Do you really want to be friends with a guy who denied and lied to someone about you? I sure wouldn't. It doesn't really matter how him and his girlfriend were, whether they talked a lot or not, that is their business. And it doesnt make it right to but in on their relationship. But now, it sounds like this guy doesn't deserve any girlfriends or friends for that matter. Yet, you still want to be his friend after all of this? He sat there on the phone with you and trash talked his girlfriend, but you still want to talk to him? Someday, that could be you he'll be trash talking.



-TheTeenGirl

Why are you flirting with a guy that already is involved with another girl? I know it may not seem like a big deal to you, but how do you think his girlfriend would react if she knew you were flirting with him, and bugging him? Not good. I'm not saying shes gong to come and beat you up, shes going to be upset. What if you had a boyfriend and you had no idea that he was flirting and picking on some other girl? You'd hate it. I strongly suggest thinking about others first. (I don't know if you were flirting with him, but I'm guessing that you are, or else this probably wouldn't even matter to you.)



-TheTeenGirl

Well, everyone wants a baby. A lot of people really do want a little person to take care of in their lives, but you have to remember that you don't have enough to support a baby yet. A job, money, more money, your own place to live in, it takes so much work to have a baby. I know you probably understand this, but I don't think you'll be getting an answer saying, "well, find a guy, and get pregnant." Just know that someday you will have a baby, and you'd love to right now, but it wouldn't be fair to you or the baby if you did. You know, I know you want a child more when you watch your niece, but who knows, maybe it could be a practice for later on in your life. Sometimes nieces can be like children of our own to us. Everytime you get the urge to have a baby, just think of how you couldn't support the baby at the moment, but you will later.


[Well, I don't know what answer you wanted, I don't really care for the rating you gave me, but sorry, I don't know what answer you want, I highly doubt its some mental illness going on, everyone has a desire to have children]


-TheTeenGirl

Well, to start off, do not try to pick a fight with this girl. Shes not the problem you need to focus on. Your boyfriend is the problem you need to pay attention to. I think that maybe instead of going off and yelling, things could have been solved a little easier. Your boyfriend was definetly crossing the line for even touching his ex-girlfriend that way. To be honest, even though yelling and being upset was a little far, I couldn't really blame you for doing it. The only part that concerns me is that you did it in front of people. I know you didn't want to be reminded, but if you both are as madly in love as you describe, then you've got to solve issues in your relationship with him in private. Don't make your relationship become the school gossip. Its wrong too, why put people through that anyway? It sounds to me like you were trying to show off by talking trash to him in front of everyone. Thats a really selfish thing to do, and he did something really foolish too, so you both have a lot of things to work out. You need to apologize to him and explain your emotions when you saw her arm and found out that the person you love and trust did it to her. He needs to understand that it is really wrong to do something so damaging to a girlfriend like biting his pass girlfriend. Your boyfriend needs to tell her to back off when she tries to come onto him. You have to talk to him though. Leave the ex girlfriend out of this.




-TheTeenGirl

I'm not sure why, but I always take questions. So feel free to ask me anytime!


-TheTeenGirl

Trust me, hes not over you as you think he is. This is his way of trying to get over you. He thinks that seeing other girls will erase you out of his mind, but its not. I know its hard to see him with someone else, but maybe you need to let him know that all you wanted was a break. If you've already made that clear to him, just go up to him, write him a letter, call him, or something and say, "I don't want things to end up this way, all I wanted was a break for us, I don't want us to end forever, I still love you." I know it seems really helpless to say you still love him, but you should let him know. If he continues yto be a jerk, then, you'll have to just wait until he comes back for you, or until he does something besides getting angry and getting new girlfriends. Do you really think after 3 years of a great relationship that he'd suddenly be in love with someone else? No way. Hes making a common mistake in relationships. He'll get it.




-TheTeenGirl

Errr...I think you're asking the wrong person for music advice. At least not hip-hop, I'm not a hip-hop girl, sorry.



