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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Does ambulance charge just to come check a person at home and see whats wrong
A commercial ambulance might. Most 911 ambulances only charge if they transport.
I'm M/15. lately I feel like I've been going crazy. I want to change. I think girls don't like me because I'm weird. I talk about Aliens, underground military bases, alternate realities and weird types of science. I always say that nothing is impossible. I yell at my stupid internet connection. I've been being racist lately (not extreme, just jokes & stuff) I like saying things backwards like "The mirror looks at me" "The test got 100 on me" "Ball Basket plays me" "Outside hot is very" . Aso last 2 weeks I've been slackin' off in classes. I do accents constantly. I avoid people because I think they're daft, or too slow to understand me, but same time I tend to be slow. I'll say random stuff like, " I missed the shot because I'm nice like that" I listen to weird music Metal & underground rap about conspiracy theories & weird stuff involving science & history to create weird stories. People don't understand me, girls don't like me. I can't find any weird crazy ones :(Am I crazy?How can I change? The list goesOn
Hi, i"m old enough to be your grandfather and hopefully the wisdom that comes with being my age will lay your fears.
From what you have written you sound like a pretty typical 15 year old male. Your not satisfied with just playing inside the box, being a stereotype. While you may seem weird to many so did many of the great inventors and minds in our history.
I am not saying you will go on to find the cure for the common cold or become the next Einstein or even the next Bill Gates. What I can tell you is there is nothing wrong with thinking outside the box. Great problems are solved by those who think outside the box.
No, your not crazy your just not the stereotyped teenager your friends are or other teenagers are. Yes they may think you strange,or weird but that's because your not like them. If you want to be like them then that is something you have to decide for yourself; it is not something I would ever tell you to do.
This could also be a phase you are going through, sort of your way of handling all the pressures and changes brought on by puberty. In time you will tire of these things and change to the more stereotype individual. Personally I would hope you retain some of the outside the box thinking you currently have. As I have said, it is those people who have the ability to think outside the box that bring about the solutions to major problems.
My advice: relax, enjoy being you. You are a unique individual.
How do I tell if the e-mails I am getting about donating to Japan's disaster relief are real, honest charities that aren't out to scam people?
I want to give, but I don't know who to trust and I don't want anything to do with the red cross for my own reasons.
Thank you!
I understand not giving to the Red Cross, I too have my own reasons for not giving to them.
I would not donate to any unsolicited e-mail I received as there are many scams out there trying to make money off of this horrible situation.
If you want to donate something I would suggest the Salvation Army, any of you local Churches or Temples that may be collecting for the relief effort. Many of the supermarkets have also set up for you to donate for the relief effort as have some banks.
Again as for on line solicitation, ignore them.
Since yesterday after my dinner, I've been having sharp pains going up my spine, followed by more pain in my stomach, giving me breathing problems. Last night, the pain was so bad that every time I did move, it woke me up immediately and I was cringing. I also had difficulty using the bathroom. I was given stool softener to see if it would help, but it hasn't. I can't tell when I have to use the bathroom either because of the pain and I was just able to urinate a couple hours ago for the first time since yesterday without there being pain. I have no idea what's going on. All I ate yesterday was two regular coffees, a simple sandwich at Jimmy John's, a Southern Style and BigMac with fries at McDonalds. Today all I was able to eat was carrots and strawberries before I got sick to my stomach even more. My stomach is also making weird noises constantly. I don't know if helps, but I've also been having an irregular period, lots of spotting, and very heavy for eight days when I actually do have it.
The pain is getting so bad that I'm limping and having problems getting comfortable as every position makes me feel like my lungs are crushed, my stomach gets even more upset, and my bladder area. Any ideas of what's going on?
None of us are doctors and are not allowed to offer medical advice.
Trouble breathing, urinating and moving your bowels are all serious conditions with trouble breathing being most serious.
I am a first responder with a fire department rescue squad; my advice is that you need to be seen at hospital ASAP.
