and I took a puff. I threw it on the ground and put it out really fast. But the thing is, I really liked the feeling.--Now, I'm asking your guys' oppinion. Does it seem like I am only doing this to have a secret? Or does it seem like I'm doing it because I'm curious and I actually want to smoke? Or is there another reason?

I'll rate

You're probably just curious about it. I always used to picture myself smoking when I got older because everybody around me smoked. But please, please don't smoke. I can't control your actions but...my mother is totally messed up because of smoking. She is sick right now, coughing and such, and trying to quit because it will make her illness so much worse. But when she doesn't smoke she gets all MOODY and horrible to be with, more so than usual!! Plus, it gives you holes in your brain. You should try meditation, or burning incense instead. *sigh* I know you did not ask for a lecture, but I can't help it. Sorry. But you seem ashamed that you tried it so I don't think you're in danger of doing it again. Of course...there is nicotine...

my labia is larger than most of them..it never rele bothered me until now..im beggining high school and the topic of sex is coming up..i think im rele ready..but im a tad bit insecure..do guys still find gurls with elongated labia attractive?? thanx a bunch!! =)

I think it's pretty well accepted that the males of our species are generally dense as a fog. They won't notice your eye color. They won't notice if you've lost weight or gotten a haircut. They don't even realize why leaving the toilet seat up is a mortal sin! So I doubt they will notice your labia. Actually, they will probably be shaking in their boots (hmm...having sex while wearing boots! that's a new one!) that you don't think their penis is too small.

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