-TheTeenGirl

Well, I'll start out by saying that I am hoping you really aren't telling her that she needs to face the fact that her best friend is gone, because when you lose someone, they still won't understand or be able to face any facts 4 days after a death. I know you're just trying to comfort her, but what really needs to happen is, that you need to tell her parents or yours what shes turning to, to cope. The drugs, and the cutting. I know that you think your cousin will never forgive you if you told anyone, but this will really effect her life if she continues on down this path. Thats the only way she'll ever stop at this point. No person will be able to convince her to stop. She needs professional help, and if you really wanted her to be ok, then you'd tell someone about her bad ways of coping. Right now, her parents, or her guardian are probably scared and want to know what her thoughts are, and shes probably not willing to share or say so, but they need to know what shes doing at least. Maybe you shouln't remind her of the good times her and her best friend had quite yet. Its probably a little too early to remind her. Please tell her parents or yours, if you need help with this, just send me an inbox, I really would like to help.




-TheTeenGirl

Why are you even friends with this neighbor? You shouldn't be doing the no strings attached or the friends with benefits thing. Its nothing but a big mind game. Now look what you've got yourself into. It wasn't worth it, because now you feel stuck with him, but even if you swore on your own grave that you'd never stop doing the "no strings attatched" game, you aren't stuck doing it. If Bob is pressuring after you said no about 3 times, tell Bob to go home. If he can't take no for an answer, he needs to go home to show him that you're serious. You owe him no explaination, he knows you have a boyfriend now, that should be enough to know why you've stopped. You don't need nice ways to say it. The best way to say it is, "no Bob, quit asking" and if he keeps on, say, "Bob, you obviously aren't listening, so, I want you to leave now." Even if you want to continue doing this with Bob, get rid of Jim first, but I think you are way better off ending this game with Bob.



-TheTeenGirl

Everyone thinks about suicide, not actually as in they are thinking about it, but everyone gets curious about it, and thinks about it. What I think you should stop is the suicide letters, and here are my reasons for that. Number one is, its just plan sick and weird, and it can make you depressed thinking of it. I'm not saying you are sick, but it will make you mentally ill. Number two, is because your parents just might find those letters, and the next thing you know, you're in an institution because they would be horrified. Could you imagine seeing suicide letters in someone you love's journal, or in their room or something. Its horrifying. Its ok to be curious about your funeral, and who would be sad, and who would be there, but its a totally different thing if your curiousity gets out of control. And I'd say that writing suicide notes is probably an out of control curiousity. But again, we don't want to make this into something it may not be. So, I think you need to stop with the letters first off.


You say that you have really great things in your life. Thats a really good way to get your mind off of suicide. Anytime you think of it, just think, "my death won't be until a long time, and I won't die of suicide because my life is great. I've got a great life ahead of me. I have a boyfriend who I want to spend the rest of my life with, my family loves and supports me, and they'd hate to see me die, the people in my life want me alive." Now, to me, it sounds like this could be a type of mental illness. If you think that it is more serious, then I think you need to start letting your family know. I would really like to help you in this. So, if you're unsure of how to tell your parents, or need more help, I'd be very glad to help you throgh this. Because, its terrible to see a girl with a great life and other things go and have these thoughts.


-TheTeenGirl

I don't think you understand things well with this situation. Do you think including what Jordan's girl looks like will help with your answer any better? Not with me. Hes your crush, so its obvious that you think the girl he goes out with isn't that pretty. What if there was a girl who liked a guy you were with and described you the way you described her? You'd probably be upset and wouldn't think it mattered what you looked like to her, because it doesn't. What I'm saying is that it doesn't matter what this guy's girlfriend, or the girl he goes out with is pretty or not. He likes her. Now, I'm not sure if you mean he goes out with her as in they are together as boyfriend and girlfriend, or they just have fun and are friends. My guess would be that they are together. You should stop picking on a guy that has a girlfriend, again, picture yourself as this girl. Would you want a girl picking on your guy? No way. You'd feel bad. If you flirt with him, you'll get noticed in a bad way. I don't mean to be so picky, but it does not and will not ever matter what his girlfriend looks like. Its his taste.