Pick up the phone and call 911 now. Tell the call takers the symptoms as I outlined and they will send San ambulance.
I want to know what happen when you report a drunk driver, but maybe he/she wasn't drunk. But the thing that I really want to know is what happen when you report a drunk driver, what do the cops do, or what are the consequences. and another thing that want to know is what happen if there was a mistake when a person report a drunk driver but didn't see him really well, so maybe she made a mistake. Can you answer me this question please?
The officer will determine if a person is drunk or not after making the traffic stop. Before making the stop the Officer does observe the persons driving as they need more than your word to make the stop; they need personal,observation. If the person is drunk they will make an arrests. From there it becomes a for the courts.
If the person is not drunk or under the influence of drugs the officer will inquire if the driver is in ill health or overly tired an should not be driving. If the person is sick medical help will be summoned. If the person is just tired the officer will most likely direct the driver to a motel or a rest area to take a nap.
If nothing can be found to be wrong the officer apologizes for the stop and sends the person on their way. At no time are you mentioned or are you in any trouble for making the report. The police prefer that suspected drunk driver be reported than not and then have to respond to a traffic accident caused by that driver.
Okay so last night me and my boyfriend were talking. I asked him what he first fell in love with, and he said it was my personality. He said I'm not cute, but I'm pretty, and later said if he was in this relationship for looks, he wouldn't have said yes.
I am an over examiner. I think too much over tiny things. But what he said really hurt. It makes me feel like I am ugly. I am so self-conscious now. I don't want to feel that way. He's my boyfriend! I should feel my prettiest around him! I told him I was confused and he said, you're not ugly, just not the prettiest girl I have ever seen.
Which confuses me because he calls me beautiful and sexy and fine and I'm like ?
He's really got me stumped. Is he saying I am ugly or am I over examining?!
Hi, I'm old enough to be you your grandfather and I would like to give you my views on what your boyfriend said.
First he said he fell in love with your personality first. You should feel lucky that you found someone who was not looking for some empty headed skin deep beautiful person to love. He was looking for the real person, the person that resides just below the skin. Sex and sexual attraction can only hold a relationship together for so long. He also said you were pretty. You are offend that he didn't say you are cute. The word cute has many definitions.
I believe being pretty has it over being cute. I don't think you should be offend if someone considers you pretty but not cute. Especially after you think about how many different ways we use that word.
You are very luck to have found someone who wants to know and love the real you. He calls you sexy and beautiful, which you are. Why over examine things. Just enjoy being with your boyfriend who loves the pretty girl and the person you truly are.
I need to loose weight really quick. I already do soo much physical activity so working out is totally not an option. I am a 13 year old girl. Is anorexia a bad idea? Bullemia? please help.
The previous answer tells it best. Anorexia and Bulimia are eating disorders that can and will permanently harm you if they don't kill you. I can't make it any plainer than that.
You say you are physically active. If so the weight you are trying to loose may very well be muscle weight. Before starting any diet see your family doctor to see where you are on the weight chart. If your weight is muscular weight, which is heavier than weight from fat, you do not need to go on a diet. You need to properly exercise to tone your muscles.
Please remember one thing about dieting: You never start a diet without first checking with you doctor and never diet without being under a doctors supervision.
i used to be able to connect to the internet on my ipod, but latley, it wont let me. anytime that i try to connect to my wifi connection, i try to type in the password, but when i do, the "join" button turns gray, and i can't do anything.
does anyone know what the problem could be?
This happened to me; while it eventually cleared itself I would suggest you take it to Apple for repair.
My fix was to purchase an ipad after syncing the ipad and then syncing the ipod the ipod began working again. I had tried syncing the ipod several times without any success before I bought the ipad
15/f
I started looking at, well I wouldn't nessicarially call it porn, but I guess you would. But I have been looking at "porn" since I was like 5....nothin ever happened...and its not a girl and guy, its 2 men...is it normal that I look at it at my age? Or am I like some weird girl pervert? I mean I have a whole collecton on my phone and computer and only my 2 friends that I know really really well and sister and brother know...and they have never told my parents...so was it normal of me to look at 2 men doing it when I was 5 and is it normal now?
P.s...this is probably in the wrong catogorie...
Hi, I'm old enough to be you grandfather. My view on your question is this.
When it comes to sex and things related to sex my feelings have always been; as long as no one gets hurt and both parties, or in this case you enjoy it, and are consenting. There is nothing weird or wrong with it.
Men and boys get off watching two girls making love; so I can see where a girl or women would get off watching two men making love.
My view: As long as you are not forcing anyone to watch this with you, enjoy yourself. Just make sure your door is locked so you parent can't walk in on you. If you feel like masturbating while watching; this too would be normal.
18/f. My boyfriend and I are starting to think about sex. We have been dating 7 months and are in love. This is a question about preventing pregnancies, so please don't lecture me on "saving my virginity" because I already had sex once and it's what I want. I do realize the consequences. Getting pregnant and STI's. But my boyfriend and I have agreed that we are going to be safe and careful.
Here's my question
Ive never had birth control before. The first time we had sex we used a spermicidal condom and a few days after that I saw an article about teen pregnancies in a magazine and in a tv show. I started to freak out and get really scared but he didn't cum in me and also he wasn't deep. Only like 2 inches. Do you think its possible for me to get pregnant if he did that?
Anyways, after my freak out we had a talk and decided I should get birth control. But heres the catch, my parents can't find out. And also I have no idea where to get any. Do I have to take exams in order to get some birth control?
Last question. Do you think it's safe to have sex without the pill? Like if we used a spermicidal condom and Super careful. We know the proper way to use it and how to check for leaks and tears. Like do you think if I didn't get the pill, would the condom still prevent 98% of pregnancies?
Also my boyfriend mentioned the morning after pill (plan b I think?) how effective is that? If I didn't get the pill and just used condom and then morning after pill if there was a leak, would that be ok?
1 more question- could I get pregnant if we used a condom but the condom doesn't break, is there a chance of pregnancy?
Oh and I prefer not to use any other female protection method. I don't want to use a cup or anything.
Amy more advice or tips? Thanks!!
Hi; I'm old enough to be your grandfather. Hopefully the wisdom of my age will be found useful.
The idea of going to Planned Parenthood is a good idea. The following is the website to use in finding a center near you: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-center/findCenter.asp
I would also suggest you visit their main website page before you visit one of their centers. The opening page has a great deal of information that will answer almost all of the questions you have asked. the link is : http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control-4211.htm
You will find in reviewing the information provided on the Planed Parenthood home page is that condoms alone are not a very effective form of birth control.
Condoms are very effective in preventing the transmission of STDs and the AIDS virus when worn correctly. Until you are in a long term monogamous relationship you should always make sure the man wears a condom. Even when you do enter a long term relationship until both of you are tested a condom should be used.
A properly worn condom and a female contraceptive are the most effect form of birth control. Review the information of the Planned Parenthood website then visit one of their centers or your own doctor to be prescribed the best form of birth control for you.
I am ten years old and i am really worrid about when i might get my pired any help? Also my left boob hurts what should i do?!?
P.S. HELP
Hi; I'm old enough to be your grandfather. Being the father of a boy I'm not truly qualified to answer your question. I do have some advice to offer you in general.
While it may be comforting to ask others about their experiences concerning puberty and what they experienced. Each of us are unique individuals. Meaning; something you are experiencing may have the same feelings or symptoms of any of the young ladies on this site. It does not mean that what they experienced is what you are experiencing.
The best authority on what may be going on with the changes you are and will be going through is your mother and your family doctor, in that order. They know you the best. Mom has gone through everything you will go through and what is and will happen is totally normal. Meaning, there is nothing to be embarrassed about.