-TheTeenGirl

I'm really glad that you know it is an evil thing to do to try to break a couple up. Very smart. Don't try to date other girls to throw her off of your mind, because its not going to work. A lot of people make that common mistake in relationships. Also remember that it doesn't matter if you think they are breaking up anyway, they still deserve respect in their relationship. I think the best you can do is to go on with your own life, and just keep having her as a friend until your body understands that you can't have her. Another thing you can do is to try not talking to her as much so it won't torture you. Thats probably the best thing to do.


-TheTeenGirl

Its really hard to like the same guy as your friend, and this situation does not exactly have to do with who laid eyes on him first. It has to do with how much respect you have for your best friend. I think that you need to let your friend know that you really Randy too, and it would hurt your feelings if she dated him, which is why you wouldn't date him. But, your friend did have a crush on him before you, so, you can either tell her it would hurt you, or you could let her and Randy have a chance if he happens to like her. But, you should tell her that you like him too, and that you wouldn't take him, and that you just wanted to let her know that you like him too. Sometimes, if somebody says they like someone, they'll think that they'll be flirting with them like you did, but you need to assure her that you wouldn't hurt her. But, really really try finding some other guys around, because, its not good if this repeaditly happens.



-TheTeenGirl

Let them know that you're friends with both groups of friends, and that its hard to be stuck in the middle of it all. Are the groups fighting? If they are fighting, just tell them both that you like them both and that you aren't leaving to join another group and stay. If they aren't, maybe you should try joining the groups.



-TheTeenGirl

That sounds pretty upsetting, you should probably talk to her or someone about it. I know it may sound really stupid to try to talk to her, but it could work. When she says something, just ask her why she says those things to you. And when she jokes around and says another rude comment, just tell her that you're serious. Just say, "Howcome you always pick on me? I havn't done anything to you, I just don't really want to fight." I think I can understand if you don't even want to try to act serious and talk with her, but its worth a try. And if it doesn't work, then don't say anything back and go straight to the computer, or your room to calm down, if its hurting you that bad, explain this to your parents. Also, when she tells you what to do, don't do it. Just don't say or do anything when shes giving you orders.



-TheTeenGirl

Well, I am a freshmen this year, and I really enjoy highschool because you're treated more like an adult, and you'll appreciate being treated as an adult more than anything. But, its probably stupid to take advantage of it and skip a class and get caught. But, as for the guys, yes, they are more mature, but you probably won't notice it until you're a junior, (11th grade). I wouldn't really know because I'm only in 9th grade, but I'm not quite noticing anything yet in freshmen boys. In middle school, theres just a lot of imaturity and drama, there isn't as much at high school, because again, people are changing and growing up. When you enter high school, thats when you start thinking about what you want out of your life more, and getting serious about your grades. It sounds pretty stressful, but it really is a better school.


-TheTeenGirl

First off, before you decide to just keep going with this guy, talk to your friend. Just tell her that you were told by her that she doesn't like him anymore, and you thought it was ok. You may have already told her that, but everytime she gets mad, say, "you told me you didn't like him, remember?"
But, talk to her in a friendly way. Just tell her your reason and ask her whats going on first.


-TheTeenGirl

I really think your parents should take you out of this school. It is really hard to go to school with the kind of pressure that you're describing. Usually, I'd tell people to stick it out, but you're different. Explain to your parents that you understand why it would be tough to be taken out of a really good school, but its really hard to do as well as you do when you have classmates hating you, and being alone. You can still end up at a really good college going to different high schools. I think for this decision, you can think about yourself.


-TheTeenGirl

Well, if thats really your question, I don't think you really over reacted, it sounds like you didn't really have too much of a conversation enough to fit in a reaction. What I would have done is just ignored it and gone on with my life, but even if you replied, its not a big deal. I hope you aren't too upset about it because, you'd be letting her get the best of you. If you know that you were faithful to her when you were with her, that should be enough, shes practicly out of your life, so its not much to dwell on. If she keeps saying things, say, "well, if I was so unfaithful to you, then why are you text messaging a guy like me?" Or, just ignore anymore messages that come onto your phone from her.




-TheTeenGirl

Hey, sorry for replying so late, I was trying to look up your column, and its not searching it, but I wanted to know how you are doing! Is everything alright so far?

My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.

I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.

Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.

About My Ratings:
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