You need to sit down with you mom and tell her what is going on. She is probably waiting for you to come to her so she can help you with such things as a training bra and the correct use of sanitary napkins. She will also be able to tell you what pains you will feel that are normal and what pains she need to know about so that she can decide if you need to see a doctor.
This is what a big part of being a parent is all about. Teaching our children about life. We have gone through what our children are and will be going through. As fathers we have chased are share of girls and women. As mothers, they have experienced the growing of breasts, the on set of menstruation, boys who are all hands. Mom can help you prepare for becoming a teenage women if you let her.
Most of all never hide from her or your dad anything that may be physically wrong with you. When in doubt let the doctor decide.
who would you respect more, a girl who dresses really slutty but isn't actually a slut (basically a tease) or a girl who dresses modest and cute but does things with guys (not a slut, just not a prude)
Maybe an older person point of view may be of interest.
At the present time the idea of style is to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex so that you can enjoy an active social life. This is all part of the teenage years. Problem is there is an upside and a downside to this in today's world. The downside is that your present will become your past which will follow you forever on many social websites.
Not everyone you will meet as you go out in the world is as liberal as I am in my views on teenagers and expression. Many in your future will hold your past against you even if your an honor student; based solely on appearance. This could affect what colleges would accept you and later what employment would be available to you. You also need to take into mind there is very much still a double standard for women.
That being said; I would say there difference between stylish and style. I would say that you should dress to fit your personality. Your not a slut so dressing slutty is something that doesn't fit your personality and frankly you won't be able to pull it off. You will be labeled, but not as a slut or even a tease; most likely as someone who is fraud.
Dress to please who you are and if it fits you and your personality; to show off you best attributes. You will then attract the kind of boys you truly want to date and get to know. Yes most teenage boys are more interested in sex than in romance. They confuse lust for love. There are boys out there who are like you wanting more from life than just a few minutes of sexual pleasure.
Dressing to show who you are will attract the kind of people you truly want to meet; which in reading in your question;is what you are asking and will help you well into the future.
Has anyone ever used strattera for ADHD? i've been using it for about 2 weeks and it hasnt helped or changed me at all.Or made any difference whatsoever
Strattera is the type of medication that has to build up in your system to be totally effective. While I do not use this medication. I am on a medication that also had to build in my system to be totally effective.
As the medication builds you will feel some small changes. Depending on the medication it could take anywhere from 10 DAYS TO A MONTH until the drug has built up enough to be fully effective. If your concerned you should or could check with your doctor or pharmacist.
According to the information website Strattera is first administered in a smaller dosage then raised to the recommended treatment dosage. If at the end of 30 days you still feel that the medication has been of no help contact your doctor and see if the dosage can be raised or if another medication can be given.
From what I read Strattera is very effective and highly recommended in treatment of ADHD. Give it a chance to work.
Well.....i am a 15 year old girl...and recently I have masturbated.....but....everytime I do...I feel guitly and dirty...and I don't want to continue...I want to ask my sister, or brother, or even my parents..but I'm scared to...I keep thinking they will laugh or get mad at me....and say that I am disgusting...so I just wanna know...Is it bad or wrong? And why?
Hi, I am old enough to be your grandfather and hopefully the wisdom of my age and what I am about to impart will allow you to feel better about masturbating.
Let me start by saying masturbation is totally normal. Most teenagers masturbate, be they boys or girl, to relieve the sexual tension brought on by the hormonal changes brought on by puberty. A recent report relates that as many as 90% of the population masturbate. Now this would include adults as well as teenagers and such acts as mutual masturbation, hand jobs, fingering and oral sex. One could define masturbation or mutual masturbation as any sexual activity other than intercourse. Males, especially teenage males, need to relive sexual tension more than females do. Masturbation is a natural way to relive this tension.
Most religions including the Catholic Church condone masturbation; if this is so why do parents and church elders tell children it is wrong to masturbate? The only reason I can think of is the pleasure received from masturbating leads to wanting the pleasure of actual intercourse. In a sense there is a double standard here. As mutual and some people even use single masturbation as a form of foreplay, adults are telling children that something they do on a regular basis is wrong. Well if it is wrong or sinful for the children, would it not be wrong for the adults.
What my wife and I told our children is that masturbation or mutual masturbation is a safe way to satisfy desire without the chance of anyone getting pregnant. There is nothing dirty or disgusting about masturbation; it is a safe way to satisfy a natural urge. The only time masturbation is wrong is when the urge to masturbate precludes doing everything else.
I’m not sure what your parents would say if you asked them. I would hope they would say as I told my children. Depending on how old your brother and sister are the only reason they would laugh, and they shouldn’t is because they masturbate also. Masturbation is a very private thing; something you should do in the privacy of your bedroom with the door locked so you are not disturbed.
Masturbation is totally normal and done in private so that you can get total enjoyment from it. It is also a sexual act and there are very few people who like to have sex in full view of others. Masturbation like sex is not dirty or sinful.
okay, im 17 years old and wont be turning 18 till december.. i am pregnant and due in september.. im covered under my moms medical insurance, and i know my baby wont be able to go under my moms because grandchildren are not covered by their grandparents medical. SO, i have to get my own medical so that the baby will be covered under my insurance.. because im under 18, it is to my knowledge that i have to get medical from the state because it is the cheapest and easiest way i guess..? butttt...... my mom is telling me that if i get medical from the state, my boyfriend has to pay child support to the state.. is that true? he doesnt believe me because he hates my mom and he thinks my mom is trying to screw him over...
Tricky question. Your boyfriend is responsible for this child until the child reaches 18 years of age. Among those responsibilities are providing for the babies medical well being, health insurance.
You need.to see a lawyer and have all of the fathers responsibilities put on paper and secured by court order. This is in the best interest of the child. No matter how much you may be in love today, but things do change.
As to paying the state child support: some states do require the father to pay their support to the state then the state pays the mother. In this manner the state is the recipient it is easier for them to collect from deadbeat dads.
Hi, I am 14 years of age and all my friends have had their period and even my younger sister, 12 years old has had her period. I LOVE kids and what to have some when I get married. If I don't get my period, will I still be able to have kids? What age does the chances of having your period stop?
You should not worry about not haven't gotten your period yet. Everyone matures at different ages.
If you are very athletic, say a gymnasts or track enthusiast, the exercise you put into these sports could be holding back your period. This is normal. This would also stunt your breast growth.
Just look at some female Olympic athletes. Look at the female before and after pictures. While they were in training they are almost flt chested and many if they have periods at all are very irregular. When they stop training their breast grow and their periods start or become very regular.
If you still have questions or are not a sports player. Then ask mom to make an appointment for you with her GYN. The doctor after examining you will be able to answer all your questions. You can even ask to see the doctor privately as at 14 years of age the law guarantees you medical privacy
is it cheating when your husband fills out a profile on personals? and is it cheating when he coresponds to personals on craiglist?
If that is all he is doing then the answer is no. The question then becomes can you be sure that is all he is doing?
If you have any evidence your husband is cheating. Such as suddenly working later, taking business trips he never did before, working weekends and so forth, then you would be correct in assuming he is cheating.
If you have any suspicions that you husband is cheating the first thing you need to do is be checked for AIDS and other STDs. Then you have a decision to make as to if you want a divorce or not.
Until you decide if you are going to divorce or not. And if you are going to continue to have normal marital relations with him it is a good idea to have him wear a condom if you are not using them at this time. This is for your protection and it will also send a message to him that you know what he is up too.
Your husband may not be cheating on you at this time. The subject of doing so may be on his mind though. If so this is an opportunity for you to find out what may be wrong in your marriage from his point of view.
Since I am at the grandfatherly age of life let me offer some grandfatherly advice which is not meant to offend. It is in answer to your unasked question.
The fact that your husband is doing as you say does not mean he is actively cheating. What I see is your husband may be unhappy with something in you marital life. Very possibly your sex life.
Sometimes a man will want to do something in there sex lives they would never ask their wife or lover to do, though would be more than willing to ask a total stranger for or even a prostitute.
My views on sex have always been nothing is kinky or weired as long as both participants are consenting. Whatever anyone else may think of a particular sex act is not material. I was fortunate in that my wife feels the same way and will try most anything once.
If I am correct in what I am thinking about your husbands motives and you wish to save your marriage then you need to think about some things and then talk to your husband. Let him know what you know and ask if he wants to talk about anything. You should add that nothing is off limits he would be free to ask your opinion on anything and you would not think any less of him for asking.
ok how about if you are almost 17 then can you move in with your boyfriend to get away from your parents?
It depends on what the age of majority is in your state. In most states you have to be 18 before the state sees you as an adult. Until them for most everything you need parental permission or seek permission through the courts to be be awarded status as an emancipated minor.
I’m writing to you out of desperation after months in a sad, cloudy haze. I’m a 29-year-old woman who has struggled with depression since childhood, but my condition has seriously declined since a series of troubling events. I have lost interest in my friends, my old interests
and even in planning for my future. I know the signs of depression, but this feels different, somehow. My sadness is like a physical veil
that hangs over me. It makes me feel ugly and shrouded and hidden. I haven’t smiled in ages, and I think people are starting to like me less for it. Please help!
Last summer, I brought up marriage and kids with a man that I loved dearly and shared an apartment with. He did not react well, and I was forced to break off our wonderful relationship. I was devastated that he did not protest the breakup, and still has not changed his mind. In one horrible weekend, I threw away most of my belongings and packed up the rest and moved into a sad, lonely studio apartment.
A few weeks later, a long-time friend decided that he no longer wanted me in his life, since his new girlfriend preferred it that way. I
started to take anti-anxiety pills regularly throughout the day and drink heavily at night. Then, the final straw: I received a long-awaited promotion – one that had been meant to secure my future with a husband and kids – and was forced to part with lots of close co-workers. (I couldn't turn down this new job without jeopardizing my entire career.) I now work long hours in a stressful, high-profile job, and then go home to a dark and lonely apartment. I don’t have time to date or see old friends. The winter has made things worse, and I feel heavier and more isolated and more exhausted by the day.
I am now approaching 30, and I feel robbed of what should have been the best years of my life. I worked so hard throughout my 20s – both
professionally and socially – to overcome my depression, to land this difficult career, and to build a good life for myself. Now I feel like
it has been for nothing, and all because these people that I trusted decided to pull the rug out from under me. I am lonely, but dread dating in my 30s. I work all the time – and for what, if not kids and a happy family? I think obsessively that this was not how things were supposed to end up, and I just can’t seem to get over it.
Please help me. This blanket of depression is so severe that it scares me. I think more and more that it’s not worth living if I can’t find some shred of happiness. Talk therapy has just upset me and I end up “breaking up” with each therapist I see after only a few sessions. What are my other options?
Hi, I'm old enough to be your father or even your grandfather and like you I have suffered from depression for a long time. I hope that the wisdom of my age and the fact I have suffered from some of the same feelings you are currently suffering I can be of some help to you.
First from what you have written I would say you are still suffering from depression. Yes the things you are felling may be different than before they are still symptomatic of depression.
You need to seek the help of a qualified psychiatrist. By qualified I mean one that is board certified. In many states any MD who has had a psychiatric residency can open a psychiatric practice. A board certified psychiatrist is one who has taken and past all the exams and had a fellowship in psychiatry an is certified to practice psychiatry. Once you have found the right doctor you need to be screened for depression so that the correct antidepressant medication can be prescribed and monitored. This will also help with your talk therapy.
It is not unusual to have problems with a talk therapist. I went through three therapist before finding my present therapist. You have to be comfortable with your therapist if therapy is going to work. There are two different kinds of psychological theories psychologist work with. The one you are working with may work under one theory and if it is not working for you say so. The therapist can help you find a therapist who uses the other theory which may work better for you.
One would also think being male I would be more comfortable with a male therapist. Turns out I am more comfortable with my female therapist. My psychiatrist is a male doctor. Which holds true to the rest of my doctors. My family doctor is female, my pains management doctor is male. My acupuncturist is female. It all depends on your comfort level with each of your doctors. The operative words are comfort levels and that is what you must find.
I have never been big on psychology mainly because I do not know how it works. All I do know is; when you have the write doctors in place and you are compliant, it works. Frankly since it is working for me that is all I need to know.
It will work for you too, if you give it half a chance. You will get out of therapy what you put into it. Meaning if you just go and sit there and expect the therapist to do all the work; then it will not work for you. This is why it is so important that you find someone you are comfortable with.
Like it or not at some point you are and will, if you work with your therapist, going to reveal the underlying cause of your depression. I did, I didn't want too. I had it all locked away in the dark recesses of my mind and then one day it all came tumbling out. Almost without my ever thinking about it. When it did I started feeling better.
Give therapy another chance. Find a psychiatrist to treat your depression. Trust me the world is a better place with you in it. When you see things more clearly you will also be able to find that loving relationship you are looking for.
Well, we are both in high school and we recently started dating. We both like each other as much as we both can. Almost love. He recently told me he wasn't a virgin. And that kind of really bothered me. We are talking it out and I think I just need some time to get used to it. Naturally, I am a little bit insecure. But this just didn't settle well in my stomach. I guess I assumed he was a virgin because he's really sweet. And I should not have assumed this in the first place. But the girl he had sex with he says it wasn't good and short-lived. It was a few years ago and she told him he was her second which was a lie and he was actually her fourth. That concerns me because of STD's. Well, I'm not sure why I am reacting so badly to this usually I am pretty chill maybe it was the sudden shock of it that I wasn't expecting. I'm pretty tough to break and this just broke me. I never thought that it would matter. And it's actually really weird why this is upsetting me. We are talking about it and he feels really bad and I accept his apologies because I do like him so much still. And I will get over it. I just want to know is it normal how I am feeling? Or am I just being a p*ssy? Thanks, please be easy on me.
Forget abstinence that isn't any part of my question and not what I want to hear. I guess I'm just sad that we can't do this together. And that he won't think of it as special as I do.
Hi, I'm old enough to be your grandfather and no I'm not going to preach to you about abstinence. That would be hypocritical. I hoping the wisdom of my age will be of some help to you.
First; before you have your first sexual intercourse I would like you to review the information you will find on the following website: http://www.pamf.org/teen/sex/virginity/readyornot.html.
I found this website when answering similar questions for other young ladies asking similar questions. I believe you find answers to questions here that you haven't asked.
As to the question you asked. We all mature at different ages and we all have a different set of values. For young boys between the start of puberty until say age 21 or 22 sex is driven mostly by lust which is driven by the hormones of puberty.
As for women be during or after puberty, sex always has to have an element of love. For that reason young ladies will be virgins longer than young boys. If your boy friend is also older than you by even a year or half a year it is very possible he would not be a virgin.
While it is nice to experience sex for the first time together it is also a little unrealistic the older you get. It is also a benefit to you if he is more experienced as he may be able to make your first time a better experience for you.
Your concerns about AIDS and STDs is well founded. To allay your fears on this you can ask him to get tested, either by his family doctor or at a free clinic.
One other thing I want to mention; when you do have your first sexual experience. Make sure you are someplace safe, someplace where you will not be disturbed and someplace you are comfortable. Make sure you are ready and your boyfriend does not rush. Tell him what you need. Show him how to touch you if you need more stimulation. This will make for a much better first experience.